Peri! Peri!
You're wasting your time, you know.
That door can
withstand pressures
of up to ten thousand
kilos per square
- centimetre. I'm...
- Please. Another time.
I'm very concerned about my friend.
Would you mind
opening the door?
- She might need my help.
- That is unlikely.
I estimate that she has a thirty-four
thousand six hundred and thirty
to one chance of
surviving such a fall.
That's pretty low, you know.
Can't you check? Don't you have
sensors in the ventilator shaft?
She won't be in the shaft.
She'll have
fallen through to
the level below.
Look. I don't wish to
depress you unduly,
but the chance of
your friend having
made a soft landing
is somewhere in the
region of eight
million and three to one.
Now that's pretty
unlikely, you must agree.
I'm awfully sorry.
I hope I didn't hurt you.
Are you in the habit of dropping out
of ventilator shafts, miss?
Of course not!
It was an accident!
- Are you all right?
- Just...just a little winded.
Now now, lad. I think you should seek
a medical opinion
before committing
yourself in matters
- you're unfamiliar with.
- I feel fine, sir.
He looks fine to me.
Are you qualified to
hold such an opinion?
Well, I'm not a doctor
if that's what you mean.
Then one can safely say that your opinion
is uninformed
- and purely speculative.
- Wait a minute.
I know where there is a doctor.
He could examine your friend.
- Is that a fact, miss?
- He's at the top of the ventilation shaft.
- Well, how convenient, eh Snatch?
- Indeed, sir.
- Now what have I said?
- It's more what you've implied, miss.
- Really?
- Malpractice.
Putting on a little weight, aren't we sir?
Too many Vogel bars between
meals I should think.
Grant doesn't get fat.
He's young, sir.
And as a junior officer,
his relative lack of responsibility
still allows him
time to go to the gym.
On the other hand, sir,
he doesn't eat fifteen
meals a day either.
- Grant doesn't like me.
- Oh I wouldn't say that, sir.
If there is a certain
lack of warmth in his attitude
I would think it's
because he stands in awe of you, sir.
Why doesn't anyone like me?
You have no need of it, sir.
You have what every
captain desires.
Your crew's deep,
unquestioning respect.
But I want both!
- Hmm?
- I don't believe we're
having this conversation!
Put yourself in
our position, miss.
We just happen to be strolling along,
when you fall
on my colleague here.
It then transpires that you
have a doctor friend
lurking in the
shadows only too eager to offer
- his services.
- I don't believe it.
Do you know how far I fell?
I could have been k*lled!
An occupational hazard.
Oh, look, you guys.
You've got to believe me.
I was wandering around on
the level above.
It was dark, and I
fell into the ventilation shaft!
Personally, miss,
I would like to believe you.
Come and talk to the Doctor.
He'll confirm that I'm telling the truth.
We have every intention
of questioning that particular gentleman
Uh, perhaps you wouldn't mind
clipping this to your jacket.
- What for?
- There are electronic eyes and ears everywhere.
That little device
inhibits their efficiency.
Who are you guys?
Even if I were permitted to tell
you, miss,
I don't think you're qualified to know.
Hello?
Hello? Is anyone there?
I hope you aren't gonna
give me a hard time.
- Me? Good heavens no.
- Well, if it's any comfort,
your friend is quite safe.
Although how she managed
to survive such a fall
I shall never know.
- Where is she?
- All in good time.
- Oh come on now!
- You said you weren't gonna
give me a hard time!
As if I would.
Or could, come to that.
- You really are quite nice.
- Hum?
In many ways, I'm
sad you are a prisoner.
You're the most agreeable person
I've spoken to all day.
Oh!
There we are, sir.
Now if you wouldn't mind turning over....
- Hmmm...
- Have they found the Earth woman yet?
- I wouldn't know, sir.
- Computer!
I'm right here, Captain.
Your pleasure is my pleasure.
What news of
the female intruder?
Everything's under control, sir.
- Thenwhy isn't she here?
- The service ducting area is very large
and the search party have little
sense of direction.
I want the female intruder
here as quickly as possible.
Your wish is my command.
While you're pumping into my cabin?
Ancient Earth music.
I thought it might help the
prisoner relax whilst
you're interrogating her.
Shut it off!
I find it offensive.
I was quite enjoying it.
SHUT IT OFF!
You see what I have to put up with.
I do, sir.
You just lie
back and let me
massage all those
little stresses and
strains away.
Massage my chins, will you?
I always find that very relaxing.
Computer? Computer?
Where are you?
Hello there...
- Where were you?
- To be honest, hiding.
I don't think I can
take anyone else shouting at me.
- What's happened?
- Everything is going wrong!
- The captain keeps telling me off!
- Well, take no notice.
He shouts at everyone.
I don't think I can take any more!
I have this terrible confusion
at the heart of my logic circuits!
To be perfectly honest, Mister Grant,
I think I'm becoming schizoid!
- Do you mind if we get back to business?
- That's what I'm here for...
Have you diverted the search party yet?
That's about all I have managed to do.
Then give me the location of
the intruder and
I'll go down and make the arrest.
I can't find her anywhere!
She's disappeared!
Has she? Then give me her
last location.
I'll go and look for her myself.
Just let me check
The Earth woman is still alive.
I somehow thought
you'd turn up.
- You have failed me.
- Opening the ventilation
shaft was the best
I could do at such short notice.
Give Grant the
information he wants.
He can do our work for us.
When he finds the
woman, the maston can k*ll them both.
Hello? It's me again.
I've been waiting for hours.
- Forty-four minutes, precisely.
- Oh...
Now you said that you wouldn't
give me a hard time.
It's cold and dark in here.
And I was getting very lonely.
Not for much longer.
Let me introduce
you to service maintenance drone
- nine three four.
- How do you do, sir?
My former master used to call me Barton.
If it so pleases, you may do the same, sir.
Well, it's certainly
less formal than nine three four.
Decidedly so, sir. Now, if
you wouldn't mind stepping this way, sir.
Ah. May I ask where
you're taking me?
I'm afraid it's necessary
to descend one level.
Would you prefer to use
the lift or the stairs, sir?
- Hold it!
- Who's that?
- Is Grant, sir.
- Raise your hands!
- I'd better make a run for it.
- Oh, I wouldn't do that, sir.
Mister Grant is an excellent sh*t.
- I said raise your hands!
- How do you do?
I'm the Doctor.
On this ship we
sh**t stowaways!!
I think you'd better withdraw
behind me, sir.
I should prove adequate cover.
Stay where you are!
- Are you armed?
- Yes, sir.
But, unfortunately,
the power pack
fitted to my g*n is exhausted.
Drone, move out of the way!
Well, how long before he r
ealises you can't fire back
Very soon, sir.
Mister Grant is a
particularly bright
young man, and
tends to notice small details.
MOVE.
- Are you all right?
- Not really, sir.
The servo-backup
drive to my lower
limbs has been damaged.
I really do think it's the
end of us both, sir