10x12 - Spring Break-Up/Dimmsdale Daze

[bunniefuu]

[jazzy music]

- ♪ Timmy's still an average kid ♪

♪ That no one understands

♪ Chloe's his new neighbor

♪ And she's ruining all his plans ♪

- Ahh!

- ♪ All the wishes

♪ In the world

♪ So why should he care?

♪ Jorgen has reported there's a fairy shortage ♪

♪ So Timmy has to share

♪ His OddParents, fairly OddParents ♪

- More than one? - This should be fun!

- ♪ OddParents, fairly OddParents ♪

♪ Feather suit, nature boots, laser sh**ting, rescue ♪

- World peace, kale treats,

bunny feet, real neat!

- What? No! Leave me alone!

My fairies! Get your own!

- ♪ OddParents, fairly OddParents ♪

♪ Timmy, beware, you'll have to share ♪

♪ Your fairly OddParents

- Yeah, right!

[swinging music]

♪♪

[bell ringing]

[all cheering]

- Spring break! The happiest time of year!

No, kids, and the Easter Bunny's coming.

Hippity hoppity--gah! My hippity! [winces]

Now I have to hoppity. [groans]

- I'm so excited.

My parents and I are going camping the Carmichael way.

It's an environmentally-correct adventure

where we eat berries and grubs and drift off to sleep

to the sounds of the animals hunting each other in the night.

- Uh, is that a vacation, or a punishment?

- My ride's here! [donkey braying]

- Greetings, future custodians of Mother Earth.

- Weirdo parents alert.

And they're on a donkey. They never disappoint.

- Oh, this is Eco,

our sustainable mode of transportation.

He's environmentally friendly,

but not so personally friendly.

- My family's going camping too.

And here's my ride.

[engine roaring]

[horn blaring]

[jazzy music]

♪

- Oh, Timmy.

I hope you're ready to hit the great outdoors,

because I've been hitting everything with my new RV.

- What is that monstrosity?

It's like a house on wheels.

- Well, that's because it is a house on wheels.

When my family goes camping, we don't like to go outside.

- Timmy, what are you doing outside? Hop in!

You can be the first one to test out the bowling alley.

- We have a pool boy!

- Ah!

- How's Timmy going to enjoy nature

being cooped up in that thing?

- How 'bout we go find out and we'll let you know, okay?

See you. Enjoy the grubs.

- Hurry! They have a pool boy!

[horn blaring]

- [laughing]

♪

- Whoo-hoo! I'm flying with popcorn!

♪

Mmm!

♪

- Mmm! - Ah!

[shouting]

- Hey Chloe, my house on wheels has a combo

sky-diving simulator/ kettle corn machine!

Does your donkey come with anything?

- It comes with its own fly swatter,

which is handy because of all the flies.

I miss you and the fairies!

- We miss you too! But we've got kettle corn.

- I know. What if we go camping together?

- Sure, as long as I don't have to actually camp.

- Ooh. Cosmo. Wanda.

I wish that no matter where our parents take us,

Timmy and I always end up together.

[dinging]

[swinging music]

[country music]

♪

- Hmm? Ah!

Ooh!

- Hey, Clampickles.

Fancy meeting you here.

Well, we have camping to do,

so we're gonna head inside, away from icky nature.

- Oh, hey, Chloe, I was swimming

with dolphins in the aquatic center.

Here, have an éclair.

Our French pastry chef made them.

- Thank you for the éclair, Timmy,

but I filled up on grubs during the ride in.

Then again, I don't want to be rude.

- [grunts]

- Ah, look at us.

Thanks to Chloe's wish, we're all camping together.

Well, I have to go back inside.

The pool boy's leading an aqua fitness class.

- Eh, I'm not going back in there.

I got roughed up pretty bad in the kettle corn machine.

I'm safer out here.

Oh!

- Ooh, a bocce ball.

- I need another eye patch!

- Wienergristles? Ha!

That's the greatest name I've heard

since our old neighbors the Fartbarfs.

- The Wienergristles are our magical elf friends

who live in a cookie forest and are clinically

obsessed with bocce ball.

I'd love to see them. Ah!

