01x02 - Big Ball Energy

[bunniefuu]

Whoa!

This is wild!

Nope, this is "Wipeout."
Oh.

The Big Balls are back,
America.

I’m Nicole Byer.

And I’m John Cena.

We’ll be your guides
as we reintroduce you

to the most insane
competition show

known to man.

She got hit hard.

That’s the game of "Wipeout."

Banzai!

Each week, teams of two
will enter

our wild, crazy
Qualifier course.

Oh.

Ooh!

That was crazy.

The six teams
with the best times

will move on to the
phrenetic freeforall

known as the Gauntlet.

Oh,!

And finally,
the fastest two teams

will go headtohead
in an epic battle

to conquer the most
challenging Wipeout Zone

in history.

This is the greatest thing
I’ve ever seen

in my entire life!
Yeah!

Two teams enter,
but only one will win

the cool $25,000 prize.

And speaking of strong duos,
America,

I mean, just look at us.

Come on, America.

I mean, seriously.
Yeah.

Really, what else do you need?

Yes!

Ooh.
Yeah!

Wipeout!

Oh, no. No.
Wait

People falling down
is therapeutic.

both: Welcome back, America,
to "Wipeout"!

Hello, America,
and welcome to "Wipeout,"

a show featuring the
biggest balls you’ve ever seen.

Speak for yourself, John.

I’m Nicole Byer.

And I’m John Cena.

We’ve got
a whole new batch of teams

who have come to play today
and are vying

for that $25,000 grand prize.

Ooh, what would you do
with an extra $25,000

burning a hole in your pocket?

Trick question, Nicole.

I don’t wear pockets.

Doesn’t fit in my sock,
it’s not worth my time.

10 teams face the Qualifier
today,

a fivepart
obstacle course behemoth.

First up, players log on
to Ballsy’s social media page

at the Spanker Planks.

Then scramble
over the Tosser Tumblers

while avoiding getting tagged
by our influencers.

Next up, a "Wipeout"
the Big Balls.

Make it across and grab
Smallsy for a $250 bonus.

After that,
it’s the Body Blender.

Jump the hurdles, or get
cut down in the process.

Finally, the players end

with the swinging
and swaying Jigglelator,

for a final leap
to the finish platform.

The six fastest teams
to finish the Qualifier

make it through
to the next round.

How’s the course
looking down there, Camille?

Nicole, will you please
tell Mr. Cena

that the course is amazing,
the contestants are fired up,

and that if you invite
a friend to dinner,

to please not ask them
to split the check.

Ugh.
Uh, John, Camille says

Oh, here we go.

Will you tell Ms. Kostek
that I only carry cash,

and I wasn’t expecting her
to order two entrees?

It was shrimpathon.

Shrimp for now,
shrimp for later.

What did you expect?

Wait, hold up,
hold up, hold up.

You guys went to
a shrimpathon without me?

I assumed you were busy

I am never too busy for
a shrimpathon, John Cena.

Come on!
Okay.

Maybe we should head
to the top of the course.

Good idea.

both: Let’s go!

This is Sam and Christina.

They’re coworkers
who love to get down.

yeah, baby!
Let’s go!

Eye on the prize!
Eye on the prize!

Oh,!
Let’s go!

I’m Samantha.
I’m Christina.

We are trainers together.
We work at the same gym.

I’m also
a professional dancer.

I, on the other hand, am not
a classicallytrained dancer.

Um, but I do have moves.

She’s a little afraid
of heights.

I’m terrified,

but the goal is to just
eye on the prize

and just don’t even think
about it,

and blaze through them, so...

Jesus, take the wheel.

Sam, one, two, stepping up
to the Spanker Plank.

Ooh!

That sucked!

Is it just me, or do these
girls have some dirty mouths?

, please.

After that wipeout,
Sam got dirty everything.

Don’t call me a.

Then don’t be

Uhoh!

I accidently changed the
setting on the bleep button.

Yeah, literal

Got to fix that thing.
Trying!

Ooh. Poop emoji.

I have to get over this?

Just pretend
you’re working the pole.

I don’t think they’re
those kind of dancers.

Terrible.

She just slid into our DMs.

Our deep mud.
God!

Christina boogies up
onto the Big Balls...

Gets a little nudge
from the Motivator, and...

does the falling man.

Oh, that’s terrible.

The Motivator doesn’t put up
with bad language,

so it decided to wash
Christina’s mouth out.

Dirty Mouth Dancer Sam
about to do the Jigglelator.

Over. Over. Over.

Yes!

Bike horn.

We’re getting closer.

My God!
Are you

Oh! Stop it!

We will once you make it
to the finish platform.

Poor girl.

Speed it up.

On the
Whoohoo!

Make that jump!
No, this is impossible.

Oh! Would you knock it off?

She knows this thing
is timed, right?

I can’t do it.
I’m terrified of heights.

John, I think she might
be afraid of heights.

Really?
What gave you that impression?

She’s a little afraid
of heights.

I’m terrified.

I’m terrified.

Terrified.

Terrified.

She’s a little afraid
of heights.

I can’t do it.
I’m terrified of heights.

