02x21 - Lax

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Lilo & Stitch". Aired: September 20, 2003 – July 29, 2006.*
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Continuing where Stitch! The Movie left off, Lilo and Stitch are given the task of collecting the rest of Jumba's missing experiments, changing them from bad to good, and finding the one place where they truly belong.
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02x21 - Lax

Post by bunniefuu »

Tookie bah waba!

Hao!

Iki bah bah.

Ha ha ha.

♪ I Laila 'o kaua'i la ♪

♪ no malihini ohana ♪

♪ welcome, cousins,
a-come on by ♪

♪ aloha, e komo mai ♪

Maka maka.

♪ I Laila 'o kaua'i la ♪

♪ no malihini ohana ♪

♪ welcome, cousins,
a-come on by ♪

♪ aloha, e komo mai ♪

♪ aloha, e komo mai ♪

Heh heh ha ha ha!

Ah heh heh heh heh heh heh heh!

♪ Iki tookie nee hi! ♪

♪ Iki tookie nee hi! ♪

♪ Aka tiki bah bah ♪

♪ aka tiki bah bah ♪

♪ gabba ika tasoopa? ♪

♪ Gabba ika tasoopa? ♪

Ooocha! Chi-ka!

♪ Miki miki coconut ♪

♪ I Laila 'o kaua'i la ♪

♪ no malihini ohana ♪

♪ welcome, cousins,
a-come on by ♪

♪ aloha, e komo mai ♪

Tookie bah waba!

♪ Aloha, e komo mai ♪

Ah heh heh heh heh!

♪ Aloha, e komo mai ♪

Bao!

Lilo!

Kitchen! Now!

We're already here.

Stitch and I cooked
up our latest recipe.

Want some?

What I want is for this mess

to be cleaned up
before I get home!

I guess we did make
a pretty big mess.

Unh.

We probably should clean it up.

Do you feel like cleaning?

Naga.

Me, neither.

But I know someone
who loves to clean.

Hee hee hee!

Pleakley, we need your help.

Stitch and I are
totally unprepared

for this cleaning thing.

We hate it.

Enh! Hate it.

But cleaning can be fun.

You just have to
make a game out of it.

For example, see how many
plates you can wash in an hour.

By the fifth or sixth hour,

you'll probably have
doubled your productivity.

Uh, yeah.

See, that's why you
should clean up the kitchen.

It's your passion.

Well, all right.

Let's take a look at this mess.

Ohh!

Aah!

Guess we'll have
to clean it ourselves.

Ready for a break?

Eh.

Oh, no!

We forgot about pleakley!

Come on, stitch, let's
get him onto the couch.

Unh!

Stitch?

Stitch, pleakley's
still on the floor.

You gotta help me
move him out of the way.

Naga.

Naga?

This is weird.

Is definitely very
UN- behavior.

Could be work of .

?

You mean, a new experiment?

Is designed to cause entire
population of city to stop work.

Police, army, garbage collector.

Now is easy for invading.

I wonder how many
people he's zapped already?

Could be dozens. Hundreds.

Perhaps thousands!

Could be end of world
as we are knowing it!

Ha ha ha.

Jumba will write
journal of catastrophe.

I'm back, everybody.

I was just so
shocked and disgusted

by the abject
filth in the kitchen

that all the blood
left my brain.

But now I've got a second wind,

and I'm ready to clean!

Now, who wants to help?

Ooh, look at that pretty flower.

Chapter one...

Happily ever after.

The end.

Pleakley? Jumba? What happened?

Work is finished.

Time now for relaxing.

Hee hee hee!

You! You did this!

Whoa!

He's getting away!
Come on, stitch!

You might be on vacation,

but you're still coming with me!

Come on, stitch.

If we don't stop him,
he'll turn the whole island

all lackadaisical.

Come on.

Young man, I'd like my
bags taken up to my room.

Young man! Wake up!

