06x20 - German for Beginners and a Crazy Old Man with a Bat

[bunniefuu]

Previously on Young Sheldon...

I reached out to a colleague who's doing

a summer research program
at the University of Heidelberg,

and I think I can get you in.

Heidelberg, Germany?

Yes, and they're doing exciting work

on superstrings.

Well, that would certainly help
my grad school applications.

Ich helfe dir beim packen.

That's German for "I'll help you pack".

GEORGE JR.: If we put in
one of them things that spins

the hot dogs around,
we would make a fortune.

Oh, then they spill
mustard on themselves,

it's right back in the washer.

That's money making money, sister.

Yeah, 'cause that's how people want

their clothes to smell... like hot dogs.

I love how hot dogs smell.

Huh. And you wonder
why Mandy won't marry you.

[MACHINE CHIMING]

Wade, what the hell are you doing here?

We're not open yet.

The door was.

Did you forget to lock up?

No.

Well, the door didn't open itself.

The lock's busted.

File cabinet, too. Cashbox is gone.

We've been robbed.

We've been robbed.

We've been robbed?

♪ Nobody else is stronger than I am ♪

♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪

♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪

♪ I am a mighty little man ♪

♪ I am a mighty little man. ♪

Looks like they jimmied
the door with a crowbar.

Sure does.

DALE: Well...

it's a lucky break

that when it happened, nobody was here.

If I had been here,

we'd be looking for a place
to bury the body.

Yours or theirs?

So, what's the next step?
What are you gonna do?

I was gonna get some lunch.

DALE: Wait a minute.

Aren't you gonna file a report

or-or dust for fingerprints?

Yeah, what are we paying you for?

You're paying me to not shut you down.

Unless you want me to bring detectives

to your illegal gambling room.

So, what do we do?

You need security when you're not here.

Maybe an off-duty cop.

You want me to pay you more?

I just want you to feel safe.

Get out.

Y'all have a nice day.

♪ ♪

I brought you some snacks.

For Mom,

a Bavarian-style pretzel.

And for Dad,

four Lone Star beers
poured into a pitcher

to approximate a stein.

What do you want?

For starters, a danke wouldn't k*ll you.

- A what?
- It's "thank you" in German.

Uh, so, if you were
thinking of thanking,

then you'd be denken of danken.

You're awfully quiet.
I assume you're denken.

W-Where are you going with all this?

If I play my cards right, Germany.

- What?
- I have the opportunity to participate

in a prestigious summer program
at the University of Heidelberg.

- Sheldon, I don't...
- I know that you're probably gonna say

that I'm too young or it's too far away,

but please just hear me out.

He did bring us snacks.

Beer is not a snack.

Sheldon... [SIGHS]

aren't there programs that are closer?

Yes, but I missed my chance
to get into any of them.

In fact, Dr. Sturgis
had to call in a big favor

to get this opportunity.

Well, that's nice of him,

but maybe he should have
talked to us first?

Oh, he suggested that.

- And?
- I nixed it.

You nixed it?

From the German nichts.

The language lends itself to negativity.

Well, we're gonna have to talk
to Dr. Sturgis

before we make any decisions.

- We're not making any promises.
- Mm-hmm.

This is not a yes.

But it's also not a nein,
which German for "no",

as opposed to the number nine,
which is neun.

Thanks. Come again.

Let me know if you need help
finding anything.

Ugh. How about something fun
to do in this town?

You like roller rinks?

No.

Bowling?

No.

You old enough to drive?

No.

Can't help you. Just move here?

I'm staying with my aunt
and uncle for the summer.

If you want, I can rent you
a rated-R movie.

I'll even slip it in a Disney box.

What do you have in mind?

Point Break.
Keanu Reeves, Patrick Swayze?

I like Swayze.

I like Keanu.

Great, so I don't need to fight you.

All right, Point Break
in a Bambibox coming right up.

You can put that on my uncle's
account. It's Jeff Difford.

Like Pastor Jeff?

Yeah.

He's my neighbor.

You're staying right next door to us.

Maybe we can watch it together.

Not at my house. My mom
can't know I rented you this.

Well, my uncle can't know
I'm watching it.

We could watch it in our garage.
My brother's got a TV in there.

Cool.

He kind of looks like Patrick Swayze.

Really?

But, like, a stupid Patrick Swayze.

Eh. Still works.

STURGIS: I understand your trepidation,

but you were also nervous about

sending him here,
and that turned out fine.

I suppose, but Germany
is just so far away.

Well, maybe it'd be good for him.

You know... a little independence,

nobody babying him. [CHUCKLES]

What? Germans are a tough-love people.

[SIGHS] Is this trip really
that important for him?

The string theory research they're doing

is at the forefront of the field.

This is a tremendous opportunity
for Sheldon.

Well, we wouldn't want him to miss out.

And you're okay with
looking after him all summer?

- Oh, I won't be there.
- You won't?

Oh, no, I'll be presenting
a paper in Needles, California.

