Dexter's Laboratory: Ego Trip (1999)

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Dexter's Laboratory". Aired: April 27, 1996 – November 20, 2003.
A child genius, whips up dazzling, world-saving inventions in his secret laboratory.
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Dexter's Laboratory: Ego Trip (1999)

Post by bunniefuu »

[dramatic music]

[thunder rumbling]

[music continues]

[thunder rumbling]

[music continues]

[thunder rumbling]

[thunder rumbling]


[intense music]]


Uh, honey?
I don't think that's gonna fit.

Just a little more, dear.

Ah! Got it.

See hon, I told you
I could do it.


[heavenly music]

'Dee Dee.'

[dramatic music]

[music continues]

Yes. Yes.

With this all powering
Neurotomic Protocore

in my possession
I will make the world mine.

[evil laughter]

'Unhand that Neurotomic
Protocore, Mandark.'

- Who said that?
- 'I did.'

[dramatic music]


Blast you, Dexter.

Hay, now's there's an idea.
Blast Dexter. Yes.

Blast Dexter.

zap zap zap


zap zap zap

ping ping ping




Know this, Mandark
that as long as I live

you will never possess
the Neurotomic Protocore.

I swear it.


And I swear, Dexter,
for as long as I shall live

I will one day possess
the Neurotomic Protocore

and rule the world.
I swear it.

Phew. Now that that is
taken care of

I can get back to work.


[instrumental music]

[whirring continues]

- Hi--
- Stop your gibberish, woman.

I have no time
for you today.

Much too much has happened.

So I bid you adieu.
Goodbye, sister.

You know the exit
is this way, goodbye.


thump thump thump





thunk thunk thunk

Dee Dee, how many times
do I have to tell you

to stay out of my labor..
You're not Dee Dee.

W-w-w-who are you?

We are here to destroy the one
who saved the future.


[dramatic music]


Enough. No robots are gonna
thr*at me in my lab.

Even if they are
from the future.

Futuristic robots
prepare to meet your maker.

[electronic music]


[intense music]

slash slash



[music continues]



[siren blaring]

[music continues]

thump thump thump


Well, that was easy.

No dumb robots from the future
can destroy thislittle genius.

But boy, oh, boy.

I must be something else
for somebody

to go through all of this
trouble. Boy, oh, boy.

Dexter, the boy
who saved the future.

Whoo! I can't wait
for the future.

The future is taking too long.

Wait a second

I don't have to wait
for the future.

I'll just get into my old
trusty time machine.

And zap, boom, pop.

I'll get to see how cool I am.

Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Oh, boy.
Oh, boy.

Future, here I come.



[comical music]

This is very peculiar.
The lab seems untouched.

But I have traveled
the years into the future.

Is there nothing different?

Oooh! This is different.


Hey, what are you non-aliens
doing in my laboratory?

Your laboratory?
This is our rec room.

Who are you?
What are you doing here?

- What's your number?
- I do not have a number.

I am Dexter, the one
who saved the future.

'And I live here.'

- Yow!
- No number, huh? Come with me.

It is a sad-sad world when the
no numbers can just waltz on in

onto private property
with no trouble at all.

I hope you like jail
Mr. No-Number.

Officer - - - here.
How can I be of assistance?

I have here, a no-number.

We're on our way.

[siren blaring]

Let's get him, boys.



[blowing raspberry]

Dexter old boy,
sometimes it is just too easy.


Closet? This is supposed
to be the front door.

Stop where you are
and put your hands in the air.


Where is the front door?

Where is the front door!

Wait, I wonder if
my old emergency exit route

is still here.

Where did he go?
He's nowhere to be found.


I guess I don't live here
in the future.

My folks must have moved out

when the neighborhood
started growing.

'Boy, what cool cars.'


'Would you look at that.
The future.'

Clearly these achievements
must be my own.



[automated voice]
Unauthorized walking.
Identify yourself.

Dexter, boy genius.

State your number.

I have been told
I have no number.

Retinal scan.


Number . Why are you not
at your workstation?

I don't work, I'm a boy.

Must return to work station.

How can I return
to a workstation

I have never even been too?

That is right.
My future self.

Well, Mr. Robot it looks as
though you are taking me exactly

where I want to go.

'To the heart of
the city, robot'

'where my laboratory
in the sky awaits.'

'I love the future.'

[alarm beeping]


Mmm, breakfast.