I don’t know.
Just a hunch.

Come on!
Go for it!

I can’t.

Clock’s almost
at eight minutes.

And if Sam ever jumps,

they may still have a chance
of moving on to the Gauntlet,

but I’m hearing Sam’s not the
only one stuck on an obstacle.

Hey there, boy.
Help me!

Oh no, John!

Chef Smallsy’s in trouble.

Luckily, we’ve got
a pair of lifeguards

running in for the rescue.

Help me!
I ate so many croque madames.

Don’t worry, Smallsy.
Help is on the way.

Lifeguard Shane approaches
the Big Balls.

All right, Smallsy.
I’m coming for you.

Get it, Shane! Go!

Oh, no.

Nice job.
Nice job.

They just earned $250

for knocking Smallsy
into the water,

which seems counterintuitive
for lifeguards.

Hasselhoff is spinning
in his grave.

I’m pretty sure
the Hoff is still alive.

He took my order at
the Coffee Bean this morning.

Ah, it doesn’t matter.

At two minutes and 30 seconds
and counting,

the Lifeguards are absolutely
tearing through the course.

I’d be surprised
if we didn’t see them

swimming on to the Gauntlet.

Now, head over
to the top of the course,

where newlyweds,
Brian and Nancy,

are approaching
Ballsy’s social media page,

which is the perfect space
for taking wedding photos.

She leaps down the aisle.

Ooh!
Oh!

Great action sh*t
for the online wedding album.

Remember, Nancy.

Until you post about it
on social media,

you’re not actually married.

Go Brian!
Honey, you got this!

I know they’re newlyweds,

but as Brian approaches
the Jigglelator,

it’s kind of cute to see
Nancy’s still enjoying

the honeymoon period.

Ugh!
Talk about terrible timing.

Yuck!
Exactly.

Brian down on both knees,
andooh.

Whoa! What?

The honeymoon gets cut
short.

Wow!
He was like a propeller.

Get to the chopper.

And with that, Wipeout
Wedding comes in at a time

of 9 minutes and 30 seconds.

I love love!

Well, lucky for Camille,
the Wipeout Qualifier

is made for couples.

Will you be my girlfriend?

We’ll see how this goes!
Yikes!

Any other answer than yes
is a hard no.

Oh, snap.

You know, John, going on
national TV, asking someone

to be your girlfriend
takes some pretty big balls.

You mean like these?

Oh!

Maybe she’s just one of
those girls who won’t commit

till you give her ring.

Ow!
Ooh.

Our next couple tied the knot
after this former combat medic

fell head over heels in love.

both: Oh!

That had to hurt.

Yeah, that had to hurt.

Ouch.

Love sometimes
just knocks you around

and turns you into a hot mess.

How you doing?
Terrible.

But John, there’s one thing

our course and being in love
really have in common

they both make people
projectile vomit.

Was that him or us?

Neither.
It’s love.

Okay, but that’s him.

both: Oh!

Ouch. Wowuzz.

You’re almost there.

There it is!

You think you’re good
for an interview?

Or you need another...

’cause if you projectile on me,
I will not be able to...

Sorry.

I need a second.

I do not do well
when people are puking.

And I saw it.

In the trash can.

Plenty more wipeouts
and probably

the expulsion of more
bodily fluids to come.

Ooh!

I do love Red Lobster.

Have you ever had
cheddar bay biscuits?

Never been to a Red Lobster.

That’s crazy!

Never been.

Oh, it’s
Black people’s fine dining.

Welcome back to "Wipeout,"
America.

Five teams have taken on
today’s Qualifier,

with five more waiting
in the wings.

Let’s check in with Camille,
who’s with our next team.

What do you guys do?

We’re radio producers
for a radio station,

a radio show called
the "Heidi and Frank Show,"

on 95.5 KLOS in Los Angeles.

What’s going on,
Heidi and Frank?

Yeah!

So whose idea was it
to come on "Wipeout"?

Frank.
He heard about the tryouts.

And he was like,
"You two should get out there

and try out for this."

Damn you, Frank!
Yeah.

You know, I always thought
I could have had a career

in morning radio.

So Frank,
if you’re listening...

Coming at you, bringing you all
the thrills, spills, and chills

the "Wipeout" Qualifier
has to offer,

I’m the muscle man with a plan.
I’m Johnny C.

And with me, as always,

Cuhrazy B!

That B better stand
for Byer,

Johnny C!

Sammy Moreno,
looking for some airtime.

Oh!
Ooh!

Gets her dial turned.

If she didn’t have a face
for radio before,

she definitely does now.

Zipzapping ahead
of the Jigglelator,

the Iceman seems
to be struggling.

Why did I drink so much
yesterday?

You can’t drink before this!

That’s right, Camille.
You should drink during.

Like us!

Oh!
Go, go, go.

You’re almost done.
You’re almost done.

Ohoh!

And Johnny Ice makes his way
to the end of the course,

what do you think
of their performance today?

Well, I was talking to
some of the guys in the back

oohand they said,

chances of Moreno and Ice
moving on

are 0.0.

Remind me who signed you up
for this.

Frank.

