02x02 - Mother's Daze

[bunniefuu]

[music starts]

[Birdie] "Happy th
Birthday, Fred."

Always nice when someone remembers
your birthday. [Whispers] May th.

A Central Park bench plaque,

whether you're commemorating a
special birthday or a special moment.

"To Benny, who Heimliched me at
a halal cart. You're my Gyro."

A plaque on a bench is a fancy New
York way to sit on life's milestones.

"I love you, Mom." Not super creative,
but it gets the point across.

And it's especially relevant
today, since it's Mother's Day.

Segue.

[clatters] -Shh. You're
gonna wake up your mom.

I changed her alarm from a.m. to p.m.
so we could make the final arrangements.

Sounds like we're
gonna k*ll her.

We're gonna k*ll her with
love and thoughtfulness.

This year, we're
gonna blow her mind

by continuing the Mother's Day
festivities beyond breakfast in bed.

Wait, what? It's still
Mother's Day after : a.m.?

Yep. We're going the whole day. Or
at least until Mother's afternoon.

You kids have a few more hours
to get your gifts squared away.

I'm gonna shock her when she
realizes I didn't make her something

like I usually do.

This year, I bought her something with
my own money because I'm a big boy.

She'll be like, "What? Thank
God we had a second child."

So, we're sure about this?

I mean, after so many
years of phoning it in,

do you think going all out
this year will confuse her?

Confuse her by how
much we love her.

Your mother goes all out for us.

Your birthdays, your Christmases,
your lost teeth, your found teeth.

And that's why today,
we're stepping it up.

♪ She gives us the world ♪

♪ And today is the perfect day ♪

♪ To shower her With
more love than the rain ♪

♪ She cannot be outdone ♪

♪ At least we can try ♪

- ♪ We gotta raise the roof ♪
- ♪ You're showing your age ♪

♪ I just want to
out-celebrate my wife ♪

♪ She's finally gonna have
The perfect Mother's Day ♪

♪ One she'll brag about ♪

♪ Dropped the ball so many
times But not anymore ♪

♪ We gotta go all out ♪

[Owen] ♪ We're gonna give her the
world ♪ -[Molly, Cole vocalizing]

♪ And every little anything
That she deserves ♪

♪ We are gonna blow
her frigging mind ♪

[Molly, Cole] ♪
Get ready, Mama ♪

♪ She goes beyond and above
♪ -[Molly, Cole vocalizing]

♪ The best to ever do it
In the history of moms ♪

♪ All that Plus nine
months without wine ♪

[together] ♪ days ♪

♪ All you think about is everybody
else But today is all about you ♪

♪ She goes over the top
♪ -♪ To show her love ♪

♪ She pulls up to my school
In a sea of balloons ♪

♪ And homemade cupcakes
That's iced with my face ♪

[Cole] And mine!

[Owen] ♪ I got my braces
off ♪ -♪ A year ago ♪

[Owen] ♪ She threw a pearly
white Themed party for me ♪

♪ We gotta out-theme her
For once in our lives ♪

Good luck.

♪ She lives in mom jeans ♪

- ♪ And rarely combs her hair ♪
- ♪ But she looks damn good ♪

♪ She always puts us
first Yet another reason ♪

[all] ♪ For us to go all out ♪

[Owen] ♪ We're gonna give
her the world ♪ -[vocalizing]

♪ And every little anything
That she deserves ♪

♪ We are gonna blow
her frigging mind ♪

♪ Get ready, Mama ♪

♪ She goes beyond and above
♪ -[Molly, Cole vocalizing]

♪ The best to ever do it
In the history of moms ♪

♪ All that Plus nine
months without wine ♪

[together] ♪ days ♪

♪ All you think about is everybody
else But today is all about you ♪

Okay, you guys know the plan.
Breakfast in bed from now until : .

Then Mom and Dad romantic stroll
time from : till : .

Then we meet you at the zoo,
where you'll give her your gifts

and the world's best
Mother's Day continues.

So, zoo at two. Zoo rhymes with
two. That'll help you remember.

Zoo at two, zoo at two.
I hope I've got it.

Make sure your presents
are wrapped and ready.

I am % ready. I
just need to wrap it.

You sound ready.

Look at those sentimental slobs,
dragging their mothers all over the park.

It is Mother's Day.

What are you doing here?
You have the day off.

See you tomorrow. Unless you
enjoy my Mother's Day routine,

where I dress Shampagne up
as my long-deceased mother.

- Which is completely normal.
- Yep, totally normal.

