[suspenseful music]
[thunder rumbling]
[church bells tolling]
[music continues]
[laughing]
I thought the coppers
almost at me that time.
[panting]
[exclaims]
[laughing]
[sniffs] Oh!
Do say cheers
to St. Peter for me, Mary Kelly.
-Here.
-[male voice] Jack!
Hello.
Anyone here?
[male voice]
Jack!
Richard?
[suspenseful music]
Blimey! Is that you?
Oh, it's okay, mate.
I lost the coppers.
-What are you doing?
I said I lost them.
-[police siren wailing]
[pounding on door]
[cop]
Hey, you.
Caught.
Caught like a rat in a trap.
[pounding on door continues]
What are you doing?
Stop!
[groans]
[music increases]
[door opens]
[Lily]
Oh.
Did you see
what that woman was wearing?
-[scoffs]
-Is that how the puritans
really dressed?
[Gerald]
Uh... I don't think
the puritans wear
their dresses that low cut,
-at least not without
a scarlet aye.
-Yeah.
And I love this old house.
It just screams "scream."
Just like the doorbell.
Um, anyway,
this is the master library
in all its, uh, booky splendor.
Is this where you want me
to set up?
In the library?
[Gerald]
Well, it's where we found him.
And he liked to be called Jack.
Is that because he claimed
to be Jack the Ripper?
-Oh, he was Jack the Ripper.
He channeled the original.
-Yep.
How could you tell? [strains]
-He started
carrying around a Kn*fe...
-Jesus!
-...and memorizing 900 numbers.
-[grunts]
-You brought the real one.
-Yeah. [chuckles]
He was re-enacting
the five canonical murders.
If he had time,
the Putnam murders.
But they never found
any evidence.
Remember that.
Only because
he was extremely clever.
Well, he was also very psychic.
You know, it helps to know
what the police
are gonna do next.
This is true.
But bad people
don't get to stick around.
They go somewhere.
I never did understand all this.
What? Yeah...
Uh, good people after death,
sometimes hang around
their loved ones or a place,
especially if they have
unfinished business
or regrets about passing.
And what happens
with the bad spirits?
Oh, well... [chuckles]
Oh, jeez!
And...
...what's the determining
factor? I mean...
...it's not, uh,
fudging on your taxes?
I never could prove up
my dependence.
Man, you're single.
That's why
I could never prove 'em up.
The dividing line is souls
that would torment the living.
That fits Jack.
Well, allegedly.
But hey, if he's found a way
to stick around,
then maybe he was innocent.
Habeas no corpus.
[sighs] All right,
I guess we do need to find out
what happened to him.
[sighs] If my uncle
is channeling Jack the Ripper,
their spirits gonna become
twisted together,
mix into one soul
so they can't be separated.
Oh. That's awful.
Channeling can be risky
if the spirit's malignant.
Maybe we should rethink this.
Um, the important thing
is to figure out what happened.
But why did we have
to sneak in the backway?
[laughs, sighs]
Uh, we're under
strict instructions
not to let anyone disturb
the Halloween party.
But I want to see the ballroom.
[clicks tongue] Yeah,
that would be against the rules.
You have to be an Auldcraft
in order to attend an Auldcraft
Hallowed Eve's ball.
-Why can't I go as Seymour's
date? He's an Auldcraft.
-Um...
-I took my name
off the attendee list years ago.
-Yeah.
Not even girlfriends
or significant others.
You don't have any caterers?
Well, they come in early
and set up.
People to clean up?
They'll come in tomorrow.
And all the curtains are drawn,
before you ask.
And we would check IDs
at the gate
if we didn't know
everyone already.
-Um.
-You really think of everything.
I am the estate manager.
Can't I just take a peek?
Uh, n-- I'm sorry.
It is a private party
for family only.
And I am not family. I get it.
Hey, that doesn't mean
you can't have
a world-famous
Auldcraft Hallowtini.
What's a Hallowtini?
Well, it may be eye of newt,
unicorn horn powder,
and boiled frog.
Delicious.
Or it may be vodka,
powdered sugar,
and green food coloring.
You decide.
-One for you?
-Nah, thank you.
I don't drink
while conducting séances.
Oh, I get it.
Don't drink and drive.
[chuckles]
Lily, it's just a stupid party
everybody goes to.
-A party that we have
to be married to attend.
-Yeah, but...
-And you don't believe
in marriage.
-[sighs]
-I believe that's come up
over brunch.
-But...
Yeah, but,
but we've talked about this.
I mean, we're still young.
Let's talk about it again.
But what's wrong
with keeping our relationship
the way it is? We're just fine.
So I can continue to endure
the frantic calls from my mother
-and the smirks from
my blissfully married sister.
-Lily?
[sighs] My point is,
I'll survive missing a party.
-Even a famously spooky one.
-[both chuckle]
At least there won't be
any ghost attending,
right? [chuckles]
I mean, it's like that time
we actually saw Bigfoot.
That was moss on a tree.
It was very scary moss.
We shouldn't finish setting up.
So what are we using tonight?
Uh, tonight is all me.
But the show?
[scoffs] You don't need
any gimmicks.
Well, people are so disappointed
without the cheesy
special effects.
-What's the first rule?
-The second rule is to get them
to text all their friends.
Um, yeah,
but what's the first rule?
-Never use more special effects
than people need to believe.
-Exactly.
And these people
believe already.
-Well, that's not surprising,
considering where we are.
-True.
-But I bought new gear.
-[sighs]
Mm, you wasted your money.
Come on, Mr. Auldcraft.
Don't you want to show them
how we...
-[mischievous music]
-...play with fire?
-How did you do that?
-You like?
-Yeah, I like.
-It's a shame
we aren't using any tricks.
All right, fine.
We'll use that one.
-I like that one.
-Yay.
But don't use that tonight.
Oh, come on,
just let me do a quick reading.
Aren't you curious?
I bet this place
registers a two.
[beeping]
Oh, see? I told you, a two.
[beeping continues]
No! A two and a half. Wow!
The famously haunted
Auldcraft Mansion
lives up to its reputation.
[beeping continues]
We should really finish
setting up.
Remember that time that
we visited Dunridge Sanatorium,
and I got a reading of four?
[beeping continues]
Well, the spectrograph
is reading eight.
[beeping intensifies]
A-- A ten.
-What? [gasps]
-[electricity crackles]
[tense music]
What is this place?
It's weird. That's weird.
That shouldn't happen.
Oh, but-- I got a reading of 12.
I mean, I wouldn't expect
that high of a reading
in purgatory.
It's probably just
a surge in the battery.
Those old models, it happens.
[Gerald]
I'm back.
And I got 'em
to give you
extra unicorn horn powder,
mummy dust, and a gummy maggot.
-Uh...
-Whoa!
You looked like you need it.
What happened?
I-- Uh, it's, it's nothing.
Equipment problems.
Thanks for the drink.
-[glasses clink]
-[sighs]
Can you, um,
turn down that drink?
I have to concentrate.
Hey, look, don't be grumpy
just because you can't drink.
This is your element, right?
[sighs] I mean, yeah,
but we still don't know
the details.
How did Jack die?
Um... All right, we...
...found his body right here...
...with his Kn*fe in his chest.
Someone m*rder*d him
in this room?
Well, couldn't have.
There was no one in the house
that whole weekend.
Oh, then he fell
on his own Kn*fe?
[sighs]
Weird, huh?
Uh...
That's why we need a seer
to help us figure out
the details.
And who better than my nephew?
[loud music and people murmuring
in background]
[sighs] Wow.
Party's turning up.
It sounds like
the "Monster Mash"
being played on a Victrola.
They will dance to it
until dawn.
-Wow!
-And yeah, your, uh...
Julia asked about
whether you'd be coming tonight.
Oh! What did you tell her?
Told her you'd be busy as usual.
Uh, who's Julia?
Mm, nobody in particular.
[party music continues
in background]
Gerald?
[clears throat] Um...
-She's...
-Yes. Who?
Uh, you know...
...Seymour, it was
a really fantastic idea
to bring Lily here tonight.
I mean, there's absolutely
no possibility
-of a complete disaster.
-All right, f--
Let's proceed with the séance
as quickly as possible.
-What-- We're not all here.
-[knocking on door]
S-- Someone else is joining us?
Well, commandeering
is more like it.
