01x04 - The Modern Ninja

[bunniefuu]

Why are we forced to work?!

Why must we pay money in order to eat?!

Can't we all just share?

The rich get fat

while the poor die!

Where is the true freedom in this world?!

We are all slaves to our work!

And is work fun?

No! How could it be?!

We do not want to work, period!

That's why I, Hammerhead, will change our society

into one where only those who want to work will work,

while the rest are supported!

We will create a utopia!

The Paradisers led by me, Hammerhead, will make all this a reality!

Boss, no one's listening.

What?!

Bah! These civilians are idiots!

Let's go!

Zeniru's the richest man in town.

We'll wreck his posh penthouse and show them we're serious!

High-rise apartments are symbols of inequality!

- Yes, sir! - Yes, sir!

This whole building is Zeniru's home.

There's no way he made so much money legally.

Unforgivable! Bring it down!

Yes, sir!

Target destroyed!

Hm, these experimental battle suits sure pack a wallop.

It was definitely worth risking our lives to steal them.

Wait, that was the wrong building.

My bad, Boss.

Zeniru's house is a little further up.

Everyone makes mistakes!

The important thing is to learn from them. Am I right?

Yes, you're right!

All right, then onward to Zeniru's!

Thanks, bicycle guy!

Don't come asking to play rock, scissors, paper with a booger on your finger!

A dream?

The t*rror1st group responsible for the riots

call themselves the Paradisers.

They have destroyed a high-rise building in City F.

The situation seems to be spiraling out of control.

We have just learned the identity of their leader.

B-CLASS CRIMINAL - HAMMERHEAD Hammerhead is a B-class criminal

B-CLASS CRIMINAL - HAMMERHEAD who has been involved in several

B-CLASS CRIMINAL - HAMMERHEAD violent incidents in the past.

He is a man of large stature,

standing .m tall and weighing kg.

According to one report,

he once fought men in a street brawl

and sent them all to the hospital.

The Paradisers sent the following message to this TV station.

"We will continue to riot until food, clothing and shelter

"are provided free of charge to those who do not work,"

- Sounds pretty boring. - amongst other unintelligible demands.

Like Hammerhead, the group is made up of unemployed young men

- No need for me to get involved. - with no motivation to work.

Also, the group members all have shaven heads,

making them quite intimidating.

Those who encounter any shaven-headed men on the street

are advised to leave the area immediately.

What?

But that's--

They stole

my look!

I spend all this time trying to be a hero,

but if they keep acting up I'll be treated

like a villain!

I'm gonna smash them!

Run!

It's them!

The Paradisers are coming.

They aren't...

backing down!

This is too dangerous!

Stop right there, you pack of thugs!

The bicyclist for justice, Mumen Rider, is here!

Mumen Rider has come to save us!

There's nothing to fear if he's here!

A hero? What a joke!

Here I go!

Somebody call an ambulance!

Mr. Zeniru, you must flee!

H-Hm. But running away from t*rrorists

would hurt my reputation.

There's no need to leave.

You're a lucky man,

having this occur while I'm still under contract.

But you're a bodyguard--

Oh, Sonic!

Can I leave this to you?

The men coming are--

Of course.

It's their lives you should worry about.

But please do think of a way to dispose of the pile of dead bodies.

The Paradisers...

A bunch of upstarts equipped with some new type of battle suit.

And B-class criminal Hammerhead.

He might have some backbone.

THE MODERN NINJA

Boss, you can see Zeniru's building across the woods.

People call it the Golden Turd.

All right, let's go!

Something's here.

I've been waiting for you, Hammerhead.

Zeniru sent me.

Let me start out by saying

no opponent of mine has ever escaped alive.

I plan on keeping it that way.

When it comes to my job, I'm a perfectionist.

But if you surrender right now,

I'll let you live.

So, what will it be?

What is this?

What's going on?

Why is every--

Nooo!

Bastard!

