01x13 & 01x14 - The Mystery/The Prank

[bunniefuu]

[theme music playing]

[school bell rings]

I think cheese is better than cake

because you can have cheesecake,

but you can't have cake cheese.

[gasps]

[Banana Joe] Ugh! What is it?

I don't know.

Agh! It smells like manure!

It looks like a Rancid burrito.

I think it just moved.

Somebody do something.

[Lucy] What's going on here?

What are you poking?

Aah! It looks like a wet diaper!

[moans]

[gasps] Nigel!

[all] It's Principal Brown!

Oh, my sweet Nigel, who would shave you,

paint you, wrap you in toilet paper,

and shut you in Watterson's locker?

Who did this?

Who did this?

I want everyone in class now!

[humming]

I said "Everyone"!

Eugggh! What's that? It looks like--

We know what it looks like!

I'm taking Principal Brown
to the nurse's office!

Nurse...

Come, Nigel.

And if the culprit hasn't owned up
by the time I get back,

you're all in detention!

So, what do you guys think
happened to Principal Brown?

Well, I saw him at the end of school,

so it must've happened after that.

[chuckles nervously]

So, who stayed after school yesterday?

I was doing cheerleader stuff.

I was cleaning late.

I had detention.

I can't remember.

So you're all suspects.

Oh, come on.

It was obviously Gumball.

Yeah, Brown was found in his locker.

Guys, I didn't do it.

But I'm gonna find out who did.

And I think I know just how.

Whoever did it, raise your hand!

OK.

Whoever didn't do it, raise your hand!

What?

Aha! So you did it!

Dude, I don't have any hands!

Darn. You're good.

Aren't you supposed to, like,
look for clues or something?

Hmm. Clues.

Like those paint splatters
all over your pom-poms!

[dramatic music plays]

[all gasp]

No, wait! I can explain!

There's only one explanation.

It was a crime of passion.

What do you mean?

You knew Principal Brown
put me in detention last night,

and, overwhelmed by your feelings for me,

you confronted him in his office.

Please, let him go!

I love him, Principal Brown!

{\an }He's nothing but a rogue!

But he's noble and strong
and brave and handsome.

So handsome.

He might be the best-looking guy in the...

[high-pitched] ...whole school!

Gumball, have you seen
your yearbook photo?

No interruptions, please.

[deep voice] We all know how...

...handsome Gumball is,
but he's still in detention.

Then you leave me no choice.

[Gumball, voice-over] It was then that you
pom-pom'd him unconscious...

[grunting]

[Gumball] ...shaved off his hair
to punish him,

covered him in paint to humiliate him,

wrapped him in toilet paper
to keep him quiet,

and stuffed him in my locker as proof

of your deranged obsession for me.

-It was you!
-[gasps]

But I forgive you because I am
madly in love with you, too.

Yeah, well...

that's not quite what happened.

I had finally finished my painting
of the cheerleaders,

and I went to hang it in the stairwell.

I guess it was still wet,

and I must've got paint on my pom-poms.

And did anyone see you
supposedly hang this

alleged painting
in this "so-called" stairwell?

Yeah-- you did.

Hey, Penny!

I love you!

Your painting! Your painting!

I love your painting!

Remember?

[chuckles nervously]

Oh, yeah.

So, if Penny didn't do it, who did?

Hmm.

It must've been...

You!

I said it was him!

[squeaking]

[all gasp]

Why me?

[Gumball] Well...

yesterday, you were wandering around,

when suddenly, at the age of ,

you realized your youth was behind you.

Oh.

Then all your hair fell out.

Bummer.

[Gumball] When you saw Principal Brown's
lustrous hairy coat,

you were overcome with jealously.

Yeah!

[Gumball] And acting on impulse,
you att*cked him.

[Nigel] Aah!

[Gumball] You frantically plucked
out all of his hair,

dyed it the right color,
and used it to cover

your balding shame.

Then, planning to mislead
any investigation,

you painted Principal Brown,
wrapped him in toilet paper,

and stuffed him into my locker--

The perfect crime, save for one thing!

[all] Huh?

When you stuck the new hair on your body,

there wasn't quite enough,
which explains this bald spot

on your hand!

