01x05 - Pond Life

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "The Worst Witch". Aired: 11 January 2017 – 20 April 2020.*
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Mildred Hubble, a normal girl from a world outside of magic, finds herself at Miss Cackle's Academy for witches.
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01x05 - Pond Life

Post by bunniefuu »

Hello! Hello.

Welcome.

Well met! Hi, Mum.

Yes, I'm here.

The transference spell worked perfectly.

Don't worry, I'm fine.

Love you, too! What?

My phone! Why'd you do that?

Such devices are not permitted here.

But I promised Mum I'd call her all the time.

You are here on a trial basis.

Frankly, I will be amazed if you last until the end of the week.

Maud! Agh! Sorry! Sorry! Sorry for charging into me like a clumsy hippo?

Or sorry for sabotaging my entrance exam?

It was an accident, both times.

- Maud.

- Mildred! Did your mum knit that scarf?

Yes.

Why?

House sashes.

Uh, the color shows you which corridor your rooms are.

Oh, we're not together.

Sorry, HB decides who goes where.



- But see your sash?



- Yeah.

What does it mean?

It means you came top in the entrance exam and so you're head of Year One.

Top?

To be slightly more accurate, you were the least worst

- but yes.



- Well done, Maud! Enough.

It's time you were assigned your familiars.



- Familiars?



- Our cats! Maud Spellbody.

As head of year, you may have first choice.

Choose wisely, dear.

I choose this one.

I name him Midnight.

Oh, good name.

Well done, Maud.

Oh, he's so cute! Oh, his tail's just so soft.

Hurry up.

And last but not least Mildred Hubble.

Um Um Miss Cackle.



- Hurry up, Mildred.



- But there are no cats left! It's OK, Hecate, I've got him.

Caught this little fella making a run for it.

Here you go! But but he's He's not He's he's tabby.

Tabby! Not a traditional name, but it'll do.

Uh, no, I didn't mean Miss Cackle, please, can't I have a black one like the others?

Mildred, you have named Tabby, and now he is yours.

I'm sorry, Tabby.

It's not your fault.

I know he isn't what you expected, but it's a foolish witch who judges by appearances.

Hmm?

There you are working already.



- I don't want to get behind.



- It's your first day.

Why don't you just chill a bit?

Scared of the competition?

Sorry, what?

I should have smashed that entrance exam, broken your record into a million pieces, if it wasn't for Mildred Hubble.

Ethie, it was an accident, nobody's fault.

Why are you defending Mildred?

Did you put her up to it?

Me?

Why would I 'Cause you couldn't stand to let me b*at you.

For once, I'd be the favorite.

I'd have been given Granny Hallow's broomstick.

It's just because I'm older.

It's been passed down to the eldest daughter for 13 generations.

Exactly.

It's always been all about you.

I'm sorry you feel like that, but it's not fair to take it out on Mildred.

Well, life isn't fair.

If it was, I'd be the eldest.

I'd have everything you've got.

Now please, let me get on with my work.

Our first flying lesson and it's with Miss Hardbroom.

I can't do this in front of her.

I'll mess up and fail my trial.

You've already flown, remember?

Some girls haven't even been on a broomstick yet.

Sorry I'm late! Sorry! Sorry, Miss Hardbroom.

Sorry.

Right! Brooms on the ground, group one.

Now, say it with me, nice and loud: "Hover.

" Hover!

- Perfect.



- Yes, I did it! I did it! I did it.

Hover! Hover! What's wrong with it?

Nothing! You just need to be firmer, show that broom who's boss! Come on, girl, give it all you've got! Hover! Well, you're getting there.

Right, time to get flying.

Excellent, Ethel.

Beautiful posture, both you and the cat.

Girls, I want you all to copy Ethel.

May I fly now, Miss Drill?

Yes, yes, off you pop.

Pointy work, Ethel.

Now, girls, you all saw what Ethel did.

Give the broom a good sharp tap and away you go.

Go! Go, go, go!

- Mildred Hubble!

- It's Tabby.



- Come on, girl, get up there!

- He really, really doesn't want to.

Don't give me excuses, give me height! Hey!