You, you promised me.
[sighs] Yes, I promised you.
[sighs] Okay.
Just remember
whatever happens after this...
...wasn't my idea.
Oh, come on.
[sighs]
Oh, but-- Oh, okay.
-I wasn't finished.
-[glasses clinking]
[clears throat]
They're here.
-[whooshing]
-[mischievous music]
[laughs]
I have materialized. [laughs]
Oh. This female is a mistake,
Seymour Edwin Auldcraft.
All right, buddy, I don't want
you in my personal life.
Or I'm walking out that door.
You would do well
to show more respect
for the head of your family.
Or what? If this was a donks,
I think I'd miss.
Oh, you conceited,
young popinjay.
[whooshing]
Now, Richard, compose yourself.
No one who is not in the family
should be in the manor tonight.
[mumbles] She is my family.
Oh, don't be ridiculous.
You haven't married her.
-Oh--
-So it would be wonderful
if you did.
What if she discovered
our secret, hmm?
She could break over 200 years
of tradition.
Look, she's been told
not to leave this room, okay?
Hey, I promise
not to see anything tonight.
Delightful.
The unenforceable promise
of a femme seule.
-A what?
-A woman alone.
You sound like my mother.
Let's all calm down.
Uh, perhaps if I prepare
some tea.
Oh, lemon curd
and clotted cream.
I am in heaven.
Not yet, dear.
Why are you two even here?
I don t need any help
conducting this séance.
[Richard]
Of course you do.
Every conductor
needs his symphonic orchestra.
-[Seymour] But--
-Don't worry, Mr. Auldcraft.
Seymour will do great.
Because he's got spirit.
Yes, he does.
He's got spirit and my love.
♪ Ba-da-ba ♪
I see why a wedding
is out of the question.
-Shut up.
-Uh.
Now, Richard,
let me see if I understand.
Seymour, dear...
...you can't perform your séance
without your little friend?
That's right.
And we need a séance.
One with Seymour's
particular set of skills?
Regrettably so.
Then we must proceed. Correct?
We might as well
be pleasant to each other.
Hey, I am being pleasant.
I do not like being forced
to be pleasant under duress.
Boys...
[tense music]
Fine.
Acceptable.
Wonderful. Wonderful.
Now, I believe
it would be proper
for me to introduce myself
to our guest.
Good evening,
I'm Victoria Fidelia Auldcraft.
Lily Herdston.
Pleased to meet you.
Pleasure to meet you, dear.
[gentle music]
My visiting card.
Oh! I'll Facebook you.
Yes?
Well, dear,
if you like to face books,
the library
is a perfect place to be.
No, Mrs. Auldcraft. I meant--
Oh, no, please call me
by my Christian name.
Victoria. I was named
after the British Queen,
of course.
I could have sworn
the Queen was named after you.
I trust the family history
has been explained to you.
Uh, no, not really.
Um... [clears throat]
They like to dress up
in fancy past duds.
It reminds them
of the good old days.
That's a bit simplistic,
but, but true.
And did you explain
our illustrious family history?
Why we enjoy our duds?
Right. Yeah. So, um,
this place is old, right?
So a whole bunch of people
have d*ed here over the years,
a whole lot.
No, that won't do
in the slightest.
Many wonderful people
have lived,
and yes, d*ed here.
Generals, governors,
captains of industry.
The history
of the Auldcraft family
is the history of great men,
-like our founder.
-[laughs] A distinctly
dashing fellow
who laid the cornerstone
to this house in 1786.
[scoffs] He laid it crooked.
-He laid it perfectly.
-No, he didn't.
Balls were held here,
the Civil w*r planned,
fortunes were made, and,
and squandered and amplified.
Throughout the eras,
the Auldcraft family
has maintained
the highest standards
of civilized living.
Not to mention civilized deaths.
Today, the Auldcraft family
continues its march proudly
to the present.
And now we proudly proceed
to our present business
-contacting Jack.
-Oh!
I refused to refer
to Jonathan Theodore as Jack.
Call him what you like,
but we must call him.
Oh, I understand.
How do we proceed,
Seymour, dear?
Well, everybody gather
around the table.
[clock bell ringing]
[clearing throat]
[magic chime]
[Lily]
Did you see that?
Did you see that?
Can we get on with it?
Ah! Yes.
Wow, no wonder this place rates
at 12 on the spectrograph.
All right.
Everyone, take a deep breath
and focus your thoughts.
[exhales]
So romantic.
-Oh, self-igniting candles.
-Oh, check that out.
-[Richard] How quaint.
-[Victoria laughs]
-I can't believe
it actually worked. [chuckles]
-All right--
Do you have this, uh, patented?
No more talking, guys.
We gotta-- I gotta concentrate.
[exhales sharply]
Close your eyes.
Focus on summing Jack.
Envision him.
Form his image in your mind.
Lily?
Spirits of the night,
spirits that avoid the light,
speak to us.
Uh, nothing's happening.
Contacting the spirit world
isn't like using a cell phone.
Okay? It takes time.
There's not an app for this?
No more commentary, okay?
I have to concentrate.
I'm sorting the dead here, okay?
[exhales]
Spirits, Seymour Auldcraft
is calling to you.
Open the door
and pass on through.
Perhaps another nursery rhyme
to try.
Richard, be polite.
Spirits,
Seymour Auldcraft
is calling to you.
-Open the door
and pass on through.
-Focus.
[tense mischievous music]
I smell perfume.
Hmm.
[gasps as Beatrice]
Oh!
Hello, everybody.
That's not Jack.
Gerald...
...don't you recognize me?
Um, Seymour Afterdark?
Young lady,
leave that body immediately.
-You're tying up the line.
-[Gerald] No, wait.
Beatrice?
-Is that you?
-Gerald, yes.
Oh! I have been waiting ages
to see you again, dear.
-Who is Beatrice?
-Gerald's fiancé. Deceased.
They met in amateur theatricals
playing Romeo and Juliet.
She crashed her car
into the cemetery
-on the night they were engaged.
-Mm.
Too many Hallowtinis.
Um, Beatrice, why haven't you
passed on through to the light?
Because I had to warn you.
Warn me about what? Jack?
Yes.
Something is anchoring him
to this house.
Something evil.
You must destroy it, Gerald.
[stutters] Enough of this.
-Uh, be gone, you interloper.
-[Gerald] No.
Not yet. [stutters]
Stay a little longer.
What am I supposed to do?
I can't hurt Seymour.
I have to go.
[sighs] Goodbye, Gerald.
Beatrice?
Seymour, wha-- what's going on?
My spirit cannot leave this body
without a physical shock.
What sort of physical shock?
Well, I don't know exactly.
But the greater the shock,
the more likelihood
my spirit will be expelled.
Well, I-- I can't hurt Seymour.
Mm, you're going
to have to k*ll him.
-[gaps]
-[stutters]
-[Seymour as Beatrice] Or...
-Or?
...you could kiss me.
Kiss you?
In that body?
No way.
You loved me once.
[Gerald]
Oh, I, I still do.
I just can't.
Okay.
Then take my hand.
Oh. Sure. Okay.
Anything for you, Beatrice.
"For each pilgrim's hand
holds a saint's hand."
"And palm to palm
is holy palmers kiss."
[in normal voice]
Gerald, what--
what are you doing?
-[sighs]
-Patty Cake?
Seymour,
your parlor tricks
are not working.
You failed to channel Jack.
Look, I'm sorry.
Something's interfering
with the connection.
I, uh-- Whatever happened,
he's really stuck down there.
We need answers, not old lovers.
-Who?
-[Gerald] Um,
my old fiancé.
She smelled
just like Chanel No. 5.
She told us a physical shock
was necessary
to release her spirit.
That's true.
And the longer a spirit
stays inside a physical body...
...the more force it takes
to get it to leave.
So, channeling is dangerous.
-We can't leave
Jonathan Theodore...
-Uh, Jack.
...trapped forever
between the physical
and spiritual realms.
I got the sense
of an enormous evil.
Uh, alleged enormous evil.
Look, I can go deeper,
but that might give Jack
control over me.
I... [clears throat]
will control him.
My superior ability to focus
my psychic kinetic energy
will have a cooling effect
on your agitated fluids.
-Mm.
-Superior.
Yeah. I feel so much better
That-- Then we will proceed.