: ?

Holy cow, I'm almost late.

I better log on.

[automated voice]
'Good morning Number ,
welcome to work.'

Aw, just made it.

Wow, I could have been
in big-big trouble.


- 'Number ?'
- Y-y-yes, sir?

[male # ]
'You were almost late
this morning.'


[male # ]
'Report to my office

[electronic music]

[clock chimes]

[dramatic music]

[keyboard keys clacking]

You're expected.


[instrumental music]

You. Almost late for work again.
Tisk tisk tisk.

Such a pity.

clap clap

There are two types of people
in this world, Number

there are those who struggle
to support their families

scratching and scraping

for any little morsel
of food, oh..

...they can find.

Then there's the strong

the powerful, the elite

with luxuries that others
can't possibly dream of.

'But you, Number ..'

...are neither.



Hey, hey, hey.

What do you think
you're are doing?

This is not
my laboratory in the sky.


Ladies and gentlemen
please excuse the interruption.

I invite you to join me to the
public flogging of Number

for once again
he was almost late for work.

And so, Number ,
before we get started

do you have anything
to say for yourself?

Could I have some padding?



Now make a wish.


Number ?



Number ?



N-n-n-number ?


That's me?

This time has been duly noted

and will be deducted
from your salary.

Thank you.

- Ahhh!
- Ahhh!



No, no please don't hurt me.


I traveled to the future
for this?

'I don't hear any typing
down there, Number .'

Quick, get out of my chair,
I've gotta get back on schedule.

Man, how do you let that
doofus Mandark push you around?

I don't know what you're talking
about. Please leave.

Just out of curiosity
did you become a wimp overnight

or was it
a gradual process?

Oh, I've always been
like this.

Wrong! I am yet to be beaten

by that oversized
head of a man but you..

You cower at the sound
of his voice.



You really have
ruined everything

I have worked for,
haven't you?

I don't know who you are
but please leave.

You don't know who I am?

You don't know who I am!

I travel through space
and time to see you

and you can't even recognize
your own flesh and blood.

- What?
- Yes, I am you.

But it can't be.
Can it?


I'm sorry I wish I could talk

but I'm very-very busy.

What possibly could you do here
that is more important

than talking to yourself?

I hope you know that what I do
here is very important.

I designed these cubicles.

I cannot believe this.

Robots from the future
come back in time to destroy me

'cause I saved the future
and then I travel in time

to see how cool I am
saving the future

and here I find you.
A pitiful excuse of a Dexter.



The Neurotomic Protocore?

Hello, what are these?

Designs utilizing Neurotomics.

'An unlimited power
producing pylon?'

'Teletronic matter

Centralized neurotomic
information distribution?

These ideas are incredible.

No, no, those are nothing.

You should see
the new cubicle design I did.

Ten by ten.

Yes, I increased
the cubicle space by one foot.

Are you crazy?

These plans can
revolutionize the future.

You are a real Dexter after all.

Stop the typing.
Stop the typing.

Stop the typing! You are not
a worker drone, my friend.

You are not just a number.
You are a genius.

And you have got a name.

- What is your name?
- Twelve.

- No. What is your name?
- T-t-twelve.

No. What is your name?

- De-De-De-De..
- Yes. Yes.

- De-De-De.. Dexter?
- Again.

- Dexter?
- Again.




Dexter is the name of a lion,
a tiger, a bear.

Oh, my.

Now let's get the heck
into the future

and see how cool
we are.

[instrumental music]


Number .

[intense music]




Boy, oh, boy, the future.
The future I can hardly wait..

Oh, I think I'm gonna be sick.


Well, it seems that my lab
is back to its original order.

Uh-uh, that is strange.

I forgot how much
I hate time travel.

Ooh! It seems that we're
surrounded by a very large pane.

I'll say.


Can't breathe.

Gotta get out.
Gotta get out. Out! Out!

Let me out!

It's all getting dark.

[deep breathing]



We're out.

Hey, this looks like a museum
of all my old stuff.

Wow. The Giant Dexo-Robo.

Man, me and this puppy have had
quite a few adventures together.

What's this?

Ptooey. Ptooey.


I did not build the Giant
Dexo-Robo out of Styrofoam.

This is not
a fair representation

of the genius that is Dexter.

This is a piece of junk.


'Hey, what's with
all the racket?'

