02x27 - Big Time Secret

[bunniefuu]

- Okay, the game is called

"what's the worst thing you've ever done

to a person in this room that they don't know about?"

- Um... That game sounds dangerous.

And also not a game.

- Come on. I love secrets.

Let's play.

- Is big time rush afraid?

[Laughter]

guys: how do you play?

- I spin the spinner,

and whoever it lands on has to spill their secrets.

- All right. Here we go.

All: whoa!

James!

- Okay, um, carlos.

- Bring it.

- Remember that girl heather fox

you had a crush on at camp wonky donkey?

- Oh, yeah.

- Okay, well, she gave me a note saying that she liked you

but I threw it away and never told you

'cause I had a crush on her too.

Oh!

- She was the love of my life!

[Screaming]

crash!

[Screaming, shouting, grunting]

- or we could play a different game.

- ♪ Ah, ah, ah-ah, oh

- ♪ make it count, play it straight ♪

♪ don't look back, don't hesitate ♪

- ♪ when you go big time

- ♪ what you want, what you feel ♪

♪ never quit and make it real ♪

- ♪ when you roll big time

- ♪ oh-oh, oh-oh

- ♪ hey, hey

- ♪ listen to your heart now

- ♪ hey, hey

- ♪ don't you feel the rush

- ♪ uh-oh, uh-oh

♪ uh-oh, uh-oh

- ♪ oh

- ♪ go and shake it up

♪ whatcha gotta lose

♪ go and make your luck

♪ with the life you choose

♪ if you want it all, lay it on the line ♪

♪ it's the only life you got so you got to live it big time ♪

- it's been hours.

He's gonna burst any minute.

- And we'll be ready.

- How could you do this to me?

Heather was the love of my life.

- Understood.

But come on, dude,

you probably haven't thought about her in years.

- How could I not think about her?

She's the new face of live spokesmodel.

She's in every single magazine.

And she is in every single commercial.

- Hey. Want to bring your face alive?

And her name is tattooed right here.

- Okay, that is a temporary tattoo.

- I have been wronged!

[Screams]

- stop fighting!

[Indistinct chatter and gasping]

fresh snickerdoodles.

- I'll take nine.

Guys: oh, snickerdoodles!

- Oh, give me, give me, give me. Oh!

- So why aren't you guys at the studio?

- Oh, gustavo said don't come in.

- He's stuck on the last song of the new album.

- Very grumpy.

- Well, perhaps my snickerdoodles

will cheer him up.

- Why are you looking at me?

- You need to learn to be nicer.

- No.

I don't want to go.

- Let's go.

- Huh.

Now where were we?

Oh, yeah.

I was wronged!

- Okay, he is right.

And according to the best friend code,

when you wrong a friend, you have to make it right.

- You didn't forget the best friend code, did you?

- I'm well aware of the best friend code...

And the no dating ex-girlfriends code

and the don't borrow underwear code.

- What? It was one time.

- And I'm gonna make this right.

- See, this is exactly what happens

when you keep secrets from your friends.

Bye.

- Wait. Where are you going?

- None of your business.

- Well, hello, my new partner.

- They're all in the crib.

Let's go.

- I have been looking forward to this all morning.

[Both laugh]

- hey, logan.

I didn't know kendall and camille were dating now.

- Oh, yeah, they're totally--

what?

Hey!

- ♪ Because I

hate writing the last song!

I hate it!

- Ooh!

Sounds like someone could use

some of my homemade snickerdoodles.

- Or a better song.

- You, not helping.

You, keep a-talking.

- Uh...

We heard you were having trouble writing the last song.

And thought you deserved a snack.

- I always deserve a snack.

But a cookie is not gonna help me write the last song.

[Angelic choral music]

it's like I'm falling in love again for the first time.

- Wow.

- See, when you're family,

you do nice things for each other.

- Mrs. Knight, you have to give me this recipe.

- Never!

- Look.

I'm sorry about the whole summer camp heather note thing.

So to make it up to you...

Here.

- Corndogs?

You think that corndogs can fill the void

of a lifetime of love lost?

- They're gourmet!

- And they'll only fill half the void.

And you ruined heather too.

Where are her corndogs?

- What do you want me to do?

Call up her agent, pretend I'm somebody important

who wants to book her for a big job today?

So that you can see your long-lost camp crush?

Hello, I'm...

Oprah,

and I'd like to book spokesmodel heather fox

for a big job today.

Mm-hmm.

Oh, I see.