[stutters] I will. Just give me
a moment to gather my strength.
[tea kettle whistling]
Ah, the tea is ready,
and we could use a rest.
Lily, would you like
to help, please?
Uh, sure.
[Victoria]
Lovely.
You know, I have always said
that no matter what the problem,
-tea always improves
one's perspective.
-Mm.
Seymour,
you need more discipline.
Discipline strengthens the will.
I like discipline.
If as long as she doesn't have
a problem with it.
-When you channel Jack,
will you have him firmly?
-Yes.
And will he be able to control
your body like the previous one?
Yeah, he will be...
[sighs] ...if--
He might even have
some slight physical power
if he's strong enough.
Like what?
[stutters] Blowing
some air, candle.
Well, I can handle the weather.
Uh, let me know
when you are ready to proceed.
I just need
a couple more moments
to gather my strength again.
[exclaims]
Would you mind pouring, dear?
My hands have been
particularly stiff today.
Oh, I'd be happy to.
-[Victoria] Tea is served.
-Oh, cucumber
and watercress sandwiches.
It's my favorite.
Huh. How are you feeling, dear?
You look pale.
Uh, well, I've watched Seymour
conduct séances for years.
It's a wonderful skill.
We go around and we do
a lot of good for people.
-But...
-Yes?
-Channeling Jack feels wrong.
-[laughs]
We're in the Auldcraft Manor.
Nothing wrong ever happens here.
Could you take this
to Seymour, dear?
It just,
it doesn't make any sense.
I just don't understand
why this is so hard.
Is his name written down?
[Richard]
Yes. [clears throat]
His name is duly inscribed.
Unlike yours.
Yeah, thanks
for rubbing that in. [sighs]
Something is tying Jack
to this world
and interfering
with the connection.
Um, Beatrice said something
that you should know.
-What?
-[Richard] Uh, Gerald.
Uh, there's no need
to trouble Seymour with trivia.
-But--
-I said it's irrelevant.
[clears throat]
May I talk to you?
-Privately?
-Sure.
Seymour, you're going
to go deeper?
Yeah, I have to.
There's interference.
But the deeper you go,
the more the spirit
is in control.
Well, look, I can handle it.
What is it with this place?
Why is there
so much spiritual energy here?
-Can't say.
-You mean you won't say.
This isn't some child's game
of hokey-pokey.
This is stepping in,
and stepping out,
and shaking
this fair world all about.
Lily, I'll be fine, all right?
I wasn't this weirded out
when we met the ghost
of Christmas Past,
Present, and Future.
Look, those were carolers,
all right?
They were very scary carolers.
Lily.
What? [sighs]
-Slap me.
-What? Come again.
If Jack does take control,
a slap will shock him
into releasing me.
Are you sure?
I'm positive.
-Well, there's something else.
-What?
[door opens]
Oh, no.
Good evening.
-Why, good evening, Julia.
-Julia?
You look lovely tonight.
Don't I always?
[whispering] You're supposed
to stay at the party.
Darling, you are here,
and handsome as ever.
Black always suited you.
[stutters] I'm in the middle
of something.
[Julia]
And who is our guest?
I insist on being introduced.
She hasn't been invited
to the party.
But she has been invited to tea.
I'm Lily.
Seymour "the Seer's" assistant.
[laughs]
-Is this a séance?
-Yeah.
Then I am decidedly staying.
But we've already started.
Well, why shouldn't she stay?
See, we've decided.
-Hey--
-Oh, wait.
Not, not in front
of my girlfriend.
-Girlfriend?
-Girlfriend.
But, honey, why haven't
you mentioned her to me?
Yeah, Seymour,
why haven't you mentioned me?
-I was busy.
-[scoffs]
That's silly.
I'm not threatened in the least.
After all,
no one can replace me.
Why not?
[Julia]
No, dear.
Do you have one of those
"we mustn't talk" relationships?
Perhaps you are ready
to continue.
-Oh, of course. I mean--
-Wonderful.
Gerald, would you show Julia
a seat?
Oh... [clears throat]
Got you.
-[clears throat]
-Thank you, sweetie.
Sure.
[exhales sharply]
How close are you
and Julia exactly?
[chuckles]
Just about a natural distance.
We've always been close.
I've-- I've known her
since I was a child.
In fact, he was the first person
I ever possessed.
-Possessed?
-Oh.
All the time,
and in every available location.
-Why? I remember--
-Julia!
Darling!
How else am I
to handle my competition?
-She's not your--
-Might I remind you
time is of the essence?
Stop this distaff tittle-tattle
at once.
[exclaims] No more talking!
No more questions.
No more comments.
Nothing.
Let's hold hands
around the table.
[suspenseful music]
-Lily?
-Yes.
Take my hand.
-Oh. All right.
-[sighs]
Would you please perform
the incantation for me?
Absolutely.
Spirits, come to Seymour,
keeper of secrets
and teller of lies.
It looks like his girlfriend
is getting wise.
[laughs]
I like it. [laughs]
Are we channeling Dr. Phil?
Lily.
[sighs] All right.
Spirits from beyond the veil,
follow my voice and do not fail.
[tense music]
[Seymour]
Lily, keep going.
Spirits, awake,
Seymour "the Seer" awaits.
Hear him.
Fear him.
Night be true and clear,
let the tortured one appear.
Jack, arise from the grave.
We are your master.
You are our sl*ve.
[chandelier clinking]
Jack, are you with us?
Please give us a sign.
[crackling]
Wow. We asked for a sign,
not a billboard.
[laughing maniacally]
[as Jack]
Ah! Good evening, everyone.
I trust we're all
prim and proper.
So, we are speaking to Jack?
Mm, you are speaking at me,
Richard.
As is your want.
You know, it was some hard work
getting me out. Cheers.
-So you knew
about our difficulty?
-Of course.
-Then you also know the cause.
-Yes.
And who k*lled you?
A Kn*fe k*lled me.
And what a wonderful surprise
that was.
[Richard]
Talk straight, man!
Are all my souvenirs in place?
[Richard] What are you doing?
Why are you going
through the family safe?
-No one's used that in years.
-Oh.
No one except me.
Ah! [clicks tongue] It's
always good to have a spare.
You know, the coppers
confiscated my last one.
That's all they got though.
Please tell me
that does not contain
crime scene souvenirs.
All right, I won't.
[clicks tongue] Did you like
Mary Kelly's scarf?
It matched her eyes.
[Victoria]
So, you did hurt those women?
Oh, yes. Well, more than hurt.
Well, at least your victims
are going to-- to heaven.
And I helped them get there,
express.
Well, you're going straight
to the bad place.
Not straight to the bad place.
I mean, obviously.
[sighs]
What's your name, crumpet?
Don't be shy.
I don't bite.
-Because I'm dead.
-Might I remind you,
you are in my household.
Your household?
[Richard]
Yes, and under my roof.
I will not allow disrespect
to the weaker sex.
They have enough problems.
[snickers] Yeah, they do.
But this is your roof?
Wh-- What an absurd question.
-Because now this roof is mine.
-[loud thud]
[ominous music]
[Julia]
What's happening?
Oh. This is neat.
Stop. There's no way
you have this much power.
[Seymour as Jack]
You're right.
With this body, I have more.
What is that?
It's time for a new order,
and for new rules
in my kind of fun.
Sorry, Jack. Play time is over.
[laughing]
What was that?
I-- That's supposed
to snap you out of it.
You're a pretty one, aren't you?
Uh, sure.
Do you know what I do
-with pretty ones?
-Let them die of old age?
[Seymour as Jack]
I do let them die.
[Lily gasps]
How dare you?
Wow.
Uh!
Man, I missed.
Let's try again.
Practice, practice, practice.
It's how you get
to help a whore.
Enough!
[dramatic music]
[lights buzzing]
By power of parchment and pen,
return the way you came in.
I banish you!
Gerald, strike him.
With pleasure.
Jack, you were a lousy brother.
Ah, Gerald.
Still sniveling
over your dead girlfriend,
-with the drinking--
-Hold that thought.
-[punches]
-[gasps] Seymour.
Oh! You banished him.
Oh, let's not speak of it.
-But are you sure
that wasn't necessary?
-Don't question my judgment.
He needed to be returned
to the ether.
[Seymour groans in normal voice]
Hey, you're back.
