01x01 - Door-to-Door

[bunniefuu]

"DOOR-TO-DOOR"

Please, just a penny a day...

...can purchase enough milk...

...to feed a family of four for a week.

But only if you can help.
Please give as much as you can to the...

...desperate savage m*rder,
who would gouge out your eyes

and cut of your tongue
for satanic rituals. On the next - Jeraldo

What's that address again?

These guys jam.

Kick-ass.

Yeah, kick-ass.

That's pretty cool.

- He's standing on a butt.
- Yeah.

I like butts.

- Butts are cool.
- Yeah, I'm getting a stiffy.

b*ttcheeks.

Look at all those butts.

I'm pitching a tent.

Wow!

This is the 90s, people.
A 9 upside down is a 6.

So let's turn the 90s upside down
and we capture the spirit of the 60s, okay?

Watch those flashbacks dude.

Excuse me,
could I have your attention, please?

Okay, this week we're going to
learn a little bit about that spirit.

By giving off ourselves.

We're all going door to door
to collect for the consumer goods

- for overseas children poor.
- No way.

Of course, I can't force you
to work for charity,

thanks to our constitution's
delicate balance,

between our individual liberties
and a common good.

Nor would I want to, because of my
own beliefs in personal freedom.

So, anyone who dosen't want to collect,
can complete the 60's project

by doing a book report on
"The Electric Kool-Aid Acid Test".

- Oral, oral, oral.
- Yeah.

Written or oral.

- Yes.
- Cool.

But first, of course, you
got to read the book.

- That guy is touching his wiener.
- Yeah.

I'm gonna touch my wiener.

If you're like famous you can
touch your wiener and nobody cares.

- Is it that dude on a, uh, 9-2-0-1-0?
- Yeah.

- That show suck.
- Yeah.

- Those chicks are stocked up.
- Yeah.

Stock up my butt.

He think he knows
that everybody hates him.

Yeah.

What a wuss.

This video would be cool if they had,
like, chicks and tight pants everywhere.

Yeah.

- And lots of fire and explosions
- Yeah.

And car accidents.
Then it would be cool.

This video is stupid.
Change it.

What a dork!

He's talking about school.

Hey Beavis,
do you know how to read?

This guy is a dumbass.

- School sucks!
- Yeah!

- Yes
- Got any money?

We're collecting for the poor..

Great, I just lost my job.

What the hell... What do you...
What did you want?

We're collecting for the poor.

- Helping buy 'em meals and stuff.
- Meals?

There is one!

The 60's must have sucked..

Maybe in this house will be
a beautiful chick.

Hello? Collecting for charity.

Help the poor.

Come in, boys.
I've been waiting for you.

Now, turn on the lamp

- Once again boys, who do you serve?
- You, mistress Cora.

- Who is wrath do you fear
- Yours, mistress Cora

Yes, that Madonna book
was worth every penny.

Wow!

Erotica.

- That was cool.
- Yeah.

Erotica.

Gotta go, dude,
got to go spank my monkey.

Head.

-These guys are cool.
-Yeah.

Head.

People, I'm proud to announce that
we collected more than 8 dollars

- for our charity drive
- 8 dollars? Sad, dude.

Yeah.

But what makes me a specially proud

is this note I received from
Mrs. Cora anthr*x on Willow Place.

"When your charity work was explained
to me by those charming young men

Beavis and Butt-Head

my heart went out to those
poor children overseas."

"Good luck, and please send Beavis
and Butt-head around if you need more."

And students it's a
check for 100 dollars.

I'm proud of your guys.

And here is your price for collecting the
most money in our spirit of the 60's drive

A "Moby Grape" Album for each of you

You know, it hurts me to part with
these, guys. They are collectors items

But giving till it hurts is
part of the 60's were all about

Nice catch, dude.

Watch this! Behind the back.

Damn!

What happen if you stuck a
firecracker in that little hole?

That would be cool

Hey, look, old dude.

- This guy is a dumbass
- Yeah, he looks like a David Letterman

Trick photography

That's pretty cool.

Wow.

- Storms are cool.
- Yeah.

Wow, that's pretty cool.

Wind is cool.

Here pony.

That's cool.

Hurricanes are cool.

I like when the wind not
stuck over.

- Lands on people
- Yeah, cares a roadblock