- Mandark?
- Ahhh!

I'm typing, I'm typing.

'I know that's you, Dexter.'

'And don't think I haven't
forgotten what you did to me.'

'I'm still gonna
get you, Dexter.'


- What are you doing?
- I'm typing.

Well cut it out and look.

There's nothing left of Mandark
but his lame brain.

I heard that.

Lame brain.

That's pretty funny.


I wonder what it was

that Mandark
lost his head over.

Oh, I heard that too.

Oh, I'm warning you.

What are you going to do?
Think something bad?

Why you. Come here and
I'll teach you a lesson.

You'll see,
I'll be back on my feet

and destroy you yet, Dexter.

[Dexters laughing]

What is all the ruckus in here?

Who is causing all this?
Oh, my gracious!


Who could have done this?

Who would want
to destroy the homage

to our all-knowing
and omnipotent leader, Dexter?

'I would.'

Oh, my gracious, it's you!

'It's both of you.'

All hail the great
and powerful Dexters.

Proof at last.

Young naive,
cease this exultation at once

and fetch us
your most elegant coach.

We require passage
to see our future self

the great
and powerful, Dexter.

Yes, yes, your grace,
of course, right away.

Thought transference
commencing in

Amazing, what is this?

It's a Teletronicly
Manifested Bubble Transport.

"Teletronicly manifested?"

Yes, one merely has to think
of something and poof

the matter is
teletronicly manifested.

Where does this new science
come from?

Why you of course.
That is, the future you.

See, I told you
your ideas were genius.

Dexters past,
welcome to your future.

Welcome to Dextopia.

[dramatic music]

'Thanks to your
marvelous invention'

'of the Neurotomic Protocore'

all of your knowledge
of science and technology

is disbursed freely
from your brain

'and into the brains
of every inhabitant'

'wearing a
transference receptor.'

'In turn causing
universal wisdom'

'peace, and harmony.'

See, I told you.

'We're here.'

'The Centralized
Neurotomic information'

and Power Distribution Pylon.

Oh, isn't it fab?

Well, this is
as far as I go.

The great one isn't for
the likes of my lowly eyes.

Good luck.


It is just like
in the blueprints.

And look the Neurotomic

'is at the heart of it all.'

And we must be at the top
running the whole show.

I did not think it could happen

but I am more of a genius
than I already am. Shall we?

[doorbell dings]

'Who dares disturb'

'the great
and powerful Dexter'

'whilst he droppeth science
upon the world?'

We are the Dexter's
of the past.

We have come from the past

to find out
how we save the future

your all-knowing presence.

'Presents! I didn't know
it was my birthday.'

'I'll be right down.'


'Who put these stairs here?'




'Oh! My hip!'

[instrumental music]

- Hello.
- Hi.

- Hello.
- Hmm.

- Hello.
- Hey.

- What?
- Hello.

- Hi.
- Hello.

- Stop it.
- Who?

- What?
- Hello.

- Hi.
- Stop it.

- What?
- Hello.

- Hi.
- Hey.

- Stop it.
- What?

- Hello.
- Hi.

- Huh?
- Hello.

- 'Hi.'
- 'Hello.'

- 'What?'
- 'Hey.'

Stop it!

Where are my presents?

We are your presents.

We are you.
Don't you recognize us?

- You are?
- Yes, you are us.

- I am?
- You saved all of mankind.

- I did?
- Don't you remember?

- Remember what?
- How you did it?

- Did what?
- Save the future!

- I did?
- Yes, can you picture it?

- A world in dire need.
- Yes.

- A world in need of a hero.
- Yes.

And there's only one man
to do the job.

- Yes.
- One man, smart enough.

- Yes.
- One man with the strength.

The technology,
the rugged good looks.

- And that man is?
- Yes, yes, yes!

- Us!
- Yes, yes, ye--

- Do you remember?
- No!

Apparently there's only
one thing left to do.

We must again travel in time

back to the very time
of our triumph.

Back to see first-hand

just how cool we really are!

- Yes.
- Oh, boy, oh boy.

I can hardly wait to see
how cool I was.

Come on, hurry up.
Times a wasting. Let's go.

This is going
to be great.

- He's not coming.
- Oh, boy! Oh, boy! Oh, boy!

Don't you think
you could move a bit faster?

Think! I think I can.

Here we go.
Okay, alright, almost there.

I got it now.
I'm in. I'm in.

