02x02 - Fabrice Luchini

[bunniefuu]

It's crazy, it all happened so fast!

To a man of his means,

buying this agency is like

buying a Playmobil castle.

I don't suppose he'll play with it much,

living in London.

Andréa?

There it is.

Mr. Janowski. You are now

majority shareholder of ASK,
with a 60% stake. Congratulations.

Thank you.

Thank you.

So...

When I was a kid, I
dreamed of being an actor.

Yes!

I wanted to be a star but...

I was like you, Marteau,
living in a backwater,

stony broke... So today,

I'm glad to have found
you. The actors are here...

and they're mine.

I'm joking.

You look after the
actors, it isn't my field.

Just to say

I'm happy and excited to be here.

Here's to you.

- Cheers.
- Cheers.

Your real name is Marteau?

No, it's just a bullshit nickname.

Marteau is nice. Sounds
like a woman of the earth.

Here, my name is Martel.

Okay? This isn't school.

Okay, no problem.

I don't want to ruin our honeymoon,

Andréa Martel.

Cheers.

Like this?

That's it, thanks.

What's this about Ramzy

and Virginie Efira leaving?

Well, actors are very...

- Fragile.
- Yes.

Capricious, easily influenced.

That's why agents don't have kids,

they've got plenty already!

They were your clients, Mathias?

Yes.

I always use first
names with colleagues.

Fine, Mr. Janowski.

They had a break-up,

François Bréhier seized the moment.

- Who?
- He owns StarMedia.

He was making a move to buy us.

We threatened him, he got his revenge.

Threatened him how?

We had info.

Some dubious investments
he made for elderly actors,

a long time ago.

On a practical level,
we sabotaged the plumbing

and flooded their offices with sh*t.

On a practical level, why
don't we do what they do?

They stole our actors,

so let's take their biggest
star: Fabrice Luchini.

You can't ask us to steal a client.

Why not? They did.

That's not how it works.

Luchini has been with
Bréhier for 35 years.

He'll never leave.

We'll wait for Bréhier to screw up,

then make a move.

Right...

so who is this bunch of wussies?

Either we send a clear
message to our rivals

or everyone will help
themselves to our stars.

Hicham, you said you'd
let us do our job.

Yes, but I could sell
my shares to StarMedia.

Don't make me regret backing you.

I want Luchini at ASK
by the end of the month.

Steal Luchini!

What next? Kidnap Sophie Marceau?

So this is my fault?

You brought the guy here.

An hour ago, you were glad.

Before signing, he said he'd
be a sleeping partner in London.

Now he's in Samuel's
chair, threatening us!

Who is this school friend
of yours, Bernard Tapie?

Samuel's office isn't a shrine,

we have to move on.

And sell up to a psychopath?

Wait, who let Ramzy and Efira go?

Who? Quit blaming everyone else!

Andréa...

Andréa what?

He loses our two biggest stars,

then has a fainting fit!

I thought you were a fighter!

- Stop it.
- A talent is like a woman,

you have to fight for her.

- Shut up!
- Mathias, you too.

- I'm going after Luchini!
- Great, go ahead.

Just keep me out of
this ludicrous revenge!

I will, don't worry.

Find out everything
you can about Luchini.

Projects, contracts,

hobbies, phobias... Everything, now!

Hi.

Sofia Leprince!

The queen of stool throwing.

My former assistant. Those
stitches... it was her.

- Hi.
- Right, so...

By the way, sorry about that.

Put your bag down, let's go.

We're running late for a change!

Just one question...

I haven't seen the whole script.

I'm unsure about the character.

She's described as "fresh
and sexy with a big smile"

but nothing about her personality.

She's just a young,
pretty, sexy secretary.

She runs into her boss and
decides to seduce him. Okay?

Come on,

- let's go.
- Okay.

Hitting on her boss in a butcher's shop?

Plus he's old enough to be her father...

Does she have issues
or is she just pathetic?

Honey, if you want to be
a writer, get another job.

We're wasting time.

- Let's do this.
- Okay, yes.

- Should I look... ?
- Better had.

Okay.

Hi, fancy meeting you here.

I come most days, I've never seen you.

The Morteau sausage is spectacular.

You should try the...

Stop right there. It's lunchtime
but you've ruined my appetite.

Your eyes are blank,
nothing is going on.

Blank inside, never mind outside.

Frankly, it's boring.

It isn't complicated.

