02x36 - Blackfoot and Slim/Trapped with a Vengeance/The Parrot Trap

[bunniefuu]

Narrator:
The concrete jungle.

Deep within its seemingly
endless towers--glass, steel,
and mortar--life exists.

Large, colorful, metallic herds
vie for position

on its main thoroughfares

as many different life forms
fill its walkways

with constant activity.

But our story takes us
to the outskirts of
this harsh environment,

outside, to a more
docile setting.

Here, more timid creatures
live and work among one another

in smaller dwellings.

One dwelling in particular
has captured our attention,

for deep within its barriers
a discovery has been made,

a discovery of a creature
living
in somewhat secret seclusion

within towering
artificial walls and barriers

of flashing brilliance
and display--

none of which has been seen
anywhere else in the world--

built with skillful hands
and a greater knowledge.

Yes, within
this sterile environment

lives a new class of creature:
Dexterius h*m*.

Although pale from lack
of exposure to the sun,

we've appropriately
dubbed him "blackfoot."

Full of peculiar habits,
we follow blackfoot

on a typical day of activity,
intrigue, and adventure.

After years of close study,

one habit in particular

has eluded our reasoning
as to why:

The repetitive motion

of this strange ritual,

which can last for hours
at a time,

is perhaps an inherited
genetic defect.

Amazing...

We must keep a safe distance
from blackfoot,

for there is always
that element of danger.

[Screaming]

See how blackfoot's
meticulous preparation

leads into some
ritualistic song and dance.

His high-pitched chanting
can be heard

echoing into the far reaches
of his lair,

evoking rain or good fortune--

or perhaps
the spirits themselves.

Blackfoot's ritual
comes to an abrupt end.

Motionless, he lies there
in an ecstatic state for hours.

Amazing.

One of the most intriguing
qualities of this little guy

is his ability to procreate.

In the flash of an instant
his task is done,

after which he goes into a hail

of self-appreciating grunts.

Awoo awoo awoooo!

Narrator: And now, thanks to
the marvels of modern
technology,

we are able to slow down
this amazing process

and see firsthand how he
achieves this incredible feat.

[Drill whines]

[Whirring]

Amazing...

But lo, blackfoot's excitement
won't last long,

for unbeknownst to him,
somewhere in his domain

lurks the master of camouflage,

the wizard of stealth
and ever-present foe
to his creations,

deedicus deedicus,

whom we have
affectionately dubbed "slim."

With great agility and speed,

she approaches her target...

Eeeee!

Using a high-pitched squeal
to render blackfoot helpless.

Slim makes her way to
blackfoot's amazing creation,

and with the same speed and
accuracy of blackfoot
himself...

Destroys it.

Amazing...

Again with the aid
of modern technology,

we may see just how this deed
is accomplished

time and time again.

Amazing...

The only time blackfoot leaves
the safety of his lair

is to forage for food.

With an opportunity
of great size in sight,

blackfoot takes his chance.

Nearly upon his meal,

blackfoot is knocked out
of the running

by larger, more agile creatures,

who go at the act of eating in
a gruesome, animalistic manner.

Oh, I can't watch!

[Gobbling]

[Gobbling]

[Slurp]

[Gobbling]

Yes, it is common for
the smaller and weaker creatures

to be left out of a meal.

Left only with scraps,

blackfoot searches for
even a tiny morsel...

But to no avail.

Defeated and hungry,
blackfoot returns

to the sanctity and solitude
of his lair.

Hygiene also plays
an important role

in blackfoot's agenda.

See how he removes his outer
protective layer,

exposing his pale underlayer.

Once in the water,

blackfoot captures
a nearby creature

and squeezes a thick secretion
from its head,

which he works into
a fine lather.

See also how he cleanses
the rest of his body

with a foreign object,

paying special attention
to the details.

Hey, that tickles.

Unfortunately, before we could
witness this event further,

blackfoot discovered us.

Sensing danger,
blackfoot makes a run for it.

Realizing we may lose track
of blackfoot, we give chase,

and have no alternative
but to tranquilize him...

Thus putting an end
to our research for now.

For someday we shall return

to check up on
this wonderful creature,

this wonderful world

of blackfoot.

Man: My yob is simple--

after their designated hours
of their education,

the children exit
to return home,

while I clean,

sweep,

and prepare their environment
for the next day of education

in sterile surroundings.

