09x03 - A Bowl of Ramen

[bunniefuu]

H: Here's your ramen!

I: Late on New Year's Eve,

I: that scruffy-looking man ordered not New Year's soba, but a bowl of ramen.

I: "I can't eat this much."

I: Saying that, the man took two extra cups, divided his ramen into three portions,

I: and shared them with my husband and me.

I: And after devouring his portion in an instant,

I: he left, walking down the wintry streets with his stomach rumbling.

I: The next year, and the year after that...

Sign: Hokuto Shinken

I: Every New Year's Eve, that man would visit.

I: He would always use what little money he had

I: to order a bowl of ramen and share it with us.

I: Each time, my husband would divide it into three portions,

I: load one of them up with pork topping, and serve it to the man.

I: Meanwhile, he would slurp on ramen that was nothing but soup.

H: Ikumatsu.

H: This is our restaurant's year-end tradition now.

H: Should anything happen to me, make sure you keep it going.

I: That would turn out to be the last bowl of ramen my husband ever made.

I: It would also mark the end of the little year-end tradition the three of us shared.

Gintama,OP Card: Gintama

OP Card: Slip Arc

Title: A Bowl of Ramen

Sign: Hokuto Shinken

Warning: Watch the Slip Arc in a bright roomand at a safe distance from your TV!

I: He didn't come last New Year's Eve, either.

Ramen banner: ,Ramen

I: Ever since my husband passed away, he hasn't shown up at all.

I: He was a strange one.

I: He clearly had no money to spare, but he'd share his ramen with us

I: and then leave, still hungry.

I: He must've been really lonely.

I: Maybe he was coming here for company, not ramen.

I: Who knows where he is and what he's doing now?

I: Meanwhile, here I am, upholding my husband's last wish

I: and waiting for him with a bowl loaded up with pork topping.

I: Here's your ramen—

Shin: Don't try to hog the pork!

Gin: Shut it! I'm the one who won big at pachinko!

Gin: You sit there and sip on the soup!

Kag: The egg! Let me just have the egg!

I: Jeez, you three.

I: Why not drink a soup of the dirt in that old man's nails while you're at it?

I: I hope he's doing just as well as you seem to be.

I: I can't help but be worried.

Kat: Ikumatsu-dono, I would say your concern is unnecessary.

Kat: If that poor, lonely man was coming here seeking company at the end of the year,

Kat: it's actually a good thing that he stopped showing up.

Kat: He must've settled down in life

Kat: and found someone he can eat traditional New Year's food with instead of ramen.

Kat: Or maybe the ramen here got worse once you took over—

I: Here's your soba!

Shin: Y-You know that's not right, Katsura-san!

Shin: Ikumatsu-san's ramen is the best in Edo! No, the best in the universe!

Shin: There's no doubt that man is just dying to have it one more time, too!

Shin: Right, Ikumatsu-san?

Kag: He's got some nerve to not show any gratitude after all that pork he ate.

Kag: If he's got money now, he should come back and share some ramen with us.

Shin: What do you have to do with anything?

I: This is a task my husband left to me after worrying about it until the end.

I: Taking over the restaurant was all well and good, but this lingers with me.

I: And I haven't returned that scarf, either.

I: But you're right.

I: He must be leading such a happy life that he forgot all about this dingy ramen shop.

I: I'll just assume that's what happened.

I: Either way, there's nothing I can do but stay here and keep making ramen.

Gin: Hey, Zura.

Gin: Unlike you, I'm a busy man.

Kat: I'm not Zura. I'm Katsura.

Gin: I'm in luck today.

Gin: The dice and the cards are all waiting for me.

Kat: What's that saying? A fool with a big mouth and his money are soon parted?

Kat: I said what I did earlier out of consideration for Ikumatsu-dono.

Kat: But Gintoki, what do you think happened to that man, honestly?

Gin: He had no home or family, and he was old to boot, right?

Gin: Probably d*ed on the streets, at best.

Kat: Probably.

Kat: But that's only if the man was truly homeless.