Any words to say to Frank?

I hate you!

I hate you...

and I quit.

Go yourself.

Okay. I gotta
get out of this

before I receive any more
fines from the FCC.

Bababooey!

both:
Let’s solve this course.

Welcome to tonight’s episode
of "CSI: Wipeout."

I’m Kirk.
I’m Christy.

I’m actually Kirk’s boss,

and I’m training
in firearms identification.

So prior to going
to the firearms unit,

I worked in the DNA unit,
and

so I had to look for a lot
of blood and semen stains.

One of the examinations
in DNA,

you touch it
with your bare finger

to see what kind of
bodily fluid stain it is.

You’re looking for crusties.

With our brains
over our brawn,

we’re gonna use our intellect
to make it to the Wipeout Zone.

Yeahyeah!

Get some!

Go, Kirk!

Forensic trainee, Kirk,
searching for all the clues

at the Spanker Plank.

And he makes it across!

Whoo!

Not a very
thorough examiner,

but at least he’s fast.

He goes in g*ns blazing
to the Tosser Tumbler,

andooh!

Leaves his DNA
all over the bar.

Sounds like my perfect
Saturday night.

Forensic trainer, Christy,
ready to run ballistics

at the Big Balls.

One. Two. Three. Four.
Good job

Oohhoo!
Well, she made it to two.

You got it.

While Christy continues
collecting samples

to send back to the lab

She’s not gonna like
the results

of what’s in that water, John.

Trust me.

Let’s catch up with personal
trainers, Kyrell and Nita,

at the Body Blender.
Ooh!

Looks like we’ve got
a couple of hard bodies.

My favorite kind.

Kyrell and Nita,
you can definitely tell

they’ve been training
for a living.

They are cruising
through this course.

I’ll say.

According to my watch,
they’re currently vying

for fastest time of the day.

Ooh!

360 twist landing.

His body may be hard,
but look at that hair.

All nice and soft.

Let’s shave it off
so I can turn it into a doll.

You’re weird.
Yes.

Team Hard Body Kyrell and
Nita tore through the course,

coming in at 5 minutes
and 13 seconds.

That is the fastest time
so far today.

But we’ve got one team left
to go.

A pair of "Wipeout" legacies,
if you will.

Their mom and brother
came up short

in the Wipeout Zone in 2011,

and they’re here
to finish the job.

"Wipeout" Legacy Crystal
about to take on

the only obstacle remaining

from her family’s time
on the show.

Well, you gotta think!
But don’t think too much!

Girl’s got big balls
in her blood, John.

Look at her go!

Takes a seat on the
fourth ball with Smallsy

and picks up an extra $250.

That’s my sister!

I’m Brenna.
And I’m Crystal.

We are Wipeout Legacies.

Back in the day,

our mom and brother
were on "Wipeout."

But they didn’t bring home
the win, so you know what?

We gotta finish
what they started.

Business.

That’s what we’re here to do.
Yep.

We have been preparing for
this moment our whole lives.

Built obstacles courses
in our backyard, in our pool.

This is not just for us.

It’s bigger than us!

It’s game time.

We’re gonna win "Wipeout."

both: It’s our legacy.

Crystal can’t bear to watch
as her sister Brenna

takes on the Body Blender.

Brenna jumps through,
but gets caught in the ring.

Grabs on, and

aw, can’t get a handle
on the platform.

Let me just roll
that footage back to there.

Yes. Nicole’s Meme of the Day
right there.

And then, me remembering
that John has never been

to a Red Lobster.

The kids from the internet
are gonna love this.

What happened?

I don’t know.
Don’t do what I did.

Come classic sisterly advice

Crystal is most likely
not gonna follow.

We’ll see about that.

She’s almost through the ring,

and on to the platform, and

does the exact same thing
Brenna did.

I thought you saw
what I did!

The whole point
of me going first

was so you could see

what not to do!

This is sisterly love,
it sounds like.

Be quiet!

Conserve your energy.

Yeah.
No, you’re right.

All right. Pressure’s on.
Their family’s watching.

Keep up with the family legacy.

Crystal,

the last thing pops out
from nowhere!

Yes.
She’s passed it.

Wow, she actually listened
to her sister this time.

Let’s go!

Make that jump.
Come on!

Crystal leaps...

right into the water.
What the heck?

John, if they hurry up,
they can still make it

to the next round.
Swim!

Swim.
Swim! Swim!

Crystal is out of the water
and onto that finish platform.

But John, did they make it
in time?

This just in: you’re
moving on the Gauntlet!

Yas!

The Wipeout Legacies are
advancing to the Gauntlet.

Joining them will be two teams
with nearly identical,

blazing fast,
fiveminute runs

Team Hard Body
and the Lifeguards.

Also moving on are
the Forensic Scientists,

Dirty Mouth Dancers,
and Wipeout Wedding.

Save the date
for moments from now,

as heat one of the Gauntlet
is coming up.

Let’s not even show
the contestants.

Let’s just show us.

"Wipeout" is just Nicole
and John having fun.

Welcome back to "Wipeout,"
America.

I’m John Cena, with the
evertalkative Nicole Byer.

