02x29 - Big Time Move

[bunniefuu]

[Lasers zapping]

- bio hazhard battle blast :crotchy returns

is the best game ever.

- Okay,you can stop saying that now.

- Ohh.

- Carlos,don't blow up the a*mo.

I was saving that for later.

- Yeah, and I wantedthe platinum controller.

- No, no, no.

- Augh!

- James,you betrayed me?

- You're slowing us down.

- I was watching your back.

- Yeah,and you're really bad at it.

- Oh, oh,yeah, well, am I bad at this?

Ahh!

[All arguing]

- please, stop.

Have you guys noticedwe can't spend five minutes

together latelywithout fighting?

- Auuugh!

- [Laughs]

arrgh!

- Auuugh!

- Well,i can't live like this anymore,

so I'm moving out.

- Oh,way ahead of you here, boy.

- Wait,where did you get the--

- I am so not gonna missany of you.

Carlos out.

- James out.

[All arguing]

- nobody is moving out.

Now,we have been friends forever,

and we're perfectly capable ofspending five minutes together

without fighting,right?

[Together]he's right. Yes. Fine. Yeah.

- I hate all of you.

- Do not follow me.

- I'm moving out.

- ♪ Ah, ah, ah-ah, oh

- ♪ make it count,play it straight ♪

♪ don't look back,don't hesitate ♪

- ♪ when you go big time

- ♪ what you want,what you feel ♪

♪ never quitand make it real ♪

- ♪ when you roll big time

- ♪ oh-oh, oh-oh

- ♪ hey, hey

- ♪ listen to your heart now

- ♪ hey, hey

- ♪ don't you feel the rush

- ♪ uh-oh, uh-oh

♪ uh-oh, uh-oh

- ♪ oh

- ♪ go and shake it up

♪ whatcha gotta lose

♪ go and make your luck

♪ with the life you choose

♪ if you want it all,lay it on the line ♪

♪ it's the only life you gotso you got to live it big time ♪

- mr. Bitters,we are moving out.

- Yes!

[Upbeat music]

[horn tooting]

- no, not out of the palmwoods.

[Horn toots]

- okay, look,we want our own apartments.

- All right, I will needa security deposit,

first and last months' rent,key fee,

a parking fee,and a fee-fee

for total of $, each.

[Together]i'm so out of here, man.

Don't talk to me.

- Hey, bitters,i'm finally taking

that kayak touraround the world,

so I won't be needing these.

- Have a palmwoods time.

- Have you guys been fightingagain?

- It was a mild skirmish.

- I thought I told you guysto go outside and play.

- Mom, we're not eight anymore,

and the new video game we boughtis inside,

and we'll be fine.

- Arrgh.

- How bad was it?

- They packed their suitcasesand moved out.

- They moved out?

- I don't know whywe're fighting so much.

- It's starting.

- What's starting?

- You're growing apartand this friendship

wouldn't be the firstto be destroyed

by the intense pressuresof hollywood.

- Well, you know what?

That's not gonna happen to us.

And you know why?

Because I have a plan.

- You're gonna get gustavoto yell at them

and make them move back?

- And now if have a better plan.

Thanks, katie.

- Look, the new albumis called <span>all over again,</span>

so I want this tour to be called

the "all over the world tour."

- Yeah, well,germany won't call us back,

and australia won't answerany of our email.

- Ahhh.

- Gustavo,we have a problem.

- I know.

We're booking our world tour,

and the worldwon't call us back.

- Actually, no.

Me and the guysgot in a huge fight,

and they moved out.

[Together]they moved out?

- Yeah, so can you yell at themand get them to come back

so we can be friends again?

- Yes, because I do not needthis band breaking up

before oursoon-to-be world tour.

Plus,i love to yell.

- Can you please not spikea banana peel?

And pick that up before you slipon it and throw your back out.

- Oh, please.that only happens in cartoons.

[Back cracking]

- [gasps]- my back.

- Oh, this looks bad.- Yeah.

- I can't move...or yell.

- Maybe it's not so bad.

- Oh, yes, it is, because heneeds to get to the palmwoods

so he can fix us.

- [Whispering] kendall,you have to do it yourself.

You have to keepthis band together.

And, kelly, call doc hollywood.

- You know, I've never heard himwhisper before.

