04x10 - Voice Over/The Blonde Leading the Blonde/Comic Stripper

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Dexter's Laboratory". Aired: April 27, 1996 – November 20, 2003.*
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A child genius, whips up dazzling, world-saving inventions in his secret laboratory.
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04x10 - Voice Over/The Blonde Leading the Blonde/Comic Stripper

Post by bunniefuu »

[Birds chirping]

[Beeping]

[Alarm buzzes]

Good morning, computer.

[Skidding]

Computer?

What seems to be
the problem, computer?

Hmm.

You mean your voice program
has been corrupted, right?

So fix it.

How long could that take--
like what, two seconds?

What? hours?

How am I supposed
to finish my invention

without your verbal
consultation?

Nonsense!

A scientist of my caliber
cannot stoop

to such primitive
and outdated forms
of communication

like reading.

I must repair it myself.

[Grunts]

Ok, computer,
how's that sound?

I just got in
from Boston,

and boy, was it
a hard drive.

[Rim sh*t and laughter]

Ha ha ha!

Whoa. This is even better
than that old one.

Let's get to work.

Man's voice:
Ooh, boy.

Kind of a small
crowd tonight,

so I'll keep
my set short.

[Rim sh*t]

Speaking
of short:

Dexter is
so short,

he wears
elevator pants.

[Rim sh*t and laughter]

Ha ha. Very funny.

Great.

There. I hope that
feels better.

Woman's voice:
Oh, yes, Dexter.
It feels wonderful.

Ha ha ha!

Yes, it does sound
a little better,
doesn't it?

Oh, yes.

Uh, well,

I guess I'll just
get back to--

heh heh heh!

Chair.

Computer...

Could you retrieve
the current figures

on the ratio
of energy input

as compared
to output?

Of course,
Dexter.

It would be
my pleasure

retrieving
that information
for you.

Atomic output
is . .

Solar output
is .

Nuclear output
is , .

Caloric output:
. .

Perspiratory
output: .

and rising.

[Water running]

Dexter...

Dexter?
Dexter?

Dexter?

All right,
let's try again.

Man's voice: Welcome
to my new voice,

brought to you
in highest-quality
stereophonic sound.

Yeah, yeah,
it sounds just
fine.

Now, can we
please just get
back to work?

If you know the name
of the project you'd
like to work on,

press or say " " now.

One.

If you'd
like to choose
from a list

of current projects,

press or say
" " now.
One, one,
one, one!

I'm sorry, but you

have exceeded
the time limit.

One!

If you know the name
of the project--

I'm sorry.
That selection
is not in the system.

Please try again now.

Ahem. One.

Enter now.

Oh, brother.

Enter the first letters
of the project now.

If the first letters
contain a "q" or a "z,"
press or say "pound" now.

All right,
that better work,

because I'm not going
all the way back
in there again.

Dee Dee's
voice:
Hi, Dexter!

Man's voice:
Let's get ready
to wrennnch!

Aah!

[Computer
speaking Spanish]

Mi casa
es su casa.

¿Cuantos anos
tienes tu?

¿Donde esta
la biblioteca?

¿Que color
es su pelo?

[Coughing]

Voice like Robin leach:
The sprawling and palatious
laboratory,

filled with the finest
and most expensive
scientific devices

known to man.

Behold this never-before-seen
secret hideaway of knowledge:

A virtual scientific paradise
of tubes and beakers galore,

literally acres and acres
of priceless gadgets
and doodads,

some of which
not yet invented.

And what, might I ask,
is the price tag

for this
unimaginable opulence?

A whopping...

Woman's voice:
Good morning, Dexter.

I have completed

the repairs
on my voice chip

and am ready
to return to work.

Dexter? Dexter?

What seems to be
the trouble, Dexter?

Dexter: The end.

Ahh, what
a great book.

I think I'll
read it again,

just for
old times' sake.

Dee Dee: ♪ la la la
la la la la la ♪

♪ la la la la
la la la la...


Dee Dee, what
are you doing?

Having fun.

What are you
doing, Dexter?

Dee Dee...

When I
am in this room,

whether
I am typing,

or whatever
it is you

hear happening
down here--
heh heh heh--

what does it
mean I am doing?

[Neigh]

Playing super pony?

No. It means
I am working!

[Breathes heavily]

Dexter, you're
miserable.

You really need
to get out more.

Dee Dee,
do not tell me
who is mineral,

and the person
who is need to
get out is you.

Out of my
laboratory!

You make me tear
my hairs out.

[Ding]
That's it!

Dex, you're a genius!

This is true
many times over,

but why must i--

you just have to
dye your hair blond.

My what?

Then you wouldn't
be so miserable.

Do not touch me.

Come on, Dex,

everyone knows blondes
have more fun.

Dee Dee,
what makes you
think

I need to have
more fun,

when I already
have this?

I don't know.

But you should try it
anyway, Dex.

It's a proven fact.

See you.

I'm off to have
more fun than you.

Impossible!

[Squeaking]

Now, if Dee Dee's theory
is correct,

which, of course,
it cannot be,

it is this blonde rat

which should be having

the most fun.

Hmm. We will see.

[Squeaking]

[Squeaking]

Ha! It is truly
as I have suspected.