What's this now? Trying to intimidate me?

You can't see me, can you?

There you are!

It's a t*rror1st!

No, I'm not!

So he decided to fight instead of run.

Oops, there goes my bad habit again.

You're just a little dog bought by Zeniru's money.

You think someone like me, who fights for a noble cause,

can lose to a dog?!

Yes, I see what he's up to.

Just as I thought-- he's a complete fool.

Couldn't he have at least

tried to arrange the rocks in a less obvious way?

There are plenty more rocks where those came from!

If you don't stop me, they'll keep coming.

So you think you'll be able to deal with my speed

if you know which direction I'm coming from?

How pathetic. But I'll play along.

In fact,

I'll take you...

straight on!

He's too fast. I can't see him.

But it doesn't matter if I can't.

Because of this!

Gotcha!

Think about how stupid you were to face off against me

on your way down to Hell!

It's over.

Unfortunately, I couldn't go easy on them.

Yes, Hammerhead's body is here too.

I'll head back now--

The body disappeared?

That was close!

Good thing he hit my head.

My skull always was several times thicker than normal.

Dammit. I don't know who that bastard was,

but one day I'm gonna k*ll--

Huh?

Now what?

Hm?

Oh, there you are.

As with the mosquito monster,

I once again underestimated my opponent's power.

I let my guard down and Kabuto took advantage of that.

If Master Saitama had not been there,

I would certainly have been destroyed.

I see.

Well, I'm glad you're okay--

Doctor...

Master Saitama saved my life twice.

You, Doctor Kuseno, restored my life to me.

Later this same life was saved by Master Saitama,

who now has saved it again.

Yes, I get the picture, Genos.

What you're trying to tell me is

how amazing this Saitama fellow is, right?

Yes.

Genos, they're not ready just yet,

but I am developing a new series of augmentations.

When I replace your existing parts with these new ones,

you may be able to surpass this Saitama.

I imagine he must possess an enormous amount of strength

for you go on about him so.

Yes.

What's your deal?

You here to sign up with the Paradisers?

No, no.

I'm just a guy who's a hero for fun.

For personal reasons, I'm here to smash your heads in.

So, where are your followers?

Then, die!!

I better get out of here quick.

Huh?!

I thought I punched him?

What a letdown.

I was all excited about these battle suits.

But the design is lame,

and all they do is give you superhuman strength.

You have no idea how hard it was

to get hold of these things!

How could you know their value?!

I've been looking for someone to test the full power of this suit on!

Spin att*ck!

I used to use that move all the time when I was a kid...

Huh?

No way...

Hammerhead, huh? He's a lot like me.

What the hell are you?!

W-Wait. I just wanted to get out of working...

Don't be bad anymore, okay?

Huh? So you're not going to k*ll me?

- Get outta here. - Okay!

Guess I'll go home.

Where did Hammerhead go?

There's no one left but you.

Hammerhead went that way. Buck naked.

What's this?

Hey, you got it wrong.

I got what wrong?

I'm not one of the Paradisers.

You're lying.

No, no, no. Don't be dumb--look at me!

I don't need to.

With that bald head, there's no denying it.

No.

Look! It's me. Me!

You know, the guy who's a hero for fun--

Never heard of you.

Oh, I see...

Either way, it doesn't matter.

You read my att*cks. Twice. That's the real problem.

Born in a ninja village,

I've been perfecting my techniques since childhood.

Yet you saw right through them. This I cannot allow.

What's he talking about?

My pride won't have it.

I don't care who you are, I can't let you simply walk away.

Oh, come on.

You just want to try out your moves on me.

I can tell by that innocent smile of yours.

What do you think of this speed that beats sound?

Of these shock waves?

Can you even see me?

How can you possibly keep up with me?

Can I go home?

Bastard!

Wind Blade Kick!

Checkmate.

Sorry!

That wasn't on purpose.

I meant to stop before hitting you,

but your momentum carried my fist into your...

