08x15 - Space Escape

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Regular Show". Aired: September 6, 2010 – January 16, 2017.*
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Series revolves around the daily lives of two 23-year-old friends – Mordecai (a blue jay) and Rigby (a raccoon) – who work as groundskeepers at a park, and spend their days trying to avoid work and entertain themselves by any means.
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08x15 - Space Escape

Post by bunniefuu »

A few months ago, you folks were scrawny, weak, confused, drifting aimlessly in space utterly useless.

Until the Space Tree graciously took you in.

Was it a mistake?

Only time will tell.

And now those worthless, scrawny cadets stand before me as moderately serviceable Space Tree Rangers.

And, today, you'll graduate the Spark Initiative and soon be on your way to terraform your first planet.

I've already sent the coordinates into your dome's navigational computer along with your personal fighter ships.

Today is graduation day! There will be a ceremony tonight with light refreshments, compliments of the Space Tree.

Hope to see you there.

Ooh! Ooh! Graduation! Graduation! Wow, one minute I'm graduating high school, and now I'm graduating space.

Take that, Dad! Hm

-Hm! I don't think "light refreshments" are gonna cut it.

Comet Stop! Comet Stop! Dude, should we get Moon Cheddar and Onion or Milky Way Mesquite Barbecue?

What about Super Nova Nacho?

Eh, I'll just get 'em all.

It's not a party unless you have chips that taste like three different things! Come on, man! Hurry up with the change! Sorry, bro, my boss makes me count back all the change.

Well, my boss will freak out if we're late for the att*ck on the Space Tree, so hurry up! Sir! What's taking so long?

I

-I got your Cherry Space Splushee, just as you requested.

But this guy is taking too long to give me my change! Keep the change.

Heh heh! Bad show.

Jolly bad show! And he looked just like Pops, but evil.

Yeah, like an opposite Pops! Anti

-Pops! Anti

-Pops! Jinx.

He who will erase us.

Attention, Space Tree, this is your Captain speaking.

There's been a change of plans! You're all graduated, effective immediately Congrats! Your first mission as rangers starts now! Leave the Space Tree and get to your rendezvous points as soon as possible! Godspeed and good luck! Sir, an unknown ship just docked with the Space Tree! We're too late! Protect Pops! Make sure he gets off the Space Tree! What?

! Pops?

Huh?

! Why?

! Why me?

No time to explain, just go! Everybody, come on! No! I'm so confused! What's going on?

! Yeah, why's Pops so special?

Oh, I didn't ask for this! Why does everyone on the Space Tree have to suffer on my account?

We'll figure it out later, Pops.

Let's just do what Rawls said and get you out of here! There's a ship in the hanger we can take.

Sorry, sir, there's no sign of Pops anywhere.

Where is he?

I told you I don't know! All right! He's he's on his way! You lie.

No, no! He'll be here in two minutes.

That's like a thousand push

-ups! A thousand push

-ups in two minutes?

Impossible! Watch me.

Hup! One, two, three, four, five.

One handed! Clapping! Double clapping! Fingertips! Fingertip! Aztec push

-ups! Triple dip push

-ups! Toe

-toe

-toe push

-ups! Riding push

-ups! Should I take him out, sir?

No, no.

I want to see how this ends.

There's the ship, and it's not alone.

This is so boring! Oh, hush up! Keep an eye out for the one with the big head.

Wow, is that Super Nova Nacho?

You holding out on us, Jeff?

Come on, Jeff.

You know we don't speak Lizarkian.

Come on! Let's get out of here! I'm not going! Come on, Pops! We gotta go! We can't just abandon everyone! I'm going back to save them.

It's what a real Space Tree Ranger would do! Hm

-Hm

-Hm

-Hm

-Hm

-Hm

-Hm I've got an idea.

Huh! Barrel roll! Huh! Toe touch! Huh! Somersault! Enough! If someone doesn't bring me Pops right now, you can say farewell to your Space Tree and yourselves! Sir, look! You're too late.

Guards, get to your ships! We cannot lose them! I told you to get Pops off the Space Tree! We couldn't leave you behind! It's not the Space Tree Ranger way.

Hmm.

That's very noble of you, Pops.

Stupid, but noble.

You're a true Ranger.

It's a shame we have to cut the graduation short, but you have no idea what danger lies ahead of you.

Everybody, we don't have much time! Get to your domes and warp out of here as fast as you can! Follow us! There's a guard ahead! Don't worry, I got this.

Oh! Keep running! No, no, no, no.

No, no, no! What should we do now, sir?

Destroy them all! But leave Pops to me.

The dome room door is closing! Not on my watch! Cadets, move! Come on, Rawls let's get out of here! You guys go.

I'm staying here! Rawls, no! Just go! Whoo

-ya! Oh! Warp drive activated! One minute and counting.

Sureshot, give us your status! We're right behind you, Benson! Benson, warp out of here now! We'll hold them off! Brace yourselves! Aah! Who are these guys?

! Sureshot, what happened?

Sureshot?

! Need backup! Hm

-Hm

-Hm! Hm

-Hm

-Hm! We got this.

I can't shake 'em! Ha ha ha! What the?

! How 'bout some of this?

! Hm

-Hm

-Hm

-Hm

-Hm! Let's take that dweeb out! Mordecai, help! In yo face! Whoa! Whoa! This ends now! They've locked onto the dome with the tractor beam.

Warp us, Benson! I can't.

The controls are disabled! You two get back to the dome! We'll take it from here.

No, we're not leaving you! Just do it! We'll meet up with you guys later.

But you could die! Hey, there's nothing more sure than death.

Ugh, don't be so dramatic! We'll disable the tractor beam.

Mordecai, Rigby, just go! 30 seconds to warp speed.

So long, Pops.

Ship a*mo depleted.

We're out of a*mo! I'm not out of a*mo! Yeah, but with your aim, you don't have a chance, Sureshot! That's my name, don't wear it out.

Sureshot, no! Warp speed engaged.
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