04x18 - Alabamy Bound: Part 2

[bunniefuu]

Last week on "gimme a break"... Oh, good, you finally got a smile on your face.


Now, here's what I want you to do.


I want you to go over, ring the doorbell,


And when your mama comes to the door,


You greet her with open arms, okay?


Okay.


Are you gonna stay out here all day,


Or are you coming in?


Loretta waited for the right man.


You panicked and married the first bum that came along.


Mama?


Hmm?


He wasn't a bum.


[ Laughs ]


And he wasn't the first.


Mama's going to live with you in glenlawn.


♪ Gimme a break, now I know what it takes ♪


♪ I'm putting a new face on the old one ♪


♪ Ready for anything


♪ Playing with fate, not a moment too late ♪


♪ I'm showing the whole world nothing can get me down ♪


♪ O-o-o-oh


♪ Gimme a break


♪ Yeah, yeah ♪ gimme a break


♪ 'Cause I sure need one ♪ gimme a break


♪ Yeah, yeah ♪ I finally know where I belong ♪


♪ Gimme a break


♪ Yeah, yeah ♪ gimme a break


♪ 'Cause I sure need one ♪ gimme a break


♪ Yeah, yeah ♪ I finally know where I belong ♪


♪ Gimme a break!


And so, loretta and howard, you have decided to share your lives and live as one,"],…}


But you must be aware of the pitfalls.


I'm gonna have to tell loretta it's not as simple


As just buying mama a one-way ticket to glenlawn.


It's the chief's house. He's the boss.


He runs that house. I just live there.


I don't know why she wants me to do her a favor, anyway.


She never liked me, and I don't like her.


I don't even know if she's really my sister.


She sure don't look like my dad,


And I sure don't look like my mama.


I'm gonna tell you something, honey --


Amen!


Amen! Amen! Amen! Amen!


I just know that as soon as I get there,


The chief is not gonna --


Addy, are you listening to me?


No, I'm trying to listen to the minister.


Why? He ain't saying nothing you ain't never heard before.


Neither are you.


And now, if there be anyone who objects to the joining


Of this couple in holy matrimony,


Speak now or forever hold your peace.


[ Telephone rings ] I'll get that!


You are doing a wonderful job.


Hello?


Hi, nell. It's me -- carl.


Oh, chief, thank goodness you called.


Listen, something terrible's happened.


What's the matter?


Well, you know my sister, loretta,


And her new husband, howard, are moving to denver.


Now, get this -- they want my mama


To come live with us in glenlawn.


Now, wait a minute.


Before you go through the roof,


I want you to know that it's all right


For you to go right ahead and say no.


I'll understand.


Wait a minute, nell. This is kind of sudden.


Hold on one minute.


Minister I pronounce you man and wife.


Aww.


Chief, listen, the reception's about to start,


So would you hurry up and say "no," please?


Well, nell, you were the one


Who got my father to move in with us.


The least I could do, I suppose,


Is open my door to your mother.


What?


We'll fix up the room over the garage.


Chief, I'm gonna have to level with you.


Do you know what it would be like


To have a loudmouthed, pushy, know-it-all black lady


Move in your house and take over?!


Yeah.


[ Pills rattle ]


Who was that on the phone, nell?


It was a wrong number, mama.


She'll never let us go out and play.


Well, let me give it a sh*t.


Can we go outside and play?


No.


Why not? Because I said so.


See? What did I tell you?


But the wedding's over.


Nell, you tell him. Maybe he'll listen to you.


Joey, go outside and play.


Yes! Come on, we can go outside and play!



Yay!


That was awesome! Jerome, could you teach me?


Oh, nell.


Loretta...


All the best, honey.


Oh, nell, I'm so glad you're not still upset


About mama coming to live with you in glenlawn.


Nah. I've lived a rich, full life.


♪ Here comes the groom


[ Laughs ]


Oh, congratulations, weatherman.


Thanks, sis.


Well, it was chilly today,


But it'll be hot "tamale." [Tomorrow]


Not now, howard.


Oh, nell, I'd like you to meet mary lou fong.


She does the evening news with me.


She's chinese.


Oh, mary lou.


[ Southern accent ] oh, well, hi, howard!


I do declare -- this has been


The finest little ol' wedding I've ever been to.


Mary lou, I'd like you to meet loretta's sister.


Nell, this is mary lou fong, our anchorperson.


Well, hi, nell. How y'all doin'?


[ Southern accent ] we all are just doing fine.


Ah, loretta, we're sure gonna miss y'all.


I mean, it's just not gonna be the same news


Without ol' howard here doing the weather.


Well, I suppose y'all are taking maybelle, too, huh?


Well, no, maybelle's not coming with us to denver.


She's moving out to california.


Oh, yes. [ Chuckles ]


Loretta's been so kind


As to let mama live with me the rest of my born days.


[ Laughs ]


Addy!


[ Chuckles ] oh, that's precious.


Why, you two are such lovely daughters.


Why, I wouldn't let my little ol' mama live with me


For all the tea in china.


[ Normal voice ] you wouldn't?


Not for all the tea in china.


