08x10 - Spacey McSpaceTree

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Regular Show". Aired: September 6, 2010 – January 16, 2017.*
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Series revolves around the daily lives of two 23-year-old friends – Mordecai (a blue jay) and Rigby (a raccoon) – who work as groundskeepers at a park, and spend their days trying to avoid work and entertain themselves by any means.
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08x10 - Spacey McSpaceTree

Post by bunniefuu »

Ohhhhhhhh! Time to kick this up a notch.

Dude, you can't sh**t at maximum power.

Your little body can't handle it.

You don't know what my body is capable of.

Eh, those new curtains really tie the room together, eh?

Yeah, eh?

More maple syrup for your pancakes, eh?

Oh, I'm sorry! So sorry! Oh, gee! The Canadians?

! Of all people! They're the most pleasant group on the entire Space Tree.

I said I was sorry.

You're a loose cannon, Rigby, and I won't tolerate your unsafe behavior anymore! Unsafe?

! I'm totally Who

-oa, who

-o

-o

-oa! safe?

I'm putting you on probation.

That means no more target practice, no off

-site privileges, and, of course, no food trucks.

But tomorrow is Roxie's Famous Fry Truck! Her butt salt is delicious! Guess it's no butt salt for you.

Can't you let me slide just this once?

Hmm.

If you pass the Space Tree safety test, I'll let you off the hook.

But I suggest you start studying now.

This thing's drier than a bowl of pretzels on Dust Planet 9.

Come on, Rawls.

I just graduated high school.

I'm not gonna read that thing.

Well, there is another way for those less, uh, literate.

Name it.

Perkins, awaken Spacey McSpacetree.

Hey, everybody! Hello, Spacey.

Been a while.

Who is this guy?

Rigby, this is Spacey McSpacetree, our beloved mascot.

He's been in cryo

-sleep for the last 30 years.

That costume sure looks like it's from 30 years ago.

Co

-o

-stume?

Hey! Show him some respect! He's gonna stick with you until you pass the test.

That's right.

You can't be Safey McSafety without Spacey McSpacetree.

It's certainly nice to wake up to a new friend.

Put 'er there, Rigby.

Whoa! Careful, now.

That's a very unsafe handshake you got there.

We're gonna have to work on that.

So, in conclusion, the seat belt always go over the waist.

Do you need another demonstration?

Ugh! I got it! You already showed me, like, five times.

Pump the brakes there, amigo! That's a safety violation waiting to happen.

I was just putting it down.

I wasn't gonna spill it.

Okay, picture this.

Say you're walking around, minding your own business, Then bam! You knock into the table.

Aw, come on! Then, next thing you know Whoop! you end up hurting yourself.

Or worse.

Whoa! You end up in the hospital.

Ugh! You did that on purpose.

That would never happen in real life.

Hey, what's the commotion in here?

Whoa! Aaah! Oh, Benson! W

-W

-W

-Whoa! Bad show! See?

Come on, bro! Dig deep! Huh?

What?

Zero G! Aw.

I want to pretend like I can lift heavy stuff.

Stupid probation.

They're not even wearing helmets in there! Uno momento, Rig

-bud.

Hey, guys.

Having a good time?

Whoops! Still look fun to you?

! Dude, what's wrong with your new friend?

He's not my friend! He's just teaching me about safety so I can get off probation.

Why didn't you just read the safety manual?

Yeah, bro.

It's a pretty informative read.

Well, I wish I knew that before I got stuck with this crazy tree guy following me around and judging my every move! Rigby! That's a safety violation! Don't you know that 7 out of 10 lunchtime injuries are directly related to tray

-slamming?

This could've been you! Whoa, eh! Oh, sorry.

I'm sorry.

Sorry.

Spacey! What's your problem?

! Hey, I'm just watching your back, buddy.

I still got to teach you about safety with music.

Safe Safey McSafety.

Dude, turn! Turn! Aah! Got to be safe! If I'm not safe, he'll show up.

Dude, are you all right?

You look horrible.

It's Spacey! I got to get him off my back once and for all! Yeah, you got to pass that test.

I can't take much more of that guy.

Don't worry.

I have a plan.

Take the wheel! Hey! Where are you going?

! Aren't you on proba So, Spacey says you're ready for this?

Look I even have written permission.

Hmm.

Looks like did a number on his penmanship.

But if Spacey says you're ready, you're ready.

This is our testing overlook machine, or, as we like to call it, It's proficient in all forms of safety protocol.

Hello, T.

O.

M.

This is Rigby.

Hello, Rigby.

I look forward to grading your test.

Whoa.

This is a test?

Does it come with a crazy pencil or something?

No, there's no pencil.

Just call out your answer, and it will fill in automatically.

Once it's complete, insert it into T.

O.

M.

Good luck.

Ugh! How long does he want me to do this?

Huh?

Rigby, old buddy, old pal.

Couldn't help but notice you were driving a little erratically back there.

That's not very safe?

! Uhhhhh Whoa! Where is he?

! Where's Rigby?

! Dude, I don't know! I don't know! Rigby! Okay, question 17 "B.

" All right.

Question 18.

I'm coming, buddy! Whoa! Look both ways! You're not being safe! I'm sorry! Hmm.

Hmm.

Hmm.

Man, this is easier than I thought.

Goodbye, Spacey, and goodbye, probation.

Rigby! You're not ready! Uh

-oh.

A, B, D, Let go! No! You still have so much to learn! No! I'm through with you! No! Yes! Error.

Test malfunction.

Now look what you've done! Me?

! It was you! You're ruining my life! Ruining your life?

I thought we were bros.

You're the first friend I've had in 30 years.

Don't make like a tree and leave me.

Spacey! Aah! What do I do?

! What do I do?

! Quick! Stop, drop, and roll! I got to finish the test! Come on! We can still fix this! W

-What?

! Us against that?

! That's totally unsafe! Hey, sometimes you got to be unsafe to be safe.

Quick! Grab the test and read me the questions! Which ones did you leave blank?

Uh Okay, question 27.

"What do you do during a space

-quake?

" I know this.

Oh! Take cover underneath a table! Aah! Nice one! Okay, question 44.

"Where are you permitted to use Space Tree laser g*ns?

" Only in designated sh**ting areas.

Or if we're under att*ck, of course.

Whaaa! Okay, last question.

"What should you never do with space soda?

" What are my options?

! "A" drink while operating heavy machinery.

"B" put it on the edge of a table.

"C" drink more than two bottles a day.

Come on, Rigby! We went over this! Whoa! All of the above.

Safety test complete.

Processing results.

Congratulations.

You pass.

Hey, thanks, guys.

Yeah, it worked out.

Thanks for helping me, Spacey.

No problem.

Sorry for being so clingy.

If I've learned anything, it's that being too attached is emotionally unsafe.

Here.

You keep that safe for me.

You got it, friend.

Care for more of Roxie's food

-truck fries, Rigby?

Or, should I say, Safey McSafety.

Safety violation! Come on, bro.

I'm not gonna spill it.

Oops.

Tea time.

I'm going back to cryo

-sleep.
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