02x25 - Big Time Contest

[bunniefuu]

- Kelly!

Make sure the dogs are on time for our big meeting.

- Here we are! - And...

All: right on time!

- Bs here on time?

You guys have never done this before.

- Well, it's amazing how much you can get done

when you've sworn off dating girls.

- You've sworn off dating girls?

- Well, they just end up moving to new zealand on you.

- And then you're on again, off again

is on again, then off again.

It's exhausting.

- Since I've sworn off my fickle dating habits,

my iq has gone up points.

Go ahead. Ask me anything.

- Okay, who was the first--

- alexander hamilton.

- With the time we save by not chasing girls,

we've increased our hockey playing %

and decreased our showering %.

All: whoo!

- Please increase your showering.

- Yup, it's official.

Big time rush is never going on a date again.

- So what's the big news?

- You finally made the cover of pop tiger magazine!

- With their "win a date with big time rush" contest.

- ♪ Ah, ah, ah-ah, oh

- ♪ make it count, play it straight ♪

♪ don't look back, don't hesitate ♪

- ♪ when you go big time

- ♪ what you want, what you feel ♪

♪ never quit and make it real ♪

- ♪ when you roll big time

- ♪ oh-oh, oh-oh

- ♪ hey, hey

- ♪ listen to your heart now

- ♪ hey, hey

- ♪ don't you feel the rush

- ♪ uh-oh, uh-oh

♪ uh-oh, uh-oh

- ♪ oh

- ♪ go and shake it up

♪ whatcha gotta lose

♪ go and make your luck

♪ with the life you choose

♪ if you want it all, lay it on the line ♪

♪ it's the only life you got so you got to live it big time ♪

- win a date with big time rush.

- Spend a day with the boys of btr at the famous palmwoods.

- And wrap up your date with a big-time party

in the very studio the guys record their hits.

- But, gustavo, we've sworn off dating.

- Mm, yeah.

No, you haven't! - Guys, guys.

It's a huge first step being on the cover of pop tiger,

but now we have to work even harder to climb the cover.

All: climb the whatta?

- There are three levels of success

on every teen fan-zine.

The entry level,

located at the bottom of the mag,

like, "win a date with big time rush,"

or "what's jordan's big secret?"

- The rising star level, mid to high on the magazine

with a bigger picture,

currently occupied by rapper marcus.

- And finally, the superstar level,

which dominates the cover, currently occupied

by teen vampire queen aubrey stewart.

- Another date gone horribly wrong.

- So we have to wow these dates

and impress the editors of pop tiger

so that we can climb the cover and get to the next level.

- But, gustavo, this timing is terrible.

All: we're done with dates.

We're going on a date!

- Dogs, heel.

- Hey, guys, I'm annie winters, editor of pop tiger magazine.

Now, we just want you guys to be yourselves, have fun,

and make sure that your dates have the best time ever.

All: got it! - Okay.

Let's meet the winners.

First up is james' date for today.

Jeanette.

- Hello, jeanette.

- O-m-g, I can't believe I get to spend the whole day

with james diamond.

- You don't spend the day with james diamond.

You experience it.

- Carlos, your date for today is tiffany.

- Tiffany, it is very nice to meet you.

- I still can't believe I won.

- Kendall,

you'll be with bobby.

- Sounds cute.

- Sweet!

I can't believe I have a date with kendall knight

of big time rush.

- Yep. Believe it!

- If you read this little fella's entry,

you'd know he is the biggest btr fan ever.

- I always poster-pretend I'm you.

♪ Oh-oh, oh-oh

- ha, all right.

- I'll see you two tonight at the party.

Thank you.

- [Grunts] he's a hugger.

- And finally, logan, your contest winner is rona.

- Where's my date?

[Gasps] oh, look at him.

He's like a boy-man.

- Okay, let's get a sh*t of all of our contest winners

with their big-time dates.

- [Mouthing words]

- stay.

- Holy schamoley.

Is that the big time rush awesome swirly slide?

- Yep. Want to go down it?

- Whoo-hoo!

Wowza!

I could live in that thing.

I'm serious.

Throw a couple pillows up in here, and I'm good.

- Cool, so what else do you want to--

- horsey-back ride! - [Grunts]

- hey, if mom asks, I'm in the park.

- 'Kay.

- Whoa. Who was that?

- My sister katie.

- Dude, hook me up.

- No.

You won a date with me, not my sister.

