01x08 - Rain

[bunniefuu]

Hey, guitar player Watch me backflip Watch me backflip Let me work my magic If you only knew How to laugh and dance Whether you're a pancakes Or waffles man We still got a whole lot left to learn If you only knew If you only knew We'll do something new Start a snowball fight in June If you only knew If you only knew Watch me backflip Watch me backflip Let me work my magic If you only knew How the game has changed You'd think it's kind of nice Even when it rains But take any advice With a grain of salt If you only knew If you only knew Watch me backflip Watch me backflip Let me work my magic Let me work my magic Watch me backflip Watch me backflip Let me work my magic [thunder rumbles]

[narrator]

Guy's been accused of grand theft Chickeraffe.

His circle of friends has shrunken by half! [groans]

[yells]

[narrator]

Michellee's trust has been firmly revoked, leaving our heroes outside to get soaked.

I think she likes you.

I hate that Guy! Ugh! [grunts]

They're not bad people.

Can't we just let them in until it stops raining? They could catch cold.

Our bodies are 78% water, Elanabeth.

A few more drops won't hurt.

Come on! We were having so much fun back at the carnival.

Can't you trust me on this one? I trust you, E.

B.

, but I'll never trust that Guy again.

[thunder rumbles]

There's no way she'll ever trust me again.

[Sam hums tune]

I never should've listened to you! You really should try them in the rain.

Seriously? The precipitation creates a sort of natural gravy that's literally mouthwatering.

That's a mini lightning rod! You'll zap us for sure.

Oh, IWB, inclement weather buddy, don't be so dramatic.

It's totally safe [warbles]

[warbles]

Mmm, mmm.

Extra crispy.

- I think the rain's letting up.

- [thunder rumbles]

[squawks in fear]

I don't blame you, buddy.

Well, at least the worst is over.

- Everybody knows, lightning never - Here it comes.

ever, strikes the same place twice.

[warbles]

Extra, extra crispy.

Okay, surely, there's no way it could happen a third time.

Stop saying things.

[mimics zipping up mouth]

[through zipped mouth]

At least we can't get any wetter.

[narrator]

Meanwhile, our BADGUYS are hot on the trail.

Is hot the right word? Hmm, maybe frigid or stale.

[growls]

[narrator]

Sorry.

Uh, well, this is the only evidence they left behind.

[sniffs]

Green eggs and ham.

How did they even get out of their cell? Yeah, we want the whole story.

Uh, well, they They had help.

[both giggle]

- Who? - It was a little, bitty mouse.

[giggles]

[both mimic mouse squeaking]

This story just got a mousand percent better.

[growls]

No, it didn't.

I wanna talk to this mouse.

The mouse broke out, too.

He had the cutest little blueprints and the cutest little pencil.

And the cutest little hat! - Aww! - Aww.

- Aww.

- Aww! [growls]

That is the greatest story I've ever heard.

Well, the story doesn't have a happy ending, because you and I are in big trouble with the Bigman.

[officers giggle]

So, clap your beak and swell your neck And then reverse your stance With a hop and a zip To the north, south, west Let's all do the Chickeraffe Prance! [animals groan]

[Snerz]

How was that? On a scale of ten to ten? Oh, eleven, sir.

Now, imagine how classy that will be with a large and wieldy animal by me.

It's the perfect way to embarrass my Cronies at the Gala.

That's right! The Chickeraffe Bandits have struck again.

No one knows when the stolen beast will finally be recovered, but I think it's safe to say it won't be until well after SnerzDay.

Just making a conservative estimate here.

[screams]

Enough of amateur hour! It's time for professional hour.

I need someone better to get me the animal.

- Uh, Samurai Stan? - No! - Beryl the Bounty Hunter? - No! Flamethrower Philbert? Helga the Hatchet? - Stop guessing! - Tim? - Who's Tim? And no.

- [shrieks]

[stammers]

You don't mean I do.

Get me the Goat.

Oh! [Michellee]

70,017.

Done.

[chuckles]

Want to help me seal the jar? N-No, thanks.

Mom, look at Mr.

Jenkins.

You mean that terrifying creature? He's not terrifying.

He's terrified.

[whimpering]

- [thunder crashes]

- [squawks]

[narrator]

It k*lled Michellee to see her daughter so sad.

If she kept a close watch, would it really be so bad? [sighs]

They can come inside.

Yes! [squawks]

[warbles]

[laughs]

- [warbles]

- Come with me, Mr.

Jenkins.

Let's get you warmed up.

- Count me in! - Wait, E.

B.

No, not in the living room! I know I'm not your favorite person right now, or the other day at the carnival, or when we involved you in that dangerous train chase.

