01x10 - Tail of the Roon Comets

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Star Wars: Droids". Aired: September 7, 1985 – June 7, 1986.*
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Droids follows the adventures of R2-D2 and C-3PO as they face off against gangsters, criminals, pirates, bounty hunters, the Galactic Empire and other threats.
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01x10 - Tail of the Roon Comets

Post by bunniefuu »

Steppin' softly in a danger zone

No w*apon in my hand

[R-D beeping]

It's just this brain designed by man

It's got me in trouble again

Trouble again

I put my life in jeopardy

In the service of my friends

I wouldn't care
But it's a dangerous affair

'Cause I'm in trouble again

[R-D whistles]

Trouble again

In trouble, in trouble, in trouble

[stormtrooper] He must not escape us.

Search everywhere.

If you don't mind my saying so,
Master Mungo,

I don't think this is a safe place
for man or droid.

That fellow over there, for instance.

He looks like the sort who would just as
soon carbon-freeze you as look at you.

Oh, my! He's coming over here.

Relax, PO. That's Krox.
He's the one we're here to see.

[beeping]

Good to see you again, Krox.

I take it you have what I want.

What you and everyone else wants, Mungo.

I've been one step ahead of
Imperial stormtroopers all day.

Let's finish the deal
so I can blow this planet.

-[chattering]
-[kitchenware clanging]

At last. The map to the Roon system.

[beeping]

-[upbeat music playing]
-[C-PO] Really, R.

-This is no time to dance.
-[R-D beeping]

[beeping continues]

Uh-oh.

Trouble.

Nice doing business with you.

See you around.

[C-PO] Oh, dear.
Now what do we do, Master Mungo?

Keep calm.
Maybe they're not looking for us.

You're under arrest
in the name of the Emperor.

Then again, I could be wrong.

[beeping]

[whistling]

Come with us.

[squeaking]

-[wailing]
-[stormtroopers exclaiming]

R is jamming their audio amplifiers.
Let's go!

[beeping]

-[wailing continues]
-[exclaiming continues]

After them!

The Emperor wants that map.

[Mungo] PO! R! Follow me!

Halt!

[R-D beeping]

Hang on.

[R-D beeping]

[C-PO] Oh, dear.

[C-PO exclaiming]

-[R-D beeping]
-[Mungo] We lost them.

-Next stop, the Baobab Archives.
-[R-D beeps]

Now, let's see what we've got.

What's it say, PO?

[C-PO] These are coordinates
for the Roon system, sir.

According to this hologram,

it is hidden in a dust cloud
called "The Cloak of Sith."

Great.

The rainbow comets pass by Manda
once every season

on their way to the Roon system.

If we can find
information on their course,

we can use it to lead us there.

Um, if I may suggest, sir,

it might be easier to find the information
by talking to the archivist droid.

I'm sure he's around--

Ah! There he is.

Excuse me.

My master is looking for information
on the Roon comet.

Do you think--

Aaah!

Aaah!

[C-PO grunting]

[R-D beeps]

[Mungo] That's it, R.

The astrogation coordinates
for the rainbow comets. Record them.

-You, I take it, are the archivist?
-[droid beeps]

I must tell you that I find your
catalog system less than satisfactory.

-[R-D whistling, beeping]
-[C-PO] Excuse me.

[droid beeping]

[C-PO] Good news, Master.

I found the archivist.

I'm sure he can direct us
to the information.

[beeping]

-What do you mean you've already found it?
-[R-D chirps]

Let's go, PO.

But sir, don't you think we should
ask the archivist just to make sure?

Not that I don't have complete faith
in R's data retrieval circuits.

If I'm not being too inquisitive, sir,
just why is this Roon system so important?

Roonstones, PO.

And we're going to be the first
to open a trade route to it.

[beeping]

Oh, no. Not another space voyage.

Excuse me. I just remembered
I have a previous engagement.

[whistles, beeps]

-[metal squeaking]
-[C-PO] Oh. Oh!

Well, I suppose it can wait
until we get back.

Admiral Screed, this probe droid
has just returned from the Cloak of Sith.

Excellent.

Now we will learn
if there are any systems worth conquering

in that cloud of cosmic dust.

