03x18 - The Demon Within

[bunniefuu]

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

(THUNDER RUMBLING)

Okay, so I've seen the old junk.
Now can I go play some videos?

The whole point of bringing you here

was to keep you away
from those games for one night.

Well, at least I'm not
the only prisoner here.

So they got you too, huh?

I beg your pardon.

You know, did your parents
force you into this?

I'm here by myself.

Oh.

Well, at least you've got kitty
to keep you company.

(SNARLS)

Hey!

Ladies and gentlemen, tonight we offer
a number of fascinating artifacts

from the so-called Dark Ages.

First on the block is this.

It is rumored to have been
the personal branding iron

of the Arthurian-era witch Morgan le Fay.

Legend has it this piece
has some sort of magical power.

Gotham Auctioneers Limited
makes no such guarantee.

(LAUGHTER)

- The suggested opening bid is , .
- KLARION: , .

(INDISTINCT MURMURING)

I said, , .

Ah, Master Klarion. Good to see you again.

, is the bid.

That kid has grand?
You've gotta raise my allowance.

- AUCTIONEER: The bid is , .
- Shh!

AUCTIONEER: Do I hear--
JASON: .

MAN : What?

MAN : Somebody else
is actually bidding for it?

(CHUCKLING) Unbelievable.

AUCTIONEER: is the bid
from Mr. Blood, is it?

- .
- JASON: .

- .
- .

.

(ALL GASPING AND MURMURING)

- AUCTIONEER: Going once, going twice.
- One million.

- (INDISTINCT CHATTER AND MURMURING)
- (MAN WHISTLES)

AUCTIONEER: The bid is one million.

Going once, going twice.

- (GAVEL BANGS)
- Sold.

(CHATTER CONTINUES)

There goes my raise.

So, what now?
Gonna buy a herd of cattle to use it on?

- No. This was to help a friend.
- That's some kind of friend.

You don't know the half of it.

KLARION: Exquisite craftsmanship,
isn't it, Mr. Wayne?

- Enjoy it while you can.
- Who are--

Klarion.

Why am I not surprised to see you here?

We do have a way of bumping
into each other, Uncle Jason.

Next time, it'll be on purpose.

(CAT YOWLS)

- Jason.
- Bruce. Thanks for stepping in.

It was nothing.

But tell me, how'd you ever get
a brat like that for a nephew?

We're not related.

For some reason,
it amuses him to call me "Uncle."

But don't underestimate him.
He'll do anything to get what he wants.

BRUCE: Surely his parents--
JASON: Don't expect any help from them.

The little witch-boy
turned them into mice.

You're not serious.

(HISSES)

I'll repay you for this, Bruce. I promise.
It may be a while.

Let's just call it
a professional courtesy.

Who's this? Sure is ugly.

JASON: It's Merlin's demon, Etrigan.

Merlin? The knights-in-armor magician guy?

He had his own demon?

He summoned it to defend
the realm of Camelot, Merlin's home.

When Camelot finally fell,

Merlin decided to keep The Demon
in the service of humanity

and merged the creature
with one of King Arthur's noblemen.

TIM: Look,
there's something on the back of it.

It looks like you.

You think?

TIM: But that'd be impossible.
You'd have to be over , years old.

(GLASS CLINKS)

(SNARLS)

(YOWLS)

(ROARS)

(SNARLS)

(GROANS)

(GRUNTS)

- TIM: Hey!
- (GASPS)

Ah! (GROANS)

(SNARLING)

(SNARLS)

(GROANS)

"Gone, gone, the form of man
Rise the demon, Etrigan"

(GROWLS)

The Demon. It's real.

- (SNARLS)
- Ah!

(GRUNTS)

There'll be a reckoning.

Who... How...

Get the fire extinguisher. Now!

She's gone.

As is the brand.

Ah, Teekl. You've done well for me.

(MEOWS)

"Ancient Morgan, I beseech you
From what is one do now make two

"Ancient Morgan, I beseech you"

TIM: Come on, I've had sunburns
worse than this.

This won't hurt a bit.

(CHANTING SPELL IN ANCIENT TONGUE)

Whoa.

So all this is what I think it is, right?
Magic? Sorcery?

"There are more things
in heaven and earth, Horatio,

"than are dreamt of in your philosophy."

What's that supposed to mean?

It means get up.
We've got a branding iron to find.

(JASON YELLS)

(GROANING)

- Jason?
- (GLASS SHATTERS)

Oh!

Jason? Etrigan? What's happening?

Etrigan, wait. Something's wrong.

Nothing is wrong. My new master awaits.

Ah!

(CACKLING)

KLARION: You hate me, don't you?

