07x20 - Operation: Dinkleberg/Spellementary School

[bunniefuu]

- ♪ Timmy is an average kid

♪ That no one understands

♪ Mom and dad and vicky always giving him commands ♪

- Bed, twerp!

- ♪ The doom and gloom up in his room ♪

♪ Is broken instantly

♪ By his magic little fish who grant his every wish ♪

♪ 'Cause in reality

♪ They are his oddparents

♪ Fairly oddparents

- Wands and wings.

- Float-y crown-y things.

- ♪ Oddparents, fairly oddparents ♪

♪ Really mod, pea pod, buff bod, hot rod ♪

- Obtuse, rubber goose, green moose, guava juice,

Giant snake, birthday cake, large fries, chocolate shake!

- ♪ Oddparents, fairly oddparents ♪

♪ It flips your lid when you are the kid ♪

♪ With fairly oddparents

- Yeah, right.

[Together] wake up, timmy!

Time for school.

- What are you talking about? It's saturday...

And july!

- Not school for you, sport.

School for poof.

- Poof-poof!

- Today is poof's first day

At spellementary school.

It's important to look your best.

[Shimmering tone]

Spellementary school is where all magical kids

Learn to use their powers.

- Except me.

I never went to spellementary school.

I'll drive!

[Engine rumbling]

[All shouting]

[Heavy crash]

I never went to driving school either.

[Tires screech]

- Cool!

Leprechaun kids!

- Seth, degora, here's your lunch money.

- And magical lawn gnomes!

- Hey, you kids, stay off of my lawn.

- And elf kids!

- Here's your nappy time snack, g*ng.

[Elves laughing]

[Shimmering tone]

- Ah! Get the mosquito repellent!

- Those aren't mosquitoes.

They're magical sprites.

- Ah! Then get the sprite repellent!

Clang!

- Okay, sweetie,

I know you're probably nervous

About leaving us for the first time.

But you have to be a big boy now.

Don't cry. Be--

- Poof-poof!

- Brave.

Oh, my baby!

[Wailing]

- Don't worry, wanda.

You still got me.

I'm not a small, helpless baby, but--

[Chime dings]

- What?

I never went to parenting school either.

[Engine revs]

[Flames whooshing]

- Ah, spellementary school,

My future conquest.

They will all bow down to me before recess.

And I will teach my arch nemesis poof a lesson!

Oh, why can't you get along with people?

Oh, look who's turning goody-two-shoes on me!

[Vehicle chirps]

Now, to teach poof the three "r"s:

Reading, writing, and...

Revenge!

[Laughs evilly]

[Gagging]

Drat!

Swallowed a sprite!

[Bell ringing]

[Laughter]

[Shimmering tone]

- Hello, class.

I'm miss powers.

Welcome to spellementary school.

[Shimmering tone]

- Poof-poof!

[Loud zapping noise] - [grumbling]

- Now, before we get started,

We have a celebrity among us today,

A very famous magical baby.

And his name is foop...

- [Laughing] oh, yeah. You're too kind.

- Spelled backwards!

[All cheering]

- [Groaning angrily]

- Okay, children.

Take out your spellbinders and your magic markers.

Can anyone tell me what two plus two is?

- Death!

- [Laughs nervously] not quite, foop.

Anyone else?

- Poof poof poof poof!

- Yes, that's right, poof.

Four!

- [Groaning angrily]

[Indistinct chatter]

[Shimmering tone]

[Chime dings]

[Sprites giggling]

[Shimmering tone]

[Banging and zapping]

[All groaning]

- Poof may be popular in class,

But I shall rule the lunchroom.

Zap!

[Cackling]

[Chime dings]

[Cackling]

- Poof-poof!

- Who is there?

- Poof-poof!

[Laughter]

- You call that a joke?

Well, then, prepare to have your funny bones broken.

Knock-knock.

- [Sighs] who's there?

- Death! [Laughs crazily]

[Laughter tapers off]

[All booing]

- You will perish in flames!

[Whistle blows]

- Children, it's time for gym class.

[Shouting and laughter]

- Hey, look what poof can do.

- Poof-poof!

[All cheering]

- Oh, please!

There's nothing special about that.

Behold, playground,

As I take my mad skills to the hoop!

Well, this is awkward.

- Throw food at him again.