The point is, we won't be any trouble, and we'll be out of your fur by morning.

I will be keeping my eye on you, Randy.

[humming]

- [gasps]

- Why don't you help out E.

B.

, and then maybe her mom won't hate you so much.

[straining]

You want me to use her to impress Michellee? You are so messed up.

The kid is the gatekeeper.

I'm not great with kids.

[chuckles]

Oh, you're not so great with adults, either.

Or Chickeraffes, or really anyone, but let's just try it.

If you're her hero, you'll be her hero.

[chuckles]

[struggling]

[clears throat]

So, you are a child.

Um, yep! [grunts]

Good eyes.

[straining]

That's nice.

All right, Mr.

Jenkins, let's get you dried off.

[squawks]

Mom, can I go help him, please? Please, please, please, Mom, please? [sighs]

Okay.

You're the best! Oh, I can't wait to fluff his feathers.

Don't let her out of your sight.

[chuckles]

I'm an aspiring Paint Watcher.

These eyes don't shut.

Yeah, that's my best friend.

Always ready to lend a helping hand or two.

Didn't you guys just meet? And didn't you guys just meet? Think about it.

- Um, maybe I'll go check on him.

- No, stay! Let's make some dinner.

Oh, okay.

Wh What sort of thing do you like to eat? Excellent question.

Green eggs and ham.

It's the dish that cannot mish.

I'm vegan.

Oh, I'm so sorry.

I didn't realize.

How long have you known? No, no, I'm not ill.

I just don't eat things like eggs and ham.

But we can make a vegan version of your favorite meal.

Uh Come on.

How do you know you won't like it if you've never tried it? I like the way you think.

Let's give it a whirl! - [sighs]

- [Mr.

Jenkins squawking]

[groaning]

Can I at least fluff his feathers when you're done? - No.

- Why? [struggling]

This is a wild animal.

It's not a toy.

[laughs]

And I promised I'd watch out for you.

- [grunts]

- [squawking]

I'm pretty impressed.

[straining]

What? You're even worse than my mom.

She's over-protective.

You're excessive-protective.

I didn't think it was possible.

Here's an idea.

Why don't you be my Dry Watcher? Dry Watcher? Yes.

Then after, you'll tell your mom how much fun you had.

Yeah.

- [Guy grunting]

- [sighs]

[grunting]

[grumbling]

[muttering]

[grunts]

[groans]

[grunting]

- [sighs]

- [gasps]

I know! We just need something heavy to weigh it down a little.

Those are your mother's.

She would never [straining]

- [air blows]

- [laughing]

See, it worked! [both]

Her SnerzDay beans! What do we do? What do we do? I don't know! I told you not to do anything! That's what made me want to do something! How are you gonna get them back? [grunts]

- Don't tell my mom! - [exclaims]

[blows]

Ahh! Mmm.

Fluffy.

Mmm.

Extra grain.

I might have a new favorite favorite dish.

It's nice having some help in the kitchen.

You know who's a real big help in the kitchen? Guy-Am-I.

Uh-huh! Also big help in the foyer, hallways.

Huge in walk-in closets.

You want this guy in your house.

That's all I'm saying.

[Guy clears throat]

May I steal you for a second? Ah! I was just talking about you.

[chuckles]

Absolutely, private conversation buddy.

Is everything okay? She's fine.

Everything's fine.

Be right back.

Fine.

Oh, and your tofu's on fire.

[gasps]

Oh! Oh.

I need you to stall Michellee while I find E.

B.

and the beans.

Also, watch Mr.

Jenkins.

Consider it done.

And whatever you do, don't spill the beans to Michellee.

But didn't you say you launched the beans out the ceiling? It's an expression.

I launched the beans out the ceiling.

Hmm, I gotta learn more expressions.

No, the other [Guy screams]

Okay, Mr.

Jenkins, this is important.

Stay.

[squawks]

Why am I even worried? When have you ever let me down? Good boy.

[squawks]

[warbles]

[warbles]

[warbles]

So, Guy tells me you're a bean counter.

Fascinating.

Tell me absolutely everything there is to know, starting right now.

Well, it was a very interesting job, and I've been doing it for 11 - No, no, actually 11.

5 years now.

- [snores]

[gasps]

I began as a number cruncher, - and I cut my teeth on the soft numbers - [snores]

- before they got crunchier.

- [groans]

Anyway, after that, I climbed the corporate ladder, - one rung at a time.

- [exerting]

- The first rung was kind of slippery.

- [snores]

[gasps]

I'm awake! [screams]

[laughs]

Whoo! [motorcycle revs]

[laughing maniacally]

[both]

Yeah! - Yeah! Bullseye! - Yeah! - Yeah! All right! - [cheering]

Whoo-hoo-hoo! [groans nervously]

Um, excuse me.