Speak up, I order you.

Yes, I hate you.

But there's nothing you can do about it.
Not while I have this.

You can't do anything
unless I tell you to.

And you have to do everything I say.
Understand?

Good. Now, let's go have some fun.

(CLEARS THROAT)

JASON: It was The Demon's presence
in my body

all those centuries
that kept me from aging.

But now, I'll be showing
every day of my age, until--

That's not going to happen, Jason.
Not if I can help it.

- Me too.
- You're staying here, Tim.

- Jason might need you.
- Bruce, you're trying to find a kid.

Who'd be better than another kid to help?

I have a feeling
Klarion won't be hard to find.

(ALL SCREAMING)

I hate sequels. Do it.

(LAUGHS)

(ICE CREAM TRUCK JINGLE PLAYING)

Mmm! Ice cream.

(VENDOR SCREAMS)

Well? What are you waiting for?

No strawberry, master.

There's nothing as good as strawberry.

Nothing.

Except maybe... cake!

Mmm! Delicious! Delicious!

Mmm?

(GROANS)

(TRAIN RUMBLING)

Noisy!

(PASSENGERS SCREAMING)

Ah!

And now those ugly old buildings.

(LAUGHS HEARTILY)

BATMAN: You've done enough damage

- for one night, young man.
- Huh?

(TEEKL SNARLS)

- You think you're going to stop me?
- Yes.

No one's talked to me like that
in so long.

- Get used to it.
- I'd rather not.

(CHANTING SPELL IN ANCIENT TONGUE)

Huh? (GROANING)

(SCREAMS)

That's why no one talks to me that way.

(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

- He's k*lling him.
- Relax.

(CHANTING SPELL IN ANCIENT TONGUE)

Ah! (GROANS)

- (SNARLS)
- (GASPS)

(CHANTING SPELL IN ANCIENT TONGUE)

(STRUGGLING)

(SCREAMS)

Would now be a good time
to conjure up a flock of woodpeckers?

(LAUGHS)

(GRUNTS)

Oh, I see. You're having some help
from Uncle Jason, aren't you?

Etrigan, no more games. k*ll him!

Yes, master.

You better think of something, and fast.

- It's another of Uncle Jason's tricks.
- (SNARLS)

Get them all.

That's the real one. Get him!

(SCREAMS)

(GROWLS)

(GRUNTS)

(RUMBLING)

Etrigan's coming for him. Do something!

I'm... I'm running out of strength.

(CHANTING SPELL IN ANCIENT TONGUE)

- How could you have lost him?
- (GROWLS)

- Don't you growl at me.
- (YOWLS)

You have to do everything I say, remember?

And what I want you to do now

is go right to the source
and k*ll Uncle Jason!

(CACKLING)

That doesn't sound so good for us.

(SIGHS EXHAUSTEDLY)

Get me that blue powder
on the shelf over there.

Now, spread it around us in a circle.

- What good will that do?
- Do what I say.

(CHANTING SPELL IN ANCIENT TONGUE)

Okay, it's done.

Ah!

This is the only place
where you'll be safe from him.

(CHANTING SPELL IN ANCIENT TONGUE)

(COUGHS AND CONTINUES CHANTING)

Don't give up, Etrigan.

Think I could have some of this powder
for my utility belt?

(GROWLS)

(GROANS)

Looks like it's time
for another spell, Mr. Blood.

- Mr. Blood?
- (GROANING)

(ELECTRIC CRACKLING)

(STRAINING)

- Yes!
- (YOWLS)

Quiet, Teekl. I want to savor this.

- (SNARLING)
- I said quiet!

(KLARION GROANS)

(GASPS) That's mine!

(STRAINING)

(STRAINING)

(GRUNTS)

(GRUNTS)

Ahh!

(GROANING WEAKLY)

(STRAINING)

"The witch's evil now undo
Make the one from what is two"

Huh?

(GASPS)

(GROANS)

- Uh, Etrigan? Mr. Blood?
- (PANTING)

I know you've been through a lot tonight,
both of you,

but we've still got a problem.

(BREATHING HEAVILY)

(TEEKL MEOWS)

- Look, Teekl. Dinner.
- (SCREECHING)

(ROARS)

(GROWLS)

Sit!

(PURRS AND MEOWS)

So you've picked up a few tricks.
It won't save you.

(YELLS)

(YELLING)

(GASPS)

(GROANING)

(SCREAMS)

(GROANING)

(YOWLING)

What now?

"Mother's grief, father's shame
Soon he goes to whence he came"

What's that mean?

I'm sending him to his room.

(WIND HOWLS)

- About tonight.
- Don't ask. Just don't ask.

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)