07x10 & 07x11 - Terror Tales of the Park V Pt. 1

[bunniefuu]

[♪♪♪]

[♪♪♪]

[ALL CHEERING]

[PEOPLE CHATTERING

INDISTINCTLY]

[CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS]

Whoo-hoo!

Man, Benson, you really went

all out for this party.

That catapult--

Uh, uh!

That catapult!

Yeah, you normally get streamers

and just call it a day.

Ha! I haven't even shown

you guys the best part.

I present...

Racki the Wishmaker.

Thanks for sharing,

Benson.

I'm going back to the party.

Cool, I guess.

Wait! You guys gotta

at least try it.

You make a wish,

and it shows you

what would happen if it

came true, but really scary.

Meh.

I don't know.

Listen, I didn't put down

a -dollar security deposit

for nothing.

Just watch.

[CLEARS THROAT]

I wish...

I wish I could motivate

Mordecai and Rigby at work.

A hard worker

is all you desire,

so to their backside,

let us add some fire.

[LAUGHS EVILLY]

MAN [ON TV]:

Tired of trying to fit a head

of lettuce in your mouth?

Just try our new

salad guillotine.

Off with your head...

Of lettuce.

Salad guillotine.

Make a salad fit in your mouth.

BOTH:

So cool.

Hey, didn't I tell you

to mow the lawn?

Why are you

watching TV?

I don't know.

Just feeling "blah" today,

you know?

Yeah, kind of got a case of

the afternoon sleeps.

[GROANS]

I don't want to hear it.

Get back to work,

or you're fired!

[BOTH GROAN]

MAN:

Do you have trouble

motivating your employees?

Why, yes, I do.

I'm Puppet King

from Puppet Depot.

Buy my puppet,

Mr. Bossman.

Yells at your workers

so you don't have to.

Best part is, it's not you

doing it. It's the puppet.

Murray, can I

get a glass of water?

Puppet depo-- Wait.

Mr. Bossman.

Show the number.

[HIGH-PITCHED VOICE]

Call now, or you're fired!

Aw, man.

[SCOFFS]

[HIGH-PITCHED VOICE]

Hey!

Hey, get back to work!

Get back to work

right now!

Bens-- Oh.

What is the--

This is really uncomfortable.

Hey, it's not me

making you uncomfortable.

It's Mr. Bossman.

Get back to work!

Get back to work!

Eh...Okay. I guess...

we'll go.

Wow. They're so

motivated.

[BOTH IMITATING LASER FIRE]

[DISTORTED]

No!

Got you now--

Hey!

Hey, you two,

quit messing around!

Don't get germs

on the cups!

Do what I say, or

you'll be out on the street!

BOTH:

Sorry, Benson.

Not Benson--

Mr. Bossman.

[BOTH GROAN]

MR. BOSS:

Hey! Scrub faster!

Time is

money!

You got a real loose grip,

Mordecai.

Explains why you can't hold on

to a relationship.

Wait-- Wha?

Hey, you-- You-- You--

"You-- You-- You."

Less stuttering,

more scrubbering!

[BOTH GROAN]

[SIGHS DEEPLY]

I'm a good boss.

[♪♪♪]

[THUNDER CRASHING]

MR. BOSS:

Hey, keep sleeping.

Yeah. Yeah.

Roll over on your side.

Yeah.

When you wake up, you should

pack up your bags and leave.

Never-- Never come back!

Huh?

[GROANS]

[♪♪♪]

You don't deserve this job!

I'm the one

motivating the workers!

I gotta support my family!

[THUNDER CRASHES]

Aah!

[WARBLING]

[PANTING]

[PANTING]

What happened?

Benson, are you okay?

There was a doll and a--

The wish just felt

too real.

We should probably

stop using--

Oh, I'm next,

you slowpokes.

[LAUGHS]

Pops, wait!

I wish I could travel more.

Going on a trip

is no easy feat.

With a head like that,

you'll need an extra seat.

[LAUGHS EVILLY]

[SPECTATORS MURMURING]

Wow, what are the odds

of all of us

getting jury duty on Halloween?

[GAVEL BANGS]

Court is now in session.

Up next,

The State v. John Wolfhard.

[GROWLS]

BOTH:

Whoa, cool.

He's a werewolf.

Mr. Wolfhard, you stand accused

of m*rder. How do you plead?

My client pleads not guilty,

Your Honor.

Yeah!

I never ate nobody.

And if I did,

there'd be no evidence,

'cause I always eat

the bones.

