01x06 - The New King

[bunniefuu]

♪ Steppin' softly in a danger zone ♪

♪ No w*apon in my hand ♪

[R-D beeping]

♪ It's just this brain designed by man ♪

♪ It's got me in trouble again ♪

♪ Trouble again ♪

♪ I put my life in jeopardy ♪

♪ In the service of my friends ♪

♪ I wouldn't care
But it's a dangerous affair ♪

♪ 'Cause I'm in trouble again ♪

[R-D whistles]

♪ Trouble again ♪

♪ In trouble, in trouble, in trouble ♪

[rumbling]

[C-PO stammering]

Oh!

And I thought nothing could be worse
than that miserable mining planet.

-[metal clangs]
-[R-D beeps]

[C-PO] Oh!

-Oh!
-[R-D whistles]

[C-PO grunts]

Now we're traipsing off to some
unknown planet to overthrow a dictator.

[beeps]

But if our master wishes to help
Mon Julpa regain his throne,

it is our place to help.

Help!

[crash]

It's all in a day's work.

But my poor circuits won't take
much more of this cargo pilot's abuse.

[rumbling]

Hey, where'd you learn to fly this thing,
a w*r zone?

-You wanna get to Tammuz-an or not?
-Well, you know we do.

Now I know why they
call you "Old Iron Pants."

Lookit, whatever your name is,
I don't think that we should keep--

It's you!

-I never had a chance to thank you for--
-Saving you at the café?

Forget it. Hey, call me Jess.

[C-PO exclaiming]

[C-PO groans]

Uncle Gundy!

You know how I hate good-byes, Jann.

So I thought I'd do it this way.

R-D, this was supposed to be
a private hologram for Master Jann.

[beeps]

That's okay, R.

It's high time I let you go
to find your way in the world.

Do what you have to to help your friend,
but just remember,

if you don't take care of yourself,

-no one's gonna do it for ya.
-No one's gonna do it for ya.

[distorted] For ya-- For ya-- For ya--

[R-D beeps]

Are we there yet?

You're almost home.

I hope we will be in time to stop
Zatec-Cha's coronation, Mon Julpa.

Who's this Zatec-Cha?

An evil vizier, who will claim
my rightful throne if I don't stop him.

It is not too late to turn back, Jann.

We're staying with you,
no matter what happens.

Tammuz-an straight ahead.

Who is it wishes to speak
with the soon-to-be King of Tammuz-an,

-almost grand overlord--
-Silence!

What of the royal scepter?

Do you have it?

Soon. Julpa is bringing it to Tammuz-an.

What?

At dawn tomorrow,

I, Zatec-Cha,
shall become king of Tammuz-an.

But only if I possess the scepter.

Julpa must not interfere.

You will have both the scepter and Julpa.

Don't fail me, IG-.

What's that?

[Sollag] Whoa!

Corsairs.

-What?
-Pirates!

I'll try to hold them off.

Ready…

Now!

I've lost them.

He's right in front of us.

[Sollag] What now?

Take a seat and hang on.
It's gonna get rough.

Move in so I can blast their engines.

[speaks alien language]

Get ready!

-[alarm blaring]
-Destroy it.

[Sollag] They're coming to finish us off!

We're doomed.

R, prepare to disengage.

-[R-D beeps]
-He's already patched in, sir.

Fire!

[Jann] Now!

-[Jessica] Yahoo!
-[C-PO] Good work, R.

After them!

[pirate] Captain Kybo,
someone's attacking us!

[IG-] That should teach them a lesson.

Julpa is mine to capture,
not yours to destroy.

-[Jessica grunts] Ow!
-[Julpa] Jess…

[Jessica moaning]

-How bad is it?
-Cracked ribs.

I slammed against the console
when we rammed them.

She'll need medical attention.

Excuse me, sir,
but I think we have some company.

[speaking Tammuz-an language]

Zatec-Cha's guards.
They want us to identify ourselves.

-We must outrun them.
-Perhaps I can be of some assistance.

[speaking Tammuz-an language]

[speaking Tammuz-an language]

[Jann] What did you tell them, PO?

Well, quite simply, sir,

I said we were emissaries
here for the vizier's coronation.

And that we fell prey to pirates
because of their ineptitude.

And that any further inconvenience
would get back to Zatec-Cha.

Good work, PO.

Deception is not my forte, sir,
but we are ambassadors, of sorts.

[ship approaching]

It is good to be home, Sollag.

You will be safe
in their hands, Mon Julpa?

Yes, Sollag.

Take Jessica to the medical unit,
then meet us at the inn.

Master Jann, wait for me.

-[R-D beeps]
-I will not put a bolt in it.