Oh, Mother, it's such a
joy to have tea with you.

But of course you're here
because you love me so much.

After this, we'll
braid each other's hair

- and then go on a shopping spree!
- Oh, Lord.

Before you leave,
take my drink list

- for the day down to Lionel.
- On it.

I think Mother made a little
poo-poo in the corner.

Classic Mother.
I'll clean it up.

[Birdie] Helen hasn't had a day
off in forever, and she's ecstatic.

I mean, you can't tell that
she's ecstatic by her face

and the dullness of
her eyes, but she is.

She has a few ground rules to
lay out for the hotel employees

before she takes her day off.

Don't bother Bitsy.
Don't bother Bitsy.

Don't screw up and
don't bother Bitsy.

I've secretly appointed one of
you to report on the others.

- It's Philippe.
- Huh?

So whenever Jack
Nicholson comes in, I say,

"You can't sit over there.
You sit up here by the bar."

- How come?
- Because I like to tell him,

"You can't handle
the booth." [laughs]

- Hello, Lionel.
- I thought you had the day off.

Yep, I'm going. I'm just
dropping off Bitsy's drink list.

: , : , : . Then
no drinks till : ?

- That's when she pees.
- She pees for an hour?

It's a slow drip.[Phone rings]

Yeah, three mimosas and
a screwdriver, got it.

Room service order?

Yep, I'm just gonna ask the
service bartenders to make those.

Oh, wait, Bitsy fired all of them
last week, so I guess I'll make them.

Listen, I told Bitsy you were struggling
down here without the extra help.

- And? What'd she say?
- She just flicked a shrimp at me.

- What does that mean?
- I don't think it's a good sign.

Maybe I'll just
talk to her myself.

I wouldn't do that, unless you
like shrimp flying at your face.

She goes for the eyes.

Just make her drinks and we'll
deal with this when I get back.

All right. Thankfully, I've got these
two talented guys to help me out.

My arms.[Laughs]

[hums] Check out
what I got for Mom.

- Oh, nuts. I was afraid this would happen.
- What?

That's gonna look like
crap compared to my gift,

- which I bought with my own money.
- Which you bought with my own money.

- We know.
- A stunning pearl necklace for a princess.

These are fake.

What? They're fake? But
they're from the drugstore.

They wouldn't sell fake pearls at
the drugstore. It's against the law.

- They're plastic.
- Yeah.

- Pearls aren't made from plastic?
- No, they're made from oyster stuff.

Oyster stuff?

[gasps] Oysters make pearls?
Was this on the news?

I can't give her this junk!

That's it. I'm making her
a card like every year.

No! We're not little
kids anymore, remember?

You're a big boy. That's why
this year we bought her stuff.

You're right. Mom needs a
real gift, like real pearls.

I need pregnant
oysters, stat!

I don't think
that's how it works.

- Then we gotta go shopping.
- Who's we?

If you're not with me, I might
buy her a fake hat or something.

What's a fake hat?

- Are any hats real?
- Okay, I'll go with you.

Milk and three sugars,
just the way you like it.

- That's very sweet.
- I'm a good husband.

I mean the coffee. Three
sugars is very sweet.

I also got you this.

Oh, that's so nice. Also, I love
having to carry things on a walk.

Get to carry things on a walk.

Shall we continue on with our
already incredible stroll?

And if we happen to find ourselves in
an admittedly touristy swan boat...

- Gosh darn it.
- What?

It's nothing. Work stuff.

Sorry, didn't mean to curse.
Ignoring it. Today is your day.

- No, what is it?
- That's an unsanctioned plaque.

What does that mean?

People who don't wanna pay the
money put up their own fake plaques.

- Sentimental punks, I guess.
- Aw.

"It's all really
valuable, just keep going.

You'll find the next plaque where
the streetlight is glowing."

Great! Not even sentimental,
they're just regular punks.

There's a process for plaques.

You fill out forms, you follow the rules.
What's not fun about forms and rules?

Huh. "You'll find
the next plaque"...

No, no, no. No reportering.

We're not doing an investigative
piece about this plaque-simile.

[grunts] It comes right off
and we're gonna keep moving.

"Where the streetlight
is glowing."

I just wanna see one
thing, real quick.

Paige, I have a super-thoughtful
schedule that we kinda wanna stick to.

Don't plaque-block me.

[Bitsy] What's that, Mother?

You're sorry you went to Europe on
my birthday every year for years?

