06x24 - Men in Uniform

[bunniefuu]

[♪♪♪]

You stole my name, Pops.

And it won't be over

until I get my revenge!

[LAUGHS MANIACALLY]

Hey, Benson,

what's with the fancy spread?

Mr. Maellard said he needed

to give an announcement.

You could all learn a thing

or two about boss appreciation--

[TABLE CRASHES]

[SIGHS]

Mr. Maellard!

How nice of you

to visit us today.

No time for bootlicking, Benson.

Take a seat.

As you're all aware,

park attendance

has been declining for years.

With no visitors, I'm basically

just paying you boys

to babysit Pops at this point.

They're doing

a bang-up job!

With that in mind, I've decided

to shut down the park.

Come on, man!

What?

No visitors?

Well, what about, uh...

That guy?

Wait. Not yet.

One ugly guy

plotting revenge on my son

for the last four years isn't

enough to keep the park open.

You guys all had a good run,

but I'm afraid you're all fired.

Now if you'll excuse me,

I got to go rig a yacht race.

Wait!

[LIMO DOOR CLOSES]

Mr. Maellard! Mr. Maellard!

Benson,

get ahold of yourself!

Please, just give us

one more sh*t.

It's all I've got...

[GROANS]

Aw, jeez.

Look, it'll take a week

for the paperwork to go through,

but if you can get attendance

up, I might reconsider.

But I'm talking about

real park visitors,

not a bunch of weirdos

hiding out in the bushes.

Thank you, Mr. Maellard.

Thank you so much!

One week, Benson.

[TIRES SCREECH]

Thank you, Mr. Maellard!

Not yet. Ooh!

Maellard sent us this turnstile

to keep tabs on our attendance.

Now, ideas for bringing in

more visitors.

Anyone?

Battle boats...

Have something to share?

I was thinking the paddle boats

are kind of lame,

so maybe we could--

Whoa! Let me stop you there,

'cause I see where you're

going, and I like it!

BOTH:

Battle boats!

Like bumper cars

but on the high seas!

Slap tires on the sides,

give people lances for jousting.

I don't think

that's a good idea.

Hold on, Skips.

Now, obviously,

battle boats is a terrible idea.

We all agree on that.

But we've got just one week

to save the park.

So no idea,

besides battle boats,

is too stupid.

Now, come on.

Let's get some visitors

to the park!

[♪♪♪]

BENSON:

Well, this was a disaster.

Low turnout

is one thing,

but how did we get

negative visitors?

Guys, in hours, Maellard's

gonna shut the park down!

No more ideas at all?

We could update our résumés.

Good idea.

Oy.

This is it.

I'll miss you all.

[BLOWS]

Oh, come on, guys...

[SNIFFLES]

Let's have some fun

on our last night, huh?

Wing kingdom? My treat?

[ALL CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY]

[♪♪♪]

RIGBY:

You don't get it, man.

Oh, yeah!

I remember that.

[BURPS]

Shh! Shh!

Hey! Hey!

I want to say somethin'.

Here's to the best crew

I've ever worked with!

[ALL CHEERING]

Yeah, Benson!

And you know what?

I'm just gonna say it--

Maellard is a jerk!

Yeah!

He's my father,

though.

And people are jerks too.

Why wouldn't you want to come

to our park?

I mean, look how pretty it is

tonight.

You know what my favorite part

of the park is?

That tree right there.

Wait. That's not--

Or...

Where was it again?

Come to think of it,

where are we?

Yeah.

I've worked here for years.

I've never seen this part

of the park before.

That's because

this isn't your park.

Yeah!

Remember stuff somewhere else.

You're holding up the line

for the gazebo.

How'd we end up

in East Pines?

How many wings have we had?

Quick, guys--

Let's trash the place!

Hup! Hup!

[GRUNTING]

That's actually pretty solid.

Get them out of here!

Hey! Stop!

Cut it out!

[GRUNTING]

[BREATHING HEAVILY]

Nice threads.

What's the secret?

Why does East Pines

get visitors when we don't?

It's the uniforms,

isn't it, Gene?

[SIGHS]

Yeah, Benson.

It's the uniforms.

[ALL LAUGHING]

Ha! So you admit it!

What're you talking about?

It's too late.

We know your secret.

Let's get out of here.

[LAUGHTER]

Hey. Hey!

Quiet!

We only have more hours

to save the park.

Now...

Who's ready to stay up

all night designing uniforms?

ALL:

Uniforms! Whoo!

