01x10 - Way of the Dee Dee/The Justice Friends: Say Uncle Sam/Tribe Called Girl

[bunniefuu]

Ha ha ha!

Why do you do this?

You are so stupid!

Stupid! Stupid!
Stupid!

Oh, and let's
not forget--

you're so stupid!

Ow!

Oh, yeah?

Well, just because
I know how to have fun,

doesn't mean I'm stupid.

I may not know
all that scientifical,
mathemological stuff,

but I know how
to climb a tree,

and I know how
to pet a kitty
just right,

and I know how
to tie my own shoes,

Mr. Zipper-boot!

Actually, I feel sorry
for you, Dexter.

You're like a pickle--

sour and all bottled up
in your laboratory.

Toil away
alone in the dark,

searching for answers
to questions nobody asked,

locked away
from the world,

never to explore
the true mysteries
of life.

Well, you can keep
your cold, sterile
little lab.

As for me,

theworld
is my laboratory.

Good-bye, Dexter.

I shan't impose on you
ever again.

Dee Dee!

Everything you said
was true.

I don't want to be
a pickle,

but I need
your help.

Show me the way
to be free.

Show me the way
of the Dee Dee.

All right.

Meet me downstairs
in minutes.

Uh, where exactly
were we supposed
to meet?

Dee Dee: Dexter?

Dee Dee?

Yes, my brother.
I am here.

Are you ready
to start a journey
of enlightenment?

Uh, yes.

Good.

Discard those wrappings
which tie you to the lab.

There must be
a stripping of the old

before you start anew.

And

now step
into the light.

But I don't have
any sunscreen.

Do not fear,
little one.

The first step
is always the hardest.

[Thinking]
Yes.

I must cross
the burning sands
to reach truth.

Dexter,

my heart
swells with joy

seeing you here
in the yard.

I'm very proud
of you.

Come. Let's begin.

Look here, Dexter.
What do you see?

I see aranunculus,

a buttercup possessing
stamens, a stigma,

petals, sepals--

yes, yes, dear.
I know you can
examine it,

but can yousee

can yousmell

can youfeel

♪ can you sing with all
the colors of the rain? ♪

Ahh. Let's move on.

We'll try something
a little different--

an animal pantomime.

What?

Yeah.

You know, act like
your favorite animal.

I'm a bird! I'm a bird!

I'm a snake. I'm a snake.

It's fun.

Try it.

I don't do that
animal stuff,
sister.

I'm a straight-up
h*m* sapien.

You can do this--

just try to...
Visualize.

Oh, very well.

Visualize.
Visualize.

South Dakota,

million
years ago,

the plains are
ruled by a herd
of great beasts--

the mighty
triceratops,

truly
a formidable foe,

but his
armored hide,
massive size,

and terrible horns

all belie
his true nature.

For upon
closer study

of his flat,
grinding teeth,

it is clear he is...

A herbivore,
a gentle
plant-eater.

That was very good,
Dexter.

A little textbook,

but we're definitely
making progress.

Along with mental
exercise,

one must balance it
with physical exercise.

It's all
about the balance.

As one climbs
for new heights,

one may reach
the end of his rope,

but upon
achieving a balance
between both halves,

the turn round
upon themselves,

creating a wheel,
spinning themselves

higher and higher
and higher.

[Crash]

Are you sure
you're ready, Dexter?

This is the final
and most important
exercise of all.

Heck, yeah.

I'm a triceratops

balanced on
a buttercup

with spinning
wheels, baby.

Let's do this.

Ok. This is all about
self-expression.

Let it flow through
your mind and body.

Just let it loose.
Break out.

Yeah, yeah.

I've seen you do it
a million times.

Just hit the music.

[Classical music
playing]

Ha ha ha!

Hmm. Expressive.

Ooh! Ah ah ah!

Ah ah ah ah!

Daring.

Ha ha ha!

Reckless.

Ah! Ha ha ha!

Aah!

Scary.

Ha ha ha!

Dexter, stop!

Ha ha ha!

Stop it, Dexter!
Look at yourself!

You're a monster!

No longer
the quiet creator,
but a mad destroyer.

Oh, I'm so sorry.

I shouldn't have
pushed you.

I know now
it wasn't my place
to try to change you.

Oh, Dexter...

Please forgive me.

Oh, what have I done?

[Sobbing]

Announcer:
The justice friends--

of earth's
mightiest heroes

joining forces
under one roof

to face the challenge
of everyday life.

Starring major glory,

valhallen,

and the infragible krunk

in...

Justice friends,
assemble!

Justice friends,
assemble!

Justice friends,
assemble! Assemble! Assemble!

No need to scream,
major glory.