[all gasp]

Dude, you've got it all wrong!

I got this bald spot
when I was cleaning yesterday.

If that's the case,

how come I can just pull
your hair right off?

Agh! Oh! Stop!

Ow! No! Agh!

Oh, OK, then.

I guess it wasn't you.

Who could it be?

All this suspense is making me sweaty.

Why don't you just wipe your brow
with that toilet paper

suspiciously stuck
to the bottom of your shoe?

[gasps]

Clue!

[sighs]

I can't believe I'm gonna have
to say this, buddy, but...

It was you!

[gasps]

Yes! Yes! I did it!

I'm a monster-- a monster!

Just lock me up!

I'm a menace to society!

[sobbing]

Take me away!

I rest my case.

But Darwin couldn't have done it.

Really?

We all saw you on the bus
when we went home.

Then how do you explain the toilet paper?

You've had it on your feet all day, dude.

Didn't you notice?

[up-tempo music playing]

Nope.

Don't remember any toilet paper.

So it wasn't Penny, it wasn't Rocky,

and it wasn't Darwin,

which leaves us with only one suspect--

The only person who knew the combination

to the locker
Principal Brown was found in.

[inhales deeply]

You!

[all gasp]

Oh.

-[chuckles nervously]
-[all] Hmph!

That's all the proof I need!

You're coming with me, Watterson!

Wait! You're forgetting one bit
of crucial evidence!

And what's that?

I'll just...

go and get it.

[footsteps receding]

He's not coming back, is he?

[all] No.

No homework for the one who catches him!

[all cheer]

-[gasps]
-[growls]

[gasps]

[laughs]

[shouts]

[gasps]

[beep, boop]

-Aah!
-[gasps]

[laughs] Ow!

Quick! Give me something else to throw!

What?

Ow!

Stop throwing stuff at me!

I'm innocent!

Aaaaaah!

[all] Aaaaaaah!

[all screaming]

[grunting]

Aah!

Ouch.

[librarian] Shh!

[indistinct shouting]

Leave me alone! I'm innocent!

I would never hurt Principal Brown!

I think I'm feeling a little better.

Unh!

Aaaaah!

[gasps]

This is extraordinarily painful.

It... couldn't possibly get any worse.

[backup signal beeping]

-[crunch!]
-[all] Ohhhhh!

Bobert!

[gasps] Don't turn me in!

Oh. You've been switched off.

-[beep]
-[whirs]

Aah! Don't turn me in!

Why?

Principal Brown was att*cked,
and everyone thinks it was me!

But it wasn't you.

Exactly!

Wait. How come you believe me?

I saw everything.

-What?
-[Lucy shouting] Gumball!

Agh!

Get him!

[indistinct shouting]

Sto-o-o-o-o-p!

New evidence has come to light!

Tell them what happened, dude!

I can do better than that.

I can play you my memory.

First, Penny hung her hideous painting
on the wall.

[Penny] Hey!

[Bobert] Then Gumball turned up,
looking love-struck, as usual.

[Gumball] Hey!

[Bobert]
Next, Darwin walked down the stairs,

trailing toilet paper like a nincompoop.

[Darwin] What's a nincompoop?

[Gumball whispering]

[Darwin] Hey!

[Bobert] Then Rocky dropped a bottle
of chemicals on the floor,

looking quite old.

[Rocky] Hey!

[Bobert] And finally came Principal Brown,

whose office door suddenly flew open,

leaving him disoriented and dizzy.

He fell down the stairs,

rolling himself in Darwin's toilet paper,

smashed into Penny's artwork,

covering his face in paint,
then fell back into

Rocky's chemicals, burning off his hair,

then down more stairs,

wrapping himself
in even more toilet paper,

and finally into Gumball's locker.

Huh?

Eh. [whistling]

But why didn't you say something before?

Well, it was so funny, I blew a fuse.

I was like, "Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha-a-a-a."

-You've done it again.
-[beep]

On.

So, the true culprit is the person
who threw open

Principal Brown's door.

Exactly.

And I know just how to find out.

Whoever opened the door, put your hand up!

Oh, come on!

Why don't I just replay the tape?

Stop there!

Now forward slowly.

