04x02 - The Homeliest Little Horse

[bunniefuu]

Hi. Morning.

Come on, gizmo.
We're gonna be late.

♪ I don't know... ♪
- ♪ You just got me actin' so crazy ♪

♪ This could be love ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, baby ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, baby... ♪

♪ Whatever you want,
I'm so gone, I can't think ♪

♪ Whatever you want ♪

♪ And I think
it might be love ♪

- ♪ This could be love ♪
- ♪ This could be love ♪

- ♪ Ooh, ooh, baby ♪
- ♪ Oh, baby, baby ♪

♪ Got me acting up ♪

♪ I'm digging on you ♪

- ♪ I'm digging on you ♪
- ♪ I don't know what to do ♪

♪ No, no, no, no, no
no, no, no ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, baby,
ooh, baby, baby ♪

♪ Got me acting up,
don't know what to do ♪

♪ You got me so in love ♪

♪ 'Cause I'm digging on you ♪

♪ I'm so in love ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, baby, ooh, ooh, baby ♪
- ♪ Hey ♪

♪ Hey, baby ♪
- ♪ Don't know what to do wit you, baby ♪

♪ You got me going crazy ♪

♪ You just got me acting so crazy ♪
- ♪ Uh-huh, oh... ♪

Oh, my god.

"Kokomo, in"
by Japanese breakfast begins plays...

♪ If I could throw my arms ♪

♪ Around you for just... ♪

- Hello.
- Earn. Hey, man.

Look, you remember
my gamer tag log in?

How the hell would I know that?
Just reset it.

Yeah, what the hell you think
I've been trying to do, man?

It just keeps saying go
into my old email or something.

Which email?

Aim?

As in aol?

Oh, that's what that is.
Yeah, n*gga, that one.

Mm. I-I don't know, dude.

What's the password hint?

It say it's my favorite movie.

Favorite movie...

Scarface?

Scarface, right?
Like, that's got to be it, man.

- Hold on. Let me try that.
- No.

Man, it was in middle school.
Try mulan.

n*gga. Mulan.

Oh, sh*t.
I think that worked.

Yeah.

Hey, what you on for today, man?

Therapy.

Say that again. You on...
W-What you doing?

Therapy.

See how rich I'm making you?

Bye, Alfred.
I'll talk to you later.

No, hold on. So, hold on,
hold on. Wait. Oh, so,

you rich rich?
Hey, Darius.

Hey, man, he rich off my 15%.

This fool giving money away.

- All right. Bye.
- For therapy, n*gga.

And make sure
to call that realtor. Bye.

Aight, aight.

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♪ Keed, talk to 'em ♪

- ♪ Warrior, warrior ♪
- ♪ Warrior ♪

- ♪ Warrior ♪
- ♪ warrior, warrior ♪

- ♪ Ah ♪
- ♪ warrior. ♪

Fine.

Uh, probation ended.

Uh, my Alma mater asked me
to speak,

so...

Hold on.

Sorry.

Um...

Where-where was I? I don't...

Probation, Princeton.

Right.

Um, really is, um,
getting a sense of, uh...

- Sorry. Sorry.
- Hmm.

Earn, I know it can be hard
to disconnect,

but we can't have
productive sessions

with your cellphone on, earn.

It's important. I can't pay
for this if I don't do this.

You seem... Frustrated.

I am. I'm having heart troubles,
and my doctor is telling me

I need to get my head checked.

That sounds serious.

I hope I can help, but to do so,
we can't have distractions.

So, what did your doctor say?

I have a tightness in my chest

and a pain, numbness
going down my left arm.

They say I'm healthy.
They think I'm lying.

Do you have reason to think
they don't believe you?

If they did it to Kim Porter,
they'll do it to me.

I had to get a second opinion.
They got me

walking around like a lit a: Battle angel all weekend.

Whoa! EKG machine.

Yeah.

