08x20 - Ex Marks the Spot

[bunniefuu]

♪ You take the good,
you take the bad ♪

♪ You take 'em both
and there you have ♪

♪ The facts of life ♪

♪ The facts of life ♪

♪ There's a time you
gotta go and show ♪

♪ You're growin'
now you know about ♪

♪ The facts of life ♪

♪ The facts of life ♪

♪ When the world never seems ♪

♪ To be livin' up
to your dreams ♪

♪ Then suddenly
you're findin' out ♪

♪ The facts of
life are all about ♪

♪ You ♪

♪ All about you ♪

♪ You ♪

♪ All about you ♪

♪ It takes a lot
to get 'em right ♪

♪ When you're learnin'
the facts of life ♪

♪ Learnin' the facts of life ♪

♪ Learnin' the facts of life ♪

♪ The facts of life ♪♪

Look at us.

After all these years, you'd
think there'd be more between us

Than just newspaper.

I mean, have we
reached the point

That we can't even strike
up a simple conversation?

Okay, tootie. What do
you want to talk about?

Anything interesting
in the paper?

Morning.

Well.

Another gifted
conversationalist.

She even brought her
own reading material.

It's a book on career choices.

I can't believe all the
things there are I can do.

Under computers alone,

There must be 100
different occupations.

Do you know that
a systems analyst

Starts with a salary of $26,500?

$26,500?

Might as well just
join the peace corps.

Look, in two months,
we kiss langley good-bye.

You may not care what happens

After graduation, but I do.

I'll get it.

Ah! Now, there's a
future for you, jo.

A doorman!

Hi. Can I help you? Oh, yes.

Is beverly ann stickle here?

No, sorry. She's not home.

Is there a message
I can give her?

Well, it's, uh...
Kind of personal.

All right. I won't listen.

I'm frank stickle.

Beverly ann's ex-husband?

May I come in?

Uh, yeah. Sure. Uh...

I'm jo. This is blair,
natalie, and tootie.

I guess she mentioned me, huh?

Uhh... Well... Yes,
your name did pop up...

Casually in
conversation that was...

Casual.

In other words,
she hates my guts.

Well...

"Guts" covers an awful
lot of territory, you know.

Yes, I get the picture.

So when do you expect her?

Soon... Later.

Sooner or later.

Well, just tell her
that I dropped by

And I'll be calling
her. Thank you.

Oh, there's nothing like
an early-morning bike ride...

To ruin your entire day.

Hi, boojie.

What are you doing here?

Oh. Well, I just came to
new york for the weekend,

And I thought I'd drop by
to see how you were doing.

How uncharacteristically
thoughtful of you.

Okay, the bikes
are all put away.

We must do this again

When my thighs stop throbbing.

Frank stickle, this is andy.

I'm adopting him.

And this is oliver. I'm, uh...

Let's just say she's
not adopting me.

Uh... Well.

Here we all are.

Uh... Why are we all here?

Well, I thought that, uh...

Maybe we could talk.

No, I don't think so.

Ollie and I have lunch plans.

I understand, but I'll only
be here for a short time,

And honestly, this is
very important, boojie.

It must be some
kind of code word.

Oliver, would you mind?

Not at all.

We can have lunch tomorrow.

I'll be even hungrier by then.

Nice guy.

Oh.

So you noticed the difference.

Well... There's a
muffin in the kitchen

With my name on it.

It was very nice
meeting you, frank.

Nice... Meeting you.

Nice.

I'll go put the
bikes away... Again.

Oh.

It's kind of warm in here.

Can we sit down?

Please do.

I see you still
tap your fingers.

And I see that you still
like to point that out.

Oh.

So, how's the trollop?

Her name was trixie,

And she wasn't a trollop.

She happened to be
a very nice person.

Oh, I'm sure she was.

Well, I'm not
seeing her anymore.

Look, I realize that I
made some mistakes.

Oh, yes.

You did make some mistakes.

Now, what were they again?

Well... I always left
the toilet seat up.

Ha ha ha.

