05x04 - The Man From Zoron

[bunniefuu]

♪ Gimme a break, now I know what it takes ♪



♪ Gimme a break, now I know what it takes ♪


♪ I'm putting a new face on the old one ♪


♪ Ready for anything


♪ Playing with fate, not a moment too late ♪


♪ I'm showing the whole world nothing can get me down ♪


♪ O-o-o-oh


♪ Gimme a break


♪ Yeah, yeah ♪ gimme a break


♪ 'Cause I sure need one ♪ gimme a break


♪ Yeah, yeah ♪ I finally know where I belong ♪


♪ Gimme a break


♪ Yeah, yeah ♪ gimme a break


♪ 'Cause I sure need one ♪ gimme a break


♪ Yeah, yeah ♪ I finally know where I belong ♪


♪ Gimme a break!


When's the bus coming, aunt nell?


When it gets here, baby, it'll be here, okay?


Aunt nell, can I drop the quarters in the box?


Okay. Open your hand.


Let's see. Here you go.


One, two, three, four.


Uh, excuse me, miss. I don't have the exact change.


Could you change a dollar?


Oh, sure.


Hey! Aaaah!


[ Tires screech, horn blares ]


Oh, baby, are you all right?


Joey, I almost lost you!


Hey, is the kid all right? Yeah, he's fine.


No problem. He's okay. He okay?


Oh, bless you. Thank you. Thank you.


Thank you so much for saving my baby's life.


Beginner's luck.


Beginner's luck?


If you hadn't have pulled him out of the way,


That bus could have k*lled my baby.


Oh, you're a hero.


Me? Oh, no, no. I'm no hero.


Although I did get a cousin to stop smoking.


Unfortunately the next day he was hit by a bus.


Oh, hey, wait!


Oh, you missed your bus.


Well...


There's always another bus.


Excuse me.


I owe you so much for saving my baby's life and all. Uh...


Have you had lunch yet? No, I haven't.


Then it's settled. I don't want to hear any back talk.


You're coming home with me. Come on.


I didn't know you people took strangers into your homes.


That's a frightening story. You're so brave.


Joey is really lucky you were there to save him.


He once stopped his cousin from smoking.


This is delicious.


What did I just eat?


Tomato soup.


Oh, it's very interesting.


What's it made of?


Tomatoes.


We don't have tomatoes where I come from.


Ta-da!


In honor of our hero, a hero sandwich.


Oh, how do you like that?


I'm in town minutes, and they name a sandwich after me.


Oh, dave, are you ever cute.


Yes, I am.


You know...


That soup filled me up.


Could I take this home with me?


Of course you can.


So, uh, dave, where you from?


Oh, not too many people have heard of it.


It's called zoron.


Oh. I think I drove through there once on my way to alabama.


[ Chuckles ] no, I don't think so.


You see, zoron is not in your solar system.


Neither is alabama.


[ Laughs ]


Nell, I think he's trying to tell us he's from outer space.


Wow!


Aunt nell, I finally met somebody from outer space!


Aaaah!


I just knew that sooner or later


An alien would show up here in glenlawn.


So, tell me, dave, do you know darth vader?


Who?


You know, "star wars."


Star wars.


Oh, yes, your president's defense plan for outer space.


No, he means "star wars" the movie.


Oh, I don't see many movies.


My area on zoron doesn't get cable.


Doesn't get cable.


Uh, all right, dave, just exactly where are you from?


Zoron.


Hi.


Then you're really telling us that you're from another planet.


Yeah, but I don't tell it to a lot of people.


You never know how they're going to react.


Oh, look. You people put your fish in water.



Uhh!


Uh, dave, may I ask you a personal question?


Just what are you doing here on planet earth?


Vacation.


Vacationing. Did you hear that, joey?


Isn't that nice?


This nice man is on a vacation from zoron,


And he came all the way from outer space


In this hawaiian shirt.


Yeah.


Oh, no, no. I got the shirt in sacramento.


You see, there was a mix-up, and my luggage went to mars.


Mars.


Okeydoke.


Look, I'll be right back.


I'm going to get a baggy for your hero, okay?


[ Laughing ]


So, uh, dave, old pal,


Do you have any pictures of zoron?


No. The electron configuration of matter on zoron


Doesn't respond to earth-type optics.


What does that mean?


Pictures don't come out.


Beep-beep-beep-beep- beep-beep-beep.


Hi, everybody.


Hey, katie, come meet my new best pal, dave.


He's an alien.


Oh, an alien. Buenos días.


Katie and dave should get along great.


Yeah, well, it was really nice meeting you, dave.


Oh, um, adíos.


Uh, can I please see you in the kitchen a minute, julie?


I need help with the nutcake.


The man is loony tune.


I think he's kind of cute.


Cute?


Oh, he's probably a harmless eccentric just having some fun.


Julie, the man has joey believing he's from outer space.


Nell, he hasn't said anything that's impossible, you know.


A lot of people believe that earth


Isn't the only planet with intelligent life.


Why me?


Come on, nell. We don't want to be rude to our guest.


Oh, no.


We don't want to upset dave,


'Cause he might get mad and throw a lunar eclipse.