Freeze! There!

Zoom in %.

Zoom in %.

Zoom in another %.

Enhance video.

[all gasp]

It was you all along!

We're going to tell Principal Brown!

Tell him what?

What we just saw on Bobert's memory.

What memory?

Erase memory-y-y-y.

Who... am I?

That's not fair!

How do you sleep at night, Miss Simian?

Like a baby.

[laughs evilly]

Aaaaah!

Has anyone seen Miss Simian?

[Lucy] Aaaaah!

Don't worry, Miss Simian!

We just called an ambulance!

[backup signal beeping]

[crunch!]

[all] Ohhhhh!

[dog barking]

Hey, Dad, can you pass the sugar?

[gasps, snickers]

Sure, Gumball. Here's the sugar.

[snickers]

[humming]

Blah!

Eugggggggggh!

It probably just needs more sugar.

[snickering]

Blah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah!

[coughs] This tastes terrible!

[slurps]

It tastes like salt.

[laughing]

That's because I swapped
the sugar for the salt!

[laughs]

It was the greatest prank ever!

OK, you got me.

But that's not the greatest prank.

This is.

Hey, Dad, does this ketchup
look funny to you?

Hmm. I'll check.

But afterwards, don't forget to show me

that prank you were talking about.

Looks OK to me!

Aah!

[both laugh]

What'd you do that for?

You got ketchup all over me.

That was the prank.

Yeah, we did it because it's funny!

No, it isn't.

It's only funny when it happens
to someone else!

How could you do this to your own father?

[crying]

That wasn't very nice.
You two should know better.

What? You didn't tell him off
for pranking us!

You know it's too late for your father.

I want you two to apologize
by the time I get back.

[door opens, closes]

Do you think Mr. Dad will be OK?

Eh, he probably forgot about it already.

[grunting]

Hello, children.

[both] Hey, Dad.

Why don't you try on
these lovely new shoes?

This is a prank, isn't it?

What? P-- Prank?

What, me prank you? No!

[chuckles nervously]

No! [sputters] Hmph! Sheesh!

I would like to return these shoes,
please.

Unfortunately, sir, you seem to have
filled them with baked beans.

I did nothing of the sort, sir!

Well, I'm sure you wouldn't
mind putting them on

and taking a walk to prove it, huh?

And I'm sure I wouldn't mind either!

[squish]

[shudders]

On second thoughts,
I think I shall keep them.

I happen to have grown quite
attached to them.

[squish]

[woman] Welcome to
"Pranks for Beginners."

Over the next minutes--

Thirty minutes?

That's two subs, a muffin,
and a tub of ice cream.

Oh, and I better get a sausage
for the last seconds.

[Richard] Mmm!

[gulps]

Mental note-- next time, take food

for the journey back, as well.

[Gumball] Step one-- go out
onto the roof of the house.

Step two-- take off all of your clothes.

[both snicker]

Step three--
pretend that you are a ballerina

while repeatedly slapping yourself
in the face.

Dude, this cannot be real.

♪ I'm a ballerina! ♪

♪ I'm a ballerina! I'm a ballerina! ♪

♪ I'm a ballerina! ♪

[Gumball] Step five-- realize
you've just been pranked.

Step six-- try and fit down
the chimney headfirst.

[both snickering]

[grunting]

[snoring]

Aw, look-- he's been up all night
trying to find a way to get back at us.

Yep, he's definitely out cold.

[creaks]

[snoring]

[both snicker]

I can't wait to see the look on his face
when he wakes up.

[both laughing]

Uh...

Uh...

Dude, I don't think he's waking up.

Where does this river go?

Uh, I think it goes out to sea.

[Darwin]
Do you think he'll be mad, Gumball?

[Gumball]
No. It's just a small, harmless... prank.

[man, on TV] If you're deciding where to
go for a hamburger,

look no further than the burger park.

[door opens]

[door closes]

Dad! Are you OK?

Can I get you something to eat
or something?

No. I still have plenty of coconuts.

What happened to your clothes?

I ate them!

How do we know when
we've taken this too far?

I think we'll know when we get there.

[giggles]

[grunting]

[laughs]

This is just too easy.

