06x11 - Ruthless, Toothless and a Week of Bed Rest

[bunniefuu]

Previously on Young Sheldon...

Your friends all know about

- your "secret boyfriend"?
- You think that's you?

Well...

It's not?

I understand you're moving forward

with Sheldon's grant database.

I was an intrinsic part of that.

Sheldon didn't mention you.

Of course he didn't, that
pint-sized little credit hog.

We're looking for a financier,
not a partner.

I just want to be around the process.

But I'm still in charge, right?

- Did NASA fake the moon landing?
- No.

See, that's what I thought
until about a year ago.

Oh, we're gonna have so much fun.

So the data comes in here,

and then it's divided into three tables

that I'm calling X-sub- ,
X-sub- , X-sub- .

Good, good.

And then over here, it's
subjected to data normalization,

so we don't end up with
any duplicate data fields.

GARY (OVER SPEAKER): I've got it.

Grant Daddy.

What?

The name of our company:

Grant Daddy.

I mean, it's sexy and sophisticated,

but still John Q. Lunchpail
can wrap his arms around it.

Where are you?

Oh, you know, my lawyers
have advised me not to say,

but I'm pretty sure I'll be
allowed back in the country

very soon.

Taxes, am I right?

Huh.

Right now we have more
important things to focus on

than the name, like how
are we going to build this.

Grant-opolis.

Grant-cano.

No, wait.

The Grant Canyon.

Oh, that's gonna
look great on a T-shirt.

Hey, what size do you guys wear?

This is not helpful.
Can't I hang up on him?

Sheldon, I have to remind you

- GARY: Hello?
- he's funding the entire project.

He should remain included.

- Hello?
- Fine.

The Grant Canyon is a terrible name.

It sounds like a place grants go to die.

Sheldon.

I'm including him.

♪ Nobody else is stronger than I am ♪

♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪

♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪

♪ I am a mighty little man ♪

♪ I am a mighty little man. ♪

So, how are you feeling?

Fat and disgusting.

I mean, are you having
any discomfort, fatigue?

Yeah, that's all I have.

I think what she's saying is
she feels eight months pregnant.

Eight. .

Hey, sorry I'm late.

Just a reminder, Doc,

I don't want to know
if it's a boy or girl.

- I want it to be a surprise.
- Wait, hold up.

If we're all here,

who's looking after the
Laundromat and the video store

and the, uh, other establishment?

Oh, the gambling room?

Huh?

It's okay. I lost a hundred
bucks there last week.

Oh. (CHUCKLES)

Then you know we're good for the bill.

Okay, uh, back to me.

Uh, how's everything
looking in the oven?

Well, baby seems okay,

but I am concerned about
your blood pressure.

Mm. You think it's preeclampsia?

Georgie, let the doctor talk.

Actually, that's a possibility.

I read the book. Did you?

NICHOLSON: I'd like to put you on

bed rest for a week
and then recheck you.

Is that really necessary?

It is.

Dr. Linkletter, I had a question
about today's lecture.

I'm sorry, who are you?

You must be Sheldon.

I am.

I was told not to talk to you.

Why not?

I was told not to tell you that.

Ah, I see you've met Toby.

I have not. He wouldn't
tell me his name.

Good man. What can I help
you with, Sheldon?

What's all this?

It looks like algorithms
for a searchable database.

At a glance, anything can look like

an algorithm for a searchable database.

Very well, it's an algorithm
for a searchable database.

That was my idea.

If you'll recall, it was our idea.

Are you programming a database for him?

- Go ahead.
- Yeah.

Yeah.

How dare you steal my
grant database idea?

Look, Dr. Linkletter
was part of the idea,

he's an employee of the university,

and therefore we have
a legitimate claim to it.

But I'm already making one.

I have an investor
lined up and everything.

Well, you're still more
than welcome to join us,

and we can all work on it together.

No, this is my idea, and
I'm doing it on my own.

Well, then I guess we'll see
who gets to market first.

I guess we will.

Hmm. So, have you already
started programming?

No.

Do you have access to a mainframe?

That depends. Can I use
the university's mainframe?

- No.
- Then we're still figuring it out.

I see.

Well, we already have a name, do you?

As a matter of fact, we do.
We're calling it Granted.