- What's their guess?
- Depression,

panic att*cks, anxiety.

- You know, a smattering.
- Hmm.

Well, I mean, panic and anxiety
can manifest in many forms.

You should listen to your body.
It's smarter than you think.

Yeah, but anxiety about what?

You know, my life is good.
It's not a flex,

like, work is really good.

I'm making more money
than I've ever made.

You know, the agency
keeps giving me more clients.

- I mean, it's great.
- Good.

How are things at home?

Good. Fine.

Uh, I'm redecorating the condo,
so...

Which honestly
doesn't make much sense

if I'm moving out of state.

Wow.
That's a really big decision.

What... What changed?

Uh... I got a job offer in I.A.

- Creative consulting.
- Mm.

Yeah, it's, um...

It's a big deal, I guess. I...

I haven't told Van yet.

Are you worried
about the distance

between you and lot tie

if you take this job
and Van doesn't want to go?

Yeah. Yeah.

If I'm being honest,

I think lot tie needs me more
now than ever, you know?

Um...

Can I... Can I lay down?

Please, yeah. Yeah.

Just don't fall asleep on me.

Yeah.

Ah, thank you.

$400?

To change a flight?
Hey, what the hell?

Well, what about
for medical emergencies?

Uh-huh.

10:00 with Gordon?
All right, go on and sign in.

Yeah.

A doctor's email?

Will y'all take masthead
stationary instead?

Uh-huh.

Sit.

Okay.

Sit down.

Yeah.

Hey.

Hey! Come on.

Gordon. Mm.

Ah, Lisa. Yeah, come,
come in, come in.

The name is Gordon Rosenbaum,

literary agent
to the eastern seaboard.

Yeah. Please, please. So, uh,

tell me, uh, you, uh...
You signed to anyone yet?

Like a-a book agent? I wish.

Um, I could use your advice
on that.

Uh, you are the first person
who has reached out to...

Oh, no, no.
First rule of negotiations...

Never admit
that you're not that wanted.

I'll keep this brief.
Uh, I found a sample

of your kids' book online,

and I'd love
to find you a publisher.

Uh, how long you been writing?

Oh, uh...

My whole life.

- Mr. Rosenbaum.
- Mm?

Your 10:30, man.

Oh. Uh, thank you. Thank you.

Uh, so, uh,
do you have any drawings

to go along with your book?

Uh, no, sir, not yet.
Is that a problem?

Ah, lis, kids need things
to look at, all right?

I-I got you covered. I-I know
a few, uh, illustrators

at scad you can commission,
but time is of the essence.

Deadline is end of week.

Yeah, I don't think
that I could aff...

- Deadline?
- Well, yeah. Yeah, it's a...

It's a seller's market.
End of the quarter.

Publishers are offloading
their budget.

- Now, Tracy has a...
- Huh?

I didn't call you.

Tracy has arranged
for a sort of story time reading

at the local library already.

It's, uh...
They're mostly inner-city kids.

I've arranged for a publishing
legend to scout you there.

Now you can't miss her.
Just look for the hat.

Uh, wait. Um, do you think
that I could get signed?

Signed? Kid,
that story of yours could be

the biggest payday
since the berenstein bears.

- Or berenstain. Or... you get it.
- No, I get it.

Yeah. Oh, uh, uh, don't screw
this up for the rest of us.

All right?
And congratulations. I accept.

- Uh, accept what?
- To be your book agent.

Here's my card.
Call me if you need anything.

Oh.

And there's a hair place
at the mall... Talia's.

They can do something
about those grays.

I need you smoking hot
for Raul, our photo guy.

Let's talk about who you trust.

I trust people to be themselves.

Based on their incentives
and what they've rationalized.

So... No one.

Yeah. Maybe Darius.

What's in the box?

Oh, uh, new keyboard.

I get everything delivered here.

You know, it's, uh, safer.

Oh. You play?

Yeah, I've been known to get a
little busy on the keys. Mm-hmm.

