13x90 - Christmas Special 2024

[bunniefuu]

MUSlC: Here comes Santa Claus
by Gene Autry

Oh, boy.

♪ Here comes Santa Claus, here comes
Santa Claus

♪ Right dawn Santa Claus Lane

♪ Vixen and Blitzen and all his
reindeers pulling on the reins... ♪

Found it!

♪ Children singing
All is merry and bright... ♪

CHUCKLES GLEEFULLY

Excuse me?
Wait.

Oh, the hat. Of course.

Thank you.

Looks good, huh?
Yes.

♪ Right dawn Santa Claus Lane

♪ He's got a bag that's filled
with toys for boys and girls again

♪ Hear those sleigh bells
jingle-jangle

♪ Oh, what a beautiful sight

♪ So jump in bed and cover your head

♪ Cos Santa Claus comes tonight... ♪

Well, is this the business, or what?

THEY CHUCKLE

You actually look quite sexy as Santa.

Hmm, so I should hope, Mrs Claus.

Ooh, Santa!

Now, do you fancy a
little ride on my sleigh?

SHE GIGGLES

All right, cheers, babe.
Yeah.

Yeah, so, this is the actual outfit
that I wore in the Christmas video.

I mean, most people didn't
know who I was.

It were just a bit of a cameo
for a laugh, you know?

So does it bother you it never got
to number one back in the day?

No chance.

I made shed-loads
out of writing that song.

I mean, it's the Christmas gift
that keeps on giving.

I mean, it were never really about
the charts or the record sales.

The biggest buzz I get is hearing it
being played over the radio

every Christmas,
or over the supermarket tannoy,

or some bloke banging it out
on a karaoke. You know what I mean?

♪ A Christmas paradise in the sun

♪ For me and you

♪ Oh-oh, a-whoa-oh, oh-oh

♪ My Christmas paradise is you!

♪ Oh-oh, a-whoa-oh, oh-oh

♪ My Christmas paradise is you! ♪

He has really made an effort
with his outfit.

Oh, Stuart is nothing if not committed.

At least he's not out of tune
like others I could mention!

SHE SCOFFS
THEY LAUGH

Can you send me the sales figures
for the last quarter, please?

How you doing, Mrs Hammond?

You fancy having a go?

Oh, not sure it's quite my scene.

Still working?
You're supposed to be on holiday!

What about a rum punch
to loosen you up, huh?

Or... maybe I'll just leave you to it?

♪ A Christmas paradise in the sun
for me and you

♪ Oh-oh, a-whoa-oh, oh-oh... ♪

Right, that's my cue for bed.

♪ Oh-oh, a-whoa-oh, yeah-ah

♪ My Christmas paradise is you! ♪

Yeah, Caz, I swear, he's sound asleep.

In bed eight o'clock on the dot,
just like you said.

Excuse me, you haven't seen a small
boy - brown hair, freckles,

was playing with some
other kids, have you?

Yeah, I think they're down on the beach.

Yeah, Caz, I promise you,
I have not lost our son.

Caz?

Caz?

Ollie, are you dawn there, mate?

Dad?

It's bedtime.
The other kids are staying up.

Yeah, well, their parents haven't got

your mum on their back, have they?
Please let me stay up.

Look, you don't want
to blow it with Santa

after you've been so good
this year, right?

Come on, let's go.

PHONE BUZZES

Yeah? Yes, Caz.

Yeah, I promise he'll be in bed
within five minutes.

Give it up for Stuart, everyone!

CHEERlNG

Hey, hey, hey -
Father Christmas himself!

Ho-ho-ho! Woo!

There is still time for you to get
your name down if you want to sing,

but right now we're going to do
Christmas Caribbean style!

Yay!

Oh, my gosh, you were so good!
You were brilliant!

I'm sweating buckets in this.
I might go and get changed.

I told you you'd be too hot,
you big idiot.

Hey, you can't call
Father Christmas an idiot!

SHE GIGGLES

Cheers, guys!

Hey, let me know about
the transmission, yeah?

Hi there. Excuse me?
Mm?

I think there's a dead man on the beach.

LlNE RlNGS

Sarge...

...we've got a body
at the Paradise Bay Hotel.

All right, Darlene, I'm on my way.

Commissioner. You've heard?

Yes.

I thought we could head over
there together.

How are we going to do this, sir...

...without a replacement
for DI Parker yet?

There's no local
senior detective available,

so I put in a call to London

requesting a DI be sent over
as soon as possible.

OK. Thank you.

Did they tell you how long it will
take for someone to get here?

No. What with the Christmas holidays
upon us, it won't be any time soon.

So, what do we have?

The victim is Stuart Fullwell,

here on a Christmas break
with his fiancee.

He got dressed up to go to
the bar for a drink last night.

Half past nine, he headed back
to his bedroom to get changed.

Wasn't seen again until his body was
spotted by one of the other guests.

PHONE RlNGS
Ah, excuse me.

OK. Commissioner Patterson speaking.

Commissioner Patterson, it's
Marcus from resources and staffing.

Some good news for you.
We checked our records

and it turns out we already have
a detective out there.

Here? On the island?

On Saint Marie.

Yeah, I'm at the airport now.

If I can actually get out of the taxi.

Listen, mate, I don't want to say
it's been the holiday from hell,

but it's not far off.

No, no, the...

No, the people are nice enough,

but it's like everything
moves at half the normal speed.

Seriously, it's like
stepping back in time.

'Souse me.

The important thing is
I managed to change my flight.

Yeah.

Of course it cost me extra,

but worth it if it gets me
out of here, right?

Hello?

Great.

You still there?

Yeah, that's the other thing -
the signal out here's terrible.

God knows how they manage.

Listen, I'm calling the guv
the second I land, mate,

let him know I'm returning early.
CALL WAITING BEEP

Hang on, mate.

That's funny, that's him calling now.

Listen, let's grab a beer
when I get back, all right?

Yeah, see you.

Guv, I was just talking about you.

Yeah, yeah, I am in Saint Marie now,
but I'm...

Me?

Listen, guv, I would love to,

but the thing is,
I'm actually leaving early.

Can't someone else do it?

But I'm actually on the plane right now.

It's literally about to take off.

Come on, guv, you're not seriously
going to make me

get off the plane now, are you?

Yeah, no, it's all good, guv.

Like you said, hopefully it'll be
done and dusted

and I'll be home in no time.

OK.

Unbelievable.

Come on, Ollie, don't be shy.
Tell them what you saw.

So you're a sheriff?

Me? No, I work for the local council.

Oh! Oh, sorry, him! Yes, yes.

He's, er...
He loves cowboys, all that stuff.

