03x18 - Hutchinson for m*rder One

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Starsky & Hutch". Aired: April 30, 1975 –; May 15, 1979.*
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Streetwise Detective David Starsky partners up with a more intellectual partner, Kenneth 'Hutch' Hutchinson, to protect citizens and patrol the streets of Bay City.
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03x18 - Hutchinson for m*rder One

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[♪♪♪]

Fifty doll... Oh!

They get you any way
they can. They really do.

Good evening, officer.

No, it's not. And
where's that receipt

from when we took
Bennie out to dinner, huh?

Dinner? That was
orange juice and a hot dog.

That was a legitimate expense.

I've told you a
million times, Starsk,

we gotta have
vouchers for those things.

Don't tell me accounting's
into that again.

No, Dobey's in there
waiting for us with receipts,

if you want to get compensated.

This is the only
compensation I need.

What are you doing? Going
into the shoe business?

[SQUEAKING]

Hmm? Oh, I see.

It's the exterminating
business, one by one.

Her name's Louise.
She's a chinchilla.

Yeah. I got her for a
couple of hundred bucks

from a guy who
needed the money bad.

Next week I'm gonna
get a little boy chinchilla.

You're a dirty old
man, you know that?

Well, I'll tell you something.
They breed like rabbits.

[BUZZING]

Hutchinson.

Oh, yes, captain.

We're all ready.

Right.

Right away.

Dobey wants us
in there right now.

How you doing?

Okay.

Let's go.

Listen, Louise... don't go away.

[HUMS MELODY]

Starsky. Mmm?

This scribbling on
a cocktail napkin

is not what the auditing
department had in mind

when they asked for receipts.

They don't take credit cards

at the Bucket O' Blood, captain.

[RINGING]

Dobey.

Yes, he's here, but
he's in a meeting.

Who is this?

Just a minute.

It's for you.

Says her name's Vanessa.

Hutchinson here.

"Hutchinson here."
You sound so formal.

Who is this?

Ha. The lady who
never darned your socks.

Vanessa?

Yes, Ken. It's me.

Uh...

Hold on, will you?

Transfer this to .

Uh, it's a private call.
I'll be right back, captain.

What was that all about?

Did he say Vanessa?

Right.

No, I still look...
pretty much the same.

Maybe a little older.

Uh, not now.

Hey, look, Vanessa,

you didn't call me just
to find out how I look.

What's going on?

Well, I'm in town
and I want to see you.

Why?

I don't know.

Talk about the good old days.

Well, they weren't that good.

They weren't all that bad.

All right, what do you want?

I told you. To talk to you.

After five years?

Four years...

six months and twelve days.

Please, Hutch. It's important.

Yeah, well, uh...

Okay.

Where and when?

You name it.

Well, I have a friend
who owns a place

called The Pits.

It's on th off Holland Avenue.

The Pits?

You haven't changed.

I'll see you at .

Yeah.

Dobey says we can meet later.

What about?

Our expense vouchers.

Oh.

Good.

Care to talk about it?

What?

That was the ex-Mrs.
Hutchinson on the phone, wasn't it?

Yeah.

And?

[EXHALING DEEPLY]

Well, she, uh...
wants to see me.

After five years.

Gonna go?

I guess so.

Well, it's you and
me tonight, Louise.

[SOUL MUSIC PLAYING]

[PEOPLE CHATTERING]

Hutch.

Hey, man, you
are one tight closet.

I didn't even know you
had a ball and chain.

Give me a cigarette, will you?

Hey, you don't smoke.

Hi.

Hi.

HUGGY: Ahem! How's
about a drink on the house?

Uh, Huggy...

this is Vanessa.

How are you?

Fine. And getting better.

What would you like, Vanessa?

Because it's most
definitely yours.

I'll have my regular.

HUGGY: Which is?

Uh, brandy Alexander.

HUGGY: Mm-hm. You got it.

And give Ken a
vodka on the rocks

with a twist and
a splash of tonic.

I also remember.

Yeah.