Activate it.

Greetings to the Emperor

from Governor Koong
of Tawntoom province, planet Roon.

I wish to extend to you
the warmest welcome.

There are many reasons why Roon
would make a valuable ally to the Empire.

I make you a gift of one of them.

A Roonstone.

The most valuable gem in the galaxy.

I look forward to dealing with the Empire.

We shall deal with you, Koong,
however we see fit.

I have programmed directions
into this probe droid.

Deprogram it.

Set course for
the Cloak of the Sith immediately.

Roonstones.

[C-PO] Oh, how I hate space travel.

But perhaps it will be
an uneventful voyage.

This Roon system
may be a very peaceful place.

[R-D beeping]

Well, if you don't agree,
I don't want to hear it.

Maybe by opening up a new trade route,

we can save my father's merchant fleet
from financial ruin.

All the same, sir.
I have a bad feeling about this.

You have a bad feeling
about everything, PO.

Look! The rainbow comets.

We've timed their orbits perfectly.

They'll take us right to the Roon system.

[Mungo] Just as I thought.

The comets' light will lead us
safely through the asteroid field.

[R-D beeping]

[C-PO] But only if one of those asteroids
doesn't hit us.

PO, you worry too much.

R is perfectly capable
of dodging those asteroids. Right, R?

[R-D beeping]

-[C-PO exclaims]
-[Mungo] Hey! Whoa!

[R-D beeping slowly]

-[Mungo] Nothing's working.
-[alarm blaring]

That jolt must've paralyzed
our stabilizers.

Now that is what comes
from over-confidence, R.

[R-D beeps slowly]

Oh, no! We're heading right for
that radioactive cloud.

We're doomed!

[C-PO] R, do something, quick!

[R-D beeping]

The radiation in that ion cloud
will be deadly for Master Mungo.

Not to mention
what it will do to our circuits.

[beeps]

There must be something
in this databank that can help us.

There's only one chance.

If I can just get the aft thrusters
aimed at the cloud,

we might be able to blast our way through.
It worked!

I can't find anything
in these databanks to help.

-We're doomed! We--
-We're safe, PO.

We are?

We're safe. Hurrah!

R, readjust those stabilizers.
We've got to get back in the comets' tail.

[beeping]

Master Mungo, surely you don't mean
to continue with this,

I must say, reckless plan?

[Mungo] Of course.

[C-PO] I should've guessed.

I think we've found something.

The sensors show a planetary system
within that dust cloud.

PO, this may be
what we've been looking for.

New worlds open before us.

What wonders will we see.

I think we're about to find out.

[beeps]

-[C-PO] Goodness!
-[R-D beeps]

[R-D beeping]

My sentiments exactly.

Sir, what is it?

Whatever it is,
it's got us in a tractor beam.

It's gigantic.

[tractor beam pulsating]

We're being pulled into its mouth.

[C-PO] Oh, my!

-[whirring]
-[clangs]

[Mungo] Remember, just keep calm
and let me do the talking.

[R-D whistling]

-[Koong] Greetings.
-[R-D beeps]

[C-PO] Quiet, R.

Welcome to the new Umboo Lightstation.

Sorry about the tractor beam.

We just wanted to make sure
you're docked without trouble.

-We're honored to play host to emissaries…
-[R-D beeps]

…from the Empire.

Master Mungo,

-they seem to think that we are em--
-I know.

Thank you,
but I'm afraid we are not emissaries.

-That is, not exactly.
-[C-PO] Whoa.

We're here more as, uh, observers.

Quit slouching, droid.

Hmm!

Governor, they are not quite
what I expected Imperial emissaries to be.

[whispering] Quiet, Gaff.
You'll offend them.

Allow me to show you around.

As you'll see, I have much here
that will interest the Empire.

-[C-PO exclaiming]
-[R-D beeping]

Oh.

Oh, my!

[R-D beeps]

-It gets better.
-[C-PO exclaims]

Aaah!

Oh, no!

See.

Welcome to the heart of my operation.

[Koong] Behold the treasures
of the Empire's system.

All mine.

This is where I store crates of Nergon-.

There are many interested parties

that would pay an Imperial ransom
for that rare expl*sive.

And they do.