No.

That wasn't it.

I sometimes do that myself.

It was leaving me.

Oh. Yes.

Well, i... I... I...

I dropped by the
house the other day.

Our... Our house? Yes.

Oh, we had some good
times in that place, didn't we?

One or two.

Oh, come on now, boojie.

Okay.

Two and a half.

There I was, standing there,

Looking around the house,

When all of a sudden,
I realized something.

We don't live there anymore.

Nothing gets by
you, does it, frank?

But we were happy then.

And... And I want us to be
able to be that way again.

There... There's no reason we can't
take a chance on having a new start.

A... A new start?

I wanna ask you something.

Oh! You're right.

It is warm in here. Oh!

Jo! Let me help you with that.

Oh, I think I can handle it.

Been working out.

I wouldn't want
you to overdo it.

These girls, always
testing their independence.

I can't believe this is
actually happening.

Oh! Somebody pinch me!

If I do, will you give
me my muffin back?

I'm sorry, jo.

I had to collect my thoughts.

I... I think frank wants to
get back together with me.

He must be kidding!

I mean, why would he want
to do something like that?

He must be out of his mind.

No! No, what I mean is...

He must be really desperate.

No, no, no! What
I really mean is...

Some muffin to
go with your foot?

I... I'm sure that's
what he's leading up to.

I know frank stickle.

There are only two other times

I've seen beads of
sweat on his upper lip:

The night he proposed,
and then that week

He was passing a kidney stone.

Well, considering those choices,

I certainly hope
he's gonna propose.

Ha!

On the other hand,

A... A kidney stone
would be nice.

If he thinks he can just
waltz back into my life

Any time he wants, he's
got another think coming.

Gave him the best
years of my life.

And now he wants what's left.

Which is... Is a lot, actually.

I'm gonna go back
in there and tell him

That there's no
way on this earth

That I would ever
consider for one moment

Taking him back.

Is my mascara all right?

I'm sorry, frank,

But I do have responsibilities.

Oh, it was nice
of you to help jo

Carry her muffin.

Is there... Something
you're nervous about?

No, no, no. It's just
a little indigestion.

Oh.

Maybe if you could get me a...

Drink of water.

Of course.

And then... When
you feel better,

You can... Ask me

Whatever it is
you want to ask me.

Beverly ann!

Yes, frank?

I think you better
call an ambulance!

Oh, no!

9-11. Oh!

9... There's no
11 on this thing!

1-1!

Right! 1-1.

Dr. Andrews, please answer
your page, dr. Andrews.

Here's the coffee.

Oh. Oh, gosh.

Forgot the cream. I'll just...

That's okay, jo.

We'll just drink it black.

No. No problem.

I'll just... Go
across the street

And get some of
the fresh stuff. Heh.

Why don't you just go to
wisconsin where the cows are?

Admit it, jo. You
can't stand hospitals.

Huh! That's not true.

Hey, it's okay.

If there's something about
the smell of disinfectant

And the sight of
needles and tubes

And bottles with
strange fluids dripping

That gives you the
creeps, then just leave.

I'm outta here!

Excuse me.

Oh, I'm all out of change.

Can you break a 20?

Uh, sorry.

Oh, I have a ten and a five.

I have four singles.

The smallest I have is a 50.

Here's a quarter. Take it.

Oh, thank you.

Oh... This waiting, huh?

Yeah, I know.

Well, you're awfully
quiet over here.

Um, I was just kind of thinking.

Oh, come on.

Frank's gonna be all right.

You think he'll like me?

With this face?

Nah, not a chance.

Uh, vicki, do me a favor
and keep an eye on this.

I'll be right back.

Where are you going?

They're waiting at pathology.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. They
always want it fresh,

And they always want it now.

Well, I hope it stays warm.

Well, if not, you can always
throw it in the microwave.

Gosh, we shouldn't be
taking up all these seats.

I'm sure there are
people who need them

Much more than we do.

Not him.

Lift up that sheet,
will you, please?

You know... It all
makes sense now.

