03x10 - I Just Love Her

[bunniefuu]

If only it could
have been possible

to go through life
without any missteps.

If only this world...
could have been a kinder one.

Without anxiety or fear,
where I didn't hurt anyone,

and no one hurt me.

If only things
had been different.

If I'd taken a better path--
a shorter path--

to the kinder world
I've been wishing for.

Without any wrong
turns or regrets.

Yun-Yun, I heard
Honda's in the hospital.

That true?

Hm? How did you know?

Somebody in your class
told me about it.

Plus, I also heard orange hair
dude's been absent for days.

He doin' okay?

I don't know. Or care.

Yun-Yun.

So, Kimi's been wondering
forever about that Honda girl.

What exactly is she to you?

She's his mom.

Okay, no one
thinks you're funny.

Yun-Yun! Kakeru's
saying creepy stuff.

Why's that creepy?

She protected Yun-Yun
when he was

as weak and defenseless
as a baby deer.

Sometimes I hate you.

Um, so, like, what's that mean?
Is she his girlfriend?

No. It's just like
told you, she's his mom.

Seriously, that does
not make any sense.

Just drop it!

President, looks like
you have some visitors.

I don't understand.

Kyon's not at the
creepy writer's house,

and he hasn't shown his
face around here, either.

What is going on with him?

Good question,
especially since Tohru

refuses to say
anything about him.

Something happened.
I'd like to know what.

Tohru gave us
the one-minute summary

of how she ended up here.

Of what happened between
her and Akito Soma.

I'm not sure how much you know,

or what she said
happened to her,

but it's my fault.

I'm the reason she got hurt.

You might think that,

but Tohru doesn't believe that
her fall was anyone's fault.

Also, um, I heard
about you and Kureno.

You should know,
he's here, too. As a patient.

He's here...
because I stabbed him.

I shackled him to me,
trampled his will.

But even so, he won't blame me.

And now I...

You're a woman, aren't you?

According to Kureno,
there was someone in his life

he had to stay with.

Someone who needed him.

It was you.

Her existence wasn't
what hurt me, not really.

It was both simpler and more
complicated than that.

It was the realization that
I was the outsider here.

That in the years
of Kureno's life,

I was nothing but a footnote.

I'd been polishing a
single day's memories

like they were some diamond,

and it made me feel
a little pathetic.

That's what hurt the most.

I'm surprised.
I didn't think you'd come.

[UOTANI
Why not?

[KURENO
'Cause... I don't deserve you.

You spoke with Akito, right?

The truth is, there's one last
thing I need to do for her.

What?

I... I need to leave.

If I stay, she'll never
forgive herself.

Always, up until the very end.

Well, in that case,
go wherever you want to.

Doesn't matter to me.

I'll follow anywhere.

I mean it. Y'know why?

If you don't... that's too bad.
I'm not telling you.

It's fine. I don't mind.

If you need time, I can wait.

But from now on, I'll be
more than just a footnote.

A convenience store breakfast?

How low we've sunk.

What else could we do?

We're out of rice, bread,
pretty much everything.

Having Tohru has spoiled us.

We're even worse at taking
care of ourselves now

than we were before she came.

Good thing she's being released
today, or we might starve.

Ooh, what should we ask her
to cook this evening?

Nothing because we're
not total jerks.

And still no Kyo.

I wonder where he ran off to.

Welcome home.

Um, wait, what?

Whoopsie. Did I forget
to lock up after us again?

Seriously?

Hmm.

Your forgetfulness made
it an easy conquest.

It was wide open,
so I slid right in.

How's Honda? Good?

Yeah. They're releasing
her this afternoon.

Great news. I'm glad.

Rin was impressively
worried about her.

"Impressively" how?

She turned blue,
then kind of gray,

then a shade of brown.

Five stars.

It's not like she's a movie.

Also, the size of
her boobs definitely increased.

I can't tell if you're
trying to lighten the mood,

brag, or sexually harass me.

All three?

Of course.

Huh?

What do you suppose
that was? Is Kyo back?