[GAVEL BANGS]

Mr. Wolfhard,

where were you the night

of the last full moon?

If you must know,

I was bottle-feeding

an orphaned baby deer.

Interesting--

So you wouldn't recognize...

this patch of werewolf hair

we found at the crime scene,

would you?

Uh... That could belong

to any werewolf...with my DNA.

Then there's this entry from

your diary from that same night.

"Dear diary,

ate a guy today.

This is not a joke.

Till next time,

signed John."

RIGBY: He's guilty.

MORDECAI: Don't know about him.

We've heard enough.

Let's get this over with.

Ooh! Ooh!

Your Honor,

may I use the bathroom,

please?

Okay, sir, but make it quick.

Good show.

Uh... If he's allowed to go,

I am too, right?

Who am I to judge?

[CHUCKLES]

[DOOR OPENS]

Should he be in there

without supervision?

Eh, that frail old man

will keep an eye on him.

[WHISTLING]

[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]

[♪♪♪]

[WHIMPERS]

WOLFHARD: Ah, for-- Hey!

Yes?

Do me a solid.

I'm all out.

Oh. Um, of course.

WOLFHARD:

Thanks.

Now I just need one more favor.

Yes?

[ROARS]

[SCREAMS]

Hold still!

[CHOMPS]

[POPS SCREAMS]

Hey!

Don't make me come in there!

Sorry, old-timer.

It's you or me.

[WHIMPERS]

Where are you going?

I'm going someplace

where they treat werewolves

with respect--

London.

Wait!

[WHIMPERS]

Goodness!

[GRUNTING]

That's it!

[GRUNTS]

Freeze!

Oh, dear.

I can explain.

Come quietly, son.

I don't wanna have to blow

this dog whistle.

Let's just

talk this over.

[BLOWS]

Aah!

[GRUNTS]

[WHIMPERS]

So, when you inevitably

find Mr. Wolfhard guilty,

you can add destruction

of property, eating a juror,

and attempted escape

to his list of crimes.

Wolfhard?

Oh, no!

[POPS WHIMPERS]

Jury,

have we

reached a verdict yet?

Your Honor,

we find the defendant--

Objection! I mean, wait!

You're making

a terrible mistake!

I've been framed!

It's me-- Pops!

ALL: Pops?

Wait. Let me get this straight.

You're saying the real k*ller

att*cked you in the bathroom,

turned you into a werewolf,

tore a hole in the wall,

and then escaped, leaving

you to take the rap?

Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh.

That actually makes

a lot of sense.

But my gut's telling me

to have fun with this.

Let's stick with "guilty,"

see how it pans out.

Mr. Wolfhard, you are hereby

sentenced to life in prison.

This can't be!

Let's go, you animal.

No!

Stop him!

TOGETHER:

Yeah!

[PANTING]

[MOB SHOUTING]

Stop him!

[♪♪♪]

[SHOUTING CONTINUES]

[SHOUTING CONTINUES]

Eat it, Wolfhard!

Huh?

[SCREAMS]

[GRUNTS]

MAN [IN BRITISH ACCENT]:

Last call for Flight

to London.

One ticket to London,

please.

Sure. Go on up.

Good show.

[MOB SHOUTING]

Sorry. All full.

Oh. Hey, old-timer.

You made it.

Sorry about

mauling you earlier.

No hard feelings,

right? Hah, heh.

Water under the bridge,

my good sir.

Great.

Say, me and the boys are gonna

get tea at the royal palace

when we land in London,

maybe eat the Queen.

You in?

Oh, tea. Good show.

WOMAN [OVER SPEAKER]:

Flight to London, England,

is ready for takeoff.

Fellas, this one's for you.

♪ A-hoo

Werewolves of London ♪

♪ A-hoo ♪

♪ A-hoo

Werewolves of London ♪

♪ A-hoo

Something, something ♪

♪ Werewolves from London ♪

Okay. So, I'm confused.

Is Racki scary or just lame?

Oh, no, I'm not lame.

I'm definitely scary.

Boo! See?

[LAUGHING EVILLY]

Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo!

Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo!

Um, if it's okay, I guess

I'll give Racki the Wishmaker

one more sh*t to see

if he's actually scary.

Okay.

Uh, are you sure?

Someone else can go first.

Uh, I can wait.

No, you go.

Well, okay.

Just let me know

if I go too long.

Celia's in Prague doing a guest

lecture, and I really miss her,

so I wish, um-- Well, I guess

I wish I could visit her.

Does, uh,

that sound good?

You wish to hang out

with your lady?