[laughs]

-[Gumball] Dad!
-[gasps]

Hey, Darwin and I were thinking
of going outside.

{\an }Oh, OK.

Shall we go into
the front yard or the backyard?

[snickers] The backyard!

It's always nice at this time of year.
[snickers]

Hey, you know what else would be fun?

What?

Going through the window.

What are you talking about?
Are you crazy?

Well, how else are we
gonna get to the backyard?

Through the door!

The what?

The door! Like this!

Aah!

[muffled shouting]

[crash]

[siren wailing]

Sir, please stop struggling
so we can get the bucket off.

[muffled] It's stuck!

How did this happen?

Well, we saw our dad putting the bucket
on top of the kitchen door, and--

You saw me? How could you do this to me?

You betrayed me-- my own children!

I look like a fool!

I don't want anyone to see me like this!

Sir, please calm down!

[Richard] Leave me alone!

Get off my lawn!

It's no use. Eddie, tranquilizer.

[Richard] Leave...

me... alone...

[mutters]

[moans]

[clank]

Hey, Dad, so, things got
a little carried away there

what with, you know, you going out to sea
and getting tranquilized and everything.

So... it was a lot of fun, but I think
it's about time to call it a day, OK?

Yeah, I think we've
all learned a valuable lesson

about not taking pranks too far.

Let's have a feel-good hug.

[both sigh]

This doesn't feel like a happy ending.

[whispering] What are we gonna do?

I don't know.

[normal voice] Huh?

Maybe we should just go outside again--

this time, through the front door.

Good idea, Gumball!

OK...

prepare to get wet.

What the what?

I'm gonna prank you!

[sputtering maniacally]

[both scream]

[sputtering continues]

[panting]

Gumball, what's wrong with you?

You're hyperventilating!

Stop panicking, Gumball!

Just calm down!

Get... a... grip!

Snap... out... of... it!

Cut it out! You're making it worse!

Oh, sorry.

[panting]

There, there, buddy.

There, there.

Is that better?

Much better.

Now hold me and tell me
everything is going to be OK.

Everything's gonna be OK, buddy.

How about a little kiss?

[sighs]

-[sputtering maniacally]
-[both scream]

Prank time!

[both screaming]

[panting]

Aaaaaaah!

[singsong voice] Where are you?

We're not under the sofa!

[normal voice] Aha!

[shouts]

Huh?

Hmm.

[both gasp]

And that's it for tonight's news at : .

Here's Garbin with the weather.

It will be very hot here
with temperatures soaring

to degrees below zero
on the northern front of the warm drift

with isolating regions of the cold snaps.

And there will be a beautiful rainbow.

Hmm. I wonder what else is on TV.

How could you?

It's not what it looks like.
Please, don't leave me.

No! It can never be the same again!

And here, captured on film
for the first time,

we see the chicken crab.

[squawking]

[snapping]

♪ A music video, a music video ♪

♪ Yeah, we are in a music video ♪

♪ This is what you call a music video ♪

♪ Oh, baby, we're singing ♪

♪ I'm in a music video-o-o ♪

Run.

[panting]

[cackling manically]

[sputtering maniacally]

[both screaming]

[panting]

Look, the air vent-- it's the only way!

[grunting]

It's no use!

[roaring]

Stand back! I'm warning you!

[Richard cackling manically]

You leave me no choice!

Ohhhh!

[laughs]

You should've seen your faces!

You really thought I was gonna get you!

[laughing]

You mean that whole thing was a prank?

[laughing] Yeah, and you
totally bought it!

Dad, that was terrible!

How could you do that to your
own children?

It's always funny when
the joke's on someone else.

[laughs]

You almost dropped a block
of solid concrete on our heads!

Yeah, I have no idea
what happened with that.

It was wet when I poured it in.

And all the bursting
through walls and stuff?

[laughing] I'll be honest with you--

I broke five ribs, but it was all worth it

just to see your faces.

Good job, Dad. You totally got us.

-We're sorry we pranked you.
-[laughs]

No, it's me that should be sorry.

But it was us who took it too far.

Yeah, but I was the one who started it.

[door opens]

Who... did... this?

[all] It was him!

[theme music playing]