05x29 - The Art of Romance (Flashback)

[bunniefuu]

(dramatic music)

- [Announcer] Robert Young

and Jane Wyatt,

with Elinor Donahue, Billy Gray, and Lauren Chapin

in Father Knows Best.

- Where you off to?

- Oh, just thought I'd go to the library.

- You're going to the library again tonight?

- Yeah.

What's wrong with going to the library?

- Well you went to the library last night, didn't you?

- Yeah.

- And the night before.

- And the night before that.

- The rate you're going,

the librarian's gonna think you're part of the furniture.

- Well, I got a lot of stuff to look up.

And you always say the treasure of knowledge

is in the library.

- True, but I didn't expectyou to mine it all in one week.

- Well, can I go now?

- Of course, we have no objection, we're just curious.

What's the big attraction at the library, books?

- Father, help.

Help, Father.

- Hold it, hold it, wait a minute.

What is this?

- It's a box of decorations.

Things I had left from the junior prom

when I was in high school.

Bring that in the living room, would you please Father?

Remember these?

- Oh, I remember the nights we worked pasting them together.

- What are you draggingthis stuff out for?

- Oh, the high school prom is next week,

and Marge Corbett's sister's on the decorations committee.

I told her she could have these things.

- The high school prom's next week?

Strange, Bud hasn'tsaid anything about it.

I wonder if he plans to go?

- He probably will if they hold it at the library.

- That's reminds me, I have to go to the library.

- You too?

- Mhmm, we have a sociology report due Monday.

Marge is bringing Judy by laterto pick up the decorations.

- Judy who?

- Judy Corbett, Marge's little sister.

Father, don't you ever get anything straight?

- I'd get things straight if you'd tell me who people are.

How was I supposed to know who Judy was?

- Well, if Judy comes by before I get back,

you give her the decorations,

and tell Marge I'll seeher at school tomorrow.

- All right.

Anything else?

- No, just tell her...

- I've gone to the library.

- Yes, Father.

- Father, don't you everget anything straight?

- Mommy, is this part of Betty's prom decorations?

- Mhmm.

Put them in that box there with the other things.

- Did Betty make this?

- I think so.

- You know something Daddy,

Betty's the smartest girl in the whole world, I bet.

- Oh, undoubtedly.

(whistles)

- Hi Marge.

- Oh hi.

Sociology.

- Yeah, me too.

- We were gonna stop by your house and get the prom stuff

on the way home.

- Fine.

Oh, it's a pretty big box, you better drive in the patio.

- Thanks Betty, Judy and I can handle it.

- Is Judy here with you?

- Mhmm, over there.

Your brother andmy little sister

have suddenly become very book conscious.

Those two have been studying there at that same table

every night this week.

Every night, Judy says "oh, I have to go to the library."

- We've been wondering why Bud's been traipsing down here

every night.

- The hysterical part of it is,

they don't do anything.

They don't speak, they scarcely look at each other,

they just sit there.

- Well they know each other, don't they?

- They must, they're in the same classes in high school.

Talk about a weird romance.

It's a real silent picture.

- Why don't they talk?

- They're terrified of each other.

Why, if someone said "boo,"

they'd run in all directions.

- See you in a minute.

- Hi Judy.

- Oh, hello Betty.

- I found the things for the prom, you'll be by later, huh?

- Okay, thanks.

- What are you doing?

Cut it out, will you?

(door closes)

- Well, I found outwhat's been drawing Bud

to the library every night.

It's a girl.

- Oh, I had a hunch that was it.

- And Judy no less.

- Judy who?

- Marge Corbett's sister.

- Oh.

- I don't think he'sspoken to us about her.

- Well he hasn't spoken to her yet.

They're both so shy, they're afraid to look at each other.

But Judy has no problem.

She has Bud hooked, it's easy to see that.

- What do you mean she has him hooked?

- Just what I said.

- Now I resent that attitude.

Because a boy finds a girl attractive

and shows a little interest in her,

you claim she has him hooked.

- Well she has.

- Oh, she has nothing of the kind.

- Oh dear, you know what she meant.

- It isn't what she meant, this applies to all women.

You insist on taking all the credit.

When a man of his ownvolition and free choice

selects a girl he likes,

the girl immediately claims she hooked him.

Chances are she had nothing to do with it.

- Oh Father, you are naive.

- Well you know the old saying, dear.

A girl lets a boy chase her 'til she catches him.

- Oh Margaret.

- Well, that's how I caught you.

- What nonsense.

Why do women insist on preserving that myth?