Uh, do you know where I can find the Goat? He said he'd meet me here.

[spitting]

You from around here? Uh, yes, sir.

Um, I'm not, sir, no.

[all growl]

Too bad! We have great schools! Plenty of green spaces! A fine farmer's market two days a week! And an award-winning community theater program.

[stammering]

Sounds like a great place to raise a family.

Shut up, nerd! Now hit the road before we hit you.

[Goat]

Is there a problem here? [all laugh hysterically]

Yeah, we got a problem You! Take a hike, sheep.

[Goat]

Who you calling sheep? [all growling]

[all grunting]

[blows landing]

[glass shatters]

[screams]

[exhales]

You with Snerz? Yes, Mr.

Goat.

[groans]

[grunts]

Who's my target? E.

B.

! Whoa! Are you out there, E.

B.

? - I'm here.

- [gasps]

[grunting]

Phew.

You're alive.

- Let's get you back.

- [grunts]

I have to find those beans.

My mom was just starting to trust me, and I don't wanna mess that up.

No beans.

We need to get back safely.

Your mom finally let me in and Well, I don't wanna mess that up.

Let you in? Yeah.

[stammers]

Into the cabin.

Wait a minute.

You like my mom! No.

No, I don't.

You do! You totally have a crush on her.

Fine! Maybe I got a little one, but she hates me.

I really need your help here.

[scoffs]

And you've been using me to get in good with her.

[stammering]

It wasn't even my idea! You are so messed up! Please don't blow this for me.

Well, if you want my mom to like you, you have to do what I say.

I'm the gatekeeper.

[sighs]

Fine, you're the gatekeeper.

Now how about a piggyback? [screams]

[sighs]

Oh, no.

[screams]

[E.

B.

screaming and laughing]

[Guy]

Oh! Whoa! [screams]

[laughing]

Oh! Whoa! I'm not sure your mom would approve of that.

- Exactly.

- [grunting]

[gasps]

See? This is what under-protective fun feels like.

[panting]

[groans]

You got any ideas how you're gonna get the beans down from here? [E.

B.

]

Let's see.

[twig snaps]

[both]

Huh? [low chirping]

[grunts]

[both gasp]

[whimpering]

[sighs with relief]

Chickeraffes.

And hey, they need to be dried off.

Fluff away.

Those aren't Chickeraffes.

Oh, they look pretty Chickeraffy to me! [E.

B.

]

They're Giroosters.

[growling]

Nature's deadliest judgivores.

[growling]

They want to eat us! Relax.

Giroosters only eat one thing, beans.

Beautiful.

We're not on the menu.

Time to leave.

- [gasps]

- [snarls]

[sniffing]

[roars]

It will only validate their unentitled sense of superiority, and they will att*ck us.

- [Giroosters growling]

- I thought you said they don't eat people.

They won't, but they will chew us up like gum, and then blow bubbles with the us-gum.

And they are really, really good at blowing bubbles.

What do we do? We just have to show confidence and make them feel inferior.

- Giroosters, listen up! - [all gasp]

We're tough, and we're cool, and we rule these woods, okay? [squawking]

- [roars]

- They're not impressed.

Run! [E.

B.

screams]

No, running's the worst thing we can do right now! [snarling]

- I said, "Bill, it's impossible.

- [Sam snoring]

"Between pinto, navy and kidney, I simply cannot pick a fava-rite.

" [laughs]

[snoring]

I'm sorry.

I guess I've been talking your ear off this whole time.

Let's go check in on the others.

Huh? No! Uh, please, tell me more.

I never knew there were so many bean-related jokes in this hilarious world of ours.

I can't believe what I've "bean" missing.

"Bean" missing! [laughs]

Excuse me.

I'm just gonna go check on our friends down the hall.

Classic leg-humor.

[Michellee laughs]

- [water running]

- [exhales]

Wow, I really hope Guy likes bean jokes.

[gasps]

[chirping]

Cordon bleu! - [exclaims]

- [Michellee]

Sam! Everything okay? Uh, no! I mean, yes! I mean [stammers]

Everything is A-O-fine! [chuckles]

Right, Guy? [imitating Guy]

Uh, yeah, everything's fine.

Just having a great time bonding with your daughter.

Something grumpy but endearing.

And Sam's my best friend! [laughs]

E.

B.

, are you all right? [imitating E.

B.

]

Totally, Mom.

Guy is super responsible.

A born role model.

A role model to role models.

[imitating Guy]

Thanks, E.

B.