Little bit.

Could you play me something?

- Maybe later.
- Ah.

So, uh, tell me about,
uh, Princeton.

Did you accept their invitation
to speak?

No. No.

I told them to give me an
honorary degree or kiss my ass.

Mm. And what'd they say?

They said "yes"...
To the degree, not my ass.

That's a hell of a negotiation.

Yeah.

Yeah, not-not really.

I mean,
it's-it's a pretend degree.

I can't start
a medical practice with it.

In the end,
I'm making more money

than if I had stayed, so...

You proud of that?

Yeah. f*ck that school.

Sounds like you resent them.

They're only after me now
because of two reasons.

One, because being black
is valuable,

and two, donations.

Mm, right.

You know,
you've-you've alluded to it,

but what exactly happened
to you at Princeton?

Me and this girl named Sasha...

We were new ras
in the same building, right?

And we got close really fast,

and I felt like I could
be honest with her, right?

You know, we're new friends,
but good friends.

Anyway,
I get this job interview,

and I'm really excited
about it, you know.

I call my parents,
I get a little money from them,

and I scrounge up
a little money.

I buy a suit, 'cause I need
to look presentable.

I go buy the suit,
then I go to the computer lab.

What did you get?
What kind of suit?

Navy blue slacks
and blazer with leather loafers.

Okay, so you were stylin'.

I was stylin'.
It was, like, super nice.

I looked good, right?

So, I'm at the computer lab,
and my crush comes in.

And she asked me
if I want to go

to this party
in Philly with her.

She wants me to go,
and I'm like, "cool."

Sasha is a couple
of stalls down.

She hears this
and offers to take my suit,

stash it in her room, and I can
just go straight from there.

I'm like, "cool. Thank you."
you know?

I go to the party,

I come back,
I text her to get the suit.

No response.

I text her again. No response.

I text her a third time.
Same thing.

Did something happen?

I don't think so.
It was like she was ducking me.

So, it's hours
before the interview...

- Right.
- ...And I'm freaking out.

So I'm texting her again.

I'm like,
"hey, where's the suit?

I really need the suit."

And she just writes back...

"sorry. Not around."

Hmm.

So what did you do?

Man, I went downstairs,
I knocked on her door.

No one picked up.

You know, so I went in there
with my master key,

and I got my suit, and I left.

Big mistake.

She was, like, furious. Like...

She told the Dean,

and it became, like,
a real thing.

He's coming back, saying like,
"oh, this is a suspension."

And then it turns
into expulsion.

So I'm guessing
Sasha wasn't black.

No.

- Of course not.
- Yeah.

They started using
r*pist language for what I did.

r*pist language?

"Intruder," "personal as*ault,"
"att*ck on privacy."

like, I was scared.

You know, I apologized, but it
was like no one was listening.

It's like no one cared.

What do you think
their perception was?

That this big black gorilla came
into this white girl's room

and just destroyed sh*t.
I don't know.

Uh, you know, as an ra,

they make you feel like
you have some sort of agency.

But then you turn around,

and then, all of a sudden,
you're o.J.

It's, like,
why give me the master key

if you didn't trust me
to use it?

- How'd that make you feel?
- Angry.

Everybody on campus
is talking about me.

I'm, like,
one of 12 black kids.

You know, I already felt alone.

What else did you feel?

- Hurt, I guess.
- Why? Why?

Because we were supposed
to be friends.

We were supposed to be friends.

She never even asked why.

Why I did what I did.

- You trusted Sasha.
- Yeah.

And you were hurt
by someone you trusted.

Yeah.

Like the family member
who abused you.

Yeah.

Which made you feel powerless
again.

It's cool.

You should release this.

- No. I'm good. I'm good.
- Hey.

No, I'm-I'm good.

So what happened
between you two?

We never talked again.
You know, I had to leave.

I just promised...

I'd just prove everybody wrong.

