08x22 - Raging Bull*&@!

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Wings". Aired: April 19, 1990, to May 21, 1997.*
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Two brothers, Joe and Brian Hackett, run a one-plane commuter service from a small Nantucket airport.
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08x22 - Raging Bull*&@!

Post by bunniefuu »

(violin music playing)

JOE:
This is it--

the moment of truth.

You've trained hard.

You're in great shape.

You're ready.

Jab!

Jab!

Right cross!

You're tough.

You're strong.

You're better than he is.

And he is going to pay--

pay for all he's done to you.

k*ll.

k*ll!

k*ll!

(bell dings, crowd shouting)

Oh, God,
how did I get into this?

You mind if I have
some of your fries?

Yes, I do.

You going to eat that pickle?

Yes, I am.

This is nice...

us having lunch together.

When can we do it again?

Well, let's see...

is never good for you?

Brian, you're so funny.

Can I have a swig of your drink?

That pickle's coming up.

Hey, Brian, you'll
never guess

what I did today
down at the gym.

You finally
got up the nerve

to undress in front
of the other boys?

Uh... no, I still prefer to wait
till the coast is clear.

Uh, but I
did sign up

for a boxing
tournament

and guess who
I'm fighting?

Remember that guy Mac O'Malley
Oh!

who tormented me
throughout the fourth grade?

Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Wasn't he the guy that stuffed
you into the gym locker

and then poured water
from the toilet on you

through the air vent?

No, that was you.

Oh, yeah. Right.

Right, right.

Toilet water--

that was my trademark.

Look, you
still weren't

as bad as O'Malley.

That guy made my life
a living hell

and now it is payback time.

What I wouldn't give
to get back at the person

who tormented me
through all my school years.

Then again, could I really belt
my own mother?

Hey, wasn't Mac the guy
who gave you that nickname?

Don't say it.

Oh, come on,
come on, what is it?

Don't say it.

Why not?

Nicknames are a sign
that people like you.

When I was growing up,

my friends gave me
lots of them:

Uh, the mooch...

the maggot...

the peeper.

I swear...

you know, when
you're young,

you think those days
will last forever.

Oh, hey, Casey,
remember Mac O'Malley?

What did he say about me?

He's lying! I was never
in the back of that car.

That never happened!

Both times.

I remember, I remember he gave
you a nickname, too, didn't he?

Don't say it.

Easy, Casey.

I told you not to say it!

Oh, hey, Helen,
guess whose name I drew

in the boxing
tournament?

Mac O'Malley.

I remember him.

Didn't he give you
that nickname...?

Don't say it.

Didn't he give you
that nickname...?

Don't say it.

Oh, please, Casey.

I wouldn't
embarrass you.

I remember the
nickname he gave me:

Easy Casey's fat sister.

When's the big fight?

Saturday night--
don't miss it.

It should be a good one.
Helen, I can't believe

you're not trying to stop this.

I mean, I can't even bear
the thought of boxing.

It's so barbaric.

I think it's
kind of hot.

Two big, strong,
half-naked guys

strutting their stuff
around the ring.

You think it's kind
of sexy, don't you?

Yeah. Oh, no, no, no, no.

No sex until
after the fight.

Got to keep your edge.

No sex at all?

That's right.

That means no
shadowboxing either.

So, Hackett,
I hear you're going

to be strapping
on the gloves

for a little fisticuffs
this weekend.

You got that
right, Roy.
So how you feeling?

You think
he's got a chance?

I may want to make
a little wager.

Oh, I can't believe this.

You mean people
can actually bet on this?

Wake up, sugarplum.

People bet on everything
on this island.

Like, for instance,
every Christmas Scarpacci

doesn't hang himself,
I lose dough.

Okay, Roy, put me down
for 20 bucks on Joe.

You are going to whip
this guy, aren't you?

Oh, you know it.

Make it ten.

Okay, step and jab.

Step and jab.
Step and jab.

I got six
underneath.

Come after me, now.

Lead with the left.
Lead with the left.

Ow! Ow! Ow!

See? See that?

Man, you left
yourself wide open.

You do that Saturday,

you're going to be
kissing canvas, pally.

Well, we'll just
have to make sure

there's not a desk
in the ring, now, won't we?