Thanks, Billy.

[instrumental music]

Coolness, here we come.



Oh, what happened
to the lab this time?

Looks like a b*mb hit.


Hey, look,
oldie found a way out.

It is nice to know some of us
are still on the ball.


Here, gramps,
penthouse, chop-chop.

Elevator up.

Thirteenth floor.
underwear, outerwear..



[dramatic music]

Oh, what happened
to the world this time?

Looks like a b*mb hit.

Does any of this
ring a bell with you?


Hey! People!

Let's check it out!



Come on, now, let's see
if any of these villagers

can tell us
what is going on.

Pardon me, my good man
but wouldst thou know where

and more importantly,
when we are today?


[all laughing]

Good gravy. Has everyone
around here lost their minds?

[instrumental music]



[instrumental music]

f*re, come out f*re.

Ah! What happened to everyone?

What is wrong with you?
What are you trying to do?

Me try to make f*re
come out of wood.

Ah. Okay, step back.
Watch closely.

[instrumental music]

Yay! Yay!



By order of the Overlord
all fires

is prohibited. The creation of
f*re is a punishable offense.

zap zap zap

Ah! The Overlords machine men!

[all screaming]

Way to go, smart guy.

Now we'll never know
how cool we are

'cause we're all going
to be ionized.

[dramatic music]


zap zap zap

clank clank


[instrumental music]




[music continues]


boom boom boom

[music continues]



[music continues]

Let there be f*re for all!

[crowd cheering]

You see I told you,
I told you.

We were to be cool
in the future.

Did you see those moves?

- 'That wrench.'
- 'That brawn!'

- 'That beard.'
- 'The dome.'


- Hey, yeah, what happened?
- Hey, yeah, what happened?

Dexter! Wow!

[indistinct chatter]

You're as cool
as I always wanted to be.

- Ah? Dexters?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And we traveled
forward in the time

'cause I heard I, I mean,
we saved the future

but he couldn't remember,
so then we went back in time

to find you and we did

and it was awesome.

Time travel, hmm..

You boys will need to be
filled in on a few things.

Yeah, like what happened
to the world?

And who is this
science hoarding Overlord?



Many moons ago,
Mandark and I were employed

by the corporation
as research scientists

to develop new technologies

for the betterment
of the future.

So naturally,
as my genius produced

a fountain of amazing ideas

a not so inspired Mandark

grew more and more jealous.

He began stealing
my creations

and presenting them
as his own.

As you may well remember.


He soon gained favor
with the executive hierarchy

and was quickly promoted up
through the ranks.

And with one diabolical coup

Mandark overthrew
and became the very President

of the corporation himself.

Then darkness fell.

Somehow my most
prized invention

the Neurotomic Protocore
fell into Mandark's clutches.

Oh, my gosh, we left
the core out in my cubicle.

Mandark tried to employ
the powers of the core

but the incompetent fool set
the positive flow to negative.

And now corrupted
energies of the core

began to twist
Mandark's already crooked mind

making him even more greedy,
insane than ever before.

I could take it no more.

To escape the perversion
of my own science

I went underground, literally.

I dug a tunnel
out from Mandark's tower.

For years, I dug and dug
inching my way to freedom.

But while I dug the negative
neurotomic energy

swept the world,
numbing the minds of the people

allowing Mandark
to work his evil tentacles

into every facet of technology
and society.

It was as though
he just reached down

and raked the Earth clean.

Hoarding all science
all knowledge for himself.

When I emerged I found
this world broken and stupid.

I did what I could to help

but with the Overlord's robots
enforcing terror across the land

and very few resources
at my disposal.

It's been a fight
just to survive.

Aw, buck up, hero.

We found the lab
and we can all help.

The laboratory?
I had thought it lost forever.

But with the power of the lab

plus the genius of me
times four equals

the cataclysmic collapse

of the Overlord's
empire of oppression!

- Yeah!
- Yeah!

To the laboratory.

[dramatic music]

[music continues]

I'd like to take this time
to pat myselfs on the back.

Gentlemen, here's to another
greatest work completed.

For tomorrow
we storm the castle!

- Yeah!
- Yeah!

[instrumental music]

[intense music]

[automated message]
Your Overly-lordness,
proximity alarm.

Registered an armed as*ault
vehicle on an att*ck vector.

Imageizer on!

