02x23 - Sister Mom/The Laughing

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Dexter's Laboratory". Aired: April 27, 1996 – November 20, 2003.*
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A child genius, whips up dazzling, world-saving inventions in his secret laboratory.
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02x23 - Sister Mom/The Laughing

Post by bunniefuu »

Ha ha ha ha!

Oh, man, Dexter,

I just can't
believe it.

You,
of all people.

Here, let me
read it again.

Ok.
Now let's see--

ahem.

"It has come to our attention
that your son Dexter's
performance

"is not in compliance with
the standards we have set forth

"here at Huber elementary.

"Therefore in order to alleviate
this potential problem

we feel a parent-principal
conference is necessary
at this time."

Wow, Dexter.
What'd you do?

Dee Dee, it is not
so much what I did--

it is what we are
not going to do.

What?

[Sighs]

Whatever you do,
don't you tell mom!

But why?

Is that my two beautiful,
perfect children

who can do no wrong?

That's why.

Hiya, mom!

Hello, my Princess.

And there he is--

my little genius.

And did you have
a good day at school?

Oh, how silly of me--
of course you did.

Every day is a good day
for my little genius,

'cause you are the most
perfect, wonderful,

fantastic,
and brilliant boy
who ever lived.

Yes, you are, ha ha!

Aw, shucks, mom--
rub it in, why don't you?

[Bawling]

And modest, too.

Aah! What am
I gonna do?

I know--tell me
what you did!

What'd you do, what'd you do,
what'd you do?

Dee Dee, will you
quit bugging me?

I'm trying
to figure out
a sneaky way

of having this parent-
principal conference

without mom finding out!

Fine. I won't bug you
anymore.

But, Dexter,
if I was your mother,

I would be very hurt
to know that

my own son couldn't be
honest with me.

[Sniff]

That's it!

Oh, Dee Dee--
[Kiss]

Thank you,
thank you!
[Kiss kiss]

So you're gonna
tell mom?

Heck, no!

You're gonna be
my mother!

Whatcha talking about,
Dexter?

I'm talking about...

The molecular
makeover machine!

This baby can change
the outer appearance

of one organism--
oh, let's say, you--

to the exact likeness
of another--

such as mom.

Well,
I won't do it.

Ok. I guess you'll
never find out

what I did, then.

[Beeping]

[Beeps]

It's morphing time!

[Whirring]

Ooh...

Ahh...

Ooh...

Aaah!

[Dee Dee's voice]
Ooh...

Oooohhh!

Dexter: Dee Dee,
cut it out!

We're gonna be late!

Come on.

Is that any way
to speak to your mother?

Dexter! I want you to wash
your homework, feed the trash,

take out your dinner,
clean Dee Dee's room,

mow the carpet,
vacuum the grass,

and water the cat.

[Growl]

Give us a kiss.
[Growl]

Eww, gross!

I don't wanna
kiss you!

So, what's new?

[Clock ticking]

Ooh, busted! Ooh!

Dexter: Dee Dee!

Don't blow this.
Act like a mom.

Oh, I love you
so much!

Yes, I do!

Let me pinch those
widdle cheekie-weekies!

Cut it out!

Woman: Dexter...

The principal
will see you now.

Dexter's in trouble!
Dexter's in trouble!

Oh, Dexter is--
yes, Dexter is--

I said,
Dexter is in trouble!

Oh, Dexter is--
yes, Dexter is--

I said,
Dexter is in trouble!

Don't ask.

Uh, first off,

I'd like to thank you
both for coming.

No problem, princy!

Yes. Well, I suppose
you're wondering
why you're here.

You bet!
What did he do?

What did he do?

Well, I was just
getting to that--

so I-If you'd like
to take your seat--

[sighs]
Ok.

[Whispers]
Stop it.

Stop what?

That.
You mean this?

Yes, that.

Why?

Because.
Because why?

Because
I said so.

Well, who are you?