All right, Joey.

I've taken you as far
as I can physically,

but... I don't know if
you're ready... here--

in the head...

where it counts.

See, I don't know
if you're ready

to k*ll this guy.

Aah! Okay!

Getting ready...
getting ready...

readier... readier!

Ready! Ready!

That's what
I thought.

Yeah, but just remember
to keep those hands up.

'Cause you're a sucker
for a left.

Hey, Joe.
Hey.

All right, Brian,
how we doing?

Doing great, doing great.

Working hard,
getting into shape.

Yeah, but how
we doing here...

in the head...
where it counts?

That's just what
we're trying to find out.

Stop poking me.

I'm really getting
a headache.

Listen. I just spoke to a guy
down at the gym.

That guy O'Malley,
that you were supposed to fight?

He just dropped out.

Aw. Well, he must
have gone yellow

when he found out
how hard I've been training.

No, not exactly.

When he heard
you were his opponent,

he laughed so hard
he threw his back out.

Oh, great.

Well, now who am I supposed

to unleash these
fists of fury on?

Oh, don't worry.

They found you a replacement.

Ha! I pity the fool.

Who is it?

It's him.

Me?!

Brian's
the fool?

Well, that's impossible

'cause you didn't sign up
for the tournament.

Well, actually, I did,
as an alternate, you know,

in case somebody got sick
or chickened out--

you know, like you.

Great. Now who am I going to bet
on in this cream puff derby--

cream or puff?

Well, that's that.

It would be crazy

to see you two
in the ring.

Ridiculous.

Yeah, it's nuts.

I'll just have
to call the gym and cancel it.

Yeah, man, if I were you,
I'd bail, too.

Excuse me?

Well, I mean,
you and me in a fight?

It's no contest.

Yeah, you got
that right.

When we were kids,
I kicked the snot
out of you.

Yes, that's
when we were kids,

but we're adults now,
and I've been training you.

I know all your weaknesses--

a left, a right,
a desk, a finger.

So, what are
you saying, Brian?

You think you
can take me?

I'm willing to find out.

Okay, that's enough, guys.

Joe, you're not going
to fight your own brother.

I think you better
listen to wifey here.

She's just trying
to protect you.

Your call, puff.

May the best man win.

Oh, brother, this
ought to be good.

You two bruisers in the ring.

Oh, I can see the headline now:

"The Thrilla in Vanilla."

Faster.

Come on, faster.

You're jumping like
a little girlie-girl.

Now... wait.

The little girlie-girl
needs to take a break.

Oh, okay, fine.

You get your beauty rest.

Mmm. What's that smell?

Could that be
the scent of a loser?

So, Hackett,

is this the best
you could do

for a trainer?

He's lucky to have me.

No one brings out the
k*ller instinct like I do.

My mere existence drove
my parents to blows.

He's a madman.

Never stops pushing.

(with Italian accent):
"Hey, Brian, train harder.

"Brian,

you're such a weenie."

This morning he woke me up
at 4:00 a.m.

to jog 20 miles
alongside his cab.

It's paying off,
isn't it?

Yeah, for you.

You kept the meter running.

What are you doing?

I didn't work this hard

to watch you throw it away
on junk food.

Don't make me hurt you.

You see?

It's a natural talent.

Hey, where you going?

Where you going?
Where you going?

Excuse me,

but this little girlie-girl
has to go make a pee-pee!

Listen.

Hackett, come here.

Now listen...

I'd hate to see that
pretty face of yours

get all messed up.

Now, I know a way
out of this

where nobody gets hurt...

and we all come out ahead.

You know what I mean?

Wait. What are you saying
to me, Roy?

You want me to take a dive?

Oh, Hackett, please.

"Dive" is such an
ugly way to put it.

I want you to roll over
like a ten-dollar hooker.

Roy, that's...

that's too low
even for you.

What g*ons put you
up to this?

Nantucket Hair and Nails.

(gasps)

I might have known--
Cynthia and Shirley.

They destroy everything good
on this island.

Okay. All right.

Okay, Helen.

I made it.

That's it, I'm done.

Well, I'm not.
Take another lap.

I still want to finish reading,

"Ten Kitchen Utensils to Help
Spice Up Your Love Life."