Uh...

would you like to, uh...

find another seat?

Yeah.

Take your coat? Mmm.

Thank you.

[SIGHS]

Yeah, well, um...

[CHUCKLING]

You're looking good, lady.

Thank you.

Don't thank me. I got
nothing to do with it.

Four years hasn't
hurt you at all.

Hmm, you're getting a
few lines here and there.

A little less hair.

[LAUGHING]

Character becomes you, Ken.

Yeah, that's me, all
right. Full of character.

Uh, so, uh...

how you been feeling?

Don't.

Don't what?

"Looking good, feeling okay."

Let's not talk like

we're old college
buddies on a class reunion.

Yeah, well, maybe it's
better if we just left it that way.

Can you let go of all the nights

we fell asleep
holding each other?

And woke up fighting.

Look, uh...

Van...

what do I say to a
lady who... left me...

because she thought being
married to a cop held no future?

Interesting you remember
the pain but not the love.

If there was that much love,

we'd still be
married, wouldn't we?

I still love you.

Separate or together.

Yeah, sure you do.

Don't you believe
me? Does it matter?

Yes! It does.

Look, Van, we had our sh*t.

We blew it. It's
over. It's finished.

You've changed, Ken.

What is this routine, Van?

I mean, we haven't seen
each other in forever,

and you come around
the bend saying,

"I love you, tender guy."

You left me to go look
for your pot of gold.

You come back with
nothing but... Full of hot air.

I'm sorry. Ken, I'm sorry.

You still know how to
push the buttons, don't you?

Well, I don't like it.

HUGGY: I'm sorry I took
so long with the drinks.

Would you believe
my bartender forgot

how to make a brandy Alexander?

Maybe another time.
Maybe another person.

Put it on my tab,
will you, Huggy?

Ken, wait. Please don't
go. I have to talk to you.

We don't talk. We fight.

We hurt each other.

I'm gonna make you a deal.

You stay out of my life

and we'll both breathe easier.

Ken... Okay?

Ken! Ken!

Please, please.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Forget it, will
you? Just forget it.

Listen, uh...

let me come home
with you tonight.

You gotta be kidding.

Look, uh...

I have to...

Please, I don't want
to be alone tonight.

So, what's so
special about tonight?

I'm going into the
hospital tomorrow.

What for?

A biopsy.

They want to, uh...

check to see if it's
malignant or not...

and you know me with
doctors and hospitals.

And I'm just a scared little
girl when it comes to the...

Get in, will you?

Get in!

Let's go.

Who's the guy?

Does it matter?

[SHUTS OFF ENGINE]

Ah. This is it?

It's upstairs.

Ha-ha! It would have to be.

[SHUTS ENGINE OFF]

Do you think the
guy's working with her?

Maybe.

What are we gonna do?

Wait.

I hate waiting.

You'll learn to love it.

What have you been doing

for the last four years,
six months and...?

And days.

Twelve days.

[LAUGHS]

Oh, well...

I've been into jewelry.

Oh, yeah?

Mm-hm.

What does that mean?

Buying and selling on
the international market.

If you don't watch out,

your ex-wife may become
a very wealthy woman.

Well, I'll drink to that.

Mmm... care to share the wealth?

Good-looking partners
are awfully hard to come by.

Sure, throw half a mil my
way. I need a new carburetor.

I know just the way
you can make that much.

Uh... well, Van,
if you're serious...

it's probably shady.
And I'm a cop.

And if you're not serious,

we've both got a
big day tomorrow.

So maybe we
ought to hit it, huh?

Mmm.

Uh... I'll take the couch.

[CHUCKLING]

Uh, you don't have to
be so proper, you know.

Well, I'm, uh...

What?

I'm a little old-fashioned.

Mmm.

I love old-fashioned men.

Um...

Well, maybe we'll
talk about that...

tomorrow night.

[THUNDER CRACKS]

Good night.

Sure.

Tomorrow.

Why don't we bust in on 'em now?

We'll wait.

For what?