Everybody's turning into
mellowtrons or something.

Watch it! Coming through!

Last one in the pool

is a rotten Bologna sandwich
crawling with maggots!

Well, almost everyone.

Wait, spinelli! I hate Bologna!

And chlorine turns
my hair green!

And maggots are icky!

Tourists.

Come on, stitch. Stitch?

We really should be heading
over to the observatory.

Come on, gretch.

Don't be such a wet
blanket, for crying out loud.

We're on vacation here.
Let's have some fun!

Actually, spinelli, none
of you are here for leisure.

As you recall, t.J. Convinced
the unit of concerned brainy kids

that you should all
escort me to kauai

as my astronomy assistants.

Yeah. Good one, teej.

Hey, I'd say just about anything

for a chance to
goof off in paradise.

Indeed.

Our locale brings to
mind the great John Milton,

whose epic paradise lost

I intend to read cover to
cover during our sojourn here.

Hey, has anyone
seen my fruity drink?

It's the one with
the paper umbrella.

Aah! Some weird
monkey has my drink!

Stitch, give the nice boy
back his pineapple pizzazz!

Sorry about that.

My dog's got some
personal space issues.

Hey, you're a local kid.

What do you do
for fun on this rock?

Um, well, lots of stuff.

"Of Eden, where
delicious paradise,

now nearer, crowns with
her enclosure green..."

And fruity drinks reign supreme.

I penned that last part.

Hoo chi fah.

Oh, no!

What in the name of
finster's support hose

just happened?

He's here! Everybody duck!

Who's here?

Um, my other... Pet.

His name is... Lax.

He got loose, and
I've got to catch him

before he zaps anyone else.

Lax? Zaps?

You see, gretch?

The real excitement
isn't up in space.

It's right here, on
good old planet earth.

, can't you hear the
container computer blaring?

Yup. Didn't want to
disturb your private time.

You always notify me when another
experiment has been activated.

Warning, experiment
activated.

Causes enemies to abandon work.

Hey, hey. There's
one you don't need.

You never work.

Oh, sorry.

I mean, you never get paid.

'Cause you never
catch any experiments.

Hmm. Once hamsterviel's
locator satellite is online,

those days will be
a distant memory.

Locator satellite?

That is correct, you lazy
yet culinarily inclined mutant.

It is my latest
technological brainstorm,

and it should be
ready very soon.

Ha ha ha!

Once it is,

finding any activated experiment

will be as easy as
stealing food pellets

from a baby, don't ya know?

Ha ha ha!

Well, what are you waiting for?

Go capture that
experiment, fishy fish.

The satellite isn't
working just yet.

So? Until it is operational,

you hunt experiments
the old-fashioned way.

What, badly?

Yes, sir.

Don't hurry back.

I'm gonna be kicking it
and listening to tunes.

See here, spinelli,

I hardly think the mischief
of some bizarre pet

outweighs the possible discovery

of a new planet.

Using the island's
high-powered telescope,

I hope to prove that the object

I saw from my garage
observatory was...

Incredibly boring.

No offense, gretch,
but we're on vacation.

We'd have more fun chasing
down lax for Lulu over here.

It's lilo,

and stitch and I can
catch him ourselves.

It's like our job.

There he is! He's
up in that tree!

Hey, you dumb zapper.

You can't outrun Vince lasalle.

I'll shimmy up
there and grab him.

Somebody say
ready, set... chill.

That fiend!

What's he done to our pal?

He'll be ok.

He's not hurt or anything.

He's just sort
of... On vacation.

Look, lilo, I don't know what
kind of creature that is up there,

but it zapped two of my friends,

don't worry, stitch
and I will catch him.

Um, your stitch is on vacation.

You're gonna need
reinforcements.

But I can't be
responsible for your safety.

Hey, no problem.

That's what finster's for.

What's a finster?

Miss finster, our
faculty chaperone.

A lot of good she'll do us.