We're kind of like sheriffs.

See?

And you want to help
the good guys, right?

You were asleep, weren't you, bud?

Yeah. There was a bang outside,
like a g*n,

so I went onto the balcony.

I saw this man. He liked hurt.

He fell back, didn't move again.

And was anyone else there?

Someone ran away,
but I couldn't see who it was,

so I went downstairs to the reception.

I think there's a dead man on the beach.

Do we know what time this was?

Darlene checked the security
camera footage,

and it was 17 minutes past


It only takes a couple of minutes
to get to reception.

That means the sh**ting must have
happened about 10:15.

Miss Reed, can you think of any
reason as to why someone

would want to do this to your fiance?

No.

We've only been here for a few days.
We don't know anyone.

Excuse me.

Hi. Um, I didn't want to say
anything in there,

because it might be nothing,
but it's about Miss Reed.

Yesterday afternoon I overheard her
on the phone to her friend.

I don't know what to do, Ali.

Yeah, but I just... I just want it
all to go away.

She was in a state.

What am I going to do?

Saying she didn't want to be
with her fiance any more,

but she didn't know how to end it.

I just thought I should mention it.

Thank you.

PHONE RINGS

Shall I go speak with her, sir?

Officer Curtis?

Commissioner, we've had another
m*rder called in.

Only, the thing is, this one is also
dressed as Santa Claus.

Yeah. Yeah, I know I checked out
this morning,

but now I need my room back again.

Yeah, well, believe me,

we all get thrown curve balls
from time to time.

But, look, listen,
you've got my number, yeah?

Well, just call me or text me
if there's a problem, OK?

OK, thank you. Thank you.

Commissioner Peterson.

Patterson.
Patterson?

Yeah. Oh. Must have misheard.

The signal round here is well dodgy.

This is Detective Sergeant Naomi Thomas.

Inspector.

There isn't anywhere round here I
can get a takeaway coffee, is there?

Actually, you know what?
Forget that. Stupid question.

Um, let's go and see this
dead Santa of yours, yeah?

Right.

Well, this is a first.

And the other guy, the other Santa,
he was shot as well?

Both in the chest.

We've asked the lab to prioritise
comparing both b*ll*ts

once they've been recovered.

But the likelihood is
the same person shot both of them?

Inspector, Officer Darlene Curtis.

A pleasure to meet you, sir.
And you.

Our second victim's name is Tony Hurst.

And get this - he's a songwriter.

He only went and wrote my favourite
Christmas song ever,

A Christmas Paradise!
Bit of a legend, then.

There's a framed platinum disc
on the wall.

So, what do you make of it, Inspector?

Inspector?

In... Inspec...?

Where's he gone?

Inspector!

Gloves.

I want to see what gift our Santa
is holding in his hand.

His hand?

Pen.

Ta.

I once chased a Santa Claus
down Oxford Street.

Shoplifting.

The department store staff thought
he worked in the grotto,

but he was just some bloke
in a Santa outfit.

Talk about hiding in plain sight.

Do you think the k*ller had
something he wanted us to see?

Please... don't do this.

I'm begging you.
You don't have to do this.

Just tell me what it is you want
and we can sort it out.

g*nsh*t

Sir, look.


victim was shot.

For real?

If both murders
happened at the same time,

then we're dealing
with two separate K*llers.

Who seemingly agreed to k*ll their
victims at the exact same time,

in the exact same manner,
wearing the exact same costumes.

Interesting.

I just wanted to say that we
appreciate you agreeing

to stay on the island and help us
with the investigation.

Inspector?

Er, sorry, where are we now?

ROOSTER CROWS

The police station.

CHUCKLlNG
That's a police station?

Oh. That is the police station.

Right.

You're used to somewhere bigger?

Well, kind of.

And the team - it's not just the two
of them, is it?

There is another
uniform officer, Dwayne,

but he's taken his
Christmas holidays early.

Yeah. I'm sure he's earned it.

You do still have air con in there,
though, right?

Excuse me, Commissioner.

The press are wondering when there's
going to be a statement made.

There's already been talk of there
being a Santa serial k*ller.

So who's your media
and comms liaison officer?

You don't have one of them either.

Inspector, we are a small island,
with a small team,

with a small budget.

The sooner you get used to that
fact, the better.

Tell them I'll make a statement
in due course.

OK, sir.

HE SCOFFS

Commissioner.

I've updated Miss Reed
on our second m*rder,

and we're struggling to find
any link

between her fiance and Tony Hurst.

I swear Stu never met this guy.

We've checked Mr Fullwell's texts,
call register,

emails, checked his bank account.
Nothing.

The only thing we do have...

...is this.

DS Thomas mentioned about what
Tony Hurst did,

about how he wrote that song,
A Christmas Paradise, and...

STUART: ♪ A Christmas paradise
in the sun for me and you... ♪

This was last night at the party.

But we think it must... it must
be a coincidence.

So what's this I hear about you not
wanting to marry your fiance?

What? Sorry, who are you?

Dl Mervin Wilson. Nice to meet you.

So, apparently a witness heard you
saying you wanted to end things

with Mr Fullwell but didn't know how
to. That's right, isn't it?

It is.

So come on, then, what's the deal?

Is he allowed to speak to me like that?

Is it true?

I just... I wanted it so much.

You know, to be married and to have
kids like everyone else,

but I just do what I always do

and stayed with someone for
the wrong reasons and...

So you didn't love him,
you just convinced yourself you did?

That's...

That's why I had to call my friend,
because I didn't know what to do.

You know, calling off the wedding,
that was so huge and...

...disappointing my family, again,
another relationship down the drain,

and it just - it all got too much.

And now that's gone away.

What? No.

No, I didn't. I...

I wouldn't. That is not what happened.

Commissioner, Inspector, Sarge,
the lab's just called.

There's something you might
want to know.

Say that again.

The b*ll*ts recovered from both
victims' bodies have been compared,

and striation marks indicate...

...they were fired from the same g*n.

But that can't be.

Both victims were shot
at the same time.

How can the same g*n be used in
two separate murders that were

committed at the exact same time
miles apart from each other?

I don't know, but that is
what the lab is saying.

It's over. Stuart, you stupid idiot.

I feel I ought to say, on behalf of
the rest of the island,

this really isn't one of
our better hotels.

In fact, I would go as far as to say
it's possibly the worst.

Well, let's hope so, eh?

I'm still trying to work out
what this one star is for.

If you start to tire of its charms,

there is somewhere we can put you.

Good to know.

Anyway... Ah...

If you don't mind me asking,
how did you end up here?

Oh, it was all a bit
last-minute, really,

and this was the only place that
still had a room,

I guess with it being Christmas.

