01x13 - Last Christmas

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Doctor Who Extra". Aired: 23 August 2014 –; 27 December 2017.
Adventures in time and space on the Red Button.
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01x13 - Last Christmas

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Hello, all Doctor Who fans all over the world.

I'm wishing you a very merry Christmas and a fantastic 2015.

You're Father Christmas.

You're real.

'This year's Christmas special has come and gone, 'but you've not had your fill of Doctor Who just yet.

'We're going to give you something extra.

' Do you really believe in Santa Claus?

'Coming up, we have a funny Father Christmas' Father Christmas has, at long last, entered the TARDIS.

Sweet Papa Crimbo.

Doctor Who and Santa Claus in one programme.

Pretty amazing.'..

Elves with attitude' Shut your mouth, wise

-guy, or you get yours.'..

And creepy creatures.

' Here they come.

It's got a really great mixture of scares and hopefully funnies as well.

'This is a very merry Doctor Who Extra.

' It's Christmas Day.

Merry Christmas.

'The 2014 Christmas special started with a crash 'and The Doctor was once again back in Clara's life.

'But this time, she has to make room for another festive fella.

' Sir, we've been seen.



Hello The Doctor Who Christmas special.

It's always a treat, isn't it?

It features Santa Claus, played hilariously by Nick Frost, who is brilliant.

Nothing to worry about.

Carry on.

Merry Christmas.

Let it be said, does he not have the perfect name?

Nicholas Frost.

That is, you know, St Nick, Nicholas Frost.

No, I mean, it's perfect! He's actually called Santa Claus.

You're Father Christmas.

You're real.

Of course, I'm real!! How can he not be real?

He's kind of got this dual, this dual thing going on between Father Christmas being your everyday kind of guy down the pub and going into the character of being Father Christmas as well.

How do you think those presents get under the tree every year?

By magic?

It was important that I didn't play him like a jolly, you know, red

-faced He looks like Santa Claus, but he's kind of a bit edgy and I wanted to play him a bit angry and he's kind of cross that no

-one listens to him or understands that he is real, you know.

Beardy Weirdy, how do you get all the presents in the sleigh?

Bigger on the inside.

It is actually Santa Claus.

It's not a robot Santa Claus, it's not an alien who's adopted the persona of Santa Claus.

It is actually the real Santa Claus in the North Pole.

63, take two.


It's Christmas Eve.

Yeah, you don't have to tell me that.

Then why aren't you out delivering presents?

Technically, I am.

No, you're not, cos you're stood right there.

He made me laugh in the middle of a scene, actually, yesterday and we were all laughing quite a lot.

It was quite a hard day yesterday, because he's just so funny! How does a note thrown up a chimney get to the North Pole?

How does an e

-mail get into your computer?

I don't know.

It goes into some sort of cloud or something.

- Same thing.

- Right.

You know we're standing under the base mistletoe.

Cut! Can't really argue with Nick.

He's spot

-on, yeah.

Let's do one more.


Terrific! 'The Doctor and Clara find themselves in a mysterious dream world 'which all came from the mind of show

-runner Steven Moffat.

' One creepy thing that I've always been slightly obsessed with has been the dream that keeps going once you've woken up.

"I've had that quite a few times in the morning and I think," "I don't want to get up", then I get up and I get dressed and think, "Well, finally, I've done it", then I wake up again and I think, "No!" How am I supposed to tell if I'm actually awake in those early hours?

So I wanted to do something about that.

And have you ever woken from a dream and discovered that you're still dreaming?

Dreams within dreams.

It's a really complicated episode of dreams within dreams within dreams and are we dreaming and are we really here?

We are dealing with creatures who have w*apon our dreams against us.

I don't know about anybody else, but I'm pretty certain I'm awake right now.

We've never done dreams.

Well, we've done Amy's Choice, I suppose, was dreams, but actual, proper, fighting your way out of dreams.

Trying to work out what's not right and what's good.

They're battling to get out and they kind of, in their shared consciousness, activate Santa Claus to come in and help them.

Action! You seen them before, Doctor?

I've heard of them.

The Kantrofarri.

Colloquially known as the Dream Crabs.


Depending on how many of those are already on Earth, humanity may have seen its last day.

So, are we going to stand around arguing about whether or not I'm real or are we going to get busy saving Christmas?

Santa goes badass! He's giving me the feels.

Silence! Both of you.

'To fight their way out of the dream state, they had to 'take on the Dream Crabs, which are a force to be reckoned with.

'The show's producers wanted to turn dreams into nightmares, 'so they gave us some rather creepy creepy


' Here they come.

The Dream Crabs who kind of, like, crawl onto your face with their claws behind you and like a straw, suck into your brain and make you dream everything that you've ever wished for.

The Dream Crab induces a dream state.

Keeps you happy and relaxed in a perfectly realised dream world as you dissolve.

The Dream Crabs.

It makes them sound so, you know, like lovely little beings, but they are absolutely disgusting.

Action! Why is it called a Dream Crab, for a start?