She's cute, sleeping
her way to the top...

Not unlike yourself.

Of all the girls, she's the
one I have to explain to.

Excuse me?

What did you say?

- What I had to say.
- Yeah, but..

Alright, now calm down! This isn't news,

everyone knows. Sure!

An actress who sleeps with
her agent to get auditions...

This part should not demand
a big effort from you.

You look totally...

The part was written for you.

You are her! Now let's go.

Ready? In your own time...

FABRICE LUCHINI: Farewell to the stage?

How's it going?

Have you eaten?

Yeah, a zero-sugar soda.

You found some interesting stuff?

Why, are you interested?

Come on, Andréa. This isn't my fault.

I just came to offer my help.

No need, I can manage on my own.

f*ck it.

Agence ASK, hello?

I no longer represent Ramzy. I
don't know his agent's number!

Honestly, people are so incompetent!

What's this country coming to?

Mathias, have you seen a doctor?

He'd just tell me to sleep, do sport,

eat vegetables. I don't have the time.

Fainting fits can be serious.

You could have split your
head and k*lled yourself!

Do you know about shamanism?

Not really.

I know you're skeptical about allopathy.

Well, I know an extraordinary shaman.

I could hook you up with him...

Is that contract ready
for Nathalie Baye?

Actually it's incredible.

He's really opened my eyes.

Thanks to him, I've
discovered my totem animal.

The beaver.

Yes, Mathias, I'm from
a family of builders!

- Is that it?
- Yes.

- Guy Marchand is lead.
- Okay.

You're Dario, the railroad
worker and supporting actor.

- Great!
- Yeah.

He's a young, politically
committed idealist,

not very comfortable with girls...

So you thought of me!

Exactly!

She almost became a hooker
to get you the audition.

Not true.

Well, thanks.

Shall I see you out?

Yeah.

Bye.

How's your mom?

Bromazepam is her new best friend.

How's he?

- He collapsed a couple of weeks ago.
- What!

- Didn't you know?
- He didn't tell me.

He never tells me
anything. Why start now?

Drop by and see him.

I don't know.

It's always really uncomfortable.

Anyway you're here.

I need to step back a little.

I'm spending a lot of
time at my girlfriend's.

- You have a girlfriend.
- Yeah.

Yeah, it's very recent.

Her father's Vietnamese,
Definitely not my half-sister!

Doors opening...

Well, I'll be going.

- We'll call each other?
- For sure.

Cool.

- Bye.
- Bye... Break a leg!

Doors closing...

f*ck!

Sorry, excuse me.

No, I wasn't talking to you.

I'll put you through.

- You stay there.
- Okay, my sweet?

Great, as you see.

Can I do anything to lighten your mood?

- Did La Mercerie call?
- No...

What have you done now?

- Me? What did I do?
- Yes.

That's not what I meant.

You know what that depressive
hyena accused me of?

- No.
- Sleeping with you to get ahead!

She sits there and calls me a
whore, like it's perfectly normal.

Forget it, I'll call her.

- We'll sort it out.
- Just tell her!

sh*t, it's her.

- Rip her a new one!
- I'll take care of her.

Hi, Constance, how's it going?

How's it going?

Are you kidding me! I'm all d*sfigured!

- I look like...
- No...

- some kind of smurf!
- I barely touched her!

What? A bruised face...

- They're just dark rings!
- That's enough!

Sorry, Constance...

- That's enough.
- Here...

actors are sent to you with an apology!

- They hate you!
- Sorry, Constance.

It's okay, I've got this.

They hate you!

- I'm through with her!
- She's very powerful.

I don't care!

Since when do we let casting
directors insult our actors?

She'll say you're
protecting your girlfriend.

- People talk.
- Oh, so people talk? Where?

Sofia has auditioned for a lot of parts.

For example, Brigitte Bardot.

So I'm helping her,

that's what agents do.

- Try it sometime!
- But you take it too far.

Imagine suggesting

Omar Sy for a Johnny Hallyday biopic.

They're doing a Johnny Hallyday biopic?

Hang on a moment.

- This Sofia works at reception?
- Yes.

- She's an actress?
- Yes.

- You're her agent.
- Right.

- And her lover.
- That's no one's business, Mathias.

- Well, it has to stop.
- Excuse me?

What is this, North Korea? The
boss says who you can sleep with?

Do what you like with her

but don't represent her.

That's not how it works!

I do what I like with my
clients. That's how we operate.