I meant, um, Saint Marie.

Oh, right.

A mate recommended it.

Ah. I see.

Yeah, no other reason than that, really.

But you haven't warmed to the island?

I just wasn't feeling it, you know?

I mean, some places you take to
and some you don't, right?

Oh.

And that's why you decided
to leave early?

Mm-hm.

PHONE VIBRATES

Sorry, got to get this.

Hello?

WOMAN: Oh, hi. Is that Mr Wilson?
Speaking.

Hi, Mr Wilson. It's Angelique
from Cariba Car Hire.

Just to say we dropped your car off
and left the keys with reception.

It's the same one you had
the last few days, the blue one.

OK. Thanks very much. Cheers.

Is that the police?

My name is Brianna Clemetson.

I saw the news this evening
about the two murders,

and I think I know
who the k*ller might be.

No, I don't know his name,

but I got the registration number.

MUSIC: Xmas Time
by Kaptain, David Ohana, Hugo Fabbri

Ah, it really is the season!

Old man, come and have a look at this.

Old man!

Oh, God, where he gone now?

Oh, morning, Bertrise, Winton.

Hope you'll make it this evening.

Thank you.

Oh, morning, Dwayne.

You coming to the Christmas fair?

Ah, no, sorry, Catherine.

Me and my father are going out on
the boat and we won't be back

till Boxing Day.

I wondered if the Commissioner might
have got you working on this

double m*rder case.

Why? What did he say?

It was him who signed off on
my holiday, you know.

And as far as I'm concerned
that's legally binding.

I haven't seen Selwyn.

I just know they're very busy.

Well, I'd made plans to go
fishing with my father,

and that's what we are doing.

If I can find him.

Oh, he's over there, talking with Tyrus.

Tyrus?

That toerag is shadier than
a palm tree at high noon.

'Souse me, Catherine.

As it's you, for an extra $5,
me throw in a box of crackers.

Me talking luxury brand. Yeah.

Hey, what's going on here with you two?

You all right, son?

No.

Officer Myers, always a pleasure.

Hmm? Pleasure?

You still owe my Auntie Delilah
a refund for that old

broke-dawn rickety radio you sold her.

She didn't get a peep out of it.

Well, if she has the receipt,
me be glad to exchange it,

but me na do refunds.

You don't do receipts either,
so go figure that.

And now you're trying to
fleece my father!

Just some Christmas supplies, Dwayne.

A couple of bottles of rum, some cigars,

so we can enjoy ourselves.

Right.

It's bootleg!

Really?

Now, you give him back his money,

or I'm going to arrest you for
selling counterfeit goods.

Your choice.

And a Merry Christmas
to the both of you.

And a Happy New Year to you!

And why are you dressed
like that anyway?

Haven't you seen the news?
What? No.

Me TV don't work. Why?

Then try reading a newspaper, then.

And you, you didn't even tell me
you were going... Ah, come on.

HE LAUGHS
I'm all right.

Yo, Anton?

Let me see that for a second.

I tell you, the island is really
shaken up by these murders,

and I have a list as long as
my arm of people thinking that

they know who the m*rder*r is.

I wouldn't be surprised if Santa
himself doesn't make

an appearance at some point.

You're in early, sir.

We've got another one.

I was heading home after work.

That was the night before last,
when the other sh**t happened.

No problem. Me have it all lined up.

I just need this sorting
before Christmas.

Tell her what time it was.



I remember noticing.

Hmm. And, ah, any reason why you
were - are - dressed...

...like this?

Me own a stall down the harbour.

Always like to spruce myself up
this time of year,

get the people in the spirit.

Too much gloom now in the world, right?

So what exactly happened?

Heard some movement over there.

Somebody there?

Then...

Bang! First shot missed me.

Second one clipped me.
g*nshots

Managed to get out
the way before the third.

And then what?

A car came round the bend.

Reckon it spooked whoever
was sh**ting at me.

I saw them running off.

OK, Tyrus.

It's been two days, man.

Why are you only reporting this now?

And don't go thinking
you can fob me off.

I'm not as easy-going as this lot.

You see, in my experience,
people tend not to keep quiet

about being shot - unless they've
got something to hide themselves.

Well, I might owe a llittle money,
if you get me.

So at first I thought it was someone
giving me a scare,

a warning, you know?

But then I read about
the other sh**t.

Inspector!

I've located one of the b*ll*ts.

I'll get it down to the lab
and then I'll keep looking.

But what if whoever did this,
what if they're still out there?

What if they want to finish off
what they started?

Is my life still in danger?

HE CLEARS THROAT

He's right.

I mean, how can we know for certain
they won't come back and try again?

He's going to need protection.

But how are we expected to do that, sir?

We're spread thin enough as it is.

MUSIC: Flying Home
by Tommy McCook

So, old man, what you reckon?

Some fishing and then a beer,

or a beer and then some fishing?

Definitely the second option.

Yes I!

Hey.

Ah!

So...

...this is the life, eh?

Mm. You, me, and the sea.

Yes.

RADIO: Lady Honore?

Lady Honore, this is
the coastguard calling.

Do you receive?

BOTH: Wesley!

You there, Dwayne?

Everything all right, Wesley?

Not for you, it isn't.

I've got Commissioner Patterson
here. He needs to speak with you.

Oh, no.

Ah!

Are you serious? I have to spend
Christmas in a safehouse?!

You'll be driven there now.

Now? And who is it I'm supposed
to be protecting?

The subject is a man called
Tyrus DeMille.

That no-mark?

We believe there is a genuine
threat to his life.

And what about my father's life?

We're supposed to be spending
Christmas together.

I've got it all planned.

It's OK.

I can take care of myself.

Nelson, honey, don't you worry
about that.

You can come and stay with me
and my aunties,

as long as you don't mind spending
time in a house full of women.

I don't mind at all.

HE LAUGHS

Dwayne, come on, we need to get going.

We'll make contact and update you
as and when.

Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas.

I'm spending Christmas
in a house full of women!

HE CHUCKLES

Catherine.

Oh.

Ready for the Christmas fair
this evening?

We're ready.

But whether it should still
go ahead, I don't know.

You're not going to cancel?

People are nervous, scared.

Then perhaps a few familiar faces
might offer some reassurance.

Hmm... Yeah.

Good.

STEEL BAND PLAYS JINGLE BELLS

We really should go do our bit, sir.

Ah, you know what?
As quaint as that looks,

I'll just stay here and, ah...

Commissioner?

I called Darlene.
She's on her way down.

And the Inspector?

Ah, he's...

...building up to it.

Commissioner.

It's Brianna Clemetson.

You probably don't remember me,
but we've crossed paths at church

a couple of times.