Oh, I forgive you.[Licking]

[phone beeps] One o'clock?

Where's my :
Schnapps Goes the Weasel?

Huh. Why am I so
unstable?[Rattling]

I mean, other than my childhood.
Oh, my God. I'm sober!

[groans] Dear, God!
I'm going to die alone!

Shampagne will eat
my corpse.[Sniffing]

Stop that! I'm not dead yet!

I just need my frigging
room service! [Sighs]

Helen! Check the
dumbwaiter. Helen!

Oh, right, I keep forgetting.

[gasps, groans]
Must get drinkie.

[quiet piano music plays]

Ms. Brandenham,
how's everything?

Thirsty. You're three
drinks late, Lionel,

- and you've sh*t my pee schedule to hell.
- Sorry.

I'm backed up, 'cause... Actually,
maybe now's a good time to talk to you.

Gross. Trust me, it's not. Make
me a Schnapps Goes the Weasel.

I just really need
you to...[spits]

To hire back the...[spits]

Service bartenders.[Spits]

Put drinkie in mouthie.

Listen, Bitsy, I'm the only person here
who knows how to make your crazy drinks.

Which is bad news for you,

because if you don't hire back
the service bartenders, I'll quit.

- [spits] What?
- You heard me.

Take it up with Helen.

She's in charge of the babies
and wah-wahs in the hotel.

Which is what I'm
hearing. Wah-wah!

Helen's not here,
so I'm telling you.

And if I leave, all of my
customers leave with me.

"Wah-wah. I'm Lionel.

Now I have to make drinks for
the service bar too. Poor me."

♪ It's all so draining ♪

♪ Not that I'm royalty ♪

♪ But so much complaining ♪

♪ Where is his loyalty? ♪

♪ I'm hardly a matron ♪

♪ Yet I stand accused ♪

♪ Decades his patron ♪

♪ Just bring me my booze ♪

[ice tinkles]

♪ Pour, poor me ♪

♪ More, more, please ♪

♪ I'm so, I'm so thirsty ♪

♪ Pour, poor me ♪

♪ More, more, please ♪

♪ I'm so, I'm so thirsty ♪

♪ I could have been a doctor ♪

♪ But I took my
skills to libations ♪

♪ A master serving
master glasses ♪

♪ She's finally in perspective ♪

♪ The disrespect she has shown ♪

♪ Shellacked and cracked
In lacquered plaster ♪

♪ You can't put a
price on magic ♪

♪ But he brings us booze ♪

♪ Now anyone can
be your friend ♪

♪ But Lionel brings us booze ♪

♪ Pour, poor me ♪

♪ More, more, please ♪

♪ We're so, we're so thirsty ♪

♪ Pour, poor me ♪

♪ He gave me his pants
♪ When I needed pants ♪

♪ He built my son's
science project ♪

♪ He let me call him dad
♪ -♪ We're so thirsty ♪

♪ I'll give you a
shoulder to cry on ♪

[patron ] ♪ He taught
me how to ride a bike ♪

♪ He bailed me out of prison ♪

[patron ] ♪ He invested
in my start-up company ♪

[patron ] ♪ He found
my birth parents ♪

♪ And some free
advice ♪ -♪ Pour me ♪

Too much talking to
people. So sober.

Helen! Helen! Pick up!

[woman screams]

Oh, that's you. We
have the same ringtone.

Mm-mmm, doesn't feel special.

[sniffs] Doesn't smell special.

Doesn't say special.
Don't you get it, Molly?

We're supposed to
bring it this year.

Hey, my scarf is bringing it.

Okay, I didn't
wanna say anything,

but a piece of cloth you put
around your neck for some reason?

I mean, for when it's cold?

- Follow-up question. Seriously, a scarf?
- Oh, God! Maybe you're right!

Now we both have to get
her something. Tongs?

Great. You buy those, I'll look
for something that doesn't suck.

[Birdie] So, they're spiraling,

but Paige is four plaque-similes
in, and she couldn't be happier.

She loves a puzzle,
a riddle, a hunt.

Any kind of hunt. Helen Hunt.

"I didn't want the
farmer to nab it,

so I buried the carrots.

Go see the rabbit."

- Owen! It all makes sense now.
- Really?

Yes! This one
mentions the score,

this one mentions green,
this one says, "the lamb."

- Don't you see what this is about?
- Whole Foods?

No! Somebody robbed a bank.

The cops were closing in, so
they buried it in the park.

They left clues so "the farmer,"
whoever that is, could find the money.

