01x13 - The Worst Headmistress

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "The Worst Witch". Aired: 11 January 2017 – 20 April 2020.*
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Mildred Hubble, a normal girl from a world outside of magic, finds herself at Miss Cackle's Academy for witches.
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01x13 - The Worst Headmistress

Post by bunniefuu »

It's your birth scroll.

There's something you need to know.

This knowledge could endanger the entire school.

Somehow, Agatha managed to escape the enchantments that bound her to Darkwood Cottage.

They lied to her all her life.



- Esmerelda, what have you done?



- I think you might want to see this.



- I shall transfer you home.



- Maud! Please pick up, Millie.

Please.

Please?

Banished be.

Why don't you just talk to her?

She got me expelled.

Well, perhaps she wants to say sorry.

It's a bit late for that.

It'll get easier, love, I promise.

Flappy! Oh! Detector spell?

Yes, it will alert us to any unauthorized magic.

The spell has been applied to everyone on the premises.

It's an important health and safety measure, isn't it, Flappy?

Talking of health and safety, what about Miss Drill?

Oh, that was just one of my little jokes.

Dimity! Are you all right?

I think so.

But where's Miss Cackle?

When the truth came out she ran away rather than face the consequences of her crimes.

What truth?

As the elder daughter, Agatha is the legitimate headmistress.

We must accept that.

After all, only the Great Wizard can rewrite the Witches' Code.

So he can, jammy old toad.

So, I'd better get on with running my school.

This place will never be yours.

A school isn't bricks and mortar.

A school is its students, and the girls will never accept you.

Oh, I'm sure they'll like me, once they get to know me.

"And so, in conclusion, today we hail a glorious new dawn for this academy.

Wait for applause.

" "Get some life into it, Gullett, you're about as inspiring as a dead frog.

" Just bring me on.

Please give a warm Cackle's welcome for our new headmistress! Girls, girls, girls.

I am so sorry about everything that you've been through.

How you have suffered under the regime of that impostor, my sister.

Horrible food, constant tests, endless boring chanting lessons.

Well, that's all going to change.

Check your maglets for your new timetables.

As you'll see, I've added three extra break times per week.

What about their exams?

They need to revise.

Wrong.

I'll be issuing remembering powder to all of you.

But they'll forget everything as soon as the spell wears off.

Why do you care?

You're not even a witch anymore.

That's right.

Listen to your new head girl.

You've been practicing.

I haven't.

Oh, sorry, Mrs.

Roberts! You'll have to stop.

I can't! You've beaten the computer! I didn't even know you could do that! Me neither.

Was that, you know, M

- A

- G

- I

- C?

I don't know.

Mildred got expelled.

Tell us where she is, or I'll turn you into a dung beetle.

Or a head louse.

Or a toilet brush.

What was that?

Naughty, naughty, you used unauthorized spells.

Discovery and transference, to be precise.

Sorry, force of habit.

I was looking for Maud.

They were going to turn me into a toilet brush! I'm sure that won't be necessary.

Maud is a good girl who respects authority.

You will set an example to the others, won't you?

Yes.

Sorry, Miss Cackle.

That's all right, dear.

Run along now.

And you should return to your duties.

I didn't authorize a transference spell.

Indeed not.

Can she see us in there?

Oh, yes.

She can see, hear, think and feel.

Can't you, sister?



- That picture's always been there.



- But it never moved before.

So Miss Cackle didn't run away.

No.

Agatha trapped her in the picture.

And it's all my fault.



- You didn't know.



- But I let Agatha in.

I have to do something to save Miss Cackle.

It's OK.

Miss Cackle summoned the Great Wizard, remember?

When he gets here, he'll sort everything out.

Yes.

He will.

He's coming today.

Thanks to us, the school's in chaos.

Miss Cackle's trapped in a painting.

We are in big trouble.

You're right.

What are we gonna do?

There's only one thing we can.

Tell the truth and say sorry.

I summon Miss Gullett.

Ethel! You know you're not supposed It's an emergency! The Great Wizard's on his way! What?

So you better let Miss Cackle go and put this school back to normal.

Are you telling me what to do, mistress bossy drawers?

I'm just saying you don't have a choice.

Esmerelda Hallow, your sort make me sick! You're all jolly broomsticks and team spirit and shiny trophies! Esme?

Better put it somewhere safe.

An annihilation spell?

If the Great Wizard tries to take my school, every atom of it will be destroyed.

If I can't have this place, no one can.

You shouldn't have interfered.

Agatha's the rightful headmistress, because she's the older sister.

All right.

You win.

I'm sorry.

Tabby! How did you get here?

What's this?

A message.

From Ethel.

Ooh, look, he's here! Oh, hurry, my love.

It's OK, the Great Wizard will sort everything out.

Let's hope so.

Wait, Your Greatness, we must warn you! Agatha's taken over! She thinks she's headmistress now.

Headmistress?

I think I can deal with one power

-crazed middle

-aged witch, thank you, Algernon.

A little bat told me you were telling tales.

Oh! Oh! Oh, don't worry, my dear.

You get used to it.

Let's hope the cats don't get you, eh?

Ha! It's OK.

It's OK.

We've got you.

Agatha's taken over.

I need to go back and help.

Unless Ethel's lying.

What do I do?

So you see, I am the elder daughter.

Yes, and I am the Great Wizard.

You can't do that.



- The code!

- I am the code.

I can rewrite it, every line.