Kat: This scarf he forgot at the restaurant...

Kat: It's worn out from use, but it's a high-quality item.

Kat: It would also have stuck out like a sore thumb if a homeless man was wearing it.

Kat: We might be able to find him.

Kat: If he's still alive, that is.

Kat: But if you truly are in luck today,

Kat: I might be able to clear my tab at Hokuto Shinken.

Gin: Not happening. Anyway, what I want to know is...

Gin: Zura, did you get all the way to **** base with Ikumatsu?

Kat: O-Of all the disgusting accusations! Have some shame!

Gin: I mean, you're always on her side for some reason,

Gin: and I keep running into you every time I go there for ramen lately.

Gin: So you haven't sealed the deal yet, huh?

Gin: And here I thought you'd already sucked on something else besides ramen.

Kat: Don't be stupid!

Kat: As if Ikumatsu-dono and I would ever have ***, get **** and *****,

Kat: or worse, **** like *******!

Gin: Uh, I never said anything that vulgar.

Gin: Yeah, you have always been the passive sort.

Gin: So you wanna pound the pavement here and then pound Ikumatsu while you're at it, huh?

Gin: If that's how it was, you shoulda said so sooner.

Gin: I can give you a discount on the cupid service.

Kat: I didn't ask for that!

Gin: Don't play dumb! I know your tastes inside and out!

Gin: You've always been into married women.

Shin: That's one weakness I didn't expect.

Gin: Come to think of it, your first love as a kid was a neighborhood widow—

Kat: You dare insult a samurai?! Keep it upand I won't hesitate to cut even you down!

Kat: I'm not into married women!

Kat: I'm into cuckoldry!

Shin: You just exposed a fetish that's totally unbefitting a samurai!

Kat: And it's not Ikumatsu-dono that I'm in love with!

Kat: It's the taste of her soba!

Kat: She inherited that from her husband,

Kat: and I just want to make that man eat it one more time.

Kat: Eat that bowl of ramen she promised her husband to serve.

Gin: How admirable.

Gin: You wanna pound the pavement to help her fulfill her promise with your love rival?

Kat: Unfortunately, we're not rivals in love.

Kat: It's not something I will ever be.

Kat: Because Ikumatsu-dono only has eyes for one man.

Bum: Hey, what's all that about?

Bum: That's one young newcomer.

Kat: Pleased to meet you.

Kat: I grew sick of being a samurai, quit sticking swords in people,

Kat: and chose to stick myself in a cardboard box.

Kat: My name is Katsura Kuzutaro.

Kat: I hope to get along with all of you. You may casually call me Kuzura.

Bum: For someone who grew sick of his life, you're awfully lively, Kuzura-san.

Kat: I'm not Kuzura! I'm Katsura!

Kat: And this here is my partner, Kuzuta—

Gin: Hey, how did things end up this way?

Bum: The other guy's got the same look in his eyes as us.

Bum: Welcome, Kuzuta-san.

Bum: Hey, nice to meetcha.

Gin: As if! Don't lump me in with you lot!

Kat: The best people to ask about a homeless man are the homeless.

Kat: I came up with this cover to make them less wary of us...

Kat: But I'm amazed you blended in instantly. That's my Kuzuta.

Gin: That doesn't make me happy!

Gin: I really should've gone looking for the scarf store with Shinpachi and Kagura.

Kat: Sorry, but who among you knows a lot about this stuff?

Kat: I have a lot of questions regarding the cardboard life.

Bum: Oh, then you should go meet the Lawd. You can introduce yourself, too.

Kat: The Lord?

Bum: Yeah. The chief of cardboard boxes and leader of all the homeless here.

Lawd,Sign: Lawd

Bum: We call him Lawd, for Leader At the Waste Dump.

Bum: The Lawd knows all, and he can solve most problems you might face.

Musashi: What's going on? It's awfully noisy.

Bum: It's the Lawd! The Lawd has graced us with his presence!

Gin: Hey, what are you doing, Hasega—

Mu: Men, throw these two out of Eden at once.