Then you will-- Will, uh--

Ahem.

Well, I can't think of anything

that rhymes with "lady,"

so I'm just gonna go ahead

and start.

[LAUGHS EVILLY]

[♪♪♪]

Oh, this seems like

a nice place.

[WHISTLING]

Thirty-sixth floor?

That's quite the hike.

Maybe I'll treat myself

and use the elevator.

Uh, excuse me.

Sorry to bother you, but, uh,

is this elevator working?

I need to see my girlfriend

on the th floor.

Girlfriend, huh?

Well,

you're in luck.

I just got this baby fixed up.

[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]

Oh, what a relief.

Thank you, sir.

You two love birds

have fun now.

Yeah, we're probably gonna get

some Chinese foo--

Ahh. I can't wait to see Celia.

[ELEVATOR BANGS]

Huh?

What the-- What's happening?

Oh, I sure hope

I'm not stuck.

[SIGHS]

All right, Fives, keep calm.

Survey the area.

When you are lost

in times of strife,

to look around

may save your life.

Eureka! An intercom button.

Maybe I can call for help.

MAN [OVER INTERCOM]:

Yeah? What's the problem?

Is this the repair guy?

I'm stuck in the elevator.

We talked earlier.

I had the flowers.

Oh, of course. We'll have it

running in no time.

How about some music

while you wait?

That sounds great.

Thank you.

[OMINOUS MUSIC PLAYING]

Uh, do you have anything

a little less ominous?

Oh, sure.

[ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING]

You know-- You know what?

I changed my mind.

Could you turn off the music,

please?

Uh, hello?

Oh, no.

I don't wanna be trapped

in here. Not like this!

I never paid off

my student loans!

I don't want

to burden my family!

Aah!

[MUSIC STOPS]

Oh, sorry, buddy.

I-I couldn't hear you

over the smooth jazz.

Hey, looks like

I got the elevator working.

[RUMBLING]

Oh, no! Oh, no!

Aah!

Aah!

[GRUNTS]

[SCREAMING, GRUNTING]

Celia's flowers!

No!

[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]

MAN:

Sorry about that, kid.

Pressed the wrong button.

You have a good night.

Thank you, sir.

Fives!

[GASPS]

Celia!

I got you some flower stems.

They used to be flowers.

Thanks.

But who were you talking to?

Oh, I was just talking

to the elevator repairman.

He's nice.

I should get his e-mail.

Fives,

the elevator's broken.

The repairman d*ed

years ago.

What?

Yeah, I've been taking

the stairs.

Thirty-six floors

is quite the hike.

Yeah. That's why I used

the eleva...tor.

[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]

Wait.

[BOTH GASP]

[GROANING]

[SCREAMS]

Aah! Aah! Celia!

Celia!

Snap out of it, bro.

Oh, man, it was so real.

It was so real.

All right,

I think we've all had enough

of Racki the Wishmaker

for one evening.

No way, man.

I'm still doing mine.

I've wanted this one

my whole life.

Dear Racki,

I wish I was popular as a kid.

This seems to me

a wish that all should see.

[ALL CHATTER]

ALL:

Huh?

[♪♪♪]

RACKI:

Your wish is

to be Mr. Popular.

Well, let's see how you like

being Mr. Popular.

Hey, you can't rhyme "popular"

With popul-- Aah!

[ALL GASPING]

[♪♪♪]

Hey, it's RGB .

Awesome!

Dude, your costume's, like,

the best one out tonight.

Thanks.

It feels good to be at the top.

Mm-hmm.

Looking good, Kim.

Why, thank you,

Mario.

Hmm! Ahh. That was cool.

Thanks, Racki.

Um, if you could just wait

till the end.

Nah, I'm goo-- Aah!

Hey, look!

[ALL LAUGH]

Oh, no way!

[GASPS]

Oh, no, dude.

You didn't paint the back?

It looked done

in the mirror.

Guess

the Sweatpants Bandit

got a tummy ache

from too much candy.

[GASPS]

That's you!

You're

the Sweatpants Bandit.

But I'm Super Mordecai.

It's not his fault his mom

made him wear layers!

It's gonna get

really chilly out tonight.

[CHUCKLES]

Don't you mean windy?

Pbht!

[ALL LAUGH]

Man. We can't even be cool

on Halloween.

Hey, you wanna be cool?

Go take a piece of candy

from that house over there.

[THUNDER CRASHES]

[GULPS]

I'm okay with us

not doing this, Rigby.

I like who I am,

and I don't need to prove--

Don't embarrass me.