Yo, addy, in the kitchen.


Here, honey. It was nice meeting y'all, you hear?


[ Laughs ]


Nell, you are ruining this wedding for me!


Now, can't you tell me all this on the plane?


No, because you won't be able to hear me.


We'll be sitting four across,


With my mama's mouth going from coast to coast.


You mean the chief said maybelle can live with you?


Addy, my mama is coming to glenlawn.


Oh, nell, you've got to be kidding!


There is no way you and your mother


Can live under the same roof.


I know that!


But loretta's been stuck with her all these years,


And now...it's my turn.


Aunt nell, will I be glad to get home.


Your mother won't even let me


Eat a piece of wedding cake in the house.


Why not? I don't know.


All she ever says is, "because I said so."


Listen, joey, I want you to go back in there,


Get you a piece of wedding cake, take it upstairs,


Go in the bathroom, hold it over the bathroom sink,


And don't drop one crumb or leave any evidence,


And you keep having a good time.


Thanks, aunt nell! Wish me luck!


Why couldn't I have been born chinese?


I tell you, I just have to accept mama the way she is,


Because at her age, she's not gonna change.


When she gets to glenlawn,


I'll just have to bite the b*llet.


And if that doesn't work,


I'll put the b*llet back in the g*n and I'll sh**t myself.


Nell, look, just because


Loretta and howard have given you that ticket


Does not mean you have to accept the situation.


What else am I going to do?


Maybe you could find her a roommate!


Oh, addy, thank you! You take her!


You've always gotten along great. What?


I'm sorry. I'm sorry.


What kind of daughter am i?


No matter what kind of problems we have,


She's still my mother.


[ Crying ] and if I close the door in her face,


I'll have to live with that guilt the rest of my life.


Oh, of course you would.


And you're much to sensitive to live with that kind of guilt.


You're wrong, addy. I could live with it.


Did you see the way she treated joey?


She would treat the whole family the same way.


She would drive them right up the wall.


It would be a clean wall,


But she would drive them up there, anyway!


No, I'm gonna tell my mama she cannot come to glenlawn!


And then I'll just have to find a way



To live with that guilt!


Okay, everybody, now, who's gonna catch the bouquet?


Mama?


What?


You...


You better go get packed. Our plane leaves at .


Addy?


Nell! You caught the bouquet!


Della bye.


Bye-bye.


It was a beautiful wedding, loretta.


Oh, thanks, della. I'm really gonna miss you.


Oh, don't you worry about that.


You'll be seeing me in denver.


I go skiing in colorado every winter.


You'll be seeing me, too, loretta.


Mom and I have a date for christmas


At the winter club med.


Nell, maybe you and your mama can join us at aspen.


Nah. We'll be on devil's island.


I'm really, really looking forward


To seeing you out there.


Let's go, addy.


We can just about make the happy hour


At the old rebel inn.


Ooh, mama, do they still have those southern-fried nachos?


Oh, yes.


I love those things.


Bye, you two.


Bye-bye. Bye, honey.


Okay, nell, okay.


What I did to you wasn't fair.


Just because I've had mama on my shoulders all these years


Does not mean that I have the right


To just hand you a ticket


And ship her off to glenlawn with you.


Oh, honey!


You mean you're gonna take mama to denver with you?


No!


Ow!


Nell...


I'm starting a whole new life.


And there's just no room in it


For anyone except howard and jerome.


I'm sorry, honey.


Look...


I want you and howard and jerome


To have a wonderful life in denver.


[ Chuckles ]


And I hope y'all freeze to death.


I'd better go get dressed.


Oh, loretta? Yeah?


I bet you can't wait to tell mama


How I feel about her coming to glenlawn, can you?


Now, why would I do that?


Because when we were little girls,


That's all you ever did do -- was run to mama and snitch.


Nell, you were always getting away with everything.


What?! Well, I never got away with anything.


I had to be the good little girl.


Don't knock it! That's how you became mama's favorite!


You were daddy's favorite.


That's different! No, it's not!


You're right. I-i'm sorry.


Look, nell...


Now you can be mama's favorite.


Oh, uh, by the way, she gets up at .


Loretta?


Uh...


[ Sighs ]


You were a beautiful bride.


I'm gonna run and tell mama you said that.


[ Gasps ]


[ Sighs ]


Hickory, dickory, dock.


The mouse ran up --


What are you doing, aunt nell?


I was just, um...


Thinking about when I was a little girl.


Oh.


I was just getting a little worried


Because you look so sad.


I love you, joey.


Come on, sit down with me.


Well, mister, I guess you know


You're gonna have to go upstairs


And finish packing, hmm?


Mm-hmm.


Did you tell jerome goodbye?


Yeah.


Boy, is he happy he's moving to denver.


Yeah? I thought he would miss all his friends.


Well, he's not gonna miss your mother.


She never lets him do anything.


And all she ever says is, "no. Because I said so."


Okay, young man, I think it's time we had a little talk.


Come on. Come on, sit on my lap. Come on. Sit down.


We are going to talk about mothers.


You know, joey...


