08x22 - The Key to the Universe

[bunniefuu]

Like I've been saying, Pops is the chosen one.

He must begin his training immediately, or Anti

-Pops will destroy him and the universe as we know it.

Why should we believe any of this nonsense?

How do we even know you're telling the truth?

Yeah, are you sure our Pops is the chosen one?

Maybe you, uh maybe you got the wrong guy.

I mean, look at him.

Ooh! Huh?

Oh, hello.

Pops is much stronger than he looks.

You cannot begin to comprehend the power he has within him.

What kind of fighting style are you gonna teach Pops?

I think you should teach him Krav Maga.

Or Death Kwon Do.

Pops has no need for such insignificant Maybe he could use the Fist of Justice.

He Is Pops gonna get cool powers and stuff?

I think Oh! Is he gonna sh**t fire out of his fingers?

That's not a thing! What kind of award does Pops get if he wins?

Yeah! We got to go on a world tour with Pops! Is he gonna have to go somewhere?

Enough! We need to take this seriously! Pops and Anti

-Pops are the reason for the universe as we know it.

Everything that exists is but a battleground for their celestial forms.

Every 14 billion years, they battle for dominance, but they are two sides of the same coin, their powers in perfect balance.

Every time, the battle ends in stalemate, and the universe resets anew.

But this time, it can be different.

With my help, Pops can break the cycle and save this universe.

Whoa! Titan?

Universe?

I'm just Pops.

This doesn't seem right.

I don't know, Pops.

This sounds really serious.

I think you have to do this.

But I don't want to fight anyone.

You can and will! Wait a minute.

How do we know this isn't all a load?

Yeah, we want proof.

Oh, you want proof?

Every time the cycle starts over, I get a tattoo on my Uh What's happening right now?

body! Frankly, I'm running out of space.

I will unlock your power, Pops.

Training starts now! Let us begin.

Socks?

Yes.

My socks, Pops.

We must fold them.

Okay.

Chase the rabbit 'round the tail, then insert his fluffy No! Aah! Do as I do.

Now you try.

Fold, tuck, then place in hamper.

Again.

Again! What the heck?

This is lame.

Yeah, where's the cool training we were promised?

Hmm.

Hm

-Hm

-Hm

-Hm

-Hm! Now it is time to make lemonade.

That sounds delightful! No! Not delightful! Grab a lemon.

Now squeeze it.

Clear your mind.

The lemon is your foe.

He does not want to yield his precious golden fluids, so you must crush him! Good.

Yes.

Now do that a million times! Ahh.

Pops, look at these bushes.

So unkempt.

Now, simply do as I do.

You see?

Easy.

But I don't want to hit a tree.

Just do it! Okay, okay.

This feels like a good place to take a 10

-minute break.

But before we resume, I want you to ponder this ancient haiku.

Darkness ahead strong.

My body frail like dried leaves.

Wise master so cool.

Okay.

This guy is full of it.

Yeah! I think Earl's a big, fat fraud! Oh, you got something to say?

Yeah.

When are you gonna teach him something useful?

I am.

Whatever, dude.

While you're folding socks, Anti

-Pops is probably off somewhere learning how to sh**t fire out of his fingers.

You're really hung up on that fire out of the fingers thing.

Because it's cool! Remind me again how many intergalactic champions have you trained, huh?

Is it zero?

It's zero.

Right?

Right?

Knock it off, dude! I bet you couldn't even knock this lemonade out of my hand.

Huh?

Huh?

Huh?

Hoo

-aah! Aah Huh?

I could stand here all day.

You make a nice foot stool.

Aah! Ooh! Okay! You're legit! I don't want to let you down.

But I'll never be as strong as Anti

-Pops.

Stop talking to that sad picture! Break's over! Wax apply, wax remove.

Wax apply, wax remove.

Now let's try it with water in the buckets.

Aah! Ooh! Mmm.

Time to freshen my cup.

Keep folding my undershirts.

It is a very important part of your training.

Psst! Pops! Huh?

How's training going?

Terrible.

Earl hasn't taught me anything.

Haven't taught you anything?

! Busted.

Uh I'm sorry, but it's the truth! Your training makes no sense! I think you're simply too lazy to do your own chores, and I'm fed up with being your personal chambermaid! Also, I think you are thoroughly unpleasant.

Oh, snap.

Dang! Ooh, burn! Oh, man.

Oh, no, he didn't.

I don't want any part of this.

You can fight Anti

-Pops for all I care.

Even if I wanted to, I cannot.

You are the chosen one.

I don't want to be the chosen one.

If you do not become stronger than Anti

-Pops, he will erase everything you hold near and dear from existence.

I refuse to train! Pops, I understand your frustration.

It is good that your will is strong.

I was going to wait to show you this in fear that it would be too overwhelming.

But this is my last resort to convince you.

What is that?

A fragment from a previous universe.

It will show the consequences of your decisions.

Where am I?

Oh, my! It's It's me! Yeah! Go! Go, Titan Pops! Remember our training! Anti

-Pops?

Stop! Stop fighting! Bad show.

Aah! No! Oh, dang it.

This part always hurts.

Aah!! Huh?

Fellows! The universe, it's vanishing! No!! Aah!! Bad show! Bad show! Pops, dude, what is it?

Are you okay?

What happened?

Are you okay?

I just want things to go back to how they were! Pops, wait! What did you show him?

Only the truth.

Not cool, Earl.

Sometimes the truth is not cool.

Ugh.

Whatever.

Let's go get Pops.

Get to my safe place.

Get to my safe place.

Get to my safe place.

Get to my safe place.

Yoo

-hoo! Hey, don't run away.

Hey, what's that?

Dude, over there! Hey, Pops.

You okay?

What is this place?

I brought my things here when my room was turned into the control room.

I've been coming here to get away from all this destiny nonsense.

Everything's changing, and it's up to me to stop it, but what if I can't?

What if I can't do it?

It's okay to be scared, Pops.

We're all scared.

Yeah, I'm, like, super scared.

I'm not gonna pretend that we can relate, but we know you can do this, and we'll be with you every step of the way.

That goes for all of us.

Yeah, we got your back, Pops.

Yes, Pops.

We are all here to help you.

You needn't be afraid.

Hey, Pops.

Yes?

Catch! Aah! Cool.

What the?

Very good.

Now your real training can begin.

That's way cooler than Krav Maga.