Because it generates a telepathic field?


Alters perception?


I seem to be doing all the work here.

Meaning that we can't trust anything that we see or hear.

I've loved all the special effects and the way people's minds work to make this thing come alive is just incredible to see.

You know, we've got one that moves and some that don't move.

The work that's gone into creating them is the first thing that I just go, "" you know, and really applaud everyone involved with that.

Now! And those poor guys that had to wear the masks, you know, and walking

- they couldn't see a thing, you know.

And that's quite a scary thing to do, isn't it?

To have to move around and have faith that the person who's guiding you is not going to walk you into a wall.

Cut! 'This year's Christmas special features an actor who makes 'a regular appearance on the show.

'You may not recognise his face, but you may recognise his voice.

' I cannot see the tactical advantage in letting your enemies know that you'll be arriving early, with this early warning system.

However, yes, I suppose, it's camouflage.

Not bad, you could blend into a forest background.

Dan is fantastic to see.

He usually plays Strax.

Elfie Longstockings.

It's hilarious to have him, to see him play an elf and doing it absolutely beautifully.

Dan, of course, is a mainstay of Doctor Who.

He plays the wildly popular Strax.

Well done, Straxy, you've still got it, buddy.

Sir, please do not noogie me during combat prep.

But we've always sort of vaguely said we should get him in with his own face, just so once, we've had his own face on Doctor Who.

Well observed, sir.

I guess after a good seven years of being inside a rubber suit on Doctor Who, inside a mask, it's Yeah, it's refreshing to actually have my own face on screen.

Working out what I do with my own face is quite interesting as well, because inside Strax, I can't really hear very well, whereas with this, because I can hear people and respond to them in kind of a normal way as I would do as an actor normally, there's a lot more It's a completely open playing field.

Your mum and dad, one night a year, for no particular reason, just out of the blue, suddenly decide to give you a great big pile of presents.


What, because they love you so much?

! And pairing him with Nathan just makes them a couple of elves with attitude.

- Innit sweet?

- It's a lovely story, dear.

Yeah, but it's time to start living in the real world, yeah?

My character is one of Santa's right

-hand men called The Wolf.

Get that in.

The Wolf.

Pretty cool name, an elf.

Ears give it away, not that the costume doesn't.

Straight from the workshop and end up in the dream world of, I guess, the rest of the cast.



A dream.

And the elves are just a bit, you know, they want to be taken seriously.

They may be small and have comedy outfits and pointy ears, but, you know, they've got attitude.

Shut your mouth, wise

-guy, or you get yours.

It's very lucky for me, as well.

I'm feeling extra smug, cos this is a hat

-trick for me.

This is my third Christmas special in a row.

I had The Snowmen, where I was Strax Sir.

I am opposed to your current apathy.

Thank you, Strax.

And we had last year with The Time Of The Doctor where I was two separate Sontarans talking to each other in front of a green screen for a little bit.

Our invisibility cloak is compromised.

What's wrong with it?

I don't know.

I can't see it.

Well, looks invisible to me.

And now, third one in a row, so I really can't b*at the whole thing of being on Christmas Day, watching myself on television.

That's going to be fantastic! 'Among the cast on the polar expedition is an actor who has 'followed in his father's footsteps onto the Doctor Who set

- 'actor Michael Troughton, son of second Doctor, Patrick Troughton.

' But it's me.

Don't get too close.


Because this is a nightmare! Argh! When Michael Troughton, of course, was on set, I just kept texting Capaldi and saying, "Are you asking him questions?

"Are you getting the inside info?

" And he was saying, he text me back saying, "He was on set for Evil of the Daleks", and I'd say, "" I remember two distinct visits to the studio when Dad was doing it.

One with the Emperor Dalek, The Evil of the Daleks, that's what it was, and also the one with the Yeti, Web of Fear.

And I remember going to that distinctly.

Seeing that set, it was absolutely stunning.

Remembering that and then walking onto this set, you know, it was sort of Yeah, it was quite emotional actually.

Fun, but quite emotional.

'At the end of the episode, The Doctor got to fly something other 'than the TARDIS and returned everyone back to reality.

' Do you want a go?

Yeah, all right.

I love the idea of The Doctor flying Santa's sleigh.

Look at me! Look! Look at me! We have got the main Santa sleigh on this rig here.

By just simply moving a lever, means that the sleigh is, kind of, moving forward, backward, left and right, and in addition to that, we've got snow, we've got lots of wind.

So, yeah, he's going to have a bit of a rollercoaster ride for the rest of this afternoon.

'It's been a rollercoaster of a Christmas special, 'but what does the next series have in store?

' We've got three scripts in.

Other scripts are being written right now.

I know what the arc is, I know where we're going.

I know what's going to happen in the big terms, in broad terms throughout the show, and it's feeling very exciting.

I can't wait for Christmas And the lights on the Christmas tree Yeah, Rudolph knows with his big, red nose He's keeping Santa company I can't wait for Christmas Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to Doctor Who fans and to everyone, everywhere.
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