WE ARE EXPERIENCING TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES. PLEASE STAND BY.

I've worked every job from assassin to bodyguard.

No ninja is more deadly.

I am Speed-o'-Sound Sonic!

But I'm putting my work on hold.

Now that I've found such a formidable opponent,

I'm dedicating myself to training until we settle this.

Let me know your name.

It's Saitama.

Saitama!

Next time we meet, it'll be your demise!

Okay.

I, Speed-o'-Sound Sonic, the ultimate ninja,

will bring you down without fail!

Train hard!

Speed-o'-Sound Sonic?

Who is that?

And who would possess such a redundant name?

Dunno.

He suddenly appeared,

declared we were rivals, and took off.

If he is a nuisance, I will get rid of him.

Well, you're hardly different.

Actually, why are you here again?

Go home. It's not like we're related.

Master, I must become stronger--

Shut up!

I'm now aware of a serious problem and am reeling from shock.

So I beg you, go home for today.

A serious problem?

What could cause a problem for someone as great as you?

Please share with me.

No one knows who I am.

It's been three years since I first became a hero.

I've defeated many monsters and evil organizations during that time.

I've never heard of any other heroes doing as much as me.

Everyone in the world should know me by now!

Isn't it weird that I don't have any fans or anything?!

You know what he said to me today?

"Never heard of you."

Plus, everyone in town took me for a t*rror1st.

They've all forgotten how I b*at those monsters for them!

He is right.

The news report did not mention

Master Saitama or Speed-o'-Sound Sonic.

Instead, the credit for defeating the Paradisers

went to a hero called Mumen Rider.

Wait...

Master!

Are you listed with the Hero Registry?

HERO ASSOCIATION OFFICIAL HOMEPAGE

"Take a test at any local branch of the Hero Association.

"If you score better than the cut-off,

"you will be registered in the Hero Registry and

"will be allowed to officially call yourself a 'hero.'

"Once you are recognized by the Association,

"you are deemed a pro and will get paid

"from donations collected by the Association.

"All heroes in the public eye

"are registered, professional heroes.

"You may be doing plenty of hero work,

"but self-proclaimed heroes

"are really just weir...does..."

"...weirdoes spouting nonsense viewed with suspicion."

I had no idea.

Genos, are you registered?

No. I feel no need to.

Let's register! Register with me and I'll make you my disciple.

Let's go.

P-Please... F-Forgive me...

Pleading for his life after stealing battle suits from the organization?

He truly understood nothing.

Of course, we did let the theft take place

in order to collect data from the suits in the field.

And the body?

Leave it.

Thanks for giving me my thick skull...

Mommy.

I promise I'll get a job!

APPLICATION FOR HERO TEST Our guest today is Mr. Majimeda,

APPLICATION FOR HERO TEST an expert on the labor issues confronting young people today.

Thank you for having me.

As we saw with the Paradiser incident recently,

there's an increase in young people who lack all motivation to work.

can you comment on this phenomenon?

-I'm not so different... -Even in the case of the Paradisers,

I think they've been influenced by irresponsible lyrics

in popular songs like "Don't Give Up on Your Dreams"

and "Make Your Dreams Come True."

- ...from those unemployed guys. - People who believe such hogwash

end up making excuses for themselves and become discouraged.

One wrong step and I could've been one of them.

Ready to go, Master?

Y-Yeah.

HERO TEST LOCATION #

NEXT EPISODE: THE ULTIMATE MENTOR Err... I'm the recently reformed Hammerhead.

NEXT EPISODE: THE ULTIMATE MENTOR Before I introduce next week's episode,

NEXT EPISODE: THE ULTIMATE MENTOR I'd like to do a little PR for myself.

Oh? You won't allow that?

Next time on One-Punch Man: Episode , "The Ultimate Mentor."

Yeah, if I'd had a mentor like him, maybe my life would've been different.