So, that's the way kids learn on zoron.


Isn't that neat, julie?


It certainly is.


Dave, do you people come here often?


Oh, yes, yes.


The heightened intergalactic molecular activity


Facilitates it,


As well as the closening of our interplanetary contact.


That makes sense.


That's how I got here.


Through molecular activity?


Yep, the old m.a. [ Chuckles ]


I've got a schedule right here.


You know, since they went private,


The service has kind of run down,


But once in a while you can get -- oh, no!


What's wrong?


I've lost my traveler's checks.


Were they american express?


No, zoron first national.


Oh, that's too bad.


Hey, maybe they're with your luggage on mars.


Of course! That's where they are.


Phew! [ Chuckles ]


Hey, put 'em there, pal.


What's that?


This is the way we shake hands on zoron.


Come on, put 'em there.


Hey, aunt nell, look!


This is the way they shake hands on zoron.


And do you know what else about zoron?


What, honey?


If a kid doesn't want to go to school, he can stay home.


We have a different educational system.


We use an electron transfer of thought process


Instead of going to school.


I've just got to get to that planet.


Just take the number bus and change at saturn.


Uh, excuse me.


I, uh, got to check on that nutcake.


The man wants joey to drop out of school


And to go to zoron...


Into outer space...


On the bus.


I think you're right about dave.


He seems a little too caught up in his own fantasies.


I think I'd better call the state mental institute


To see if they're missing a space cadet.


Nell, when you get them, what are you gonna tell them?


You don't even know his name.


Oh, julie, don't be so dumb.


You heard the man. He said his name is dave.


Dave what?


I'll get back to you on that.



All kids on zoron stay up as late as they like.


The solar cycle is much longer.


Oh, dave?


Yes, nell?


You know, we're having such a good time with you and all,


And we really want to keep in contact with you


When you go back...


Up there.


Anyway, what did you say your last name was?


I don't have one. What?


On zoron, we don't have last names.


[ Chuckles ]


Dave, listen, I didn't just get off the greyhound bus


With a chicken, you know?


I know that everybody in outer space has a last name.


There's flash gordon. There's buck rogers.


There's even mr. Spock.


Nope. On zoron, we don't have last names.


But...you can't be the only dave there.


How do they tell you apart?


Oh, well, there's old dave, young dave, fat dave,


Thin dave, tall dave, short dave...


Cheap dave.


Hold it. Which dave are you?


Oh, well, you guessed it before. I'm cute dave.


Cute dave.


Okay.


Cute dave jr., Actually.


See, my father was cute, too, and my grandfather.


Our whole family's been cute for generations.


Would you excuse me? I have to check on the nutcake.


The man is bricks shy of a full load.


I still think he's kind of cute.


That's his name -- cute dave.


[ Knock on door ]


Oh.


Hi, simpson.


Yeah, hiya, julie.


Simpson, thank heaven you are here.


Listen, I got to get to class, but nell really needs your help.


Yeah, I need a cup of coffee.


Simpson, please, that can wait.


Oh, please, nell, huh? I'm bushed.


The switchboard's been lit up like a christmas tree.


I must have had crazies call in,


Tell me they spotted a u.f.o.


Simpson, let me get this straight. Calls.


U.f.o.


Glenlawn.


Yeah.


One of them was from the mayor.


The mayor?


Do you mean dave is really from...


Oh, come on, nell. Get it together.


That is impossible.


Hmph.


Then again, if mayor hopkins says that he saw a u.f.o.,


That...


Simpson, listen.


Are you sure it was the mayor who called?


Oh, yeah.


I know his voice.


Last month he called


When he seen a giant crab coming up from the river.


The mayor has a fondness


For an occasional tequila sunrise.


Simpson, listen.


There is a man in my living room who says he's from zoron.


Now, I want you to go in there and arrest him.


Gee, nell, there's no law against being from out of town.


I come from bakersfield originally myself.


Simpson... I'm talking about outer space!


And he wants to take joey back with him on the number bus!


No kidding.


That bus goes right by my house.


Simpson, then get on the bus and arrest him!


[ Laughs ]


Calm yourself, nell.


This guy sounds like he's probably just one of them,


You know, harmless eccentrics.


I know how to handle cases like this.


They gave us a lot of this stuff at the police academy.


And I never miss an episode of "miami vice."


Simpson!


Please, nell, you just humor him along,


And he won't feel threatened, and he'll go away.


Hey.


You just might be right.


Sure.


You got to be gentle with these people, you know?


Listen to their problems, laugh at their jokes.


Yeah, you just might be right.


Either that or I could just go in there and rough him up.


Thanks, simpson.


Oh, yeah. Anytime, nell, huh?


And thanks for the coffee.


♪ Dum-bum-bum-bum, da-dum ♪


Look, aunt nell!


Dave was just telling me he used to be a dancer on zoron.


Oh, so zoron's a big show-business planet, huh?



Oh, yes, indeed.


So, that's why they don't need last names.


It's just sammy, frank, liza.


That's right -- small sammy, thin frank...


Nervous liza.


Come on, nell, join in.


Anything you say.


