02x10 - The Most You You Can Be

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Insatiable". Aired: August 10, 2018 – October 11, 2019.*
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17-year-old Patty Bladell was bullied at school for being overweight, but after a violent encounter with a homeless man and a summer of liquid diet, she becomes thin and determined to exact revenge on her bullies at the start of her senior year.
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02x10 - The Most You You Can Be

Post by bunniefuu »

Boo.

No, you don't. Get back here.

We have some unfinished business.

You left me like roadkill.

You tried to k*ll me first.

Don't you dare put that on me.

Die already, you crazy bitch!

I'm... not... crazy!

Hey.

How's it going? What's going on?

I found Christian's phone in your purse.

What? Uh...

What do you mean?

Did you know you had it?

No! No, he must have put it in there.

He's still stalking me.

Well, we should go to the police.

No.

No, I mean, just no police.

Not until after the pageant.
I can't handle any more stress right now.

What are you doing?

Working out.
Just promise me, please. No cops, okay?

Okay, fine, I promise. But...

Okay. Good. I gotta go. Bye.

Oh, my God.

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Yeah, baby let me be your waitress ♪

♪ I'm about to serve it up ♪

♪ Baby hit 'em with the blank checks ♪

♪ I be gettin' what I want ♪

♪ Like you more if you say less ♪

♪ You can't tell me nothing ♪

♪ Ooh, I wanna see you shake it ♪

- ♪ Got it right there ♪
- f*ck you! f*ck you!

- ♪ Serve it up ♪
- Bitch!

♪ I'm about to serve it up ♪

♪ You serve it up
I'm about to serve it up ♪

Ooh!

♪ You serve it up
I'm about to serve it up ♪

- ♪ You serve it up... ♪
- I should've gotten rid of that body

right away, but I couldn't.
Not without a snack.

For the first time in my life,

I was on top of the world.

I was a hometown hero,

I won mayor by a landslide,

and I had a budding new romance.

sh*t.

I've got to get back to Patty.

We've got to get ready
for Miss American Lady.

It should have been enough.
I should have left well enough alone.

I'll come with you.

To the pageant?

Sure, why not?

I don't take office for another month.

Maybe I should coach Patty one last time.

I thought a snack would help me think,
but it turned into the binge of my life.

I'd been locked in my room eating
for a day and a half straight.

I completely tuned out the world.

Patty, you decent?

Yes. No, I'm not.

Just give me one second.

- Don't come in!
- Patty? Are you looking at p*rn?

Yes, I am looking at p*rn!

Okay, well, don't pay for it.
There's a lot of free sites.

I'll be right there. I...

What's going on? We're coming in.

Hey, you guys are together,

like, together together.

Yeah. We wanted to talk to you
about that.

I am... I'm fine with it.
As long as you guys are happy.

No, no. No, don't.

Don't. No, don't, ple...

Patty, what is going on?

I'm just... I'm scared
about Miss American Lady.

I've never competed without you before.

Well, you don't have to.

If you're still up for it,
I want to coach you again.

You do?

It'd sure make me feel better.

An extra set of eyes on you
with the pageant k*ller still out there.

But, Bob, I thought you said
you were bad for me.

I'm gonna let you two talk.

Patty.

Look,

now that I've found my own success...

...I'm a new me.

Which means we can be a new version of us.

It will be different this time.

Besides, we've come this far.

I think we owe it to ourselves to give it
one more sh*t,

but I need you to promise me something.

Yeah. No, yeah. Anything.

Okay, I'm Mayor now,

so no more shenanigans,
no more drama,

and you have to be honest.

Yes. Absolutely.

I promise.

Mm...

Something smells ripe.

Oh, yeah.

I'm gonna take a shower
and get ready.

Call you in a few hours?

No. I'm gonna wait downstairs.

There's no time to spare.

We leave for Miss American Lady
tomorrow morning,

and we've got shopping to do.

- Ooh...
- Ooh...

f*ck!

Shh...

With Bob downstairs, getting rid of
Stella Rose's body would have to wait.

I just needed to do something
about the smell.

Patty, let's go. Now.

Hang on. I gotta change.

At least one of us smelled better.

Bob, honey? The door was open.

