03x11 - The Ultimate Thrill

[bunniefuu]

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

Come on, honey. The sooner you
fork it over, the sooner you can party.

I can't get it off. It's stuck.

- Never mind. Keep it.
- Oh, thank you. Thank you.

Don't thank me, thank El Cheapo
here for buying cubic zirconium.

Now, this is real.

Oh!

You may have our jewels,
but you can't escape.

- There's nowhere to go.
- There's always down.

But we're , feet up.

Isn't it cool? Bye.

(HELICOPTER ZOOMING)

There she is.

(HELICOPTER WHIRRING)

PILOT: Bird One to base. Have sighted
robbery suspect and she's falling fast.

Nothing we can do.

(BEEPING)

Come to Roxy.

Hah!

Let's ride.

PILOT: Bird One to base. She's airborne.
Repeat, she is airborne.

I can play that game too, flyboys.

(NERVOUS SHUDDER)

- (COUGHING) We're gonna hit.
- Oh, my God!

(ALL GRUNTING)

(expl*si*n)

About time.

Fast men, fast planes.
It's almost heaven.

Let's burn.

Well, you got the skills,
you've got the guts,

but you just don't have the tools.

Dead man flying.

Thanks for a great first date.

I'll call you.

- ALFRED: Trouble, sir?
- There's major damage to the right wing.

ALFRED: Can you keep it aloft?
- I'll try.

But I'm losing altitude fast.

(PLANE CONTROLS BEEPING)

(TIRES SCREECHING)

(GRUNTING)

This is coming out of your allowance,
Master Bruce.

BATMAN: Roxy Rocket, AKA Roxanne Sutton.

She did all the stunts
for Jennifer Westing

in her action series.

BATGIRL: They say she doubled
for some of the men, too.

- She seems quite fearless.
- That was the problem.

She began making stunts more
dangerous than they needed to be.

The danger of the work had become
more important than the work itself.

Finally, no company would insure her.
She lost everything.

I guess she's exacting
some kind of revenge.

Or she's still after the thrill.
And now that she's had a taste of you

she's not gonna settle
for anything less.

One thing's for sure.

She'll need a fence
to get rid of the goods.

I wanna know who it is.

Late again, my felonious falcon.
I heard you flew into a little trouble.

No trouble. Just excitement.

Besides, I think you'll find
these worth the wait.

PENGUIN: Very nice.

It ain't chicken feed.

For your nest egg.

High card? Double or nothing?

Unlike you, my dear,
I don't take unnecessary risks.

Hmm.

Ten. Not hard to b*at.

I said no.

Oh, too bad. Nothing ventured...

You worry me, my pippin.

The chances you take.
I want you to tone it down.

And what? Spoil the fun?

This isn't a movie, you know.
I'm a legitimate businessman now.

I don't want
to draw attention to myself.

I can't afford to have my associates
getting Batman all excited.

But he loved it.

(GROAN)

I know he lives for the chase,
and I was the best he ever had.

Ever been pursued by a bird of prey?

Sorry, Pengie.

Some things are just too scary,
even for me.

(INDISTINCT TRAFFIC)

And after several weeks
of competitive bidding--

And a king's ransom.

(SCATTERED LAUGHTER)

Wayne Industries is now
the proud owner of Woman in Transition.

(INDISTINCT MURMURING)

- Kind of small, though.
- My kid could've done better.

- Security seems kind of light, Lucius.
- Believe me, Bruce, it's covered.

We've got guards posted
at the main entrance

and at all the elevators.

No way anyone can get up here.

(CROWD SCREAMING)

MAN IN CROWD: Someone call security.
Right now!

Now, if nobody gives me trouble,
this will all be quick and painless.

Ah, a bold statement. Energetic,
forceful...

And yet small enough
to fit in a saddlebag.

If you'll kindly step aside.

(CROWD GASPING)

(FIREWORKS BURSTING)

I see you got my invitation.
Let's rumba!

(LAUGHING)

(TRAFFIC HONKING)

(YAWNING)

(GRUNTING)

(ENGINE POWERING DOWN)

(INDISTINCT CROWD CHATTER)

(SCREAMING)

Come on, Rox. Pull up, pull up.

(ROXY GRUNTING)

You missed your calling, Batman.
You should have been in the movies.

- Give it up, Roxy.
- I'm afraid that's not in my nature.

Mine neither.

That's what makes us
such a perfect couple.

Catch!

(KISSING)

(BEEPING)

(GROANING)

Whoo-hoo!

(LAUGHING)

(GRUNTING)

- I hope it's good news.
- BATGIRL: It is.

I just found out
who Roxy's silent partner is.

- Gotham's trendiest restaurateur.-
- Penguin.

Yeah. My sources tell me she's been
seen at the Iceberg Lounge after hours.

Way after hours.

And you're sure your sources are good?

Depends on your definition of good.
But I trust them.

You practically threw yourself
into Batman's hands.

If he catches you, what's to prevent him
from making the connection to me?

You would've put
my whole operation at risk.

Relax, Pengie.
First, he's not gonna catch me.

And second, I'm not a pigeon.
I won't squawk.

I've seen him cr*ck
tougher eggs than you.

I'm sorry, my dear.

I just can't take that chance.

What's this?

I assure you,
it's not filled with birdseed.

But I thought you liked me.

I do. But an old bird like me
can't afford such flights of fancy.

(GROWLING)

Your famous luck has just run out.

My way would've been
so much more pleasant.

(WATER BUBBLING)

What?

(FIREWORKS SETTING OFF)

As the heroine escapes
through skylight, fade to black.

If she sings to Batman, it could mean
the end of everything I've built.

I want her wings clipped.

Permanently.

(SCATTING)

(HUMMING)

(GAGS)

(GROANS)

BATMAN: I see you gave your muscle
the night off.

What's it to you?

Could be dangerous.
You never know who might drop in.

What do you want?

Roxy Rocket. I believe you've seen this.

It's from the zeppelin robbery.

That's right. I found it in your pocket.

You never could resist
keeping a bauble or two.

Maybe you'd like to show me
your search warrant as well.

(b*llet SHELLS DROPPING)

(GRUNTING)

(STRANGLING GRUNTS)

(SCREAMS)

What say we have a little talk?
Just like old times.

(DRILLING)

(GRUNTING)

(BOTH EFFORT GRUNTING)

So, the old bird sent his chickens.

(MIMICS CHICKEN CLUCKING)

(GRUNTING CONTINUES)

Where'd she go?

(ENGINE STARTING)

(BOTH MOANING)

(STRUGGLING MOANS)

Bon voyage.

This would be my cue to exit.

(SCREAMING)

(SCREAMING)

(BOTH COUGHING)

(TIRES SCREECHING)

Lights! Camera! Action!

I love a man with staying power.

Unfortunately,
it's the third-act climax,

and you're not in the final scene.

Huh?

Oh, you're good.

I guess nothing lasts forever.

(GROANS)

(BOTH GRUNTING)

(BEEPING)

What are you doing?

Testing your true mettle, Batman.

Jump now and you'll land in the water.

And if I don't?

You'll either crash into the canyon wall
or hit the ground ahead.

So will you.

(CHUCKLES) Now you understand the game.

Time is running out.

Better make your move.

(STRUGGLING GRUNTS)

I thought you enjoyed risk.

Oh, baby, you're the best!

The ultimate thrill. The final stunt.

Me and you.

Yeah, yeah... Yeah!

I knew it would be this way.

The final stunt is the best.

What?

I get it. We live to play another day.

(HANDCUFFS CLICKING)

What's this?

(INDISTINCT POLICE SIRENS)

My kind of game. And you lost.

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)