♪ Dee-dee-dee


Oh, you know this? Sure.


♪ Doo-doo-doo, doo-doo ♪


The grapevine and the break.


♪ Dum-bum-bum


♪ Ja-bum-bum-bum, bum-bum ♪


The back essence. [ Humming ]


I never dreamed when joey and I


Were at the bus stop this morning...


That we would end up dancing with an alien.


We could use you on zoron, nell.


You have a natural rhythm.


[ Resumes humming ]


Thank you.


I imagine that, uh...


You'll be leaving soon?


Depends on how much fun I'm having.


Okay, everybody. Let's take it home.


The big finish. Trenches.


♪ Da-bum and...


♪ Dum, da-dum, dum-dum, dum-dum ♪


♪ Bum, bum, ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-bum-bum-bum ♪


And the bow.


♪ Bum


That was great, dave.


Aunt nell, let's go to zoron.


It sounds like so much fun.


We'll see, okay?


Uh, dave, would you please excuse us?


Um, joey got a little overheated,


And I need to wipe him down.


I'll be right back, dave.


Adíos.


Isn't dave the greatest guy in the world?


Yeah.


You know, honey, sometimes people will tell us things


That, um, they'd like to believe.


You know, like dave.


Dave would like to believe that he's from outer space.


[ Chuckles ]


And me, well, I would like to believe


That I'm the most beautiful woman in the world.


You are the most beautiful woman in the world.


Oh, I know that.


But I don't believe


That dave is from outer space.


You don't like dave, do you?


Hey, that's not true.


I like dave.


He saved your life.


But that doesn't mean that I won't step in


And try to protect an innocent, trusting little boy


That's only years old.


Dave says he's only .


Hey, dave!


[ Laughs ]


Dave says he's only .


Why me?! [ Sobs ]


Uh, I'll get that.


Joey, why don't you run upstairs, baby,


And get your camera?


Okay! Good idea!


A camera. Great. Could you take a picture of joey for me?


I'd like to take it back -- oh, I get it.


You want to take a picture of me


Because I told you zoronians can't be photographed.


You still don't believe me.


Why shouldn't I believe you?


You're from a tap-dancing planet that doesn't have a fotomat.


Why me?


I asked first!


Look, I'm not some hick from venudo, you know?


I shouldn't have told you anything about zoron.


Every time we come here, it's the same old story.


You either claim we're a weather balloon


Or you call us swamp gas,


Which I find a fairly insulting nickname.


Hold on. You got me all wrong.


I have nothing against you.


I just don't want you confusing joey.


But joey isn't the one who's confused.


He believes me when I talk about all the fun we have on zoron.


That's exactly my point.


I don't want joey growing up


Believing every silly, little thing that he hears.


Why not? I did. Silly things can be true.


A lot of people told columbus he was silly, too.


But if he'd believed them,


Who would they have named that city in ohio after?


All right.


I'll admit that sometimes it is hard


For me to accept new things.


But then again, I am not years old anymore.



If you lived on zoron, you would be.


Oh, it's too bad people on earth have to grow up.


Our minds stay as young and as fresh as joey's.


We never get old.


Dave, if I believed that,


I would be at that bus stop like a sh*t.


Nell, look, don't worry.


I'll leave, and I won't let joey come with me.


Thank you.


Put new film in and everything!


Uh, look, would it be pushing things


If I asked for some of that exotic tomato soup?


Of course not. Coming right up.


I'd like to take some back home with me


For my girlfriend, easy alice.


All right, cute.


Coming right up.


♪ Da-da-da-dum


♪ Da-dum


♪ Da-dum, da-dum


I'm going to put some crackers in with the soup


For your girlfriend, easy alice.


[ Humming ]


Boy, you're sure in a good mood.


I most certainly am.


Dave and I came to an agreement --


That he's leaving.


Hmm. I think he's cute.


So does he.


He also thinks he's from another planet.


[ Chuckles ]


Oh, which one?


Baby, why don't you just go in the living room


And keep dave and joey company?


There's nobody in the living room.


Joey.


Joey!


Whoa, dave.


He lied to me!


He took my child, that man from zoron!


Is this the bus I take if I want to come visit you?


Uh...


I meant to talk to you about that, joey.


See, my apartment on zoron is a little small for visitors.


Why don't we just wait until I get another vacation,


And then I'll come back here and see you?


Okay.


Well, I got to go, joey.


Hey, wait a second, dave.


Excuse me, mister,


Can you please take a picture of my friend and me?


Joey, I told you it won't come out.


Please, dave?


At least I'll have a picture of where you were standing.


Wait! I don't think we got it!


I got to go, joey.


But, dave!


Oh, hey.


[ Chuckles ] so long, pal.


Bye.


Bye, joey.


Bye!


See you soon. Okay!


Joey! Joey.


Why did you leave the house?


Oh.


Honey, just -- I'm just so happy that you're all right, okay?


Dave left, aunt nell.


He's on his way back to zoron.


Sweetheart, don't be so sad, okay?


Look, let's just hope that he has a very safe trip, all right?


Now smile.


Come on.


Nah!


♪ Gimme a break


♪ Gimme a break


♪ Gimme a break