When the time is right.

Well, when is that gonna be?

I'll let you know.

[SIGHS]

Hey.

VANESSA: Make that two.

Good morning.

Good morning.

[POURS TEA]

Six-fifteen.

[CHUCKLING]

Six-thirty.

Six... Oh, no.

Still the same routine
after all these years, huh?

Ha-ha! What's that?

Up at :...

throw some water in your face...

take a sip of strong
black coffee...

go out for a mile run,
and back for a shower.

You've got me pegged. Mmm.

Hey.

Hmm?

[SIGHS DRAMATICALLY]

How about breaking
training for once, hmm?

Hmm.

Can't do that. Mmm.

What time do you have
to be at the hospital?

At .

You go out for your run,

and I'll have breakfast
for you when you get back.

Okay.

Scrambled, medium.

You got a good memory.

Hmm. Eight minutes?

Well, I've slowed
down a little bit.

You better make that .

[DOOR CLOSES]

[SIGHS]

I'd like to make a long-distance
call to Amsterdam, please.

Yes, Holland.

Uh, the number is...

.

Yes. Thank you.

Hello?

Hello, Mr. Steen.

Vanessa.

I just want to confirm.

I have the gem.

Mmm.

Well, I'm taking

the : flight to
Amsterdam this morning.

Uh, how long will it be
before you can recut it?

I can't wait three weeks.

We'll have to make an
adjustment on the money.

Fine.

See you then.

[SIGHS]

[WHISPERING] Brekky.

[HUMMING IDLE MELODY]

Eh, Ken. I thought you
said you were slowing down.

Mr. Wheeler's very
disappointed in you, Vanessa.

You weren't on the plane to
London yesterday as he arranged.

I'm taking today's flight.

I cleared it with Mr. Wheeler.

Hey, look, you better leave
before my friend returns, okay?

You worried about
her friend, Cardwell?

Are you kidding? I like
meeting new friends.

Mr. Wheeler doesn't,
uh, like his mules

to go into business
for themselves.

So, uh, where is it?

It's in my handbag. Where else?

It's, uh, in a little
suede purse.

Uh, hey, look, you guys,

Mr. Wheeler knows
about the delay.

I mean, all you
have to do is call him.

Ah!

Boyle... look at this.

[BADGE CRASHES ON TABLE]

Women are hard to believe.

You were going to the cops.

That's not true.

He's a cop...

but he's just a one-night stand.

A girl gets lonely, you
know what I mean?

Yeah, sure.

Look at the size of this sucker.

Things always seem to
work out one way or the other.

[ENGINE STARTS UP]

[TIRES SCREECH]

[BREATHES HEAVILY]

Van?

[SIREN WAILING]

[TIRES SCREECH]

Drink it.

[BREATHING SHAKILY]

What happened?

DOBEY: I'm sorry, Hutchinson.

Yeah.

Look, um, Simonetti
and Dryden...

a couple of guys
from Internal Affairs,

want to speak to you.

Come on, captain,

what does Internal
Affairs have to do with this?

Starsky, you know
as well as I do

when someone's k*lled
with a police officer's w*apon

Internal Affairs is
automatically involved.

It's the standard
operational procedure.

Just routine.

There's nothing
routine about this.

Hutch's ex-wife was
k*lled in his own living room.

Look, I'm not gonna
argue with you about this.

It's just the way it's set up.

Like I said, Hutchinson...

It's okay, captain.

I'll go through the numbers.

Hey... we'll nail 'em.

Yeah.

BOYLE: We were up all night.

She was one stupid lady.

How did she ever get the idea

that she could get away with
ripping off a stone this size?

She came close.
Give her credit for that.

Isn't this beautiful?

One million dollars,
more or less, give or take...

It's a synthetic!

What?

This is a copy. A fake. A fraud.

A piece of glass. And not
a very good piece of glass.

It's an imitation!

That's impossible, Mr. Wheeler.

We took it right out of her
bag. She said it was there.

"She said." "She said."

I suggest

that you return to that police
officer's house once again.

