02x01 - Tortoise Trouble

[bunniefuu]

Whoo-hoo!

Don't worry, Tabby, we can do this.

Maud!

Enid!

Well met.

Wait for me!

Wait, Mil. Look out for the...

tree.

You nailed it!

Might have been practicing.

This year is gonna be
so different.

No more crash landings,
no more clumsy mistakes.

No more disasters.

This term is going to
be brilliaaaaaaaant!

My project!

Is it supposed to be able to fly?

No!

You go on without me!

Sorry, Ethel.

I think I'm just a bit nervous.

Of what?

Flying, falling off,
Ms. Hardbroom yelling at me.

Losing my powers like poor Esmerelda.

Sybil, you're a Hallow, aren't you?

Then you'll be absolutely fine.

I hope Millie hurries up.

- It's great to be back!
- In here. One minute.

Come on, girls, hurry up!

First day at Cackle's.
Think I'm gonna explode!

Please don't.
This uniform's brand-new.

- You're the funny one from selection day.
- Am I?

Well met. I'm...

Beatrice Bunch. Bea for short.

Clarice Twigg. Well met, Bea for short.

- Where do first-years go?
- This way.

On the left.

Here they come, the future of witchcraft.

I admire your positivity after last year.

Precisely.

We couldn't possibly have a debacle
like that again.

This term is going to be brilliant.

- Well met.
- Well met.

Ethel, that's mine!

Your project nearly took my head off!

Sorry. Let me help you up.

Now, you may recall
we had a few security issues last term.

Let me assure you all, however,

that every possible step has been taken
to ensure the school is 100 percent...

safe.

Just the whole school looking, then.

No big deal.

Welcome back, Mildred Hubble.

Shouldn't we do something to help?

Mildred's way beyond help.

She thinks she's come up with a spell
that makes animals talk.

Find your mistress.
There's a good broom.

Okay.

Come on.

Upside down, inside out,
scream and shout, get me out!

I am really sorry, Ms. Cackle.
My project flew off,

and then there was a tile loose
and I ended...

No harm done, Mildred.

Now, where was I?

Uh, yes, safety.

Felicity.

Well met.

We've clearly got some work to do
on the roof.

Apart from that, I'm certain you really
couldn't be more protected

than here at Cackle's.

The school just collapsed,

didn't it, Ms. Hardbroom?

I believe it did, Ms. Cackle.

I've used an extra strong binding spell
on the walls.

The rest of the school
isn't going anywhere.

Any idea what caused it?

I've just destroyed the school
in the first five minutes of term.

Don't flatter yourself.
You're nowhere near that powerful.

And it was only the east wing.

Here.

- Thanks for catching it.
- With your face.

Haven't even started my project.

Have to wing it.

I've researched this really crafty spell.

Took most of the holidays to get it
working. I'm proud.

Let's see.

No, I want to surprise you in class.
It'll be worth the wait, I promise.

Leftover bad magic from Agatha's
annihilation spell last term.

But we reversed it.

Traces were hidden deep in the walls.

The flagpole coming out
caused a chain reaction.

Thank goodness
for Mildred's aerial predicament.

Indeed. It could have spread through
the entire school if left unchecked.

We'll have to remove it, stone by stone.

We can't rebuild until it's gone.

Space will be tight for a while.

But we'll manage.

Keep calm and witch on.

Sybil Hallow? They've got us in with you.

Our bedrooms were annihilated.

Well met.

She's Clarice, I'm Beatrice.

- You can call me Bea.
- Call me Clarice.

She's weird, but nice. Don't worry.

You're head of Year One, aren't you?

- Congrats.
- Thanks.

Is Esmerelda Hallow your big sister?

You've heard about her?

People are saying she lost her magic.

She didn't lose it,

she was tricked into giving it away
and then she couldn't get it back.

Are you okay?

Just now my other sister got knocked
clean off her broom

and then the school fell down.

She's not okay.

This place is really scary.

Go home, then.

I can't. My mum's even scarier.

I guess I just have to stay here
and be brave.

I think I can help with that.

Hmm.

Don't reckon much to the view.

Shh!

Pets are banned, remember?

I have to hide you.

Not one more word
until I present my project.

No problemo.

Einstein.

Sorry! Last one.

Oh!

- That was another.
- Shh.

Sorry.

Everyone's talking about Esmerelda.

Is it true she's not magic anymore?

- Mother told us not to say anything.
- But she isn't coming back?

Not for now, no.

Must be strange,
especially with Drusilla changing schools.

