02x10 - Snooty

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Lilo & Stitch". Aired: September 20, 2003 – July 29, 2006.*
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Continuing where Stitch! The Movie left off, Lilo and Stitch are given the task of collecting the rest of Jumba's missing experiments, changing them from bad to good, and finding the one place where they truly belong.
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02x10 - Snooty

Post by bunniefuu »

Tookie bah waba!

Hao!

Iki bah bah.

Ha ha ha.

♪ I Laila 'o kaua'i la ♪

♪ no malihini ohana ♪

♪ welcome, cousins,
a-come on by ♪

♪ aloha, e komo mai ♪

♪ I Laila 'o kaua'i la ♪

♪ no malihini ohana ♪

♪ welcome, cousins,
a-come on by ♪

♪ aloha, e komo mai ♪

♪ aloha, e komo mai ♪

♪ iki tookie nee hi! ♪

♪ Iki tookie nee hi! ♪

♪ Aka tiki bah bah ♪

♪ aka tiki bah bah ♪

♪ gabba ika tasoopa? ♪

♪ Gabba ika tasoopa? ♪

Ooocha! Chi-ka!

♪ Miki miki coconut ♪

♪ I Laila 'o kaua'i la ♪

♪ no malihini ohana ♪

♪ welcome, cousins,
a-come on by ♪

♪ aloha, e komo mai ♪

♪ aloha, e komo mai ♪

♪ aloha, e komo mai ♪

Harrr... harrr...

- harrr... blah!
-

whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Less "harrr," and
more "auooooo..."

Remember, you're
a zombie pirate.

Oh, right. Heh heh.

Auooo... Auooo...

that's it! Work it!

Connect with your inner zombie.

Ok, time for June.

Modelling is really hard work.

So we have to do new
outfits for every month?

Paying customers will demand

different pictures
in their calendars.

Ok. Bring on the next ensemble.

A zombie June bride!

Rrrr... Rrrr... Hmm...

Something's not right.

Bouquet of dead flowers!

Ehh!

What are we gonna do with all the
money we make from the calendar?

I'm thinking a pilgrimage to...

Graceland! Graceland!

I'm really glad you
moved to kauai, Victoria.

Hagada!

Looks great.

Ahhh... ahhh... Choo!

Allergies.

No problem. I like it.

Grrrok!

Herrehh!

Rrreeow!

Aah!

Do you think Jenny
will make it to the final ?

Who cares? This show is lame.

Everyone's such a sap.

What about Jack?

He's just pretending to be a sap

in order to increase
his chance of winning.

Oh... is that why
you act like a sap?

'Cause it's not working.

You're still a loser.

Quiet! I'm trying to...

Warning... Experiment
activated.

Oh...

Primary function, mine
and enrich snootonium.

Snootonium?

There's no snootonium on earth.

This experiment is useless.

Hey! The TV!

TV-schmeevee!

Get up off your
enormously useless behind

and go capture that experiment

or I will cancel your useless
entertainment service!

Ehh... yes, sir.

I suppose I'll miss
the big season finale.

Want me to record it for ya?

You... wouldn't mind?

Hey, what are friends for?

Trust me.

The pictures look great.

Especially march.

Zombie leprechauns
is gonna be a big hit!

Ah-choo!

Stupid allergies!

Wait. I think my cat
wants to come in.

Aah! Hello?! Victoria?!

What's wrong?!

There's a vampire
outside my window!

You guys gotta
come back here quick

and help me get rid of it!

A vampire? Here?

Finally!

I mean... Don't worry.

Keep the vampire at your house

and we'll be right there.

A real live vampire on kauai?

I've been training for this

my whole life.

Ok, stitch, break out
the vampire hunting kit.

You don't slay vampires
with wooden stakes.

That's just a myth
perpetrated by Hollywood.

Aka do baba?

Yeah, garlic works.

But the best
thing ever is this...

Vampire exterminator.

This stuff is the truth.

Ooh... Careful, stitch.

It's deadly.

Mm-mmm!

Ok, gotta keep it here.

Where'd it go?

Aah!

Did we bring everything?

Vampire exterminator...
Garlic... Ehh.

Did you bring the
garlic in your stomach?

Stitch, if we don't have garlic,

how will we force
him into our trap?

Victoria, shouting: Help!

Victoria!

Victoria!

He's trying to suck my blood!

Ah-choo! Ah-choo!

Ow oochimay.

Did you slay it yet?

Ah-choo!

Almost.

Try to get him to come this way.

Ooh... garlic burp.

Good job, stitch.

Turn to dust, you undead
creature of the night!

It's not working.

I wonder if grape jelly expires.

I should have known
I'd find you here, trog!

Gantu?

What's he doing here?

This is one time you won't
take an experiment from me.