Yes, of course.

I wondered if you had a moment?

I spoke with one of your officers
about the two murders last night,

but I know how busy you all are.

There's someone I think you need to
be considering as a suspect.

Let's go and find somewhere
quiet to talk.

Imagine that.

Of all the people I get to spend
Christmas with,

Tyrus 'The Tea-leaf' DeMille!

Oh, you think I'm thrilled
about this?

Take a look at the sleeping
arrangements.

So where you sleeping?

In the bed.

I think we should take
turns on the sofa.

What sofa?

There's no way on earth I'm sharing
that tiny thing with you.

Dwayne, I know it's not
the Christmas you wanted,

but, seriously, you need to stop
being such a baby about it.

He's obviously used to a more
cosmopolitan environment than here.

Is that DI fancy-pants
you're talking about?

Naomi was just saying he can be
a little frank in his opinions.

Hmm!

Plain rude is what he is.

Honestly, he makes another comment
about how nothing out here

works properly, I swear I'm going
to get the pepper spray out.

Serious!

I just keep telling myself,
" It's just one case,

"and then he'll be gone." Yeah?

OK, thank you.

Inspector, let me
introduce you to Catherine.

She's our town mayor and owns
the best bar on the island.

All right? It's so nice to meet...
That was the lab on the phone.

The third b*llet is
a match for the other two,

which means for definite all three
victims were shot by the same g*n,

at the same time, in three
separate locations.

So riddle me that, DS Thomas.

Excuse me.

I'm a host this evening.

A pleasure meeting you, Mervin.

Thank you to the
Honore Town Steel Band,

and now a very special treat
for us all -

singers from St Xavierts Church.

CHEERlNG AND APPLAUSE

♪ O holy night

♪ The stars are brightly shining

♪ it is the night... ♪
Hush now.

♪ Of the dear Saviour's birth... ♪

And this man who has been parking
on your street...

Lurking.

...Why do you think he's a possible
suspect for the recent murders?

Because of the house
he's parked outside.

Old Mr Blanchard lives there,

and he works as a Father Christmas
for the grotto

at the supermarket up in Port Royal.
Mm.

Can you give me a description of
the man you've seen on your road?

Yes, he's...

He's right there.

Ah, sorry... That's him.

That man over there
in the green hat,

he's the one who has been
committing these murders. I - I...

I promise...
PEOPLE MURMUR

INDISTlNCT CHATTER

What's going on?

I think they're saying that
you're the k*ller, sir.

Believe me, believe me...

This is crazy.

You don't actually believe her,
do you?

Of course not.

But I do need to know why you were
hanging around this street.

Unless you deny it.

Look, it's not illegal, is it?

I mean, I'm not actually breaking
any laws, so...

So what's the big deal?

This is a small island, Inspector.

People talk.

And the last thing I need is them
talking about you as a suspect

in our m*rder case.

This is ridiculous, all right?

I mean, it's nobody's business
what I was doing here -

including yours, with respect.

So if you don't mind... Inspector.

And with equal respect,

I'm afraid to say it is my business,
as your senior officer,

heading up an investigation
in which your name

has come under the spotlight.

I have every right to insist
you explain yourself.

Inspector...

...please.

Tell me.

All right. Erm...

I, erm...

I think...

I think that's my mother's house.

Sorry?

My mum lives there, I think.

You think?

Well, I mean...

I'm sure she does,

but without actually knocking
on the door and asking,

I can't be 100%.

I've never met her.

Yet.

Ever.

So...

...that's why you came out here.

And that's why I was about to fly home,

because I realised it was all
a big mistake coming here, yeah?

And then my boss called
and "asked me" to stick around

and help with your investigation.

Look, I'm sorry, yeah?

I'm sorry if I scared that woman,

but right now I'd rather put
this behind us so I can get on

with the job of catching your k*ller,

and then I can get the hell out of here.

I'm going to walk back to
the hotel, yeah?

Thank you.

SNORlNG

Tyrus, please!

RADIO: Good morning to you.
It's a beautiful Christmas Eve here

on Saint Marie, and I hope
you're all feeling excited

and looking forward
to the big day tomorrow.

Yeah, like a hole in the head!

TYRUS SNORES

Morning, Mrs Hammond.

Hi. Just to let you know
I'll be checking out

this morning unexpectedly.
I see.

I've got to fly back to the UK today.

OK, madam. Work reasons.

Morning, Inspector.

Oh, wow.

That's a...

...big breakfast you've got there.

So that was, ah, funny,
yesterday evening.

Everyone thinking you were the k*ller.

Funny?

Well, I mean, not funny
ha-ha exactly, but, um...

...funny.

Unexpected.

Right.

The Commissioner said that
there had been some mix-up

but it's all sorted now?

Pretty much.

Strange, though, isn't it,

why she thought you were the k*ller?

So, look, a new lead has come in.

A publisher in the UK has been
in contact.

Apparently Tony Hurst was
writing his memoir.

They asked us to email over
the latest draft,

said it was saved on his laptop.

Only, when I checked the crime scene
log Officer Curtis made,

there's no laptop on it.

See?

You think his laptop was stolen?

Oh, we're leaving?

But you haven't even finished
your breakfast. Sir...

SHE SIGHS
Off we go again.

So I went back to Tony Hurst's
villa, dusted the desktop

and surrounding area for fingerprints.

And did you find anything?

Karla Hammond, shoplifting charge
back in the UK in her teens.

And who's she?

She's a successful businesswoman,
runs an online luxury

design company, but it's who
she was that's of more interest.



Karla Hammond recorded
A Christmas Paradise.

She sang that?

Mm-hm, and a few days ago
she arrived on this island.

Karla Hammond?

Dl Wilson, DS Thomas.

We'd like to have a little chat.

And we'd also like to take
a look into those suitcases.

Well...

...it's definitely his.

So at the very least
we're looking at theft.

Do you want to tell us what
you're doing in possession of

Tony Hurst's laptop, Miss Hammond?

Karla, we know about the memoir
Mr Hurst was writing,

which I'm assuming you must get
a mention or two in.

You look very different these days.

I mean, to how you liked
when the song came out.

Unrecognisable.

It was 40 years ago, Inspector.

Yeah, yeah, I know that,
but it's more than that.

It's more than just age.

I liked at the website
for your business.

Impressive.

But there isn't one mention of
who you used to be, you know,

your past celebrity.

In fact, I'd go as far as to say
you tried very hard to pretend

it never happened.

Which makes me wonder if
there's something in that memoir

you didn't want coming out.

And what might that be, exactly?

That it wasn't me that sang
the vocal on A Christmas Paradise,

that a session singer recorded the song

and I was just the pretty face
that mimed along.