[dramatic music]

'How can this be?
Science is forbidden to all.'

Only I have the knowledge
to construct such a.. Unless..

Micro-scan. Magnify!

'Dexter with Dexter,
Dexter and Dexter.'

This is impossible!

It seems my old nemesis has not
only mysteriously resurfaced

but has also found
a way to enlist

the aid of himself
from other times!

No matter.
Let them come.

I have a few surprises
of my own.


'Mandark's castle is just over
the next ridge.'

This is it, Dexters.
We're going in.

[dramatic music]

[machine g*n f*ring]

boom boom





[intense music]






[music continues]






[music continues]




zap zap zap

boom boom boom

pew pew pew

zap zap zap



Your mechanized minions
are defeated.

Now, it's just you,
me, me, me and me.

So, Dexter, you thought
quadrupling your brain power

would be enough
to defeat me!

Well, I think it's time
to even the playing field.

[dramatic music]


Just like old times, eh?

Yes, quite a reunion but--

Reunion, shmunion!

I want my Neurotomic Protocore

you gluttonous old hack!


- Yeah!
- Yeah!


- Yar!
- Yar!

[dramatic music]

- You old raisin.
- You clod.

- You shmegegge.
- You nincompoop.

You ding dong.

[music continues]




- Grr.
- I oughta..





Oh, my..

[dramatic music]

That's it, if we can reach
the neurotomic flow controls

and set it to positive.

'The protocore
will revert back to normal.'

Undoing the mind-numbing
evil these mad Mandark's

have unleashed.

[dramatic music]



Ow, ow, ow.



No! I've always wanted the core!

No! I stole the core!

No! The core is mine!

No! Just because
I'm bitter and jealous!

[intense music]


clink clink clink



[music continues]


[dramatic music]



Go, Dexter, go. Go, Dexter, go.

Go, Dexter, go! Go, Dexter, go.

- 'Go, Dexter, go.'
- Go, Dexter, go.

- 'Go, Dexter, go.'
- Go, Dexter, go.

- Go, Dexter, go.
- Go, Dexter, go.

- Go, Dexter, go.
- 'Go, Dexter, go.'

- Go, Dexter, go.
- 'Go, Dexter, go.'

- 'Go, Dexter, go.'
- 'Go, Dexter, go.'

Yes. Go, Dexter, go.

Go, Dexter, go.

- Go, Dexter, go.
- 'Go, Dexter, go.'

Go, Dexter, go.
Go, Dexter, go.

- Go, Dexter, go!
- 'Go, Dexter, go.'

Dee Dee.

- Dee Dee!
- Dee Dee!

Dee Dee.

- Dee Dee.
- Dee Dee?

Dee Dee.

Dee Dee!

[comical music]

Ooh, what does
this button do?

[dramatic music]


[siren blaring]


[blaring continues]



[dramatic music]

thump thump


boom boom boom

zap zap zap





[eerie music]

I remember!
I remember!

Dee Dee was the one
who saved the future!

- What? No way!
- That didn't just happen!

I wanted to be the one
who saved the future.

That girl!

I'll teach her to mess up
my future savings.

Yeah, we'll show her.

Ooh, that little ding dong.

I'll get her once and for all.

Robots! Destroy the one
who saved the future!



...that should take
care of Dee Dee.

It looks like the future
is back on track.

I've got a lot of
cleaning up to do

but with a positive
flow of the core

everything should
work out fine.

Well, then, we should be
getting back to our own times.

- Goodbye, Dexter.
- Goodbye, Dexter.

- Goodbye, Dexter.
- Goodbye, Dexter.

- Goodbye, Dexter.
- Goodbye, Dexter.

- Goodbye, Dexter.
- Goodbye, Dexter.

- Goodbye, Dexter.
- Goodbye, Dexter.

- Goodbye, Dexter.
- Goodbye, Billy.

[dramatic music]


Well, that wasn't exactly
what I expected

but I did turn out pretty cool
in the future.

Wait a minute. I'm still here
fighting those robots.

But wait those are the robots
I just built to get Dee Dee

while we're building
the future.

But now, I'm about
to destroy them

before I even decide
to go into the future.

So that means when I came back
I came back too far back

before I ever left.
So I must have come..

No, I..
Or they were..

Oh, forget it.

Time travel hurts my brain.

[instrumental music]

chomp chomp chomp



[theme music]

[music continues]
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