Experiment?

Cousin.

No wonder the
vampire exterminator

didn't work on him.

He's an experiment.

Give me the
abomination right now!

Take it, please.

I knew you'd fix the problem.

Victoria, you don't understand.

Come to papa.

Ouch!

What's stitch doing?

That big guy's going to
take the vampire for us.

That little guy isn't a vampire.

He's an illegal
genetic experiment

from another planet.

Like stitch.

Stitch is an alien?!

Yeah. Sorry.

I should have told you.

But... Let go, you
miserable trog!

We have to make
friends with the vampire.

I mean experiment.

Make friends with it?!

It att*cked me.

They start out
wanting to do bad stuff,

but they can be made good.

Rrrrr... ah!

So you're not going to slay it?

Stitch! The experiment!

It's getting away!

Miserable trog!

We have to get him
before gantu does.

I'm not going.

That thing's dangerous.

Please, Victoria?

I trusted you enough to tell you

about stitch being
an alien experiment.

Now will you trust me?

Well... ok.

Nope. Nope. Nope.

Aha! See!

I told you he wasn't a vampire.

Experiment ,

designed to mine and enrich

shooch... snuhhh... Snootonium!

Snootonium is rare,
intergalactic energy source.

Is it dangerous?

Oh, no.

Is quite harmless.

See? Not dangerous.

Until enriched.

Then is becoming
extremely unstable

and extra-big dangerous.

"Extra-big dangerous"?

But there is no
snootonium on earth.

So, no dangerings here.

"No dangerings here".

See? We'll catch him,
bring him back here,

and then figure out
what his one true place is.

I think I'll name him... Snooty.

We shouldn't be naming
something that we might be slaying.

We won't need to slay him.

You'll see. Pretty soon

he'll be snuggled up
right here at our house.

Oh, no!

You're not bringing another
one of those monsters over here!

They're dangerous!

They are?

See this? And this?

And these?

All damaged by one of those!

Stay away from
them. Far, far away!

Don't worry.

Pleakley's kind
of a nervous type.

I am not!

I just don't like these extremely
dangerous little monsters

you're trying to make
into friends. And...

Heh heh. Don't worry.

He's mostly kidding.

Ah-choo! Ah-choo!

I think fear makes
my allergies worse.

Trust me.

I'm gonna prove that the
experiment can be good.

Ok.

Catch anything?

No. Of course you didn't.

Please, not now.

I sustained an injury.

Know how I know you
didn't catch anything?

'Cause big h cut the
cable! That's how!

He cut the cable?
But what about...

Your show? Sorry. Didn't get it.

But... but... what happened
to Jack... And Jenny?

What'll we do
without television?!

Well, hamsterviel did
let us keep one channel.

No. No...

Coming up on the
sandwich channel...

The mysteries of mayonnaise.

No!

Don't worry, Victoria,

you'll be glad you trusted me.

Ah-choo!

Gesundheit, Victoria.

Allergies?

Sorry, officer kaheiko,

no time for chit-chat today.

We're chasing a vampire.

Ha ha ha. Oh, yeah?

That sounds fun.

It's not a vampire.

It's a... whoa!

Vampire!

You girls go get in my
car and I'll take you home.

Ah-choo!

Come on, lilo.

You heard what officer... ahh!

Aah!

It does kinda look
like a vampire.

Help! It's trying to bite me!

Come here, you!

Wait! Don't let him go!

Lilo, get in the car.

Look out!

Unh! Stitch, do something!

Raa!

Zay pooger!

Unh!

Stitch!

Whoa. Waa. Whoa.

The vampire
sucked all his blood.

Ooh... Harta blah blah.

Stitch?

Does he have any blood left?

I... I think so.

He's pretty indestructible.

I think he just needs
a little time to recover.

Then we can follow snooty

and try to catch him.

No.

What?!

But we have a deal.

Sorry, lilo, that monster

doesn't need to be caught.

It needs to be slayed.

And if you're not gonna do it,

then I will.

Excuse me, do you
have any wooden stakes?

What you need it for,

home improvements
or vegetable gardening?

Vampire slaying.

Aisle .

This one feels pretty good..

Hey, buddy move along, will ya?

You're scaring the
paying customers.

Please, just a few more minutes.

My cable was cut, recently.

You don't know what it's like!

Cry me a river, yada yada.

Be outta here in !

Hello.

You're trying to catch that
vampire monster thing, right?

You're one of that little
abomination-loving girl's friends!

Well, I didn't catch it,

so stop bothering me.

Do you still want to?

'Cause I do.

And I think it's an
abomination, too.

Really?

I don't get it.

Why did snooty att*ck
stitch and Victoria?

Hmm. Maybe because
he's a monster?!

That's what Victoria thinks.

Ding, ding, ding!

