01x22 - Cowboy Funk

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Cowboy Bebop". Aired: April 3, 1998 – April 24, 1999.*
Watch/Buy Amazon  Merchandise

Japanese anime series takes place in 2071 and follows a group of bounty hunters who hunt criminals on their ship, the Bebop.
Post Reply

01x22 - Cowboy Funk

Post by bunniefuu »

You forgot something.

A-As you can see,
I’m just some old man.

Unfortunately, I don’t have
any children, either…

I never said it was yours.

Oh, was it a customer’s?
I will hold it, then…

How about it?

Wanna go somewhere?

It’s a little to early to go to bed…

I’m an early riser… I sleep early.

If you want a prim and proper life,
I have just the place for you.

A hotel where you get three meals
and a bodyguard, all for free.

I’m sure that’s impossible
without a reservation.

I’m talking about
Hotel prison, Teddy Bomber.

I’d rather not, Spike Spiegel.

Oh, you know me?

It’s a popular story among criminals…

…that we never want to be
caught by you, or by Andy.

Andy?

I will fulfill my objective!

It won’t blow up.

I took out the ignition pin.

million woolongs,
graciously accepted.

That’s not the only bear.

You’ll die, too.

I love them to death.

Why do you want to
blow stuff up so much?

Ya wanna know?
I am giving a warning.

I am ringing a bell of warning!

All right, be mindful of what I say!

Andy!

Andy?

Call me Wyatt Earp.

You! Teddy Bomber, serial bomber!

Me?!

The fact that you’d plant
a b*mb here today was easy…

…for me to figure out after
calculating your criminal cycles.

You don’t think that’s him?

He’s a security guard!

Just look at his face!

In this day and age,
a face means nothing.

Then what is the basis of your theory?!

That is…

…my gut instinct. Yes, inspiration!

Hey, wait!

Wait!

Oh sh*t!

That’s why I said Teddy Bomber
was that guy, you idiot!

Dangerous!

That was a close one.

Giddyup!

COWBOY FUNK

A horse?

Yeah, a horse.

A horse, huh?

I thought something was
fishy when you said you…

…would nab that guy as
part of your foraging trip.

What do you mean by that?

You used up the food money for
all four of us, didn’t you?

Oh, come on…

What did you use it on?

If you think I’m lying,
explain this on my back!

All right, I hear ya.

—The horse I can believe.
—You can?

But, you have to be more creative
than a cowboy in a cowboy outfit.

Is that the problem?

Now if he was dressed like a samurai…

…that would be more plausible.

Here he is… little Andy!

Little Andy is a guy in the YMCA…

A Christian?

Nope. Young Men’s Cowboy Association!

Oh? Such a thing exists?

But, he got kicked out
soon after joining.

The reason?

Because he caused others trouble!

Of course!

Andy von de Oniyate…
the noble son of Oniyate Ranch.

Hey, he’s pretty cute.

cases of property damage. cases
of destruction of public property.

Many, many people injured.

A good match for someone we know.

I told you he existed!

All right, I hear ya.

Any reactions?

None yet.

However…

We can’t let it explode
with all these people around.

His only target is the building.

He’s not one for m*rder.

You think we can trust him?

Guys like him are often concerned
with their sense of style.

Well, this is the perfect
party to hide yourself…

Did you know that a serial
bomber is gonna come here?

To tell the truth, I didn’t know.

Well, he’s coming.

Hey!

The world is about love and peace!

Yo.

H-How did you know it was me?

This lead the way to its papa.

I think I woulda known in either case.

You guys just don’t quit, do you?

Speak for yourself.

Why do you want to blow
things up so much?

Ya wanna know?

I am giving out a warning.

Listen, in this world,
the root of all evil…

A horse…

A cowboy…

Hey, you! Teddy Bomber!

M-Me?!

See, I told you.

Or is it you over there?

Do you have no memory?

We met just yesterday!

I have no recollection.

You!

Um, sir, your horse
is an inconvenience…

It does prove rather troublesome
for our other customers…

Oh! My beloved steed Onyx
is no ordinary horse!

At times, she sets my troubled mind at
ease; at others she is my chess partner.

Like horses play chess!

It doesn’t matter either way…

I detest being ignored!!

What happened to his sense of style?!

Calm down!
I’m telling you to calm down!

Love and peace, man!

Such a lovely horse.

Do you like her?

Would you like to be my escort?

Now, get behind me…

You little!

In my life, I’ve never seen such a…

…tasteless room.

Now, I present you with my
special Son of a g*n Stew.

I’m sure you’ll find
it extremely delicious.

Um… So, why are you a bounty hunter?

If you’re so rich, uh, I mean if you
have so much comfort in your life…

Why… Let’s see…

Because… it suits me.

That feeling a cowboy gets
when he corners a bull.

Oh… but you don’t have to go after
such a dangerous bounty, do you?

I know why nobody wants
to go after Teddy Bomber.

Nobody wants to get a
piece of the expl*si*n!

You think we can worry about that?

Yes! I don’t worry about
things like that!

Once I set my mind on something,
I can see nothing else!

I think I’ve seen this
personality somewhere before…

Oh, nothing…

Now!

Here’s lookin’ at…

…my reflection, kid.

Cheers…

Hi, I got a souvenir.