- Ugh, that is such a good name.
- Thank you.

And what's yours?

Never mind.

WOMAN: Hey.

Look what your machine
did to my underwear.

Made 'em huge?

It dyed 'em pink.

Oh, right.

Here. Next wash is on us.

I got to go check on
something in the back.

Sorry, I'm a little short-staffed today.

I've been running around like
a chicken with its head cut off.

All right.

There's your teddy bear.

Here's your cash.

Teddy bear. Cash.

Teddy bear.

Hey, this is a dry cleaning ticket.

Get out of here.

- Punk.
- (SIGN CHIMING)

Hang on, I'll be right back.

Hey, you find everything all right?

Yeah.

Oh, that there's a real good one.

You should get it. I'll ring it up.

I don't know.

Don't know? Whoopi Goldberg
as a singing nun?

What's there to think about?

I might be more in the mood for action.

She's on the run from the mob.

You'll love it. I'll ring it up.

How you doing?

Uh, well, I'm lying in bed and a
nice lady just brought me food.

It's not the worst.

Well, you haven't tasted it yet.
Doctor said no salt.

Oh, I'm sure it's great.

I tasted it. It sucks.

Anyway, I better go give Georgie a hand.

Um, here's your telephone.

Anything else you need before I go?

Actually, I can't find the remote.

Oh, well, it couldn't have gone far.

Let's see.

Let me just look right down here.

Okay. Here it is.

Oh! (GRUNTS) My back!

Are you okay?

- No!
- All right.

Let me help you up.

No, no. No, no. I'm fine. I'm fine.

I'm ju-just... Let me lay here
for just a minute.

Can I get you some ice or something?

No, no, no. You've got to stay in bed.

- (EXHALES) Okay.
- Well, you look like

the "I've fallen and
I can't get up" lady.

That's because I have fallen
and I can't get up.

(LAUGHS)

Okay, it hurts when I laugh.

(LAUGHING)

Here, honey.

- Here you go.
- Oh, thanks.

Oh!

(GASPS) Oh, dear Lord,
let me help you up.

Don't touch me.

Don't touch me. I'll get
up when I'm ready.

Should I call the doctor?

No, no. It just happens
every once in a while.

I just need to take it
easy for a couple days.

- Then I'll be fine.
- Well,

can I get you a pillow?

Ooh. A pillow would be nice.

- Here.
- (MOANS)

And what's going on with you?

Oh, high blood pressure.
Doctor wants me on bed rest.

Probably worried about preeclampsia.

Did everyone read this book?

Well, I can take off work
and look after y'all.

We're fine.

Fine? You're on the floor.

What happens if you
need to use the bathroom?

Depends.

Depends on what?

No, it's a joke.

(LAUGHS) I got it.

- (LAUGHING)
- What's the joke?

Tell me.

(LINE RINGING)

(OLD WOMAN'S VOICE):
Hello, Mr. O'Brien's office.

Is Mr. O'Brien there?

It's John Sturgis and Sheldon Cooper.

(NORMAL VOICE): Oh, it's me.

I was just making sure
you weren't the IRS. What's up?

I have some troubling news.

The university is making
a competing grant database.

- Wasn't it your idea?
- SHELDON: It was,

but Dr. Linkletter
is claiming he assisted me.

Well, there's nothing wrong
with a little competition.

I mean, you think I was the only person

designing anti-static lab furniture?

- You weren't?
- GARY: No.

I researched the competition,
outbid their manufacturers

and tied them up in court
so long they ran out of money.

That seems a little ruthless.

Hey, if you're not ruthless,
you're toothless.

I like that.

I know. It rhymes.

But the university's
already ahead of us.

Yeah, but do they have
a really cool company name?

Yes, they're calling it Granted.

Damn, it was right there.

Okay, I can't cover
the video store, the Laundromat,

and the other room all at the same time.

I want to work in the other room.

You're not working the other room.

I got the other one.

I call dibs on video store.

Aw. I wanted video store.

Too bad. I called dibs.

Great, you got the Laundromat.

But I don't want the Laundromat.

Well, dibs are dibs. She called it.

He's a good boss.

That's right.

Slow.

- Slow.
- Any slower and we're just standing.

Okay, look, I got this, okay?
Just leave me alone.

All right. I'm gonna go check on Mandy.