Yeah, well, that's too bad. Bye.

She's at colossal studios right now.

- Whoo!

I'm coming, heather!

[Screaming excitedly]

- hello, kendall.

- Hey...

Buddy.

Scared me.

- [Laughs maniacally] I didn't mean to scare you.

What were you doing all day, hmm?

- Nothing, just-- just chilling.

- Sounds like fun.

Who were you chilling with?

- Nobody.

I was just doing stuff.

- I like stuff.

Where were you doing this, um... Stuff?

- Nowhere.

In fact, I think I left some of the stuff nowhere,

so...

- Hi. - Did you tell logan about us?

- I didn't tell anyone.

You told me not to.

But maybe we should.

- No!

They cannot know I broke the code.

- Okay, last song finished yet?

- Check it.

[Sentimental piano music]

♪

♪ Snickerdoodle

♪ on my noodle

♪ went to my

♪ big caboodle

♪ I love snickerdoodles

[piano chord flourish]

- I can't stop thinking about those snickerdoodles either.

- I can't focus until I get the recipe!

- Way ahead of you.

- Why did you send a car for me?

- Katie!

We need your mom's snickerdoodle recipe.

- Never gonna happen.

She won't even tell me until I'm .

- Katie...

We're freaking out.

- Fine.

I'll get you the recipe...

For grand.

A finder's fee, a snicker fee, a doodle fee.

- We'll give you $,

and don't push us?

- Done.

- [Sighing]

- just act like everything's normal.

- Oh, wait till she sees me again.

She's gonna want to hug me and kiss me.

- Action!

- So bring your face alive with face alive.

- Cut. That was great.

That's a wrap, everybody.

- Thank you.

- [Whistling]

so sorry. - Sorry.

Heather.

Heather fox?

James diamond

and carlos garcia.

- From camp wonky donkey.

Both: hee-haw!

- Oh, yeah! I remember you guys.

- We're in a band now.

It's called big time rush.

And we're sh**ting a cool video...

[Laughs]

on the lot.

- Oh-ho, wow.

That's totally cool.

Hey, we should catch up over lunch some time.

Good luck sh**ting your video.

Bye!

- Huh.

- I should be married!

[Screams]

- logan, it's none of my business,

and I'd like to stay out of it.

- Fine.

Let's just play one of your fun party games.

Like the "tell me what you saw in the lobby" game.

If the arrow lands on you,

you tell me what you saw in the lobby.

- Fine.

I saw them do this.

- They're secretly dating.

That is totally forbidden

according to the ex-girlfriend code.

- We don't know they're dating.

- You know what? You're right.

I have to prove that he broke the ex-girlfriend code

before I unleash the fists of fury.

[Grunting and screaming]

according to the fists of fury code.

But I'm gonna need your help.

- No.

- Okay, fine.

Then let's just play another fun game.

- I don't like the "put a tree hat on

and hide in the bushes" game.

- You look great. Okay, here comes the shuttle.

- That was very fun.

- And let me say, your moves are very smooth.

- He has terrible moves.

- What? Why are you pushing me?

Kendall! What are you--

- I'm pretty sure I saw a tree hat wiggling

out of my peripherals.

They're on to us.

You are paranoid.

- Well, you would be too

if you were hiding a terrible secret from your friends.

We should have never done this.

- But kendall, darling,

we're just figure skating.

- Shh!

Somebody might hear you!

- Okay, what is the figure skating code?

- Growing up, hockey players and figure skaters

were constantly at w*r for ice time.

And they are awful people with toe picks.

And we vowed never to figure skate...

Ever.

- Hey.

I'm a figure skater, and I'm not awful.

- Yes, but minnesota pairs figure skating champs

chet and mimi camerelli were.

They called us cavemen on skates

and made fun of our dull and bulky uniforms.

And they said that we could never

do a double sow cow or death spiral

if we tried.

- So why are you figure skating?

- Because I vowed that someday I would prove

that hockey players are just as good as figure skaters.

And with your help,

I will prove it at tomorrow's competition.

But first... Slam!

We have to figure out a way to get out of this closet

without the entire palmwoods thinking

that we're making out.

- Well, that's easy.

I'm an actress.

Watch out, people!

Got a busted pipe on three!

Move out of my way!

- Huh.

I did not know the palmwoods got a new janitor.

- That was them, genius.

- What?

- Oh, how could she forget our camp memories?

The way she laughed at my victory dance

when I won the sack race.

- Nobody could b*at you.