Gin: Uh, what are you talking about? What the hell is "Eden"?

Gin: Hey, stop talking through an interpreter.

Gin: You're totally made in Japan.

Mu: These two bring disaster wherever they go.

Gin: Uh, I don't wanna hear that from a walking disaster.

Gin: I'm willing to ask as many times as it takes.

Gin: What are you doing? Why are you here at your age, Hasega—

Mu: Quit chanting the Hasegawa death spell!

Gin: It's your damn name! And use your own mouth to speak!

Gin: You're pissing me off!

Mu: The lower realm's mores don't apply here.

Mu: This is Eden.

Mu: A different world where those who have been liberated from everything gather.

Gin: That so?

Gin: I don't care if you're Hasegawa-san or the Lawd anymore.

Gin: Just trash either way.

Mu: Who're you calling trash?!

Gin: Say, did you ever see anyone wearing this scarf—

Mu: Can't answer that.

Mu: Everyone here is truly free.

Mu: Nobody is allowed to pry into or bring up their past lives!

Mu: And we have no information to share with outsiders.

Mu: If you wish to become one of us so badly,

Mu: offer me bags of empty cans and

Mu: discarded convenience store lunch boxes as tribute.

Mad: Got that, uh... Kuzuta-san, was it?

Mad: Only the people who were at rock bottom in the lower world can make it to the top here.

Gin: If you're gonna laugh, do it yourself!

Bum: Lawd!

West: Pick up empty cans?

West: Save yer sleeptalkin' for when yer asleep.

West: I thought we made it clear this was our yard.

West: All the empty cans and discarded convenience store lunch boxes are ours!

West: You louts hurry up and get outta this park already!

Gin: Who the heck are those guys?

Bum: The Westside g*ng!

Bum: The armed cardboard g*ng who control the west side of this park!

Gin: What the hell is an armed cardboard g*ng?

Bum: They're upstarts that use violent oppression to expand their rule on cardboard!

Gin: Wait, what? Did we enter the Warring Cardboard Era while I wasn't paying attention?

Mu: Get outta here!

Mu: This is a free utopia!

Mu: We won't hand it over, no matter how many times you try.

Gin: You're stepping on the Lawd! He was trying to say something!

Mu: We won't give in to v*olence!

Mu: We only fall to our knees in our cardboard boxes!

Gin: But the Lawd's totally giving in to v*olence beneath you!

Gin: And this interpreter's just running his mouth now, isn't he?

Bum: Interpreter? What are you saying, Kuzuta-san?

Bum: This is the Lawd.

Gin: What?! He was the Lawd all along?!

Gin: Then what was with the old man next to him who was dressed all godlike?

Bum: That's the guy always mumbling something by the Lawd's side.

Gin: In the end, you've hit rock bottom in this world, too!

Bro: Now there's a face that takes me back.

Bro: I found an unexpected diamond buried in the trash.

Bro: I see.

Bro: So you came here, too...

Bro: Katsura!

Kat: Y-You're...

Gin: Who are you, again?

Bro: Don't interpret for the people watching at home!

Bro: Don't tell me you forgot...

Bro: How you got me thrown in jail for that woman

Bro: and reduced me to being homeless!

Gin: I see.

Gin: After crossing swords with you at the Land of Korin,

Gin: I never expected you to return as a cyborg.

Bro: That's Mercenary Tao!

Bro: Just look at the quality difference in our comebacks!

Kat: I remember now! You're Ikumatsu-dono's brother from back then...

Kat: Fancy running into you here.

Bro: I'd rather you didn't sum it up so easily.

Bro: I mean, ever since then, I've lived my life thinking of nothing but you guys.

Bro: You two ruined my life,

Bro: so I was chomping at the bit for a chance to get my revenge on you two!

Kat: Oh? By becoming king of this cardboard mountain?

Kat: Talk about a roundabout revenge.

Bro: Look, I know that you're here to look for that man.

Kat: What are you talking about?