Dee Dee's theory about
blondes having more fun

cannot possibly be--

[engine revving]

Be.

[Tires squeal]

[Motorcycling continues]

Additional testing is required.

Uhh...

[Ticking]

[Ringing]

: ?

Oh, my gosh!

I must have, like,
totally slept in.

Oh, well. Ha ha ha!

I feel great.

Time to comb my hair.

Oh, well.

Maybe I'll just
do some more reading.

Aah!

This book is hours overdue!

I've got to return it
to the library immediately.

[Grunts]

This book is, like, so heavy.

Oh, I'll never get across.

Ugh.

There.

[Tires screeching]

Oh, no, no, no.
After you.

Oh, heavens, no.

You have
the right of way.

Please
go right ahead.

Oh, don't be silly.
You go.

Please. First.

What courteous drivers.

[Door opens]

Ohh. Yes?

Hello. I am sorry,

but this book is
/ hours overdue.

Really?

Well, there's going
to have to be a...

You're all set.

Here's
your card back.

Wow! Thanks.

This is turning out
to be the most super fun
day of my life.

After you.

Thanks.

Man: This one's
on the house.

Dexter: Whee!

Man on P.A.:
Two, one, zero...

[Crowd cheering]

[Machine beeping]

All: Yay!

[Gasp]

Ooh.

[Cheering]

Dexter: All right, kids.

See you next time.
Whoo-hoo!

[Sigh]

I cannot remember
the last time

I had so much, like, fun.

Hee hee hee!

Oh, Dexter!

Hee hee hee!

Hey, Dexter,

want to come out and play?

Dexter!

Why are you ignoring me?

[Music playing]

Oh. Hey, Dee Dee,
come on in.

I don't know why,

but I never realized
how much fun

ab-ercising was.

I know why, Dex.

Oh, you do, do you?

Yipe!

Dee Dee: It's because
I dyed your hair blond

last night.

Dee Dee! You--

you...

Were absolutely
right.

Blondesdo
have more fun.

[Music plays]

♪ La la la la la la

♪ la la la la holiday

♪ la la la la la la

♪ la la la la holiday

♪ la la la la la la

♪ la la la la holiday

[Dog barking]

Mandark:
Your weakness shows,
oh lowly adversary.

Hmm. Where have I
heard that line before?

Your skills
are no match

for the powers
of misery.

Where have I
seen that move before?

It all seems so familiar.

Prepare to meet
thy doom

by the hand of misery!

To be continued
next month

in another
action-packed battle.

Ha ha ha!

Ha ha ha!

To be continued?

What is going on?

[Clock ticking]

Ehh. Ehh.

No. No.

[Muffled]
In another
action-packed battle.

Ha ha ha!
Ha ha ha!

Ha ha ha!

[Gasp]

I know I have seen
those fight moves before.

I must be losing my mind.

[Sigh]

To be continued
next month

in another
action-packed
battle.

No way!

It cannot be.

I do not believe it.

More of the same fight moves
and corny dialogue--

exactly

that lousy copycat mandark.

He's been cribbing
off ofmister misery

ahem.

Well, I can play that game, too.

I will get the next issue
ofmister misery

before mandark does,

and I will b*at him
at his own game.

Man: Let me
get this straight.

You want to buy
every copy

of the new
mister misery

[low voice]
Yes.

That is correct.

Um, I can't.

They don't go
on the shelves--

ok. Ok.

Man: Uh, need
a hand with that?

Dexter: No, thank you.

Hmm.

He should arrive
at any moment

from his manhole of misery.

I wonder what is
taking him so long.

He should have
been here by now.

Wait.

What is this?

What is he doing?

That is not the way
he shows up.

Leave it
to mandark

to read a comic book wrong.

Well, at least
say your lines.

Quack.

What?

That is not
what he says.

What is going on here?

What is with
all this quacking?

Quack. Quack. Quack.

None of this
is in the book.

What in the--

quack. Quack.
Quack. Quack.

Prepare to meet
thy doom, opponent.

Quack! Quack! Quack!

What, is there a page
missing or something here?

Stupid book!

Quack!

Aah!

What was that?

What is going on,
mandark?

Ha ha ha!
Ha ha ha!

Ha ha ha!
Ha ha ha!

What is so funny?

Uh-oh.

[Coughing]

You did it
all wrong, mandark.

I figured out

you were copying
mister misery
all along.

So I played
your own game

against you.

[Yawning]

And then you
have the nerve

not to even follow
the dumb story.

Oh, and one other thing.

What is with all
the stupid quacking?

Well, you see,
Dexter,

I went to buy
mister misery,

but the store
was all sold out.

So I picked up
a copy of

dangerous duck

and do you know why
mister misery

was all sold out?

BecauseI
bought them all.

Hmm. Well, then.

If you bought
them all,

how did you
expect me to know

all of mister misery's
new fight moves, then?

Quack!

Man: Enter at your own peril,

past the bolted door,

where impossible
things may
happen

that the world's
never seen before.

♪ In Dexter's laboratory

♪ lives the smartest boy
you've ever seen ♪

♪ but Dee Dee

♪ blows his experiments

♪ to
smithereens ♪

♪ there is gloom and doom
while things go boom ♪

♪ in Dexter's lab
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