"Evertalkative"? What the
hell’s that supposed to mean?

Just means you always
have something to say.

Sometimes.

Well, I wasn’t
gonna mention this,

but since I’ve got a big mouth,

I’m just gonna, like,
go ahead and say it.

You’re the reason why
I never start the show on time.

Oh, come on!

You know I work out
before the sh**t.

This body doesn’t happen
overnight.

It also doesn’t happen
by taking shirtless selfies

in the gym mirror
for 45 minutes.

It’s not 45 minutes!

Oh, I’m just messing
with you, John.

Just like we’re about to mess
with the six remaining teams

as they take on the Gauntlet.

The Gauntlet will be done
in two heats.

Each heatthree teams,
competing at the same time

will be practically climbing
over one another,

starting at the CarousHell.

Then it’s a foot race

through the disgusting mud
pits and slippery slopes

of the Messy Mile.

And finally,
the Pummel Pool,

where the choice between
the revolving French fries

and the giant
spinning lollipop

could make
or break it all.

The first team to have both
members cross the finish line

moves on to the Wipeout Zone.

One spot in the Wipeout Zone
on the line.

Let’s head down
to the course.

Coming up in the first heat
is the Dirty Mouth Dancers.

The Lifeguards.

And the Forensic Scientists.

Bigthey’re like,
"I can’t use that."

You guys, congratulations on
qualifying for the Gauntlet.

Are you ready?

all: Whoo!

Three. Two. One.

There’s the horn.

The contestants have entered
the Gauntlet.

Good luck, guys.

Good luck.
You’re number one.

Lifeguard Shane. Ooh.
First in the pool.

Makes sense.

I’m not going. I’m
gonna wait for the last one.

Dirty Mouth Sam
hasn’t gotten over

her fear of heights

and is pooping her
purple pants right now.

Ow!

Oh, my body’s screaming
"no."

Forensic trainee Kirk...

Let’s give it a sh*t.

Left a little too late and
missed his target completely.

I just need to breathe.
Ready?

Yeah. Hold on.
I’m just gonna breathe.

Dirty Mouth Dancer Sam
is working up the courage

to face her fears.
She’s got this.

No way.
Oh, will someone

just push me?
Come on, Nicole.

This is her one sh*t.
Her one opportunity.

This is the moment where Sam
looks deep inside herself,

throws caution to the wind,

finds out what she’s really
made of.

Can’t. I can’t do it.

Told ya.
Also, I’m all of a sudden

really hungry
for Mom’s spaghetti.

I’ll go.
One of you guys go.

All right, you’re next.

Lifeguard Shane dives on.
Oh my God!

He makes it across
and shows the others

that anything is possible.

You made that look so easy!
It can be done.

And he’s wasting no time
as he grabs on to a ring.

And holds on tight.

Gets his knees
on the finish platform,

and the first member
of the pink team

has made it through
the CarousHell.

Let’s go.
Dirty Mouth Dancer Christina

on to the sweeper.
Ah, yes.

Please. Please.
Please. Please.

John, she’s really toning
down her language.

Wonder if
that’s a new strategy.

Holy!

Guess not.
I did it.

That means
I have to go. Okay.

I’m gonna give it a sh*t.

Okay.
Yeah.

Forensic trainee Kirk,
in yellow,

makes it onto
the sweeper this time

and lands on the platform.

I’m frozen in fear.
Damn it.

Dirty Mouth Christina
holds on...

and lands safely
on the platform.

Holy!

My body literally
won’t let me do it.

But if she wants to move on,

Sam will have to get over
her fear of heights

and join Christina
at the CarousHell’s exit.

Sam, you gotta go for it.
You got it, baby.

Okay, you got it.

She’s inching forward.

Go!
And John, I can’t

believe itshe’s on.

Yes! Yes! Go!

She drops and gets low.
Watch it. Watch it.

Ohho!
Yeah, Sam.

Keep it up. Keep it up.

Dirty Mouth Dancer Sam
grabs onto the bar.

I’m proud of her, John.

Let’s go, baby. Let it
take you, let it take you.

She gets spun around.

She’s got
one foot on the platform.

And she makes it!
Yes! Let’s go!

you!

You can’t do that!
Let’s go. Let’s go.

Come on. Come on.

Take the pink ring here.
It’s the easier.

Okay. What do I do now?

Well, you just hold on.

Really, Lifeguard Shane?
Just hold on?

What’s your advice
when you save someone:

Just don’t drown?

Kira takes the obvious
advice

all the way to the beach.

The Lifeguards are moving
on and need to move fast

if they want to catch up
with the purple team.

This sucks.

But they’re not the only
ones

with a chance to catch up.

The Forensic Scientists
just made it through

the CarousHell.

We’ve got all three teams
in the Messy Mile.

Here we go.

Kira, let’s go.

Uhh

That was right in the ear.

The taste analysis
isn’t good.

Up ahead, the Dirty Mouth
Dancers’ lead

has grown smaller, and Sam
is facing her fears again

as she climbs 30 feet up
to the mountain’s peak.

Don’t hesitate.
Get it done.