[♪♪♪]

[INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE]

[NARRATOR READS ON-SCREEN TEXT]

[NARRATOR READS ON-SCREEN TEXT]

[NARRATOR READS ON-SCREEN TEXT]

[NARRATOR READS ON-SCREEN TEXT]

Synergy, solution,

bottom line, X Factor.

[NARRATOR READS ON-SCREEN TEXT]

Well, guys, this is it--

Our last day.

So I don't know--

Rake some leaves or something.

[BREATHING HEAVILY]

Oh, great!

Guys, the uniforms!

ALL:

Uniforms!

Ha! Maybe it won't be

our last day after all.

Weird they put them all

in separate boxes.

Looks like there's

some kind of warning.

[♪♪♪]

Blah, blah, blah.

Do you want to read

or do you want to save the park?

[♪♪♪]

Oh, my. These didn't

turn out well at all.

I don't understand.

They looked

so cool

on the computer last night.

Smile, bro!

My friend Scottie

is gonna love this.

[GAME BEEPING]

[VIBRATING]

Heh.

Classic. Mm-hmm.

Check it out!

Your picture's going viral.

Stop talking!

Whoa, Benson-- Look!

We've got visitors.

[CAMERA SHUTTERS CLICKING]

Huh! Looks like the uniforms

are already working.

Hey, there's more.

[♪♪♪]

[HORN HONKING]

[PEOPLE CLAMORING]

RIGBY:

Whoa! This is crazy!

Dude, whatever

they're paying you

to wear those ugly uniforms,

it's not enough!

Ha! They're even more heinous

than that internet picture.

Aw, what? Muscle Man!

These people are here

to make fun of our uniforms

because of your picture!

Whatever.

Any publicity is good publicity.

Hey, I want a picture

with double-wide!

Get off me, bro!

[LAUGHTER]

All right,

let's all settle down.

We're glad you're visiting

the park--

Oh! Who threw that?

[LAUGHTER]

Aah! No more pictures!

Now seems like

a good time to leave.

Agreed!

They're getting away!

Hey! I'm not done

making fun of them!

MAN:

Get 'em!

[CROWD CLAMORING]

Hey, guys! The houndstooth

codpiece was a great idea,

but it's making it hard to run

from this angry mob.

Ditch the uniforms?

Bingo.

Okay, fine!

But it's a colossal

waste of money!

[♪♪♪]

There they are!

[ALL GRUNTING]

Uh, guys...

What's going on?

Those clashing colors

and styles are highly unstable!

Run!

[♪♪♪]

[ALL SCREAMING]

It's a black hole

of ugliness!

It only sucks in ugly things.

Aah!

[YOWLS]

Aah!

Yeah, but we're safe.

We're not ugly.

Oh, yeah, bros!

We got nothing to worry about!

We have to find a way

to plug that hole!

Agreed. In the meantime,

Muscle Man,

try to be more...attractive?

[GRUNTS]

[SQUEALS]

[LAUGHS MANIACALLY]

[POSSUMS HISSING]

[ALL SCREAM]

[LAUGHTER CONTINUES]

Fill it in!

[ALL GRUNTING]

Look at these dweebs.

I'm a male model,

and even I know

you can't fill up

a magical portal.

Yeah, losers.

[ALL SCREAMING]

Guess they were ugly

on the inside.

Bros! Bros!

I think I might be

the right size and shape

to plug up that hole!

I'm too, you know,

"appearance challenged"

for this world anyway, right?

ALL:

Uh...

[ALL GASP]

Stop trying to protect

my feelings, bros!

It's science!

I'm gonna let go!

ALL:

No! No, no, no!

No!

[CHUCKLES MANIACALLY]

Gotcha!

I've waited

a long time for this.

Huh?

Time to see

what's on the other side.

[SQUEALING]

[ALL YELL]

What is this?

Who are you?

You took my life away from me!

Now I'm gonna return the favor.

[LAUGHING]

[MUSCLE MAN SQUEALING]

Huh?

Aah!

MAELLARD [CHUCKLES]:

Well, I don't know

how you did it.

We have never had

more visitors.

Oh, papa!

Does that mean...?

That we'll be open

for years to come!

Yes!

This park is wonderful!

[SIPS]

Oh, this tea is wonderful too.

Thanks for noticing the tea,

sir.

How did you all think of it?

Well,

we just asked ourselves:

"What do we have

that other parks don't?"

[CHUCKLES]

Finally,

the attention I deserve!

[SOBBING]

I'm so happy!

[CHUCKLES]

[♪♪♪]