[groans] What happened?
Uh, you att*cked Lily
with Cupid.
What?
Well, I, I guess Jack, um,
att*cked her, sh*t love's arrow.
But, but not in a cute
Cupid shuffle kind of way.
It was more of a Dexter:
Valentine's Day Special way.
Something's screwing with
the natural order of things.
-Excuse me.
-Nonsense.
Everything is, uh,
working exactly as expected.
[exhales] I gained the sense
of something malevolent.
Maybe that's what
Beatrice meant.
What? Beatrice imparted
a message?
She said that
whatever it was that
was anchoring Jack to this plane
needed to be destroyed,
that it was evil.
-[thunder rumbling]
-I wish I never agreed
to do this.
Jack had more psychic energy
than I have seen anyone have.
But that's impossible.
He's only been dead
for, like, three days.
Amassing that kind of
psychic-kinetic energy
takes years.
It takes decades.
Well, he found a way.
Excuse me?
What--
What is going on?
The room,
and Jack and the arrow?
Am I going insane?
Poor thing.
-Tell her.
-[stutters] Absolutely not.
Tell her everything or I will.
[stutters] My lips and my tome
-are sealed.
-Perhaps just this--
-[Lily] What's this--
-We're ghosts.
What?
Julia.
-That is our most
closely guarded family secret.
-Please.
How long were you going
to string her along?
An eternity?
It was getting old.
-Ghosts?
-'Fraid so.
Boo, sweetheart.
But that can't be.
Um, hey, watch this.
[ululating]
[groans] Stop that.
Most insensitive.
So Richard is like
the dawn of the family.
And Victoria
is my dead great grandmother.
And Julia...
...is Seymour's mother.
His, uh...
And everyone else,
all the partygoers,
they are past generations
of the Auldcrafts
that are all gathered together
for a huge family reunion
at Halloween.
Feting me
and the destiny I bequeath them.
And that is why
it is so exclusive.
Because you have to be dead
in order to get in.
So, I think that
about covers it.
That's about it.
We're all on the same page.
But we don't know
who k*lled Jack.
Or how he acquired that power.
Or if she is worthy
of my Seymour.
I, I, I didn't say
we finished the book.
So this, and you're all and I...
[panting]
-Uh.
-Oh. Oh.
Excuse me
while I get some smelling salts.
[sniffs, gasps] Ghosts!
I was dreaming that I was--
Still here,
and I'm still fabulous.
You're all ghosts!
Um, except for me.
Wow.
I've searched for evidence
of the supernatural
my entire life,
and until now, all I could
manage was... [chuckles]
...a streaked photograph.
Are you okay?
Okay?
Wow. I am great.
I should be recording this.
[chuckles]
Well, now that you know,
I should relay the entire
Auldcraft family history.
[giggles softly]
The Auldcraft family--
Excuse me, dear.
The Auldcraft family came
to this land over 200 years ago
searching for opportunity,
and we found it like most.
Richard founded
the Auldcraft family fortune
and built this lovely mansion,
and he found a way
to keep us together,
even after death.
Isn't that wonderful?
All the Auldcrafts fly
to the mansion after passing,
and they share rooms,
and the generations
tell stories.
Seymour, you knew
about the ghosts?
Of course he knew.
All the Auldcrafts
know the family history.
Seymour. This is incredible.
Why didn't you tell me?
This... [clears throat]
...is not some idle
fireside gossip.
This is a treasured family's
secret, at least until now.
Seymour, they're ghosts
you can see.
Please do try to keep up.
We've recorded
low-register moaning, flickers.
Now I can prove everything.
There's one more thing
you should know.
Don't you dare!
She should know
what we're dealing with.
[suspenseful music]
[lights buzzing]
[Richard]
Is nothing sacred?
[Seymour]
Lily, meet
the Auldcraft family sigil.
It's the key
to our way of life after death.
Wow. Explain how it works.
Any name written in the sigil
will be kept from traveling
to the great beyond.
The ultimate family scrapbook.
Seymour, I don't see your name.
Well, I'm not on it.
I appear to be immune somehow.
But once a name is added
to the sigil... [chuckles]
...it is bound to this house
until death.
Then what happened to Jack?
I mean, Jonathan Theodore?
I can still read his name.
Although it's faint.
I have the power
to banish any soul
bound in the sigil to the ether.
What exactly is the ether?
It's like
a supernatural drunk t*nk.
In theory, Jack should have gone
straight to the bad place,
but, instead, he's able
to linger in the ether.
[stutters] Why doesn't
he appear on his own?
Uh, why does he need
to go through you?
That's the thing.
It doesn't make sense.
Unless the sigil is acting
like some sort of transmitter.
We have to find out.
Seymour, you will have
to channel Jack again.
You serious?
After what I almost did to her?
-I think I'll pass.
-[sighs]
Yes, that's what you do,
Seymour. You pass.
I am deceased and I have more
of a life than you do.
Richard Auldcraft, you have not
blessed this family.
-You've cursed it.
-Oh, pfft.
There you go
with your, your lies.
I did nothing of the sort.
Ghosts are my profession,
all right?
I can recognize a curse
when I see a curse.
The sigil is not a curse.
It's a blessing.
Mm. And how did you attain
this blessing?
Why don't you tell us?
I am amazing!
You met someone.
What happened?
After I made my fortune
in molasses and whale oil--
Believe me,
you don't want to get
those two bottles confused.
I wanted to build
a mansion big enough to...
[sighs] house the entire
family for generations,
and that's when I met the angel.
And how did you know
he was an angel?
Uh, big wings,
he carried a quill
and a scale of justice.
It reminded me of a lawyer.
[laughs] Uh...
I signed a covenant
that suspended judgment
upon death indefinitely
for me and my heirs.
Richard.
There's only one kind of angel
that has scales.
Fallen angels.
-[tense music]
-Who are commonly known
as demons.
-I need a drink.
-Preposterous.
We've been fine
for hundreds of years.
Yeah.
But now Jack is coming
to k*ll us all.
You haven't blessed this family.
You've cursed it.
How dare you?
How dare you accuse me
of such a calumny?
You put this entire family
in danger,
our very mortal souls.
If you had a sense of honor,
you would undo
what you have done.
How dare you speak
to me of honor?
You, of all people?
-What's happening?
-[distant rumble]
Your very birth
besmirched the family honor!
Richard, listen to me for once.
And what exactly
would you have me do?
-You need to destroy the sigil!
-[Richard] Destroy it?
The sigil is our way
of afterlife.
Destroy it.
Cease this, cease this at once!
Richard, calm down.
You're gonna pop a lightbulb.
-[light bulb explodes]
-Oh! Too late!
-[grunts]
-[Victoria] Richard, no.
-Don't hurt my baby.
-[Richard grunts]
There's more than one way
to deal with a pest.
Victoria, do something.
Help him.
This ends now!
-No!
-Sigil.
Sigil, by the power
of parchment and pen,
release Richard.
[dramatic music]
What are you doing?
Sigil, I command you,
release Richard Auldcraft.
-Yeah.
-Yeah, I...
The big cheese eaten
just like that.
[stutters] I didn't,
I didn't think that would work.
-You banished him.
-[Victoria] I...
Oh, my deepest apologies.
I panicked.
Well, you panicked like a fox.
He was gonna k*ll Seymour.
Oh, we don't know that.
What? He wasn't gonna use
that candlestick
for a candle at dinner.
Well, he isn't here
to defend himself,
so let's just,
let's just drop the matter.
-Did he go to the bad place?
-[Seymour] No.
The sigil says,
"Unfinished business."
He's anchored in the ether
just like Jack.
Why didn't you mention
something about that earlier?
I, I got drunk
at the Devil's party.
I mean, th--
this isn't gonna look good
in the big book in the sky.
There's not much you can do.
[sighs]
Without Richard here, I--
I needed him
to destroy the sigil.
-Pardon?
-Why?
They're tied together.
He created the covenant,
only he can rescind it.
If he did agree,
what would you have done?
[sighs]
Well, we would've
reenacted the ceremony
and reversed the sequence
of events.
Then we're stuck here
without him.
Yeah.
What-- You couldn't have
mentioned that
in the heat of the argument?
Well, he was busy yelling.
-[sighs]
-Are you sure
there's no other way?
Uh, okay.