Are you here?

Hey.

Hey.

Oh, sweetheart.

I know this is a hard time for you
right now.

But I have some news
that I have to share with you.

Okay.

After the drama of the debate,
I got some national attention.

And, well, an investor called me
and he wants to fund Tampoozle

and make it like a TOMS Shoes.

So each box of Tampoozles that they sell,

they'll donate one to a woman
in need of feminine hygiene products

- with no pink tax, which is...
- great.

I'm gonna meet with him this afternoon,

and, well, if that meeting goes well,
I'll be moving to Atlanta.

Move?

I thought you decided to have the baby.

So?

So do you really want to start
a new business on top of all that?

I mean, isn't that too much to handle
on your own?

Wow!

Way to be supportive.

Well, I want to be supportive. I...

Especially if I'm the father.

Let's say you are.

You want to move to Atlanta with me
and help me raise the kid?

No, that'd feel too much like me
and Etta Mae all over again,

but I need a fresh start,

and if I'm gonna have
any chance of having that,

I can't be wondering if there's
another kid out there that's mine

and I'm not taking responsibility
for him or her.

I did that once. I don't want to make
the same mistake twice.

I need to know who the father is.

Okay.

All I need from you is a sample.

What, right now?

No, no, no!

A cheek swab.

I knew that.

Is this really the mall where I got taken?

Yeah.

It's so nice...

finally being back here with you.

I should have never left you alone.

Be right back.

"A happy life is just in front of you."

Dixie, baby?

Momma!

Oh, I was hoping you'd say that.

Okay, come on.

We're gonna have some fun. I got a plan.

- ♪ I see through it all ♪
- Okay.

♪ The optical illusions
'cause they can never prove it... ♪

What makes Miss American Lady different
from all the other pageants

is that this one will be televised.

You will be in HD,
and the camera doesn't lie.

♪ We know what it's like
to strain our eyes... ♪

The audience will be able to see
every pore.

- We have to hide every flaw...
- ♪ To keep our open eyes ♪

- ...every blemish.
- ♪ Push into the light ♪

- ♪ 'Cause it's always better later ♪
- We'll contour your cheeks,

strengthen your jaw.

What's wrong with my jaw?

Nothing, when I'm done with you.

Now that we have your make-up done,
it is time for a camera test.

Find your light and make sure

to keep your chin up.

Patty, you have company.

Pastor Mike!

We need to talk about Christian's phone.

- You told him?
- Why wouldn't she?

Unless you have something to hide.

You said not to go to the cops,

so I used the Find My Phone app,
and the phone never even left Georgia.

He told Magnolia he was going
to California, so I went to Pastor Mike

- to see if he had any information.
- I was just as confused as Nonnie.

How did you get his phone?

I don't know.

He must have put it in my purse
to track me.

He's a stalker.
He's done stuff like that before.

Or you're lying.

You get your hand off my daughter. Now.

You did something to him. I can feel it.

Yeah, and last time I saw you,
you said she was possessed.

You're having impure thoughts...

about him!

- And what is a Mississippi Milkshake?
- Eww.

You know what?
Just get the hell out of my house.

You're not getting away with this.
I am calling the police.

- Get out.
- Can I speak to you?

For a moment? Alone?

What's a Mississippi Milkshake?

You knew Nonnie found the phone,
and you didn't tell me?

- You said no more drama.
- I also said no more secrets.

He is going to the police.

Okay, so let's think. The body is gone.
You took care of the car, right?

Yes. I took the car to the junkyard
and paid Junkyard Bob to crush it.

And you watched it go
through the crusher, right?

What?

Seriously?

Oh, my God!

Christian's car. It's just been sitting
here the whole time?

He said he was gonna take care of it.

Did you at least get rid of the...

Bob, this is a m*rder w*apon.
I could have been arrested.

Need I remind you which one of us
k*lled somebody?

Okay. We don't have to play
the blame game.

We need to crush this car right now.

How? Junkyard Bob isn't here.

Really? You had to put on the overalls?

What? It was a $4,000 suit.

Bye-bye, evidence. Bye-bye, drama.

Hey, did you empty the gas t*nk?

What?