-I am the dignitary. I go first.
-[R-D beeps]

-What do you mean my shoe is untied?
-[R-D beeps]

R-D, come back here.

It is written,

whoever shall present the royal scepter
to the keeper of the tower

at the time
of the first sun of the equinox

will become
the rightful ruler of Tammuz-an.

That is dawn tomorrow.

Somehow we've got to get through
Zatec-Cha's fortress

and up to the tower by dawn.

There is a secret entrance into
the fortress that my father told me of.

[distant shouting]

What? A spy?

-[spy] Oh!
-I've got to stop him.

Uh-oh.

Julpa, stay here until I get back.

R, PO, go and check on Jess and Sollag.

R-D, you're going the wrong way.

Wait for me!

My scepter.

[Julpa screams]

[man on PA] Attention, all medical staff.

Emergency in Unit D-.

That R has really
gotten himself lost this time.

-Why does this happen to me?
-[child laughs]

[R-D beeping]

R-D, what are you doing?

[beeps]

Never mind your sniveling.
Just follow me and be quiet.

-[crash]
-Oh, my.

Oh, uh-- uh, let me help you.

Uh, it was partially my fault.

I'm a medical droid.

I must distribute this food
to the patients.

Let me have it, tin head.

There's no need for that sort of language.

Give it to me!

If you insist.

[medical droid] Whoa!

R, I-- I think you should--

R, wait for me!

[medical droid] Come back here!

What?

[screams]

-[crash]
-[metal clanging]

No, we cannot ask
for information at the desk.

I'll think of another plan
to locate Mistress Jessica.

Mistress Jessica and Sollag left ages ago,

under escort of the vizier's guards.

[beeps, whistles]

We must warn Master Jann and Prince Julpa.

[medical droid] Hello, tin head.

Help! R!

I'll get you!

[gasps]

-[spy exclaims]
-[Jann] Gotcha!

-[aliens growling]
-[Jann] What?

I have got you, and Zatec-Cha has Julpa.
[laughing]

[C-PO] Admit it, R,
you've gotten us lost again.

Excuse me,
but do you know how to get to the ne--

-[R-D beeps]
-Master Jann!

-[alien ] Hey!
-[spy grunts]

-[R-D beeping]
-[spy grunting]

-[alien grunts]
-[spy] Oh!

[alien grunts]

[grunts]

-[alien growling]
-[R-D beeps]

[alien ] Huh?

[groans]

[all grunt]

[spy groaning]

They've got Julpa.

And Jessica and Sollag.

We haven't got much time.

Two hours and thirteen minutes
to be precise, sir.

-[R-D beeps]
-Oh, don't follow R, sir.

He would get lost in an elevator.

At last. The royal scepter.

Once I place it on the tower,

the sun's rays will pronounce me king
of all Tammuz-an.

You have lost, Julpa.

Bow to your new master.

I bow only to the will of my people.

Down!

As to your friends,
they've been taken care of.

[door opens]

[spy] They got away.

You fools!

[all groan]

But you won't escape.

[beast wails]

Something has been bothering
my pet lately.

Perhaps it is his diet.

You could convince him to eat.

Vinga, take him to the pit!

You may enjoy this, my dear.

A little prelude to my coronation.

-[creaking]
-I, um, think we should try another door.

According to Julpa,
there are no other doors.

Oh, my! What?

Don't overwork your circuits, PO.

Nothing down here has worked in centuries.

-I think we should split up.
-[C-PO] Very well.

-[screams]
-[R-D shrieks]

Oh! Oh! [screams]

Oh, no!

R, quick!

[beeps]

Perhaps we should stick together.

[both scream]

[beeps]

[beeps, whistles]

[R-D beeping, whistles]

[R-D beeps]

[Jann gasps]

[C-PO] Whoa!

Here we go again.

[screams]

[Jann] Quick, out there.

[C-PO] Oh! Oh, my.

[splashes]

[R-D beeps, whistles]

Oh, my frazzled circuits.

Wow!

[C-PO] Lava?

Zatec-Cha has quite a playground.

-[grunts] Take him out of there!
-Let her go. She's no part of this.

You command nothing.

I'll do as I please with her
or any of your loyal subjects.

[Vinga yelps]

-[beast growling]
-[Julpa exclaims]

[growling continues]

[blaster fires]

I think we are safe in here,
don't you, Master Jann?

-[rumbling]
-No.

Neither do I.

There must be a shutdown mechanism.

-Perhaps one of these stones.
-[whirring]

-The floor!
-[rumbling continues]

[gasps] Sorry, sir.

R, do something! Hurry!

[grunting]

[electronic buzz]

They can't take the stress. Hold on, PO.

[R-D beeping]

[Jann] Good work.

Let's go, PO.