Bro: Don't play dumb.

Bro: I know all about it.

Bro: How my brother desperately looked for him here while he was still alive.

Kat: Ikumatsu-dono's husband did what?!

Bro: How that man visited that filthy ramen place every year,

Bro: and just who he is, too.

W: Um, if I may ask, where did you get this?

Shin: Oh, we're looking for its owner, too.

W: This crest on the lining certainly is Nishikiya's.

Kag: Really? Does it ring any bells?

Kag: Did some filthy old man come here to buy it?

W: This isn't one of our products. It belonged to the master of Nishikiya.

Kag: Master? Like the boss of this place?

W: Yes. I remember him wearing it with style whenever he went out.

Shin: Where is he? Where is he now?

W: He passed away around years ago.

W: Why would this thing show up after all this time?

Shin: Um, was it given away to someone after he d*ed?

Shin: Are there any family members who might know?

W: Just the young miss.

W: But she was very young when her father d*ed.

W: She probably doesn't remember anything.

W: Nishikiya is a textile store that the master and mistress built themselves.

W: Right when they'd overcome hard times and put up shop, the master passed away.

W: After that, the mistress made the store grow this big all by herself.

W: But she d*ed six years ago, too.

W: On top of that, the young miss lost her husband.

W: So even if she doesn't remember anything anymore,

W: I'm sure the young miss will be delighted if she sees this.

I: I wonder about that.

I: After having the scarf taken without permission

I: and people sniffing around without her knowing,

I: even the gentle young miss might get angry.

I: Just kidding.

I: Delivery for you, Osono-san.

Bro: Katsura, I came here to k*ll that man.

Bro: "That man" being Ikumatsu's dad, who is said to have d*ed years ago.

I: Oh, you're trying to find that homeless man using this scarf?

I: Jeez, you could've just told me.

I: Sorry you went through all this trouble for my sake.

I: Yes.

I: The scarf belonged to Nishiki Matsugoro, Nishikiya's founder, who d*ed years ago.

I: And I'm Matsugoro's daughter, Nishiki Ikumatsu.

Shin: Y-You're Nishikiya's heiress?

I: Sorry I didn't mention it. It's just not me, you know?

I: Running a ramen restaurant suits me much better, right?

I: Of course it does.

I: Nishikiya may be one of the top textile showrooms now,

I: but until it was started, we lived in abject poverty.

I: But while life was hard, we had fun.

I: Even if we had nothing to eat, the three of us supported one another as we lived.

I: But it all came crashing down the moment we became able to live a decent life.

I: Ironic, right?

Shin: If I may ask, how did your father pass away?

I: I was really young back then, so I have no idea.

I: Besides, he was living elsewhere with his mistress back then.

I: As soon as our store got on track,

I: he apparently made a move on one of the girls working here.

I: Mom found out and threw him out.

I: Not long after that, we heard that he'd d*ed of illness.

I: People were saying he deserved it for abandoning his wife and daughter,

I: but I still remember how sad my mother looked then.

I: I don't know how the scarf found its way to that homeless man,

I: but I'm guessing it means my dad was living a similar life to him.

I: Thinking about it that way, I just can't think of him as any old man.

I: Sorry I made you waste your time for me.

I: Ultimately, maybe people are best off when they have to fight to live another day.

I: The moment we have more than we need, our eyes start to wander.

I: I feel like we could clearly see what was important when we were poor.

I: If it weren't for that, I'm sure his eyes wouldn't have strayed from us.

I: And we would've been able to forgive him, too.

Kat: Ikumatsu-dono's father is alive?!

Bro: That's right. He was barely scraping by in this dump.

Kat: No way. You mean the homeless man who kept visiting the restaurant was...

Bro: Wait, you really didn't know?

Bro: And Ikumatsu didn't realize that he was her father?

Bro: That's funny.

Bro: She forgot what her own dad looked like?

Bro: Of course you'd forget about a scumbag who left his family for another woman.

Bro: Isn't that right?

Bro: How long are you gonna stay silent? I know you're here.