- Or how I would give her my perfectly toasted marshmallows.

- You were the best chef on the lake.

- And that camp squirrel we used to feed...

Nutty cumberdale.

Oh, and what about that time

that we accidentally got our hands glued together

while making birdhouses?

- [Sighs]

she was literally stuck on you.

But I did my best today,

which is in complete accordance with the best friend code.

- But you have not fulfilled the try harder code.

- We don't have a try harder code!

- Oh, we do now.

And you're breaking it!

- What do you want me to do?

Take you both back in time to wonky donkey

so she'll fall in love with you again?

Both: welcome to camp wonky donkey!

♪ Where you'll have a wonky donkey day ♪

hee-haw!

- I must admit, I was a little intrigued

when I got a wonky donkey invitation

from the one and only nutty cumberdale.

- Ooh!

Here is your t-shirt

and today's camp schedule.

- So go get changed,

and get ready for a day of wonky donkey fun!

Both: hee-haw!

- Okay.

- Mom?

I'm mature now.

I've put down comic books for magazines,

I use your credit card all the time,

and I'm ready for that recipe.

- Family code says I can't give you the recipe card

until you're .

- Yes, but if you tell me the recipe,

then the code is not broken.

- Well,

in that case...

You take two frying pans,

and...

Clang! [Both screaming]

- that was so not cool.

- Mom, gustavo needs to know

what makes those cookies so delicious.

- Then we could make some,

and he could focus and finish the second album.

- You're not getting the recipe.

- Tell us your secret now, kendall's mom,

before this gets ugly.

- You want to know my secret?

Fine.

This color isn't real.

So now I'm off to the salon.

- Huh.

Looks so natural.

- Yes, and when you're hiding something,

you tend to look to make sure it's safe.

- Let's make some cookies!

- Go!

Both: no!

- Well, if it isn't the code-breakers.

You know, I thought you guys were cool,

but you're dating behind logan's back?

- We're figure skating.

- Oh, so you're figure skating behind logan's back and...

Wait. What?

- We're not dating.

We're skating.

- That's great.

I'll go tell logan.

- Oh, no!

Because then he'll know I broke the figure skating code.

And you can't tell him because of the new friend code.

- Yeah. - Okay.

I am really hating these codes.

- We just have one more practice,

then the competition tonight,

and then we're done sneaking around.

- Don't leave through the lobby.

Logan's hiding in the vending machine area.

- In a tree hat by the ferns?

- No.

He's in the vending machine.

- Just tell me what you want!

Kids: ♪ camp wonky donkey

♪ here is our wonky song

♪ we laugh and run and skip and play ♪

♪ and sing it all day long

♪ the campfire's roaring

♪ so won't you take a seat?

♪ At camp wonky donkey

♪ our summers can't be b*at

♪ you'll see our smiling faces

♪ you'll dine on hard-boiled meat ♪

♪ you'll go to friendly places

♪ you'll dance out in the street ♪

♪ so good-bye, teachers

♪ hello, fun

♪ good-bye, pencils

♪ hello, sun

[energetic music]

♪

♪ Camp wonky donkey

♪ right here on wonky lake

♪ swimming, diving, paddle hard ♪

♪ on boats that we made

♪ we're gonna get treated

♪ with arts and crafts

♪ we'll get poison ivy

♪ and sleep on paddle drafts

♪ you'll see our smiling faces

♪ you'll dine on hard-boiled meat ♪

♪ you'll go to friendly places

♪ you'll dance out in the street ♪

♪ so good-bye, teachers

♪ hello, fun

♪ good-bye, pencils

♪ hello, sun

♪ at camp wonky donkey

♪ we hope you like our songy

♪ we swim and splash and jump and crash ♪

♪ we laugh and run and burn in sun ♪

♪ and whine and cry and miss our moms ♪

♪ and sing this

♪ all day long

- I bet there's nothing going on.

And after tonight you'll never see them sneaking around again.

- What do you know?

You have a secret.

Reveal it, by the order of the reveal it code.

- Yeah, well, I can't,

because of the stupid new friend code.

- You're in on it.

- I'm not in on anything,

except realizing you're all weird.

- You seen your hair lately?

And...

I'm borrowing this.

[Laughs maniacally]

- hey.

Try and avoid the lobby when you come back.

There's an a*-wielding maniac looking for you.

Ding! - Go!

Take the stairs! Take the stairs!

- Boo! - [Screams]

[screaming]

[crowd screaming]

ding! - Cookie time!

- We win!