I should've taken that car as a sign
that even with the new me,

Patty's and my relationship was nothing
but combustible.

I should have taken that car as a sign

to get rid of this evidence right away.

But now I was more concerned
about my own body than Stella Rose's.

I had just had the binge of my life,
and Miss American Lady was just days away.

And everyone knows the camera
adds ten pounds.

Clearly, my priorities were out of whack.

sh*t, sh*t, sh*t!

I needed to get rid of this body

before Bob picked me up
for Miss American Lady.

Patty!

Bob. Wh... You're early.

Oh, you look terrible.

Are those the same clothes
you wore yesterday?

I'm not ready.

What's all this?

I rented a van

so we can transport the entire entourage
to Chicago in one car!

Entourage?

Woot, woot!

Miss American Lady, here we come!

And I decorated the van.

Wow.
You guys really went all out.

Plus, I got you security.

Oh, my God! Officer Greg.

- What are you doing here?
- Nonnie asked me to come along.

If Christian's still stalking you,
you need protection.

No! I mean, that's sweet, but no.

I would hate to take you off your b*at.
The people of Masonville need you.

No way! Everyone's saying another girl
could die,

and I'm kind of hoping if I'm the one
to catch the pageant k*ller,

- I'll finally make detective. You know?
- Ready to hit the road?

Let me get that for ya.

No, no, no, no, no!

Go upstairs and change.

So much for leaving my baggage behind.

♪ Holiday road ♪

Look, kids. The Hancock Building.
The Sears Tower!

♪ Holiday road ♪

We need a name for us.

Bangie. Mm.

Bobange. Mm...

Oh...

Angob.

Sounds serious.

Yeah, it could be.

I mean, I care about you.
I don't want this to just be about sex.

I don't either.

- But I... I'm fine taking it slow.
- I...

You just got out of a 20-year marriage
and broke up with your first boyfriend.

If you still want to date guys, I get it.

Angie, just 'cause I'm bi doesn't mean
I can't commit.

Well, you couldn't with Bob or Coralee,
so...

Yeah, but that's totally different.

With them I always felt like something
was missing, but...

I don't feel like that with you.

Now.

What if that changes?

Do you still want to see other people?

It's okay.

You can say anything to me.

Don't get me wrong.

This is the happiest I've been since...

well, since the Dukes of Hazzard came out
on DVD,

and if there was anyone I would want
to commit to, it'd be you.

You're...

smart and weird...

And you're sexy as hell,

but I know myself,

and I just... I don't want to pretend
to be something I'm not.

Especially not with you.

Like I said, let's be open.

Exactly. Let's be open, and honest, and...

No, but...

Let's be in an open relationship.

You...

You'd do that for me?

Yeah, if that's what you feel like
you really need.

I've never had anyone willing to try that
for me before.

Well, there's a first time for everything.

Mm...

Wow.

The fact that you're willing...

to do that for me makes me...

not want to do it at all.

Tomorrow was the biggest day
of my life,

but I wasn't going to sleep.
Not with Stella Rose in the room.

Maybe I could sneak away
while Nonnie was sleeping.

If I could just get rid of Officer Greg.

Hey, did you want to go away for a minute?
Take a break, maybe have a snack?

No need. I have supplies.

Plus, I'm wearing a man diaper,

so I can go straight through
to the morning.

That's great.

Okay.

Did you really have to bring him along?

Well, I feel safer knowing he's around,

and I've been doing some more digging
about Christian.

It keeps getting weirder.

Really?

I downloaded all of his texts,

and look...

The way he texted totally changed
after he disappeared.

He started using full sentences,
proper punctuation.

He even used emojis.

It's super freaky.

I'm starting to think
maybe someone else had his phone.

Like who?

I don't know.

Can we please talk about something else?

I just need to relax before the pageant,
and I don't want to start eating.

Okay.

What do you want to talk about?

Uh... I don't care.

TV? Movies?

What about your mom and Bob?

I mean, that's got to be weird, huh?

No weirder than me sharing a room
with my best friend who wants to be a cop

and a body I couldn't get rid of.

I was just going to have to keep it

by my side until after the pageant.

My goodness,
this suitcase is heavy.

Do you really have to bring that
with you everywhere?