- [Whispering]i will destroy all of you.

- Oh, okay.okay, okay.

- Kendall,so not nice to see you.

Now, get off my lawn, please.thank you.

- There is no lawn.

And what is this?

- Ahh, I always wanted a placeby the water.

It's so peaceful and doesn'thave any of my...ex-friends.

- Look, will you just come backto the crib,

and we can figure this out?

Because you can't livein a cabana your whole life.

- No, but...

The cabana sign-in sheetgoes up to two years,

and look at who's booked it.

- Huh?- Me.

- Ohhh.- Now, get off my lawn, hmm?

- There is no lawn,

and I'm sorrythat we were fighting.

But what will it take to get youto come back to the crib?

- I want carlos and jamesto apologize too.

Then--hmm--i'll think about it.

- Done.

Hey, do you happen to knowwhere they are?

- I don't care, but carlos didsay he always wanted a place

overlooking the park.

- Who is it?

- It's kendall.

- I'll be right there.

[Footsteps tapping]

[door squeaking openand shutting]

[footsteps tapping]

- what do you want?

- Hmm, I want you to move backinto the crib

and to not live in a box.

- What are you talking about?

This box house is awesome.

I've got a lovely viewof the park,

my own bathroom,and a modern kitchen.

[Timer dings]

ooh, one second.

Cookie?

[Sniffs]

- okay,so your box house is cool,

but so is the cribwith a swirly slide

and video gamesand best friends,

and if you just apologizeto logan,

we can all be best friendsagain.

- No, not until jamesapologizes to me

for tossing my helmet cereal

- yeah, well, that's a problem,because nobody knows

where james...is.

- What are you doing?

- Retiring.

Retiring from the crib,the fights,

and my former friends.

- Whose place is this?

- Does it matter?

- It might.

- Here's what matters.

Moving out of the criband into here

was my best move ever.

I clap,and things happen.

[Claps]

[light jazzy music]

and I don't need to sharemy hard candies with anyone.

- And you have no friends here.

- Wrong again.

Ooh.

- Senior alert.is everything okay?

- Oh, yeah.everything's great.

Thank you.how are you today?

- Oh, uh, I'm good.thanks.

- Okay.

Okay, I don't know whywe're fighting so much,

but we have been friendsforever,

and we have a maybe world tourcoming up,

so would you please apologizeto carlos

so that we can apologizeto logan,

and don't say you'll only do itif logan apologizes

to you first.

I said not to say that.

Arrgh.

- Why am I on this table?

- Doc hollywood said you have tolie flat on a hard surface.

- Where is doc hollywood?

- sh**ting his reality series,

but he said he's sending overthe best in the business.

- And that would be me,

chantal, alternative healerand spiritual advisor

to the stars.

- No, no, no.

No robe-y quacks.

- That's what johnny depp saiduntil I cured his halitosis...

With my palms.

- Cure me.

I have to get up and get ouralmost world tour going.

Augh.

- % Of all ailmentsare in the mind,

so we must trick this mind

into getting him off this table.

- Auuugh!

Crash!

- Okay, now we knowit's not in his mind.

[Gong resounds]

[rock music]

♪

- I miss them, but at leasti get the platinum controller.

- You were too nice to them.

- Katie,they're my best friends.

- You have to manipulate them.

- Go on.

- They want apologies?

Then give them apologies.

- But they won't apologize.

- And that's where manipulationcomes in.

- If carlos is so sorry,

why doesn't he come hereand say so himself, huh?

- You know carlos and his pride.

But he told me to tell you thathe's making you a special lunch

to show you just how sorryhe is.

- James wants to make mea special lunch?

Why doesn't he just tell mehe's sorry?

- Oh,you know him and his pride.

- What's he making me?

- A nice healthy salad.

- Well...

Logan does knowi prefer a light lunch.

- And you know he's gota lot of pride,

so I wouldn't even mentionthe apology

and just enjoy the lunchhe made you.

- Hmm.

- Sounds like a nice lunch,james.

- This is really good.

- You know how muchi love toast.

- And has anyone noticedthat it's been five minutes,

and we haven't fought?

- Yeah.

You know, I don't even know whywe fought in the first place.

[Together]i know. Ditto.