Your brother,
that's who!

Um, I-I mean,

sorry, mom.

That's ok,
dorkster.

I know you're
dumb.

So where were--
aah!

Candy!

Oh, yes. Please...
Help yourself.

[Gobbling]

So...
As I was saying,

we here at
Huber elementary

take great pride in
our brightest students,

like Dexter here--

which brings me to why
I called you both here.

It's seems that...
Well, Dexter's grades
are slipping.

Now, ma'am, I know
this may be hard
for you to swallow,

but...

But...
[Sniff]

But--Dexter got
an "a-minus" on
his last test.

[Sobs]

I'm sorry!

That's it?

An "a-minus?"That's
what you did wrong?

Uh...

You give me
a full body makeover

all for a lousy
"a-minus?"

Jeez, I thought
you stole the
school mascot

or destroyed
the science lab!

Hey!

Or at least t.P.'D
his office!

Hey!

But, no! You got
a stupid "a-minus."

Dork.

Oh, my.

Well,mom,

I wouldn't have gotten
an "a-minus"

if my stupid sister
would stop bugging me!

Dee Dee is
not stupid!

She's prettier,
taller, nicer,

friendlier, happier,

and way more popular
than you'll ever be!

Plus your father and I
like her best, so--

whaaaa!

Oh!

Eeeeyaaaah!

Hooooooaahhh!

Uh-oh.

Wait...uh...

Uh...stop? Please?

Please!

Stop!

That's enough!

Obviously this Dee Dee
is the root of a lot
of aggression

between you two...

Which is why I'd like
the of you to talk to
the school counselor--

let's say,
same time tomorrow?

Thank you all
for coming.

Really,
thank you.

Now, Dee Dee,
tell me,

how are you?

How does
Dee Dee feel?

[Dexter voice]
Duh, Dee Dee--duh--
feels dumb...

Yeah, uh-huh, uh-huh.

Dee Dee dumb!
Dee Dee dumb!

Stop it, Dexter!
I am not dumb--

I mean, you're
not dumb--

well, yes, you--
Dexter is dumb...

[Shouting]

Yes, well,
I see.

Dexter, how do
you

[dog panting]

[Woof]

I see no problem
here. Do you?

Nope. Want to go
get some lunch?

Surely.

[Shouting]

Hmm...

I wonder why mom sent me
to go get milk on my birthday.

Hmm. What's with all the cars
in front of my house
on my birthday?

Hmm. Boy, there sure are a lot
of strange things happening

on my birthday.

Why's the door locked
on my birthday?

Well, it's my birthday,

so I guess I'll go
around the back.

Surprise!

Happy birthday, Dee Dee!

[Delighted shouting]

Birthday party!

[Munching]

All right,
everybody.
Gather round.

It's showtime.

Dee Dee: Oh, boy! Oh, boy!
Oh, boy! Oh, boy! Oh, boy!

What is
going on here?

What is all
the excitement for?

Okey-doke.
Everybody ready?

I think I hear
something coming.

Ready for what?
What's coming?

Dee Dee, what's
going on?

What is that?

♪ Hello, hello, hello

yay!

Yoooou....

♪ Put that down
to a clown ♪

♪ to a clown

♪ here comes the clown
who turns that frown ♪

♪ upside down

yay!

What is this creature?

[Seal barks]

Animal simulation!

Shape-shifter!

He's crazy.

[Honk honk]
Joke time! Joke time! Joke time!

All right, kids--

why is afraid of ?

'Cause ate !

[Laughing]

I don't get it.

[Chortles]

Aaah!

Oops!
Sorry, kid.

And then he said,
"'cause ate ."

[Laughing]

Heh heh heh.

Ha ha ha ha ha!

Ha ha ha ha!

Excuse me.

Ha ha ha ha ha!

Can't--ha ha--
stop--ha ha--laughing!

Ha ha ha ha!

[Goofy laughter]

Dexter?