For I am yani the yanitor.

It is an uncomplicated yob
that leaves me much time after

to spend with my beloved wife.

But one children continues
to complicate situation
and t*rture.

[Deep-voiced laughter]

Night after night, he stays
much time past designated hours.

And when he decides to go,

he leaves a residue of filth
that prolongs me from
my beloved

for several more hours--

and when I return home,
my love is taking her slumber,

and waking her would be
catastrophical.

So I wait and I plan,

until the day that he would need
to exit quickly

for something important--

for then I will have him...

[Ringing]

Yessiree, working here

is much more peaceful than

being at home with Dee Dee.

Working late again,
Dexter?

Yes, sir, yani.

I'll be burning
the midnight oil
tonight, for sure.

[Beeps]

Heh heh--will you
excuse me, please?

Sure, Dexter.
No problem.

Huh? An emergency
action message?

Computer: Dexter, Dee Dee
has located

the curbo-comic laser Cannon.

Probability of lab destruction
is --

[static]

Oh, my gosh!
I have to get home immediately!

Gotcha!

I can't believe Dee Dee's
got the Cannon.

Well, it shouldn't be too hard

to stop her.

Why did the stupid
janitor lock the door?

Yani on P.A.: It's always
the yanitor who is stupid--

huh, Dexter?

Aah! Who said that?

Why, it's your pal
yani, Dexter.

Why did you
lock the door?

Oh, I just wanted
to make sure

that you don't get
disturbed working
tonight.

Oh, thank you,
but I'll be leaving
early tonight.

No, Dexter, I don't
think you understand.

You're staying here--

forever!

Ha ha ha ha ha!

Hmm. The janitor
has gone crazy

and locked me in,

Dee Dee is destroying
the lab at home--

what am I gonna do?

Doors locked--

windows barred in--

security camera is watching
my every move--

fire alarm--

heh heh heh heh.
Vengeance is sweet.

[Ringing]

Uh-oh.

Yes, yes!
Dexter, you are a genius.

Open up in there!

Hey, how's it going?

No problem here.

I'm the yanitor.

Yust a glitch
in the system.

Roger that.

So, Dexter, you thought
you can play trick on yani--

but it is yani
who will be playing
the tricks tonight.

Eh, Dexter?

[Gasp]

Yani:
Ho ho ho! Dexter,

the firemen couldn't
find the fire,

but I think things will start
to heat up for you.

Owee! Ow! Owoo! Owee ow!

Whoa!

Aah!

Ow! Ooh! Eee!

Agh! Ooh! Aah!

[Panting]

Yani: So,
are you too hot, Dexter?

Well, let me cool you down
a little.

No!

Ow! Ooh! Eee! Agh! Aah!

Yani: Going up?

Ow! Ooh! Ow! Ow! Ow!

Aaaaagh!

Yani: Going down.

[Buzzing]

Perfect.

What the--?

Hello, Dexter.

What are you,
crazy or something?

No, Dexter!

I want you to feel
the pain that I feel

when you make me
stay late every night!

What?

Here you go, Dexter.

There's the exit.

Go home.

Aah!

[Crunching]

Aah!

[Growls]

Yes, yes!

That is the pain
inside my heart.

Aah!

Yes, Dexter, yes!
You're almost there.

Oops. Too late!

So, smarty pants--

what do you say now?

Clean up this mess.

[Growls]

Yani!

Liebchen.

Do notliebchen

I wait every night for you
to come home,

thinking that
you're working hard--

but
here I find you

goofing around
with friends!

But--

no.

Not another word.

You coming home...

But--

now!

You, boy--
open door!

Heh heh,
yes. Ma'am.

Come, yani.

But--
come!

Boy, the holidays sure do
make people

do the craziest things.

[Whistlingjingle bells ]

Hey, puppet pal
clem--

why don't
we pass the time

by singing
a song?

Ok, puppet pal
Mitch.

That sounds like fun.

Ok. Here goes.

♪ bottles of
bonk on the wall ♪

♪ bottles
of bonk ♪

♪ take one down,
pass it around ♪

♪ bottles of
bonk on the wall ♪

♪ bottles of
bonk on the wall ♪

♪ bottles
of bonk ♪

[Woozy babble]

♪ bottles of
bonk on the wall ♪

[Ticking]

[Ringing]

Dexter, my boy,

you are a genius.