- So let's all renewour friendship

with a littlebio hazard battle blasting

and never fight again.

[Together]yes! Whoo!

[All arguing]

- put down the laptop right now.

- No, you tell himto put down my helmet.

- Not until I getmy lucky comb back.

Oh, you mean this comb?

[All arguing]

- well, counting lunch, you madeit minutes without fighting.

- So it's getting better,right?

Not the platinum controller.

[Light jazzy music]

- I don't know whywe're fighting so much.

- You're growing apart.

Most adolescent friendshipseventually decay

due to distrust and--

- I mean, last week,we were singing

and getting readyfor a might-be world tour,

and now we're not even talking.

- Why don't you just be honestwith them

and tell them how muchyou miss them?

- Uh, yeah,guys don't do that, mom.

- Oh, yeah,but the manipulation thing

worked out real well for ya.

- Yeah,why did you do that?

- Well, how am I supposed toget them all together

to say anything?

- With love.

Love fixes lots of things,okay?

- You know what?

You're right, becausethe one thing we all love is...

Bio hazard battle blast .

I'll create the ultimate

tournament of championschallenge

that they have to come backto the crib for.

- Or you could go outsideand play.

- Nah,my way is better.

- Ugh.

[Telephones ringing]

- well,what about switzerland?

They like everything.

- Not big time rush,nor finland or norway.

- I just need oneinternational city to make it

the all over the world tour.

Augh.

- What you needis to free your mind

from all its negativity

and let the hot healing stonesof healing

draw out the pain in your back.

- Well,the stones aren't even hot.

- My bad.

- Whoa, whoa, no flame.

- Back off.- Auugh.

- Back off.this cured the queen's eczema.

- Oof, oof, oof, oof.

- Give it to me.- Auuugh!

- Give it to me.

[Doorbell rings]

[doorbell continues ringing]

[doorbell continues ringing]

[claps]

[light jazzy music]

- [yawns]

bills, bills...

Urgent plea from rob lowe.

What's this?

"Do you havewhat it takes to win

"the ultimate bio hazardbattle blast tournament

of champions challenge?"

- "Where: the crib.

"When: :.

Be thereand win the ultimate prize."

- I swore I'd nevergo back there

or talk to them again.

- Yeah, james, my supervisorsaid I can't talk to you anymore

unless it's a real emergency.

- Wait.this is an emergency.

I'm lonely.

[Telephone rings]

- kelly wainright,b.t.r. Tour manager.

- [Groans]

- yes!

- What?augh!

Ow.

- We are playing vancouver,canada,

which means b.t.r.'Sall over the world tour...is on.

- Yes!ohhh. Augh.

- Technically,that's a north american tour.

You need to play anothercontinent for a world tour.

- Not helping.augh!

- And you need to fix him,so he can move again.

- My record is perfect,

but my positive vibeshave never faced

such negative blocks before.

Oooh-ahh.

- Look, our albumis called <span>all over again,</span>

so do what you're doingall over again until he's fixed.

- Then I will resort to morewestern chiropractic methods.

- Ehh, ohh, ahh.

- I'll cr*ck the vertebra,thereby creating a space

to let the good vibes in.

- Huh?ahhh!

- Okay,this guy's basically unhealable.

- I'm gonna beon my back forever

with no world tour.

- Wait, perhaps if chantaluses an unorthodox method

to heal him.

- Uhh?

- No, no, no.no acupuncture.

- Actually,i'm the spiritual advisor

to sir huge concert promoterin england,

and I'm simplygoing to advise him

to book a big time rush concertin london.

- Yes!

My back.

It's healed.

- And as long as kendall'shealed the guys' friendship...

Big time rush is goingon a world tour.

- It's :.

They're not coming.

- Hey, first thing tomorrow,we're gonna go to the mall

and get you some new friends.

[All arguing]

- hey,where's the prize?

- Yeah, the flyer sayswe can win the ultimate prize,

so where is it?

- The prize is our friendship.

- I hate that prize.

Now,i am walking out of here.

- Same here.

- Fine, walk out on a lifetimeof friendship

because of one bad week.

- I smell speech.

- [Sniffs]i hate that smell.

- [Whispers]i hate you.

- Hey.

- Carlos,who tutored you in math

every night when youwere struggling in algebra?