She hasn't left the spa

since we got to the hotel.

Oh, Rolf.

Nobody can massage
that deep tissue like you.

Rolf me, baby! Rolf me!

Ung!

Oh, mister, you
just doubled your tip.

All right, let's do this.

I'm t.J.

That's Vince, spinelli,
Gus, Gretchen,

and Mikey's on the raft.

Ha ha ha!

San zup! Vap! Vap! Vap!

We gotta figure
out how to catch him

without getting
zapped ourselves.

Yeah. If I get any
lazier than I already am,

I'll forget to breathe.

Hey!

Hey, what you kids
doing down there?

Keep moving,
mister. Keep moving.

Hey, you don't
have to tell me twice.

If I don't get this food
out to the cabana,

my boss is gonna eat me for...

Ah, lunch!

Gretchen, I've
scoured my databanks,

and I haven't found
any record of a creature

that can focus a beam of energy

that causes one to stop working.

It's astounding.

Indeed, Galileo.

It strikes me as
very odd, as well.

Lilo, if I may be so bold,

this creature isn't, well,

of this earth, is it?

Well, not exactly.

I knew aliens
existed! I just knew it!

Please, Gus, we kind of try

to keep a lid on the whole
"aliens on earth" thing.

So what's the plan, lilo?

I think I have an idea.

Um, do you mind?

Oh, that's weird.
I really don't.

I can use this to
deflect lax's ray,

but I could use a diversion.

Good thinking.
Spinelli, let's go.

Aye, aye, teej.

Go! Go! Go!

Lilo, forget it! Lax is down!

He's heading for
the golf course!

I don't know what got
into that caddy of ours.

Imagine, making us
carry our own clubs.

Sorry!

There's lax!

And there's stitch!
Stop him, stitch!

Your sh*t.

Where are you, trog?

Ow!

Hmm, satellite's
still not online. Huh?

He cut right in front of me.

Arrest him!

Me? You were speeding, lady!

Work it out, brother.
I'm on a break.

A long break.

has been here.

The satellite! It's online!

It looks like it's the end of
the line for the cart, guys.

Aba tooka!

How fortuitous!

He's led us directly
to the observatory.

Perhaps we could throw
the creature off balance

by rotating the
building underneath it.

A rotating building? Cool!

Be still my heart.

The stellarscope b.

Isn't she beautiful?

Uh, yeah.

How do we move the building?

Get ready to catch him!

Ha ha ha!

It's not working.

Come on, teej, me and you.

Guys! No!

As long as I'm here,

it can't hurt to try to
make some observations.

Declination, plus .

Right ascension, minus .

Oh, my gosh! There it is!

Lilo, come look at a new
planet in our solar system.

New planet?

Does this thing have a focus?

Here.

That's no planet.

That's a
gerbil-shaped satellite.

A what now?

A satellite. Gerbil-shaped.

With words on the side.

"Hands off, loser life form.

"Experiment locator.

"Property of Dr. J.
V. Hamsterviel.

"P.s. This satellite
is not gerbil-shaped,

it is hamster-shaped."

Let me see that!

Loser life form is right.

Some discovery I made.

It is important.

Hamsterviel is an
evil alien rodent.

We've gotta take it down.

I was under the impression

you islanders were easy-going.

Stitch, I know
you're on vacation,

but I need you!

Gus?

I tried to stop
'em! I really did!

Hey, teej, I found
another pretty pink shell.

The two of them,

they just lost their heads!

They didn't stand a chance.

They didn't stand a chance!

Hee hee hee!

Aah! Aah!

If we can't figure out a way

to destroy hamsterviel's
evil satellite circling earth,

he'll be able to
capture and control

hundreds of alien experiments.

And at that point, Gus,

I don't think any of
us stand a chance.

Take that, you
sand castle builders!

Get 'em!

Hamsterviel's about
to take over the galaxy,

and everybody's on vacation.