Congratulations, lilo.

You finally made a friend

with a good head
on her shoulders.

I'm not sure she wants
to be my friend anymore

on account of I
want to save snooty.

I say ditch the monsters,

keep the friend.

You two are so cute together...

Giggling and
dressing like zombies

and hogging the phone for hours.

Oh, what I wouldn't
give for a friend like that.

Yeah. And she does love stitch.

Well, there ya go!

She loves the monster
that really counts.

What more could you ask for?

I wish she trusted me.

Mm, my scans indicate that
is completely healthy.

So why is he wiped out?

Well, there is one change to
's physio-biomechanology

after the att*ck
by experiment .

He has been
drained of all mucus.

Mucus?!

Unfortunately, is
particularly susceptible

to 's att*ck.

His body is . % mucus.

So he is now, shall
we say, dehydrated.

But the effect is
only temporary.

Why would snooty want mucus

when he was created
to mine snootonium?

I ask myself same question

and have come up
with exciting theory.

Snootonium is very similar
in chemical composition

to earth mucus.

Experiment is
drawn to individuals

with large quantities, like .

So... you mean...

Snooty really is a vampire?

A snot vampire?

Precisely.

Then snooty wasn't
really attacking anybody.

He was just doing
what he was built to do.

Yes. Find snootonium
and enrich it.

Aah! Do you know what
kind of ecological devastation

could be wreaked on
our little corner of paradise

by a single barrel of
enriched snootonium?

Ehh, a little widespread
devastation. No biggie.

"No biggie"?!

Need I remind you that
the ecological balance

of this little blue
mosquito nest of a planet

is very fragile?

We have to find that experiment

and neutralize it!

Ah, jumba will work
on neutralizing solution

while you go find 's lair.

I think I know where it is.

Snooty was flying
towards mt. Waialiali.

We'll go in the buggy.

Kiba tiba.

Ooh... ooh.

I think I better drive.

Is that what you're gonna
slay the vampire with?

Yes, though it isn't
technically a vampire.

It is experiment .

And I'm not
actually slaying it...

I'm apprehending it on behalf of

Dr. Jacques Von hamsterviel,

and transporting it to
him on a prison asteroid.

As long as it's not on kauai.

Come with me.

But... why?

Just trust me.

Ah-choo!

Hang on. We're
going around a turn.

Can't you go any faster?

These are steep mountain roads.

Safety-first driving techniques

demand that I maintain
control of the vehicle

at all times.

This thing flies, you know.

Flying?!

Through these jagged canyons?!

Whoaaaaaaaa... Look out!

Aah... Whoa... Aah...

Flying?! Flying?!

Can't keep my eye on
the road when I'm flying!

Arda blah blah.

This is the lair of
the abomination.

Ah-choo!

What are these?

Something abominable.

Ugh! Gross!

So, what do we do?

You just stand there.

The experiment seems
inexplicably drawn to you.

You mean... You're
using me as bait?!

And why not?

You said I could trust you.

You live, you learn.

There he is!

Aah!

Aah!

I missed.

Ahh... Wait!

Oh, no.

The big dummy's here.

Aah!

You're too late, earthling.

I've got the
experiment cornered...

Thanks to your friend here.

Victoria?

You're helping gantu?

I'm sorry, lilo.

I just wanted to get
rid of the monster.

He's not a monster.

You've gotta trust me.

That's what gantu said, too.

One big difference...
I'm your friend.

Ah-choo!

Where... Is the reverse...

On this thing?

Heh heh heh heh heh.

Finally.

Now I can get
back to my program.

Not if I can help it. Unh!

You big dummy!

Oh, please.

Oof! Unh! Ooh!

Oof! Ouch! Unh...

It's ok, little guy.

You... saved him.

You were right, lilo.

He's not a monster at all.

I should have trusted you.

You were kinda right, too.

Snooty actually is a vampire.

You know, a snot vampire.

No wonder he kept chasing me.

My allergies!

Ahh.

I can breathe!

I think he likes you.

Maybe he could
come live with me.

Really?!

He could keep my sinuses clear.

Aha! Finally!

I hope he had insurance.

No, I didn't capture
the experiment.

Oh, hey, gantu, hi.

You're... you're
home early, aren't ya?

, that's not the
sandwich channel.

When did we get the cable back?

Uh, you know, just now.

Yeah, right this second.

Heh heh. Amazing
coinky-dink, huh?

It was never out.

You just said that so you
could have it all to yourself!

I always said you were
a semi-intelligent species.

To think I trusted you.

Ehh. You live, you learn.

Oh, I've learned, all right.

I'll never trust anyone.

Ha ha! Ready or
not, boys and girls,

mackie macaw and
the hammerheads...

I love this guy.

Turn it up, would you?
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