Slow.

- (KNOCKING)
- MARY: Hi.

You doing okay?

- (TV CLICKS OFF)
- I'm fine.

You really don't need to fuss over me.

Oh, I don't mind.

I appreciate it.

I'm just kind of used to
taking care of myself.

Well, that's what family's for.

Speaking of which, do you
want me to call yours?

Why?

If my daughter was on bed rest,

I would want to know.

If they want to know how I'm doing,

they can pick up the phone and call.

I'm sure if your mom
knew what was going on,

she'd be here to help.

Well, I told my mom I was pregnant

and she stopped talking to me. So...

I know, but...

It's not your business, Mary.

Okay, sorry.

(TOILET FLUSHES)

Hello, Toby.

I'm not supposed to talk to you.

But no one told you not to talk to me.

What do you want?

We want to offer you a job.

And for you to wash your hands.

I already have a job.

We know.

We want you to do the same
thing, but for more money.

Okay.

Really, that's all it took?
Where's the loyalty?

Sheldon, this is what we want.

I know, but what if somebody comes along

and offers him more money?
Is he just gonna leave us?

Are you?

Probably.

We can hire him, but he cannot
go to the bathroom alone.

Welcome aboard.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Let's hit that sink.

If you're looking for
something to watch,

I'd recommend Princess Bride.

- Really?
- I know it sounds

a little girly, but there's
an awesome sword fight

and André the Giant's in it.

Cool. Thanks.

Just doing my job.

I'm Melissa, by the way.

♪ We should be together... ♪

Need any help over here?

Are you trying to touch my underwear?

No, ma'am.

Well, then step away.

Yes, ma'am.

Ah! I knew it. You poached
my programmer.

You poached his idea.

Toby, what happened to loyalty?

It's annoying, isn't it?

There's an old saying:

"You mess with the bull,
you get the horns".

Well, there's a new saying:

"We have a programmer and you don't".

(GIGGLES) Yeah.

HAGEMEYER: Really?

You poached our programmer?

I left him alone for five
minutes to use the bathroom.

I don't know why you're so surprised.

I'm told that business
is a high-stakes game

where if you're not ruthless,
you're toothless.

We just learned that.

You could have hired anyone else.

Coulda, woulda, shoulda.

Oh, you want to play hardball?

We can do that, too.

You see, Sheldon gets a lot
of perks at this university

that could go away real fast.

But I like my perks.

How would you like to have
a roommate or two

in that dorm room of yours?

Let's give her what she wants.

Stay strong.

Look, all I'm saying is you
need us as much as we need you.

Now, for example, we have

a mainframe computer and you don't.

Ha! No mainframe, no database.
Who's toothless now?

We can get our own mainframe.

We can? They're really expensive.

I'm trying to be ruthless.
Work with me here.

We can.

Hey. I brought you a snack
and some magazines.

Oh, thanks, but I should
probably finish this.

Although I do know how it ends.

With bodily fluids. Everywhere.

And then a sweet little boy or girl.

Oh, um, it's a girl.

(GASPS) Really?

Yeah, Georgie didn't want
to know so I haven't said.

Well, that is wonderful!

Oh, it'll be our little secret.

MEEMAW: I already know! Don't
go feeling like you're special.

Do you mind? We're having a moment here.

Carry on.

(SIGHS) As you can see,

the mother-daughter bond is strong.

Well, compared to me and my mom,
you two are magic.

Well, we've had our ups and downs.

She wasn't the easiest
mom to grow up with.

Sometimes I felt like I was
kind of raising myself.

But now we're practically best friends.

Yeah, I don't think that's in
the cards for me and my mom.

I hear you whispering in there.
Don't listen to her, Mandy.

Dear Lord, I was just telling her

how you and I are best friends!

That's how you talk to your best friend?

Everything working okay for you?

I heard about you.
You're that panty sniffer.

No. No, no, no, there was no sniffing.

Barbara, he doing it again.

No. No. Uh, j... Oh, I give up.

I'm totally into old movies.

You know, Breakfast Club,
Goonies, Pretty in Pink.

Hey. How's it going?

Fine. Bye.

Not much going on at the Laundromat.

Thought maybe I could lend you a hand.

Nope, all good. Go check on Georgie.

All right.