Frank must've known he was sick

And wanted to get
back together with me

Before time ran out on him.

One minute you're
happy and healthy,

The next, you're a pimento loaf

On the way to pathology.

I'm really gonna
take care of him.

We'll exercise together,

I'll watch his diet.

Maybe we'll go to one
of those health spas

And sit in the jacuzzi.

Thinking of getting
married, aren't you?

Well... Maybe.

Yeah. Hey...

No matter what
happens in my life,

You and me, kid, we're family.

We're all family.

Mrs. Stickle?

Yes? Yes?

Is there a way to
narrow this down?

You must be beverly ann!

Yes.

Who must you be?

I'm frank's wife.

You're frank's wife?

Yes, I am.

H... How is he, doctor?

You're... Frank's wife?

I think she's frank's wife.

That's right.

She's frank's
wife, and he's okay.

He's had a severe
att*ck of aerophagia.

Oh, my goodness! What is that?

In layman's terms... Gas.

You can see him now. He's fine.

You should have him
back by tomorrow.

I always thought of myself as...

Frank's wife.

Okay, one of you should
have him back by tomorrow.

Excuse me, I'm going
to see my husband now.

Beverly ann, I'm really sorry.

You okay?

Oh! Sure. Of course.

I... Should've...

I should've seen it coming.

If it's any consolation,
beverly ann,

Frank's a fool.

You're much prettier.

And nicer. And smarter.

Father beatty, you're
wanted in room 301.

Could we continue
this discussion

Out in the fresh air, please?

Sure. Beverly ann,
we'll take you home.

Oh, excuse me.

Uh, frank would like
to see you for a minute.

Uh, you go ahead.

I'll be fine.

You sure?

Mm-hmm.

Good. Let's go.

Beverly ann, my name is noreen.

I take it frank
didn't get a chance

To tell you about us.

Oh, I'm sure he would have.

Had he not been
tragically stricken by...

Gas.

Did... Did you cook him

Some sort of strange food?

I mean, you may not know it,

But he has a very
sensitive stomach.

Oh... Now, how
would I know that?

I mean, we only ate
together maybe, oh...

25,000, 30,000 Times.

Well, we... We don't spend

That much time in the kitchen.

I mean, you know, we're
just still newlyweds.

How nice for you.

Yeah.

You know, frank...

Always speaks well of you.

Yeah, what... What was
that cute little name

He had for you?

Boobie?

Boojie.

Oh.

And by the way, you
owe me a quarter.

Well, I'll... Get change.

Hi, frank.

Hi, booj.

Well, you gave us quite a scare.

You're not the only one.

It surprised the hell out of me.

Well...

This day's been full
of surprises, hasn't it?

Oh. You, uh, met noreen.

I, uh, guess she's
what you meant

By making a new start?

Well, partially.

Partially? Oh.

How many wives are
we talking about here?

Oh, just noreen, but
now that we're married,

I was thinking it
doesn't make much sense

For you and me to
hold on to that house.

So, why don't we sell it?

Our house?

The tenants have made
us a very good offer.

I see.

So, you want to sell our house.

What do you think?

What good is a window
that doesn't open?

What if you want to throw
something large out of it?

Just give it some thought.

I'll give it some thought.

I'll give it all the
thought it deserves.

That should do it. No.

Oh, you're not being fair.

How dare you talk
to me about being fair?

You're the one who
walked out on me.

You're the one who got
married again behind my back,

And you want me to be fair?

I'll sell that house
over your dead body.

And get well soon.

Ever since I've known him,

Frank's always
made the decisions.

What movie to see,
where to go on vacation,

When to end our marriage.

Now he's decided that I
should sell our house.

Well, from now on, I'll
make my own decisions,

And I'm not selling.

Beverly ann, stop
torturing yourself.

You're right.

I should be torturing frank.

You've never even
mentioned that house before.

Why all the sudden
passion for it?

You just don't understand

What that house means to me.

Did I ever tell
you about bessie?

Oliver, this is hardly the time

To discuss other women.

Bessie was a car.