In fact, I'd love to see anything.

- Magical forest elves?

I've always believed in them.

I told my parents they were real,

but they sent me to the talking doctor.

Dr. Moskowitz was wrong!

- Elves with an awesome name and cookies?

I am so there.

[dinging]

[majestic harp music]

Cookies growing on trees?

I love nature now.

[chomping] Mmm.

- I knew cookie trees were real.

Dr. Moskowitz was wrong about so many things.

Ah!

- Welcome, Welcome, everyone.

Come on in and have some fun.

- We're Mo and Mindy Wienergristle.

We like to sing and sometimes whistle.

- Elves talk in rhymes?

I knew it.

- Yeah, I kind of forgot about that.

It gets a little old.

- Yes, indeed. So we've been told.

- Ooh, is that a chocolate waterfall?

I love nature.

- Be right there.

I am composing a spirited

rebuttal to Dr. Moskowitz.

"Dear closed-minded quack..."

- Good neighbors. Hello.

Would you be so kind as to turn off

your carbon-spewing, ozone-depleting engine?

- Oh, sorry, Mrs. Crabpincher.

I got the premium-package RV.

It never turns off!

- All righty, I'm just gonna do my very best, then,

to respect your differentness.

- Whatever floats your boat, Mrs. Cubicle.

Honey, rev up the pollution machine.

The gentle hum drowns out the hideous sounds of nature.

- Find your bliss, honey. Deep breaths.

- [deep breaths]

[coughing]

I'm a little rattled.

I need to chant my happy place mantra.

[dreamy Eastern music]

I'm where I'm supposed to be.

I'm safe in my space.

- Ooh, looks like the premium package

didn't come with a trash can.

- I hate them because they don't recycle!

- That's a weird mantra, Connie.

- It's not a mantra!

- Keep it down, hippies!

- [laughing]

Check this out: I'm dipping

a marshmallow cloud in the chocolate waterfall.

[loud chomping]

- Don't tell my parents, but this is

so much better than grubs!

both: Our ball is in the perfect place.

Ha ha ha, and in your face.

- You guys take bocce ball pretty seriously.

It's kind of sad.

- I got this, Wanda.

I'm assuming you're still here.

[grunting]

Did we win?

- You people are garbage people.

That's what you are.

And Clark would agree with me

if he were conscious right now.

- Hey, honey. I need a snappy comeback.

- [whispering]

both: ♪ Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah

- Hey, why are you guys fighting?

- Oh, we're not fighting. We're leaving.

Come on, Chloe, help me drag your father to the donkey.

[playful music]

- Bye, Timmy.

I wish we could spend our vacation together,

but I guess that's not gonna happen.

Wink, wink.

[donkey braying]

♪

- Ah!

♪

Eh! Uh?

♪

[screaming nonsense]

♪♪

Ah! We keep magically ending up

back with the stupid Cowabungas.

We're in some kind of woodland Bermuda Triangle.

- Uh, this is bad karma, Clark.

Do you think it's the universe punishing us

for that night we slipped and ordered the meat-lovers pizza?

- Could be. - You know what I think

the universe is really telling us, guys?

That we're neighbors, and friends,

and we need to work out our differences.

- Sorry, sweetie, but that's a garbage idea!

- It's hippie talk!

♪

- Well, we tried, Chloe.

Actually, you tried. I'm not much of a trier.

- It's okay, Timmy. I'm a try-too-mucher.

We just need to find something

our parents have in common.

- Timmy, come inside!

We miss you!

- Chloe, come play a fun math game with Mommy.

- That's it!

The one thing our parents have in common

is that they love us.

- Which gives me a crazy idea.

- Oh, Timmy, you're trying.

I'm so proud.

- [grunts]

Did we win? - Yes!

Because the rhyming stopped.

- Wanda! Cosmo!

Our parents are fighting, so we want you

to poof into bears and drag us off

into the woods like you're gonna eat us.

- Because once our parents see we are in danger,

they will bond together in order to save us.

[playful music]

- You can count on us, guys.

You're still here, right?

Okay. My turn.

both: Ah!

[growling]

- Connie, what are you up to?