Speaking of which...

Now, you know the rules--

no sex until after the fight.

You know, you got
a real mean streak.

You call yourself
a trainer.

Sure, I work
Brian pretty hard.

You never see me
withholding sex.

That didn't
come out right.

(groans)

Hey. Brian,
looking good.

Feeling good.

Have you
had lunch yet?

Don't answer.
Don't answer.

He's trying to get
in your head.

Hey. Hey, look...

he doesn't need any cheap
psych-out tricks

to get an edge.

He's got desire.

Yes, I do.

You know, he's
going to win

because he's better coached,

he's better conditioned
and he's got better moves.

Don't listen to her;
don't let her in;

don't let him in;
don't let her in.

Don't you worry
about me.

Nothing's getting
in here.

You'll have to
excuse my boy.

He's had a rough day.

He almost k*lled a guy
in the ring this morning.

Oh, yeah? What'd the guy do,

see him in his trunks
and die laughing?

You watch it, lady.

Who you calling a lady?

Okay, hey,
hey, hey, hey.

Look, now, nobody's
calling anybody a lady.

You guys are taking this
way too seriously.

We just want to have
some fun, that's all.

That's right, just a little
friendly competition.

That's all.

Your boy's going down.

Oh, yeah, well, you
better watch yourself.

ANTONIO:
You watch yourself.

So, sluggo, you ready
for tomorrow night?

Don't I look ready, huh?

Oh!
Oh!

Well, physically, yeah,
but who knows

if you're ready here in
the head, where it counts!

Hey, knock it off, man.

How'd you like it
if somebody did that to you?

Oh, no.

What?

The I.R.S. never received

Sandpiper's quarterly
corporate tax,

and, uh, now
they're hitting us

with a big penalty.

Brian, why didn't
you send this in?

Me? Was I supposed to?

Yes, you were supposed to.

I'm sorry. I don't remember
you asking me to do it.

That's 'cause
you don't listen.

Look, when you screw up
your own life, fine,
that's your business.

But when you screw up
with Sandpiper,

that's my business,
and I'm sick of it.
Okay, okay,

okay, okay.
I'm sorry, all right?

I don't know what else to say.

I forgot.
Oh, well, great,

that's what I'll
tell the I.R.S.

You forgot.

Hello.

Fay's back.

With fish!

It just don't get
more inviting than that.

Uh, listen, Fay, uh...

I'm sorry to spring this
on you on your day off,

but Brian screwed up
our tax payment,

and you're going to have to get
on the phone right away

and straighten it out.

Oh, that. No, no, no, no.

That wasn't Brian's fault;
that was mine,

but don't worry, I straightened
it all out with the I.R.S.

And now if you'll excuse me,
this is still my day off

and I intend to enjoy it
to the hilt.

I've got 30 pounds
of flounder to gut.

Okay, Brian, I'm sorry.

Oh.

That's it?

That's all I get, huh?

Uh, yeah.

I mean, I said I'm sorry.

What do you want,
a certificate?

No, but I think I deserve
a better apology than that

for you reaming me up and down.

Well, I mean, hey, can
you really blame me?

I mean, look at
your track record.

You screw up all the time.

You know what?
I don't screw up

nearly as much
as you make me think I do.

Okay?
Oh, I don't know
about that.

Man, you got me so brainwashed
that I believe I screwed this up

and that really
ticks me off.
Hey, hey, hey.

First of all, keep
your hands off me,

and if you want to
talk about ticked off,

let's talk about all the
years that I bailed you out,

one thing after another.
Oh, here we go.
That's right.

No, no, and you never
let me forget it, do you?

You're so used to
saying it, that you say it
even when it's not true.

You know that?
Let's wait five minutes,
and it will be true.

Hey, man, don't do
that to me.
Hey! What are you
shoving me for?

Hey, do you want
to start...
You want to settle
this right now?

I'll do it right now.
Joe. Brian. Brian!

I would like to wipe that
smirk right off your face.
No...

Listen, pal, you're going to get
your chance tomorrow, huh?

You'll get your chance
to hit me. One chance.

No, no, there's going to be
two hits tomorrow night--

me hitting you and
you hitting the floor.
No, Joe...