- And now I want to date your sister.

She's schmokin' hot!

- Wha-- - let's go.

- No. No. We're not going.

- I want to meet your sister!

- We're not going to. Heel. Heel!

- So what's your favorite btr song?

- I know, right?

- [Giggling]

- hey, a big-time fan like you

shouldn't be tied down to one member of the band.

You should meet carlos. - Great!

- [Clearing throat]

jeanette, carlos.

Carlos, jeanette.

Hey, what do you say we get our dates some lemonade?

- We have some lemonade.

- What do you say, buddy?

We have to switch dates.

- What? Why? Jeanette seems really nice.

- Well, if you like her so much, then we should switch.

Good call. - You always do this.

Like, at restaurants, you want my meatball sub

when your cheeseburger is perfectly fine.

- It's one of the things you love about me.

- I don't want to switch.

- Carlos, I want a meatball sub.

- I don't get it.

I mean, you're cute but you're no bobby sherman.

- So you're a fan of big time rush.

- Never heard of you.

- Then why'd you enter the contest?

- I enter every contest.

- I've won tofu for life,

a guest spot in some guy's music video...

- ♪ Ohh

♪ ohh

- and now a free trip to l.a. To visit my sister.

- Okay, wait, so you don't want to go on a date

with big time rush?

- Why not? My sister works till :.

Now, according to this, it says you're the smart one.

So how about, on our first date,

you do my taxes.

Dig in, honey.

- I want to go to the park to meet your sister.

- No.

- I want to go to the park to meet your sister.

- No.

Look, you said my sister was "schmokin' hot,"

and that upsets me, so now we're gonna play

big time rush's favorite video games.

- No, not meeting your sister upsets me,

and you're taking me to the park now,

'cause I don't think that pop tiger

would like to hear I had the worst date ever

wah!

- Hey, it's picture time. - Wah!

- Yay! We're going to the park!

- Yay!

- Okay, in exchange for switching dates,

I agree to wax your hockey helmet every day.

- Ooh. Two coats.

- Okay.

And you get dibs on all genies, leprechauns,

and wish-granting amulets should I find one.

- Ooh, and magic rings.

- Magic rings. Fine.

And lastly, you have dibs on any of my organs

should you need them.

Anything else?

- Nope. I'm good. Sign here.

And sign here.

- Now.

Meatball sub!

Hey. - Funny story.

There was a mix-up with the paperwork.

Turns out, carlos was supposed to date jeanette,

and I was supposed to date you.

Kooky mix-up.

- Um, all right.

- I guess that's okay. - Great.

- Okay, so, jeanette,

what would you like to know about big time rush?

- Well, I'd love to know what kind of products

you put in your hair, 'cause I'm totally obsessed

with hair and hair-care products.

- Wait, what?

- Over here, g*ng. Picture time!

- Say cheese.

- Yes!

See that, katie?

You're gonna have to lock me up for carrying around these g*ns.

- Oh, yeah, they will.

Please let me go now.

- It's just for the day,

and he's got to have a great time

so we can move up pop tiger's cover ladder mega something.

please.

- Do not leave me alone with him.

- Say, kendall,

why don't you get this lady and I some smoothies?

- Uh.

- And by that I mean,

I'll tell the pop tiger lady our date was awesome.

- Smoothies, it is.

- So, katie, would you like-- - no.

- With the demutualized stock credit, a new ira account,

and extra deductions on footcare,

your tax return is...

- $,?

Oh, logey, this is the best date ever!

- ♪ 'Cause the world stops when I put my arms around ya ♪

♪ around ya oh, whoa ♪

♪ and nothing even matters, eh ♪

♪ and nothing even matters - ♪ eh

- ♪ it's like one for the haters ♪

♪ two for all of those who try to shut us down ♪

♪ they don't really know

♪ there ain't nothing they can do ♪

♪ that can tear us apart, no ♪

- ♪ this wall we built together ♪

♪ there ain't no way of knocking it over ♪

♪ we'll be here forever

- ♪ getting closer and closer, baby ♪

- ♪ 'cause the world stops when I put my arms around ya ♪

♪ around ya, oh, whoa ♪

♪ and nothing even matters, eh ♪

- oh, that was the best date of my life,

and we still have to hit santa monica pier, rodeo drive,

the place with all the famous footprints,

and my sister's.

But first,

help me off with my boots.

- I would love to,

but I've got to go do something real quick, okay?

Watch out!