Oh, I see. Maybe that's
why the door was unlocked.

Hey, he never went
to visit her, right?

I get it.

I get that he has his own
pain and his own reasons.

But as far as I'm concerned,

they don't matter even the
tiniest little bit right now.

See ya later, then.

Where were you?

Not here. Or at the hospital.

Miss Honda is being
released today.

Running away?

Say what you want.

Me being here would hurt her.
I can't protect her.

It's better if she has you.

Oh. So that's how it is.

My poor house.

This is what comes of
living with two boys.

Hey, can I order pizza?

What does that mean?
You can't protect her from what?

You think you should catch her
before she falls off a cliff?

Or swoop in and save her
from getting hit by a car?

Yeah, that'd be amazing.
But who the hell are you?

Do you think you're some
kind of superhero?

No. You're just a stupid Cat.

Shut up!

I didn't say that and
it's not what I think.

Yeah, sure, I bet somebody
like you could pull that off.

But if I could be like you,
I already would be!

Don't you understand?!

I wanted that.

To be you!

'Kay. Fine.

Fight all you want to,
I don't care anymore.

Can I get some nuggets, too?

Go to hell. Go to hell.

Go to hell! Go to hell!

Go to hell!

So did I!

That's what I wanted.
To be like you.

I admired you so
much. And now...

You had to go and say it first!
Easily, like it's nothing!

Screw you. Screw you!

But...

...you're you. I'm me.

And we can never
be anything more.

We can only be ourselves.

We have to accept ourselves...
and face who we are.

You did protect her!

You protected her
just fine, dumbass!

Maybe it doesn't mean much,
making somebody smile.

And yeah, maybe it's
not like being a hero

with special
supernatural powers,

but when you're with her...
Miss Honda looks so happy!

Do you seriously think
I could do that?

Make her smile just
by being there?

Cut the crap!

Open your eyes and realize there
are things only you can do!

Don't make her cry!
Get your damn act together!

Why are you just sitting there?

The guy you claim to admire
gave you a pep talk,

get out there and do
something about it.

Stupid Cat.

Damn it.

That idiot. I hate him.

Things only I can do...

That's right.

Before I see her... there's
another stop I need to make.

Try not to worry.

Nobody's going to
hate you, Hiro-chan.

They'll understand.
I'm sure of it.

I'm happy to be the
first one you told

about your curse breaking.

It means a lot.

Kisa.

Huh?

This means I'm not a member
of the zodiac anymore.

Does that bother you?

Uh.

Hiro-chan, what about you?

Being near me,

is it hard since I'm still
possessed and you're not?

Does it bother you?

What? No, it's-- Uh.

Huh?

That's Kyo.

I heard he hasn't been home
since everything happened.

Um. Excuse me, sir.

Who said you could
let him in here?!

I'm sorry, but he--

Why'd you come?
What do you want?

You dare to set foot
in this house

without so much as a hint
of guilt on your face!

Drinking? Isn't it a bit
early in the day for that?

I mean, how can you
work if you're--?

Shut up! What do you know?

I work plenty. Plenty!

It's just that, right now,
I'm taking a vacation

because I haven't
been feeling well.

And whose fault is that?

I'm sure according
to you it's mine.

You're damn right it is!

Like her death.
That was your fault, too.

Admit you k*lled her!

You won't get away with this

just because you didn't
physically hurt her.

You're guilty...

I feel sick.

It's as if all these emotions--
hatred and fear and grief--

got tossed into a pot
and boiled into a vile stew.

Get your act together.

If it weren't for you, then--

Yeah, you're right.
It's my fault.

He admitted it.
He finally admitted it!

I heard it with my own ears.
Hey! You did, too, right?

Yes.

Call the main family.

Tell them to come and
get him immediately!

Um, yes, sir.

You'll be locked up
for the rest of your life,

and it's nothing short
of what you deserve!

I refuse.

I won't go in there. Not ever.

I'll live my life
on the outside.

I'll choose.

That's why I came.
To make that clear to you.