Your mom loses.

[Laughs maniacally]

[spitting and shrieking]

- oh, how's the baking going?

- You planted a fake recipe card?

- Yeah. - [Sighs]

I told you the bottle caps and toothpaste

didn't sound right.

- Well, if I didn't plant a fake recipe card,

you guys would have torn up the whole apartment looking for it,

and then I'd have to clean it up.

- Oh, that is not true.

- Yes, it is. - [Stammers]

well, maybe that's true.

But the bottom line is, we need to finish the second album.

And we can't do it without your recipe.

- And you're always saying how we're family,

so why don't you give us the secret family recipe

because I'm over !

- If you want me to be nicer, you should set a better example.

- Fine.

Ugh!

You take a tube of ready-made snickerdoodle dough

and add sugar.

- Okay, how is that a secret recipe?

- The secret is...

I forgot about a peewee hockey bake sale.

So I bought this, added this,

and then everybody wanted my recipe,

so I made up the part about the secret family recipe

because I'm a loser, okay?

- You add a whole bag of sugar?

- Do you want the recipe or not?

- We can finish the album!

[Horn honks]

- okay, now don't forget your second place

sack race trophy.

And...

Your birdhouse...

Which is still a little bit sticky.

- We hope you had a good time.

- Who wouldn't want to go back to wonky donkey?

Both: hee-haw!

- And carlos,

could you walk me to my car alone?

- [Yelps]

- I want to tell you something.

I have a huge crush...

On james.

Could you give him this note?

I get really nervous, you know.

- Yeah, totally.

- Hee-haw!

- Ooh!

Looks like someone got a phone number.

- It's for you.

- What? - She likes you.

- Heather fox likes me? [Laughter]

that's--

not worth it.

- [Gasps] what are you doing?

Heather fox likes you!

- Well, supermodel spokesgirls will come and go,

I hope.

But best friends, forever.

Smack! Squish!

Unbelievable. - Come on!

- Hey, guys.

- Ignore us!

- [Laughs maniacally]

[screaming]

- stop, please. [Guys muttering]

- what is going on?

- Kendall broke a code, but I can't tell you which code

because of the new friend code.

- Kendall broke a code?

[Both scream]

- okay, let's get in there, skate our routines,

get out before anybody sees us and--

[screams]

- taxis are so much faster than shuttle busses.

Ha!

- You broke a code!

- Come here. Pop!

- Just tell them the truth,

'cause this is getting out of control.

- [Sighs]

okay.

Logan, guys,

camille and I are...

In love.

Guys: he broke the code!

- Kendall! - Okay, fine.

The code I broke is...

[Guys scream]

- he's figure skating.

Thud!

- And I'm better now.

- Okay, but we hate figure skaters.

- No.

We hated the camerellis.

And they always said we couldn't do it.

And yes, the outfit is hideous.

But I always said that I would prove them wrong.

And I didn't tell you guys because of the code.

- Well, in that case,

go get 'em, my shiny, glittery best bud.

- You prove the camerellis wrong.

And skate!

Skate like the wind!

- Wait, you guys aren't mad?

- [Sighs] no.

We're...

Proud of you.

Now, you get out there and show the world that hockey skaters

can skate just as good as figure skaters.

- All right! [All cheering]

- whoo!

- Yeah!

- [Sighs] wow, you were awful.

- He was.

- Yeah, really bad.

- Now I know why they call it a death spiral.

- [Yelps] okay, we tried it.

It's over.

And camille's jaw is healing, right?

- [Grunts]

- okay, let's just play a simple,

non-violent game of truth or dare.

- I like it.

- Ready.

- Truth or dare.

All: oh!

- It's me!

- Okay, carlos, truth or dare?

- Truth.

[Screaming]

- why would you do that to me?

[All shouting indistinctly]

- ♪ step it up, get in gear ♪

♪ go for broke, make it clear ♪

- ♪ got to go big time

- ♪ hey, hey

- ♪ make it work, get it right ♪

♪ change the world overnight

- ♪ got to dream big time

- ♪ oh-oh, oh-oh

- ♪ hey, hey

- ♪ give it all you got now

- ♪ hey, hey

- ♪ isn't it a rush

- ♪ oh-oh, oh-oh

♪ oh-oh, oh-oh

- ♪ go and shake it up

♪ whatcha gotta lose

♪ go and make your luck with the life you choose ♪

♪ if you want it all, lay it on the line ♪

♪ it's the only life you got so you got to live it big time ♪