That seems like a bad plan.

Someone sounds judgy. How
many banks have you robbed?

I'm sorry. You're right.
Makes perfect sense.

They outran the cops, made plaques and
defaced public property. It's your day.

You're going down a rabbit hole,

but I'm not saying anything
about it because I'm a cool guy.

I'm sorry. I know you have
a big day planned for me.

I promised you...
[gasps] Rabbit!

There's a rabbit in the Alice
in Wonderland statue! [Panting]

That's where we're going.

[door beeps]

"Welcome to the
Hudson Hills Spa,

where your spirit is like
this fruit basket, free."

[sighs] Time to
let my hair down.

Haven't done that in a while. Guess
this is just the shape my hair is now.

[music starts]

♪ I'm finally free ♪

♪ No taking my
orders from Bitsy ♪

♪ A day just for me ♪

♪ I'm so overworked
from that jerk ♪

♪ But just let me
forget In the spa jets ♪

Oh.

♪ Look at this menu
What's a spleen massage? ♪

♪ Can I order that
service to my room? ♪

[concierge] Yes, ma'am.

♪ Do not disturb ♪

♪ Gonna finally pee Without
somebody calling for me ♪

[concierge] Yes, ma'am.

♪ I don't wanna move A
single muscle at all ♪

♪ Don't be scared It
might seem like I'm dead ♪

[concierge] Uh, okay.

♪ The spleen massage people
Should let themselves in ♪

I'm not leaving
this bed. [Sighs]

♪ This is it I'm no longer
at her beck and call ♪

♪ This is it ♪

♪ Spread eagle in
nothing but my drawers ♪

♪ It's the day you've been waiting for ♪
-♪ It's the day I've been waiting for ♪

♪ Longer than you'd
ever believe ♪

[Helen, chorus] ♪ This is it ♪

♪ Gonna have to drag me
out To make me leave ♪

- I'm really gonna leave, Bitsy.
- Go. I'm fine here.

I can reach everything.
Not a problem.

Oh, my. I can't...
What does this say?

I can't read when I'm
sober. I have single vision.

- This is your last chance. I'm leaving.
- I'm already over you.

Where are those square things you
put in your drinks to keep them cold?

They look like glass, but
they're not. Ugh, so sober.

I'm at the door. I'm going.

Thanks for the play-by-play.

Who's gonna hire a washed-up old
bottle jockey like you anyway?

The Dagmont.[Plate clatters]

That's cool. Totally
don't care at all

that you're gonna work
at my hotel arch nemesis.

Well, then, after
years, goodbye.

- Oh, you'll be back.
- Okay, g*ng, to the Dagmont.

To the Dagmont, everybody.

And, Bitsy, I'm still waiting
for my French dip to arrive,

so if you could send that over.

[shouts] Damn it. I can
only reach the triple sec.

I can't drink that.
It triple sucks!

Okay. [Sighs] No plaque.
No plaque. Plaque!

- Hi, happy Mother's Day.
- Is it?

Okay, well, sorry to bother you,

but we just need to check out the
plaque on the bench real quick.

Kids, no. Kids. Kids.

- I tried everything.
- Yep, still can't see it.

Look, a dollar!

Huh. "To Piper,
a great spaniel."

They're trying to throw me
off. I'm getting too close.

I think this is a real plaque.

It's sticky. There was
something else stuck here.

Oh, yeah. My kids
ripped off a plaque.

I was gonna tell someone, but
then I was like, "I'm tired."

- Oh! They're eating my clue.
- At least they're eating.

Maybe this is a sign to
stop following these signs?

We're so close. We can
cr*ck this thing, baby.

Now, come on. Hi, kids.[Sighs]

[Helen, chorus] ♪ This is it ♪

[Helen] ♪ Look at Helen
gettin' all sun-kissed ♪

♪ This is it ♪

♪ I don't think a suit
Should fit like this ♪

[sighs]

- ♪ It's the day I've been waiting for ♪
- ♪ It's the day you've been waiting for ♪

[Helen] ♪ Remember how to
chill and how to relax ♪

♪ This is it? ♪
-[Chorus] ♪ This is it ♪

♪ How many moles Are there
on that guy's back? ♪

[groans]

[sighs] Let's just give her the scarf
and the fake pearls and a note that says,

"Sorry we're such
terrible children.

Here's a coupon to trade
us in for some new ones.

Maybe some fun twins.
Everyone likes twins."

Damn you, Mom, for being
so loving and thoughtful.