And by that look on your face,

I'm guessing he wasn't making that up.

I was a model back in 1984,

and the real singer, they paid
her off because she didn't have

the looks - Tony's words, not mine -
and I was offered

the opportunity instead.

So why reveal it now?

Well, despite appearances,
Tony was in need of money.

His royalties didn't bring in
what they used to,

so he did a deal on his memoir.

The publishers wanted all
the juicy secrets.

So you flew out here to convince him
not to go through with it?

There's nothing I can do about it.

The publishers have got it.

Please, Tony, I'm begging you.

And you're right.

The last thing I need is to be
thrust into the spotlight after all

these years, press at my door,
photo in the news,

outing me as a liar.

I don't need to be made a fool of,
Inspector.

"The ditsy model who mimed along
to a pop song."

Well, obviously I'm not her any more.

So how did you get hold of
his laptop, then?

That night, I admit,
I went to see Tony again.

Tony, I am not going to
take no for an...

But when I got to his villa,
he was already dead.

And I realised nobody else knew
I was here on the island,

and if I took the only
copy of the memoir

no-one would ever know where it went.

And your secret would be safe.

Darlene, we're emailing over
a copy of Tony Hurst's memoir.

We need you to tell us exactly
what it says about Karla Hammond.

Doing it right now, honey.

See you soon.

PHONE VIBRATES

SHE SIGHS
Oh, what does he want now?

Dwayne, is everything all right?

Yes, Darlene.

I'm just having some tinned soup.

And you called me to tell me that?

Honestly, honey, I am in the middle
of a m*rder investigation here.

OK, look, I was asking after my father.

How's he doing?

He's at my auntie's right now.

But why don't you just give him
a call?

I'm sure he's missing you.

Is everything OK?

Everything's just great, Dwayne.

Darlene's family are really
looking after me!

Oh, lucky you.

That's good of you, Tanisha.

It's very noisy there.

Is that a party going on?

I guess you could call it
a kind of party, I mean,

not a big one.
Let's start now.

Be right with you.

Look, I'd better go, son.

Sounds like my barbecued lobster...

...is ready.

Lobster?

Bye, Dwayne.

Lobster.

HORN BEEPS

Tyrus? Tyrus?

Oh, you legend.

Really appreciate you doing
this for me, man.

Me owe ya.

Hey! What in blazes is going
on here? Who's that?

Oh, just a friend of mine.

He getting me
some last-minute Christmas shopping.

A few presents me ask him to pick up.

And how did he know you was here?

Well, I might have
used your phone for calling

when you weren't looking.

And compromise your own safety?

Marcelts cool, man.

He na tell.

Who are these presents for?

No-one. Just gifts.

Show me.
No, it's personal. Tyrus!

BARKS

What kind of Christmas present is that?

It's for me daughter.

She really wanted a puppy.

I didn't know you had a daughter.

Well, now you do.

So how was you going to get them to her

if you're stuck out here with me, hmm?

You were going to make
a break for it, wasn't you?

Now I'm going to have to
confiscate the puppy.

No way, man!

Tyrus, I'm here to protect you,

and I can't do that
if you go off gallivanting.

QUlET CRYlNG

Now I've got to look after
the both of you, huh?

So, what have we got?

We've got three victims in Santa
Claus outfits, all of whom were

shot with the same g*n, at the same
time, in three different locations.

Stuart Fullwell was at his hotel.

g*nsh*t

Tony Hurst was at his villa.

Don't do this.

g*nsh*t

And Tyrus Demille was walking home.

g*nsh*t

So, questions... How?

How did our k*ller manage to fire
the same g*n in three

different locations at the exact
same time?

And what does our k*ller
have against people

dressed as Santa Claus?

I have another question.

Um... Why are we here?

And I don't mean in a
"what's the meaning of life?"

Kind of way, just,
why are we here, in the market,

and not at the police station?

That's usually where we do
this kind of thing.

Ah, yeah, right.

Um, I just prefer it here.

Right.

Yeah, reminds me
a bit of being back in London.

I find it easier to think
when there's busyness, you know,

people about, bustle, noise.

You're missing it there?

I'm looking forward to getting back,
put it that way.

So what's a Mervin Wilson Christmas
like back in London?

Nothing special, really.

Quiet.

Thought you didn't like quiet.

I work... over Christmas, usually.

I take the Christmas Day shift.

How come?

I live alone. So...

...yeah. What about you?

What does
a DS Thomas Christmas look like?

Well, if I can, I go back to
St Barnabas.

That's where I grew up.

Spend it with my family,
my uncle's family, um...

...nothing special, you know.

We spend the day cooking, talking.

That's what Christmas is about.

Spending time with
the people who love you.

Right?

Yeah. Yeah, I guess so.

So, what's he called, then?

Huh? Your puppy.

Er... Tyrus.

You named him after a fool?!

It's so she remembers me. Jasmine.

Me and her mother aren't together
any more, so she na see me as much.

That's why I got her all
those presents.

I just really wanted to make it
a special day, you know?

I'd made plans like that, myself.

Me and my father,
just the two of us.

Huh..

Well, I guess we're both missing out
this Christmas, stuck in here.

Everything all right?

Commissioner Patterson said you know
someone on this street.

It's not Dorna, is it?

Dorna Bray, yeah.

You know her?
I just came to visit her.

I'm sorry, but Dorna passed away.

A few months back, it was.

Are you a friend of hers?

Um... no, not-not really.

Thanks, anyway.

Sorry to disturb you.

Excuse me, I'll come back.

I have to take this.

Miss Clemetson, is everything all right?

PHONE BUZZES

Hey, how's the party going?

Oh, it's all right, you know.

Everyone is enjoying themselves.

Are you OK?

Don't forget,
if you're not feeling well,

take one of your tablets, you know.

No, I'm all right.

It's just, it's not the same, is it?

It's someone else's family.

At Christmas, anyway.

Tell me about it.

I know it wasn't what
we planned, you know.

But hey... maybe next year, huh?

Yeah. Maybe next year.

KNOCK ON DOOR

Commissioner.

May I come in?

Yeah, sure.

Excuse the, er, mess.

I think it's actually worse
on the inside than the outside.

Yeah.
Quite an achievement, right?

I didn't realise your mother
was Dorna Bray.

I - I didn't know her well, but...

...I'm so sorry.

Ah, don't worry about it.

It's all good.

I'm fine.

Really.

I mean, I didn't
actually know her, did I?

So, um, nothing has
changed as far as I'm concerned.

It's hard to know what to
do in such circumstances,

but I've always believed that
actions do speak louder than words.