Bro: Whatever.

Bro: I'm sure the kindhearted Katsura-san can't sit tight after learning all this.

Bro: Katsura, you bring Ikumatsu's old man to me.

Kat: What?

Bro: Don't get any funny ideas.

Bro: I control pretty much all the homeless in this town.

Bro: I think some starving homeless even camp out at the dump near the Hokuto Shinken.

Kat: You knave!

Bro: This is my revenge.

Bro: Bring me the head of the father of the woman you love.

Bum: Lawd, what should we do?

Bum: The Lawd was right.

Bum: Those guys really brought about a disaster.

Bum: We should've thrown them out right away.

Bum: Who's Ikumatsu's old man, anyway? I've never even heard of someone like that.

Mu: No need to worry.

Mu: We already found Ikumatsu's father.

Mu: Hurry up and take this man in shades to that punk.

Mad: What're you pulling the Lawd's strings for?!

Mad: Who're you calling Ikumatsu's old man?!

Kat: You must endure this, Hasegawa-dono.

Kat: Ikumatsu-dono has practically been taken hostage.

Kat: We can't do anything unless we shut up that knock-off Mercenary Tao.

Mad: Before that, do something about this knock-off Commander Ikari!

Mu: Listen up. Use Shades as a decoy to distract the enemy.

Mu: In the meantime, I'll guide these men outside the park via this secret passage.

Mad: Why's the Lawd getting into it, too?

Kat: Lawd...

Mu: Instead of looking for her father,

Mu: you must first ensure the daughter's safety.

Mu: Don't lose sight of your cause.

Mu: And my cause is... No matter whose father or how big a scumbag they are,

Mu: I will protect everyone here!

Mad: But you're not protecting me at all!

Mu: We should work together.

Bum: What are you talking about, Lawd?

Bum: You're half-senile, fool. Can you really show them the way?

Mu: Who're you calling a fool?!

Mu: I plunged into the straight man routine the moment I was born!

Mu: This way! Follow me!

Bum: Where are you taking a plunge now?!

Bum: Hey, we'll handle things here, so take care of the Lawd.

Mad: In the end, I get to lead this band of idiots?

Mad: I'm done with this crap. I'm gonna leave this place and find a proper job.

Kat: I still can't believe that homeless man was Ikumatsu-dono's father.

Kat: He was going to see her unbeknownst to all, huh?

Kat: And he hid who he was due to the guilt over abandoning his family?

Kat: In that case, why did he suddenly stop showing up?

Kat: Because he'd seen that his daughter was blessed with happiness?

Gin: She lost her husband, and now a weird guy with long hair is stalking her.

Gin: Nobody would consider her blessed.

Kat: I never stalked her!

Gin: Keep it down. What if they hear you?

Gin: You're not used to straight manwork. Don't push yourself.

Mu: Yeah! Let me plunge into the straight man routine instead!

Mad: Seriously, where do you think you're taking a plunge?!

Mad: The Lawd's getting swept away!

Gin: You've got it wrong, Hasegawa-san.

Gin: This straight man really wants to plunge into Ikumatsu's pus—

Mad: Hey, knock it off!

Mad: I can't handle these three stooges!

Gin: H-Help!

Gin: I... I can't swim!

Kat: Screw you!

Kat: When did I say I wanted to plunge into Ikumatsu-dono's *****, *****, or *******?

Mad: Look, we don't have time for that! Help me rescue him!

Mu: I'll take the plunge instead!

Mad: Why?!

Mad: I can't deal with this!

TBC: ,To Be Continued

Preview,Sign: Preview

Mad: Once this chaos blows over, I'm going to seriously look for a job.

Mad: I mean it. This isn't a death flag or anything, okay?

Mad: I'm serious, by the way.

Ep Title,Title: A Family

Gin: Next time: "A Family."

TextR: A series of surprising reveals

TextL: from a complex web of relationships.

TextR: The next episode features so many twists and turns,

TextL: you'll stop worrying about whowould ever hire Madao.