Yes.

What if someone spills something on me,

or I'm wearing the same thing
as someone else? I have to have options.

Okay, whatever you need.

Listen, we have a very busy schedule
today.

We start with today's meet and greet,

- and then we have a press junket.
- Patty!

Magnolia, what are you doing here?

- Competing.
- What? How?

A lot of state winners have backed out.

With the pageant k*ller still out there,
they're all too scared of getting k*lled.

And since my mom lives in Connecticut now,
I'm technically a resident,

so we wrote the board a check,

and now you're looking
at the new Miss Connecticut American Lady.

Wait, you're letting her compete?

After Roxy?

What? We're all thinking it.

Well, I tried to talk her out of it,

but last time I said no,
she blacked out for two days,

so figured the least
I could do is be here to keep her safe.

Brick's here, too.

- He's back in the room sleeping in.
- He is?

I wonder why he didn't tell me.

It was a last minute decision,
but I was very persuasive.

Holy sh*t!

Excuse me.

Was this another ghost?
I thought Heather Christina Pamela Kendell

Jackson-Johnson was dead.

What the hell?

I thought Heather Christina Pamela Kendell
Jackson-Johnson was dead.

Wait, you see her, too?

Of course, she's standing right there.

Heather Christina Pamela Kendell?

Pamela Kendell Heather Christina.

I'm Heather's evil twin.

Wait, Heather wasn't the evil one?

I'm competing to honor her memory.

We grew up in separate households.
I'm Miss California.

- And I'm coaching her.
- Gloria?

I spent the last year touring the country
looking for the best of the best.

And Pamela is it.

Formerly blind, currently blonde,

she's unstoppable.

I would have coached you, Patty,

back when I thought
you blew up those girls,

but then you got exonerated.

Too bad.

You could have been a real winner.

Yeah, okay.
Let's get you in this press line.

Seeing Gloria was a sign,

a reminder of what she had told me

at state,
that winning would erase my past.

Once I got the crown, I could get rid of

- Stella Rose and be reborn.
- ♪ I can feel it ♪

But I'd only ever won by default,
and Magnolia never lost.

My platform is animal mascot awareness.

I want to raise money to build a sanctuary
for retired animal mascots

like dogs and bulls and bulldogs.

Instead of being forced
to entertain people,

people can come and entertain them
because they deserve it.

Thank you.

And Pamela had the best coach
in the world.

My platform is organ donation.

I've donated a kidney,
a piece of my intestine,

my appendix, and a glass eye.

Thank you.

But really, you're welcome.

♪ I will lose control ♪

But by the skin of my teeth,
I made it through preliminaries...

...to the top 25.

To the top 15,

and then to the biggest night of all.

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.

I am your host, Brazen Moorehead,

and welcome
to the 47th Annual Miss American Lady.

And now, please welcome back to the stage
our top ten finalists

in this year's competition.

Miss Arkansas, Suzanne Juliette.

Miss California, Pamela Kendell Heather
Christina Jackson-Johnson.

Miss Georgia, Patty Bladell.

I can't believe you're out here
instead of backstage.

I know, but Patty insisted
she needed her space.

Miss Florida, Rene Hill.

Miss Connecticut, Magnolia Barnard.

Shouldn't you be guarding Patty?

No way. I've never been
to a Miss American Lady before.

I want to see the show.

And now, please welcome
all of our contestants

as they celebrate the strength and beauty
of the modern Miss American Lady.

♪ I got hips ♪

♪ I know how to move them ♪

♪ I also have a brain ♪

♪ My heart is b*ating loud, loud, loud
'cause I need you to know ♪

♪ That I'm a modern girl ♪

♪ And I'm ready for a modern world ♪

♪ Don't treat me, treat me like that ♪

♪ Modern girl ♪

I was nine girls away from making
all of my dreams come true,

and I wasn't gonna let anyone
get in my way.

Are you sure about that, Patty?

What if Bob finds me?

He won't. He's in the audience,
and I locked my dressing room door.

You can't hide the truth forever.

I could until after I won.

Dad, you should be out in the audience

where you can enjoy the show.

Oh, no. I will be in the wings
the entire time keeping watch.