Fine,

we'll take some candy.

Move your feet, Mordecai.

They're watching.

[GROANS]

I can't do it.

Something might pop out.

[SIGHS]

Come on,

what's gonna pop out?

There's not even a scarecrow

up there.

It's just a bowl.

Of candy.

Yeah.

[WIND WHISTLING]

You go first.

[GROANS]

Fine.

I'll go first.

[INHALES DEEPLY]

[♪♪♪]

[WHIMPERING]

[WHIMPERS]

[WHIMPERS]

[SCREAMS]

[SCREAMS]

[LAUGHS]

Gotcha!

Oh, don't do that.

Okay, we did it.

See?

These kids are cooler

than I thought.

Yeah, that's right.

We're so cool,

we're taking the whole bowl.

[DOOR CREAKS]

Should've brought

another pumpkin.

Huh?

Huh?

[BOTH LAUGHING]

[BOYS SCREAMING]

BOTH:

Huh?

[BOTH SCREAMING]

[BOTH WHIMPERING]

So...

you thought you could take

more than one piece

of candy, eh?

No! I mean, yes!

Usually there's

a "Take One" sign, so--

Well, then, have some more.

[BOTH SCREAM]

BOTH:

Huh?

Whoa!

It's all chocolate.

Really?

We can eat this?

Like a zombie eats his brother.

Okay. Interesting way

to say yes.

[CHOMPS]

Mmm.

We thought for sure

you were

a scary witch

who was gonna chop us up.

[GULPS]

I'm glad you're

just a harmless, old hag.

Let my face be a lesson

to always wear sunscreen.

Oh, I know. My mom's super good

about reapplying too.

[CHOMPING]

Hey, this is really good.

[GULPS] Yeah.

I mean, going back

to the zombie thing earlier,

it's weird how it's shaped

like body parts,

but it tastes much better

than what I'm used to.

[CHOMPS]

That's because it's homemade.

Whoa! So cool.

I guess you get into

a lot of hobbies

when you're so ugly

that everyone's scared

to talk...to...

Um...

[GASPS]

Mordecai!

I can't feel my--

I can't feel my...chocolate.

[LAUGHS EVILLY]

I know what you're thinking.

"Oh, sugar!

I 'nougat' something like this

might happen."

No! That's not

what I was thinking.

Aah!

[MORDECAI SCREAMING]

No! Mordecai!

[GRUNTS, GASPS]

Super Mordecai!

WITCH:

Now with nuts.

Parting is such sweet sorrow,

isn't it?

No! It isn't!

[GRUNTS]

[PANTING]

Hey,

look at me!

I hope you saved room

for dessert!

Stop talking!

[PANTING]

[WHIMPERS]

[GRUNTING]

KIDS: Ooh!

Chocolate.

What's that?

What's this?

Hey,

Rigby's chocolate.

Yeah. He's so rich

and smooth.

Mmm.

He's straight-up delicious.

Mmm.

Oh, yeah.

Whoa.

Did that kid

really turn into chocolate?

That's the coolest thing

I've ever seen.

[ALL CHOMPING]

Rigby's the best.

I want

another piece of him.

[ALL GROANING]

Well, that's not exactly

what I hoped for.

I think we can all agree

that Racki the Wishmaker

is terrifying.

Wait, what the...?

Where's Racki?

Hey! That's my wallet!

And our TV!

[TIRES SCREECH]

[IN JAMAICAN ACCENT]

Come on! Get in the truck, mon!

Stop! Don't do it!

Not with all our stuff!

[LAUGHS]

And the next time

you'll see them

is at the pawn shop for

a hefty markup.

So long, suckers!

[RACKI LAUGHS]

Oh, no!

Step on it, Rhombus!

[TIRES SQUEAL]

Looks like someone's wishes

for riches

has hit a few hitches.

Dude,

that sounds just like

something Racki

would say.

[ALL LAUGH]

[LAUGHS EVILLY]

Wait, why are you laughing?

Because now you'll never

get your security deposit back.

[LAUGHS EVILLY]

No!

[PANTING]

How'd your wish for throwing the

best ever Halloween party go?

Terrible.

I'm not renting this thing

if I can't get my deposit back.

I'm taking my business

to the trusty streamer store,

thank you very much.

Come on, Racki!

We'll never be able

to rent you out

if you keep scaring off

the customers.

If rentals aren't arriving

as desired,

then perhaps your boss

should have you fire--

[ELECTRICITY HUMS]

Dumb rapping robot.

[♪♪♪]