Oh.

- What are you doing here?

You're supposed to be on your date.

- I've tried.

I know we have to climb the pop tiger cover,

but I can't take it anymore.

Get me out of this date.

Please. Please.

- Hey.

Where's bobby?

- Well, first he tried to kiss me,

then I threatened to punch him,

then he tried again, then I did punch him,

then I told him to get lost, and he did.

- He's gone?

- Hey. Where's bobby?

Boys are a huge new market for pop tiger,

so we are really excited about this playdate with you two.

- Yeah, bobby. Yeah, yeah.

Where isn't bobby?

- You didn't lose him, did you?

- What? No.

No!

But just out of curiosity,

what would happen if one did lose their pop tiger date?

- Oh, well, the magazine would have to distance itself

from a public relations scandal like that,

so I guess big time rush would be banned

from pop tiger for life.

- ♪ ah, ah, ah-ah, oh

- good thing I didn't lose him.

- So where's bobby?

- He went to get us smoothies.

- But you're holding smoothies.

- He wanted smoother smoothies.

- Oh, well, we will go get photos

of the other guys on their dates.

Can you and bobby meet us at the pool in minutes?

- Minutes? Perfect.

Bobby and I will see you in one hour.

- Okay.

- Smoother smoothies? - Yes.

- Hey, I just want to make sure

you dogs don't mess up your dates.

- Too late.

- I didn't lose him.

He's just...misplaced.

- Do you know what pop tiger will do

if they find out we've lost a kid?

- Yes, they will ban us from the magazine.

- They'll ban us from the magazine?

That is way worse than what I thought.

We have got to find that kid.

- First you want tiffany. Now you want jeanette.

All this switching seems mean.

- Exactly, which is why I'm trying to fix the switch

by switching back.

Meatball sub.

Ladies, it seems there's been a mix-up with the mix-up,

and the mix-up is, there was no mix-up.

- Seriously?

- So we'll just switch back and take you ladies

to our favorite hollywood hangout

and talk about hair products.

- Oh, that sounds great.

- So, tiffany,

you said that you were from newport, right?

What's it like there? - It's awesome.

My dad owns a combination

yacht club, roller-coaster park, ski resort.

- Rona, we apologize for the misunderstanding.

It's just that a typical pop tiger reader is under ,

not...

Way over under .

- That's okay. I understand.

I mean, I guess it was kind of silly

entering a teen magazine contest.

I'll just grab a cab to my sister's.

But your typical reader should know

what a sweet, handsome, kind young man lo-gain is.

- We're really sorry about how this turned out, logan.

- Oh, it's all good.

- You did write down the part

about logan being handsome, right?

- Okay, well, since we're down a couple,

we should probably double up on photos of kendall and bobby.

- Bobby. Bobby. Bobby. Bobby!

- Bob, come out, you big-time contest winner, you.

- Or don't!

- Check the cabanas.

[Woman screaming]

[man screaming]

[animal roars]

- don't panic.

There's still plenty of time to find him,

and we just have to find him, and--

[screaming]

- there you are. Time for that date photo.

Where's bobby?

- We don't know.

- We don't know because--

because--

- because he's the best hide and seek player ever.

- Yeah, that's what we're doing. Hide and seek.

That is the game that we're playing,

and it is fun.

- And don't you worry, 'cause we're gonna find

the little funster's hiding spot.

- I love it!

This'll be great in next month's spread.

Get some photos of kendall looking for bobby.

- Uh, come on!

- This place is so cool.

- Yeah, you know, the coffee's great.

You know what's really good?

The meatball sub.

- Well...

We're not hungry.

So how about you go get us some coffees, james?

[Chair breaks]

so are you girls looking forward to going to the party tonight?

[Phone vibrating and ringing]

I'm sorry, just a second. Sorry.

[Button beeps]

wrong number.

Um, as you were saying?

- Oh, it's gonna be so-- - well, I was wondering--

[phone vibrating] - sorry, just one second.

[Button beeps]

[sound of glass shattering]

okay, go on.

- Well, I was wondering--

- paging carlos garcia.

Mr. Carlos garcia, you have a call from mr. Schwartz.

- I'm gonna be right back.

I'm gonna go destroy someone.

- Carlos garcia. Carlos garcia.

- James, it is not fair to our dates

to keep switching back and forth.

I think that we should just focus on showing them

a good time before the party tonight.

- Playing hardball, huh?

What if I get you a monkey? - No.