Dexter!

[Laughing]

[French accent]
Oh, my darling,

you are so beautiful.

You are like the sweet
nectar of the flower.

Oh, Pierre.

Hello!

[Fanfare]

♪ Don't look up,
don't look down ♪

♪ don't wink an eye,
watch the birdie fly ♪

♪ 'cause here comes
the clown ♪

Pardon me, madam,
but would you be so kind
as to tell me the time?

Well, I think
it's--

that's right!
It's joke time!

Why is afraid of ?

'Cause ate !

Ha ha ha ha!

Aah!

[Laughing]

Ohh...

Hi, Dexter.

Dee Dee, what are you
doing in my room?

And what is with
all the balloons?

You don't remember,
do you?

Remember what?

You don't remember!
You don't remember!
You don't remember!

Rememberwhat?

This.

What does a stupid,
crazy clown

have to do with me?

Take a closer look,
Dexter.

Hmm...

He does look
a bit familiar.

But I do not
recognize him.

Here. Let me help.

Let us take a piece
of tracing paper...

Put on some hair,

add some dorky
glasses,

a lab coat,
and some boots.

Mm-hmm, mm-hmm,
mm-hmm.

Andvoila!

Now do you recognize him?

Dexter?

Computer:
Scanning commencing.

Dexter, point
of infestation found.

Funny bone infected with
unidentifiable substance.

Computer,
computate antidote.

[Machines whirring]

[Beeping]

[Sighs]

It is already past my bedtime,

and still no antidote.

Heh heh.

Stupid robots.

Ha ha ha ha!

Oh, no!

I--can't--stop--laughing!

Well, Mr. Piggy,

how do you like
your tea?

Dee Dee!

You--ha ha ha--
have to help!

I'm--ha ha--turning
into the clown again!

Really?

Too--ugh--late!

[Goofy laughter]

Hello, little girl.

Hello,
Mr. Dexter clown.

Do you know why
is afraid of ?

'Cause ate .

That's right!

I better help Dexter
before somebody gets hurt.

Dee Dee to the rescue!

But how?

[Blowing whistle]

[Blows whistle]

[Tires screech]

[Cars crashing]

[Goofy laughter]

[Gasps]

I think I'm gonna need
some backup.

I hope this will work.

My brother's become
a crazy clown, and he's
run loose in the city!

Can anyone help me--

oh, I get it--

[muffled]

Ok.

Thank you!

[Laughing]

[Ruff ruff]

[Laughing]

Hold it--

cop # : Would you
look at that?

Cop # : Yeah,
that there's a--

what do you
call 'em, Mitch?

Mime.

That's a genuine
mime!

Yeah, yeah.
What's she
gonna do?

I think she's
trying to capture him.

Yep, yep.
She's got a lasso.

Oop, she missed.

He's onto her.

Look out,
he's got a pie!

Ooh, he missed!

Uh-oh, he's trying
to get away.

Oh, she missed!

No, she got him
this time.

Now what's she
doing?

She's got something
heavy--

she's lifting
it up--

ooooh, that's quite
a load!

It's over
the clown--

wh-wh-whoa--

she's gonna
drop it!

Ooh!
She got him!

Yeah, she dropped
a safe on him.

Yeah. Now what?

She's putting him
in a box

and tying him up
nice and tight.

[Whistles]
She's good.

Real good.

So, shall we
arrest him?

Nah. I think she's
got everything
under control.

Computer: Dexter,
funny bone virus treated
and extracted.

[Rushing air]

Thanks for helping me
get out of that mess,
sis.

But I am sure I would
have figured it out
eventually.

Hey!

Dee Dee, quit
clowning around!

♪ In Dexter's laboratory

♪ lives the smartest boy

♪ you've ever seen

♪ but Dee Dee blows
his experiments ♪

♪ to smithereens

♪ there is
gloom and doom ♪

♪ while things
go boom ♪

♪ in Dexter's lab
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