01x09 - Jamming with Edward

[bunniefuu]

Here, nobody, here.

Always, alone.

JAMMING WITH EDWARD

th district is sunny,

Slight rock showers.

Chance of rock showers today is %.

th district is cloudy,

Chance of rock showers
this afternoon is %.

Bebop, here, here! Welcome!

Chance of rock showers today is %…

Now, it’s time for today’s news topics.

Today, we’ll discuss the
mysterious land paintings…

…that suddenly appeared in
what was South America.

As usual, we have commentaries by a
researcher of supernatural phenomena…

Me, Yuuri Kellerman.

Yuuri, about these land paintings…

Yes, yes. Well, I believe that it
was some sort of a message.

Um, who would it be from…?
Can it be…?

Aliens!
It has to be from aliens!

However, the land paintings were drawn
by lasers coming from satellites…

The police think it was a prank pulled
by a hacker who got into the satellite.

They already have a bounty of
million woolongs on the culprit…

Listen carefully, The bounty of million
is a conspiracy of the government.

Even if it was drawn by a laser,
there is the possibility…

…that aliens put a message
into the brain of that hacker.

Once again, the government is
hiding something from us.

I see… A secret cult…

Yes! And that is the mystery that I
have been searching for all this time!

I’ll pass on this one after all.

You’re leaving me alone with her?

Nothing wrong with it.
She’s gung-ho about it.

I’m not the type to be
led around by women.

Then lead her around.

I’m even less the type to do that.

It’s easier to…

…divide million
between two than three.

Here we go.

I’m appalled. You’re afraid of hackers?

I just hate tedious work like that.

Guys cheap enough to hack into things
are depressed pale fatsos with glasses.

And I’m sure he’s a demented
otaku with smelly feet.

Piece of cake!

Do you have something
against someone like that?

I mean, they might’ve all been
like that when you were young…

You’re saying I look older than you?

You can’t tell a woman’s age
just by looking at her.

Exactly.

You can’t tell just by looking
that I can do things like this…

That’s all I know of you.

You guys make a good team.

Hurry up!

I’ll be waiting for
a souvenir from Earth.

There’s nothing made
on Earth that’s good.

Well…

About this incident…
apparently, a pretty…

…old artificial satellite
has been hacked into.

The investigation is taking
longer than expected because…

…the access code to that
satellite has been long lost.

Now, a commentary from Mr. Amjad.

Yes, yes.

About the relationship between
Earth and the hacker…

Yes. Since the Gate
accident years ago…

…the people of Earth have
migrated underground as a result…

…of the change in climate, namely,
moon rocks falling onto the planet.

To them, the ’space network’
created by computers is…

…necessary for them to stay in
contact with those living in space.

I see.

That’s becoming a foundation
to create outstanding hackers.

Radical Edward!

It’s the police! Come out!

Yeah!

What? What’s wrong?

I saw it!

Why!?

There’s nobody in there!

Mistake, mistake.

Okay.

This is where the satellite
was when it was hacked.

This is where it could
be accessed from.

I’ll look at all the antennae that
can transmit light signals one by one.

I’ll ask around for info on any
prominent hackers in the area.

Bebop’s lookin’ for
land picture criminal…

All right!

Satellite of long, long ago…

Where in the world
is your access code?

Okay. Let’s start with all the antennae
that are currently communicating…

That’s probably Ed, man.

I hear he’s a huge guy, meters tall.

Supposedly, he used to
be a basketball player.

Yeah, I know Ed.

Radical Edward.

I hear she’s a very beautiful
yet whimsical hacker.

No, no, that hacker is a child.

A brat that loves
horrible pranks, I hear.

Oh, what I heard from the lady next
door is that that hacker is gay.

Hacker? You mean Ed?

He’s an alien!

That’s what everyone says!

Hey, man!

Can you buy some of this
as the price for the info?

What is that?

You don’t know?

It’s “Piyoko,” a well-known
specialty of Earth!

The stolen satellites…

Where are you?

Huh? What’s this?

The information isn’t
connected to Earth.

It’s connected only
between satellites.

And nobody hacked into it…

Here, nobody, here.

Always, alone.

A voice… inside… head…

Who are you?

Eh? What? What did you just say?

Who, you? Here, always.

Edward. A ’net diver from Earth.

Earth?

Yup. Hey, what’s your name?

I am the satellite control program
on the D- artificial satellite.

What’s that? Don’t you have a nickname?

Then Ed will give you one.

I know!

Because you’re a computer,
you can be MPU!

MPU! Cool name!

Um…

Ed is Edward Wong Hau
Pepelu Tivrusky the fourth.

Ed for short.

Nice to meet you!

Here. A souvenir from Earth.

Is this food?

It makes me doubt that
they have any sense.

Unlike you, I learned some information.

They said that an unknown hacker named
Radical Edward is the suspicious one.

It doesn’t mean anything
if he’s unknown.

I know, more or less.

It seems okay.

What kinda thing is it?

meters tall. Ex-basketball player.
Beautiful kid.

And on top of it, a gay alien.

Why did you doodle on Earth?

Long, long ago,
long before the Gate accident…

Earth was a beautiful planet
where many people lived.

And back then on Earth,
there were many…

…pictures like this,
and I always looked at them.

I remembered those times…

…and I tried to recreate
at least the pictures.

I see, doodles like this were
on Earth long ago, too…

Yes. I recreated them with
a % margin of error.