Every dossier is sacred. Always.

So much for solidarity.
Thanks a bunch, guys!

"Just don't represent
her!" What's that all about?

Frankly he's got a point.

Excuse me?

Hicham is as tactful
as a turd in a punchbowl

but it's tricky.

Tricky for Sofia,
tricky for the agency...

It's not good for couples
to do everything together.

Yeah? Okay. Ike and Tina Turner,

Mia Farrow and Woody
Allen, John and Yoko...

Legendary couples who worked together.

One was a wife-beater,

one ran off with his daughter,

the other was m*rder*d.

Does it matter if another
agent represents her?

I'm at my wits' end.

- Another drink?
- Yeah.

A Mojito, please.

Same again.

Cheers.

Hi.

- How about a drink later?
- For sure.

Cool.

Hi.

How are you?

Can I get you a drink?

- Something affectionate about you...
- Turn around.

What the... examine her!

Now stop it. Seriously.

I'd rather be sucked...

I'm done for. Potatoes in the bag.

I need a shag to relax me...

Camille...

Why don't you date Hippolyte Rivière?

Because... don't be ridiculous.

That's the dumbest answer I ever heard.

We're friends, that's all.

Are you kidding? Sparks fly between you.

I'm with Hervé, you
were meant for each other!

No, we're too alike.

It's my dream, to sleep with my double.

You're walking out on us?

No, just going to the bathroom.

Actually, Hervé...

They're childhood friends.

Who?

Camille and Hippolyte.

She grew up in Mandelieu.

Their fathers know each other well.

Are you on dr*gs? You've
been in my bag again!

I swear,

I'm sworn to secrecy but she told me.

- Her father is a friend of Mathias's.
- Why can't she say so?

She's a love child.
It's a family secret.

Who's her father?

Hervé, swear on your mother's life

never to repeat this to a soul.

- I swear...
- Christophe Lambert!

- Seriously!
- I swear.

- She does look like him.
- You think so too?

- Mango smoothie anyone?
- Yeah!

Sure you're not overdoing it?

- Bitch!
- Anything on Luchini?

He's not in a relationship.

He just moved to a block in Montmartre

where Céline once stayed.

And he's allergic to coconut.

We're not planning a homicide.

He works out at a gym
in the 1st district.

Good! What day, what time?

No idea.

Then find out... Bitch!

Pull, release...

Pull, release...

Pull, release...

Pull, release... It's bit feeble.

- Too heavy for me.
- I didn't load any weights!

- It must be bust.
- Get a sweat on or it won't look credible.

You're as stiff as a marteau.

Pull, release...

Now jog, every second counts! Go!

- Hello, Fabrice!
- Hi.

- How are you?
- Fine.

I just love this gym.
Do you come here often?

Yes, I put a lot into it. To no avail!

I know you, you're an agent, right?

- Andréa Martel, I work at ASK.
- Hi, how's it going?

- Good.
- You're not at work?

Shouldn't you be at the office?

Actually I'm at work right now.

- I'm here for you.
- For me?

You're a rare talent.

Our paths never seem to cross

so I contrived a meeting.

What are you offering?

Fresh impetus.

Impetus? You think I need it?

No, that's not what I meant.

I'm talking about space.

With you, the horizon
seems vast. Endless even.

It makes me want to explore it
with you, to conquer new lands.

- You're an enthusiast!
- You inspire me.

This is all a bit weird,

turning up in a gym

to headhunt an old actor
working on his buttocks.

Anyway I'm with Bréhier,
have been for 35 years.

We're an old couple. I like him.

Fabrice, you're a passionate man.

I'm sure you'd like something
more... Something new.

Newness is a concept
that doesn't interest me.

- Really?
- Oh yes.

Maybe you just want to be bored.

Don't knock boredom.

It's everywhere, even in masterpieces.

Okay.

So I'll leave you to
be bored with Bréhier.

Have a nice day.

Nice figure. Do you come here often?

No, it's my first time.

Really? Some people have all the luck.

What will we tell Hicham?

He's in London, we have breathing space.

Doors opening...

You didn't leave?

No, I'd rather stay here, it's more fun.

Everyone in my office, I want a word.

Janowski... so you
have Polish roots too?

On my father's side.

Me, it's my mother's side.

Hervé André-Jézak. Jézak is
Polish. Where's the Hicham from?

My mother is Moroccan.