If you insist.

[beast growling]

When the durkiis are soothed,
they are very docile.

But when they are angry,
there is no beast in all of Tammuz-an

that can match their viciousness.

-[C-PO] I take it all back, R.
-[durkii growling]

You're the one that always
knows where you're going.

I should've known better
than to follow you, you near-sighted--

[laughs]

What do we do now, sir?

-I wish I knew, PO.
-[durkii growling]

[Zatec-Cha] Welcome to the pit.

[laughing]

[growling]

[Jessica grunting]

Jann!

[durkii growling]

[C-PO] Whoa!

I would like to stay and watch,
but I am well-aware of the outcome.

Perhaps you would prefer
another form of entertainment.

Come, you shall witness
history in the making.

-My coronation.
-[durkii growls]

Bring her!

Let me go! Jann? Jann!

-[laughing]
-[Zatec-Cha] Vinga!

-[R-D beeping]
-[C-PO yelps]

-Julpa!
-[durkii growls]

[beeps]

[screams]

-[durkii growling]
-I'm finish--

-[Jann shouts]
-[C-PO] Save me!

[beeping]

[exclaiming]

[electricity crackles]

[durkii grunts]

[durkii purring]

[R-D beeping]

[Jann] What happened?

Kleex.

Aah! Your droid relieved the durkii
of these insect pests.

-[kleex chirring]
-[durkii purring]

R-D, stop playing with
that hideous thing and get us out of here.

[beeps]

[beeps]

Oh. Thank you, sir.

-[R-D beeps]
-[durkii purring]

No, R, you cannot keep him.

[R-D whimpers]

[Jessica shouts]

[Zatec-Cha] Hurry!

The sun will soon be in position.

I must have the scepter in place

-at the precise moment.
-[Jessica] Let me go!

Oh!

[aliens shouting]

Stop them!

Watch out!

[beeping]

[exclaims]

Oh, my! [exclaims]

[alien shouts]

Oh, no!

[Jessica] Got it!

No!

[laughing]

Whoo-hoo!

Ooh!

Thank you.

[C-PO exclaiming]

[R-D beeps]

I'm trying, but what--

-Which button? What device, R?
-[R-D beeps]

-I think I have it now.
-[R-D beeps]

[R-D beeps]

Hang on, R!

What?

[engine hissing]

Julpa! Catch!

[laughing]

-[gasps]
-[R-D beeping]

[exclaims]

Huh? Aah!

[screams]

[shouting]

[stammering]

Stand still!

[Vinga yelps]

Oh, my!

-My goodness.
-[R-D beeping]

[aliens shouting]

-[crash]
-How unfortunate.

We only have moments left
to get the scepter to Julpa, R.

I'm putting this thing on fast forward.

[R-D beeps]

[engine spluttering]

[Vinga grunts]

[Zatec-Cha] Vinga! Bring it to me!

I am here, oh, Keeper of the Tower!

Vinga, hurry!

Guards!

[exclaims]

Bailing out!

-[C-PO screams]
-[Vinga grunts]

[laughs]

Seize them!

No!

-[skiff approaches]
-Wait!

[Zatec-Cha exclaims]

Vinga!

[Jessica grunting]

No!

Go, Julpa!

Hail, Mon Julpa, king of Tammuz-an.

[C-PO] Hooray! Hail, Mon Julpa!

And not a moment too soon.

Vinga, you fool!

-[Jann] PO!
-[Jessica] R!

-Good work, R.
-[R-D whistles]

[groans]

[grunts]

Hail, Zatec-Cha, king of Tammuz-an.

Take them away.

You've not seen the last of me, Julpa!

I have spies!

Spies that will finish you for good!

[C-PO exclaims]

-Next time, R, you get on top.
-[R-D beeps]

And for your help, Jann Tosh,
as king of Tammuz-an,

I appoint you adviser to the court
of Julpa of Tammuz-an.

I shall serve you well, Mon Julpa,
as your friend.

Always as friend,
first and foremost, Jann.

And I have arranged for a new ship
and an escort for you, Jessica Meade,

whenever you wish.

I plan on sticking around here
for a while.

It's not often Old Iron Pants gets
a chance to rub elbows with royalty.

[laughs] And besides, somebody still
owes me for the flight here.

I am glad that we both received
the same honors, R.

Even tough I am much more
useful as a courtier than you are.

And besides which,
you couldn't tell a ban from a bantha.

[R-D beeping]

What is the meaning of this?
Unhand those noble sirs.

[C-PO gasps]

Let that be a lesson to you, R.

Appearances can be deceiving.

[R-D beeping]

You'll never get by as a court adviser
with a vocabulary like that.

-[R-D buzzes]
-Well, I never.