Did you prove everyone wrong?

Yeah.

I love spite.

- It's a pure, powerful thing.
- Hmm.

It gave me courage.

You know, I can count on it.

I used it when I came back
to Atlanta, you know?

Spite can be...

Spite can be very powerful.

But it can also leave you...

Depressed and empty.

Goals stop becoming yours.

You start becoming a...

A book written
by somebody else.

Someone with no incentive
for your well-being.

So by not going back
to Princeton,

you may be proving something
to her and not yourself.

Yeah, maybe.

I'm sorry,
but what were you thinking?

I was thinking that I was going
to meet outkast and get married.

Which is completely reasonable.

But why are you smiling
so much lately?

Are you getting laid?

No.

It's better than that.

Whoa. Ah.

Spill it.

I quit my job.

Whoa. Wait.

Why?

An agent read my book online
and wants to sign me.

I just have
to do this reading thing.

I mean, he thinks it could be,
like, the next Harry Potter.

Wow. That's great.

What? What is it?

Nothing. Nuh... Nuh...

You've quit your job.

Yeah, I had to quit my job
because I have

to just really focus

on hiring an illustrator,
a PR firm.

I need a stylist.

I mean, if this thing takes off,

it could be huge,
like, franchised.

It is so lucrative.

Don't you think?

Yeah, sure, but it-it doesn't
really matter what I think.

Yes, it does.
You're my best friend.

♪ Ground to start from... ♪

God.

Look, Lisa, you have my support.

You have my support.

♪ You'll say the world... ♪

I just, um...

I can't loan you another $500
this... This month.

I've got a lot of bills,
and I...

Look, I'm just worried
about you.

Tell me you like my writing.

Lisa...

Sorry I'm late.

No. How you doing, earn?

Good.

Oh, another box.
You starting a band?

Not quite. It's a gift.

Go ahead and open it.

- You serious?
- I'm serious.

Man, I hate opening gifts
in public.

I mean, what if it sucks?

It's a floor pillow.

I mean, you spend so much time
laying on the floor, I figured,

you know, might as well be
comfortable, right?

That's really thoughtful.

Try it out.

Oh...

That's... Good.

That is comfy.

Now all I need is some music.

Oh, okay.

So it's a full-service thing
here?

- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah, maybe later.

Mm.

So, look,
we've had a few sessions

since your Princeton offer.

And, uh, you know,
I think it's important.

So did you decide?

Yeah, so I thought about
what you said, you know, a lot,

and, uh, I think you're right.

You know,
I was holding on to the pain

for no reason, you know?

They totally win

if I don't use my position
to help people in my experience.

Well, it's not a w*r to win,
exactly, but that's good.

That's good. So you're going?

Oh, no. Definitely not.

No, I tried. It was a disaster.

Why was it a disaster?

So, I email Princeton,

and I tell 'em, you know,
I'll do the panel or whatever.

And the-the idea was
I'll bring lot tie and Van,

and then afterwards,
I'd take lot tie to sesame place.

So we're going
to the airport, you know,

I'm looking for my driver's
license, I can't find it.

It's probably
in my pants somewhere.

So I just bring my passport.
No big deal, right?

Right.

We get to the airport, and we
start to check in, you know,

and the computer prints out
Van's ticket,

and her name's
all spelled wrong.

So I'm like,
"that's fine. It's okay.

We'll go in the priority Lane."

You know,
I got platinum status.

We get there, the lady asks
to see my passport.

And I'm like, "why?
Like, I'm already checked in."

But I give her the passport
anyway.

She looks at it,
hands it back to me

and tells me
it's too damaged to travel.

- On a domestic flight?
- On a domestic flight.

That's exactly what I said.

I mean, the pages were worn,
at best.

Damn. White woman?

I mean, do you even need to ask?

You know, so I'm like, "that's cool.

Whatever.
Let's get a second opinion."