The lab report says
death was caused

by one sh*t, from your magnum.

HUTCH: We both know that.

It's just routine. We have to
go through it. You know it's...

Yeah, yeah, sure.

How did it happen?

I was jogging.

Left your g*n in the room, huh?

It's a little difficult to
run any kind of a mile

with three pounds of steel
strapped to your armpit,

don't you think?

Makes sense.

I understand you were
once married to the victim.

That's in the file.

Any idea why someone
might want to k*ll her?

Last night was the...

It was the first time
I'd seen her in...

Five...

No.

Four years, six
months and twelve days.

SIMONETTI: Hutch, why don't
you just run it through for me

from the time you first
heard from her, okay?

Look, I'm a cop.

So don't do any of
your numbers on me.

You think for a second
if I knew anything, I...?

You're also emotionally
involved. You're her ex-husband.

It does tricky
things to the mind.

Just what happened.
Where you first met her.

No big deal. Just
for the records...

Okay, okay.

I took her for a drink.
A place called The Pits.

It's owned by a friend of mine.

DRYDEN: Yeah, I know the place.

And after that, she wanted
to come home with me.

A little bit of old times, huh?

Nothing like that.

She had to go to the
hospital in the morning.

She didn't want to
spend the night alone.

Which hospital?

And why?

She has a...

She had a tumor.

She was going in for a biopsy.

I-I didn't know
what hospital it was.

She was gonna take a cab.

Your ex-wife has a tumor,
and you put her up for the night

and won't drive
her to the hospital?

Simonetti,

I don't have to justify a thing.

That's the way it went
down. You figure it out.

Well... what do you think?

I think we do our job,
and we check it all out,

down to crossing the last T.

You see Hutchinson's
record? He's a good cop.

Did you see the face
and body of the victim?

I've seen women like that blow
a cop's career more than once.

Let's give Hutchinson
a good shake

and see if his badge falls out.

Uh, no sign of any tumor.

You sure, doc?

Well, that's my job, Dryden.

When I say no tumor,
it's exactly what I mean.

No tumor.

Interesting.

Well, there's something else.

Um, there was blood and skin

under the nails
of her right hand.

Blood type B-negative,
skin texture Caucasian,

Nordic type,

most likely between
the ages of , .

Hello, Mary. This is Simonetti.

Do you happen to
have Hutchinson's file

in front of you?

Good.

Give me his blood
type, will you?

Uh-huh.

Thank you.

Let's go, Dryden.

DR. MORGAN: If I find anything
else, where will you guys be?

Running down a
Nordic-type detective

who happens to have B-negative
blood flowing through his veins,

by the name of Hutchinson, Ken.

Come on, Simonetti.
On what grounds?

Oh, come on, captain.

If it was anybody else,

you would have
busted him yourself.

We're not talking
about anybody else.

We're talking about
Detective Sergeant Hutchinson.

And I'll bet my job on it.

Don't do it, captain.

There are too many
things starting to add up.

And it warrants
temporary suspension.

Until the investigation
is concluded,

he should hang up
his badge and his g*n.

Captain, Hutch remembers...

Oh. Laverne and Shirley.

Suppose we come back.

No, no. Come in here.

We're all on the same
team, remember?

Yeah, well, suppose
you tell, um...

whatshisname that.

You were about to
share some information

regarding the deceased?

I don't know if I want
to share anything

with you, Simonetti.

DOBEY: If you've got something

pertaining to this
case, lay it out.

Well, it isn't much.

Well, come on,
whatever it is. Lay it out.

Vanessa was talking about
getting into some big money.

From where? I don't know where!

Didn't you ask?

Captain, I thought
she was kidding

or maybe into something shady.

I didn't push it.

You're a police officer...

and you didn't push it

when you thought she
was into something illeg...?

What are you trying
to say, Simonetti?

Oh, I'm just trying to determine

whether you're lying,
delinquent or just plain stupid.

Take it easy. Come on.

You're walking a thin
line with these dudes.