We're right here.

You block TV.

No more TV until we
finish practicing.

Practicing what?

Your superhero
entrances.

You two have
been very lazy
as of late.

Now, when I yell,
"justice friends,
assemble,"

you enter
dramatically,

like this.

Justice friends,
assemble!

Major glory!

See?

[Snoring]

[Burp]

It is imperative
that you two are
in tiptop shape.

For what?

We are
about to face

the greatest
challenge ever
put before us.

My uncle is
coming to visit
on Saturday.

So? Why art thou
so tense?

You don't
understand.

Uncle Sam
won't tolerate
imperfection.

It all started

when I was but
a wee minor glory

and my dear
uncle Sam took me
under his wing.

I want you

to be the greatest
American hero that
ever lived!

Yes, uncle Sam.

Now give me laps
around the world

and don't forget
to salute.

Yes, sir.

[Panting]

Mission
accomplished, sir.

Pledge of allegiance.
Go!

I pledge allegiance
to the flag

of the United States
of america.

Again!

I pledge allegiance
to the flag...

Of the United States
of america.

Ahh. Those were
the days.

In any case,
uncle Sam demands
perfection,

and I'll see to it
that he gets it.

Now, entrances!

Justice friends,
assemble!

It's going to be
a long week.

Now then,
uncle Sam demands
good etiquette,

so when drinking
coffee...

[Slurp]

Always keep your
pinkie extended.

Valhallen?

[Slurp]

Excellent.

Ha ha ha!

How about you,
krunk?

Come on.
Extend the pinkie.

Oh...

Come on, man.
Extend the pinkie.
Extend the pinkie!

Major glory: Uncle Sam
is a stickler for good posture.

Balancing books on one's head
is great practice.

Just keep your back
straight, krunk.

We'll straighten
you out yet.

Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh!

Now I want this
place spotless

for uncle Sam.

He's a bit
of a neat freak.

Must run in the family.

Let the cleaning
commence!

[Playing
hard-rock music]

[Squeak squeak]

Oh...

Goodness, how I love
the sound of clean.

Ooh, room messy.

Krunk clean.

Did you hear
something, dear?

Probably just
them crazy kids
upstairs again.

Major glory: Now then,
how about your costumes?

Valhallen,
your hair is too long,

and this outfit
is in shreds,

and, krunk, you show
far too much flesh.

Uncle Sam will
never accept this.

I am so embarrassed.

What will he accept?

Funny you should ask...

Ah, yes.
Just look at you two.

The very epitome
of the American dream.

Valhallen--a well-groomed
all-American sports hero,

and krunk--a stunning
symbol of successful
American business.

Uncle Sam
will be so pleased.

You want
krunk smash?

Wait till his
uncle leaves.

Ok.

[Tick]

Uncle Sam should
be here any minute.

Justice friends,
assemble!

Viking god of rock
and future baseball
hall of famer--

valhallen!

I think I got
a raspberry.

The world's
mightiest mortal

and c.E.O.
Of his own amalgamated
stock-investment firm--

infragible krunk!

Have reports
on krunk's desk
by : tomorrow,

or krunk smash!

Let's do lunch.

No, no, no!
A thousand times no!

Valhallen,
you were supposed
to slide headfirst,

and, krunk,
that tie does not
go with that shirt.

Now, we are going to
go over it again

and again and again

until we get it right!

¿Comprende?

Is there a problem?

Perhaps I've pushed
you too hard.

Uh!

[Doorbell rings]

Egad!
Uncle Sam is here!

What am I going to do?
The place is a shambles.

I can't face him.

Valhallen,
you answer the door.

Gasp.

[Gasp] [Gasp]

Major glory:
Uncle Sam!

What's happened
to you?

Doctor's orders,
nephew.

Told me I was
too high-strung.

Told me to loosen up,

and I feel great.

Hey, I love
a lived-in pad, man.

These your roommates?

Give me , dudes.

All right!

!

Ahh.

That's the spirit,
nephew.

You just
got to chill.

Ahh...

Time now
for a nice sit.

Hey! What do I
look like, a chair?

Nope.
"I" looks like this.

TV: Now back
tofield scientist.

This rare and primitive tribe
of monkey-people

exhibit amazingly
humanlike behavior.

This is
first-grade stuff.

Hi! Hi! Hi!

You look so good.

Girl, you look the best.
Look at you.

All: Slumber party!
Slumber party!

Slumber party!
Slumber party!

Slumber party...

[Chattering]

Oh, my gosh!

Computer, access
all available data
on "girl."

Computer: Complete file
displayed for "girl."

That's all? Huh.

I know
so very little
about this "girl."

Therefore
humankind must know
next to nothing.