- [Silently]- logan.

- And, logan,who was there to protect you

when you called thewrestling team jerks in latin?

- James.

- But <span>gladiatoris es stupides.</Span>

just saying.

- And, james, who ran milesto the nearest drugstore

when you ran out of hair gelin the sixth grade dance?

- [Sighs]carlos.

Here's your helmet back.

- Ohh.

- Here's your lucky comb.

- Ooh.

- Ooh, uh, here's your laptop.

- You know what?just keep it.

- You know,i still don't know why

we've been fightingthis whole time.

[Together]but it stops now.

- Finally.

So who wants to playbio hazard battle blast ?

[All arguing]

- they're fighting again.

- I don't get it.

We were just gonna play a game.

A game.

It's the game.

The fighting started last weekwhen we bought the game.

- He might have a point.

- Think about it.

- Ah, look who's ranked higherthan carlitos

on the page five leaderboard.

Nice.

- Auuugh!

[All arguing]

- oh, really?

[Together]auugh!

- Okay, but wait.

What about my cereal helmet?

- Well, I was sittingat the counter

when I thought abouthow my cereal

looked like the surfaceof ring dar seven,

and that reminded mehow carlos wouldn't share

any of his ring darpower crystals

in our earlier campaign,

so I took it out on his helmet.

- Auuugh!

- Huh?

Well, that makes sense.

- Are you guys fighting again?

I swear I am gonna takethat video game away from you.

[Together] take it.we're are done with this.

- Good.

So now maybe you will finallygo outside and play.

- Mom, we're not eight.

- Dust off your passports,

'cause big time rush'sall over the world tour is a go.

[Together]ohhh. Yes.

- With tour dates in the u.s.,Canada, and london.

- Whoo!

[Together]we're going to england?

- And we need to startrehearsal now.

- Okay.

[Together] looks likewe're playing outside.

- ♪ Oh, ohhhh

- ♪ still got that same lookthat sets me off ♪

♪ guess there's just somethingabout you ♪

♪ I've got these feelingsto let it show ♪

♪ 'cause I wouldn't let you go

♪ I shouldn't have let you go

- ♪ you asked mefor closure before ♪

♪ and girl I told youit's over ♪

♪ it's over

♪ it's not over

♪ so here we go again yeah

all: ♪ it's like I'm fallingin love all over again ♪

♪ for the first timeand I know that it feels right ♪

♪ I think I'm falling in loveall over again ♪

♪ love at first sight

♪ do you know how I feel

♪ to the left, left, left

♪ on the right, right, right

♪ to the back, back, back

♪ on the side, side, side

♪ to the left, left, left

♪ on the right, right, right

♪ to the back, back, back

♪ on the side, side,side tonight ♪

- ♪ baby there's somethingthat you did ♪

♪ to hold me on

♪ maybe there's just somethingthat just keeps me ♪

♪ from moving on

- ♪ your love is static

♪ it pulls me in

♪ like a songwhen it first begins ♪

♪ I'm ready to go yeah

all: ♪ it's like I'm fallingin love all over again ♪

♪ for the first timeand I know that it feels right ♪

♪ I think I'm falling in loveall over again ♪

♪ love at first sight

♪ do you know how I feel

♪ to the left, left, left

♪ on the right, right, right

♪ to the back, back, back

♪ on the side, side, side

♪ to the left, left, left

♪ on the right, right, right

♪ to the back, back, back

♪ on the side, side,side tonight ♪

[cheers and applause]

- I love itwhen they play outside.

- Big time rush world tour,here we come.

[Cheers and applause]

- ♪ step it up,get in gear ♪

♪ go for broke,make it clear ♪

- ♪ got to go big time

- ♪ hey, hey

- ♪ make it work,get it right ♪

♪ change the world overnight

- ♪ got to dream big time

- ♪ oh-oh, oh-oh

- ♪ hey, hey

- ♪ give it all you got now

- ♪ hey, hey

- ♪ isn't it a rush

- ♪ oh-oh, oh-oh

♪ oh-oh, oh-oh

- ♪ go and shake it up

♪ whatcha gotta lose

♪ go and make your luckwith the life you choose ♪

♪ if you want it all,lay it on the line ♪

♪ it's the only life you gotso you got to live it big time ♪