01x08 - Codes et stratégies

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Kaamelott". Aired: January 3, 2005 –; October 31, 2009.*
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Camelot's King Arthur and his knights seek the Holy Grail.
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01x08 - Codes et stratégies

Post by bunniefuu »

(horn sound)

But I haven't said anything yet!

I'm sorry, but I
have to test it out...

No, no, that's nothing!
Nothing! Just testing the horn!

Okay so is it working?

(sounds of fighting and shouting)

There! There!

Don't run like idiots!

Give a shouty, you.

(horn sound)

Black flag!

Red flag twice!

But they're not doing what we ask at
all, they're going to the right!

It is clear, though, but...
What do I do, I call again?

Well, do I call or do I not call?!

Call if you like, what
do you want me to tell you?!

Call.

(horn sound)

So when the horn sound,
they don't even look towards it,

you can wave all
the flags you want…

Insist! Blast!

(two horn sounds)

I can't believe this, ho ! Well, if
I'm bothering you, just tell me!

Yeah, that's kind
of where it's at, yeah!

Black flag.

Red flag.

"V" flags.

A well-coordinated army
is really magnificent.

What ? You're gonna tell me
we don't look stupid with our flags?

We've been making signs for an hour,
not one is going in the same direction!

- They're struggling with the code…
- They're struggling with everything!

There's not many
things to remember, damn it:

Overflows left,
right, charge, retreat,

two or three special
signs for archers…

I know! And this code
is clear... I think.

Maybe we should have used less
signs and more colors.

Sure. That way, instead
of confusing the signs,

they would have confused the colors.

You realize we were
twice as many as them

and we are still going
to lose because these morons

can't remember
three signs of code?

- We haven't lost yet…
- Ah, there's an opening on the left, there!

Ah, we have to try this one!

Come on, give a shouty, you!

(horn sound)

I can't be true, they're not
even looking at us!

Double the call!

(horn sound)

Oh no, are they
kidding us or what?

Triple the call?

"Triple... triple",
give me your shouty thing, you!

Alright. (horn sound)

Ho! There !

(horn sound) There!
(horn sound) There!

(horn sound) There!
(horn sound) There, there!

(horn sounds)

Get your fingers out of your asses!

No, we have to sound retreat here.

- Sire?
- Eh?

I'm sorry, if we want
a chance to save

a few men, we
must sound the retreat!

They don't listen
when we sound.

Maybe when it's
retreat, they listen...

Do what you want, I don't care.

Alright. Call.

(shrill horn sound)

It's working, they're running!

But I haven't made the signs yet!

Well they're running anyway.

But they can't decide to
retreat on their own!

It's been said and said again!

Me, next pitched battle,
I'll stay in Kaamelott.

Leodagan: What?

Oh, don't talk bullshit...

- You can't do that…
- I'll to tell you:

they att*ck as they want,
they go where they want,

when they lose, they decide to walk
away without worrying about us...

I am a w*r Chief. I'm not here

to wave flags and
play the trumpet.

We'll have to find a simpler code.

- The code isn't wrong…
- I don't know what's wrong

but it's gotta be right!

Sure, the men won't be able to take

one thrashing a week
like this for long…

The men are one thing,
but it's mostly him

a w*rlord who doesn't command
anymore, it's not good.

He'll get depressed, start eating,

he'll take forty pounds.

Yeah. Alright, maybe by
changing the code...
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