You've got the crazy eyes.

- Oh, I'm not Connie anymore.

I'm a vengeful warrior princess.

I'm gonna dip my sharpened stick into frog poison

and poke the Turners until they genuinely apologize

for their eco-unfriendly behavior,

and then after that, I'm gonna order a meat-lovers pizza,

because quite frankly, I've snapped!

- Conveniently passing outagain.

[groaning]

- This is the perfect place to be mauled by bears.

And here comes Cosmo and Wanda,

right on cue.

[growling]

- [gasps]

[growling]

[screaming]

Mommy! Daddy! Help!

I'm being mauled by a kockadoody bear!

- That's great acting.

Try waving your arms a bit.

- This is not Cosmo and Wanda.

They're real bears!

[dramatic music]

- Mommy, Daddy, help! Real Bears!

- I'll save you, kids.

Oh! Ah!

- Watch out, Mama Bear,

because the other Mama Bear is in the hizzouse!

And I've got a pointy stick!

- Hang on, Mrs. Claptrap!

We've got jet packs and a bear immobilizer.

They came with the premium package.

♪

all: Don't. Mess. With.

Our. Kids!

♪

[whimpering]

- Yes! My crazy idea worked!

- Thanks to our crazy parents.

[triumphant music]

- [crying] Those were real bears!

- [crying] I wasn't acting!

- I know, 'cause you're a terrible actress.

- ♪ Who wants a meat-lovers pizza? ♪

- [grumbling]

[swinging music]

♪

[donkey braying]

[dolphin clicking]

♪

- Best spring break ever.

And also the weirdest.

- I'm just glad we're not

with those little rhyming cookie kooks.

- I'm just happy I can see again.

Ah! Kettle corn!

[loud chomping]

all: They fought the bears and made amends,

and now they are the best of friends.

Ah! - Still old!

- The Easter Bunny!

♪

[wacky music]

♪

[jaunty music]

[lone knock] - Come in, Timmy!

- Hey, Chloe. Are you ready for--

- Dimmsdale Daze, the best carnival

in the whole wide world?

Yes! - Me too!

I can't wait to ride the Barf Dragon.

It's the world's sickest roller coaster.

Also, it makes you sick.

That's why I brought my own trusty barf bag.

- A barf bag? Wait, that's what I am?

- Uh, what am I, sport? The bag to hold your candy?

- The candy I've already eaten.

Because you're my backup barf bag!

- Ha ha, Wanda. I'm Timmy's favorite barf bag.

No, wait-- - Oh, Chloe!

[yelling like Tarzan]

- We've been making vines like

all the cool kids are doing these days.

- Okay, that's the wrong kind of, uh...

Never mind. Good try.

- Mommy, Daddy, I'm going to Dimmsdale Daze.

I'm gonna throw up on the Barf Dragon with Timmy.

- Well, doesn't that sound unproductive.

Sorry, but it's out of the question.

You see, carnivals are an offense to humanity

with their deep-fried garbage food,

shyster game booths, and worst of all,

scary carnies, who I am pretty darn sure do not recycle.

- Besides, your mother and I have already

made some fun family plans.

We're gonna chain ourselves to the old elm tree

in the town square so evil developers

can't cut it down.

That should make for a snazzy time, huh?

- Plus, a picture of us chained to the tree

will make an absolutely boffo Christmas card.

That we can recycle.

- But I want to go to Dimmsdale Daze.

- Well, when you're a parent, you can make your own decisions.

But we know what's best for you,

Chloe Jonas Salk Mandela Carmichael.

And that's chaining yourself to a tree.

- Ooh, just once I wish

I could be the parent so I could

do what I want and go to the carnival.

- Wish granted. You're a parent

for as long as Dimmsdale Daze is in town.

[triumphant trumpet music]

- I'm a parent! I'm in charge!

On the downside, I'm wearing mom jeans.

- And Cosmo and Wanda disappeared.

I'm out two barf bags.

- Hey Chloe, rocking those mom jeans.

Also, Cosmo and Wanda are gone

because by wishing to be an adult,

you are now too old to have fairies.

And since you and Timmy are on a fairy-share scenario,

he is squat out of luckas well!