Ah... I think we should move you
somewhere more comfortable.

All right, mate?
What's your name, then?

PHONE BUZZES

DS Thomas. What you got?

Merry Christmas, sir.

Oh.
Oh, yeah, I forgot about that.

Um, same to you.

Merry Christmas, Inspector.

Is this, um...

...just season's greetings,
or is this a work call?

You need to get over here, sir.
I've got a lead for you.

PHONE GOES DEAD

Sir? Sir, can you...?

I think he already hung up.

Dwayne. Oh. What you doing out here?

I...

I was just sitting here thinking.

Christmas is such a precious thing,
and I don't think me

and my father have many left.

His health, you know?

Sorry.

I'm worried this might be the last
Christmas Day we spend together.

Ah! He's on time.

Punctuality has never
been his strongest point.

What's... what's going on?

Tyrus, I want to spend
Christmas Day with my father,

and you want to spend it
with your daughter.

So we're going to make it happen.

What...?

You're...?
Yes.

♪ There is a winter wonderland

♪ And it's an island
in the sun... ♪

Ah, now that's what
I call a Merry Christmas!

Yes I!

Yes I!

Yes I!

♪ Giant celebration,
make the world better

♪ Light of my life, make my
tropical dream come true

♪ Christmas paradise in the sun

♪ What you saying? Come again?

♪ She's my Christmas paradise,
my sugar and spice... ♪

DARLENE SlNGS ALONG

So I've been speaking with
Tony Hurst's record company,

and Kenny Simmons sampled the chorus
from A Christmas Paradise

and used it in a track
he released on social media.

Six million likes.

It was going to be a big
hit for Kenny.

Going to be?

Well, Kenny initially released
the track without ever seeking

Tony Hurst's permission to
use the sample.

When the song started getting
some attention,

the record company became aware.

And Tony Hurst refused to grant it,
right?

Unless it was for the right fee,
which Kenny couldn't afford.

And now Tony Hurst is dead.

According to Kenny's lawyers,

the record company are keen to get
the process moving again.

I'll bet they are.

Do we really have to do this now?

It's Christmas Day.

There's children in there
waiting for their presents.

And how thrilled will their parents
be if they find out

the police let an unknown k*ller
play Santa's little helper?

I didn't k*ll anyone.

But you have benefited from
Tony Hurst's death, haven't you?

Your song.

Tony Hurst ruined any
chance of it being released.

But that's all changed now, hasn't it?

Now he's no longer with us.

Well, nothing's been signed, all right?

These things are complicated.

Well, not in your case, they're not.

You see, we've spoken
to the record company,

and we know they're keen,
and you're definitely keen.

So let's skip the modesty, yeah?

Cos you're about to become
seriously minted, right?

I could do all right for myself.

Give me what I've always
wanted - a singing career.

Make something of my life.

Leave all this behind, yeah?

I guess.

Look, you can
deny actually murdering Mr Hurst,

because of course you would,

but don't tell me his death isn't
something you desired.

Because it's about to
change your whole life.

I didn't k*ll him.

I have to get back to work.

Inspector, I found something
in Tony Hurst's memoir.

It's to do with Jamie Barton.

Just got to nip out for a bit, bud, OK?

But you said you would play.

Yeah, I will, as soon
as I get back, all right?

I promise.

I won't be long.

This can't be a coincidence,
that he's here on the island

and never even mentioned it to us.

HE CLICKS BUTTON REPEATEDLY

Sir, that's not going to make it
come any quicker.

CHlLD: Who is it?

Ollie, it's the police.

Do you remember me
from the other day? DS Thomas.

Happy Christmas.

Did Santa bring you that?

You look like a real sheriff now.

Do you want to get to the point?

With respect, Inspector,
maybe just zip it right now.

So, er, is your dad not here?

He's downstairs.

OK.

Um, why don't you guys go and look
if you can find Mr Barton

and I'll stay here with Ollie?

Please don't do that, Mr Barton!
Put the g*n down.

I wasn't going to, I swear.
I'm not going to hurt you.

That's not who I am.

Then put it dawn.

Now step away.

This isn't what you think.
I know it looks bad now, but...

We know about your mum, Mr Barton.

She sang that famous song that
Tony Hurst wrote.

Are you telling me it's pure chance
that you're here on this island

and he's been shot?

And now we find a g*n.

Is that what you're telling me?

I just wanted money, that's all,
what she's owed.

He made a fortune off that song
and she got nothing.

The only reason
I came here was for the money.

All Mum wanted was to sing.

That was her dream.

And when her big chance came along,
he goes and steals it from her.

It's because of him,

it's because of what he did that she
started drinking, and now she's ill.

And she needs help
and I can't afford it.

But he can.

PHONE BUZZES

Yeah, what you got?

Apparently Jamie has a g*n.

Did Ollie tell you that?

He found it the night of the m*rder.

Thought it was a toy, only...

...he said he was playing cowboys
with Mr Fullwell that night,

and that he pretended to sh**t him
with it.

♪ My Christmas paradise, oh-oh... ♪

Bang - bang!

Hey, you can't sh**t Father Christmas!

I'll put you on the naughty list.

OK.
Thank you.

What's going on?

Ollie said he found your g*n,
the same night Mr Fullwell was shot.

Mr Barton, your kid is now involved.

Do you understand?
That's where we are now.

So, the truth, please.

Now.

Ol, he knew what
he was getting for Christmas.

It's a cowboy set, you know, toy g*ns.

He went looking and he found it and...

...and...

So you're saying that it
was Ollie that... No.

No, no, no, no. I swear that's
not what happened.

No.
What then?

Stuart.

He saw Ollie with the g*n
and he realised it wasn't a toy.

Wait a minute, let me see that.

So if Mr Fullwell threatened to go
to the police,

that gives you motive.
No, I would never do that.

I would never do that.

We know you've got motive to
k*ll Tony Hurst.

I told you, I just wanted to scare him.

I just wanted to pressure him
into giving my mum what he owes her.

I didn't want to k*ll him.
I didn't want to k*ll him.

Inspector...

I think he might be telling the truth.

What?

This g*n - it didn't fire the shot
recovered from Tony Hurst's

body, or Stuart Fullwell's.

Sorry, what?

I measured the barrel of the g*n, sir.

It's not a match for any
of the b*ll*ts that we found.

It's a different calibre.

He is not the k*ller.

He's not the k*ller.

At every single turn, with every
piece of evidence we uncover,

it makes less and less sense.

It's so damn quiet here.

I mean, look,
there's literally no-one around.

Well, it is Christmas Day, sir.

And do you have to keep criticising
every single thing about

this island?

Because when you do it's very hard
for us not to take it personally.

Pull over.