Dexter, my boy,

you are a genius.

Exactly.

Dexter: Dexter has
the most brilliant mind

in the entire universe.

Dexter has the most
brilliant mind

in the
entire universe.

Dexter's fantastic
creations

are the envy of

all of the world!

Dexter's fantastic
creations are
the envy

of all the world!

[Sigh]

Not only that,

but, man,
his secret laboratory

is the best secret
laboratory of all time.

Not only that,
but, man,

his secret
laboratory

is the best
secret laboratory
of all time.

My sister Dee Dee
is a very stupid girl.

My sister Dee Dee is
a very stupid girl.

I finally invented someone

I can have an intelligent
conversation with.

I am only sad

that I did not think
of it sooner.

[Alarm]

Dee Dee: Ooh! What do
these buttons do?

No, Dee Dee!
Stop!

Don't
touch anything!

I'm gonna bop you
one, Dee Dee.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Ooh, what's that?

Get out, Dee Dee!

Get out! Get out! Get out!

Oooooh!

Ooooooooh!

Dexter: Oh,
Dee Dee...

Cookie!

[Whistling]

[Whistling]

[Sniff sniff]

It always puts me in
a reasonable mood

to see her go through the door
like that.

Dee Dee: Ooh,
what's that?

Dee Dee, how many times
must I tell you...

What do these
buttons do?

Dexter's
a stupid girl.

No, no, no.

Dexter is the most
brilliant mind

in the entire universe.

Dexter's
a cookie.

I am not a cookie!

Dexter's
a cookie.

Am not!

Are too
a cookie.

I'm gonna bop
you one, girl.

Cookie!

Good riddance.

That had to be
my worst invention yet.

Yup, that's
a big'UN.

Yup, yup.

That's a big'UN for
the Florida everglades.

Next we'll cover
worms and plastic
minnows.

Yup, yup.

Who's trying to
sneak up on me?

Dexter,
boy genius.

Dexter
the cookie.

Shh. I'm trying
to watch my show.

I'm gonna
bop you.

Now, that is no way
to talk to your--

you are stupid girl.

Get out! Get out! Get out!

Yup, yup, yup.

Don't touch anything!

I-I'm sorry.

You're a cookie!

Get out! Get out!
Get out!

All right.
Let's see...

I'll need two eggs...

Hmm. One stick of
butter...

Half a cup of sugar...

A pinch
of cinnamon...

A cup of cinnamon.

A cup of cinnamon.

A quart of pepper.

A quart of pepper.

A box of olives.

A box of peppers.

Yup, yup, yup.

Mom: A block
of cheese.

Parrot: A block
of cheese.

A gallon of milk.

A gallon of milk.

Are you sneaking up
on me?

A cup of coffee.

A cup of coffee.

Beans.

Beans.

Cookies!

Cookies!

Worms and
plastic minnows.

Now, wait just
a minute here.

Where am I going to get
worms and plastic minnows?

The Florida everglades.

Dexter's secret!
Dexter's secret!

Dexter's secret!
Dexter's secret!

Oh, no!

What has that
stupid bird done?

If that canary
sings,

my entire laboratory
will be compromised.

Dexter's secret!
Dexter's secret!

Dexter's secret!

Say, you know,

there's something
strange about
this bird.

Now, where do you suppose
it came from?

Hmm... hmm...

A secret!
A secret!

A secret!

A secret?

All right,
Mr. Bird.

You've got some
explaining to do.

Out with it,
right now!

I'm not going to
ask you again.

Exactly where
did you come from?

Dexter's secret!
Dexter's secret!

Dexter's secret!

Dexter's secret.

Dad: Dexter!

How many times
have I told you

not to throw
the bird?

But, mom,
it's not a real bird.

I built it
in my secret laboratory.

Ohhh!

Smooth move,
Dexter.

Now you'll have to
erase mom and dad's
memories--

again.

Smooth move, Dexter.
Smooth move, Dexter.

Smooth move, Dexter.

Enter at your own peril,

past the vaulted door

where impossible
things may happen

that the world's
never seen before.

♪ In Dexter's laboratory

♪ lives the smartest boy

♪ you've ever seen

♪ but Dee Dee blows
his experiments ♪

♪ to smithereens

♪ there is gloom and doom

♪ while things go boom

♪ in Dexter's lab