I'm not taking any chances

with that pageant k*ller
still on the loose.

Whatever.
Brick, did you fix the latch?

I can't. It's still catching.
You sure this is the trick you want to do?

You've never done it without me
or in a straitjacket before.

- I just want to make sure you nail it.
- It'll be fine.

I'm just sorry you can't be on stage
with me.

I only got into this whole magic thing
because of you.

No, that's okay.

I actually think I may have found
my own thing.

I tried to do another

Good Guys video last night,

- but it didn't work out.
- It's lame.

Lame!

Lame, lame, lame.

I thought I turned the camera off,

but I guess I turned it on.

What were you doing?

Eating a cookie with my shirt off.

And it got, like, almost a million views,

and I've got cookie companies
already reaching out to sponsor me,

and other people asking me
to eat other stuff,

so it looks like
I might be an influencer after all.

That totally makes sense.

Magnolia, two minutes.

♪ Dance for the moment ♪

♪ Dance through the music ♪

♪ This is our day to shine ♪

Thank you, Patty Bladell,
for that impressive capoeira routine.

Up next, Miss Connecticut American Lady,
Magnolia Barnard.

Let's go, Mag!

Thank you.

I will now attempt a trick
inspired by Houdini.

The famous straitjacket trunk escape.

Oh, come on.

Help! Help me!

Help!

- Patty, what's happening?
- Do it now. She's seen us. You have to.

Do what? No!

Run!

- Patty...
- I'm a good person.

I'm a good person!

I'm good person!

I'm a good person!

I'm a good person. I'm a good person.

I'm a good person.

Way to go, Mag!

- Maggie, where are you going?
- Bathroom. Be right back.

And now, please welcome
Miss California American Lady,

Pamela Kendell Heather Christina
Jackson-Johnson.

Patty, there you are.

Hi. What are you guys doing back here?

We came back here to tell you
we're so proud of you.

And to be honest, it is driving me crazy
being out there in that audience

instead of back here with you.

What the hell?

No, no, no, no, no, no, no!

- Wait, what is going on?
- No! This can't be happening!

- No, not again!
- Patty, what are you looking for?

- Maybe we can help?
- f*ck! No, she was right here.

- Who?
- I...

Um...

Mom, can I please have a second
alone with Bob?

Why? There's nothing you can't say
in front of me.

Mom, please.

Patty, who was right here?

I can't.

Patty! Tell me what is going on right now!

Stella Rose.

- Stella Rose?
- Yeah.

Who the hell is Stella Rose?

She found me. She att*cked me.

I had to do it.

Had to do what?

Angie, you need to leave right now.

No!

Not until somebody tells me
what is going on.

Bob, please, I need your help!

I put her in that suitcase,
and then you packed it in the car,

and now she's gone again.

You had me drag a body across state lines?

I'm the Mayor!

Do you have any idea what this means?

A body? Like a dead body?

You promised me!
No more secrets. No more lies!

I know, but if I could just get the crown.

If you get the crown?
Where is she?

Patty, you k*lled someone else?

Someone else? What...

- Who is she talking about?
- Nobody.

- Mom...
- No.

This is my fault.

It's not.

Patty! Who is she talking about?

It was me, okay?

I am the one who k*lled
all those drug dealers.

The ones that we sunk in Gator Bog.

Oh, my God.

I didn't want to tell you

'cause I didn't want you thinking
that I was a m*rder*r.

Oh, but God, you are.

I mean, how many bodies is it?

What, four? Five?

Five?

Six.

I k*lled Gordy.

What?

Who the hell is Gordy?

The guy Patty thought was her dad.

How long have you been standing there?

Do you want to tell me why you sent me
the same emojis Christian sent his dad?

I... I must've seen them
on your laptop and...

Bullshit!

- Patty, we need to talk.
- Magnolia, please.

Right now is not a good time.

I remembered what happened with Christian.

I saw everything.

Oh, my God.

What happened with Christian?

Did you...

k*ll him?

Wait, how did you know?

Oh, God, there's another one.

No, you don't...

You don't understand. I had to.

I thought you were my best friend.

I am.

I trusted you.

Join the club.

How could you just lie to my face
like that?

How could I not?

Look at you.