It is up to me,
then.

I must observe them
in their natural
element...

But they must not
know I am near.

I will need
an ingenious
camouflage.

Yo! This group
looks dope, mee mee.

[Rap music playing]

It's a bad b*at
that I can bug out to.

Dexter's log,
field supplement.

I am here deep
in the heart
of the bowels

of a primitive
and dangerous
tribe of "girl."

It has been said

that they sometimes
exhibit humanlike
behavior.

Lee Lee, girl,
you can't have that
spot every time.

No savies.

I touch it. Tap tap.
No erasies.

Snap snap snap.
No tap tap.

Erasy snap snap.

Dexter: Why, I can
see them right now

jockeying for their
territorial rights.

Incredible.

Snap snap!

There's not even a snap
anywhere in this game.

It's tap tap,
no erasies, and--

wait! I've got it!

Darbie sleeps
in glamour town,

the Berry-patch sweeties
should grow in the shade

of baby-animal mountain,

and the "my little
unicorn" bag

should bask below
the glow-in-the-dark
unicorn poster.

Ahh.

Unicorn sandwich.

Dee Dee:
A unicorn sundae!

Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!

Can't have a sundae
without...

Marshmallows!

Ha ha ha!
Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!

Oh, but of course
this leads

to violent
power struggles.

Oh, these poor
savage creatures.

Huh?

Wow! And look how
they reestablish
their unity

by worshipping their
magical teen idols.

Oh, darling,
you smell
divine.

May I?

Why, be my guest,
love.

Don't mind
if I do.

Ooh, Lee Lee,
you're going to
smell beautiful.

Mm-hmm.

[Coughing]

[Gagging]

Oh, no!

Oh, my gosh! They
have spotted me!

Mayday! Mayday!
I'm being att*cked!

Oh, please
don't let them hurt me.

I'll always clean my room,
and I'll--

and I'll--I'll--

interesting outfit.

Dee, your bro
is weird.

Oh, no. He just has
special needs.

Why don't they att*ck?
Can they sense my fear?

What are they doing?

Mmm.
Mmm. Mmm.

Come on. Come on.

It's ok.
Come on out.

Come on out.

That's it.
We won't hurt you.

Come on. Come on.

Aw. How cute.

[Thinking]
They appear to be
making me

some sort
of peace offering.

It is best
I don't offend them.

Ugh! Ugh!

I know.

Your brother's
so smart,

let's give him
a test.

What?

You know,

eleventeen
magazine's

perfect guy
quiz.

Yeah!

Ok, Dex. Question one.

What's your sign?

[Thinking]
Are they trying

to teach me
their culture?

Your sign, Dexter?

Uh, what's he doing?

I don't know.

Second question.

What's your
favorite animal?

[Thinking]
Ah. A trick question.

I had better
appease them.

[Out loud]
Uh, "girl."

[Gasp]
[Gasp] [Gasp]

All: Dexter
likes girls!

Dexter likes girls!

Na na na
na na na!

Dexter
and some girls

sitting in a tree,

k-i-s-s-i-n-g!

[Thinking]
The tribe is
hysterical.

They seem to be
chanting in some
native tongue.

Hey, if Dexter's going
to have a girlfriend,

then we'd better
give him a...

Makeover!
Makeover! Makeover!

Ok. First of all,
the beatnik look
is out.

Let's try something
a little fresher.

Nah! Nah!

Nope.

Oh, no.

Well, this will just
have to do for now.

Ok. First we do
your nails.

[Thinking]
Ahh.

I guess I was
all wrong about
these simpletons.

They are humbled
by my superior
development.

Why, they are
bowing at my feet.

Ew! Ew!

Dee Dee: Ok.
Now your makeup.

Well, I think
that's the best
we can do here.

[Out loud]
Ahh.

This is the life.

[Thinking]
What pampering.

Huh?

[Out loud]
What is this?
w*r paint!

What is
going on here?

Dexter,
look how pretty you are,

except for that
old hairdo,

and if you don't
look good...

All: We don't look good.

Ha ha ha!
Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!

[Thinking]
I've become
a human sacrifice!

[Out loud]
No!

I'm sorry, Dee,
but your bro is weird.

I don't know. I think
he's kind of cute.

Dee Dee and mee mee:
Lee Lee and Dexter

sitting in a tree,

k-i-s-s-i-n-g!

here impossible
things may happen

that the world's
never seen before.

♪ In Dexter's
laboratory ♪

♪ lives
the smartest boy ♪

♪ you've ever seen

♪ but Dee Dee blows
his experiments ♪

♪ to smithereens

♪ there is
gloom and doom ♪

♪ while things
go boom ♪

♪ in Dexter's lab