I assure you
our business here is quite profitable.

[creatures babbling]

These are Mupples.

A prized delicacy. Very valuable.

And soon... [chuckles] ...even greater
treasures of cargo will be mine.

Riches beyond compare.

Free of charge.

Sir, I believe these ruffians
are nothing more than pirates.

We should take our leave immediately.

-[Mupples babbling]
-[R-D beeping]

[babbling continues]

[R-D beeps]

[growling]

Watch it, you little rust bucket.

[C-PO] As I was saying, sir.

If we try to leave now,
we may give ourselves away.

-[C-PO] Look!
-Huh?

[Mupples babbling]

Let go of me, you space pirates!

You think you're hot stuff, huh?

Well, the Empire doesn't rule
the Cloak of Sith yet.

I apologize for
that prisoner's bad behavior.

Would you like to have him mind-flogged?

Uh, no, thanks.

Who is he?

Just an old man who used to be in charge
of the old Umboo Lightstation,

before I closed it down.

This is the new Umboo Lightstation.

And its duty is to make me rich.

Governor Koong, look.

[Koong] An Imperial shuttle.

Greetings from the Emperor.

I am Admiral Screed.

But if you are
the Emperor's representative,

then-- then who are the--

Impostors!

Stop them!

-Shall we leave now, sir?
-[R-D beeps]

-Take them.
-[stormtroopers grumbling]

-[Mungo] Quick.
-[C-PO] Aaah!

[C-PO exclaims]

[Mungo] Hey!

[R-D beeping]

Oh, my.

Now stay there. [exclaims]

-[stormtrooper] Halt!
-[C-PO] Wait for me!

[Mungo] We've lost them.

-Screed!
-[C-PO exclaims]

[R-D beeping]

So we meet again, Baobab.

[Mungo] Not for long.

Don't waste your energy.

-[Mungo] In here!
-[R-D beeping]

-[R-D screeching]
-[stormtroopers grunt]

[Mungo] Good work, R.

Now what, sir? [gasps] Over there!

-[whirring]
-And there!

[whirring]

-[Mungo] Get down!
-[R-D beeps]

[C-PO grunts]

[C-PO] Whoa!

-[C-PO] Which way?
-Uh-oh.

There they are.

[Mungo] Split up!

Trapped.

At least the stormtroopers
don't know where I am.

[Gaff] They don't.

But I do.

[cackling]

[grunts]

[C-PO] No, this way, R.

[R-D whistling, beeping]

Don't be foolish, R.
That way will lead us right back to them.

-We want to go this way.
-[R-D beeping]

Of course, I could be wrong.

Demobilize them.

-[C-PO] Oh, no!
-[R-D screeching]

[C-PO] We're being--

-[R-D beeping slower]
-Our power… is shutting down.

[R-D beeps]

[stormtrooper] Admiral Screed
has plans for them.

[stormtrooper] The droids are shut down,
Admiral Screed.

And so is this one.

He'll be out for several hours.

Good work, Gaff.

Let's find out who he is.

[Screed] No need to search him.

He is Mungo Baobab
of the Baobab Merchant Company.

The Emperor has been looking for him
for some time.

[laughs] Just a case
of mistaken identity, Admiral.

Please accept this Baboobab fellow
as a, shall we say, servant of the Empire.

[Screed] Throw him in that cage.

[Mupples babbling]

And as for you…

R, look out!
Those stormtroopers are going to fire.

Oh, dear!

I-I surrender.

[beeping]

You can keep the R unit, Koong.

But I can use this protocol droid.

-Prepare him for reprogramming.
-[C-PO clattering]

Yes, sir.

Reprogramming? Oh, no, thank you.

-I'm quite happy with the way I am now.
-[R-D beeping, whistling]

-Come on, rust bucket.
-[R-D chirps]

Hmm. That's nice.

Hmm. What?

Yuck. What's going on here?
Get away from me. Get away.

Go on. b*at it.

[man] That's not the way
to handle Mupples.

-[Mupples babbling]
-[Mungo groans]

And just how do you handle them?

Like this.

[whistling]

Phew. Thanks, um…

Noop's the name.

Noop Yeldarb.

I guess I had you figured wrong.