[All booing]

- Foop, I hope sitting in the corner will teach you

It's wrong to conjure up nuclear weapons

And aim them at your fellow students

During nappy time.

It's a good thing poof was here to disarm those warheads.

[Electronic beep]

- Yes, aren't we so very lucky to have poof around?

- Okay, children.

It's time for a first day of school tradition,

Electing a class president.

- Class president?

This may be the way to super popularity.

- Does anyone want to make a nomination?

- Yeah, I nominate the foop...

- Yes!

- Spelled backwards.

- You fall for that every time.

I do, don't i?

Well, class, I nominate... Me!

- Okay, candidates... [Chime dings]

Time to make your campaign speeches.

- Now, to wow them with my amazing oratory skills.

If anyone knows how to win the hearts and minds of children,

It's me.

Class of morons and future victims,

Slaves, underlings, and minions...

Death, people!

Fiery death!

You wonder, am I a leader?

Death!

And so, in conclusion,

Vote for me, or death, painful, fiery death.

Thank you very much.

You were very self-assured.

Thank you.

You know, I miss this "us" time.

I do too.

Let's have lunch.

Now let's see poof top that!

- Poof-poof!

[All cheering]

- What?

You applaud that?

He's only saying his name

That's all he every says.

- Okay, everyone.

Cast your vote for class president.

- [Laughs evilly]

- Now, to tally the results.

[Shimmering tone]

And it's unanimous.

The winner is...

Foop!

- Yes!

- Spelled backwards!

- Every time!

Wait. Unanimous?

But that's impossible.

I voted for me, repeatedly.

Actually, poof won me over with this speech,

So I changed our vote.

Oh, you imbecile!

Being president was my last chance

To rule the school.

Fine.

If I can't be the most popular kid

At spellementary school,

Then I'll make my own school,

Where I'll be the most popular child all the time.

[Zapping noise]

[Lightning cracking]

[Laughs crazily]

- Ah! Ah!

[Kids screaming]

- Now you will all pledge allegiance...

To me!

[Laughs evilly]

[Coughing]

Swallowed another sprite.

- Poof-poof!

[Kids gasp]

[Chime dings]

- Does mr. Popular want to fight?

It's at least two against one,

So you don't stand a chance.

[Chime dings]

The force is strong in you, poof.

Give up, and be my vice president.

I thought I was your vice president.

Pipe down!

You're the secretary of agriculture.

Join me, and together we can rule the school.

- Poof poof poof!

- You know, I can never understand you,

But I assume that's a no,

Or a punch line to a hilarious knock-knock joke.

[Warbling tone]

[Shimmering tone]

Well, if you won't join me,

You'll just have to b*at me.

And I'm certain you can't.

[Laughs evilly]

- Ah!

- Wah!

- Wah!

- Wa-ahah!

- Now, I command you to bow to me

And call me the most popular.

[Together] never!

- Seriously?

Wow. You're a tough crowd.

Well, if you won't see things my way,

You're all expelled!

[All screaming]

And now I think I shall laugh evilly

As you are all destroyed.

[Laughs evilly]

Wait. I can be bigger.

[Laughs evilly]

[Kids screaming]

- [Laughing]

[Kids screaming]

- [Laughing]

[Bell rings]

- [Giggles]

My, what a fun first day of school.

See you all tomorrow.

[Kids cheering]

- Hold the phone, broom hilda.

What just happened?

- What happens every day at spellementary school.

Everything returns to normal at the end of the day.

Haven't you heard the expression

"Saved by the bell"?

- So that's it?

All my terror and destruction... For nothing?

- Oh, not nothing.

You've earned yourself a nice, long stay in detention.

- Say what, now?

- Poof poof poof!

- Hold on.

Poof wants to give you a presidential pardon, foop,

So you won't have to go to detention at all.

- Saved yet again by my nemesis?

Noooo!

- There's my big boy!

- [Giggles]

- Aw!

- [Growls]

- Hi, foop.

I didn't know you attended spellementary school.

[Laughter]

Ooh, hang on.

You have a sprite on your nose.

I'll get it.

[Loud thwacks]

There. Got it.

Oop!

There's another one.

Hold still.

I'm gonna get a bigger shovel.

- Stop!

- I'm really gonna wind up on this one.

- Please! - Wanda, you should try this.

Oh, that's a freckle.

Eh, that's a mole.

- Doh! Curse you!