I heard she's at Pentangle's now.

Really? She's so lucky.

I know, right?
Ms. Pentangle is everything.

Oh, no!

Oh, foaming frogspawn!

No!

- What?
- My holiday project for HB.

It's not here!

- Tell me how it happened again.
- Hide and seek with my cousin Henry.

Magical hide and seek is epic!

Which means things can go wrong.

I thought he'd never find me
with a different face.

I'm still me... underneath.

Obviously. I'd know you anywhere.

You didn't change anything
over the holidays?

No, I just went on a world tour
with Mum and Dad!

- Mm!
- It was like watching pondweed dry.

We visited the Natural Witchery Museum.

Very educational.

Followed by a broomstick water-skiing trip
over Niagara Falls.

- Nice.
- What about you?

Caravan holiday.

As in camels across the Sahara?

As in Wales across the A48.

Really?

- How did you get there?
- On a bus.

An actual bus?

Yep, just a normal actual bus.

That settles it.
Next break, we're staying with you.

My dad made it.
Helps boost your confidence.

Hallows aren't supposed
to need help with things.

Everyone does sometimes.

You didn't pack my project!

Hello, I'm Bea...

I told you to get the folder
next to Mum's cauldron

and put it in my trunk.

Can't your mum just transfer it?

Tell her we left it behind?
Are you insane?

Sybil, have you any idea

what HB's going do to me
when I turn up without my...

You left it behind.

Excuse me?

I packed it in your trunk.

You took it out again and you decided
my packing wasn't neat enough.

If you forgot it, that's your fault.

Did I really just say that?

Your father makes excellent potions.

So, you got off to a sticky start.

Sounds like your flying
was on point, though.

Enid and Maud were super impressed.

Told you all those hours
we put in would be worth it.

Thanks, Mum.

- And are you ready for your project?
- Can't wait.

I've made extra in case
people want to give it a try themselves.

Nobody's gonna be talking
about the school falling down, then.

You think?

Come on, Tabby.
You can get into the kitchen easy.

Go on, Tabby, be a sport.

Grab us a bit of cabbage.

Maybe a carrot.

No one would miss it.

Come on, Tabby.

Hello!

Got any food on you?

Oops.

Forget I said that, and that.

Mildred's spell.

It worked.

Uh-oh.

Wait, Maud, are you going first?

I don't know.

Are you?

- Aren't you worried about winging it?
- No.

Not being able to think of something
made me think of something.

Silence!

You will each present your project.

Marks are awarded for originality,
flair, and difficulty.

The highest-scoring witch
wins a prize of my choosing.

Begin.

Okay, so my project is all about...

How to get your brain fizzing
when you haven't got a clue.

Why just have one hair colour
when you can have every hair colour?

You simply sprinkle the potion
like this...

Tap your head like this.

Chant the words
at the top of your voice and...

A convenient portable broomstick
for any occasion.

You get the perfect idea every time.

Rainbow hair!

Next.

I'd like to share a very important
magical breakthrough,

which I, Ethel Hallow,
discovered during my extensive research

over the holidays.

Meet Cyril, everyone.

Pleased to make your acquaintance.

Wow!

That's amazing!

Glad I didn't miss this.

Nothing scary about getting a cat.

Nope, not one thing.

You have to be precise
with the talking equation.

- Ms. Hardbroom!
- No questions till Ethel's finished.

Once you've worked out
the potion-to-surface-area ratio, however,

it should work on almost any small animal.

Don't see why not.

Ms. Hardbroom!

That really is a fascinating discovery,
Ethel.

- Ms. Hardbroom!
- Yes, Mildred?

That's my spell!

Bea vanished into thin air.

I'm not afraid of that.
Witches vanish all the time.

Not first-years, though.

- So you're scared now?
- I just think we should go and find her.

Ethel must have stolen it!
I can prove it, Ms. Hardbroom. Look!

I had hoped
you'd be taking this year seriously.

Clearly, some things never change.

But there was a whole project in there.
I swear it!

And I made Einstein talk.
He'll tell you himself!

She stole my tortoise, too.

You brought a pet tortoise to school?
Isn't that against the rules?

Mildred Hubble,
if this is an attempt

to cover up the fact
that you haven't done the work...

I did it. I promise.

And Einstein wasn't a pet,
he was part of my project.

Mildred.

Cast the spell. Prove it.

Perhaps if I could show you...

Pitter-patter, chitter-chatter,
oink or gobble, wink and natter,

croak me out, bark or tweet,
you were silent, now you speak!