Well, I'm off to get in line for the Barf Dragon.

You do not want to be on that ride late in the day.

- Timmy, I just thought of something.

If I'm a parent, then my parents must be my...

both: Mommy! Mommy!

- Mommy, Clark flushed my Sunday shoes down the toilet.

It was awesome.

- And Connie shaved off my eyebrows.

It was great.

- [laughing]

I'm not mad at your age-appropriate whimsy.

Because unlike my mom and dad,

I'm a fun parent.

- Your kids are my kind of people.

Dimmsdale Daze, here we come.

- [grunts] Ah!

- I got to say, Chloe, for your first time driving,

you're way worse than I thought you'd be.

both: Are we there yet? Are we there yet?

Are we there yet? - Soon, valued offspring.

[grunts] 'Cause I'm taking a shortcut.

I'm a parent, and I get to do what I want.

Yahoo!

[rock music]

We're there.

[children cheering]

[child barfing] - Did you hear that?

That's the sound of a kid

coughing up a deep-fried corn dog.

We must be near...

all: The Barf Dragon!

[all cheering]

- Sorry, ma'am. Front cars are for kids.

You got to ride in the back with the other creepy adults.

- Strap in, fellow creepy adult.

BT Dubs, way to rock those mom jeans.

Oh, this must be your first time in the dragon's caboose.

- What? Why did you say those words?

- 'Cause you don't have a barf shield.

Ha ha! [kids cheering]

Come at me, chunks!

[all cheering]

- Hey, guys. I don't stink anymore.

I got hosed down by the guy who washes the elephants.

all: Yay! - Yay!

I'm doing what I want 'cause I'm the parent.

I'm never going on the Barf Dragon again.

- Creepy adult alert!

Bounce her out!

- Ah!

- Wow, lady, you are a glutton for punishment.

- Ah!

Ah...

- Hey, Chloe, we bought one of everything

from the deep-fried everything booth.

I have no idea what I'm eating, but it's delicious.

- Clark and I ate pounds of cotton candy.

Can we have more? Please, please, please, please,

please, please, please, please, please?

- Yes. Fine. Here.

both: You're the best mom ever.

- Well, I've had a wonderful time at Dimmsdale Daze.

Although, a lot of people have thrown up on me,

and the elastic on my mom jeans is starting to pinch.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah, but it's time to check out

the most awesome attractionof all:

Carney Alley.

[scary laughter]

It's not an official attraction.

It's where all the cool carnies take their breaks.

You'll see things in Carney Alley you'll never forget,

even if you want to.

- But my mom, who's now my daughter,

says that carnies are scary.

- That's what makes them fun.

Last year, a guy named Lazy Eye Larry

paid me bucks to crawl through a doggy door

and get his ex-fiancé's engagement ring back.

- Can we go? Can we go to Carney Alley?

Please, please, please, please, please, please, please,

please, please, please?

- Fun parent, fun parent, fun parent.

Uh, you betcha? - Yes!

- I'd like to see Lazy Eye Larry again,

but word on the street is that he's working

a new ride called the Witness Protection Program.

[growling] - Ah!

[all screaming]

Was that a lizard or a man?

- Could have been both.

It's Carney Alley.

- Ah! I mean, whoopee!

Ha, said the fun mom.

But oh rats, we have to go home now

because we're all out of tickets.

[laughing] - Oh, Timmy!

I've got a gazillion tickets.

- No! No, no, no, no, no!

I mean, whoopee.

[all cheering]

- It's actually more than a gazillion.

It's a googolplex of tickets, which, like seven,

is a number too big for me to understand.

- Okay, I'll go on one more ride,

as long as it's not the Gravitwist.

- But the Gravitwist is fun.

- And we thought you were a fun mom.

- [sighs]

[all cheering]

I hope this is a short ride.

- It is, but no worries.

I gave the ride operate all my tickets,

so we're gonna get a googolplex of turns,

which is a long time in human years.

[playful carnival music]

[all cheering]

- [screaming]

♪

- Whoa, I think we went back in time there for a minute.

I saw Ben Franklin riding a dinosaur.