Look at all of you.

The way that you're looking at me
now that you know the truth.

Tell me it's okay.

Tell me you understand and you get it.

You forgive me.

Tell me I'm still the same person.

I'm still your best friend.
I'm still your daughter.

Please... tell me.

Tell me you still love me, no matter what.

That's what I thought.

Patty, two minutes until the interview.

And up next, Miss Georgia American Lady,
Patty Bladell.

Patty Bladell, in your own words, tell us:

what does it mean to be a lady
in today's America?

I don't think I can be here.

Bob, please. I can't handle this alone.

Angie, there is a body out there.

I need you here. Please stay.

Being a lady...

means you have to lie.

They say the truth will set you free,

but there's no freedom.

Not when you're a lady.

You have to smile pretty

and hide every flaw
and pretend to be someone you're not.

Because nobody really wants the truth.

People don't want to know
who you really are,

how you feel,

what you've done.

They say they do,

but they just want the version of you

that they think you are.

Because the real you is...

too much...

and never enough.

Be the most you you can be.
It's such bullshit.

What if you're broken?

What if you're...

so tired of faking it that you feel sick?

What if you're so angry you're homicidal?

What if you're me?

This is who I am, America,

and I'm not a f*cking lady.

Speak it, sister!
You showed the real you!

f*ck being a motherfuckin' lady!

I'm homicidal, too!

Patty! Patty! Patty!

They love her.

So do I.

No matter what.

I wish I would have told her.
I need to tell her.

I need some air.

So do I.

Thank you.

And up next, Miss Connecticut
American Lady, Magnolia Barnard.

This was her chance
to take me out.

To k*ll her competition.

Magnolia, in your own words,

what does it mean to be a lady
in today's America?

All I can say is that...

Patty Bladell...

is one of the bravest women I've ever met.

She protected me when no one else would.

So if you ask me,

she's what it means to be a lady.

Thank you.

Thank you, Magnolia.

Now we'll take a quick commercial break.

I don't know what to say.

The same thing I'm gonna say...

nothing.

You saved my life,

so your secret...

is safe with me.

She was a k*ller,
and I had helped her.

What if I had let her turn herself in?
Would all those people have d*ed?

But maybe it wasn't too late
to do the right thing.

Ladies and gentlemen,
please take your seats.

We are ready to announce the winner.

This is an historic moment.

The judges came to their decision

in record time.

This is Bob Barnard.
You've got this.

Bob, call me back.

I found out who the father is.

♪ For the love that's like hating ♪

♪ For the pressure persuading ♪

♪ Get your mind up
on the grind up 'cause it's time... ♪

All of these women
on stage are strong, empowered.

Each of them will change our world.

Where's Pamela Kendell Heather Christina?

Who cares?
They're about to announce the winner.

Know that in the eyes of all America,

every single one of you are winners
for being here today.

But as we know,

there can only be one
to wear the crown.

So, here we go.

I hated Patty,
but I hated myself more

because after everything
that had happened,

I still needed to see if she won.

Maybe I was even crazier than her.

Regina! What the hell?

I thought you were my mortal enemy,
but now I think you're my soulmate.

Regina, will you get off me?

Stop it!

What are you doing?

- Help! Hey, somebody let me out!
- Shh. Oh, no, no.

No, honey. Don't bother. No.
There's a pageant going on.

No one can hear you.

Second Runner-Up:

Miss New York American Lady,
Debra Dinkess.

I found Stella Rose's body.

Salted, preserved.

- Oh, I was impressed by your work.
- I didn't do that.

Aw, honey, of course you did.

She's your ex.

And I have never been more turned on.

Our First Runner-Up:

Miss Connecticut American Lady,

Magnolia Barnard.

Thank you.

Bob, it's tragic, really.

If I'd known we were so much alike,

things could have been different.

But I was already so far down the road
with my plan...

What plan?

Well...

I put Stella Rose's body
in your hotel room.

The cops will find her there
when they search it,

but that was just a bonus.

- Wait, you called the cops?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Right now, the FBI is finding

a sick-ass serial k*ller stash
between your walls,

thanks to a tip courtesy of moi.

Oh, and get this, Bob.