Oh, I wish they'd
keep the noise down.

I was having a snooze.

Sid, I think they heard you.

No, they didn't.

We did, actually.

Wow, hello.
Could you let me out of this jar, please?

Yes! What she said.

Save us from HB. She's a monster!

Bea!

Bea, come out, wherever you are!

- Bea!
- Hello!

Hello down there!

Help!

Hello?

I think I've been kidnapped!

Any chance you could get me down?

Okay, Einstein was never that loud.

I'm not sure what went wrong.

You used magic in anger.

That's what went wrong.

Sorry, Ms. Hardbroom.

However, you have proven yourself...

as the girl who attempted
to copy Ethel's project.

Ms. Cackle will decide
what to do with you.

No offense,
but you look a little unbalanced.

I'm a first-year.

Still learning.

Ooh! Careful.

Hello.

Hello.

Oh, you found us.

It was supposed to be
the other way around.

I heard you looking,
but I was embarrassed.

I've got... asthma.

It transfers me around sometimes
when it gets bad.

- What's she doing up there?
- Just rescuing a tortoise.

She's fearless now, thanks to you.

Cheating is a very serious allegation.

I swear on Tabby's life, I didn't do it.

We shall have to talk to both of you,
see if we can't get to the bottom of it.

Come on.

Well, knock me down with a lily pad!

Whatever did you land on?

Mildred?

For the most imaginative
and unusual holiday project,

I declare Ethel Hallow the winner.

Congratulations.

This is so unfair.

What are we gonna do?

We need to find that tortoise.

I never thought I'd see the day.

What is it, Ms. Cackle?

Something very special indeed!

- Do you disappear every time you sneeze?
- Yes, unfortunately.

Well, we covered for you.

Broomsticks crossed, no one missed us.

But what if it happens again?

You can't just keep disappearing
at the drop of a hat.

Hand it over.

What?

You know what. We used a tracking spell.

I think she means me.

Busted tortoise-handed.

Oh, dear.

Ms. Cackle!

What's happened now?

They found something awesome
in the ruins.

So the second-years hate us now.

For helping a defenceless animal?

They might think
I was in on it with Ethel.

But you weren't.

Can I have some more
of your confidence potion?

Actually, I made that.

Really? What was in it?

Water.

Magic water?

No, just water-water.

I stood up to my sister.

Yep.

I flew to the top of the tallest tree
I've... ever seen.

Yes, and you didn't need magic
to do any of it.

You did it all by yourself.

Isn't that amazing?

- No.
- No?

No, it's not amazing, it's petrifying.

I... I could have been seriously hurt.

Come closer, everyone!

That's it!

I'd like to present to you all...

the founding stone of the school.

Set down
by the first Ms. Cackle centuries ago,

when the school was built.

It's what makes a magical school magical.

The collapse revealed it.

No living person has ever seen one before!

Doesn't look all that to me.

This stone is a source of great power
and it deserves your respect.

Who said that?

Um, I did.

Maud Spellbody, is that a tortoise?

Yes, Ms. Hardbroom.

A talking one.

She snatched me from under the bed,

used a spell to copy Mildred's project,

and dumped it in the kitchen bin.

Then she flew out to the woods
and hid me in a tree.

Is this true?

No, Ms. Hardbroom.
And you can't take his word for it.

- He's a tortoise.
- You do have a point.

Which is why we're going to pay
a visit to the bins.

Keep looking, Ethel.

You're going to turn over
every old teabag and fish skin

- until we have a definitive answer.
- I can see it, right at the back.

- Look!
- There!

There it is!
I can tell from the green ink.

I'm sorry.

I did my own and it was excellent,
but I forgot it.

I didn't want my mother to find out
because she's been so worried about Esme.

We have a zero-tolerance approach
to plagiarism.

Rest assured
she will be punished, Mildred.

How many lines?

Two hundred and fifty thousand,
to start off with.

- You made him speak.
- Chop, chop!

"I must not steal other people's ideas."

Best handwriting. Begin.

You should have seen Ethel.

Covered in bin juice,
face like she'd eaten mouldy porridge.

Toadstools in crow saliva.

Use them sparingly.

I won?

I remarked the holiday projects

in light of recent events.

So, yes, you are now...

the winner.

- Yes!
- Do not let it go to your head.

We're so proud of you, Mil!

I'm just proud of Einstein.

Shame he has to go home.

I think I'll like it better there.

This school is a bit too exciting for me.

But have a brilliant term, Mildred.

You know what? I think I might.