- [Humming]

♪ Lee dee dee dee

[Gasps] what?

Cloudy with a chance of rain?

This can only be the work of...

- Morning, turner.

- Dinkleberg...

[Whistling]

- Honey, your tie doesn't match your shirt.

- Deh!

Dinkleberg strikes again!

We're out of milk!

Dinkleberg has gone too far this time.

- Think maybe you're overreacting a little?

[Chainsaw buzzing]

- Why?

Just because I'm cutting my bagel

With a chainsaw?

[Chainsaw buzzing]

Curse you, dinkleberg!

- Honey, thanks for the extra fiber.

But I don't know why you keep blaming mr. Dinkleberg

For everything.

He's a perfectly nice neighbor.

- Get away from your mother, timmy.

Dinkleberg's put a computer chip in her woman brain

And turned her against us.

Dinkleberg!

I know you're listening!

And as sure as I eat my breakfast in a hockey mask,

You won't get away with this.

- Well, so much for having a normal childhood.

Anyway, I'm gonna go to school.

- Deh, no you're not.

- Ugh!

- Note to self: install a hatch above hydraulic lift.

[Screens chirping]

- Didn't this used to be my room?

- Not anymore.

Welcome to operation dinkleberg.

For years, dinkleberg has fooled everyone

With his phony "good neighbor" act.

Lending people cups of sugar,

Nursing those baby birds back to health,

Donating one of his kidneys to save my life.

Ha, like I'd really fall for that.

Timmy, it's time to expose dinkleberg

For the monster he really is.

- Uh-huh, and how exactly are you gonna do that?

- We, timmy. We!

We're going to do it.

We'll watch that fiend /

And catch him in an act of evil.

Until then, you're not leaving my side,

Except when I go to the bathroom

To try out my new kidney.

- Guys, what am I gonna do?

If my dad's with me all the time,

You can't grant my wishes.

Ah! I'll have to do things for myself!

- Deh! No toilet paper?

Dinkleberg has struck again!

- Relax, sport.

Your dad can't obsess about mr. Dinkleberg forever.

- Yeah, he's not that crazy.

- Code red. Code red!

The chicken has left the henhouse!

- Is that spy talk for "dinkleberg is on the move"?

- No, it's spy talk for

"My pants are down around my ankles."

Oh, no.

Dinkleberg's heading into his evil lair.

Switching to inside cameras.

Eeh, I forgot.

We don't have inside cameras.

[Gasps] do you know what this means, timmy?

- I hope that means you're gonna pull up your pants now.

- There's no time!

Besides, that's just what dinkleberg

Would want me to do.

We've got to get a camera inside dinkleberg's house.

And you're just the girl to do it.

Goldilocks, this is papa bear.

Do you read me?

- Yes, dad.

- It's "papa bear"!

And use the girl voice we practiced.

- [High-pitched] right, dad!

- Who is this?

- It's timmy, dad.

- Call me "papa bear"!

Now, remember the plan.

Every cookie in that box

Has a tiny camera and a microphone in it.

All you have to do is get dinkleberg

To buy those cookies.

- Well, hello, little creampuff girl.

- Uh, hi, mr. Dinkleberg.

- Girl voice!

- [High-pitched] would you like to buy a box

Of lemon creamy cookies?

- Anything to help the creampuff girls.

I'd give you a kidney, but I only have one left.

- Look, timmy.

It's dinkleberg's evil lair.

Ooh, it's shaped like a small intestine

With meatloaf walls and corn on the floor.

- That is his small intestine.

He ate the cookie.

[Flushing noise]

- We've lost contact.

Do you know what this means?

- I can never unsee what I just saw?

- No! It means you're going back in.

- This santa claus plan is foolproof.

- But it's not even christmas.

- And it never will be

If that villain dinkleberg gets away with...

Whatever it is he's doing.

[Rope snaps]

- [Hollering]

Ugh!

- Hey! Santa claus!

What brings you here in september?

- Uh... - Santa voice!

- Ho ho ho!

I brought you a stuffed panda.

- Well!

I wanted a kidney, but a stuffed panda

With a camera jammed in its head is even better.

- Ho ho!

Well, got to go.

Ugh! Ugh!

Ay!

- Now we can finally see what that psychopath is up to.

[Buzzing and beeping]

- Dear santa, thank you for the panda bear,

Which I plan to give to a needy child.