Yeah, save your strength, pal--
you're gonna need it to get up.

What just happened?

What happened
to the friendly competition?

It just got unfriendly.

ANTONIO:
Okay, okay, this is it--

the moment
we've worked so hard for.

All my blood,
all my sweat, all my tears...

What the hell are
you talking about?

All you did was drive
the cab and annoy me.
Yes.

Yes, but I annoyed you
into a fighting machine.

There's only one thing
still worries me--

are you ready here,
in the head, where it counts?

Okay, you're ready.
You're ready.

So...
how do you like it?

You haven't said
anything.

Well, I don't know
what to tell you.

I don't really get it.

"Sugar Ray Sheraton"?

I don't know whether
to knock Joe out

or bring him
room service.

It's the best I could do.

My first choice
was "Kid Holiday Inn."

But...

they caught me digging
through the laundry basket.

Hackett.

Hackett,
h-how you doing?

Are you up
for this? Huh?

You have no idea.

Good, good,
good, good, good,

because I bet the farm on you.

Now, not to put any pressure
on you, Hackett,

but if you lose,
Mom goes off a few machines.

I'm surprised you showed up.

What's the matter?

You thought I'd screw up
again and forget, huh?

No, I didn't think
you had the guts.
Oh, yeah?

We'll see in a few
minutes who's got what.

Why wait till we get
in the ring? I'll take
you out right now.

Let's go, man.
Let's go right now.

Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Now, come on.

Save it
for the opening bell.

All right,
all right.

See you in the
ring... Cindy.

Oh, that... that was

his nickname?

Cindy?

I told you never to say that.

It must have
slipped out.

Hey.

Hey, Helen, oh,
finally you made it.

I thought you'd
miss the slaughter.

Slaugh...? Do you hear
yourself, Joe?

Don't go through
with this.

Look, it's way too
late for that.

This has been a
long time coming.

Joe, this is not
boxing anymore.

This is revenge.

Yeah, you're damn right.

If you go into that ring,

you're going to ruin
your relationship
with Brian forever.

What relationship?

Will the fighters for the next
bout please enter the ring.

Please, Joe.

Now, listen to me,
Joe... Joe...

(bell dings)

Will the fighters come
to the center of the ring?

Okay, stare him down.

Don't blink.
Look right through him.

Shut up.
Yes, sir.

All right, you boys,
you know the rules.

Let's have a good, clean fight.

Obey my commands at all times.

Are you done?

Okay, trash talk.

You...

(muffled shouting)
are one ugly...

Huh? What?

Spit.

Now trash talk.

You are one ugly

little fella.

Oh, yeah?
Well, you...

you're a...
you're a big idiot.

That's the worst trash talk
I ever heard.

Now, go to your corners
and come out fighting!

Joe, Joe...

Brian, Brian...

you guys listen to me.

You're more than just brothers.

You guys are best friends.

I mean, think of everything that
you've meant to each other.

Please don't do this.

Hey! Get her
out of here.

Okay. I'm leaving.

That's it.

Wimpy women trainers.

Just be thankful you got
a real man in your corner.

Oh! Kind of a cramp.

(bell dings)

(crowd shouting)

HELEN:
Think about all you've meant
to each other.

YOUNG BRIAN:
Hey, Joey, I did it.

Thanks for teaching me
how to ride a two-wheeler.

Maybe tomorrow, uh,
you could teach me how to stop?

HELEN:
You're not just brothers.

You're best friends!

Don't cry, Brian.

You don't have to worry

about those monsters
in your closet anymore.

Not after me and "cappy"
took care of 'em.

YOUNG BRIAN:
Joe! Wait till you see

what I found under Dad's bed!

Ay-yi-yi!

Here, Bri.

I want you to have my old glove.

But you got to promise me
you'll oil it,

and keep it in a dry place,

where the temperature
never drops

below 40 degrees Fahrenheit.

Oh, really?

You want me to be your best man?

Well, what can I say, Joey?

Uh... I'd be honored.

JOE:
To Sandpiper.

Making you my partner
was the best move I ever made.

Oh, for God's sake,
somebody hit somebody!

(crowd jeering)

I love you, man!

I love you, too!

What are you
wimps doing?!

(crowd cheering)
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