By the way, Michellee, have I ever told you that you smell like flowers and cupcakes? [laughs]

Just a specific observation about you that I've been meaning to share.

[warbling]

[bottle squeaking]

No, Mr.

Jenkins, you can't drink this.

This is [gasps]

the perfect size.

[yelps]

[bottle rumbling]

[bottle exploding]

I'm coming in.

[gasps]

Hey, so, seems like Guy's got everything covered.

He's great with kids.

Let's get back to those tofu eggs.

Guy's good with kids? Oh, he's the tip of the top.

Kids go gaga for Guy.

Some people are just born to dazzle, am I right? Oh, come on.

How can he possibly be as great as you say he is? Oh, he is not.

I knew it.

Ah! He's greater! A friend like that, he'll put his life on the line for you.

I mean, he'll launch the beans out the ceiling.

- What? - It's an expression.

But a couple of days ago, when I was in jail, Guy got arrested just so he could break me out.

[yelps]

Did you say jail?! [shrieks]

[shrieking]

[roars]

[E.

B.

screams]

We can't outrun them! - [growling]

- [Guy screams]

[stammers]

These things, they don't seem very impressed.

[panting]

Uh, I once held my breath for 53 seconds.

And, um, I can ride an occycle with no hands.

Whoa! - [roars]

- [chomps]

That is sort of impressive.

- What more do they want? - [E.

B.

]

You try! [shrieking and growling]

- [E.

B.

pants]

- [Guy yells]

You must have done something cool in your really long life.

Not me.

[grunts]

My inventions always blow up, your mom hates me, and I'm an aspiring Paint Watcher.

[exclaims]

See? They are better than me! You're never gonna impress them with that attitu [screams]

Help! [screams]

- No, here, here! Over here! - [E.

B.

screaming]

Chew me! Chew me! I'm the least impressive.

[screaming]

Oh, what gives you the right to judge us anyways? I mean, look at you.

- [screams]

- Huh? You haven't even evolved as a species, and you think you're better than us? - [screams]

- Huh? You still live in a shabby nest made of mud and leaves and, phew, who knows what else.

And I mean, you seem to have a a remedial semblance of a social order, but you're hardly civilized.

I mean, have you even developed an alphabet? [squawking]

- Keep doing that.

- [all growl]

Keep doing what? - Whatever that is, keep doing it! Ah! - [growling]

[E.

B.

screams]

- [screaming]

- [growling]

[E.

B.

continues screaming]

Seriously, what have you done with your lives? [screams]

I mean, I hear you're decent bubble-blowers [squawking]

But honestly, guys blowing bubbles is no big whoop.

[warbling]

I'd treat her nicely if I were you.

[squawking]

Hi.

She's the smartest kid I know.

A wizard of manipulation Hmm.

And completely self-motivated.

All the ingredients for a bright, successful future if channeled properly.

Boom! That was a status b*mb, suckers! [warbling]

Hand over the beans.

[warbling]

[laughs]

Bean-go.

Get it? [sighs]

Better get used to bean puns if you're gonna date my mom.

You mean I'll give you a glowing report if we make it back before my mom kills us.

Thanks, gatekeeper.

[stammers]

I can't believe it! A jailbird? Okay, I see you're very focused on Guy right now.

Yes! He's in there with my child.

A jailbird! Quick reminder, Guy got arrested on purpose, just to save me! Jailbird! Oop.

[gasps]

I can't look! [gasps]

We're gonna die! [screams]

[chuckles]

Hey, you have to see this.

L-Let's show 'em, E.

B.

[Guy and E.

B.

]

One, two, two and a half, three! [E.

B.

laughs]

- One, two three! - [Mr.

Jenkins laughs]

One, two, three! [Guy and E.

B.

laugh]

Oh, you you are great with her.

Uh, I guess I'm just a natural.

[clucking]

So, you really think I smell like flowers and cupcakes? Huh? Yes, I do.

That's sweet.

I guess that's the kind of Guy you are.

Are you sure it is the right Goat? Oh, yes, Mr.

Snerz.

I bet my last bruckle on it.

[gasps]

["Won't Get Fooled Again" plays]

[vocalizing]

[narrator]

This Goat's on a quest to burst Guy and Sam's bubble.

From what I can tell, he is gonna be Oh! It's right there on the license plate.

That's thoughtful.

Hey, guitar player Mmm New York's number-one cut creator Uh-huh, uh-huh Hey, speed skater T-t-t-t-take a right Let's put an ad in the papers Uh Backflip You know what to do Ooh Backflip You know what to do Ooh, let your freak flag fly Watch me backflip Watch me backflip Let me work my magic Let me work my magic Watch me backflip Watch me backflip Let me work my magic