MPU is good at drawing.
Can Ed draw something, too?

Huh? What’s wrong?

This is…

The police are putting
out a jamming signal.

Hey! MPU! He-e-e-y!

Looks like the cops touched base
with Radical Edward as well.

Listen! I found your bounty

What the?

Bebop!

The real culprit in the
satellite-jacking wasn’t a hacker!

Since when do we have
an interactive channel?

No, that’s not it.

This is a real-time hack job.

Who is this kid?

I’ll send you MPU’s data now.

Wait a minute, what is MPU?

A friend of Ed’s.

Hey, do you know Ed?

Yeah, because Ed is Ed.

I don’t care about that. Who did it?

Um… I could tell you.

But I have a favor to ask in return.

A favor?

Yeah, yeah.
Yer big sister will listen to ya later.

Come on, hurry it up.

I see. The A.I. from the abandoned
satellite is doodling of its own will.

What? What’s up?

And on top of that,
it was supposedly listed as…

…a weather satellite,
so nobody suspected anything.

Then this satellite is our bounty?

Since the access code to
MPU can’t be used anymore…

…you need to go directly,
to the satellite.

And what do we do?

Break the antennae that it uses to
communicate with the other satellites.

Then make a direct connection
to the satellite and download MPU.

And when you do, don’t use computer
support for f*ring or flying.

What? All manual?

Yup. If it notices you,
all the att*ck satellites…

…connected to MPU will
automatically fire back.

Is this hard?

It’s not just hard,
it’s downright impossible.

It’s like playing baseball with no bat!

Hey, Spike.

That’s the kind of stuff I like.

Hey! Wait, you.
How do you know about us?

I know everything.

Last week, you let Ajiz, a bounty on
Mars worth . million, get away…

And in Pyortle before that,
the police got to them first…

Are you really that
hacker Radical Edward!?

Yeah. You’ve heard?

Connect D- to # . That way, the main
cannon will fire without a computer.

I’m trusting you, man…

Now listen. Avoid using the m*ssile
if you can help it. It’s expensive.

Roger.

to target.

It’s almost time to
cut off computer controls.

Now, the only chance…

Once is enough.

Anyway, you can prove
that the satellite itself…

…and not a hacker,
is the bounty, right?

Ed can do that.

Anyway, please, listen to my favor.

Then I’ll give you all the bounty, too.

Oh, you’re a surprisingly good kid!

That’s it?

Someone…

How was it?

Did you get it?

No, I missed!

The satellite in front
of it shielded the blast!

Then you have to sh**t
down all the satellites!

All of them!?

If you don’t, they’ll sh**t us down!

ECM, eh?

Cheap ones are no good after all…

This is getting pointless.

Approach to within meters of MPU!

That way, the other
satellites can’t att*ck!

However…

Until then, Faye will act as a decoy.

Me!?

Yeah, thanks!

Come on, hurry up!

All right, it’s all yours!

MPU!

MPU? MPU!?

Oh, Ed!

Ed, we meet again.

They have a bounty on you, MPU.

Bounty?

Yup, but if we copy you and let
them catch that, you’ll be all right.

All right?

And you must be lonely
there alone, MPU.

If you come over here,
there are lots of friends.

Friends?

Here. It’s not scary.

And so, the strange end to this case.

The captured criminal was
the A.I. program for…

…a spy satellite that was launched
before the Earth was ruined.

According to government sources
from back then, it supposedly would…

…continue activity on its own
even without commands from Earth.

Well, it was the perfect excuse for
the cops to go on a hacker hunt.

But anyway, why did it start doodling on
the Earth with a laser all of a sudden?

I’m sure…

…that was because it got lonely.

Yoohoo! Bebop!

Hey, over here! Hurry!

Promise, promise!

Well, let’s get going now!

But the kid is saying
something about a promise…

Promises are made to be broken.

Anyway, let’s get going! Liftoff!

Not coming, not coming.

What is this? What’s going on!?

What did you promise?

It’s a promise…
to be a member of the Bebop.

Amigo! All you bounty hunters!

It’s finally time for Big sh*t!

Now, today’s hot news.

You’ve heard about the doodling
satellite that got caught, right?

Of course! It had a big bounty on it!

Just a few moments ago, the Earth
police made an official report.

What was it?

“This bounty is only for when humans
or other life forms are the targets.”

“It is difficult to determine whether or
not a computer program is a life form.”

“To begin with, from the viewpoint
of biological logistics…”

What’s that? I don’t understand well.

In other words, they can’t
pay up on nonliving things!

Oh, my

To those who caught it,
I feel sorry for you!

Hey, Jet, did you know that there
are three things that I hate?

Whatever…

Rugrats…

…beasts…

…and tomboys.

Don’t give me that!

Why do we have all three
neatly gathered here!?

Ed loves Piyokos!

And once again we
didn’t get any bounty…

Hey, wait, you’re a girl?

Really, nothing good comes outta Earth!

COMING EPISODE

No regrets about the
woman who ran away…

…but a small thorn
still pricks the heart.

Letting one flow along
with time itself…

…living all alone from
that day to this.

But to the sounds of
waves that come and go…

…the migrating birds
find their hearts drawn.

Next episode: “Ganymede Elegy.”

Jet Black will sing it up full of soul.

GANYMEDE ELEGY
Jet Black will sing it up full of soul.

GANYMEDE ELEGY