- Maud! Stop!

- Sorry, Ethel, I didn't mean to.

Are the cats OK?

They're back in your rooms, you foolish girls.

This is what happens when we get sloppy.

There will be a special test on basic broomstick skills at the end of the week for girls and cats.

Failure will incur consequences, and I think you know what they are.

But, please, Miss Hardbroom, I can't, not by the end of the week.

Tabby gets so scared.

Do you know what a witch is, Mildred Hubble?

Do you know what a witch does?

Uh, spells?

Broomstick flying.

Wears a pointy hat?

A witch takes responsibility.

A witch does not whine when things don't go her way.

A witch makes things go her way.

Class dismissed.

Don't worry, we'll teach him.

Encourage him.

That's it, Midnight.

Coochy

- coochy

- coochy Um I can't do this.

Come on, Tabby.

Please.

Face it, Maud, she's a lost cause.

She's my best friend.

Remember what I said about Mildred.

She's worked so hard, she deserves a chance.

I know.

OK.

And actually, I was going to help her train her cat.

You're going to help her?

You sound surprised.

You always did underestimate me.

A test in the first week?

We need to eliminate the weak links.



- You mean Mildred Hubble?



- The sooner the better.

We must consider the best interests of the school.

And when did I ever fail to do that?

I know you think I was too soft on Agatha, but she's my sister.

Who tried to take over your school.

It's only my school because I'm the oldest.

If things had been different, do you think I think we have quite enough to worry about without speculating about what might have been.

Millie, listen.

It's not fair that you've got Tabby.

You've only just started flying lessons.

And I've had loads of practice, so why don't we swap cats?

I couldn't do that.

But maybe I could borrow Midnight for a bit?

Just so he can show Tabby how it's done.

Ada, you're finally speaking to me then.

How are you, Agatha?

Oh, terrible.

Every day, mother goes on and on about what a bad daughter I am and how I've let her down.

It's like being a kid again.

Our childhood wasn't that bad.

Yours wasn't, but then, you're the good one, the nice one.

And whose fault is that?

Oh, it's so easy to be the nice one when everything goes your way but if I were the oldest, you'd be stuck here instead of me.

You made your bed, Agatha.

I know, and I'm sorry.

I deserve to be punished.

You've taken away my powers.

But please you can't keep me here forever.

Just stay on the broom.

Look how Midnight does it.

Come on, Tabs, you can do it! Come on, Tabs.

Come in.

What an interesting room.

Did you know they used to use it to store junk?

Yeah, I'm sure you've got loads of jokes about that, but I'm a bit busy right now.

I know.

I've come to help.

Sardines.

It's an old witches' trick.

Pour some of this on your broomstick.

It'll help him get over his fear.

He's a lovely cat, really, such a nice shiny coat.

He can't help the stripes, can you, Tabby?

Why are you doing this?

You don't even like me.

I know we got off to a bad start, but I'd hate to see you kicked out on your very first week.



- So would I.



- Good luck tomorrow.

Um You too.

I think she's less scary when she's mean.

Tabby?

Tabby! Oh, hi, Midnight.

Have you seen Tabby?

There you are, I thought I'd lost you.

Look, I know how you feel, but running away won't help.

We have to pass this test.

Good side

-saddle position.

Cat keeping his balance perfectly.

You can do it.

Ooh, and that's some lovely cornering.

And a perfect dismount.

A nine for a first

- year?

I hope you aren't going soft.

Next! Take off! Yes! Let's see a sun

- wise circle, please, Mildred.

Hold on, Tabby.

And turn.

And widdershins! And land.



- We passed!

- Barely.



- We passed! We passed!

- Wow, Mildred, you did it.

You're the bats!

- That means good.



- I'm the bats! Maud Spellbody.

You're next.

Take off! No, Midnight, stay back! No, Midnight, I can't see where we're going! We're going to It really is very disappointing, Maud.

I hope being head of year hasn't gone to your head.

It wasn't Maud's fault, it was her cat.

Funny, he's never done that before.

No, he hasn't.

Why does Maud's cat like you so much, Mildred?

I don't know! Tabby, is that you?

Midnight.