The Mediterranean meets the Baltic.
Lots of hot and cold currents!

Excuse me, sir.

- How do we handle wages?
- Why?

A large pay cut was planned
on account of the debts.

No, don't worry, that's over now.

My companies don't lose money.

Janowski, we can't just
schedule impromptu meetings.

First names, Mathias, please!

Why the lengthy lunch breaks?

They're working lunches, not breaks.

Sometimes we have two,
one after the other.

Alright. Anyway...

I was studying the agency
figures, we have few young actors.

It's hard to spot youngsters.

For every one you discover,
you get stuck with ten losers.

You have to send them to auditions,

persuade directors to meet them...

It isn't easy.

Plus unknowns don't earn us any money.

The thing is, youth is the future.

No more focusing on capricious,
self-important old actors.

We'll recruit a new agent.

Oh, that takes ages!

Will internal candidates be considered?

Absolutely! You too, girls.

No, thanks.

I'm quite happy working
as Mathias's assistant.

I'm only 23, so...

Perfect! The age I was when
I started my first company.

Ah, okay.

By the way... what about Luchini?

Maybe I wasn't clear.

Sure, you'll sell out to StarMedia
if we don't reel him in quick.

But I didn't mention the bonus.

You think we can be bought?

A large bonus.

How much?

10,000 each.

- 15!
- 12!

15, then.

Deal!

Now a bonus is up for
grabs, everyone is on board.

I offered to help, you
wanted to head for the gym

on your own!

Hey, it's fine, you're a
bunch of jackals, admit it.

No, we're just agents.

So where are you?

Well, I haven't got very far.

We didn't talk much.
He dug his heels in.

- You dug your heels in!
- Mathias, let her speak.

He seemed tired, kind of depressed.

I pitched newness and enthusiasm

but it seemed to annoy
him, which made me tense.

So I told him to stay
bored with Bréhier.

You're a f*cking drag when you do that.

Only she plants the seed of truth

and you chew over what she said.

It pains me to say it but it's true.

Thanks, guys.

Now we have to discredit
Bréhier in the eyes of Luchini.

Any ideas?

- What does Luchini want for?
- Nothing.

He's played everything.

No, you know what he lacks?
An international career.

I read he'd love to play
a James Bond villain.

Supposing we put it about
that he was being sounded out

for the next Bond but Bréhier
screwed up the contract

A fake contract...

negotiations fell through...

- Negligence on the part of Bréhier?
- Yes.

- Poor communications.
- I contacted the James Bond

casting manager for Léa Seydoux.

Her name's Debbie MacWilliams.

- Could you ask her to lie?
- Sorry, I haven't slept with her.

And...

Does Luchini know her?

I could find out... Why?

What's she like?

An English girl... Look.

Debbie MacWilliams.

You're kidding.

One of my actresses, Linda Gérard.

She's half Scottish.

We're not sending a
fake Debbie MacWilliams!

Why not? This girl hasn't
acted in ages but she was good!

Now she's a farmer, rearing ducks.

Might work.

You're all crazy!

It's her!

- Shall we call her?
- Let's do it.

If Luchini figures the ruse,
we'll be a laughing stock.

Don't worry, he won't,
we'll do it right.

Supposing he traces the number?

We'll hide the caller ID.

Supposing one day he
finds out it wasn't her.

So some crazy Scottish actress

passed herself off
as Debbie MacWilliams.

We'll say some of your
clients were fooled by her too.

Meanwhile we'll have
Luchini on our books.

- This excites you, right?
- Yeah, a bit.

Debbie?

Fabrice! You're finally here.

- I didn't keep you waiting?
- No.

But you're an elusive man!

I thought you were avoiding me.
Or maybe don't like James Bond!

I don't understand it.

I know a lot of agents in Paris
but I never hear from yours.

What's he doing?

No idea. Maybe the international
aspect bothered him.

He's regional, like me.
I'm a regional actor too.

There's something wrong.

I agree, I don't get it.

- Anyway, tell me everything.
- You're right.

The main thing is to meet each other.

So it's about the next Bond.

You'd make a great villain.

I'd love to do it.

To play a Bond villain is a dream.

A childhood dream. It
would be amazing for me.

Unfortunately it's too late.

The casting is done.

It's going to be Antonio Banderas.

I don't understand.

So why am I here?

I wanted to meet you.

I've got this independent
movie, set in Northern Ireland.

A small budget but beautiful.

In the open air, in the rain.