- Ooh, look at him.

He's the embodiment of evil!

I can't watch.

- Dad, get a grip.

There is nothing evil about mr. Dinkleberg.

- Deh!

Dinkleberg's gotten to you too.

He put a chip in your little girl brain

Just like he did to your mother.

You maniac!

Give me back my son!

- Hi, boys.

I brought you some lemonade.

- Deh! That's not lemonade.

That's mind-control juice!

Hi-yah!

Must escape before i, too,

Fall under dinkleberg's control.

To the escape chute!

Beep!

- Ah!

- Honey, cushion my fall!

Thud! - Ow!

- [Snoring] peace.

[Snoring] harmony.

[Snoring]

- The perfect disguise.

Now to quietly look for signs of evil.

[Dog yelps]

[Clattering and shouting]

[Loud rock music]

[Jazz music]

[Music powers down]

- [Snoring]

- Mmm, lemon creamies.

[Gagging and coughing]

Cookie cam!

- Ugh. Turner!

What a nice surprise.

And may I say, that's a lovely floral ensemble you're wearing.

- Eh-eh-eh-eh!

Please don't do evil things to me.

I'll give you back your kidney.

- Don't be silly, turner.

That's yours to keep.

How about a soothing cup of cocoa?

- Well, I do need something

To wash down the tiny camera that's lodged in my throat.

- Relax, turner.

Make yourself comfortable...

'Cause you're never going home.

You were right about me all along, turner.

The truth is, I am evil.

- You mean I was right?

Yay!

No, wait. That's bad.

Boo!

Are you gonna take me

To your small-intestine-shaped lair?

- You're already in it.

[Laughs evilly]

You see, turner, I'm the leader of a secret organization

Known as m.e.a.n.:

The ministry of evil and abusive neighbors.

- So all these years,

You really have been doing evil things to me?

- That's right!

Why, just today, I fooled you into thinking

It would be cloudy with a chance of rain.

[Swirling chimes]

[Ominous music]

- Dinkleberg...

- Then, I snuck into your closet and made all your ties clash.

[Booming blast]

- [Whistling]

Deh! Dinkleberg....

- [Cackles]

Then, in an act of evil I'm especially proud of,

I crept into your kitchen

And made sure there was no milk for your cereal.

[Laughs]

I mean-- [laughs evilly]

[Laughs evilly]

- Deeehh!

You monster!

Do you have any idea what it's like

To eat dry cereal on a cloudy day

In a clashing tie?

- Poof-poof!

- Oh, no!

Timmy, your dad's in trouble!

- Whoa, I can't believe it.

He was right about dinkleberg all along.

Now I've got to risk everything, including our lives,

To save him.

[Drill buzzing]

- Do you know what this is, turner?

- Ooh!

That's the lightweight cordless drill genie xk-

With the patented comfy-grip handle.

- That's right!

And do you know what I'm going to do

With this drill?

Never let you borrow it!

- Nooo!

I love that drill!

Oh, you're the most evil neighbor ever!

Goldilocks! Save me!

- You got it, papa bear.

- Girl voice!

- [High-pitched] guys!

[Clears throat] guys, I wish my dad was free.

- Timmy, stop talking to dinkleberg's piranhas

And hit that button.

[expl*si*n]

[expl*si*n]

You did it, son!

Now we can defeat dinkleberg together.

Eeh... To the escape chute!

I'll cushion your fall.

I've got you.

- Whoa, mr. Dinkleberg,

I can't believe you really are evil.

- Oh, I'm not really evil, timmy.

I just knew how much it meant to your father

To think I was evil.

- So you did all this just to make my dad happy?

- That's right; I even shelled out grand

For this small-intestine-shaped lair.

- Wow, you really are the best neighbor ever.

- That's why santa visits me in september.

Just don't tell your dad I'm not evil.

It would break his heart.

Now, here, take this new bike and a sack of cash,

And buy your dad some suspenders.

- Goldilocks!

I'm so happy!

- 'Cause I'm safe at home?

- Yes, yes, duh.

But also because I was right about dinkleberg being evil.

But I don't think he's working alone.

The real mastermind is our other neighbor,

Old lady marinelli,

And we're going to prove it.

- Come on, dad. Mrs. Marinelli?

She works with orphans.

- Girl voice!

- [Sighs]

- Dinkleberg!