They were so grateful,
they agreed not to press charges

against me for kidnapping Dixie.

What are you talking about? What stash?

Roxy's sash,

Heather's yo-yos,
expl*sives from the parade.

I saved it all and put them there
to frame you...

'cause you ruined my life.

Oh, my God. It's you.

You're the pageant k*ller?

No, honey. Try and keep up.

You are.

And the moment

you've all been waiting for.

The winner of this year's
Miss American Lady,

by unanimous decision:

Miss Georgia American Lady,
Patty Bladell!

Surprise, Bob! Look!

Oh, my God.

I did this! I did it! I did it for you!

Okay. Here, here, here.

Oh, help! Help! Oh!

- He's tryin' to k*ll me!
- Regina! Get back here.

Ladies and gentlemen, our new
Miss American Lady, Patty Bladell!

Help! Help me!

The pageant k*ller's trying to k*ll me!

- Help me!
- No!

No!

No, it's her!

She's the pageant k*ller!

She's the pageant k*ller!

She's...

I did it! I caught the pageant k*ller!

No, wait!

♪ So I can breathe and it will echo
Oh, no ♪

♪ Yeah, I'm a bad guy
Ain't no holding back guy ♪

♪ Come off like a mad guy ♪

♪ Always got your back guy ♪

♪ Yeah, I'm a real... ♪

Bob.

Hey.

How are you?
Are you okay?

This is pretty cool, right?

Private room.

No one listening in.

It's usually just reserved
for an attorney and a client.

Which used to be us.

But now...

I guess being Miss American Lady
has its privileges.

Look.

We're famous, like Drew Barrymore famous.

I already have TV producers calling.
They want to make a show about us.

You should be in here.

Not me.

I know.

It's... I'm gonna make this right.

How? Are you gonna turn yourself in?

I'm gonna prove that Regina
was the pageant k*ller

and that she set you up.

I'm gonna find her,

get a confession out of her,

pin Stella Rose on her,

and then take her out.

Take her out?

She deserves it.

Like Christian,

Gordy,

Stella Rose.

Oh, my God. You like it.

What?

k*lling.

You like it.

Was he right?

Did I like it?

Had I been lying to myself all along?

Maybe I wasn't a victim.

I was empowered.

That was the kind of lady I wanted to be.

And now that I had the crown,

nothing could get in my way.

Bob, maybe you're right.

Maybe I do like it.

Maybe that's why I couldn't stop eating.

I was pushing down the truth.

What truth?

Nothing tastes as good as k*lling feels.

Oh, my God!

Bob, thank you.

- This is amazing.
- I finally feel free.

I helped her to be the most her
she could be,

and who she was, was a monster.

I've got to go find Regina.

I'll let you know when it's done.

Patty.

It was fate.

Bob saved me,
and now it was my turn to save him.

Stop that woman! Guards!

I had to stop her.

I was the only one who could.

She was my destiny.

Patty!

♪ Welcome to the jungle
We got fun and games ♪

♪ We got everything you want
Honey, we know the names ♪

♪ We are the people that can find
whatever you may need ♪

♪ If you got the money
Honey, we got your disease ♪

♪ In the jungle, welcome to the jungle
Watch it bring you to your knees, knees ♪

♪ Oh, I wanna watch you bleed ♪

♪ Welcome to the jungle
We take it day by day ♪

♪ If you want it, you're gonna bleed
But it's the price to pay ♪

♪ And you're a very sexy girl
Very hard to please ♪

♪ You can taste the bright lights
But you won't get there for free ♪

♪ In the jungle, welcome to the jungle ♪

♪ Feel my, my, my serpentine ♪

♪ Uh, I, I want to hear you scream ♪

♪ Welcome to the jungle
It gets worse here every day ♪

♪ You learn to live like an animal
in the jungle where we play ♪

♪ If you got hunger for what you see
You'll take it eventually ♪

♪ You can have anything you want
But you better not take it from me ♪

♪ In the jungle, welcome to the jungle ♪

♪ Watch it bring you
to your knees, knees ♪

♪ I'm gonna watch you bleed ♪

♪ And when you're high
You never ever wanna come down ♪

♪ So down, so down, so down, yeah ♪
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