We need someone to
play a French teacher.

You'd be wonderful.

How did he seem?

Crushed? Pale?

That's great! Well
done, Linda. Excellent!

Remember the confidentiality clause.

It's a surprise, no one must know.

I said no one must know!

Oh, hi! How are you?

- I'm so happy to see you again.
- Likewise.

Are you still with that blonde?

sh*t, wait...

I should have bought
rechargeable batteries.

- The traditional method.
- Yes.

It's working again.

No, that's my phone.

Wait... f*ck.

Hello?

You okay, Fabrice?

No...

nothing special.

Now?

Yeah, okay.

I'm on my way. See you in a moment.

See you in a moment.

- f*ck!
- Who's Fabrice?

Your boyfriend? You're bi?

No, this is work.

At this hour? Can't it wait?

No, sorry, it's an emergency. We'll
resume shortly, with batteries!

Are you awake? Guess who just called.

Luchini!

f*ck!

So what does he want?

He's a great insomniac.

He's seen Debbie, he's
chewing things over.

Well, don't be aggressive.

Nice and easy, lots of charm.

- Sure.
- Alright?

Don't worry!

Fingers crossed. You're the best.

- Bye.
- Take care.

Oh, f*ck!

We're moving in on Luchini.

- Yeah?
- That would be amazing.

- Crazy!
- Awesome.

- Honestly, this thing!
- Is it good?

Really funny.

With more female parts
than male for once.

- Really?
- Yes.

I didn't give you this.

No, Camille thought it was good for me.

It's so nice of her.
She's such a sweet girl.

She'd make a great agent.

She has an instinct
with people, a heart...

A bit like you... only less hairy!

It's great.

So... would you let her represent you?

Are you crazy? You're my agent.

Hypothetically speaking I mean.

- You don't want to be my agent?
- Sure I do.

It's just that working
together is hard sometimes.

Right?

Is this on account of
that clown La Mercerie?

No,

I was talking to Hicham and the others.

They said it's hard
to mix everything up.

It can be damaging for you.

No, I'd never change agents.

You found me, you know
me, stick up for me...

I don't want anyone else but you.

What about this idea for a junior agent?

I don't know.

I think I'd like it.

For you, you mean?

Sure...

I feel comfortable with unknown actors.

I identify with them.

I want to fight for them,

move forward with them.
It's great to reveal people.

Camille, you're young and
enthusiastic, that's great.

But the reality is,

it takes years to become an agent.

You need to know people,

build up a network, have
some sort of standing,

otherwise you're not credible.

You're right.

Look, you'll learn fast with
Andréa, she's a great agent.

But you've only been
here for three months.

- Seven.
- No.

It's true.

It's five months since I moved out?

It's open.

It's open!

- Hi.
- Hi.

Would you like tea?

No, thanks, I'm fine.

How are you? You seem out of sorts.

No, I'm pretty depressed.

I missed out on a Bond movie,

it was my childhood dream.

So I left Bréhier.

That's good!

Don't get excited.

I didn't quit Bréhier to
take up with another agent.

I'm going to have an agent break.

Meaning?

I've no movies planned,

I'm doing theater for a few
months, I can manage on my own,

I don't need anyone.

I'm sorry, I really liked you, Andréa.

It's like being ditched
when we never dated.

Yeah, that's kind of it.

You dragged me from the arms of
a beautiful woman to tell me that.

You're a d*ke?

I'm not sure the word
still exists but...

A hundred years ago they called
it the "accursed brioche".

You had Baudelaire's "doomed
women" then the "accursed brioche".

When did this start?

I must have been 11
or 12, maybe younger.

Where does it come from?

Well... the same place as you!

No, male libido is
nothing like female libido.

The male libido is mechanical,

nothing more than a cheap jolt,

whereas the female libido is limitless.

Tell me about the girl you left behind.

She has blonde hair,

diaphanous, almost transparent skin...

faded blue,

glacial eyes that melt you.

A low-key, sensible girl.

The voluptuousness of reserve.

Exactly. She rarely lets
go so when she does...

it's even more beautiful.

Well... I'm sorry I disturbed you.

Don't worry, the batteries were flat.

You don't mince words.

But she wasn't the one in my bed.

I've lost her forever.

How about a night at
the theater, then dinner?

No ulterior motives.

Just do something gratuitous for once.

I'd like that.

Doors closing...

I think you're right.

Combining work and relationships is...