What if we call the Devil
and complain about the warranty
on this thing?
[stutters] There's-- No, we--
Okay, look, you've got magic.
Wave your hands, make sparks.
Look.
Kapow!
Goodbye, sigil, right?
There is a small possibility
that I could destroy it
without Richard's help.
Right. Oh.
Then let's do it. Kapow!
But there's a large possibility
that I could send everyone
down to the bad place.
-Well, let's just
hold that thought.
-Yeah.
Curses are more difficult
to deal with than frizzy hair
on a humid day.
Well, it's not a curse.
It, it may have
started out like that,
but, but it's done nothing
but good things for our family.
At the end of the day,
it keeps you from going
to where you need to be.
No, it keeps us together.
Yeah, but now we're together
with the spirit
of a cold-blooded m*rder*r.
Well, I can't be
held accountable
for modern schooling.
If Richard's still here,
What if you channeled him?
Could he revoke the sigil, then?
I mean, yeah,
but not if he doesn't want to.
Let me talk to him.
I may be able
to change his perspective.
[scoffs] I tried
changing that perspective
for my entire life.
And I have been successfully
changing it well beyond that.
Okay... [sighs]
Hold on.
[exhales sharply]
[suspenseful music]
I can see Jack.
He-- He's waiting for me.
[chuckles nervously]
He wants
to possess me permanently.
And he will
if I try to channel again.
How can he do that?
Sigil?
[stutters] The sigil
is just a piece of paper.
Heaven help us if it's not.
Julia, how do names
get on the sigil?
Only Richard understood
how it works.
Sometimes a name appears
at birth,
sometimes at marriage,
and sometimes even after death.
So we really are out of options?
What can we do?
There is one technique I know,
but it's extremely dangerous,
and it could, it could hurt
everybody, living or dead.
Please tell us.
[sighs] I've practiced
some of the ancient studies,
and these...
[exhales] ...are ways that
a priest would consult the dead.
-Okay.
-Like what?
So I'm gonna have to go out
and buy some, uh, goat's blood
No. No.
[exhales] They used visual means
to consult with them.
Passed for the ghosts to go on
to appear before the living.
Doors to the other side.
We could communicate
with Richard's spirit
and reverse the ceremony?
In theory. [sighs]
Direct links to the afterlife
are notoriously unstable.
But if someone
were to go through the door,
they could find Richard
and retrieve him.
Yes.
In fact, that would be safer
than me going in
and opening the door myself.
That's all I need to hear.
I'm going.
-You?
-[exhales sharply]
I'm the one
that banished Richard.
I should be the one
to bring him back.
You'd risk death?
Don't be ridiculous.
I'm already dead.
[sighs]
But I, I have no idea what
will happen if I attempt this.
Uh, you could be lost forever
in the haze
between the phy-- physical
and the spiritual realms.
We have to control
this power, Seymour.
It must not control us.
-All right.
-[inhales sharply]
Everybody, stand back.
But before I depart,
I would like
to go see the family.
-Why?
-They really should know
that Richard's passed and--
Well, I'd like
to say my farewells
in case something happens.
I'll go with you.
Give me a minute
to calibrate my ectometer.
Dear, dear, I'm so sorry,
but this really must be
restricted to family.
And I am not family.
I understand.
-Gerald?
-Yeah.
Would you escort me, please?
[sighs]
My parents are out there.
You know that, right?
Yes, of course.
I never exactly saw
eye to eye with them
even when they had eyes.
As the oldest living
representative of the family.
[exhales] Let's rock.
-Seymour, you go too.
-Me?
I'll stay here
and keep Lily company.
We'll have
a b*ating-heart-to-heart talk.
-Ah...
-See? She loves the idea.
Hurry along.
-Uh...
-Now, how long have you known
my Seymour?
Three years.
I have a degree
in linguistic archaeology,
and we met
when I was writing my thesis
on talking in tongues.
Ah, yes,
another of Seymour's
many talents.
It's not every boyfriend
who can tweet in Biblical Greek.
And you've dated him
all that time?
For the past year.
Until then, I was his assistant.
-In the ghost trade?
-Yes.
-And you enjoy your profession?
-I love it.
Why?
-Uh...
-Surely, dear,
I'm asking honestly.
Well, sometimes
people need a second chance,
but death's a barrier
they can't cross.
Yes, the River Styx flows
only one way.
Seymour comes in,
helps everyone say
what they need to say.
You enjoy that.
I can't describe the thrill.
When we help,
everything feels brighter.
The only thing
that I love more than that is...
Your hair is a lovely, my dear,
-but you really
should do something with it.
-Excuse me?
I am sorry, that came out wrong.
I mean, you should change
your hairstyle
while you still can.
What's wrong with it?
Once you're dead, you're frozen
in your present state.
I've been making this dress work
for 20 years.
Believe me, don't worry
about dying in clean underwear.
Worry about your hair.
-Twenty years?
-Yes.
Seymour is 20.
He is.
How time flies when you're dead.
You d*ed when he was born?
Only a few months after.
Wha-- What happened?
[tense music]
Well... when I got pregnant,
marriage was out
of the question.
Not because I wasn't lovely.
You understand?
But because the father
was already married.
Everyone was terribly upset.
But I insisted
on keeping the baby.
Then I d*ed.
How? How did you die?
I can't seem to recall.
Try to remember, Julia.
I have a feeling it's important.
I remember that Richard and I
had just had
a spectacular fight.
Over what?
It seems trivial now,
but Richard refused
to register Seymour's name
in the family Bible
with the other Auldcrafts.
[chandelier clinking]
[ominous music]
I remember now.
It's coming back to me.
I snuck back into the library
to add Seymour's name
to the family Bible.
I decided I didn't need
Richard's approval.
[male voice]
Julia.
Julia.
Richard.
[male voice]
Julia.
Richard, is that you?
[male voice]
Julia, what are you doing?
I'm adding Seymour's name
to the family Bible,
and you can't stop me.
[male voice]
It doesn't work that way, Julia.
He's an Auldcraft,
just like
all the other Auldcrafts.
[male voice]
I agree that Seymour
is a very special boy,
and he should be raised
in a very special way.
So you will add his name.
[male voice]
Eventually, his name
will be inscribed
with the others on the list,
I promise you.
That's not good enough.
I want his name
written down tonight,
or I will leave this house
in the morning
and take Seymour with me.
[male voice]
Poor little Julia,
I can see you're upset.
You know I always get my way.
[male voice]
So do I.
I think you should go outside
and take a walk.
[suspenseful music]
[Julia screams]
Now I remember.
I d*ed in the cemetery.
Covered in the winter's snow.
How horrible.
After I d*ed, parties were out
of the question, of course,
except for Halloween.
And I realized,
I could still raise Seymour.
How?
Which was difficult,
but we made it work.
I would possess him in
the morning and make breakfast.
Then un-possess him
in time for school.
And every night,
I would float over his bed
and moan bedtime stories.
So you raised Seymour
even though you are a ghost?
There's something about tonight
that reminds me
of the time I d*ed.
But the memory is out of reach.
The figure
on the other side of a window.
[Gerald laughing]
No, no, no, no.
-How about those shapeshifters?
-[laughter]
Oh, talk
about your party animals.
And did you catch that
xylophoning skeleton band?
Oh, I hope they party that hard
-when they find out I d*ed.
-[Seymour] Ah.
They were excited.
Oh, they would have been
hopping up and down
if they had their feet.
[chuckles]
Richard obviously made
quite an impression
throughout the ages.
Oh, there were
some 19th century cusswords
-that they needed
to get off their chest.
-[chuckles]
You would think
mature manifestations
could manage their decorum.
Well, and instead it's This
House is Cleansed dance party.
Well, I'm just glad
that they're taking
my imminent departure
in a more subdued manner.
What's up with you two?
Just girl talk.
-Julia raised you as a ghost?
-Mm, yeah.
Whole life.
Do you think that's
where your gift came from?
[sighs] I mean,
not a lot of people grow up
being constantly possessed.
So maybe...
And it wasn't just Julia.
The whole family took advantage
of his channeling skills.
We just so rarely have a chance
to interact with the living.
I was the youngest guy
had a lot of bridge matches.
[laughs] The look on some of
those ladies' faces when he won.
-[laughs]
-Oh, I also got kicked out of
Civil w*r Historical Societies.