Mother's Day would've been
so easy if she was mean.

Hmm. Cole, check out
that lady over there.

Huh. Great hair, but I'm
pretty sure that's a mannequin.

No, over there. Look
at her sweatshirt.

"Number one mom." It's not true
because our mom is number one.

Yeah, it's not a
great sweatshirt.

It's clearly homemade, but
that mom looks so happy.

Excuse me. Hi. Quick question. Uh,
your daughter made that, right?

- You didn't buy something of that quality?
- [rips]

She sure did make it. Isn't
it something? I love it.

What do you mean,
"something of that quality"?

Nothing. It's so good.

Yeah, I nailed it. As
long as you never wash it.

Cole, we gotta make Mom
something, ourselves.

What? But I thought we
were past making stuff.

We graduated to the big leagues!

What about going all out, being a
big boy and spending big-boy money?

We're trying so hard with
this buying stuff stuff,

but I think moms actually
really love homemade stuff.

'Cause we made it. And they love us?
Makes me feel bad for them, but...

Well, I can't make a pearl.

Or can I? [Strains]

All we have to do is make her

the most incredible Mother's Day
card the world has ever seen.

Colored pencils, stickers,
glitter, the works.

We've gotta be at the zoo at
: . That's a lot of pressure.

Oh, God. I can't feel my
hands, my card-making hands.

- What's happening to me?
- You'll be fine. Let's go.

Please, please, please.

Pretty, pretty, pretty please?

- Dang it. Should we Indiana Jones this?
- sh**t him?

It's my day. Kidding, kidding.

Give him something
to swap it out.

Oh, you like that?

I'm doing it. I'm doing it. Yes!

I am so proud of you, sweetie. You
gave away my flower, but that's fine.

"The last clue that you must not miss is
where the honey eater does the twist."

Babe, I need you. I
need your park brain.

You know all the park stuff.
What's "honey eater" mean?

- Uh, uh...
- Faster, faster.

- I need your park knowledge.
- You're scaring me.

Oh! Honey eater. Bears eat honey.
A bear. Anything with a bear?

There's a statue of
a bear by the zoo.

I don't know if it's doing the twist,
technically, but it is dancing.

[kisses] You magnificent
bastard. Let's go.

[Bitsy] I know you're a bellhop,

but as long as the drinks are
stiff, no one will notice.

I don't know how to make
a drink. I'm a Mormon.

- Right now?
- Where's Lionel?

Lionel went to go stink up
the Dagmont, and no one cares.

This guy's great, and
you're gonna love him.

- Oh, gotta go.
- You blew it.

What's Bitsy gonna
do?[Strumming]

Without a bar, a New York City
hotel is just a weird bed museum.

Ooh, what's this? Why did
Helen come back so soon?

Turns out she's good at a lot of
things, but relaxing is not one of them.

Musical flashback.

♪ This is it Doing nothing's
clearly not my skill ♪

♪ This is it I'd
rather be working it ♪

♪ Hustling, playing the game
For the Brandenham will ♪

♪ It's the day you've
been waiting for ♪

♪ Call me if you're
ever in town ♪

♪ This is it ♪

♪ You can come And you
can let your hair down ♪

I tried to make a
Schnapps Goes the Weasel.

[spits] Ugh! Way
too much weasel.

- [Helen] I'm back.
- [Bitsy] Helen, you're late.

- Or early. I don't know. What day is it?
- Where's Lionel?

He quit. He's at the Dagmont.

Oh, my God. He did the old
wait-until-Helen-was-gone

and-then-try-to-talk-to-you-as if-you-know
how-to-talk-to-humans trick, huh?

Go get him. Go bring him back.

Make drinkies for Bitsy.

Oh, no. You're coming with me.

And that's why they
named the show Frasier.

[laughs] I love this guy. Mom
can have lunch by herself.

[Helen] Hey, Lionel, pour
us a drink, will you?

That was a dramatic entrance.

It's a gift. Now, Bitsy, is there
something you want to say to Lionel?

- Mmm.
- While we walked over here,

we talked about...[groans]

- Hiring back the service bartenders.
- Louder.

Hiring back the service
bartenders! [Grunts]

- And?
- A "sorry, I was wrong" bonus.

- Deal.
- You couldn't leave the Brandenham.

I did leave the Brandenham. You
couldn't leave the Brandenham.

- But you came back.
- You came back too.

- [sighs] What's wrong with us?
- We're broken.

- Schnapps Goes The Weasel?
- Oh, dear God, yes!