Thought you was
part of Koong's rotten plan.

[C-PO] Stop! Master, help!

They're going to reprogram me.

You can't do this.

[Gaff] Oh, yes we can.

Any preferences as to a new name?

You'll need one to go with your
new behavioral circuitry matrix.

Well, I've always been partial to--

Oh, dear. What am I saying?

R! Master Mungo! Help!

[R-D screeching]

-[R-D beeping]
-R! PO!

It's all my fault.

If I hadn't been so headstrong,
we wouldn't be in this mess.

-[machine whirring]
-[electricity hums]

You may attempt to convince me
that your petty pirating operation

is worth something to the Empire.

You wound me, Admiral.

Our plan has worked perfectly
and will continue to work.

Uh, by the way,
we prefer "salvaging" to "pirating."

Ever since Gaff closed down
the old Umboo Lightstation,

on my orders,

we've been luring trade ships
to destruction with our false beacons.

Soon all the wealth
of the Roon system will be mine.

You mean ours, Governor Koong.

Master Mungo, help! R!

[exclaims]

We've got to do something.
Can't you think of a way to help PO?

Sure. Lots of them.

Unfortunately, they all
hinge on us not being in here.

[whistles]

Move it, droid.

-[R-D beeping]
-[stormtrooper coughing]

[stormtrooper] Hey! [coughing]

I think he blew a circuit.

[coughing continues]

[R-D screeching]

What's going on here?

R. Am I glad to see you.

-[R-D beeping]
-[Gaff grumbling]

[beeps]

Look out!

We're free! Good work, R.

[R-D beeping]

Let's move.

Don't let them get away.

Down there.

-Nice hat, PO.
-[electricity stops]

-Look out!
-[C-PO gasps]

[Gaff] Stop them!

-[R-D beeping]
-[C-PO] Here we go again!

[R-D beeps]

-[Mungo] Hey!
-[C-PO] R, look out!

[R-D beeping]

Those boxes are full of Nergon-!

[Noop] Whoa!

[C-PO] It might… explode!

The Nergon-.

Don't let those boxes fall on the engines.

[Noop laughing] That'll slow 'em down.

[R-D beeping]

[Mungo] Everybody in?

[beeping]

Fools!

They're getting away!

[both exclaim]

Explosions?

The engines are breaking down.

We're moving into the asteroid belt.

We'll crash.

-[R-D beeping]
-[Mungo] That way.

We're not out of this yet.

[stormtroopers shouting]

Hey, fellas. Catch!

[all exclaiming]

[Koong] My men
will have everything under control.

Abandon ship!

Is this how you run a salvaging operation?

A minor setback, Admiral.
Let's get out of here.

[Screed] Take Baobab's ship.
I know it's fast.

[Gaff] All personnel have abandoned ship,
Governor Koong.

Except for Baobab and his friends.

Come on! We'll have to take Koong's ship.

The pirates may have escaped,

but at least their operation is over.

[Mupple babbling]

Why do these alien life forms
find me so irresistible?

[beeps]

[Koong laughs nervously]

Uh, now, Admiral,
don't do anything you might regret.

I won't regret it, Koong, but you will.

Throw them in the brig.

[Koong] But without me, you won't find
the source of the Roonstones.

[Noop on comm] Thanks for all your help,
Mungo.

If there's anything I can do…

There is.

You can tell us where the Roon system is.

Master Mungo, you still mean to continue
searching for Roonstones?

We have no choice, PO.

This cloudcraft won't make it back
to Manda.

If the Roon system isn't close by,
we're stuck here.

Oh, it's close by, all right.

Just look.

[Noop laughs]

Welcome to the Roon system.

I found it!

I'll establish a trade route
for the Baobab Merchant Fleet yet.

[C-PO] I'm afraid I still have
a bad feeling about it, sir,

but maybe all the surprises are over now.

[Mungo] Maybe they are.

PO, get the astrogation charts.

Certainly, sir.
They should be in this compartment.

Aaah!

-[Mupples babbling]
-[Mungo laughs]

Then again, maybe not.

[R-D beeps]

-R-D, do something.
-[babbling continues]

[R-D beeping]

Oh, no, what next?

[R-D beeping]
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