Well, they never knew
who he was gonna argue for,
the north or the south.
So yes, it's, it's,
it's certainly possible
that Seymour's powers emanated
from his unique childhood.
Do you think that's why
you're not named on the sigil?
I mean, it could be,
but a lot of people just
are passed over for some reason.
You had this whole amazing life
and you never told me.
I promised to keep their secret.
I'm glad I know.
Seymour was raised
in a very loving family,
albeit a, a little peculiar.
I do love your spin, Gran.
[chuckles]
Well...
I think I'm ready.
[exhales sharply]
Any final advice?
Oh. Yes.
Proper penmanship is important
to both the living and the dead.
And a freshly ironed shirt
is never cause for regret.
Okay, iron shirts, check.
A-- And, uh, parents shouldn't
argue in front of the children.
Okay, if, if I promise
to read Emily Post,
can we just get on with it?
Well...
...it's been a lovely life
and an even better death.
[chuckles]
Do the Auldcraft family proud.
[Seymour]
All right.
How do we proceed?
Oh, please tell me
she has to knock
"Shave and a Haircut."
[Seymour]
Simply open the door.
-[Victoria] Seymour,
it's not working.
-[Lily] Seymour.
-There's too much interference.
-[Victoria] Oh.
-Victoria, you have
to keep trying.
-I'm trying.
Seymour, stop this.
She isn't going to make it.
Victoria, you have
to open the door.
I can't reach the door.
[screams]
-Victoria!
-[scream echoing]
[thunder rumbles]
That wasn't supposed to happen.
[stutters] It didn't.
She's in the beyond,
but the door failed.
Can she speak to Richard?
I mean, yeah, but, uh,
without a stable working door,
I can't get either of them back.
Well, can you do it again?
[sighs]
I can sense Jack
What's he doing?
He wants to come back.
And he'll come through
if I open another door.
What can we do?
[exhales]
I have to think.
Seymour, I love you.
But there's something
that bothers me.
-What?
-This is
a freaking piece of paper.
It doesn't take woo-woo magic
to destroy it.
It just takes
two functioning hands.
Let's destroy
Richard's demon love letter now.
Gerald, I've told you this.
It's extremely dangerous.
Well, and, and I'm sure
to your handwaving magic,
this is probably stupid,
but look at this.
Is it putting up
much of a struggle?
Does this look dangerous,
scary to you?
-Gerald, put that back
right now.
-Or what?
I'm gonna get a paper cut?
-[thunder rumbling]
-[tense music]
Beatrice told me
to destroy this thing,
and I'm going to do it
for her and for all lost loves!
-Gerald--
-You have caused enough trouble.
-Time to go by bye-bye.
-Gerald, stop!
-I ain't afraid
of no dead ghost!
-[Seymour] Don't. Stop!
-[Julia] Gerald...
-[Seymour] You don't know...
-...what you're doing.
-[Julia] ...it's watching you.
[Gerald]
No, it's making the room
do the samba.
-Take it.
-[Seymour] You maniac,
give it back.
-Time to go rippity-rip.
-No!
-[sigil creaks]
-[all screaming]
[screaming]
[music intensifies]
[scream echoing]
[music stops]
[Julia sighs]
And you can see me.
I'm not invisible.
[Lily]
I can see you.
And I'm not floating.
Tell me I'm not floating.
You're not floating
You know,
that's something, I guess.
Not only did it k*ll me,
but it made a mess.
I'm sorry,
I can't help clean up.
Like you would have anyway.
This is so weak.
You know, I kind of
remember telling you
not to touch the sigil.
It was a piece of paper.
It's a piece of paper
created by a demon.
[muffled chatter]
The party is picking back up.
Should we tell them to stop?
I don't see
what good it would do.
[Gerald murmurs]
Let 'em play the wailing waltz
as long as they can.
You know something?
Being a ghost sobers you up.
Yeah?
[sighs]
It's my worst nightmare
realized.
You know, that really sucks.
I kind of wish I had warned you.
You know, maybe it would've
prevented you
from doing something stupid.
Yeah, well...
...smack me upside the head
if you can find my body.
[distant echo]
What was that?
[suspenseful music]
That's Jack.
Look at the sigil.
[Gerald]
Oh! Wow, it's, it's Vegas style.
Jack is coming back.
Yeah, and soon.
Why couldn't he have been
an evil botanist?
Then we could be tormented
in an evil rose garden.
I don't think the Devil's
interested in foliage.
Well, he started off wrapped
around a tree, didn't he?
Is there anything we can do
to prevent Jack from returning?
Or defend ourselves.
I don't know.
Um, not that it matters,
now that I'm a ghost.
Uh...
There are ways
to t*rture ghosts.
And I'm hearing about this now.
-Strange.
-What?
Nothing. Never mind.
It felt like someone
just walked over my grave.
The way this night is going,
someone probably drove
a hummer over it.
Hey, I've got it.
Channel a marine to fight him.
[stutters] You're kidding.
Well, [stutters] we can,
we can use
night creature goggles
and att*ck 'em
with ectoplasmic grenades.
That, that's not how this works,
though.
[chuckles] That's not
how any of this works.
Well, call Casper then,
I hear he's friendly.
No, he's not.
What kind
of busted Ghostbuster argue?
The kind that's responsible.
-[sighs]
-Julia.
You seem distracted.
Sorry.
Almost as if...
[music increases]
Kids...
...you may want to get out of
here while you're still alive.
I'm not leaving.
So neither am I.
[sigil]
Good evening.
Richard, how are you back?
[sigil]
Please don't compare me
to that bumptious buffoon.
You sound like Richard.
Who are you?
The sigil.
[sigil]
So, you do remember me.
You were the voice
that spoke to me when I d*ed.
[sigil]
Of course.
Why are you
showing yourself now?
[sigil]
Now that Richard is gone,
it's not possible
to reverse the ceremony
that created me.
Yeah, yeah.
We've had all kinds of bad news.
Oh, and, hey,
thanks for k*lling me.
[sigil]
I had to protect myself.
Well, next time try lamination.
[sigil]
Stop trying to keep me at bay.
How noble.
Forgive me. Wrong word.
Pathetic!
I can hold you off.
[sigil]
We both know that's not true.
I'm gathering power
even as we speak.
How would you like
to spend the rest of your days
stapled to the back
of a Chinese takeout menu?
[sigil]
Such theatrics,
just like your little friend.
-Beatrice?
-[sigil] Too bad
about her little accident.
I'm sure
she would appreciate the irony
of dying in a cemetery.
You k*lled Beatrice?
-Why?
-[sigil] Every haunted mansion
needs a drunken caretaker.
[laughs]
It's a tradition,
and like
dearly departed Richard,
I do cherish my traditions.
I would have quit drinking
after Beatrice and I
were married.
[sigil]
You do not think
I knew of your plans
to convert this house
to a summer stock theater?
I may be consigned
to the netherworld,
but even I have my limits.
No one wants you here.
Go away!
[sigil]
Silly child.
The only desires that matter
are my own.
All I want is some white-out.
-What's that?
-[sigil] Jack hates
that he's missing the party.
Leave Jack out of this.
[sigil]
But I've always accommodated
the wishes
of the Auldcraft family.
[tense music]
[Gerald]
Seymour,
now might be a good time
to have a trick up his sleeve.
[whoosh]
-You okay?
-[exhales sharply]
The sigil is right.
It's gaining power.
-[sighs]
-Well...
Okay, everyone,
take a minute
to catch your lack of breath.
[sighs] Julia,
the sigil spoke to you
before this?
Spoke to me the night I d*ed.
That awful, haunting voice.
It sounded like Richard,
but somehow I knew
it wasn't him.
So it was the sigil that
lured you into the cemetery?
-Yes.
-Man.
That sigil loves k*lling people
more than bad movie directors.
But why? Why would the sigil
want me dead?
Because you were going
to take Seymour away.
And it's difficult
for a piece of paper
to file for visitation rights.
It wants me to be
the human receptacle
for Jack the Ripper.
Now that Richard's gone,
it's got more power.
It's going to force me
to channel Jack.
It's going to turn you
into an army of ghosts.
So we're not only drafts,
we'll be drafted.
This night can start
getting better anytime now.
What can we do?
[suspenseful music]
Since Richard's not here,
there's no way for me
to get rid of it on my own.