So she calls over her coworker,
but she's asking her in a way

that's like, "I'm not gonna let
these people on anyway."

And the coworker kind of looks
at us and shrugs like,

"I don't want to get involved
in this bullshit.

I don't agree with her,
but what are you gonna do?"

So at this point, I'm like,

"let's try the, you know,
emotional angle."

I was like, "I got a child here.

"Here are the passes
for sesame place.

Please let us in."

This lady laughs
in my f*cking face.

- Wow.
- Yeah, I can't believe it.

I'm like,
"what am I gonna do, wild out?"

You know, I'm at the airport.

So I-I don't want
to get on the no fly list.

Did you ask
to speak to a manager?

- She was the manager.
- Oh, no.

At least, that's what she says.

You know, so she boots us
out of the line.

A couple of minutes later,

Van waves us over
to this black woman

who's working
at a different counter.

She checks us in, no problem.

She checks our bags, no problem,
and tells us

that that n*zi ticket lady
does this all the time

to black travelers,
and guess what?

She's not even a manager.

- You're kidding.
- I can't make this sh*t up.

So, this woman, this nice woman
walks us through security

so we can make it on time.

When we get to the gate,
home girl must've tattled,

because tsa is right there
waiting for us.

At this point, I'm like,
"f*ck this.

I don't want to go.
I don't care anymore."

Van starts crying. You know,

she's like,
"I'm not gonna go without you."

So, long story short,

we're still waiting
on our baggage.

I'm really sorry
you had to go through that.

- Yeah.
- Damn.

I mean, tell me, how do you...
How do you feel?

Honestly, the whole time...

I was thinking
about what you said on spite.

Going back to Princeton...
That wasn't important to me.

Facing my past...
That really was, you know?

I was mad about the time
that got wasted.

You know, I-I wanted to spend
that time with Van and lot tie.

You know, I wanted to talk
to Van about the move.

I really wanted
to connect with them.

See, it sounds like you're
recognizing the big picture.

Yeah, the anxiousness
and anger...

You're not gonna achieve
your goals with those, you know?

That's really good, earn.

Yeah, um...

You know, it's good
to hear you say that, 'cause...

I've been thinking a lot,
and I-I kind of want

to take some time out
from therapy.

Just a little, you know,
'cause you've given me

s-so many good tools,
I-I kind of want

to deal with my issues
on my own, you know?

Sure. Yeah, I mean, I'd love

to keep working with you,
but I-I understand.

And, like, hey, if-if you need
anything, you know I'm here.

Thanks.

You know, I'm impressed,
'cause most people,

they end this
over a phone call or email or...

Oh, I'm not that cold-blooded.

Um, you can have this back,
man.

Oh, no, no, no, no. Keep it.

- Are you sure?
- I'm positive.

It's too small for me.

Don't be sh1tting
on my height, man.

Take care, earn.

All right.

No dogs.

Oh, this is my...
This is my service dog.

No, it's not. You're gonna have
to leash that outside.

Well...
...I have a note

for that... Right here.

It's from my doctor.

You're here for that story time?

Yes, I am.

How'd you guess?

Your hair. Talia's?

You still can't bring that dog
in here.

That's absurd.

I work at the airport.

This note is legally
faa approved.

Okay. Well, story time begins
in 15 minutes.

Unless, of course, you and your
dog want to try the airport.

Come on, baby.

♪ Please be quiet ♪

♪ Please be quiet ♪

♪ let's calm down ♪

♪ Now it's time for reading ♪

♪ Now it's time
for reading ♪

♪ Shh, shh, shh. ♪

They're all yours.

This book is called

the homeliest little horse.

Story by Lisa mahn.

"There once was a horse
who lived on a farm.

"Completely alone,
no friends in the barn.

"All other horses kept her away.

"They called her mean names,
too ugly to say.

Sad and dismayed,
she tried to escape..."

I don't like this horse.

It's ugly. I like sitron.