Now, before I decide what your punishment will be, where is your sister?

I was afraid you might ask me that.

You plan to use magic against me?

You have the second

- hand powers of a teenage girl, and I am twice as strong as any mere witch.

But not as strong as three.

I am truly sorry, Your Greatness.

Hecate Hardbroom, why?

She was going to destroy the school.

I've got the perfect punishment for you.

Oh very good, Agatha.

I'll just pop you over there.

Sorry, bad choice of words.

I'm sure the Great Wizard will do something.

Do what?

He's been here for hours and nothing's happened.

Agatha's got him, too, hasn't she?



- What is it?



- Good news, girls.

You are invited to an end

-of

-term feast in the Great Hall.

We need to get that picture and save Miss Cackle.

Let's hope Ethel's telling the truth.

Come on, Ethel.

You need to be invited in, remember?

Go on, then.

Never thought I'd say this, but well met and welcome, Mildred Hubble.

Well met.

It's in here.



- Where?



- There.

It's gone.

You lied to me.

Was this whole thing a set

- up?

No.

I promise.

Mildred?

Is that you?

Maud.

Where are you?

Here.

I'm invisible.

I can see that.

Well I can't.

I mean Oh, just come here, you silly slug.

I'm sorry I didn't answer the mirror.

I'm sorry I got you expelled.

I was just trying to keep you safe.

More importantly, what are you two doing in here?

Well, we thought that if we could get the painting out of the school then maybe someone It isn't what it looks like.

Trying to steal school property, eh?

We didn't It wasn't me.

Well, that's too bad.

Because I think you've all seen a little bit too much.

What are you going to do?

Expel us?

Of course not.

I'd hate you to miss the end

- of

- term celebrations! No.

The spell's wearing off.

Mildred Hubble!

- I thought you were

- I I came back.

Ethel, Maud and Enid, Miss Gullett turned them into cakes.



- Cakes?

Stop that.



- Yes.

Only Miss Cackle can help them now.

And unfortunately only you can help Miss Cackle.

Enjoy, girls.

More cakes?

Miss Gullett, you are spoiling us.

They do look delicious.

By all we see and all we are, I summon you from realms afar.

Did did I say it wrong?

It's not your fault.

You're too young.

A witch's power increases every year.

I just hoped So what do we do now?

You need to go home.

Be safe, Mildred Hubble.



- But what are you

- I said go.

Go.

Thank you.

Stop! Mildred Hubble! By all that I see and all that we are I summon you, Ada, from realms afar.



- Who is it?



- Hardbroom.

Office! We'll deal with you later.

No! Mildred, I was going to eat that.

Well, don't.

Those aren't cakes.

They're your friends.

Oh, they're such good friends.

I think they should be together Forever.



- How do we get them back?



- Don't tell me, I know this one.

So do I.

I've heard it.

Each to her own, let the truth be shown.

Each to her own, let the truth be shown.

I nearly ate you.

Who did this?

Oh, no.

She did.

And she trapped Miss Cackle in the painting.

And turned the Great Wizard into a balloon, don't forget that.

My methods are a tad unorthodox but the Witches' Code says I am headmistress.

And there's nothing any of you can do about it.

Yes, there is.

Hands up who wants Agatha in charge.

And hands up who wants to get Miss Cackle back.

If you don't leave, we all will.

You can't.

Without us, you have nothing to be headmistress of.

All right.

Well, I'll be on my way, then.

You're You're actually going?

I always dreamed of running this place.

But a school consists of people, not bricks and mortar.

So, it doesn't really matter if I do this.

Bricks and stone, beams and slate, all must fall, annihilate! Oh, what's she doing?

What's she doing?

Make it last, hold it fast! You stopped Agatha's spell?

No, just containing it! When my strength runs out, the whole place falls! Till we meet again, Mildred Hubble.

Get out, now! Esmerelda!

- Run, Millie!

- Come on! Keep moving! We aren't many we are one.

Annihilate! We aren't many, we are one.

We aren't many, we are one.

We aren't many, we are one! We aren't many, we are one! We aren't many, we are one! We aren't many, we are one! We aren't many, we are one! We aren't many, we are one! We aren't many, we are one! We aren't many, we are one! We aren't many, we are one! We aren't many, we are one! Agatha's spell shall be undone! Agatha's spell shall be undone! Miss Cackle.

Miss Hardbroom.

I am truly sorry, Your Greatness.

I suppose there's no real harm done.

Thanks to Mildred.

It wasn't me.

It was all of us.

We just well, I don't really know.

But I don't think we could do it again.

You won't have to.

Let me go, please! I promise I'll leave your school alone.

Yes, you will.

Ada, please.

I'm your sister.

Yes, you are.

But my girls come first.

Ohhh I'm sorry, Agatha.

You did the right thing.

Yes.

For all her faults, she loved this place.

Hm.

Now she will never leave it.

Now how are the First Years doing in their exams?

I can't believe they're still making her do this.

I can't believe they gave her a new broom.

Look at the way she sits on it, like a sack of rotten pumpkins.

Keep going, Millie, you crafty crow! Millie! Whoa! I'm fine.

You slammed into a tree and ruined a very expensive new broomstick.

Most examiners would fail you for this.

I, however, am not most examiners.

So, averaging this mark with your written papers gives you a final mark of 51 percent, which means you have passed.

Just.

See you next year! Whoo

-hoo!

- Bye, Millie!

- Bye!
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