Sam slowly climbs over,
faces her fears...

and drops into
the Pummel Pool

with her partner
following suit.

Good for her. Took
the jump, no hesitation.

But say goodbye to that
lead, girls,

’cause there’s a traffic
jam on Mt. Wipeout.

Well, I hope they at least
brought a good podcast

to listen to.

Christy and Kirk,
Shane and Kira

they are all scaling
Mt. Wipeout,

coming up to
Sam and Christina.

Anybody’s game!

With all four at the
mountaintop,

Shane shows no hesitation

and leads the rest
of the contestants

into the Pummel Pool.

This is a Gauntlet,
my friends.

Dirty Mouth Dancer Sam
is giving it a go.

You’re there.
Yes.

Ooh, here it comes,
and you’ll go headfirst.

Straight on.
Yes. Yes.

John, these ladies
may pull this off yet.

Let’s go.

What is this?

But the party is just
getting started

for Lifeguard Shane
as he slips and slides

across the first stage
of the Pummel Pool.

How’d you do that?

Lifeguard Shane has gone
the lollipop route.

Camille, what’s your take
on going lollipop

versus French fries?

Whoa, I just did one spin
and I’m dizzy.

Great analysis as always.

Lifeguard Shane has now
pulled himself up

and takes off flying,
but may have overshot.

No!
Whoo! What the heck?!

Shane, on to the Big Ball
and over.

He’s the first to
complete the Gauntlet.

That boy can rescue
me anytime.

He’s just got to wait for
his partner Kira to join him,

and they’ll be moving on
to the Wipeout Zone.

Well, she better hurry
the hell up,

because both Forensic
Scientists have made it

past the first Big Ball.

And wasting no time,
Christy goes fries

and makes it look easy.
Wow! Christy!

Yeah!

Christy makes it across
the final Big Ball,

and the Forensic Scientists,
who were behind for so long,

who were the last to get out
of the CarousHell,

who seemingly had no chance

now have a legitimate sh*t at
the Wipeout Zone.

Dirty Mouth Dancer Christina
seizes the opportunity.

On to the lollipop.

Takes a trip around
and makes the leap.

One member from each team has
made it through the Gauntlet.

They just need their
partner,

and they’re going to
the Wipeout Zone.

Good job.
Let’s go!

John, I don’t know what’s
more impressive,

their Wipeout skills
or their ability

to work a swear word into
every other sentence.

Oh, son of a.

It’s gotta be the swearing.

It’s gotta be.

Yeah, Kira!

Lifeguard Kira has finally
made it across,

which lights a fire under
the forensic trainee.

Come on, Kirk!

Kirk’s up and, yes,
sticks the landing.

Samantha! Go!

And with that, the Forensic
Scientists say "case closed"

on the Gauntlet, and they
have a very real sh*t

of getting their fingerprints
all over that $25,000.

Christy, Kirk,
congratulations.

You’re going to straight
to the Wipeout Zone.

And sorry, Sam.
Honey, you’re not.

I hate this.

Heat number two of the
Gauntlet is moments away.

Then the winner
will battle it out

with the Forensic Scientists
in the ultimate test

of skill and strength:
the Wipeout Zone.

Oh! She looks like a huge
pinball.

Chamillionaire.
That’s a rapper’s name, no?

Yeah. Chamillionaire’s
a rapper.

Yes! He wanted everyone to
catch him riding dirty.

We’re back, America.

Oh boy,
it’s like we never left.

The second heat of our
Gauntlet lies ahead.

Vying to join the Forensic
Scientists in the Wipeout Zone

are Team Hard Body.

Remember, keep the elbows
bent, and remember,

you go where your hips go.

Wipeout Legacies.

Stay positive. Don’t scream
at me. Don’t be rude.

No, I’m notI’m not gonna
try to, but, like

But you were last time.
I wasn’t trying to.

And Wipeout Wedding.

I’m just worried about my...

we didn’t want kids
any more anyway, right?

No. We’re good.
We have all our kids.

We do. We’re set on kids.

We have that in common.
I don’t want kids either.

Are you guys ready?

all: Whoo!

Three. Two. One.

There’s the horn,

and heat two of the Gauntlet
has officially begun.

All right, who’s going
first? Kyrell?

Kyrell’s going first.

Hard Body Kyrell
making that look easy.

Oh, he made that look easy.

Literally what I just said.

Groom Brian is on

but won’t let go of
the sweeper bar

and misses the platform.

Dude’s taking
"to have and to hold"

way too literally, John.

Hard Body Kyrell...

Ooh
Doesn’t seem to

have that problem.

There it is.

Oh!
And Brian in green

gets taken out from behind.

That one will get
you every time.

Legacy Brenna...

Nice, Brenna!
Oh my God!

Seems shocked she made it.
Come on, Brenna.

Act like your family’s
been here before.

Kyrell, in orange,
giving it another go.

Ooh! Takes a sweeper
bar hard on the bum.

But hangs on, and he’s
the first to make it

through the CarousHell.

Crystal, in blue, now on
to a sweeper bar,

and hoping to
join her sister.

Yes, Crystal!