(door closes)

- What's everybody staring at me for?

- Anything you want to tell us?

- No, nothing.

- [Kathy] Mommy, come and help me!

- Coming.

- How are things at the library?

- Oh, I found a real interesting book.

- What's her name?

- Judy Corbett.

I mean...

I guess Betty told you, huh?

Old Big Mouth.

- Oh Bud, there's no reason whywe shouldn't know about her.

It's nothing to be ashamed of.

Come on, give me thescoop, what's she like?

- Well she's pretty cute.

Sort of.

If I could just get acquainted with her,

I thought maybe I might ask her to go to the prom.

- Well she's in your class at school, isn't she?

- Yeah, but I don't know,

she just doesn't like me, that's all.

Just doesn't like me.

- Well how do you know?

- I've been sitting next to her every day in the library

for a week, and she hasn't said one word.

- That doesn't mean thatshe doesn't like you.

She's probably just waiting for you to break the ice.

- Oh, I don't know.

That ice is pretty thick.

- Now that's the wrong attitude.

Don't wait around for some girl to sneak up

and throw a net over you.

You're the man.

You make the first move.

If you like Judy, it's up to you

to overcome her shyness and reserve.

Prove to her that you're the kind of a boy she'll like.

- How do I know I'm thekind of guy she likes?

How do I know?

Maybe I'm the kind she hates.

- Well that's the wrong way to think.

You have to assume thatshe's going to like you.

You have to bepositive and confident.

A girl likes a boy who takes command.

Be firm.

(tires squeal)

Don't sit around and wait to be hooked.

- [Betty] Father, would you turn on the patio light?

The girls have come for the decorations.

- Hello.

- Hello.

- I'm Judy Corbett.

Is Betty here?

- Yes.

Come in, Judy.

Betty, Judy's here.

- [Betty] Hi Judy, I'm upstairs.

Come on up.

(door closes)

- So that's Judy.

Seems like a nice girl.

Pretty, too.

She's all right.

- Yeah, but Dad, you could tell the way she acted

she doesn't like me.

- What do you mean the way she acted?

She didn't do anything.

Just because she didn't giggle and bat her eyes at you

doesn't mean she dislikes you.

Give her a chance.

- Did Bud let you in?

- No, it was your father.

Bud was there.

Marge is waiting for me in the car.

- I want to talk to you for a minute.

Sit down.

- And I want to talk to you too.

Betty.

Why doesn't Bud like me?

- Well, what makes you think he doesn't?

- He's been sittingbeside me at the library

every night for a week, and he hasn't said a word.

Maybe I'm just a dud.

- No you're not, he's definitely interested in you.

Why do you think he's been racing down

to the library every night?

- But he hasn't spoken to me, and I haven't said anything.

I didn't want to be aggressive.

- That's good, you've been playing your cards right.

You know why he's interested?

Because you have him confused,

he doesn't know what you're gonna do next.

- How could he?

I don't even know.

- He doesn't know that, hethinks you're way ahead of him.

- He does?

- Certainly.

This is a challenge to his superiority.

It makes it a chase, a game.

This is what a man likes.

- Where did you learn all this, Betty?

- Nothing.

One of the most obviousthings in the world.

Now let's get down to cases.

Have you a date for the prom?

- No.

I've been stalling, sort of.

Hoping Bud would ask me.

- Well he will if you play it right.

Now what we have to do is stir him up.

Get him to chase you.

- But how?

- The best way to start is get him to do something for you,

only let him think it's his idea.

The box of decorations for the prom is downstairs.

- Yeah?

- Now when you get there, you just look at the box and say,

very innocently, "I don't know if I can carry that box

out to the car."

- Yeah, okay.

- He'll carry the box out for you.

Well this'll make him feel very gallant and superior.

And when you get to the car, if you're lucky, he'll say,

"see you at the librarytomorrow night?"

And here's where tobuild a fire under him.

Just give him a teeny smile and you say,

"Maybe."

That'll do it.

If there's one word that gets a man every time, it's maybe.

- You really understand men.

I'll bet you've lived.

- Probably the best way to win her over

is to do some small favor for her,

some considerate little act, and this impresses a girl.

She likes a considerate boy.

But be sure you do this favor without her asking you.

- Well if she doesn't ask,

how do I know what I'msupposed to do for her?

- Listen to her, anticipate her wish.

Now if the girl asksyou to do her the favor,

the chances are she's setting the old trap for you.

Now don't fall for that.

- I wonder what I could do for her.

- Well, keep your eyesopen, watch your chance.