The bear by the zoo.
He's doing the twist.

He is so doing the twist.
Where's the plaque?

Where's the plaque? Where
the p... Ha! Plaque!

Excuse me, this one's
better. Over here.

Right this way. There you go.

We're gonna solve this.

"There was no crime,
but there is a treasure.

Her name's Paige Hunter,
the best mom ever."

Owen, did you...
It's not coming off.

- And it never will. It's real.
- Happy Mother's Day!

Oh, my babies.

And we're here because this spot
is very important to our family.

- Do you remember this bench, Paige?
- No. [Gasps]

- Wait a minute. Was this where...
- Mm-hmm.

Before I knew I was pregnant with
Molly, this is where I threw up.

Some hit a squirrel. I'm
impressed. I'm so, so impressed.

We wanted to go all out for
you just like you do for us.

I thought of the
bank robber theme.

I gave notes on the plaques and
was critical to the gluing process.

And I did the greatest
acting job of all time.

It was easy 'cause I do
hate unsanctioned plaques.

They're the bane of society.
Only a monster would put them up.

Today, I was that monster
and you bought it!

I can't believe
you did all this.

We knew what you'd really want
was a good mystery to solve,

but you had to
think it was real.

I totally thought it was real.

I thought maybe the bank robber had
been hit on the head, but I believed it.

Thank you? I was so worried it
wouldn't work, and it worked.

- And look what I made you.
- Aw, sweetie.

- I only had four minutes.
- And here's mine.

Sorry we didn't get you
anything from the store.

Aw, I love it. This is so much better
than buying some dumb thing at a store.

That's, um, what we
thought the whole time.

♪ You could wrap up all your
boogers And your toenails ♪

♪ And I'd still love it
Because it came from you ♪

♪ And you don't have to get
me presents Even on sale ♪

♪ There's just one thing
I need you two to do ♪

♪ Promise if you really care
Then you'll pinky swear ♪

♪ No matter what, this is a
biggie Need you to hear me ♪

♪ That even when you are
full-grown A life of your own ♪

♪ You'll always be My
sweet little babies ♪

♪ You'll let me hold your hand
When you're walking to a meeting ♪

♪ Let me tuck in your covers
When you come home from work ♪

♪ You'll let me snuggle you ♪

♪ Even though it makes
Your spouse feel weird ♪

♪ Yeah, that might
be weird for him ♪

♪ Well, then he's a jerk ♪

[Paige] ♪ And I could still
come kiss All of your boo-boos ♪

♪ And when you're sick I'd
bring you chicken soup ♪

♪ We could always use refreshers
On just how to tie our shoes ♪

♪ And you could still sing
to us When it's hard to poo ♪

- Oh, you know I will.
- Yeah, she will.

♪ Promise when you are
older Slightly bolder ♪

♪ No matter, you'll still rest
Your little head on my shoulder ♪

♪ And I can still read you
guys stories Late in your s ♪

♪ You'll always be My
sweet little babies ♪

♪ You'll let me wipe your nose
If no one's 'round to wipe it ♪

♪ You'll let me bring
you some snacks ♪

♪ Maybe ants on a log ♪

♪ I'll climb into your bed If
you've had yourself a nightmare ♪

♪ If your spouse
will just move over ♪

[Cole] Yeah, what a bed hog.

♪ Promise you'll always be
My sweet little babies ♪

♪ And I'll always be Your
sweet little husband ♪

Damn straight. [Kisses]

There's a little bit of a breeze.
I wish I had a scarf or something.

You've gotta be kidding me!

♪ She goes beyond and above
♪ -[Molly, Cole vocalizing]

♪ The best to ever do it
In the history of moms ♪

♪ All that Plus nine
months without wine ♪

[together] ♪ days ♪

♪ All you think about is everybody
else But today is all about you ♪

[Owen] ♪ She goes over the top
♪ -[Molly] ♪ To show her love ♪

[Cole] ♪ She pulls up to my
school In a sea of balloons ♪

[Molly] ♪ And homemade cupcakes
That's iced with my face ♪

[Cole] And mine!

[Owen] ♪ I got my braces
off ♪ -[Cole] ♪ A year ago ♪

[Owen] ♪ She threw a pearly
white Themed party for me ♪

[Molly] ♪ We gotta out-theme
her For once in our lives ♪

[Cole] Good luck.

[Molly] ♪ She lives
in mom jeans ♪

- ♪ And rarely combs her hair ♪
- [Cole] ♪ But she looks damn good ♪