Oh. Okay, well...

"...But always got lost
by the old farmer's lake."

This horse is stupid.

That's why no one likes it.

"But one fourth of July,

"a spark hit the ground,

setting the barn ablaze."

The horses farted.

- The horses farted.
- No.

The hor...

The horses are scared
because of the fire.

They all look like
they're farting.

All that smoke is them farting.

Okay, but they're not...

Farting.

You fart.

"All except..."

Hmm.

"All except
the homeliest horse,

"who then took command and said,

"'if we work together,
all will be well.'

and all of them kicked
in the shed."

I don't like this story.

- "It worked like a charm."
- it's lousy. I want to go.

- "The horses were saved."
- come on. Let's go.

"Alas..."

- Stupid.
- Um...

I don't like this.

No, just keep going.

Keep going.

Okay, um...

"It worked like a charm.
The horses were saved.

"Alas," um,

"the barn was never the same."

"She earned a medallion
for 'bravest of stallions'...

And was even invited to play."

"and when she came out,

"the horses did shout,

"'three cheers for the horse.

Hooray!'"

♪ thought I found
the answer to it... ♪

Here you go, man.

Thank you, Mr. Marks.

- No problem.
- Uh, did you get my heads hot?

Yes. If I do this again,
I promise

you will be the first person
I call.

- Yo, yo, yo.
- Hey, what's up?

You guys actually came.

- Hey.
- What's going on, baby?

- Good to see you. Let's get a drink, all right?
- Yes.

- Yeah.
- Drink. That's why we're here.

- Okay.
- Uh, one sec. Here you go.

I heard that you guys
needed new costumes.

I put a little extra
for you and your puppet.

Thank you for supporting
community theater.

- You're very welcome.
- What the hell is going on, man?

You got free booze,
arcade games.

You're giving out cash
like nino brown and sh*t.

It's a wrap party.

Remember that woman Lisa mahn?

The one that ruined
my-my family, uh, trip?

Oh, yeah, I remember her.

Yeah, well,
I hired all these actors

to ruin her life.

I-I think she's
in debt now, seriously.

Wow. Are you still
tripping off that?

Like, n*gga,
that was two months ago.

I know, man.
The planning's been crazy.

- What's up, man?
- Hey, what's up?

Oh, sh*t.

Hey, good job, man.

Ooh, ooh-ooh!

Heavy chevys, baby.

Yo, thanks for the cash, man.

Yo, you crazy as f*ck, boy!

Yeah, man.

Hey, you better watch your back.
You're next.

Nah, man. You're f*cking with me, man.

What you gonna do to me, man?
You know me.

Told you. Watch out
for your cousin. He's sick, man.

- Yeah.
- I'll holler at you, brother. All right.

How much, um,
did you spend on all this, man?

Enough, but it was worth it,
trust me.

So you did all of this
to hurt one lady?

- Uh-huh.
- Okay.

Hey, look, I'm-a go
to that def jam three machine

- 'cause this n*gga is trippin'.
- Yeah. Yeah.

Al.
It's funny.

Wow.

I can't tell if this is extreme,
extreme pettiness...

Or terrorism.

Great job.

It can be both.

Ah.

Yo, let me get a blue silk.

"Cold blooded"
by Rick James playing...

Mm, mm, mm.

Hmm.

Thanks.

I really need
to go back to therapy.

♪ Cold blooded ♪

♪ The way you walk ♪

♪ Sexy ♪

♪ The way you talk, baby ♪

♪ Sexy ♪

♪ Mama, you're too cold for me ♪

♪ Sexy ♪

♪ Freaky baby ♪

♪ Who are you? ♪

♪ You look like a movie star ♪

♪ Girl, what's your name
and number? ♪

♪ Is it true ♪

♪ That you think I'm hot? ♪

♪ Hot ♪

♪ If we try ♪

♪ To get to know each other ♪

♪ You might find ♪