We have to get him back,
whatever the cost.
You're not going
to try to create the door again.
Remember what happened
to Victoria when she tried
to open it?
I have to.
I'll force the door open.
No one will have
to touch it this time.
But what will you do
if Jack tries to step through?
[sighs]
I'll slam the door in his face.
Great. So everything depends
on metaphysical rules
of etiquette.
Lily...
...it's time for you to leave.
Not the type of door you need
to be showing me, Seymour.
But this isn't up
for discussion.
So you need my help
to channel ghosts,
but forcing them back
to the land of the living
-is solo time?
-Yeah.
So I'm just trying
to follow your logic here.
Apparently,
the more circles we cross,
the more you want
to be ringleader.
My logic is to see you
out of this place.
It's too dangerous.
It's getting risky.
Which we'll face together,
like we always have.
If we can face
the Loch Ness monster together,
we can face this.
Lily, that was a branch
floating in the water.
It was a very scary branch.
This is different. [sighs]
And you're right.
[sighs] It is solo time.
[magic chime]
Hey, this is
super unnatural cheating.
Guys...
Oh.
Seymour? Hey, let me in.
-Wow.
-Sweetie, your power
is incredible.
I did grow up around ghosts.
But all we can do is float books
and flicker lights.
Yeah, my bar tricks were
a lot better when I was alive.
But this,
this is one of a kind special.
One of a kind special.
Then you knew.
Of course I knew.
I had to keep
my abilities secret.
I, I couldn't risk being used
as an experiment.
Or, or a w*apon.
-I had to keep them secret
from my friends, from my...
-[muffled] Let me in.
Hey. Hello. I know
you can hear me. I'm so mad.
From reality television
producers.
But now Lily knows.
And accepts you.
She's an amazing girl.
Are you trying
to make me feel worse?
-No.
-[exhales sharply]
Let's get on with it.
-All right--
-I'm starting to lose my nerve.
Go then.
Everyone, get ready.
-[gentle music]
-[sighs]
[thunder rumbling]
[ethereal music]
Almost there.
Seymour.
Hurry. Jack is coming.
Richard, step through.
-Victoria!
-Head toward the light,
or the [indistinct].
Nothing's happening.
[Richard]
I'm coming.
Toward the light.
I, I thought you wanted
to annoy Seymour,
so I brought up women's rights.
Don't you hear them?
They're calling us.
Sorry, does this have anything
to do with that upstart
Alexander Bell?
No, they want us
to come through.
[shivering]
Honestly, Richard,
in over 200 years,
did you never learn to RSVP?
Oh, oh. He's behind us.
Seymour.
Here's Jack!
-[slams]
-What is this?
You're behind bars,
where you belong.
These bars won't hold me.
-Well, I will.
-The sigil wants me
in complete control.
Did you really think
Richard was afforded
this opportunity
because of his
charming personality?
It is rather charming.
The fallen knew
you would rise one day.
Why would the fallen care?
They can't even get up.
A boy with incredible power,
a man who could shape
the destiny of the entire world.
You're wrong.
When I have your power,
everyone will bleed!
You monster.
That's why I was stabbed
with a Kn*fe.
That's why I d*ed.
[thunder rumbling]
[Julia]
Seymour!
My spirit,
so we could be united,
and Richard won't ruin it
this time.
I never ruin anything.
That's a good thing.
Idiots.
Honestly, I have no idea
what's going on.
Your name will be written
on the sigil at last.
[Lily]
No.
-Lily!
-[panting] Hold this.
[music intensifies]
[both groan]
Ow.
How did you get back in?
Uh, the front door was open,
I walked right through.
You're kidding me!
What? Ghosts are
a great security system.
I'm going to k*ll you again.
Oh, I'm sorry.
The next time my nephew attempts
to find Jack the Ripper
to his hell cloud,
without using his girlfriend,
I'll remember
to lock the freaking door.
You may remove yourself
from me, Victoria. [exhales]
-[groans]
-Honestly, Richard,
you have the gratitude of a cat.
[groaning]
Are you okay?
I'm okay, but I'm drained.
-[grunts, mumbles]
-We're here. Oh.
And it's so wonderful
to see everyone.
Well, welcome back to the party.
How was, uh, limbo?
Oh, interminable. It was
like calling for the butler,
-and he would never come.
-Speak for yourself.
The butler responded
immediately. [chuckles]
Lily, are you okay?
I feel funny. [exhales sharply]
[Seymour]
What did you do to her?
[sigil]
There are consequences
to disobedience.
If she's into
that sort of thing.
Are we addressing
a piece of paper?
[sigil]
I inscribed a new name.
Perhaps not the one
I originally intended,
but one I quite like.
"Lily Herdston."
It says, "Lily Herdston."
That's me.
[sigil]
Funny thing about doors.
You can walk through
either side.
[thunder rumbling]
-[Lily] No.
-No! Seymour, no.
Remember what happened to me?
I kept her safe!
I kept her away from you!
[sigil]
Mortals!
Is that how my voice sounds?
It's been a long night.
Is that the real reason
why you didn't want to marry me?
[grunts]
Well, this has nothing to do
with you being a modern man
who needs his space. You just,
you wanted to protect me
from being cursed?
He wanted to protect me
from the bridal registry.
I hate paying for wrapping paper
and silver ribbon.
-Gerald.
-What?
Dead fiancé card.
I couldn't risk you
for anything.
[inhales sharply] I, I got--
You wanted to marry me?
I wanted to marry you
more than anything.
-[sighs]
-Seymour, you're an idiot.
I can deal with any curse
if I were with you.
Don't you know me at all?
I'm Seymour
"the Seer's" assistant,
and together, we do
the impossible before breakfast.
Breakfast?
Are we having breakfast already?
[laughs]
-What?
-Richard.
You need to tell me
how to enter names in the sigil.
Now, why would I do that?
[chuckles]
-To save us.
-Julia?
Is this another one
of your feminine causes?
To get her name off of it.
That's why.
Well, I'm afraid
that's impossible. [exhales]
Once a name is added to the
sigil, it's written indelibly.
I do have the power to banish
a spirit to the ether,
but even then, the--
the, the ink, it only fades.
-It does not disappear.
-[thunder rumbling]
[tense music]
Best thing I ever did
was sign that contract,
even better
than whale oil. [chuckles]
[Seymour]
Well, it's time to revoke
the contract right now.
-No more excuses.
-[stutters]
You would have me
return my gift to the family.
Size didn't fit, Richard.
I, I need to consider
the ramifications
of such a decision.
We need to recreate the ceremony
so I can reverse it.
Aren't we being hasty?
Perhaps the sigil can be
reasoned with.
Reasoned with?
That thing's worse than
a time-share run by the UN.
It was only acting
in self-defense.
Self-defense? It wrote her name.
Perhaps it wishes to give her
the same blessing as well.
[sigil]
May I weigh in?
[all]
No.
Huh, I could never deny
that incredible voice.
[sigil]
Richard, think of the future,
and your legacy.
The entire world
will know the name Auldcraft.
The entire world.
[sigil]
Your portrait
will be on everyone's mantel.
Uh, I'd rather have it
on the money.
Richard, don't listen
to that thing.
But my ambition
is the best part of me.
No, the best part of you
is your heart.
[sigil]
Hear and obey me.
Your name will live forever.
-[stutters]
-You wished to bless this family
-because you wanted
to be remembered.
-[gentle music]
And I have been
thanks to the sigil.
My entire life has been devoted
-to the needs of this family
and preserving its memories.
-I know.
I can barely remember
the name I was born with.
The years do pile on,
don't they?
I became an Auldcraft
when I married your grandson.
Which was wonderful.
Make me proud of that name,
Richard, like you always do.
Victoria, I just can't do it.
Not even for you.
Well, here we are.
The final choice.
Are you motivated by love
or by the past?
You must choose at last.
[sigil]
I have so much more
to give you, Richard.
This house, the family party,
Mary, an amuse bouche
before every feast.
And yes, your picture
can be on the money.
Choose now, and forever.
[exclaims]
Seymour, huh.
We're going to need a bell.
-[sighs in relief]
-I started the ritual
by ringing a bell
to toll for the dead.
I, I've got an app for that.
That won't work with
the Spirit World. It's digital.