If you're a Peanuts fan,

that's where Snoopy's brother
Spike lives.

Hold on, are you saying Sheldon would be

going to Germany by himself?

Well, one of you could go with him.

And the university would
cover our expenses as well?

[LAUGHS] The university
isn't gonna pay for any of it.

Okay, meeting adjourned.

Great. Well, let me know

if there's anything else
I can, uh, help you with.

Actually there is. Um...

Would you tell Sheldon
that he's not going?

Thank you.

Hey.

Everything going okay?

Yep.

Anyone suspicious hanging around?

Just a crazy old man with a bat.

I'm just trying to make sure
that you're safe.

That's very sweet,
but I-I can handle it.

You can, huh?

You ever think this might have
been an inside job?

Like, any one of these clowns here

could have been part of the crew
that ripped you off

last night?

And now they're sitting here

- giving me my money back?
- Mm.

Not all criminals
are masterminds, Connie.

Okay, fine. What's your plan?

Until we track down the guys

or girls...

I'm a-I'm a modern thinker...

I'll be around,

acting as a deterrent...

with my friend here.

MEEMAW: Lil' Slugger.

Yeah.

It only looks small 'cause I'm so big.

[MACHINES CHIMING]

Nice-looking watch you got there.

Thanks.

Is it new?

Actually, yeah.

Interesting.

You recently come into some money?

Kind of. My uncle just passed away.

Oh. Well, ain't that a coincidence?

What from?

Emphysema.

He smoke?

Yeah.

All right, then.

Maybe instead of
harassing the customers,

why don't you go over
and stand by that door

and just look intimidating?

[WHISPERS]: You got it. Watch this.

You want a chair?

Chair would be good. Yeah.

Let me go get my inflatable donut.

[WHISPERS]: Got a
little fire in the valley.

[DOOR CLOSES]

INSTRUCTOR [ON TAPE]:
When is the next train?

Wann faährt der naächste Zug?

Wann faährt der naächste Zug?

[SCOFFS] How is this not
a Romance language?

Shelly?

Uh, eintreten.

That's German for "enter".

Yeah, about that...

Uh, we had a long talk with Dr. Sturgis.

Oh, did he tell you how great
this program is

and what a boon it'll be to my career?

He did.

He also told us how much it costs,

and it's more than we can handle.

I'll pay you back.
I'm sure I'll make plenty

as a theoretical physicist.

I'm sure you will, but right now,

we don't have the money.

Have you considered
scrimping and saving?

I... Do we really need
breakfast, lunch and dinner?

Sheldon, you do our taxes.

And I'm about to start
charging for that.

Shelly, I'm sorry, but it's no.

Ach!

TONYA: I'll admit it.

Keanu's pretty cute.

Hey, you called Swayze,

you stick with Swayze.

Fine, I'll be Mrs. Patrick Swayze.

REEVES: Lose something, brah?

SWAYZE: Special Agent Utah.

Why'd you want to spend
the summer with Pastor Jeff?

I didn't. My parents found out
I had a boyfriend and freaked.

- Ooh, tell me everything.
- [MOVIE STOPS]

Okay, his name is Zach.

He has a learner's permit
and his own phone line.

So, like, a man?

Exactly.

[SCOFFS]

[MACHINES CHIMING]

I've got a bicycle pump if you want

to top off your donut.

No, actually, I'm experiencing
a little too much bounce.

I found something.

- What you got?
- I thought one of our neighbors

might have a security camera,

and Sensei Bruce at
the karate studio came through.

Oh, good job, Georgie.

And what'd you see?

A pickup truck driving away
from our back door

at : in the morning.

Ooh, now we got him. Or her.

- Did you get a license plate?
- No.

How about the color?

Well, the tape's in black and white.

But it was not black
and it was not white.

So the getaway car is a color.

Or grey.

Okay. Not quite a smoking g*n,

but at least we know
the perp drove a truck.

Excuse me.

Could I have everybody's
attention for just a minute?

Show of hands,

who here owns a truck?

It ain't my fault we live in Texas.

Did you take my boom box?

It's on my desk.

Next time, don't touch
my stuff without asking.

You're right, I'm sorry.

German for Beginners?

Why are you so weird?

I was hoping to spend
the summer in Germany.

The country in Europe.

Yes.

For the whole summer?

Yes. But Mom and Dad
said we can't afford it.

Oh, you can't take no for an answer.

You deserve this. I deserve this.

We deserve this.

What am I supposed to do?
We don't have the money.

I have $ saved up. It's yours.

It's a lot more than that.

Well, we're gonna figure this out.

Really?

We'll start with getting enough money

for a one-way ticket.

How do I get back home?

Who knows? You might love it there.

ADULT SHELDON: I know
we've had our differences,

but that's the moment
I learned just how much

my sister loved me.

Hey.

- Hey.
- Hey.

Where's CeeCee?

Oh, she went out with friends.

Is that nice?