So will you ditch me
or find a new agent?

If I change agent, you
can still advise me,

or give me discreet help.

Sure.

Who have you got in mind? Andréa?

I don't know, she's pretty scary.

Plus she's your friend, it's tricky.

Arlette might not be a good
choice for a young actress.

- Although we like her!
- Yes.

I was thinking of Mathias.
Because he's a good agent...

With him, no one can say I'm
getting preferential treatment.

I'm sure you're right.
He's a good choice.

Yes, I think so.

- See you shortly.
- Yes.

Have we had a wild night?

Exactly!

- Guess who with.
- Who?

- Fabrice Luchini.
- No.

You didn't have to go that far.

No... it was wild and platonic.

He's quit Bréhier.

f*ck, that is good news! I like that!

- Calm down, Arlette.
- What a wowser he is!

We talked all night, I adore the guy.

I don't want to boast but
I think he likes me too.

I don't get it. Did he say yes?

Not yet, but he's invited
me to the theater tonight.

Let's not celebrate just
yet but it's looking good!

See, Mathias? We just had to be bold.

Right.

Bye!

It's so easy to apply.

- Actually it's a liquid.
- Yes.

In this silicone thing...

Your dad!

Noémie! How are you?

Well... I don't need to introduce you.

No... no.

No.

Oh my goodness.

At the same time,

Seeing you both side by
side... it's so touching.

- You're very emotional.
- Yes.

Can I take a photo?

Yes!

Sorry.

No problem.

She knows I'm a fan of yours,
and as I'm pretty shy...

I'm shy too, but I'm nice.

Closer...

There you go. Big smile...

That's it!

- Hi, Christophe.
- Mathias!

- How are you?
- I'm good.

Yes.

- This way.
- Of course.

Adorable.

He wants you for the part.

You should meet him,
he's a regular guy...

What?

I didn't tell him

you were doing Marchal's new movie...

Read the script,

we'll worry about schedules later.

Yeah, sure.

Do you need something?

No...

- Do you know her?
- Who?

Camille.

Camille!

No, but she's charming.

Sparkling. Very pretty.

What do you think?

See you later, Mathias!

See you soon, Camille.

Goodbye.

Call me

So what did he give you?

Nothing...

A father-daughter thing.

Seriously, Hicham, it's coming along.

Okay? Trust me.

All this pressure isn't helping.

To help you seal the deal.

Good news obviously travels fast.

We haven't won yet.

Never count your chickens...

Open it.

Wear it tonight.

- Okay.
- Try it on.

- Now?
- Sure, I want to see it.

- I'm not trying it on now, no.
- But we're old classmates.

Plus you don't like men, so...

No one's looking. Try it.

No way am I putting this
on, now, in front of you.

Alright.

Don't let up on Luchini.

People will hear we courted him,

I don't want us to look stupid.

Okay, Martel?

Okay.

- Hi.
- That was great.

Thank you very much.

Hello.

- Hi!
- You look very elegant.

Thank you. And bravo! It was beautiful.

- You liked it?
- I loved it.

Thanks.

I loved it, I...

Your blonde friend from last night?

No, it isn't her.

She likes you, though. Get in there!

You think so?

It's plain as day.

And you know it.

No, I don't know it.

I wouldn't know where to start.

Trust me, then.

- Shall we eat?
- Yes.

Hi.

Fabrice, can we talk?

It's a bit inconvenient
right now. Call me...

Don't be taken in by her.

- She's dangerous.
- Excuse me?

The Bond gig was all hooey.

- I don't follow.
- Me neither.

- It was all your doing.
- What?

I'm flattered you think I
know Sam Mendes well enough

to tell him who to hire.

It wasn't Debbie MacWilliams you met.

So who was it?

I'm paranoid too but there's
usually a simple explanation.

She just wants revenge for
the Ramzy-Efira business.

Revenge? Why, did you
do something wrong?

Not at all. Actors are leaving ASK

because you're scrabbling
like dogs over Samuel's legacy!

You reported us to the IRS!

Now they're broke they've
sold out to an outsider,

a vulgar millionaire.

You're through!

Believe what you like, Fabrice.

I believe what I see and feel.

What happened last night...
on your balcony, that was real.

That's what counts.

You agents are very strange.

What?

Well? He said yes, didn't he?

What's with all the harassment?

Hey, calm down!

No, you calm down! Take a sleeping pill.