Jeez, get with the times,
Spirit World.
-I have a bell.
-[bell rings]
Perfect.
Then I snuffed a candle.
Gee, what did the candle
ever do to you?
Done.
And then I signed my name
in a book and I closed it.
-Which book?
-[thunder rumbling]
[Seymour]
It's Jack.
We don't have a lot of time.
I don't remember. Uh--
It, it, it was the one
about the family history,
the Auldcraft family history,
um, of births,
uh, deaths, marriages.
[stutters] It has
to be here somewhere.
Start with the As.
[Gerald]
Take your time.
Let's have some tea.
Don't mock tea.
Births, death, marriages?
I know the book.
Richard, I still
don't understand
why you refused to record
Seymour's birth.
Seymour, uh--
The-- The other side
of the blanket and all that.
I was never able to write
your name in it, Seymour.
That's why your name
isn't on the sigil.
Lucky for us.
'Cause this night
is going so well.
So to reverse the ritual,
you'd have to light the candle,
open the book and ring a bell.
To toll for the dead.
[thunder rumbling]
No, that's not all.
There has to be
a binding phrase.
Um, how about, "'Round
the fang, through the gums,
-look out Heaven,
here he comes"?
-[Seymour] Richard.
What did you say
at the end of the ritual?
Uh, it's, it's, it's,
it's on the tip of my tongue.
[thunder rumbling]
Say the binding phrase, Richard.
[stutters] Don't rush me.
I said it's
on the tip of my tongue.
We really should make haste.
Oh, oh, oh.
I have it, I have it.
All right. Then it's time
for one last family activity.
Say the binding phrase, Richard.
Here it goes.
To lift the sigil from the land,
use ghostly prayer
in unwrit hand.
Uh, the bad portrait
didn't give you a tip off
that it was a demon?
Well, I was excited about
the thought of immortality.
I didn't judge the syntax.
How can you have
unwritten handwriting?
It's just paranormal
prittle-prattle.
It doesn't mean anything.
Is that your opinion,
or the angel with scales?
Both of ours. We were trying
to end the ceremony early.
We had previous engagements.
Oh, Richard,
you are truly one of a kind.
Oh, thank you.
All right.
Say the words, Richard.
All right, don't shout.
The dead shall stay
to the end of time.
The fallen shall rise at the,
the final time... [mumbles]
-What does it mean?
-[thunder rumbling]
[music intensifies]
It means that
if we don't destroy this thing
by the end of midnight,
-we're screwed.
-[gasps]
Lily, I need you by my side.
You don't have to say that
'cause that's
where I already am.
I have to light the candle.
-[thunder rumbling]
-[Victoria whimpers]
It's resisting!
Not enough magic bubble bath.
Let me try.
Lily. No, it's,
it's too powerful.
[sigil]
Auldcrafts!
Are you okay?
On my signal.
One, two, three!
[Seymour]
We're almost there.
Yeah, we have to open the book.
I'm not strong enough.
There's ghostly prayer
in unwrit hand,
"Seymour" name is unwritten,
and I'm a ghost.
Together. Seymour,
we must open the book together.
Hey, it's almost midnight.
Victoria, ring the bell.
No!
-We're doomed.
-We're out of time.
[sigil]
The fallen will rise
at the final charge.
[Lily]
Oh, no. No.
[sigil]
The fallen will rise.
The fallen, arise!
Auldcraft, beware my wrath!
This thing doesn't want to
hand out trick-or-treat candy.
Seymour.
Seymour!
It's absorbing my power.
-[growls]
-Of course,
church bells ring
at midnight on All Hallows' Eve.
To toll for the dead!
Now, Richard!
I am revoking the contract!
[demon growls]
[gasps]
Can I open my eyes now?
Is this over?
[thunder rumbling]
[grunts] One last throat
for old time's sake.
-Hey, Jack.
-What?
Go to hell.
[music increases]
The sigil and me had a deal.
[echoing] A deal!
Now is it truly over?
Uh, yes. [pants]
Jack is gone.
The sigil is destroyed.
And we aren't bound
to this plane any longer.
Then, now boarding to...
[heavenly chime]
-[Victoria] Oh!
-What is that?
Oh!
It's warmth!
-[celestial music]
-I-- I had forgotten
what warmth felt like.
That, my dears,
is the other side.
I shall retreat. The family
will need a head count.
Um...
They don't all have heads.
Oh, Richard.
Allow me.
[exhales] Everyone,
please adjourn to the cemetery.
This year
the party continues upstairs.
Oh.
Lily, I'm pleased
to introduce you
to over 200 years of Auldcrafts.
-Oh. [chuckles]
-Bye, Mom.
Dad, see you in a minute.
[Lily]
Whoa!
[Richard]
Everyone... [clears throat]
...attention on me, please.
-Yes, Richard.
-[sighs]
-[sentimental orchestral music]
-Tonight was
an extraordinary night.
And I confess that I see things
in a different light,
literally. [laughs]
And... [clears throat]
I apologize
if my actions were
a little less than convenient.
-[chuckles softly]
-Less than?
-Look--
-Apology accepted.
And thank you
for making it, Richard.
Seymour.
I'm sorry. I... I misjudged you.
That's fine.
We're in different generations,
-like 200 years or so.
-All right.
You're forgiven.
I guess we all signed contracts
without seeing the devil in
the details every now and then.
I suppose I should follow them.
You know, I shouldn't think
that paradise should compare to
all this.
Richard, if the worst
you have to worry about
is lack of control,
it will be a very nice
afterlife, after all.
Indeed. [clears throat]
Well, I... I should hurry up.
Humility is not
my finest quality.
[whooshing]
I shall be next.
Seymour,
you make me proud
to be an Auldcraft.
Thank you.
Oh, I have a superior
final thought this time.
It's all right to be sentimental
as long as you are in love.
-Bye, Victoria...
-[sighs]
...I'll miss you.
Remember us, Seymour.
I hope that whatever's beyond
the great beyond,
there's a lovely cup of tea.
[whooshing]
My turn.
Mom.
You don't have to say anything.
You're a wonderful son,
and you've made me very proud.
But if you don't marry
that girl,
I promise I will find a way
to haunt you.
Yeah.
My love to both of you,
depend on it.
Love you too, Mom.
[whooshing]
My turn.
-Oh.
-[cork pops]
Right.
Drink in front of me.
That'll make me feel better.
Just hang in there, Gerald.
[chuckles]
[laughs]
What?
That's impossible,
you know that.
Take it. Come on, try.
[magical chime]
[laughs]
Hey, look at that.
Seymour, how'd you do that?
I am amazing.
Well, are you going to drink?
You don't have to tell me twice.
[clears throat]
To the Auldcraft family.
I believe I...
speak for everyone
when I say...
...what the hell was that?
Oh, wow.
Oh, twice as smooth
when you're dead.
[laughs]
Nephew...
...you are, without a doubt,
the best bartender ever.
-[chuckles]
-Ready for the golden light now?
[clicks tongue]
All right, all right. Um...
I am a one for the road
kind of guy.
It's going to be a long--
Gerald.
Oh, I love you two.
[sighs] And I better
not see you again
for a long, long time.
[music intensifies]
But when we do...
...it's going to be
one heck of a happy hour.
[whooshing]
[both sigh]
They're all gone.
All gone.
Are you sure?
-I mean, I'm sure.
-[music fades]
Well, the house
doesn't seem so scary now
-without these vortexes of doom.
-You bet.
It hasn't been this empty in
over 200 years.
-It's kind of boring.
-[scoffs]
Come on, we could use
a lifetime of boring
-at this point.
-Point.
-[sighs]
-So, what are we going to do
with this mansion?
Well, look at the place.
Obviously, we're going
to keep it.
Kind of a perfect place
to have my wedding.
-[mellow music]
-Seymour Edwin Auldcraft,
-are you finally
proposing to me?
-[chuckles]
-[gasps]
-I mean, somebody has
to keep the lineage going.
I mean, this place
just screams...
Family!
-[gentle orchestral music]
-[Lily sighs]
We have a lot of planning to do.
There is definitely
an app for that. [chuckles]
[gasps]
[whooshing]
[child giggles]
Auldcrafts, rest in peace.
[orchestral music continues]
[orchestral music continues]
[music ends]
Ghost Party (2022)
Moderator: Maskath3