Sometimes a mother has to tell a child "no."



"No, you cannot eat that.


"No, you can't watch the television show.


No, you cannot go outside without a sweater."


And, you know...


They say it because they care about you.


Did you know that sometimes


The mother that seems the meanest and the nastiest


Is just trying to cover up for a heart of gold?


Your mother's coming to glenlawn, isn't she?


You think you are so smart.


Get off my lap. Go upstairs and pack.


Aw, just what I need -- two mothers.


Mama. Hmm?


The wedding was beautiful,


And loretta made a beautiful bride.


Yeah, she and howard are gonna be very happy.


Mama, why are you cleaning up?


You know della's coming over to do it for you.


Nell, you forget -- I was married to a minister.


Cleanliness is next to godliness.


Mama, heaven ain't this clean.


It will be when I get there.


You know, mama, joey is really excited


About your coming to glenlawn to live with us.


First thing I'm gonna do is cut that boy's hair.


Mama? Hmm?


You know, when you come and live with us,


You're gonna have your own room,


And you're gonna be like our guest.


And you won't have to worry about anybody but yourself.


You know, the girls and the whole family,


They're really good at doing that themselves.


Mm-hmm.


What you're trying to tell me, nell,


Is you want me to stay in my room,


Mind my own business.


I'll be a prisoner. You'll slide my food under my door.


Well, you don't have to worry, honey.


I will stay in my room.


I won't come out and try to be a part of the family.


Mama, that's not what I meant.


We want you to be a part of the family.


Good. Then I'll cut the boy's hair.


Hey, mama? Hmm?


You know what?


I like joey's hair the way it is.


We never did agree on much, did we, nell?


No, mama, I guess we didn't.


You were always hard to get along with.


You never listened to me.


Mama, I listened to you.


I just didn't like everything you had to say.


You wasn't supposed to like everything I had to say.


Why not, mama?


Because I said so!


See? You never listen to me.


Mama, I listened to you.


You never talked to me! You yelled at me!


You talked to loretta!


Loretta respected me. She loved me.


She wasn't always in trouble,


And she didn't run off the first chance she had.


Oh, yes, she did, mama. Howard was her first chance.


How can you talk about your sister like that


On her wedding day?


Did you learn that in california?


Yep, right after I learned how to surf.


The difference between you and your sister


Is that you're always thinking about yourself.


You wanted a singing career,


So you dropped out of high school.


You didn't like living in alabama,


So you moved to california.


You didn't like this family,


So you went off and got yourself another one.


Listen, woman, let me put a bee in your bonnet.


Do you think it was easy for me being out there by myself?


Do you think it was easy, my being on my own?


Maybe I did have a marriage that didn't work out.


Maybe I did have a career that didn't work out.


But I left because I had to take a chance, mama.


Oh, why am I talking to you? You don't understand anything.


You are so selfish.


What?!


You heard me.


You think you're the only one


That ever wanted to take a chance?


Are you trying to tell me


That you ever wanted to take a chance of something, mama --


Anything?!


Nell, when I was ,


I wanted to go to new york and become a dancer.


You what?


Don't you remember


All those katherine dunham posters I had?


Is that why you've been so mad at me all these years?


Because I left and did the things that you wanted to do?


Were you jealous of me, mama?


Nonsense.


A mother is never jealous of her daughters --



Ever!


By the way, I'm not going to glenlawn.


What do you mean, you're not going to glenlawn?


I'm staying right here.


Mama, with me in california and loretta in denver,


Who's gonna look after you?


I don't need anyone to look after me!


Mama, you can't be on your own!


Why not?


Because I said so!


Nell, you don't understand.


I was a minister's wife -- and a good wife.


I was the mother of a minister's children --


And a good mother.


But I'll be damned if I'm gonna be a minister's widow.


Mama!


I am bored!


What?


Bored!


They called on me to attend every church social,


Every funeral, every wedding.


Nell, last month,


I went to three weddings and two funerals.


I got so mixed up, I threw rice at the undertaker.


[ Both laugh ]


Mama, it's good to see you laugh.


Oh, nell, I think I'm gonna laugh a lot more now.


I'm gonna take my chance now.


I'm not going to worry about you or loretta or anyone.


Mnh-mnh. I'm gonna look after me.


Watch my smoke.


Where you going?


Oh, over to the happy hour at the old rebel inn.


Mama, you can't go to the old rebel inn.


You don't even know how to order a drink.


Don't worry, honey.


I'm going over there to find della,


Get her to sell this house,


Buy me a condominium -- one bedroom.


Why one bedroom?


You only come home every three years.


You can sleep on the couch.


You got a deal, mama.


Mmm.


[ Chuckles ]


I'll see you, honey.


Uh, mama?


Hmm?


Um...


Just in case it doesn't work out...


There's always room for you in glenlawn.


No way.


Why not?


[ Snickers ]


Because I said so.


[ Sighs ]


♪ Happy days are here again


♪ The sky above is clear again


♪ Let us sing a song of cheer again ♪


♪ Happy days are here again


Ooh!


♪ Gimme a break


♪ Gimme a break