Yippie! A souvenir! A souvenir!

I ain’t gonna eat that!

Guess this is for dinner…

I will not eat that!

Your stomach will suffer.

But, what about him
makes you so hotheaded?

They’re too similar.

You know how similar
people hate each other.

What part of me is similar
to that sh*t-headed idiot?!

The part that makes
you damn troublesome.

Oh, Big sh*t has already started.

Well, the last thing we have to tell
you is info about TB, Teddy Bomber.

Can you believe it? We got a message
from him, just for this show!

What? Is that for real?

Um, let’s see…

Warning. “This is for those
that have made fun of me.”

“My next job is your last chance.”

“This time, I’ll blow you up
as well, like fireworks.”

My, my, he doesn’t sound calm.

“That is, if you know
where I will set up next.”

“Heh, heh, heh.”

“And lastly, I will tell
you my true intent…”

Whoops! Looks like time is up for us.
That’s all for today,

I’m sorry I couldn’t
read all of it, TB.

Well, until next time…

Good luck!

The next one’s in City Hall…

You figured it out already?

TB is blowing up tall buildings
starting with the tallest one…

The reason was that simple?

What are you gonna do?
I’m getting outta this one!

I’m gonna pass, too.

Spike, what are you going to do?

Like you have to ask?

Late!

Dammit! If they think they can get away
with this, they are sorely mistaken…

You alone?

How dare you take so
much time to get here!

Wait!

Wrong guy…

I have never intended
humans as targets!

But, you guys are different!

Guys like you deserve…

He’s here…

You! It was you!

So you finally remember me.

—You always…
—You always butt in and get in my way!

You’re the one that’s in the way!

Now that I have both of
you here, I will tell you.

The reason why I continue to
blow buildings up. That is because…

Today, we are going to settle
the score once and for all.

What?! That’s my line!

Listen to what I have to say!!

Shut up!

And you are? Who are you?!

C-Can’t you guys put some
effort into your work?!

We have to catch him first!

Wait!

You guys take me too lightly,

That elevator’s doors
will never open again.

And once it starts moving,
that’s the end. It will never stop.

At the top floor, my cute
little bears will greet you.

So, the moment that the elevator
reaches the top floor…

Boom!

Well, live what little you have
of your life left without regret!

Farewell, and good luck.

Rest assured.

I understand…
I know how he does things.

Don’t worry. I know how he does…

This afternoon, I reverted
the secret emergency…

…code that had been changed. Yeah!

I reverted it this afternoon!

Change after change…

…means it’s back to
where it started!!

Stop, you idiot!

What do we do, what do we do?!
Oh, no!!

Wah, stop, sh*t, it’s too tight!

You are in the way!

What?! Get outta the way, dammit!!

Farewell…

Come to think of it,
they were brave young men…

They’re climbing…
those two monkeys…

They like high places.

So they are similar…

Let’s just go back…

Then I’ll go turn him in.

You don’t even deserve
to be called a cowboy.

I will never forgive you.

Wow!

I lose…

That was some punch!

You are a true cowboy.

As of today, I will
no longer be a cowboy.

This really is a hats-off!

So… what are ya gonna do now?

I will no doubt find
a new way of life…

See you, Space Cowboy!

Well, it was only a rich boy’s hobby.

His level… no… rank…
was really no match for me.

Hey, are ya listening?

Yeah, yeah.

So, he just wasn’t any enemy of mine.

Of course, I never had
him in my line of sight.

—Hey, are ya listening?
—Yeah, yeah.

But anyway…

Why did you want to blow
stuff up so much?

I wanted to give a warning…

…against all the unnecessary waste
created by capitalism lacking philosophy.

Planets that needlessly get colonized.

Media that needlessly get circulated.

And buildings that are needlessly
tall to symbolize all of this!

And by destroying them,
I wanted to raise…

…the question of how
a true pioneer should be.

Wait, wait, wait!

Andy!

Call me… Musashi!

Go, Jiroumaru!

But…

It was all a waste, wasn’t it?

Aishiteta to nageku niwa…
Too much time has passed by…

…amarinimo toki wa sugite shimatta
…to lament that we were deeply in love.

Mada kokoro no hokorobi wo…
The wind keeps blowing, while my heart…

…iyasenu mama kaze ga fuiteru
…cannot heal all the tears in it.

Kawaita hitomi de dareka naite kure
Someone, cry for me with parched eyes.

The real folk blues.

Honto no kanashimi ga shiritai dake
I only want to know what true sadness is.

Doro no kawa ni tsukatta…
Sitting in muddy water…

…jinsei mo waruku wa nai…
…isn’t such a bad life…

…ichido kiri de owaru nara…
…if it ends after the first time…

COMING EPISODE

So, did you pay close attention
to me and my wonderful role?

Hey, wait a minute…

Now, the next episode,
the next story…

Why are you doing the preview?

Once again, it’s time for me, Andy,
to have an active role in the story!

Your turn on the stage is already over!

Now that I’m a space samurai, watch me
completely crush cowboys left and right!

You’re not appearing
in the show anymore!

Next episode of Cowboy Bebop:
“Andy Strikes Back”!

The title is nothing like that!

Please look forward to it!

BRAIN SCRATCH
Please look forward to it!
Post Reply