Sorry.

Any luck tracking down the robbers?

Nope. We're gonna keep
the cashbox here for a while.

Great.

So now the money is here,
where we sleep.

Get your bat.

Yeah.

♪ ♪

[WHISPERS]: What are you doing?

Sneaking out. Come on.

Aren't you afraid
you're gonna get caught?

What are they gonna do,
send me to a crappier town?

Good point. So, what's the plan?

Got half a pack of cigarettes
and a bottle of cooking sherry.

Let me get dressed.

[DOOR CLOSES]

Well, backyard's clear.

All right. Copy.

Saw some skunks.

That'll work for us.
That's nature's alarm system.

You really think someone
might have followed us home?

Eh, probably not, but it's
better to be safe than...

Oh. What's that?

What?

DALE: Two people sneaking
around out there.

- What do we do?
- I don't know.

Well, should I turn the lights off?

Yeah, good.

Now, wait a minute,
if the lights are off,

they're gonna think nobody's home.

Oh, right.

But now they can see us.

Right. Off.

[GASPS] Duck, duck.

What are we doing?

Someone's awake at my meemaw's.

I think they saw us. [COUGHING]

You said you knew how to smoke.

I do, but this isn't my brand.

Come on, let's get out of here.

GEORGE JR.: There they go.

I think we scared them off.

Yeah, we did.

[CHUCKLES]

We are heroes.

- Damn straight.
- Yeah.

[CLATTERING]

Shelly.

It's : in the morning.
What are you doing?

Having a yard sale,
and the serious buyers

start early so I need to get a move on.

Is that my good china?

Oh, it's just one setting,

and if I'm in Germany,
you'll never miss it.

Give me that.

Fine.

But I am selling my trains,
my comic books

and the first chapter
of my autobiography.

It's in utero. You do not come off well.

Shelly, that is not gonna
get you to Germany.

I have to try.

[SIGHS] Let me put this away. I'll help.

Thank you.

- What are you doing up?
- Um, going to the bathroom?

- Why are you dressed?
- Why are you dressed?

I'm having a yard sale
to raise money for Germany.

Great, I'll help.

But why are you dressed?

To help you.

But I just told you about that.

And I'm ready to start.

- Okay. Wait, what?
- [DOOR CLOSES]

Well, I saw them
sneaking around outside.

They was clearly casing the place.

So I grabbed Lil' Slugger
and I went out the front porch

and I let 'em know
who they was messing with.

You think they'll be back?

Nah, they ran away like
two little girls. [CHUCKLES]

Ten dollars? I'll give you five.

Sir, that's a Lionel MPC-era O Gauge

that I've had since I was six.

You're lucky it's only ten.

Fine. Ten.

Uh, uh, I meant $ .

T-The tag says ten.

And now it's a thousand. Give that back.

Have a nice day.

How's he doing?

He's having a little trouble
letting go of things.

Ah-Ah! Look, don't touch.

- Morning, Mary.
- Pastor Jeff.

This is my niece Tonya.
She's staying with us.

- Hey, Missy.
- Tonya.

Oh. You've met.

Boy howdy, have they met.

That's what I need to talk to you about.

I'm gonna go help Sheldon.

- Why don't you stay?
- What's going on?

Missy rented Tonya an R-rated movie

and tried to hide it in a Disney box.

Oh, that's what this is about?

What else would it be about?

- Missy?
- It must have been an accident.

I thought I gave her Bambi.

I did ask for Bambi.

Sometimes people return things
in the wrong box.

It's my fault for not checking.

I'm really sorry.

Well, don't let it happen again.

This set was actually
endorsed by Professor Proton.

Who's Professor Proton?

Who's Professor Proton?

How much time do you have?

Arthur Jeffries, aka Professor Proton,

brought science to the masses

on his revolutionary television
show Professor Proton.

Actually, this set is not for sale.

ADULT SHELDON: Unfortunately,

my yard sale was a bust,
and my dream of spending

the summer in Germany was fading.

On the bright side,
I did get to keep all my trains.

And people say
I'm not emotionally complex.

[DOORBELL RINGS]

Dr. Linkletter.

I heard you're raising money

to study in Germany. Is that true?

Yes, but I'm not having any luck.

Oh, your luck's about to change.

Here's one week of my pay.

Wow, thank you.

Mm. Whatever it takes
to get you on that plane.

I also passed the hat
in the faculty lounge.

I don't know what to say.

I do. Auf Wiedersehen,
you little rascal.

[CHUCKLES]

GEORGE SR.: Who was that?

Dr. Linkletter. He just gave me

all this money for Germany.

Well, that's really something.

- [CHUCKLES]
- [KNOCKING]

Hello, Pastor Jeff.

Sheldon, George, good news.

I told the congregation about

your exciting opportunity in Germany,

and boy, were they thrilled
to help. [LAUGHS]

I've never seen
the collection plate so full.

Well, thank you.

Are you seeing this? I am beloved.

Sure.