- A butler? - No.

- A monkey butler? - [Gasps]

- let me guess...

Both: another mix-up?

- What are the odds?

[Horn honking]

- hey, someone need a taxi?

- Logey, are you driving me to my sister's?

- Nope, I'm driving you to the santa monica pier,

rodeo drive, the place with the famous handprints,

then to your sister's.

- But I thought I wasn't your typical pop tiger reader?

- Rona, there is nothing typical about you.

- [Laughs]

oh, logey, you sure know how to treat a lady.

- All right, buckle up.

- He's not in the minivan.

- He's not in the bushes.

- Try the lobby.

Oh, no. Try the bar.

- Lobby: bad idea!

So before we hit the party, this is palmwoods park,

where btr plays touch football,

where we hide in trees when necessary,

and...

Picks flowers for really cool girls.

- [Sneezes]

sorry, I have a really embarrassing sneeze.

- That's okay.

I know a lot of guys

who like cute sneezes like that.

In fact, james--

- hey, james.

- Hey, buddy. Can I get a word with you?

Now!

- What? We were having a moment there.

- No, you're ruining these dates.

- Which is why I should take jeanette to the party.

I mean, she sneezes so cute, and we belong together.

- I'm not switching anymore.

James, these dates are not about us.

It's about showing these two incredibly nice girls

a great day.

- You know what?

- There was another mix-up with the contest.

- I know!

I was supposed to be with jeanette all along.

Can you believe it?

- No, actually, tiffany and I are both

supposed to spend the day with carlos.

- I like this mix-up.

- Bobby. Bobby. - Bobby. Bobby.

- He's not in james. Let's go!

- Keep looking!

- Ah, what a day!

I saw all the sights,

and I got a lovely ride to my sister's.

- And I can't believe you punched out that sailor.

- Hey, he had it coming. What am i, a loaf of bread?

[Both laughing]

- so you go check in on your sister

and then we'll head over to the party.

- No, I think I'm gonna skip the party.

- Skip the party?

Then who am I gonna take as my date tonight, hmm?

- I have the perfect girl for you!

- Muriel, get out here and meet lo-gain of fast times rush.

My niece.

She's just like me, only not as good-looking.

[Laughing]

- auntie, that's logan from big time rush.

- It's pronounced lo-gain.

- hello, muriel.

- Hi.

- Bobby. Bobby. - Bobby. Bobby.

- Whoa!

- You did lose him, didn't you?

- No.

- Really?

Well, then tell me all about your date with bobby

so that I can report it,

and then show me bobby so we can go to the party.

Or you're banned from the magazine.

- Well, uh...

We chilled out in the crib, had a horsey-back ride,

played horseshoes in the park, and bobby has incredible g*ns,

and--oh-- and he wears a harness,

and just give him a couple pillows, and he could...

Live in the swirly slide.

Yes!

- He doesn't look very happy.

- Well, if he'd just apologize to my sister

for trying to smooch her--

- he can have one dance with me at the party.

- Holy schamoley!

I'm sorry, katie. I really am.

And thanks, kendall, for the best date ever.

- Did you write down that part

about him having the best date ever?

- Okay, well, let's get a photo, and then let's get to the party.

- So getting your final pictures for next month's big-time story?

- Yup, contest winners jeanette and tiffany

have a blast with carlos.

- Switch!

Switch!

- Logan makes a new friend from an older contest winner.

Bobby gets a dance with kendall's sister.

- Back it up. Back it up a little bit.

Back it up a little bit.

- Sort of.

- Easy, bobby. Easy, bobby.

- And james can't get enough of pop tiger's buffet.

- Another meatball sub?

- Hit me.

- Yup, this is definitely a cover story.

All: where on the cover?

♪ Ah, ah, ah-ah, oh

- ♪ get in gear

♪ go for broke, make it clear ♪

- ♪ got to go big time

- ♪ make it work, get it right ♪

♪ change the world overnight

- ♪ got to dream big time

- ♪ oh-oh, oh-oh

- ♪ hey, hey

- ♪ give it all you got now

- ♪ hey, hey

- ♪ isn't it a rush

- ♪ oh-oh, oh-oh

♪ oh-oh, oh-oh

- ♪ go and shake it up

♪ whatcha gotta lose

♪ go and make your luck with the life you choose ♪

♪ if you want it all, lay it on the line ♪

♪ it's the only life you got so you gotta live it big time ♪