Yeah, okay.

But I'm not.

DOBEY: Starsky!

Now, all of you, cool it.

Are you all right, Simonetti?

[PANTING]

All right, captain. All right.

It's your move.

We're going full speed
ahead with our investigation.

SIMONETTI: Any other cop

would have been
suspended and you know it.

If you don't want

to make that decision,

the commissioner will.

Let's go, Dryden.

And I'll be seeing you, Starsky.

Count on it.

You got it.

That was real dumb, Starsky.

Should have let me hit him.

You're both out of line!

Captain, he's gonna
hang me out to dry.

I'm gonna give you a couple of
days off so you can leave town...

No, make it a week. No way.

That's an order. What
are you telling me?

You don't make it easy.

My ex-wife is k*lled
in my own living room,

and you're talking about easy!

All right, then,
I'll make it official.

As long as Internal Affairs
are investigating this case,

you're temporarily suspended.

Come on, captain.
My hands are tied.

There's nothing
I can do about it.

Hutchinson. Hutchinson!

I'll have your w*apon

and your shield.

[BANGS w*apon ON DESK]

You don't really think
he's guilty, do you?

Of course not.

But you know
regulations are regulations.

You know what you can
do with those regulations?

[POLICE CAR SCREECHES]

Hey!

That's my car you're rousting.

Yeah, we know. Any objections?

HUTCH: I just don't like

to have my interior
decorating messed with.

Hey, found something.

What's that?

We figure you know.

SIMONETTI: Nice piece.

Yeah, well, uh...

Vanessa was into
costume jewelry and, uh...

Probably fell out of her purse.

Is that your
engagement stone, girls?

Let your partner tell you.

Come on, Dryden.
Let's check it out.

That thing real?

Who knows?

Where did they find it?

Found it underneath the seat.

Starsky, if that
thing is real...

Well, we can buy ourselves
a retirement villa in Rio.

That's not very funny.

Where you going?

I'm gonna keep an eye on them.

You go home, sit
tight. I'll catch up.

[CLATTERING]

[FABRIC TEARING]

[WHISPERING] Okay.

HUTCH: Hey!

[CARDWELL GRUNTING]

CARDWELL: Think
he's carrying it?

BOYLE: Oh, no, he's
probably got it stashed by now.

Forget it. Let's go
see Mr. Wheeler.

He'll work out something
for our friend here.

STARSKY: It's a setup!

It has to be.

But with whom?

Can we see you, captain?
I think we should be alone.

Why don't you fill
out a form in triplicate.

I'll tell you where
you can file it.

I assume you want to see me
about the ex-Mrs. Hutchinson.

And the present Mr. Hutchinson.

Well, don't be
looking at Starsky.

He ain't going anywhere.

DOBEY: What you got?

A warrant for
Hutchinson's arrest.

What?

The charge is m*rder One.

You guys gotta be crazy.

The DA doesn't think so.

DOBEY: Just because
a woman was sh*t

by a police officer's w*apon?

Ex-wife. Had a witnessed
fight in a public place.

Everybody fights
with their ex-wives.

And to my recollection,
most of them are still alive.

DOBEY: So you got some
circumstantial evidence.

It's not enough to bust an
honest officer like Hutchinson.

What about a motive?

Is a million bucks

enough of a motive?

Over a million.

What are you talking about?

The piece Dryden
found in Hutch's car.

No glass. The real
goods. Seventy carats.

I haven't heard of a stone like
that since the one from Dallas.

Two years ago, a
homicide and a robbery.

But it was fenced
out of this city.

You know who was
assigned to that case, captain?

Not Hutch.

He's been with me since
he came into the department.

Give or take a few.

You were in the
hospital, Starsky.

DOBEY: He handled
this one alone.

SIMONETTI: There it is, captain.

They never did find that piece,

because Hutch and his
ex were playing the game.

I'll add it up for you.

Strong circumstantial
evidence, a powerful motive

and a million-dollar gem.

What are you gonna do, captain?

Starsky...