Now after you've done this unexpected little favor,

kind of surprised her, that's the time to suggest

another meeting at the library.

She'll jump at the chance.

- You know, that might work.

- Son, man to man, I guarantee it.

You'll be in command of the situation

and you'll know exactlywhere you stand.

- I gotta hand it to you, Dad.

You sure know all about women.

- Well.

- All the things there in that box.

If you need any help, just call me.

I'm an old hat atputting up decorations.

- I do appreciate this, Betty,

and I'll be verycareful with everything.

- Oh, don't worry about it.

- I don't know if I can carry this out to the car.

- Well, I'll carry it out for you.

- Oh, thank you.

Thanks again, Betty.

For everything.

- Good luck.

With the prom.

- We can put it right in here.

I do appreciate your helping me.

I couldn't possibly havecarried it by myself.

- Oh, it was nothing.

I'll see you at the library tomorrow, huh?

- Maybe.

Good night.

- Well it worked like I said, didn't it?

- Are you sure you know all about women?

- You practicing for the Olympics?

- No, I'm just in a hurry, gotta get to the library.

- Now hold on a minute.

Last night you told me Judy said

maybe she'd be at the library tonight.

She didn't say definitely.

- Oh, she'll be there.

I got to thinking about it last night.

The way she kinda smiledwhen she said maybe.

She'll be there, all right.

- Okay, you know it all.

Bud, you're being taken in.

You're falling for the very thing

I cautioned you againstin the beginning.

- Falling for what?

- The old feminine trick, the cat and mouse game.

Can't you see what she's doing with this maybe routine?

She's putting you on the defensive.

Putting you in a position where you're wondering

what she's gonna do next.

- You think she's doing that on purpose?

- Certainly.

It's the oldest trick in the book of feminine wiles.

Keep a man feeling insecure, keep him off balance.

Make him chase.

If you'll take my advice,

you won't go near the library tonight.

- Yeah, but she'll be there, and--

- Of course she'll be there.

Of course she'll be late to make sure you get there first

and have to wait for her.

Can't you see what she's doing?

She's trying to hook you.

- Well I don't really mind.

- I know, but it's the wrong way to start.

You have a lot to learn about girls,

and if you decide right now

you're not gonna let them bamboozle you,

it'll save you a lot of headaches later on.

- Then you don't think I ought to go

to the library tonight, huh?

- Well, I wouldn't.

- She'll be awful sore if I don't show up.

- No she won't, she'll respect you.

Oh, she'll probably pretend to be angry

when you see her at school tomorrow.

But you simply tell her that if she wants to make a date

to meet you someplace, she can make it definite,

no more maybe.

And believe me, from there on, you'll have no more trouble.

- Maybe you're right.

- I know I'm right.

(dialing phone)

Hello, is Judy...

Judy, this is Betty.

Oh, I'm glad I caught you.

Look, don't go to the library tonight.

- But I'm all dressed and ready.

Why shouldn't I go?

- Because Bud won't be there.

The sneaky character's getting advice from his father.

Just shows you how far you can trust men.

- Betty, I'm not ungrateful.

I appreciate your helping me and all.

But wouldn't it be easier if you just told Bud

I'd like to go to the prom with him?

- Oh no, that'd be the worst thing you could do.

Judy, have you forgotten everything I've told you?

- Well, what should I do?

- We're going to counterattack.

At exactly : this evening, you phone me.

From your house.

Right, : .

Bye.

- A little coaching from the sidelines?

- Well if Father kept his big nose out of this,

everything would've been all right.

- As it is now, we havetwo big noses in it.

Oh, why didn't you leaveBud and Judy alone?

They would've worked their problem out.

- Mother, you soundpractically subversive.

You know perfectly wellthat the relationship

between a boy and a girl is one of perpetual conflict,

a competition for supremacy.

Now the girl has to retain the initiative at all costs.

You know...

- Bud's getting his first lesson

in how to handle a conniving female.

The sooner he learns that he's got to keep the upper hand

and not be led around like a monkey on a string,

the better off he'll be.

After Judy sits around that library for a couple of hours

and Bud doesn't show up, she'llrealize she can't fool him

with that female hanky panky.

And she'll think a lotmore of him for it, too.

- Men think they're so clever, and I can't understand why.

They've never outsmarted us yet.

- Hey, it's : .

She's been sitting at the library for half an hour now.

- Well it serves her right.

- Yeah.

You know, it kind of proves she likes me, too,

doesn't it Dad?

- Of course it does.

She wants you to chase her until she catches you.