Somebody switched our cats.

So they did.

Incompetence is one thing, but blatant cheating is much worse.

Me?

You think I did this?

There is no place for an untrustworthy witch in my school.

Your trial is over.

Go to your room and pack.

Tabby you have to get out.

Sorry.

This is my fault.

I should have known it wasn't you.

No wonder Maud doesn't believe me.

I'm sorry, but I had to see you.

I had to tell you.

What?

I didn't switch the cats, I promise.

I would never do that to you.

If I had to choose between being a witch and being your friend, I'd choose you every time.

That's OK.

I believe you.

Really?

Yeah.

That spell was a bit advanced for you.

And anyway, I offered to swap, so if you had wanted to, you could have just said yes.

So somebody else must have done it.

No prizes for guessing who.

Ethel?

But she was nice to me yesterday! Well, that definitely counts as suspicious behavior.

Now we need to prove it.

Come on, Maud.

Shh.

What are we looking for, exactly?

Evidence.

Potions, ingredients, spells.

Shh! Tabby! Leave it.

I think he's found something.

What is it?

An old sardine tin.



- That's it!

- Careful.

Sorry.

If Ethel put a spell on our cats, she'd have to trick them with something they couldn't resist.

You think she put a spell on the sardines?

It's evidence.

We can take it to Miss Cackle.

But what if it's just sardines?

Well, there's only one way to find out.

There's still some juice left.

I'll do it.

You're in enough trouble as it is.



- But if I'm going to be expelled anyway

- Let's both do it.

One, two, three I don't feel anything.

Ah.

Oh, it's OK.

Don't panic.

Little light, shine bright! Mildred?

Maud?

Is Is that you?

Is that me?

I'm you and you're me.

This is so weird.



- Don't chew my hair.



- Sorry! Mildred Hubble, I forbade you to leave your room but I might've known I'd find you here.



- But, Miss Hardbroom

- Don't interrupt me.



- What have you done with her?



- Sent her to her room.

A binding spell will hold her there until the morning, when she will be expelled.



- But it's not Mildred.



- Don't make excuses for her.

You are confined to your room until the morning and then I hope you will make better friends.

Hello.

What do you want?

Mildred, it's time to go.

You haven't even packed.

And what are you doing with Maud's spectacles?

I need those, I can't see.

Stop play

- acting, Mildred Hubble.

Why do you hate Mildred so much?

She can't help who her parents are.

I don't hate you, you silly girl, but this is no place for you.

And I don't want to see you drag Maud Spellbody down with you.



- Maud Spellbody?



- Yes, Miss Cackle?

As I thought.

This notebook contains a list of ingredients for a switching spell.

Whose handwriting is this?

Ethel Hallow's.

That's what I've been trying to tell you.

Ethel this is your notebook.

Did you switch the appearance of the cats?

Yes.

Such a dangerous and reckless misuse of magic put the whole school at risk.

I can think of only one course of action.

Yes?

I heard what happened.

Please don't expel Ethel.

I'm sure she wouldn't There must be some mistake.

No, there's no mistake.

I did it.

But only to help Mildred.

What?

Help her?

Yes.

You see, I knew she'd never pass the test with Tabby, so I'm really sorry.

I meant it for the best.

She's lying! She doesn't even like Mildred.

No, no she's not.

Yesterday, Ethel told me she was gonna help Mildred with Tabby.

Esmerelda, is this the truth?

You're not just saying this because Ethel's your sister?

It's true, I swear by the code.

Why would you help Mildred Hubble?

She ruined your entrance exam.

She did, but I was wrong.

She made a mistake.

She deserves a second chance.

People can change.

Look at me, I've changed.

She has.

She really has.

All right.

Ethel, you are forgiven this time.

Yes, Miss Cackle.

As for you, Mildred, your trial will continue if you want it to.

Yes, Miss Cackle.

But that cat must learn to fly.

It's our rule.

Yes, Miss Hardbroom.

It's not exactly elegant.

But the cat is flying on the broomstick.

You can't deny that.

Admit it, Hecate, Mildred's been rather clever.

Clever, maybe.

But that's not enough to make her a witch.
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