There's someone that
I want to be with.

Someone good.

No.
What are you talking about?

It's ridiculous.
You're unforgivable.

Everyone knows
you're unforgivable.

Somebody like you living
like a normal person?

I won't let you!

Monster! Filth!

Accept your fate and spend
the rest of your days

inside a cage like a beast!

Atone for your crime!

Do you understand the shame
that I've been forced to suffer?

What a complete and utter
wreck my life has become?

It would never have
happened if not for you.

If not for her giving
birth to a freak!

"You're the one who
bore this disgusting child."

You're a monster.

I'll never forgive you,
dammit! Never!

"Get out of my sight."

Failures! Do you two enjoy
disgracing me, is that it?

I never want to see you
again. Either of you!

Those words...
you said them before.

To Mom.

Are you trying
to pin your crime on me?

It isn't my fault.

You drove her to depression.

You! You're the reason
she d*ed; it wasn't me.

It wasn't. It wasn't!

It isn't my fault!

It isn't my fault!

You're the monster.

I didn't do anything wrong.

I didn't ask for a
creature like you!

Were you lonely?

Was it hard to bear it all
on your own like that?

I was too young to understand
what you must have felt.

I won't claim I would've
realized as I got older.

Maybe I would have. Maybe not.

But... I'll never know now.

We'll never find out...
because you d*ed.

I wanted you to live, so badly.

I wish you hadn't d*ed.

I wish you hadn't given up
and thrown yourself away.

While you were alive... Mom.

I won't... throw myself away.

No.

I'll try.

While I'm still alive,
I'll try... to really live.

I won't allow this!

Let go--

Ah! He'll k*ll me!

Someone. Someone, help!

He'll k*ll me! He'll
k*ll me! He'll k*ll me!

Pardon me,
but regarding the Cat,

shall I have someone go and
fetch him like his father wants?

It's fine. I'll go myself.

I have something to tell
his father anyway.

Kyo is free.

And I'm destroying that
cottage. Completely.

You're serious?

Yes.

And you think
his father will accept it?

No. But I've made up my mind.

I envy you young people.

You can change your whole
way of life so easily.

But I can't. Too many
years have passed.

I was born and raised here.

I don't know any life
outside of this estate.

It's too late.

Maybe you can change in the
blink of an eye, but I can't.

I spent , , years
building the life

that I have now.

I simply can't walk
away from it.

It's too hard. Too frightening.

I'm too old to change.
I-I can't do it.

Then don't.

Stay exactly where you are.
Do what you want.

But I'm going. It's past time.

What to do and how to do it.

The answers are simple.

So simple,
but difficult as hell.

It was hard for me to get them.

And that's what makes
them so valuable.

I'll visit again.

No. Wait! Get back here!

Stop! I won't allow this!

I'll never, ever forgive you!

If only it could
have been possible

to go through life
without any missteps.

But... it's not.

We fail, we stumble, we get
lost, we make mistakes.

The path is there.

We just have to keep walking
it one step at a time.

On our own two feet,
however much we get hurt,

we have to move toward
that something,

or that someone,
at our destination.

Hello? Machi, what's wrong?

Um, nothing. Sorry.

I know this is out of the blue,
but... could we meet?

There's something
I wanna give you.

Where are you right now?

Huh? Uh, one station
away from the school.

Wait there! I'm headed your way!

Please. Wait for me.

I wanna see you!

Time to say a prayer...
and start walking.

But... after what I said...

...will she still accept me?

And me--do I still love her?

Really love her?

What do I love about her?

Why do I love her?

How much do I...?

Wait. None of that matters.

I love her.

I love her.

I just... love her so much.

Toh--

Uhh...

She ran like she was trying
out for the track team.

Nothin' to do at this
point but laugh.

You can't hear, but I'm
laughing on the inside.

No. I'm faster than
you are, dammit!

I won't let you go.

It's crazy. It's really crazy...

Jeez!

You shouldn't be
sprinting the second

you get out of the hospital!

...how much I want her.

"Goodbye."