Looks like it's up to us three

to stop that satellite.

But how?

Lax has got us trapped
in this observatory.

Perhaps Galileo has some ideas.

Actually, Gretchen,

I've been searching
online scientific libraries,

and I've begun to
develop a plan of action.

Watch out!

Thankfully the fall doesn't seem to
have damaged Galileo's processor.

Galileo, you were just
about to tell us your plan.

Don't ask me. I'm
clocked out, babe.

Hey, did you know I have
solitaire loaded on here?

Galileo never calls you babe.

My computer's on
vacation now, too.

But that's impossible.

Unless...

Unless the ray works
on machines, too.

And that gives me an idea.

If we could get lax to fire
his ray through that telescope,

it might make the
satellite go on vacation.

It's certainly worth a try.

It will require some
sophisticated calculations,

which, thanks to lax
having disabled Galileo,

I must now do by hand.

Now all we gotta
do is catch lax.

Whoa! Aah!

Hey! Whoa!

Hey, guys!

Who wants to play lax golf?

It's a new game. It's fun.

The object is to hit golf balls

at the alien experiment up
on top of the observatory.

First kid to knock
him off the roof wins!

Obviously, that
kid's gonna be me.

Ha ha!

Excuse me.

Fore!

Huh?

Thank you.

It's ok, don't be scared.

We just wanna
catch you and use you

to make an evil
satellite go on vacation.

Lilo, I've very
nearly figured out

the vectors we'll need
to disable the satellite.

No!

Oh, my.

Gretchen, please tell me

you finished the
calculations before...

Before you... no,
I'm afraid I haven't.

We're doomed.

But it shouldn't take
me very much longer.

I just need to tweak
these coordinates a bit.

But you got zapped by lax.

Don't you wanna give up
doing any work and goof off?

Gracious, no!

For me, work is fun.

Work... fun?

If one views their work as fun,

one's life is more
rewarding, less stressful.

Akin to, well, recess.

Like turning an experiment
hunt into a golf game.

Help! Help!

Hey, lax! Over here!

Uh-oh.

Aka tookie!

Stitch, you saved me!

Yeah! Big fun!

People, we had better move

if we want to
destroy that satellite.

We just need your
lazy ray for one minute.

Ready, Gus?

All set here. Gretchen?

I never wished to
apply my knowledge

to the advancement of weaponry,

but, in this case, I'll
make an exception.

Lax, fire at will!

It's working!

Getting warmer, warmer.

What the... ooh! Wow!

Cool!

No!

It would seem that our plan

has proven extremely effective.

Thanks, Gretchen.

The whole universe
owes you big time.

You, too, little guy.

Thanks.

Cowabunga!

Well, well, well.

It's beautiful.

And it couldn't have happened

to a nastier guy
than hamsterviel.

I'll tell him you said that.

Let me guess, another alien?

Silence!

I'll just be taking the
experiment now, and...

Aah!

♪ Hide and seek ♪

Not it!

I'm glad lax's ray
finally wore off,

and you guys are back to normal.

Did you end up finding
a good home for lax?

Yeah, I think he's
gonna be real happy.

Hey, keep those stinking
things away from me!

Hey, would you people mind?

I'm on an important
business call here!

Yeah, j.B. I'm still here.

I can be reached all week.

No. No. No. I hate the beach.

There's no fax
machine out there.

Heh heh. Sacha!

Huh?

I... I... I'm on vacation.

Stitch and I are really
gonna miss you guys.

Hey, why don't you
come back with us?

Sorry, we've got a
kitchen to go clean up.

We're gonna make
a game out of it.

Um, guys, I hate to spoil

our little good-bye party,

but where the hang is finster?

Muriel, shouldn't you check
in on those kids of yours?

Quiet!

We don't mention those
miscreants on spa premises.

Sorry, Muriel.

Rolf, you got a set
of palms on you.

Ooh, baby.

No wonder they call
this place paradise.
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