She makes to the
first platform.

Oh, my ass!
Ooh, been there, buddy.

You’ll walk funny
for a few days,

but otherwise,
you’ll be fine.

Let’s go.
Legacy Brenna

grabs a ring and takes off.

She’s taking a b*ating
from that sweeper, John.

Stay on! Stay on!

You mean get off! Get off!

Well, she heeds her sister’s
terrible advice

and is coming
around again.

Why? Why? I’m turning
everywhere, Crystal.

Whoa!

Almost takes
out her sister.

She hangs on, mostly avoids
the sweeper,

reaches the platform,
holds on with one hand.

She’s got it.
Yes!

No, she doesn’t.
Aah!

John, what is it
with this girl

and hanging on to the edge
of obstacles

before
ultimately sliding off?

Ooh! Ooh!
And there goes the bride.

You got it. You got it.
Legacy Brenna tries again.

Careful.
Why?

And manages to stay on
the platform this time.

And Hard Body Nita’sooh,

butt seems to be okay.

Ooh, my ass.

But other special parts,
ooh, not so much.

Will Crystal join her sister
on the next platform

and be the first team to move
on to the Messy Mile?

Yes, Crystal! Yeah,
you got it! Yes!

There’s your answer, John.

They’re one step closer
to avenging their family.

Right underneath you.
Time it out.

Try to stepdip down
into it.

Not wanting to fall behind,

Hard Body Kyrell gives his
partner some pointers.

Get to the edge.
Trash that dip.

And it pays off.
Squeeze those legs.

All right, you’re the boss.

I think he meant Nita.
Let me have this, John.

Up ahead, the Wipeout
Legacies are already

more than halfway
through the Messy Mile.

You guys are so mean.

Wait for the swing one.

John, hard Body Nita is
gonna have to make this now,

if they want any sh*t of
catching up.

Lift your legs over
this joint. Legs up.

Follows her teammate’s
instructions,

grabs her leg,
and she makes it.

Kiss. Kiss. Kiss.

No time for loving,

as Team Hard Body has made it
through CarousHell.

Up at Mt. Wipeout,

Brenna and Crystal are
experiencing a sizable lead

and a gentle splash
from our waterfall.

You guys said
a gentle splash.

That’s like
Niagara Falls.

Brenna and Crystal
following up behind

their family’s legacy
in the finals.

Oh, it is refreshing.

Team Hard Body has already
made it to the zip line.

Kyrell takes off,
and he makes it.

His ass must be okay, John.
No one ever makes that jump.

We may have a serious horse
race on our hands.

The Wipeout Legacies are
holding the lead for now,

as Brenna...
Fast, like a ninja.

I’m like a ninja.
Psyches herself up.

Short hops the Big Ball,
trips,

and faceplants at the
end of the tibby table.

You’re not a ninja, Brenna.
Don’t try to be like a ninja.

You think they’ve had this

ninja conversation before,
John?

God, so many times.
Back at CarousHell.

You got this, baby.

I know. I got you.

You got me.
You got the course.

Whoa, Brian. The Gauntlet
is definitely not into

polyamorous relationships.
Believe me. I’ve tried.

Nancy makes
the leap this time.

Maybe a little reassurance
was all she needed

to make it to
theoh!the water.

Brian hasn’t looked this
disappointed

since Nancy said no to a
"Tiger King"themed wedding.

Kyrell and Nita
are scaling Mt. Wipeout.

Hey, stay pressed
against it. Head down.

Sexy strategy, Kyrell.
But will it be enough?

I don’t know, Nicole.
It looks like

Brenna’s already made it past
the first Big Ball

of the Pummel Pool and
Crystal’s about to join her.

Hey, is that a dog?
And a man on a horse?

Nicole, focus.
Crystal leaps.

Slides.

And makes it.
That’s my sister!

Now they must strategically
choose between

the fries
and the lollipop.

This is for Crystal.
Sister power! Unite!

Brenna takes the fries.

Slides forward,
but she doesn’t stop,

and makes it across.

Fast like a ninja.
I’m like a ninja.

She’s up on the ball,
slips, stays on

Fast like a ninja.
I’m like a ninja.

This is our legacy.
This is for our mom.

Fast like a ninja.
Right here, right now.

I’m like a ninja.
This is for our mom.

Fast like a ninja.

And yes.
There it is.

There it is.
One sister is in.

And not a moment too soon,

as Team Hard Body has just
made it to the Pummel Pool.

You got it, Crystal.
Stay focused.

Crystal trying the fries.

Tiptoes across,
and she’s got it.

Yes! Yes!

Yes! Oh my God! Oh my God!
Oh my God! Oh my God!

Yes!
This is it.

Yes!
Oh, they’re gonna go

all the way.
Don’t make meI will.

This is wild.

Come on!

This is it, Nicole.

Crystal makes the jump, and
the Wipeout Legacies

are gonna have a chance
to finish

what their family started.

After two grueling
Gauntlets,

it’ll be
the Wipeout Legacies

taking on
the Forensic Scientists

in a battle
for the $25,000.

The stage is set for one hell
of a Wipeout Zone.