- Yeah, I'm not chasing any girls.

- That's the ticket.

- You know, I'd like to peak in the window

of the library now.

I bet she's there looking around,

wondering where I am, plenty worried, huh?

- Let her worry.

Do her good.

(phone ringing)

- That's Judy.

Answer that, will you Bud?

It's probably for you.

- Hello?

- Hello?

Is Betty there?

- Betty?

Oh, is this Judy?

Oh, are you at the library?

At home?

- I couldn't go.

I'm awful sorry, Bud.

Bud?

- Betty, telephone.

- I'll take it in the kitchen.

Judy?

This is Betty.

Oh, your timing was perfect, you fractured him.

- But I don't want to fracture him.

I just want him to ask me to the prom.

- He will, he will.

This is all leading him up to it.

Judy, you're not making him angry.

Judy, listen.

- Now what?

- That was Judy, she didn't go to the library.

- She didn't?

- Dad, I don't mean to be disrespectful,

but you and your theories onwomen aren't helping me at all.

In fact, you're just getting me in trouble.

- I'm sorry, Bud.

- Now she knows Ididn't go to the library

and she's probably sore.

- What do you mean, she's sore?

If she didn't go to thelibrary, then why should you go?

- She never said she was gonna go in the first place.

She said maybe she'd go.

You were the one who told me she was going

and told me not to go.

- Judy, there was no point in your going to the library

if he wasn't going to be there.

- Well if he wasn't there and I wasn't there,

how would anybody know if anybody was there?

- Judy, you're getting all mixed up.

Now listen.

- This was all your idea, Dad.

She wasn't playing any cat and mouse games.

Nobody was trying to get anybody to chase anybody.

Judy probably didn't know for sure

if she could go to thelibrary tomorrow night,

so she said "maybe."

She was just being honest.

Girls can be honest, you know.

- Got to be something wrong somewhere.

Women haven't changed overnight.

- [Judy] I guess I don't understand this.

What should I do now?

- What now?

Let me see.

Oh, I better call you back later.

Don't worry.

Bye.

You wanna use the phone?

- No.

I'd like to ask you a couple of questions.

- Oh, later Father, I washelping Mother with the dishes.

- Come back here.

Have you by any chance had your fine little hand

in this Bud and Judy business?

- Well she's the sister of a very good friend of mine...

- Ah ha, I thought so.

That explains everything.

You were meddling.

- I was meddling?

You were the one that was meddling,

I was trying to help them get together.

- Help them?

Oh, that's a laugh.

All this now you seeme, now you don't stuff?

Typical working of the feminine mind.

- May I cut in?

Don't you think that you two advisors to the lovelorn

have done enough damage for one night?

- There would've been no damage done

if little miss feminine strategy here

hadn't decided to run things.

- Well somebody had to do something

to break up the deadlock.

Bud and Judy would've been sitting in that library

'til doomsday.

- Where is Bud?

- I advised him to go to the library.

- Good.

Now you call Judy and tell her to meet him there.

And no more female strategy, understand?

- Yes, Father.

(dialing phone)

- Maybe I can help you find what you're looking for.

- Oh, no thanks, I'm just kinda looking.

- Is it something special?

- Yeah, it's kinda special.

- Well if you'll tell me what it is,

I can tell you whether it's here or not.

- Well, it's not here yet.

- Well if you know it's not here, why are you looking?

- I just thought it might show up.

- You looked in the index?

- No, it's not there.

- You're right.

It couldn't be in the index.

- Oh, hi Judy.

- Oh, hi Bud.

- Say, I was just thinking,

are you going to the prom?

- Maybe.

I mean yes.

If somebody asks me.

- Well, you wouldn't want to go with me, would you?

- I would if you'd ask me.

- Will you?

Well, what time'll I pick you up?

- : ?

- : okay.

- Okay.

- Bye.

- Bye.

(horn honks)

- Hi Judy.

It's Bud and Judy.

I made Bud promise they'd stop by on their way to the prom.

- Oh, we should have a fanfare.

Trumpet and a flurry of drums.

- Oh, what a beautiful dress, Judy.

- Thanks, Bud likes it.

- We gotta get to the prom early

and put up the decorations and stuff.

- You put him to work, Judy.

While you stand back and be the boss.

- Well, we gotta go.

- Have a good time.

We may stop in later and watch from the sidelines.

- I hope you will, Mrs. Anderson.

- Goodbye, have fun!

- Bye.

(sighs)

They got together at last.

- Yep.

She finally hooked him.

(laughing)

(audience applauding)

(dramatic music)