So, you doing anything later?

Yeah, she's going home with her father.

Dad.

I-I'm sorry, sir, I didn't know.

Yeah, did you know that
she's in the seventh grade?

- Dad!
- I thought she was older.

Well, now you know. b*at it.

Right.

- (DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES)
- Are you happy?

He is way too old for you.

Have you seen you and Mom?

Hey, your mother and I were
high school sweethearts.

Yeah, she was in high school.
You were, like, .

People looked older back then.

(KNOCKING)

Hello?

Yeah, I'm here to
install some bunk beds.

But I don't need bunk beds.
I'm just one person.

All I know is they're turning
this room into a triple.

Triple?

This is getting serious.
They're playing hardball.

And hardball is just one more
type of ball I'm bad at.

GARY: Okay, just calm down. I'm sure

I can find us a used mainframe.

Where? How? From whom?

I don't know, but Jupiter
just entered Sagittarius,

so I have a good feeling.

You're not filling me
with confidence, Gary.

Ah, teenagers. Always so angsty.

I love it.

(SIGHS)

Hey, Mom, it's me.

No, nothing's wrong.
I was just calling to talk.

No, I am not calling to apologize.

No, I don't need any money.

No, I don't need anything from you.

You know what? This was a mistake.

Yeah, goodbye.

Hi. Welcome to Video Village.

I'm Missy, I'm in seventh grade,
and that's my father.

Uh, hi.

I'm Carl,

I'm , and my dad is dead.

Yeah, I'm sorry about her.

And your dad.

What are you doing?

Saving you the trouble
of embarrassing me.

Look, it's not easy
seeing you talk to guys.

Especially older guys.

You want to know what's not easy?

Hearing from Billy Sparks
about you and his mother

hanging out in their chicken coop.

What?

He said he saw y'all
leaving there the other day.

(SNORTS) We were talking chickens.

And he said it wasn't the first time.

They got a lot of chickens.

(SIGHS)

And now there's bunk beds in my room?

It's like summer camp.
Two words I loathe.

Sometimes roommates can
become lifelong friends.

I still exchange letters
with my roommate

from the mental hospital.

They're written in a language
he made up,

but it's nice to know he cares.

I have a delivery for Sheldon Cooper.

That's me. What is it?

A computer mainframe.

He got one.

I just need to tell
the guys where to put it.

Well, I suppose it could go in here.

Or I think I have a solution
to my roommate problem.

I can't have roommates
if my dorm has no room

for those mates.

Right this way.

So, you know, me and
Brenda are just friends.

She's been going through a rough patch

and just needed someone to talk to.

Okay.

Good.

Why'd you say it was about chickens?

Because it's Brenda's personal business,

and-and just trying
to be a good neighbor.

And she don't want Billy to worry,

so we used the chicken coop.

Which all makes sense, right?

I guess.

Good.

I'm glad we can talk about these things.

Me too.

Someday we'll talk about
Mom and Pastor Rob.

(DOOR OPENS)

Excuse me, are you Mrs. McAllister?

I am. Can I help you?

I'm Mary Cooper. Georgie's mom.

Oh. Hello.

I don't know what's going on
between you and your daughter,

but you need to get over it.

She is scared, she is pregnant,
and she needs her mother.

I'm getting parenting advice
from a woman

whose -year-old son
got my daughter pregnant?

Yes, you are.

Georgie made a mistake,

but I did not cut him out of my life.

You don't know...

I don't care.

You are her parent. Act like it.

So, grow up, call your daughter
and make it right.

Now!

Well, I need...

I said now.

I was gonna say

I need the phone number.

Okay.

Do you have a pen?

All right.

Plug it in.

(KNOCKING)

Huh?

Hello.

(SIGHS)

Unbelievable.

President Hagemeyer, have you
come to meet my new roommate,

VAX ?

Sheldon, you can't have
a mainframe in your dorm.

Actually, there's no rule against it.

I can't have a candle, a microwave,

a hot plate, a coffee maker,
a toaster or a waterbed.

But there's nothing against a mainframe.

Well, I'm the president
of the university

and I'm telling you you can't.

You're just trying
to sabotage our project

because you know we're
gonna b*at you to market.

Sheldon, plug it in.

SHELDON: There really should
be a rule against this.