For science!

Welcome back to "Wipeout."

I’m John Cena, and I didn’t
want to have to

tell you like this,
but I’m your real dad.

John, what the hell
are you talking about?

It wasn’t for you, Nicole.
That was for

a very confused
child out there

whose day just got
a little bit brighter.

You got to work that stuff
out on your own time, John.

We’re in the Wipeout Zone.
Two teams remain.

The winning team
will take home $25,000.

Let’s see what
they’re up against.

I love you.
Stop it!

Goodness.

We’ve made it to the top of
the mountain:

the Wipeout Zone.

This colossal course is
made up of four stages,

done relaystyle,
with each contestant

attempting two obstacles.

The first team member
will get sh*t out

from our speeding
Silver b*llet

into freezing
cold waters below.

From there, they’ll swim to
the giant spinning Vertigo,

where they’ll attempt to
maneuver from peg to peg

without losing their grip
or their lunch.

They’ll need to press
the button

in the middle
to lower the bridge

before
they can leap to safety.

That’s when they’ll tag
their partner

to take on the Leap of Faith

where they’ll have to launch
themselves onto

one of the spinning arms,
maintain their balance,

and jump to the narrow
platform on the other side.

It’s tough. But if they
successfully make it across,

they’ll arrive at
the final challenge:

The Triple thr*at.

If a contestant
can somehow make it

from one spinning
hexagon to the next

and safely
leap to the final platform

faster than their competition,

they’ll take home $25,000.

In tonight’s Wipeout Zone,
we’ve got the Wipeout Legacies

facing off against
the Forensic Scientists.

The Legacies are up first,

and Crystal gets loaded into
the Silver b*llet

for her leg of the relay

as the usually very vocal
Brenna anxiety watches on.

Three. Two. One.

Ooh.
Nice landing.

Good splash.

Let’s go, Crystal.
You got it. You got it.

They are secondgeneration
"Wipeout" athletes.

Yes.
Ten years ago, their mom

and brother failed here
at the Wipeout Zone.

I hope this isn’t history
repeating itself.

Could be.
But we don’t want that.

We want change.

That’s what we want
a little change.

Crystal jumps and makes it
onto one of the pegs.

She’s in a very interesting
position.

One we haven’t seen.

I don’t know how to
get to the middle.

You have to stand
on the peg.

I like it.

Um, it’s a choice.

Hold on to a peg,
just like you’re

Right there.
Whoop!

Crystal’s making moves.

Ooh, she upsidedown.

Oh my gosh.
No...

No, no, no, no.
She gone.

She was completely
upsidedown

and now
completely submerged.

You gotta feel for it now.

You know, I’ve heard that
they build obstacle courses

in their backyard.
Wow!

I guess they did not
build anything

as hard as this one.
Zoops.

And there she goes.

She is going for it.

Really going for it.
Yep.

That’s what I like to see.

I like to see people
coming in hot,

making hard choices,
and taking big chances.

I think she’s in the middle.
Yes.

Hits the button.
Yes.

Okay, the gate is down.
All she has to do

is make it back
to the edge.

Yes. Ooh, okay. Okay.

She’s upsidedown.
Yeah. Fully.

And now, on the Vertigo,
she

Oh, boy.
Oh, boy.

Oh, look at her. Nice save.
Wow!

Brilliant recovery.
That was a beautiful save.

And she’s in an okay
position to leap to safety.

She’s gonna go in the water.

But Crystal’s straddling
’cause she’s gonna try it.

Ooh. Yes!
And she held on.

Okay.
All right.

All right.
A fired up Brenna

to the Leap of Faith.
Brenna.

Now, in the Leap of Faith,
she’s gotwhoa, she

she had a little too much
faith in that leap.

Just a little
too much. Yeah.

If you don’t time the jumps
correctly,

Lake Wipeout’s
waiting for you.

All right. All right.

Brenna on her second
attempt now.

Ooh!
Ooh.

Okay.
She hesitated,

but still made it.
Okay.

And holds on to
the platform.

Great job.
Okay.

Thank you.
Okay.

Doing for that legacy
"Wipeout" class,

her mom and her brother.
Yes.

All right, Brenna.
Here we go. One more to go.

The Triple thr*at, and then
you’re to the finish platform.

Yeah, baby.
Here we go.

Yes.

So, a lot of competitors,
not until their first jump

do they realize
that the two parts

are spinning
separate ways.

Yes. Uhhuh.
And each obstacle

on the Triple thr*at
has that sort of motion.

She’s on to the third one.
Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.

All you gotta do is make it

to that finish platform.
Yes.

You got this.
One leap away...

Yes. Yes. Yes.

From 25,000
Yes!

Yes! And she makes it!
Brenna, great job!

Yes!
Great job!

That’s was lovely.
Excellent job. Great job.

Very lovely. Ooh.
You’re so beautiful.

I am? Thank you.

That was awesome!
Good job!

Ladies, is there anything
you want to say to your mom

and your bro?

I hope we made you proud.
We did it!

Thank you.
Congratulations. Great job.

Mom, love you.
Oh my goodness.