- I'm saying this as a fun mom.

I hated that ride!

Well, we're home.

Mommy's gonna sleep until this whole nightmare--

I mean, super fun experience--is over.

So night, night.

- Sleep-over! Sleep-over!

all: Sleep-over! Sleep-over!

Sleep-over! - Okay.

You guys can have a sleepover.

As long as you promise not to bother Mommy.

- Eh, but we're kids. We need parental guidance.

- I thought you were a creepy adult.

- But I have the mind of a child.

- It's true. He's been tested.

- Okay, I am the fun mom, so sleepover it is.

But "Sleepover" has the word "sleep" in it,

so go to sleep!

[crying]

[loud booming] Ah!

What did you do?

Ah!

- We made popcorn.

- A googolplex of it.

- Tell us a story, Fun Mom.

- But I'm so tired.

both: Sto-ry! Sto-ry! Sto-ry!

- Once upon a time!

There was a girl who wanted to be a parent

so she could do what she wanted to do.

She tried to be a fun mom,

but she got stuck in the dragon's caboose--

- This story's stupid! - Without a barf shield.

And she was dragged into Carney Alley

where she saw things she can never un-see.

The end! Nighty night!

- That was a scary story. - And stupid.

- Now we need a happy story so that we can go to sleep

and rest up for another fun-filled day

at Dimmsdale Daze.

all: Dimmsdale Daze! Dimmsdale Daze!

- No! No more Dimmsdale Daze

for you, you little monsters!

Not tomorrow, not ever!

You are monster children

with evil in your hearts.

- [sobbing]

- Monsters!

- Wow, that was some terrible parenting.

Who wants to play with knives?

both: Me!

[serene music]

[distant cheering] - [yawning]

Those kids have driven me nanners.

It sounds like Dimmsdale Daze is right outside my house.

Oh!

Ah! Ah!

[all cheering]

What in the name of Carney Alley

is going on here?

- Well you wouldn't let us go to Dimmsdale Daze,

so we brought Dimmsdale Dazeto us.

- But the only way you could do that is if you had...

- [whispering] [dinging]

- Fairies?

Ah!

- That's right, fairies.

- But--but wh-- - Why?

'Cause when you went all cuckoo cray-cray last night,

you acted like such a bad mom that your kids,

who are actually your parents,

qualified for fairies.

- And we were available.

- Actually, I was making a pretty penny.

crawling through doggy doors for Slippery Pete.

Formerly known as Lazy Eye Larry.

Yeah, he's not the best lookout in the world.

- They got fairies because of me?

- Yeah, you kind of stunk it up.

- I didn't want to be a mean mom.

I just wanted to go to Dimmsdale Daze.

Also, I'm gonna be sick.

Connie, Clark, I'm so sorry.

I never should have yelledat you

for engaging in age-appropriatewhimsy.

Being a parent is a lot harder than I thought.

I just wish I could be a kid again.

- I think we can make that happen.

[whispering]

[dinging]

- I'm a kid again!Whoopee!

- Good thing too, 'cause to be honest,

you did not rock those mom jeans.

- You know, Chloe, your father and I were talking.

Well, I was talking.

- And we remembered what it was like to be kids.

- Clark, I said I was talking. - Sorry.

- Anyhoo, we remembered what it was like

to be kids and, well, we decided

that you can go to Dimmsdale Daze.

- Really? Yay!

You're the most fun parents ever.

- Yeah, I wouldn't go overboard.

They're still gonna chain themselves to a tree.

- You should have some age-appropriate whimsy.

But there are a lot of germs at these carnivals,

so just step into this antibacterial bubble,

won't you?

- I'm so excited to be a kid again.

I feel so free.

And antiseptic.

- I'm just happy not to be a barf bag.

- This is awesome.

Let's go straight to Carney Alley.

- Six Fingers Jimmy's gonna give me a burner phone.

By the way, he doesn't have an extra finger.

Six is the total number of fingers on both hands.

- I got the ring! I got the ring!

Start the car, Lazy Eye Larry!

Larry?

[vibrant musical sting]

[jazzy music]

♪

- ♪ Billionfold

- Inc.

- Federator!