Andréa, please stop this.

I've had my fill of
polymorphic perverts!

The Manager of the Year can kiss my ass!

Did your staff have a mass su1c1de?

Now give me a break!

What's that?

It's a recording of a
play, called Absence.

When I ponder...

I become jealous...

A singing prisoner. How original.

Ignore the dress, it's
a low-budget short.

- You're his assistant.
- Not anymore.

This bit's funny, watch this...

Excuse me.

Yes?

Hello, Mathias. Mr.
Cachia, your neighbor.

Hello.

I'm calling about the sale

of your apartment. I'm very interested.

There must be a mistake.

I'm looking at the ad right now,

it's definitely yours.

What the hell is this?

Shall we do this later?

No, it's fine.

Only you've missed something important.

I'll go back. Let's
take it back... here.

This bit is good.

Are you okay?

Yes.

This is wonderful,
Sofia. You're wonderful.

When is your mother coming?

Next week.

How old is she?

51.

Anti-sag.

Deep-wrinkles.

Instant lifting effect.

No, she'll be insulted.

Catherine Deneuve's
creams? She'll be flattered.

Wait, I didn't show you.

I spent all night
designing calling cards

for when Hicham makes me a junior agent.

Awesome!

Color-wise I can't decide

between Versailles
boudoir and Havana dream.

That one's dark. this
is lighter, better.

You're right.

If you want me to help you
prepare your application,

or do some research...

Just ask, okay?

Then when you're an agent,
I can be your assistant.

Thanks, Camille, it's rare to
have real friends in this job.

I'm really touched.

By the way...

I know who your dad is.

You do?

How?

- It's obvious.
- Really?

But...

You're... not angry.

Everyone's entitled to
their little secrets.

Okay.

Cool.

I wanted to tell you but I
never found the right moment.

It's funny, I've been fantasizing
about your father since I was eight!

I had my first erection
watching Greystoke.

When he beheaded Highlander
with his massive sword...

- You don't mind me saying that.
- No.

Hi, you've reached Mathias Barneville.

Leave a message and I'll call you back.

Sofia, have you seen Mathias?

No.

Hi, you've reached Mathias Barneville.

Leave me a message...

Hi.

Sorry about last night.
Bréhier turned up.

Things got tense, I was scared.

It was awful. That's when you called.

Open it.

Yep, the honeymoon is over, Marteau.

Pack up your things and go.

- Stop it, Hicham.
- No, no...

There are limits. We're not animals.

Standards must be upheld.

Wait, Hicham, stop it.

Look, I said I was sorry.

What more can I do?

Go home.

- You can't fire me.
- Why not?

- I'm a partner, you need agreement.
- Fine, we'll see.

I'm majority shareholder.

You can remain a partner... at home!

Leave anything that
belongs to the company:

computer, clients... everything.

- Hello?
- Hi, Andréa.

- This is Fabrice Luchini.
- Hello, Fabrice.

- Are you well?
- I'm good.

I just wanted to tell you...

That blonde we saw last night...
I've got a date with her tonight.

Ah, well...

That's great, I'm
really pleased for you.

Thanks to you!

- Me... ?
- Let me tell you something.

You've revived me. I don't understand
that Debbie MacWilliams business

but I think it's funny.

You're a player, and it's a rare thing.

Thank you.

I'll tell you something else, if I may.

It's true, you do create new lands

and it would be my pleasure
to discover them with you.

Thanks for your call, Fabrice.

No, thank you. Take
care... My New Agent.

- See you soon.
- See you soon.

Well done, Martel.

I knew you could do it.

- Mathias!
- What are you doing here?

Oh, I'm so sorry...

- Thanks...
- Goodbye.

Goodbye.

Leave it, Noémie.

I was so worried.

I called all the hospitals,
then the fire department.

24 missed calls!

You must think I'm crazy.
I wrecked everything!

As you're from a family of builders...

you can repair it all.

Thanks.

Nathalie Baye called.

I told her we had a
deal for her contract.

Hope that's okay.

Yes, thanks.

I've seen all kinds.

Not like you, though.

Lovers facing each
other, flesh and blood,

pretending to clink
glasses instead of kissing?

I've never seen the like!

Sir, let me explain...

It's all the fault of women
who get into our heads.

Shhh!

Oh, Mathias...

Oh... Mathias!

You got it that time, right?

- What?
- The big thrill.

Let's go, right now.

- Very well.
- Go.