It was the last car we had

Before I split up with my wife.

What a lemon.

I mean the car.

It was always breaking down,

And whenever you
signaled left, the horn blew,

But I could never bring
myself to trade it in.

Then I realized I wasn't
holding on to the car,

I was holding on to the past.

So I junked bessie
and bought a pinto.

Granted, it wasn't
a good decision,

But sometimes, you
have to move on.

Are you suggesting
that I'm using the house

To hold on to frank?

Well, if the house fits...

Oliver, i... I
really don't think

We're relating to
each other very well.

Uh-oh. Not relating
to each other.

This doesn't sound good.

Hey, bev, oliver.
How's it going?

Good. Well, I'll
just slip on out.

Nice talking to you, though.

I can see you've got
a lot on your mind,

So why don't I just let
you work things out?

When you're ready, I'd
love to get a call from you.

I have no idea what
was going on in there,

But I've been in meat
lockers that were warmer.

Things have got to get better.

They can't get any worse.

More career books, jo?

Oh, yeah.

I went to see that
counselor again.

Oh, good.

So, what are you gonna
be when you grow up?

At least I'm working
on growing up.

So, what did the
career counselor say?

Ah, she just said that I
was on the right track,

And just because
a train was leaving

Didn't mean I had to be on it.

No, what I meant was,

I still have plenty of time

To decide whatever... Hi.

Oh, please don't
let me interrupt you.

I know you're all acutely aware

Of what's been going
on with me today,

But don't let that
interfere with anything.

Beverly ann, if there's
something you want to discuss...

No, no, no, no, don't
let this get in the way

Of your conversation.

Now, jo, you were
talking about something.

Please, continue.

All right.

Anyway, what I meant
was that there's still

All these great
possibilities for my future,

And I should just enjoy
being able to make a choice.

Nice try, jo.

What?

First oliver, then you.

Don't you think I know

What you're trying to do?

You're pretending to be
talking about yourself,

But what you're really
doing is talking about me

And my situation.

I am?

Come on, jo.

Great possibilities
for the future,

Being able to make a choice,

Stop holding on to the past.

Um, she didn't say
anything about the past.

No, but that was coming next.

You girls have a pretty
good act going on here,

But you can't keep
it up much longer.

Beverly ann, whatever
it is you're thinking,

We're not doing it.

Tootie, look me right in the eye

And tell me you have no idea

What I'm talking about.

I have no idea what
you're talking about.

Honestly, we weren't
giving you any advice...

But the advice we weren't
giving you was good advice.

Maybe I should
go see frank again.

Jo, I need support. Will you
go with me to the hospital?

Wait for me, jo.

You're leaving me?

I'll be right out.

Good luck.

Can't believe all the food
they waste in this place.

Oh, I'm sorry!

Oh!

I don't know why I'm here.

I could have just called

Or left you a note.

The kind of note you left me.

I keep this handy,

Just in case I start to
feel civil toward you.

"Dear boojie, blah, blah, blah,

"25 Good years,
blah, blah, blah,

Only now, there's someone else."

Oh. Hello.

I thought visiting
hours were over.

I was just waiting
for frank to wake up.

He's a very sound sleeper.

I know.

Look, beverly ann,

I realize we got
off to a bad start,

But I don't see any reason

Why we can't be friends.

Oh, come on, noreen.

Let's show our garters here.

What you're really after

Is to get me to sell the house.

You know, I'm sorry
that we didn't meet

Under other circumstances.

We might have almost
liked each other.

Uh-oh.

Did you sleep well, honey?

Hmm?

What is she doing here?

I don't know. We
never got that far.

I just came to
tell you how I feel,

'Cause something
finally dawned on me.

I don't need to hold
onto the past anymore.

I've got too much
going for me already.

I have andy, I have the girls,

I have oliver, and
you know what, frank?

I have myself.

And you know what else, frank?

You can send me the papers.

I'll sell the house.

Oh, thank you. That's great.

Doesn't that drive you crazy?

What?

Have a nice marriage.