I don't have any choice.

Hutch didn't k*ll anybody.

He'll have his day in court.

DOBEY: What I know
and what my duty is

are two different things.

Now, it says, "Hutchinson,
for m*rder One."

Bring him in.

Help the man out, Dryden...

just in case there
are any slip-ups.

I'll bring him in.

I'll bring him in
with my resignation.

Hey.

Give me a couple of
minutes with him, huh?

I'm coming with you.

I'm ending a -year partnership.

A couple of minutes
too much to ask?

All right. But I'm
right behind you.

No fooling.

[SLOW KNOCKING AT DOOR]

Who is it?

STARSKY: Me.

If you had a party last night,

you had some
pretty rowdy guests.

They were rowdy, all right.

What happened?

I didn't get the number
of the truck that hit me,

but when it happened, I
had my hands on Cardwell.

STARSKY: Cardwell?

Works for Avery Wheeler.

The fence?

The biggest.

Hey, you don't suppose

that Vanessa was tied into
Wheeler in some way, do you?

Maybe she was
supposed to deliver a piece

and then changed her
avaricious little mind.

Want some coffee?

No.

Simonetti and Dryden check out

that piece of glass
they found in my car?

Yeah.

And?

Seventy carats.

What?

Yeah, it's worth
over a million bucks.

Well, that doesn't look
too good for me, does it?

DRYDEN: My sentiments exactly.

Hey, I thought I asked
you to wait in the car!

Did you give it to him yet?

What are you talking about?

Give me what?

Invitation to a
policeman's ball.

What is this, some kind of joke?

It's no joke, Hutchinson.

You're awful quiet, buddy.

Hey, I didn't write that thing.

But you brought it over here.

Would you rather a creep
like Dryden brought the news?

HUTCH: No, it's a lot more
fun when a friend does it.

Come on, we're wasting time.

Hold on a minute.

[SIGHS]

You're not gonna
take me in, are you?

Dobey gave me
orders to do just that.

I don't believe you.

Hey, how long have
we known each other?

Too long, it seems.

Well, in all that time,

have you ever
known me to disobey

an order of Captain Dobey's?

[SIGHING]

Hey, I'm gonna bring him in.

Why don't you just go
and search the joint?

Are you kidding? I'm not
letting him out of my sight.

You're really something.
DRYDEN: That's right.

Next thing, you're gonna
want to be cuffed to him.

That's not a bad idea.

Hey.

He's my partner.

Right.

I bet you wouldn't even
trust your mother, would you?

You're wasting time.

I hate to do this
to you, partner.

I can tell it's
breaking your heart.

[CLOSES CUFF]

You happy, Dryden?

Let's go, Hutchinson.

Okay.

Hey!

Please, don't think badly of us.

I'm gonna have your
badge for this, Starsky.

Oh, by the way,
Dryden, there's coffee

on top of the stove
there if you can reach it.

Make yourself at home, huh?

I still think we should
have taken my car.

The striped tomato?

Driving around in that

is about as discreet as
riding on a homecoming float.

At least it's got some speed.
What happens if we run into...

Speak of the devil. Hold on.

[TIRES SCREECH]

We okay?

Fine. Now I know how it
feels to be the bad guys.

Where are we going, anyway?

Some kind of a hangout where
we can figure how to nail Wheeler.

You wouldn't know any place
for a couple of fugitives to go,

would you?

[KNOCKING AT DOOR]

HUGGY: Just a minute!

[IMPATIENT RAPPING AT DOOR]

Okay, okay. Okay!

This had better be a
national emergency.

STARSKY: It is.

There's a warrant
out for Hutch's arrest.

We also need to borrow
your white Caddie.

Well, you can stand there
with your mouth open.

Just close the door, huh?

Can I use your phone?

HUGGY: What if I said no?

Thank you.

Captain Dobey, please.

Wonder if he's
still in this late.

Are you kidding? By now,
there's an APB out on both of us.

Dobey.

You have such a charming way

of answering the
telephone, captain.