What?

Pull over. Now!

Basketball.

FYI, it isn't personal.

All right?
And I'm sorry you felt that.

It wasn't intended.

Cos, for the record, the only
thing that's made it vaguely

bearable, the last few days,
is the fact that you

and Officer Curtis do actually
seem to know what you're doing.

Anyway, as I was saying, basketball.

But why are you going to the...?

Really wish he'd stop doing that.

No, the boy's mother is already
on a flight over.

We just need some care for him
temporarily.

He's in the hotel
creche at the moment.

Yes. Thank you. Bye.

Inspector Wilson?

No idea.

He and DS Thomas should have been
back a while ago.

PHONE RINGS

Where are you both? Sorry?

Where?

What's going on?

I wish I knew, sir.

He just stood there staring for a while,

then moved around
the court a bit, and now...

He's not very good, is he?

Commissioner.

Inspector.

Is it normal for you to play
basketball in the midst

of a m*rder case?

I've never played before in my life,
to be honest with you.

Probably explains why
I keep missing, right?

That doesn't answer my question.

Visualisation.

Um, three victims, one g*n.

Three hoops, one ball.

How can I sh**t three hoops with one
ball at the exact same time?

You can't.
Exactly.

Inspector.

This case is proving to be...

How?

...increasingly challenging.

I know, right?

I came here because I've been
in contact with the team in London,

and they have a detective ready to
fly over here this evening.

What? Why?

To take over the case.

Why would they do that?

In light of your personal
circumstances,

I feel I have a duty of care.

And considering all you've been
through in the last few days,

perhaps you are not the best
person to be leading such

a demanding investigation.

Maybe it was just not meant to be.

I swear, I'm not going to hurt you.
That's not who I am.

Half past nine, he headed back
to his bedroom to get changed.

I measured the barrel of the g*n,
sir.

It's a different calibre.

Inspector?

Maybe it wasn't meant to be.

And if it wasn't meant to be,
then what was?

And-and when?

OK.

Yes!
Victim number one.

I have no idea what's
going on right now.

And judging by the Commissioner's
face, he doesn't either.

But something tells me HE does.

I need the other ball.

Come on!

It wasn't meant to be.

Your words.

And that's the point, isn't it?

Yeah, because if things don't go
the way you expect it to,

then all you can do is play
the hand you're dealt.

And that's what our k*ller did.

Victim number two.

When I say sh**t,
I want you to sh**t.

Yeah? Please, sir.

Victim number three.

Ready?

sh**t!

That's how!

That means the sh**ting must have
happened about 10:15.





All three victims were shot
by the same g*n, at the same time,

in three separate locations.

That's exactly how.

It is NOT impossible.

You know how it was done?

I know how it ALL was done.

But, um, Officer Curtis, I need you
to do something for me first.

Um, Jamie Barton's g*n - I need you
to check it for fingerprints,

because I don't think it's
Jamie's g*n.

Sure, Inspector.

If I'm right, and I think I am, then
we should go and make an arrest.

Uh-uh-uh, actually, Inspector,

we tend to do things a little
differently here.

Sorry? What do you mean?

Why can't I just write it
up in the case file?

I mean, that is
standard procedure, right?

Let's say it's a matter of tradition.

If you would?

Ahem.

I assume you're all wondering why
you're gathered here like this.

I'm wondering the same thing myself,
to be honest.

But as this case has confounded us
at every turn,

I suppose one last surprise
shouldn't be too unexpected.

And you know what?

In a funny way,
that's what this has all been about.

Expectation.

What we think is going to happen,
and what does.

I mean, take me, for instance.

A few days ago, here I was on this
island, a mere tourist.

And yet now, I'm heading up
one of the most puzzling m*rder

cases I've ever encountered.

Didn't see that one coming a mile off.

But then, as I said to
Commissioner Patterson,

we play the hand we're dealt,

and that's the key to understanding
this case, because as planned as

it may seem - three victims in Santa
Claus outfits, all of whom were

shot at the exact same time in three
different locations with just

one g*n - as contrived as it may appear

none of it was meant to happen.

Let's go back to the evening
it all started.

At 9:30, Stuart Fullwell headed
back to his hotel...

Stuart Fullwell headed back
to his hotel to get changed

out of his Santa Claus outfit.

And on the way he comes
across a little boy, your son Ollie,

out playing cowboys near the beach.

And when Stuart notices the g*n that
little Ollie was playing with

was real...

...he becomes concerned.

Now, that g*n, let's call it g*n A.

That wasn't the g*n we found you
with earlier this morning,

was it, Mr Barton?

Despite you leading us to think it was,

it was a different g*n, you acquired
to thr*aten Tony Hurst.

And when Stuart confronted
you about seeing little

Ollie in possession of it, I think
you sent Ollie back

to your hotel room, and the two
of you went somewhere quiet to talk.

I'm taking this to the police.

No, please, I'll be arrested.
No, you can't.

I don't believe you
intended to sh**t Stuart.

Like you said, you're not a k*ller.

It's just not in you.

But I think you tried to get
the g*n off him.

You can't - you can't do this.

Just, please...
g*nsh*t

In that tussle, the g*n went off.

I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry.

So it was an accident?

But the other two sh**t were not.

And now we know there was a second
g*n involved, it's not too

much of a leap to work out there was
a second person involved.

Isn't that right, Kenny Simmons?

Sorry?

We know you had very good
reason for wanting Tony Hurst dead.

With him out of the way, his record
company would let you release

your song, which was guaranteed to
make you a small fortune.

And Stuart Fullwell's death
provided some useful

misdirection for Tony Hurst's m*rder.

I didn't do anything.

Yes, you did, Kenny.

We found your fingerprints on the
g*n we recovered from Mr Barton

this morning, so we have evidence
you were involved.

And assuming Mr Barton here wants to
receive the smallest sentence

he can get, I don't think he's
going to take the rap for all this.

Are you, Mr Barton?
No.

No.

So... here's what happened.

I think Kenny witnessed what took
place on the beach that night...

...when the g*n went off accidentally.

g*nsh*t

And in that moment, his plan
began to form.

I didn't mean to.

I know what to do.

A plan to make three different
sh**t look like they all

happened at the same time.

We know that Stuart Fullwell left
the bar at 9:30 and,

it turns out, was shot not long after.

Not at 10:15.

But Ollie said that he came straight
down to reception after it happened.

He lied.

He simply waited
and went down to reception later.

Why? Because that's what his dad
told him to do.

I think there's a dead man,
on the beach.

And who would disbelieve
a seven-year-old kid?

We certainly didn't.

In fact, all throughout the case,
we took little Ollie at his word,

working on the basis that the first
"m*rder" happened at 10:15.