The Wipeout Legacies
complete the Wipeout Zone

in 13 minutes
and 45 seconds.

But this competition
is far from over.

Up next, we got a couple
of Forensic Scientists

hoping to solve the case
for the $25,000.

Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today

Welcome back to "Wipeout,"

where someone is
going home with $25,000.

Who’s it gonna be?
And are they single?

What? I’m open
for business, John,

and it’d be nice
to find me a man

with some prize money
of his own.

All right. Well, when you
put it like that,

I’ll ask around for you.
Thanks, John.

You’re the
best wingman I know.

Let’s go back
to the Wipeout Zone.

13 minutes and 45 seconds
is the time to b*at,

set by
the Wipeout Legacies,

meaning
the Forensic Scientists

have their work
cut out for them

if they want
to take home the $25,000.

Christy’s giving the thumbs
up to her partner Kirk,

over at his leg of the relay,

while the Legacies
watch on with Camille.

Three. Two. One.

And Christy is launched
out of the Silver b*llet

into Lake Wipeout.
Wow. Okay.

Which is made up of
50 percent of my tears.

Oh, wow. And the other
50 percent are my tears.

We are two of the saddest
people in America.

Christy makes it up
to Vertigo,

and she has to mount
the obstacle.

What are the rules
to the Vertigo?

Oh, thank you so much.
That’s a great question.

So, Christy has to mount
the obstacle,

make it to the middle,
hit that button in the middle.

That’ll bring the ramp
on the other side down.

And if she can safely make it
to the other side, she’s off.

Oohoh!

Honestlyfun to watch.

Just wait for that
corner one.

Sage advice from her
trainee, as Christy prepares

to attempt Vertigo
for a second goround.

Make your way to the middle.

All right.

Just make it around.

Oh, she upsidedown.

Like, that’s the
scariest part.

She’s at the middle.

The button is hit.
The ramp is down.

All right.
Hang on.

She’s hit the button.

She just needs to make it to

the outside of the obstacle.
Okay. Yes.

There you go.
Yes, Christy.

There you go. Get ready.

Yes, Christy.
Yes, Christy.

Yes, Christy.

Belly flop. Belly flop.

She made it.
Great job, Christy.

Great job.
Unleash the Kirk.

All right, Kirk.
Kirk’s set

to the Leap of Faith,
which means he has to leap

on that swinging arm,
round and round...

Uhhuh, uhhuh.
Until he gets on

the safe platform
on the other side.

Yes.

Ooh! Kirk makes it.

No.

And pancakes out, as to not
get decapitated

by the platform
he just jumped from.

Very smart.
All he has to do

is make it on to the safe
platform and hang on.

Yes.
And he does.

Great job, Kirk. Great job.
Yes, Kirk.

Got to make up a lot
of time right here.

Oh, baby.
Here we go, Kirk.

Triple thr*at
and the finish pad,

and you could win $25,000.
Here we go.

Oh, that’s a different
strategy.

.
It’s not working.

He is now in Lake Wipeout.

But it was fun to watch.
Yeah.

He’s got to act fast.
Yes.

Time is not his
best friend here.

All right, Kirk. Here we go,
man. Focus up.

You’ve got this.

For science!

And he’s
going right to the...

Oh!
Third one.

Oh.

You hate to see
how science...

Yeah. Justthat was
Can fail us.

That was the science of
gravity right there.

Physics?

Is thatyeah? Yeah?

I don’t know.
I don’t know anything.

It’s a miracle I’m employed.

One more sh*t.

Desperate third attempt.

Something needs to go right
for the scientists here.

Yes.

Visibly out of breath
on this third attempt.

Here we go, Kirk.
Good job. Good job.

All right, here he goes.
Kirk!

If he can get through this
right now,

they might have a sh*t.

Come on, Kirk!
Keep it up.

He may pull it off he leaps
at the right and makes it

Yes!
He made it!

Oh my God!

Nicole, it’s gonna be close.

Now I know why that
sucks so bad.

Nice job.
You too.

We have tallied up the times

in an absolute photo finish
Wipeout Zone.

This was the closest
Wipeout Zone we’ve had.

Really?
Oh my gosh.

It was science versus
family legacy,

with one team winning
by two seconds.

Brenna and Crystal,
you won "Wipeout."

$25,000!

Yeah!

Is there anything
you want to say

to your mom and your
brother?

We love you!
We did it for you!

We did it!
We love you!

Yes! You did it!

"Wipeout" winners.
All right.

The Wipeout Legacies
have finished

precisely what their
family started

all those years ago.

And we can finally
let their mom and brother

out of the
underground dungeon

where we keep all the
Wipeout Zone losers

from years past.

And that does it for this
week’s episode of "Wipeout."

All that’s left now

is one last big song and
dance. You ready, Nicole?

Oh, I sent an email

and I said there’s no way in
hell I’m doing that. Sorry.

I’ve been practicing
all week.

All right then.

Make sure to check back
in here next week

when Nicole and I
will watch more dynamic duos

compete for a $25,000 prize.

Until then, I’m John Cena.

And for Camille Kostek,

I’m Nicole Byer, saying
good night and Big Balls.