Starsky, where are you?
And where's Hutchinson?

And where's Dryden?

Dryden is relaxing
in Hutch's apartment.

We need your help.

And how about giving me some?

Simonetti's about to
go to the commissioner,

hanging me out to dry.

Hey, listen.

If you don't get in
here with Hutchinson,

you're gonna have a
new captain in hours.

We think we can handle
this one in hours.

Look, can you get me a
picture of that diamond?

I guess so. Why?

And release it to the newspapers

that Hutch, a cop, is
wanted for m*rder One.

You call that help?

Look, I can't give you
any details now, captain,

but I think we can
nail Vanessa's k*ller.

And what if it doesn't?

Well, if it doesn't,

you can come visit Hutch
and I in San Quentin.

Yeah?

Wheeler.

Who are you? What do you want?

Give this to Wheeler.

He'll want to see me.

BOYLE: He's a cop.

STARSKY: I'm Hutch's partner.

Why are you here?

STARSKY: They want
me to bring in Hutch.

That's like cutting off
my arm. I ain't going for it.

What has that got to do with me?

We need some
get-out-of-town money.

Do I look like a bank to you?

Hutch has got the
diamond. You want it.

Let's not play games.

Any jewel collector would
want a stone like that.

So?

Unmarked cash, small bills.

It's yours.

Perhaps I could
scrape together ,.

You're a generous man.

That's carats. That's
worth at least a million.

A-ha!

Why don't you take
out an advertisement?

A hundred thousand. No less.

How do I know that
you're not setting me up?

'Cause if they can bring in
my partner on a m*rder One,

I want no part of this
police department, this city

or this country.

Now, are we gonna do a deal,

or am I gonna go
shopping elsewhere?

Very well.

Tell your partner to
bring the stone here at...

I may be short on
luck, but not brains.

Neutral territory.

Very well.

Where and when?

Hutch.

Before we proceed,

I'd like just to
check for a wire.

Just a standard business
practice, if you don't mind.

No.

Just to make sure
we all play fair.

Fair enough.

There's no tap.

All we're interested
in is the money.

Uh-uh, take it easy there.

I'm ticklish. Ah!

The diamond, please.

The money first.

Of course.

Thank you.

[SNAPS OPEN]

Oh-ho-ho!

HUTCH: Will you
look at that, huh?

Our first-class ticket to Rio!

If you blink your eye, you die.

Hey, I thought we
had a deal here.

I detest paying for
my own property.

But not enough to k*ll,
Wheeler. You don't have the guts.

I wish Vanessa were here.

She'd tell you
a different story.

You k*lled Vanessa?

Let's say I arranged
for her death.

WHEELER: And for a tiny million,

I'd be willing to do
the same for you.

Freeze, sucker!

[g*nsh*t]

Come on out,
Grandma. It's all clear.

Did you get it?

Every word.

WHEELER [OVER TAPE]:
Let's say I arranged for her death.

And for a tiny million, I'd
be willing to do the same...


You saved the day, Hug.

Hey, don't tell me I put my
life on the line for a peach pit!

We'll keep the lid on it.

[WHISTLING]

[CLEARS THROAT]

Well, I thought it was
real nice of the IA boys

to drop the hearing against me.

For a while I thought I
was gonna be out a partner.

Still, it's nice to
know I'd be missed.

Are you kidding?

It took me months to
show you the ropes.

I don't want to go through
all that mess again.

Besides, in a while, I'm gonna
be independently wealthy.

[CLEARS THROAT]

Is this the, uh...

little fella I've been
hearing so much about?

Louise.

You mean, you
paid $ for this?

Two hundred and fifty
dollars is very reasonable

for a chinchilla.

But it's a king's
ransom for a guinea pig.

Hmm?

A what?

My wife's cousin
Archie used to raise 'em.

You could get a whole
bushel of them for $.

[SQUEAKS]

STARSKY: Ten dollars?

It's a member of
the rodent family.

As in, uh, "rat."

[LAUGHING]
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