Which brings us to the second sh**ting,

which did happen at that time - 10:15.

g*nsh*t

It was Kenny who took that same g*n
that accidentally k*lled

Stuart Fullwell, g*n A,
and used it to sh**t Tony Hurst.

I assume, having used his track on
your own song, done your research,

you already knew that Tony kept
the costume he wore 40 years ago.

Get inside.

It wasn't vital to the plan, but it
added another layer of mystery

that would add to our confusion.

And so while it was being
recorded on camera...

Don't do this. I'm begging you.

You don't have to do this.
Just tell me what it is you want.

We can work something out.

g*nsh*t

Which leaves us our third
and final victim - Tyrus Demille.

The solution to which can be
found in the fact that there was a

second, different g*n at play - g*n B,

if you will - which
I believe belongs to you, Kenny.

And so, while you were about to m*rder

Tony Hurst on the dot of 10:15,
you told Jamie to follow Tyrus as

he headed home, and at that exact
same time, at 10:15, fire off a

few rounds in his general direction
with g*n B, but without k*lling him.

Somebody there?

g*nsh*t

g*nsh*t

I believe, Jamie, once Tyrus had fled,

you recovered the three b*ll*ts
you'd fired from g*n B, and on

the way back from Tony Hurst's
villa, you released three rounds

from g*n A into the same place,
so that when we found them,

they would be a match for the

b*ll*ts fired into
the first two victims.

I assume you agreed not to talk or
interact with each other

when it was done,
so as not to raise any suspicion.

But it did mean you were each left
with the other's g*n,

and that's why we found you still
in possession of it, Mr Barton,

waiting to return it to Mr Simmons.

But why sh**t another person?

To confuse us, the police, with
none of the victims or the suspects

having any apparent connection
to Tyrus Demille.

That was the whole point, wasn't it?

None of it was meant to make any
sense at any point at all.

You just wanted to send us
on a merry dance,

going round in round in circles
endlessly.

An unsolvable case.

And you know what?

I'll admit it, it almost,
very nearly, had me beat.

Well and truly.

Then I guess it was worth a try.

You can make your arrest.

He is annoying, but he's good, eh?

You do not have to say anything...

Well done, Inspector.
And - thank you.

Sure... you later rely on in court.

Is something the matter?

Well, I just don't see why that was
entirely necessary.

I'd prefer to just write it
up in the case report.

We do that here as well.

Well, each to his own, I suppose.

Officer Curtis, would you be
so good as to let Officer Myers

and Tyrus Demille know
they are free to go?

OK, sir. Come on.

Thanks for what you did today.

You made me daughter's Christmas.

No, you did, with a little
bit of help from the puppy!

Go on.

Listen,
if the radio is still not working,

tell your auntie to bring
it down the harbour.

I'll sort it.

No receipt required.

I'll believe it when I see it.

Now go and spend some time
with your daughter.

Yes I.

Driver. Allez.

How'd it go? Anything to report?

Nope.

Cool as ice.

Just like me.

So, here's a funny thing.

There I was with the Inspector
earlier today,

on the hotel beach, dealing with
quite an intense situation.

Oh? I measured the
barrel of the g*n, sir.

It's a different calibre.

And what do you think I see?

I don't know, Darlene,
what did you see?

Three men on a boat...

...who all looked very familiar to
me.

One of them looked like your father.

One of them looked a bit like Tyrus.

And one of them... looked like you,
Dwayne Myers.

So much so that
I almost thought it was you.

But then I remembered, you were
locked away in the safehouse, so...

...it can't have been.

That's the strangest thing I've
ever heard in my life.

In fact, it's almost
impossible to believe!

SHE SUCKS HER TEETH

Huh!

♪ You can take a boy from the
country... ♪

Inspector.

Commissioner.

Just thought I'd pop by.

Wanted to make sure you're
positive you won't join us

for Christmas dinner.

Er, yeah, I'm positive.

I mean, thanks again, but
I need to finish this case report.

Sooner it's done,
sooner I'm out of here, right? What?

Just to say there is no great
rush for you to leave.

Meaning?

We are still in need
of a permanent DI here.

Me? You're joking.

Right?

No.

No.

Right, well, I'm surprised you
think that's a good idea,

to be honest with you.

I thought you might be, but I think
you might make a good fit here.

It's like you don't know me at all.

I know you feel this island doesn't
offer as much as it did

when you arrived.

But is that a reason to leave?

Perhaps by getting to know
Saint Marie, the island where

your mother spent her life, you
might get to know a little of her?

OK, look, um...

I'm flattered and everything,
but it's just not an option.

I just want to get back to London, ASAP.

I understand, Inspector.

Merry Christmas.

And to you, sir.

So what do you reckon?
Get back out...

...to sea tomorrow, catch ourselves
a few snapper?

Sounds like a good plan to me.

Oh, and just to let you know, we are
going to be having quite

a few more days like that
ahead of us in the future.

Oh? Mm.

I've already told the Commissioner.

I've officially told him that
I'm going to be handing my badge in.

Yeah. I've just realised that there
are far more important things

I need to be doing in my life right now.

Sounds like a good plan to me.

Mm.
Come on, they're waiting.

Oh, here they come.

Just... in time.

Thank you. So, where's
this new detective?

Mervin declined the
offer of Christmas dinner.

Oh, really?

Yeah, he's... he's a bit like that.

Rude!

He just likes to do his own thing.

A little bird tells me
that you're hanging up your uniform,

to spend more time with your father.

Mm.

Well, I couldn't do both things.

You know, I never thought I'd
actually say this,

but.. You are a good man, Dwayne Myers.

So does this mean that we, um...?

Absolutely not.

Merry Christmas, Darlene.

Shall we?

I think that's everyone.

We can't thank you
enough for doing this.

And the best is still to come.

I've made a special rum cake for
dessert,

and I'm going to flambé it!

I think a toast is in order.

Merry Christmas to all of you.

ALL: Merry Christmas!

So, what's it been like working
with the new boy?

Well, he's, um...

Yeah, definitely very...

English?
Well, that's...

...one way of putting it. Hmm.

They're all the same, you know.

That's the truth.

THEY CHUCKLE

Selwyn...

...always so inscrutable.

I don't know what you mean.

ENGINE STARTS

CARlBBEAN MUSIC ON RADIO

♪ There's a winter wonderland
and it's an island in the sun

♪ When we walk out together, warm up
the weather

♪ When we walk out together, warm up
the weather

♪ Giant celebration, make the world
better

♪ Light of my life, make my tropical
dream come true

♪ Christmas paradise in the sun

♪ What you saying?
Come again? ♪